"Slow Burn"(def.): an attraction for someone that is not instant, but grows over time.
-x-
Chapter Twenty One: Where Did You Sleep Last Night
My girl, my girl…
Don't lie to me
Tell me,
Where did you sleep last night?
-x-
He ducked out of the room the second he saw her slip out and he had no shame in following her into a remote corner near the ladies room, a sneaking suspicion told him that maybe she had wanted him to.
And Yamato knew it was a bad idea to go after her, afterall nothing good could come of them being in a small space together, isolated from the rest of the party. They had narrowly avoided the repercussions the last time they had been alone. Something told him, this time they wouldn't be so lucky.
Yet all the red flags and blaring sirens weren't enough to make him turn around. He just couldn't resist her pull.
It was like she was the sun and he was moon.
Or maybe she was the moon and he was the tide.
The wolf.
He would chase her to the ends of the earth, just to howl at her reflection full of sorrow.
He hadn't meant to get so close, hadn't meant to corner her, his body mere centimeters from hers. And in that dress that should have been illegal, he knew he was a goner. He could feel the heat radiating off her body in waves and it drew him in closer. Closer to her skin that smelled like cherry blossoms and her wine stained lips and her glassy bambi eyes.
He didn't even try to think away his impending arousal, it was absolutely of no use.
Instead, he chose to drown in her.
She turned her gaze upwards, rosy lips parting in a small sigh. "You were so…" She reached her arms up, hands clasping behind his neck loosely. "You were born for that, Matt. You've never been more at home." She had always been his number one fan.
His biggest supporter.
And prior to becoming the entire soccer team's cheerleader, his own personal one.
"Thanks." He bit back the self deprecation about how his music would never be good enough to pay the bills, accepting her adoration instead.
"Your art matters, Matt. It saved me from a lot of loneliness more times than I can count." She said with hardworn sincerity.
He gave her a smile, a real one that sent her stomach on a roller coaster. "You've saved me from a lot of loneliness, Mimi. A lifetime of it." He had never really known how to need someone until he had no idea it had already happened. "That's why I'm so afraid of this, of us. Because I love you, Mimi, in so many more ways than I could possibly explain. And I just don't want to lose you."
At least... that's what he should have said.
But he said nothing, as usual.
Besides, there were a lot of things he'd rather do with his mouth that were infinitely better than talking.
He put a hand against the wall, behind her head. He wanted to touch her so badly, feel her soft skin under his hands but he wouldn't—not yet.
He needed to make sure it was okay with her before he made any kind of move.
But she was champagne drunk and bouncing off the walls and all she wanted was to kiss him senseless.
For once, all she wanted was to do exactly what she was feeling and forget about the repercussions. And she knew it was off the emotions from the performance, from her birthday, from his music—but she didn't care.
She didn't want to care.
She wanted to be weak without feeling guilty.
She wanted to give into her darkest desires without hating herself.
She wanted him.
One of his hands dropped over her waist, his fingers trailing down the side until they rested against her hip.
She felt skin humming to life at his touch.
They shouldn't, this was already too dangerous, they were already crossing too many lines.
Individually, they had both promised that this couldn't continue, that they couldn't do this.
But maybe just this once? A voice tempted her.
It's not like you haven't kissed her before… Something said inside him.
And without warning, their lips collided, rough and passionate and this time there was no love. There was no tenderness.
Nothing gentle or sweet.
It was a hot need—primal intention.
And there was no going back.
It's gonna be different this time, I'll have no expectations. She promised herself.
Things have to be different this time. I love this girl. He vowed silently.
He dropped his hand into her hair, grabbing at the silky tresses by the handful. He had dreamt of this moment for so many nights, woke up so incredibly disappointed and angry. And all of that seemed to fade to black as he tried to swallow her whole. He wanted nothing more than to feel every inch of her pressed beneath him like a second skin.
She tugged at his tie, "Who knew Yamato Ishida did formal wear." She got out between breaths, her voice husky and broken.
"For you, I would." He said as she unknotted the tie and loosened a few buttons, spilling clumsy kisses across his chest.
He pulled her lips back to his with a playful jerk of her hair. Until he impatiently wrenched his lips away to drag them down the column of her long neck. Were there enough days in his life to satisfy his need to appreciate every single part of her body.
She tasted like strawberry wine and black cherry licorice. Her smell intoxicating and maddening. Her delicate little touches driving him to near insanity.
"How?" He asked out loud.
Her eyes snapped up, "What?" She asked with a slight twitch of her lips.
"How did I ever stay away from you?"
It had come out with such candor, such poetic innocence and wrapped in such sweet vulnerability.
That she had to ignore it.
There was no way she was slipping back down that rabbit hole, not when she had just begun to climb her way out.
Her hands found their way into his dress shirt, her lips against his throat as his hands grasped for every inch of her. When he decided close wasn't close enough, he cupped his hands around her butt and raised her up until her legs wrapped around his waist.
And suddenly everything was moving entirely too quickly but simultaneously not fast enough. Like a slow snowball tumbling downhill gradually becoming an avalanche.
His hands squeezed into her as she curled her fingers into his hair. She heard herself letting out breathy moans against his lips, her hips grinding into him with veracity.
"Should we—
"We should get a roo—
But neither of them got their sentences out, unable to tear themselves away long enough.
Because they knew the moment they pulled apart, gave this some air—it would be over.
And she just couldn't bear it to be over, not when they had barely begun.
The sound of glass clinking to the floor cut sharply through their ears.
"Mimi!" The shocked gasp came from behind her and both she and Yamato turned their heads.
Zoe and Catherine were staring at them, mouths open, eyes wide.
Matt and Mimi looked back at each other, their current position still very much entangled.
Matt let her down slowly, averting his gaze and his lipstick stained face. Mimi tugged down the hem of her dress, smoothed out her hair and without another word, she began to walk away.
That was until he caught her wrist.
She stilled, as he came up behind her. "This isn't over." His lips brushed her ear as his words sent a shiver down her spine.
She didn't say a word, waited until his grip slackened and brushed past both blondes with her head held high.
After all, it was her party and she could make out if she wanted to.
Matt ran a hand through his hair, before turning towards the mens room to assess the damage.
"Yamato?" Zoe cleared her throat.
He stopped in his tracks, immediately regretting whatever was going to come next. "A word?" She requested, meeting Catherine's eye.
The other blonde differentially retreated back to the main lounge.
Matt heaved a long sigh, "What's up?" He asked coolly. "You like the performance?"
A dry laugh escaped her, "Which one?" She kinked a brow.
"The only one that would be your business." He shot back.
"Oh cut the crap, I thought that we were—
"You thought, what? Zoe?" He cut her off. "What part of our arrangement was unclear to you?"
Perhaps they hadn't defined what they were doing in words, but that was the whole point wasn't it? Not having to define a damn thing.
That meant there were no strings, no expectations, she wasn't allowed to ask questions.
Situations like this were not supposed to happen.
"The part where you said you would always be honest with me. Fooling around with Tachikawa behind my back was never part of the deal!"
Matt shrugged a shoulder, "It just happened." He muttered. "Wasn't planned."
"Bull shit! God, Matt. I thought—I thought that you calling me over, us spending time together." She cut herself off prematurely, trying to gather her thoughts so she wouldn't sound like she was throwing a childish temper tantrum. "I thought…" She began again, with a deep breath.
"I thought you were done with her, with all this. It was supposed to be over, it was supposed to be me."
Matt took a few steps towards her, "I really am sorry if I ever gave you that impression." He said honestly, and she looked at him as if he had struck her. "But you should have known, it'll never be over. It will always be her."
-x-
Tai was in the middle of a conversation with a particularly leggy brunette, one whose name he could not recall though she looked familiar enough. He really hoped he hadn't slept with her sister or something.
But that wasn't the point.
It was then that his eyes cut to a dark corner of the room, the party had long since winded down and it wasn't hard to spot a girl with glossy brown hair and beautiful doe eyes stumbling over chairs with a guy on her arm.
"Damn it." Tai hissed under his breath, he was just about to close the deal.
"What's that?" The girl purred, dragging a finger down his chest.
He squeezed his eyes shut, letting out an exasperated sigh through his nose. "Kills me to say this." He started. "But I gotta go." He gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek before heading in the opposite direction, the brunette calling after him.
He strided over, recognizing the raven haired fellow from the water polo team.
"Urameshi, what are you doing?" He all but demanded.
"Tai!" Mimi slurred, practically falling into a chair.
He'd be pissed at her drunkenness if it wasn't her birthday, he'd be hypocrite if he said he didn't have worst behavior on past occasions that were much lesser than a birthday.
"Hey, man. I was just tryna get her home." But the wicked glint in his dark indigo eyes told him otherwise.
Tai swallowed down the ire that was rising in him, it wouldn't do anyone any good if he punched the guy square in the nose tonight.
Plus he had a game in a few days and the coach had been all over him about acting less reckless this year. Some lecture about keeping up appearances and donors not liking controversy—blahblahblah.
It basically meant keep the indiscretions under the radar.
"Do you know Ikeda? He's such a nice guy." Mimi cooed.
"I'll bet." Tai muttered in annoyance.
"Look, I was just gonna drop her off to her dorm because obviously she can't take herself." He started. "And besides, Sora left with Ichijoji and I figured you would be—
"You figured wrong." Tai grunted, eyes flashing around the room for a familiar glint of blonde hair. .
"Alright well, why don't you just ask her what she wants. She told me she wanted—
"Keep talking Urameshi and you'll be spitting out your teeth for the next week." Tai growled, leaning down and putting his arms around Mimi's waist.
She wobbled up to her feet, falling into him in an instant.
"You know girls like her want this sort of thing! But I never took you for a guy who would steal someone else's girl for the night!" He called after him and Tai prayed he would shut up because he was on his last thread of patience.
He wished Matt was here, he would never admit it out loud but the blonde's presence always put him at ease. It was like just knowing Matt had his back made him feel like he was doing the right thing.
But the blonde had seemingly left without any goodbyes, not atypical for him.
Mimi tipped over to the side, Tai leaned over and grabbed her. "Screw this." He threw her arm around his neck and lifted her into his arms.
She borrowed her head into his chest, "You're a good friend and you're comfy." She yawned into him.
Tai held back a chuckle, even when he was royally annoyed with her he couldn't stop himself from cracking a smile.
"Lucky you're light as a feather, tachikawa." He said as they waited for a cab.
"And lucky it's my birthday." She said sleepily.
-x-
They got back to Mimi's dorm and after a lot of prodding and cajoling and begging, Mimi was able to locate her keys. Tai was acutely aware that he was currently the responsible one and it wasn't a position he particularly enjoyed.
But then she would give him that cute grateful smile or a little sigh of contentment and things would be kind of okay.
Once in a while, he wondered what that meant. Not in a romantic way, persey, but just if Mimi had this effect on everyone.
"Hey, you good from here?" He hung around the door frame.
She looked over her shoulder, trying to pull off her heels. "Well, yeah." She shrugged.
"Okay, so I'm gonna go then. Happy Birthday Meems." He walked in, dipping his head to place a light kiss on her cheek.
She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Thank you." She murmured, pulling him down a little closer.
Tai felt himself chuckle. "I'd never miss your party, princess." He said fondly.
"Not just for that, but for everything. You've been such a good friend to me, Tai." She buried her face into his shoulder.
"Anything for you, princess."
She nuzzled him softly. "Stay?" She asked, in a voice so small he barely heard it.
But he did hear it.
His eyes widened a little, "I'm not sure if I should do that, Meems." He told her gently, pulling out of her grasp.
He watched a soft blush rise in her cheeks. "I, I didn't mean like that." She tripped over her words a little, "I just mean...Sora's bed is empty."
He looked conflicted, all the possible what if's floating through his golden oak eyes. She was beautiful and she was kind and she was a whole miracle wrapped in a party dress and it was as if he had laid his eyes on her for the first time. And maybe he was drunker than he thought because he couldn't find a single reason why he shouldn't kiss her right here, right now.
She was as free as a bird, no longer tied to anyone but herself and he could see it.
But there were lines and bonds and ties that bind.
And he wasn't willing to do something they would all regret forever in a moment of sheer weakness.
Mimi and Matt were meant to be together, it was basically already written in the stars.
They were as fated as the sun and moon.
And he couldn't allow himself to feel differently, not even for a second, not even for a night.
"I think I should head to the loft." He said, sounding anything but sure.
And got up off the bed, "You have a look." She proclaimed.
He stepped back, she was too close-much too close. Any closer and she would be creating friction between them that would have unpredictable consequences.
"What look?"
"Like you think something might happen and you don't want it to." He was practically mesmerized by her answer.
Was she a mind reader.
But then, he had never been much good at poker-he had too many tells. And Mimi, he was sure, knew them all by now.
"I just think you're drunk off your ass, Meems." He cleared his throat.
She gave him a rueful pout. "Yeah, so?" She stomped her foot in a tantrum.
He chuckled, she was cute.
Too cute.
"Look, I'll sleep in Sora's bed, okay?" He offered.
A smile split her face. "Yay! Slumber party." She clapped her hands together.
"You sure don't take no for an answer, do ya, Tachikawa?" He nudged her.
"I mean I might have eventually, Taichi. But you give in too easily." She stuck her tongue out.
He shook his head. "Sleep, okay?" He took her by the shoulders, gently pushing her back into the bed.
She nodded, "Aye, Aye!" She saluted him in jest.
He laughed, "I'm gonna be sleeping in my boxers though, fair warning." He told her.
Her eyes widened, "What?" She stammered.
"What?" A lazy grin broke across his face. "You expect me to sleep in a dress shirt and slacks?"
Another heated blush rose from her neck. "I...no. I just, I didn't think about it." She admitted.
"Well, you'll get a pass for being inconsiderate since it's your birthday." He winked.
"I just love my birthday." She sighed with contentment, laying back down on her pillow.
He had only gotten as far as the light switch, when he heard her even breathing. And when he turned around again, she was already asleep.
He bent down and kissed her forehead. "Night Meems." He tucked the covers over her, watching her snuggle into them a bit closer.
He let out a sigh, maybe in relief, and went over to Sora's bed where he passed out as soon as his head hit the pillow.
-x-
Tai had planned to slip out of the room without anyone noticing, the girls dormitories was not a place he was unfamiliar with but it still wasn't really his style to be caught walk of shaming it out of there. Not that there was much shame in the walk considering he had passed out in Sora's bed after much insistence from the birthday princess that he stay and not leave her alone on her birthday. He had lost count of how many times the phrase had been used by Mimi to get just about everything she had wanted not just that day but practically all month.
Funnily enough, Mimi didn't really need a day to get what she wanted.
The smooth exit was anything but, because as soon as he was tiptoed into the hallway, coming up from the staircase was a familiar blonde and Tai inwardly groaned. He panickedly jiggled the doorknob, hoping he could disappear back inside before the girl saw him, but alas, the door was locked shut.
He was sure this was karmic punishment of sorts, because he had a raging hangover proportionate to an elephant standing on his head and he had to go to the practice field in an hour which meant he had to be showered, advil'd, breakfasted in that time and now he would be set back at least ten minutes and probably late to practice which meant his coach would have him running extra laps.
At all these thoughts reeling in his mind, he stood rooted outside of the Tachikawa/Takenouchi dorm room which made him easy prey for the blonde he wanted so desperately to avoid.
Catherine stopped in front of him, giving him an unimpressed one over. "Long night?" She arched an eyebrow, green eyes anything but amused.
He was a strict non repeater and this was why, sleep with a girl once and you can justify it as a one night stand. Twice, and they always, always think it's something more, that it 'meant something.'
"The longest." He gave her a charming smile, hoping that was enough for her.
"Tachikawa?"
Tai sighed, "We're friends, Cat." He felt awkward, standing in his wrinkled slacks from the night before, button down untucked and rolled at the sleeves.
Catherine hmph'd, "Whatever. You should know, she had her tongue down Ishida's throat last night, all hot and heavy, NC17 style." She blanched.
At the look on his face, a satisfied cheshire smile crossed her face. "Guess you didn't know?" She grinned. "You guys share more than an apartment now, huh?"
Tai clenched his jaw. "Watch it." He warned. "Whatever Mimi does with anyone else is her business, like I said we're friends. And I swear to God, Catherine, if you make this into something it's not—you will regret it."
"Oh Tai, don't threaten me with a good time." She purred into his ear, a finger sliding down his chest.
Tai moved out of her grasp, "I'm serious, nothing happened." He repeated.
"But Tai, I did see you sneaking out of the room like a squeaky little rat." She said innocently, eyelashes fluttering.
"I know it's hard for your pea sized brain to fathom, but a girl and a guy can sleep in the same room without ripping their clothes off." He spat.
"Sure they can, but not you." She shrugged.
"Just because we slept together doesn't mean you know me, blondie."
"Twice." She smiled. "Anyway, relax. Your little secret is safe with me, Taichi." She winked, before walking past him making a show of swaying her hips.
"Nothing happened!" He called after her in frustration.
-x-
His bleary eyes opened to the morning sun beaming in between cracks in his white blinds and Yamato wondered if he had even slept at all. All night he had tossed and turned and tried to turn off his own thoughts. Feeling as though there had been a feral cat trying to claw its way out of his chest. Hearing his own blood rushing in his ears as his stomach rolled into complicated knots, twisting and turning until he was sure there were balloon animals living inside him.
He had been grappling with the idea that tonight had been different, he could no longer categorize these occurrences as mistakes or shrug them off as meaningless drunken encounters. Mimi was not the girl for those things, not to him. And if there had ever been any indication of that, it had been his words to Zoe—letting her, as well as himself, know that none of this had ever been temporary. That it had never, ever been without meaning.
In his mind's eye, was a reel of everything that had happened since she had come back to Japan. Trying to wrap his brain around the fact that it had only been a few short months, not eternities or lifetimes as it felt. And suddenly, unaware of it happening, his life would always be defined as pre and post. That all the memories he held within him were forever tied to her in ways he was only beginning to understand.
So uncomplicated had it been when she lived a thousand miles away, a ghost on the other end of a phone call.
And yet, he was fulfilled in ways he had never been either—not with his music or with his work or even with his friends.
The idea of love and it being with her no longer as daunting or terrifying as it had been when he had first thought of it. Rapidly, that fear was being overshadowed by the idea that she would wake up one day and tire of him and his insecurities and his inability to make up his mind. His self destructive nature that led him to destroy any dredges of happiness in his life.
The very thought of her one day deciding that he was no longer worth her effort or her time and accustomed herself to the idea that friendship was all he was capable of and move on from this, whatever it was. Taking with her, her sunshine and her light and all of the beautiful things that illuminated his life.
Suddenly, he was overwhelmed with this feeling that she was slipping right through the cracks of his fingers like grains of sand or water from a faucet. And if he didn't act now, it might be too late and she might really be gone.
He thought again of the night before, his hands still tingling from the warmth of her body. And the fact that if they hadn't been interrupted, he would have certainly brought her back here and perhaps she would be waking up next to him. His heart sank into his stomach with the realization that there was actually nothing that would have made him feel more whole than her curled against him.
He had felt so trapped by the actuality of him and Mimi becoming an us, a we. He had once thought of how mundane their life might be if they actually dated, doing things that couples did—Matt and Mimi holding hands, Matt and Mimi going to the movies. The very idea of it had made him cringe, the suburbia of it all had him running for the hills.
Now, however, he realized that perhaps those things wouldn't be so bad. But more than that, he realized that life with Mimi could be a lot of things, but never mundane. Because while he wasn't sure what their future could hold, he could see her waking up beside him. He could see himself making her breakfast as she walked around in one of his old band shirts. He could see them clearing off the coffee table, him with his guitar strumming lightly, her with a pen and paper as she melodied lyrics.
Just the fantasy of it had him feeling light and new.
And just like that, he really couldn't wait to tell her.
He wanted her to know that he couldn't imagine his life without her, that anything prior to this had just been a denial of an irrevocable truth. That he was in love with her, he probably always had been. And all he really wanted was to make her happy, in any way that he could.
He toyed with the idea that it really might already be too late. Perhaps he had jerked her around one too many times and she no longer trusted him. It was very possible— possible, so possible that he really didn't even want to think about it. Because he knew that he took way too long to come to this conclusion and expecting her to hold on to her feelings while he had sorted out his was a lot to ask.
But Mimi was gracious and she was forgiving.
And it wasn't that he deserved her grace or forgiveness, but he hoped that she would give it to him anyway.
His fingers twitched for a cigarette, yet he hoped that resisting the impulse would be a silent step forward.
Afterall, she had always hated when he smoked.
-x-
Sora approached the rust-colored track layered in a turtleneck underneath her jacket, she had her hands stuffed in her pockets as her breath came out in puffs in the crisp December air. Just past three pm and the sun was already beginning to wane, the days seeming shorter and shorter with each passing moment.
Mimi's birthday had been fun and while she didn't mind the holidays either, the end of the year had always brought with it melancholy.
Her eyes followed a solitary figure around the bend, following the curvature of the white solid lines. She hung her elbows over the fence that encompassed the perimeter of the track and waited.
After one more lap around, he came to stand before her, clad in just a black long sleeves thermal and matching sweatpants. He pulled his earbuds from his ears and gave her a grin she was used to.
"Nice day for a run." She mentioned.
Tai ran a hand through his hair, "I was late to practice." He said sheepishly.
"Sleep in late?" She raised a brow.
"Something like that." He muttered.
HIs tone had caught her attention for the briefest of seconds, not enough to comment on. "How was the rest of the night?" She asked, acknowledging that she had ducked out early with her boyfriend.
Tai shrugged a shoulder, still on the opposite side of the fence. "It winded down." He wasn't sure if he should tell her he slept at their dorm.
He never really hid things from Sora, she was one of the bros. And while it might not go over well with Matt, Sora was also his best friend. But for some reason, he felt hesitant to mention it.
Maybe it was the spectacle that Catherine had made that made him want to forget about the whole thing. She had tainted it somehow, with her insinuation, and normally he didn't care about that sort of thing but it really bugged him.
"What about you?" He asked instead.
Sora tucked her hair behind her ear. "Fine." She hoped the light coat of blush appearing on her cheeks could be passed off as windburn.
Tai chuckled, "That bad, huh? Don't worry, I'll give Ichijoji some pointers, it'll be way bett—
Sora interrupted him with a shove to his shoulder, "Stop it." She gave him a glare.
He just gave her his most charming boyish grin.
"Honestly, I just felt really bad about leaving Mimi on her birthday." Sora continued. "I regretted it the second I left, she got back okay though...right?" She chewed her bottom lip in apprehension.
"Have you not been back to your room?" Tai asked, feeling his heart jump into his throat.
Sora shook her head, "I had to head to the library and finish an assignment, I was walking back when I saw you." She gave him a small smile.
Tai nodded, "Uh, yeah." He squirted water from his bottle into his mouth, his throat suddenly very dry. "She got back fine."
"I knew you'd make sure of it." Sora beamed.
When Sora said nothing else on the subject, asked no further questions, Tai had lost any real motivation to give the full story. To him, it just felt like an awkward thing to insert after the fact. Perhaps, if he had just been forthcoming from the beginning...but not when it would hang over them, Sora always left to wonder if he were leaving something out.
Besides, nothing happened.
"Are you okay?" Sora peered at him through concerned auburn eyes.
"Hm?" He glanced up.
It was as obvious to Sora that something was on his mind as it was to him. He had never been one to hide how he was feeling, he was usually overzealous and boisterous about it. Never scared or timid, but confident almost to the point of being brash. So it didn't occur to him that if he didn't want to discuss what happened earlier, he really should have put on a poker face.
"You seem preoccupied, is all." Sora shrugged, but didn't push.
When it came to Tai, she seldom had to push. She didn't want to, either. It wasn't their relationship to force things out of one another, it was the part of their dynamic she liked best.
The effortlessness of it all.
Tai's easy grin and his carefree demeanor and the way he was always able to take the edge off of a serious conversation, making hard subjects just a little easier to talk about.
He walked around through the opening of the fence, "Just something dumb." He stood shoulder to shoulder with her, well her head reaching his shoulders but still. "Not even worth talking about."
Sora fidgeted her hands out of her pockets. "Well, I understand." She said softly. "But you know we can talk about anything, right?" She glanced at him through the corner of her eye.
Tai nodded, "I know, Red." He bumped her with his shoulder.
-x-
The end scenes of Carrie were blaring from the tv when Yamato walked out into the living room. He glanced at it just in time for the pig's blood and he couldn't help but give a short laugh. The events that would follow did not bode well for the prom goers.
Tai and Sora were sprawled on the couch, kernels of popcorn scattered around as an empty bowl sat at Tai's feet.
Matt couldn't help but smile, they used to have this stupid tradition back in thier early days of high school where the three of them would rent a scary movie and laugh thier way through it on a Friday night.
Back when life wasn't about what party Tai had to be seen at that week or Sora's constant anxiety attacks about school work.
He put his bag down, shuffling his feet towards the couch. Sora wordlessly pulled her legs up to make room for him, now sandwiched between both boys.
"Dude, you just missed the best part." Tai nudged him over Sora.
Matt shrugged a shoulder, "We've only seen it seven hundred times." He said.
"Shhhhh!" Sora patted both their legs impatiently.
Once the movie ended and Carrie had sufficiently killed everyone and her literal mother, Sora sat back and gave a contented sigh. "Such a classic." She said wistfully.
"Sor, you gotta know you're the only chick that finds scary movies relaxing." Tai laughed.
"What? They mellow me out."
"Smoke a little weed, it'll give you the same effect." Matt teased. "And you won't even have to sit through two hours of Tai's screams."
"Except that one time." Tai shivered.
Matt winced, "Yeah, we don't talk about that time." He muttered.
"So, how are you?" Sora asked, folding her legs underneath her. "What were you doing holed up in your room while we watched your least favorite horror movie of all time?"
"Final Destination and all it's sequels are my least favorite." Matt corrected her. "Homework, studying. Stalling…" It was past sunset and as the hours passed his resolve weakened, he was actually so nervous to face her.
It was unlike him in so many ways, he absolutely hated it.
Sora began to grin, "Stalling, hm? Stalling what, exactly?" She asked him in that annoying way where she already knew the answer.
Sometimes he forgot how well Sora knew him.
Tai's attention perked up, he put his phone down and stared over at him.
"Might it possibly be going over to see a certain brunette whom you had your hands all over last night?" Sora smirked, eyebrow raised.
Matt felt the heat rising from his neck into his cheeks. "What the hell…" He murmured something unintelligible under his breath.
"Mimi didn't tell me, I actually haven't even seen her yet." Sora briefed him, "Tai here found out through the social grapevine aka his bed buddy Catherine."
Tai stiffened beside the redhead, hoping no one would notice how quiet he was being or how he had yet to tease Matt about the whole scenario. In truth, Catherine's name and the ordeal that transpired in the morning still had him feeling relatively uncomfortable.
Matt gave him a scowl, "The guy who never spends a night alone should really talk." He said darkly. "Where did you sleep last night, anyway?"
Tai felt a shiver go down his spine, it was a question he didn't really feel like answering right now. It would make things really awkward and he was in no mood.
Luckily, Sora was too caught up in the potential Mimato endgame situation happening to care. "Oh who cares about that, stop trying to change the subject!" She waved him off. "Are you going to make things official with Mimi or not! I mean, all this will they/won't they is making me break out into stress hives!" She complained.
Matt rubbed the back of his neck, "I'm going to talk to her, yeah." He admitted. "I...I want to be with her." He tested the words out on his tongue, hoping they sound less unsure when he said them to Mimi.
Sora squealed anyway, throwing her arms around his neck. "I'm so freaking happy!" She squeaked into his ear, so unlike her that he had to smile.
He loved seeing Sora happy, it made him feel like he was doing something right when she approved.
There was that mommy complex again…
"I'm not asking her to marry me, Sor." He pried her arms from around him. "Just... I don't know." He let out a sigh.
Sora frowned, elbowing Tai hoping it would nudge him to say something encouraging.
It did not.
"Look, I know things are complicated and messy but I really think they don't have to be." She said. "You two like each other, I would say love but the look on your face is already terrified so I won't, anyway, I just...she makes you happy, Matt." She finished softly.
He couldn't deny that, being around Mimi was like bathing in the sun. She made everything light and fun and better. But he wondered if she could say the same about him?
She was pure and perfect and when he was around her he wanted to be better. He felt better. BUt did he make her feel better? Or just burden her with his moodiness and lack of vulnerability.
"But would I be able to make her happy?" He had wondered this for so long but never really had the courage to say it out loud.
Sora's stared at him, a tenderness coating her already gentle eyes. "You already do, Matt." She put a on his shoulder.
"What? Nothing from the peanut gallery?" Though he said it in jest, he really was looking to Tai for his opinion.
Sora and Tai were like extensions of himself in ways, he relied on their judgements on his choices-at least the hard ones.
Tai was silent for a moment or two as both Sora and Matt stared at him intently.
Finally, "I say, it's about time." He grinned honestly. "Mimi's only been throwing hints at you for, I don't know, months?"
Matt let out a small laugh, half in relief and half in apprehension.
"Just don't fuck this up, man. I don't know if either of us can handle being Team Matt or Team Mimi much longer." Tai added, jabbing a thumb back and forth between himself and Sora.
"Team Mimi for life." Sora stuck her tongue out at Matt.
And both boys laughed.
"Same." Tai raised his hand.
Matt shook his head, "Me too." And it was true.
-x-
He didn't like riding his bike in the winter, especially when the roads were coated with some ice like this. Not because he was scared, in fact, he never felt more comfortable. But it was one of the few things he had promised his mother when he first got it, she had agonized over when she first found out during one of their phone calls. She lectured him about how dangerous it was then rattled off a random statistic (that he was sure she made up) about young men dying more from motorbike accidents than people did of heart attacks. After a long winded (mostly one sided) discussion on the subject, she had made him swear on her life that he wouldn't be reckless and grudgingly he did.
Never did she specify what reckless meant to her, but he knew that she might classify going out on ice slicked roads as exactly that. He wasn't really one for superstitions, her motherly dramatics of making him take an oath wasn't the part that gave him pause. It was more that she hardly ever asked anything of him in the first place, so the times she did, he felt a certain responsibility to uphold his word.
Regardless, he made it to campus in one piece, as he always did and parked his bike in front of the girls dorms.
He had only made it so far as the walkway when he ran into a familiar blonde coming out of said building.
He hadn't seen or heard from her since their exchange at Mimi's party, he hoped that she wasn't trying to find some sort of resolution because he was apprehensive enough as it was, he knew if he was stalled he would start losing his nerve.
"Hey." She came to stand a few paces away from him.
He bridged the gap in a few strides, "What's up?" He greeted.
"Funny seeing you here." Her tone let on that there was absolutely nothing funny about it, at least not to her.
"I guess." He muttered.
She nodded, "I get it, you love her." She brushed a couple of golden strands behind her ear.
He felt his shoulders tense, having anyone say those words out loud made him feel almost out of body. He was definitely not in denial anymore, but love felt so heavy and so loaded with expectations. It felt like too much all at once, though he supposed that was how their dynamic had always been. Living in absolutes, all or nothing, everything or nothing.
It wasn't the way he usually lived his life, it made him uncomfortable but that was probably a good thing in some ways.
Still he didn't respond, scuffing his shoe against the pavement and keeping his eyes off her.
"Okay…" She said in understanding, "I thought we were friends, but I was wrong again."
"We're friends, Zoe." He relented. "But I owe her my loyalty, especially now." So much of their disagreements stemmed from his indiscretions with Zoe and he just wanted space from the blonde because he really wanted to show Mimi that he was prioritizing her.
"Not that it's reciprocated." She scoffed.
Matt pulled a hand through his hair, "Look, sorry about the way things turned out, alright?" He hated apologizing, mostly because he felt like their arrangement was supposed to be self explanatory, still he did it anyway so he could find his way out of this conversation.
"Whatever." She let out a small snort.
Matt tipped his head to her before turning his back.
"She slept with Tai, you know!"
The words rang in his ears as he felt them echo around him, a thousand ton anvil falling on his head.
He spun around, jaw ticking in anger because of the lengths this girl was willing to go to get some kind of revenge. "You're twisted for saying something like that." He spun around, he knew he should have let it go and continued walking away.
But he just couldn't.
Zoe narrowed icy blue eyes, "It's true, Cat saw him leaving her room this morning." She persisted, a sick satisfaction washing over her as the words tumbled from her lips.
Matt's eyes widened, "You're lying." It was feeble and hollow.
Because the gears were already turning in his head, the fact that he hadn't heard from Mimi all day. Tai's impenetrable reluctance when prodded about where he had spent the night, when normally the brunette was the first to brag about his latest conquest over breakfast.
He didn't want it to make sense, he wanted to be so sure that it was a ploy to get him back. He wanted so badly to believe that neither Tai nor Mimi would ever do that to him and yet…
A slow smile spread across her face, "I know you believe me." She shrugged a shoulder. "Sorry I had to be the one to tell you, but you know they would never own up to it."
HIs head was spinning, he felt like throwing up. There was a part of him that was so incredibly angry he was sure he could have punched through a wall. BUt there was another part that was shocked into disbelief, because the idea that Tai and Mimi could have ever done something like that behind his back was unimaginable to him.
He wished he had more faith in them, in himself, in their friendships because it would have been so much easier to rebuke her.
She reached him, putting a hand on his shoulder in some show of sympathy.
He said nothing, just shrugged off her hands before walking in the opposite direction.
Mimi would never even know he had been there.
-x-
A/N: YES, AN UPDATE. Just a little something to help through the quarantine. I know it's been a year, but in that time I had a baby and he's now 8months old lol, so i've been kinda busy. That being said, I don't really have much time to write these days in general and even less time to edit and stuff. So I'm gonna post this and hope you guys like it as it's the third version of the same chapter. Sorry if the editing isn't great, I'll go through it again tomorrow and repost if it's terrible.
I'm so sorry I won't be doing review replies at the end of this chapter, I know I didn't last time either but I really just won't ever get this posted if I don't do it now.
I love you guys, I really hope you like this update please let me know what you think! I hope and pray that you're all safe and healthy during these uncertain and unprecedented times. All my love!
Song is Where did you sleep last night by Nirvana.