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Chapter Fourteen: Rescue

We were jogging laps around the track next to the athletic fields during PE class when classmate and good buddy Taniguchi pointed at the roof of the admin building. I'd been up there hundreds of times with members of the SOS Brigade for various reasons so I almost expected him to point out Haruhi.

This time, however, a different girl explored the area. We watched as she climbed up a metal side ladder to get to the top of the utility room structure adjacent to the stairwell.

"What do you think she's up to?" Taniguchi said.

"I don't know," I said, "but if she's not careful, she's going to hurt herself."

"That's Angie Nigahara," Kunikida said. "She always wears a green ribbon in her hair."

"She's a real cutie," Taniguchi said. "But she's not very bright. I wonder if she knows what she's doing."

She got to the top of the square utility structure and took a run toward the edge. At the last second, she skidded to a stop.

"Holy shit," Kunikida said. "I think she's working up the courage to jump."

My focal point swung from the top of the structure to the ground. "She's five stories up and there's nothing below her but pavement. If she jumps from that height, she's definitely going to kill herself."

Soon, more of my classmates got wind of what was happening. One by one, the students in my PE class stopped their activities and focused their attention on the distant roof.

Angie sauntered back and forth, her body slumped over, her cries barely audible from where we stood.

I dashed to the admin building. Once inside, I sprinted up the back stairs. Huffing and puffing, I made it to the roof access grill of the top floor auxiliary stairwell landing — a secret entrance Haruhi had found during her many explorations of the school grounds, and one she'd later revealed to the rest of her brigade.

It had taken me a couple of minutes to get to the top floor. I hoped I wasn't too late. I pulled down the folding metal ladder, shimmied through the access square, and stepped out onto the roof. Thankfully, Angie hadn't jumped yet.

As I trotted toward the utility building, I noticed a school chair wedged between the door and a guard rail, keeping the main access door tightly shut. Some pounding clued me in to the others trying to gain access to the roof.

It looked like the girl was about to make another run for it.

"Hey, Angie," I shouted.

She stopped dead in her tracks.

"What are you doing?"

"What does it look like, you idiot? I'm going to kill myself. If you take one step closer, I'll dive. Don't even think about climbing up those steps." She pointed to the side ladder.

I held up my palms. "You've been up here for a while, so you're not totally sure you want to kill yourself yet. Am I correct?"

"Oh, I'm sure about this, all right. I've got absolutely nothing to live for."

"Why do you say that?"

"I just got the results of my college entrance examinations." She put her face in her hands. "I failed horribly."

"That's just a stupid test. It's no reason to go and kill yourself."

"That's easy for you to say. How did you do on your exam?"

"To be honest, I did okay. Not the best, but it'll be good enough to get me into the school I want."

Angie started bawling. "I hate people like you. People who have got it made. Passing your tests, hanging out with your buddies, and snuggling up with your beautiful girlfriend… even if she is a little weird."

"Haruhi Suzumiya is not my girlfriend."

"Oh, bullshit. Everybody knows you two are a pair."

Everybody but me. I shook my head.

She continued, "I've got nothing to live for. My life is ruined. There's no reason to go on." She stepped up to the edge and looked down. I got the impression she might jump this time.

"Wait." I waved my hand. "Let me share something with you before you jump. Please give me that chance."

She turned to me with tear-streaked cheeks. "What?"

"I want to make you an offer."

She peeked over the edge, then back at me. "Go on."

"If you come down here, I'll let you suck my dick."

"What?" She looked at me in disbelief. "I haven't even kissed a boy yet, and you're offering to let me suck your stupid penis? You sick, twisted pervert."

"Haven't you ever wondered what they look like in person?" I moved my hands toward my zipper and lowered it as I walked.

She didn't reply but remained mesmerized, her eyes following me as I performed my silly striptease.

I stopped when the utility room stood between me and the rest of campus, blocking the view of the voyeurs below. People were still pounding on the roof entrance door but not getting in.

I whipped out my manhood.

Angie's demeanor instantly changed. Her body relaxed, and her eyes widened. "Oh, wow." She moved toward me. "Is that for real?"

I put my hands on my hips and rocked from side to side, letting my manhood swing. "It certainly is."

She bent forward and looked down. "Your penis is so beautiful. I've seen drawings in health class and stuff, but I never knew real ones were so amazing."

"I'll let you suck it if you come down from there."

"For real?"

"That depends." I tried lightening up the mood. "Have you brushed your teeth?"

She nodded. "I brush them twice a day."

I waved her down. "Go to town then."

Angie scampered down the steps, ran around the utility building, and crouched before me. With a wide happy grin, she took hold of my penis and looked up. "I always wondered why a girl as pretty as Haruhi Suzumiya would be interested in someone as conventional as you. This answers everything."

Before I could protest, she sucked my dick into her mouth and gazed up at me with content, hopeful eyes. "I hope I'm doing this okay," she said, her words garbled around my penis.

I patted her head. "I've never had better."

She giggled. "I know that's a lie." She continued sucking me off.

It struck me as odd, as I stood there on the roof with my fingers intertwined behind my neck, that despite all the sex I'd been getting from my harem, this girl thought she was competing with the oral expertise of Haruhi Suzumiya.

It struck me as even odder that Angie had nailed it. In fact, all of my sexual experiences since getting blown by my dutiful brigade leader on that fateful day came up short. When oral sex escalated to regular sex with Ruma, Haruhi eventually stepped in and said, I'll show you how this works. When regular sex escalated to anal sex with Tsuruya, once again, Haruhi stepped up and bent over. I'll show you how that's done as well.

As much as I enjoyed my daily trysts with Ruma, Mikuru, and Yuki, and my weekend deviations with Tsuruya, none of their efforts compared.

Then it hit me — Haruhi's three orifices were as magical as my penis.

This led to another inescapable truth. It hadn't been Haruhi's faulty reasoning that made my dick irresistible. Penetrating the glorious orifices of the goddess of this universe made it so. This also explained why each subsequent penetration of a Haruhi-hole made my dick more wonderful.

Despite her inexperience, Angie turned out to be a natural. It didn't take long before I filled her mouth with cream, and though I enjoyed the hell out of her blowjob, it wasn't Suzumiyan.

"Thank you." Angie wiped her mouth on her sleeve and swallowed. "I had no idea anything on earth could taste that good. Thanks for showing me there's something to live for."

As she rose to her feet, I put myself away. When Angie stepped forward and hugged me, I hugged her back.

"I know you're kind of taken," she said, "but do you think Miss Suzumiya would mind if I sucked you off now and then after I get out of all the trouble I'm going to be in?"

"I suppose I could ask her."