"It's rather boring today, don't you think?" England asked France during one of the EU meetings.
"Hmm, I wouldn't say boring." France said as he watched Germany yelling at Greece.
"But it is rather quiet without some of the younger nations here." England said, taking a sip of tea.
"It's a nice break, I will admit." France replied, frowning at England. "You know, drinking too much of that stuff will make your teeth turn brown."
"Gosh, I never knew that." England replied sarcastically. "It's not like I don't brush my teeth every single day of my life."
"It is important to keep up with ones looks, Angleterre." France scolded. "Why, a smile is one of the most noticeable features of one's face. One must keep their smile clean and shining if they wish to attract another mouth to their own."
"Pervert." England scoffed. "Although I agree that dental hygiene is important, I doubt anyone takes it so far as to clean their teeth to the point of obsession. And certainly not for the reasons you suggest."
"I'm afraid that you're wrong, mon ami." France said with a smirk. "I know for a fact that America is obsessed with how his teeth look."
"America?" England asked in surprise. "He cares about his looks?
"But of course. He wasn't only your colony, I'll have you know." France said with a smug look. "It is the French in him that makes him look so nice, don't you think? Why, he might have your eyebrows if I hadn't got there in time."
"Shove off, my eyebrows are fine." England snapped.
"If you say so." France sniggered. "But back to the point. America smiles a lot more than most of the other countries, and has a very large smile. It would only make sense that he makes sure to keep them perfect. In fact, Americans are often known to think poorly of people who have crooked or discolored teeth. They spend thousands of dollars at a time to straighten, whiten, and clean their teeth each year. It's actually rather nice that they take their dental health so seriously."
"So that's the reason his teeth blinds us whenever he smiles?" England asked, rolling his eyes.
"Oui. He told me himself." France said.
"Wait, why would he tell you something like that?" England asked, suddenly getting suspicious.
"Why wouldn't he tell me something like that? After all, I am his favorite big brother." France laughed, wiggling his eyebrows.
"AS IF, SNAIL BREATH!" England shouted, taking France by the neck.
"SAYS THE ONE WITH THE UNIBROW!" France chocked out, smacking England over the head.
"CHEESY PERVERT!"
"FORMER DELINQUENT!"
"NARCISSISTIC FROG!"
"BLACK SHEEP OF EUROPE!"
"Um, maybe I should come back later?" A voice said from the door. The nations looked over, and saw a slightly red faced America standing sheepishly in the doorway. He awkwardly gestured to the papers in his hand. "My boss wanted me to drop off some paperwork for England and France, but I see that their busy so…"
"How long have you been there?" England squeaked.
"Awhile." America said, backing out the door. "Sorry to interrupt. I just remembered I had an appointment. Bye." And with that, America rushed out the room.
"What was that all about?" Germany muttered to himself. Meanwhile, England was beating the crap out of France for not telling him America was in the room.
A/N: America is not used to people calling him their little brother. Anyways, Americans are known to be OBSESSED with the state of their teeth. Studies show that Americans actually pay more attention to teeth than any other facial feature on the face.