A/N: So, I'm not sure if this needs a warning or not, but I'm putting one up just in case. This chapter is dealing with panic attacks. I will be going into detail. If you suffer from panic attacks, and are easily triggered by reading things with high stress, please proceed with caution.
Alfred sighed as he walked into his hotel room, and slowly shut the door behind him. He put the suit case down by the door, and ran his hands over his face tiredly. As always, the meeting had been long, loud, and exhausting. To make matters worse, he hadn't had a chance to get any sleep, as the meeting had taken place an hour after his plane had landed. So, he had literally been up for 48 hours without a wink of sleep, and at the moment, he was running on ten cups of coffee and a prayer.
As he walked into the room, he took his tie off, and threw it on the bed, along with his jacket. He walked into the bathroom, and glanced at his reflection. Too put it bluntly, he looked like shit. He had bags under his eyes, his hair, while not messy, had a dull look to it. His eyes, usually bright and full of laughter, looked almost hollow. He also looked a little pale, but Alfred knew why that was. It was from being locked in an office in the white house, doing god knows how much paper work, hardly seeing the sun at all. This irked Alfred a bit, because he really liked how he looked with a tan. To make things worse, he had been having a constant stomach ache, due to all the turmoil in the white house, due to things being unstable.
Sighing, Alfred took off his suit, (because fuck suits), and threw on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, and flopped onto the hotel bed, and shut his eyes. Finally, he could finally get some shut eye. Just as he started to doze off, his cell phone started to ring. Swearing loudly, he picked it up, and without even opening his eyes to check the caller ID, answered it.
"Hello, this is Alfred." He said with the best cheerful voice he could muster. "What can I do for ya?"
"You could sound a little less cheerful." Arthur grumbled. "I have some bad news."
"Oh, great." Alfred replied sarcastically. "Just what I wanted to hear. Is the world ending?"
"No, but I saw on the news that someone else in the white house quit, so you should be expecting another stomach ache." Arthur said sympathetically.
Alfred grumbled, then sighed. "Ok, thanks for the head up."
"Take it easy." Arthur said, then hung up the phone. Alfred sighed, and tossed his phone back on the bed table, and silently cursed his entire life as he tried to get back to sleep. Just as he closed his eyes, his phone rang again. This time, Alfred cracked open an eye, and silently willed the small device to explode. When that didn't work, he picked it up.
"Hello?" Alfred asked politely.
"Alfred, is that you?" His secretary cried in desperation. "It just doesn't end! We keep getting paper work! I don't know what to do with it all. Most of it is just complaints and stupid crap! Oh god, I'm tearing my hair out here! When are you getting back?" She cried hysterically. "The boss man keeps coming by, looking for you!"
Alfred briefly considered screaming into pillow under his head, then deciding that would be impractical, sighed.
"Mary, I thought I sent a memo to the boss telling him where I was." He said.
"I'm sure you did, but do you really think that that guy reads his own e-mail?" Mary scoffed.
"Just tell him I'm in China right now. You know, for a world meeting?" Alfred said, his eye twitching.
"I tried, but the guy is convinced that meeting isn't until tomorrow, but it is tomorrow where you are, and oh god, I didn't call in the middle of your meeting did I?" She asked nervously.
"No, but you did wake me up. It's midnight here. Alfred said tiredly.
"Oh, I'm sorr-, uh, hold on a second." Mary said. Alfred heard shuffling in the background. "Uh, the boss man is here now. He's demanding to talk to you about the quitting."
At that, Alfred felt something snap in his mind. He started to laugh. First it started with a giggle, then he just lost it, howling at the top of his lungs.
"Uh, Alfred, are you ok?" Mary asked in concern.
"You know what?" Alfred said, when he controlled his laughter a bit. "No, I'm not ok. I'm tired because I haven't slept in two days, I'm stressed to the point that I feel ill all the time, and the boss keeps sending us all this shit to work on that isn't even important, and NOW he wants to talk to me about a quitting that I had no control over? AT FUCKING MIDNIGHT?!"
"Um, yes?" Mary said in an unsure tone.
"Well you know what?" Alfred said with a sweet tone. "You can tell him to go fuck himself. He doesn't own me like his fucking company's. I'm going off the grid. If you get fired for this, I'll have a new job for you by tomorrow."
"Wait, Alfred!" Mary cried into the phone desperately. "Let's talk this ove-!" But Alfred hung up the phone with a chuckle, then calmly walked over to the window, opened it, and threw his phone out of it. For some reason, he felt an odd sense of calm. Quietly, he walked over to the bathroom, got back dressed in his suit, repacked all his things, and left the hotel. He just picked a direction, and started to walk. He didn't know what he was doing, but it felt right.
For about an hour, he walked, not looking where he was going, or who was around him. It felt oddly liberating. But as he walked into an alleyway he found himself at a dead end. He just stared at the wall in front of him for a second, before the realization of what he had just done struck him. He had literally just said "Fuck you" to his boss, potentially gotten a woman fired, destroyed his phone, had gotten lost in an unfamiliar country, surrounded by people whose language he couldn't speak, (He had never bothered to learn Chinse), and had no idea what to do.
"Oh shit." Alfred whispered. He felt his bags fall from his hands from shock as he leaned against one of the walls. "Oh SHIT!" Alfred yelled as he pulled at his hair. "What the FUCK did I just do!? Aw man, I'm so FUCKED!" America slowly slid down the wall, still clutching his hair and his breathing started to pick up.
"No, no, no, NO, NO!" America repeated, rocking back and forwards. He started to breath faster. Oh god, he had never done something like this before. What did bosses do when counties went crazy? How bad was his punishment going to be? He just lost Mary's job! Hell, did he just lose his? He was a fucking idiot! How was he going to get home? He couldn't breathe. Why the hell couldn't he breath?!
He suddenly started to gasp for air. It burned to breath. As he started to try to catch his breath, he slowly realized that he was light headed. He briefly wondered why that was. Just as he felt himself falling forwards, he felt a pair of hands on his shoulders. The last thought he had was wondering if someone was calling his name.
LINEBREAK
Alfred woke slowly. Someone was shaking him by the shoulders, and calling his name. Alfred was a little bit irked. Why was someone trying to wake him up. He was just having the best nap. Wait a second…why was he lying on the ground? What the hell? This wasn't his bed! Opening his eyes, he was very confused to see Ivan's worried face above him.
"Ivan?" Alfred asked in confusion as he sat up. "Dude, what happened?"
"I was hoping you could tell me that." Ivan said awkwardly. Just then, everything that happened to Alfred hit him.
"Oh, It's, um, not important." Alfred said off handily. Great, his arch enemy had just seen him fucking faint in an alleyway. This day couldn't get any worse.
"Alfred." Ivan said seriously. Alfred flinched a bit at the tone. "I have been alive far longer than you have. I can tell when someone is lying to me. Plus, the fact that you were crying and having a panic attack in the middle of China tells me that this isn't "Nothing", as you put it."
"Crying?" Alfred asked, putting his hand up to his eyes. Sure enough, he felt tear marks down his face. Groaning, Alfred put his head in his hands in embarrassment. "Please fuck off."
"You know, if you had said that in the right state of mind, I would be more than happy too." Ivan said with a frown. "But right now, I don't want you by yourself."
"How did you even find me?" Alfred asked, looking warily up at the Russian man. "I don't even know where I am right now."
"I'm not surprised." Ivan said with a scoff. "I was just walking out of a store near here, when I saw you walking down the road with your bags, and you were spaced out. As in you looked like, how does the expression go, like the lights were on, but no one was home. I decided to follow you." As he helped Alfred up, he added, "As for where we are, we are about ten minutes from the building where the meeting was held.
"Oh." Alfred answered lamely. There was an awkward beat, then Alfred cleared his throat.
"Uh, well, thank you for the help…" Alfred said as he picked up his bags, "But I'm afraid I have to find another hotel to sleep in tonight."
"Alfred, what happened?" Ivan asked, stepping in front of Alfred to prevent the smaller man from fleeing. "It takes a lot for you to break down."
"It's none of your damn business." Alfred snapped, trying to step around Ivan. Ivan sighed, then grabbed Alfred's arm.
"Alfred." Ivan sighed in exasperation. "I just want to help you."
"Look, all I want is to go to bed." Alfred said, slightly deflating a bit. "It's been a long day. I don't want to talk about it, ok?" he muttered, not looking at Ivan. Ivan didn't say anything for a second, then sighed. He let go of Alfred's arm. Alfred gave a sigh of relief, and just as he was about to walk away, Russia stepped in front of him again. Growing a little irked, America raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"
"Have you had anything to eat?" Ivan asked. Taken aback by the question, Alfred blinked in surprise. Then he shook his head.
"Uh, no. Now that I think about it, I haven't had anything sense I was on the plane." Alfred said in surprise, just realizing how hungry he was.
"Hmm." Ivan hummed in amusement. "And just how were you going to buy something to eat or find a hotel room when I know for a fact you can't speak Chinese?"
"I, uh, shut up." Alfred growled, turning red from embarrassment.
"A witty response." Ivan teased. "Look, I'll buy you dinner, and help you get a hotel. Unlike you, I know a decent amount of Chinese." At this, Alfred frowned.
"Just what are you planning, commie?" Alfred asked, looking suspiciously at Ivan.
"For once in your life, just trust me." Ivan said, rolling his eyes. For a moment, Alfred studied Ivan, then he nodded.
"Alright, but only because I'm too tired to argue." Alfred said, and he followed Ivan out of the alleyway.
For a few minutes, they walked in silence. Alfred was too tired to start a conversation. Alfred started to space out again, when he felt Ivan tap him on his shoulder. Blinking, he looked over at Ivan, who pointed at the restaurant in front of him. Looking up, he frowned.
"I didn't even think any of the restaurants where open around this time." Alfred mumbled as Ivan pushed him into the place.
"It's the city." Ivan chuckled. "Something was bound to be open."
"I guess." Alfred said with a yawn. They made their way over to a table, where Alfred sat down, and Ivan went to order their food. Alfred looked around bored, then stared out the window, letting his mind wander. He still had no idea what he was going to do to get himself out of this mess. But after having a complete mental breakdown, he couldn't say he didn't feel better, but he did feel drained. As he pondered his options, Ivan came back with their meals.
"You know," Alfred said with a weak laugh, "When I come to China, usually I don't go out to eat KFC."
"Well, they were the only thing open." Ivan said with a shrug, handing Alfred his food, and sitting down in front of him. Alfred started to eat half heartily, which made Ivan frown.
"Is something wrong with the food?" Ivan asked.
"Huh, no, it's fine." Alfred said, startled. "It's just reminding me of home…" Alfred said, trailing off as he turned pale. With a sigh, he pushed his food away with a shake of his head. "I guess it's not very appetizing right now."
"Did something bad happen at your place?" Ivan asked, getting more concerned.
"No worse than the usual." Alfred shrugged. "All this changing of political spots is bad for my stomach."
Ivan studied Alfred for a minute, then sighed. "Alfred, did you do something stupid?"
"Wow, right to the point." Alfred joked weakly. "How'd you guess?"
"You only truly panic when shit hits the fan." Ivan pointed out. "The only times I've seen you really freak out is at the beginning of the Revolutionary war, all throughout the civil war, the day the Great Depression started, Peral harbor, and the Cuban missile crisis."
"Wow, thanks for bringing all those warm and fuzzy memories up." Alfred grumbled.
"So, what did you do?" Ivan asked as he munched on his food.
"Hmm, well, if I had to summarize it," Alfred mused, "I've been having stomach aches for a while now, I've been overworked over nothing, I haven't slept in two days, I haven't had anything to eat in the last 24 hours before this meal, I got a call from my P.A that my boss wanted to talk to me over crap, I told him to go fuck himself, declared that I was basically running away from home, threw my phone out the window, ran out of my hotel, got lost, and fainted in an alleyway." Alfred said in a monotone voice.
Ivan stared at Alfred for a second. There was a moment of silence as Ivan absorbed this information. Then Ivan started laughing hysterically. He literally had to cling to the table so he didn't fall out of his seat. Alfred glowered as the Russian man rolled around in his seat for a good 5 minutes, before he was able to control himself.
"Are you done yet?" Alfred snarled as Ivan composed himself.
"Alfred, that's it?" Ivan asked as he wiped tears from his eyes, still chuckling. "I was really worried that something really bad had happened to you."
"Wow, thanks for making light of my problems." Alfred huffed. "Asshole."
"Look, I'm not trying to belittle your problems." Ivan said sympathetically. "It's more the fact that told your boss to go fuck himself that I found really funny. And throwing your phone out the window? That's just icing on the cake. But to be honest, most of us at the meeting yesterday were really concerned about you. You haven't really been yourself for a while."
"I just can't take it anymore." Alfred griped. "It's a circus back home. Everyone is quitting or is being fired, there's a scandal almost every day, I'm a fucking laughing stock, and I've been stuck in an office for over four weeks." Suddenly, tears started falling down Alfred's face. "I just don't want to go home. I mean, I know this will probably blow over, but what if something goes wrong before the next election? What if some law gets passed that hurts people, after I've come so far in trying to give my people equality? What if my country starts to become radical? Even at the worst times in my history, I at least had people in the government that were always sort of trusted by the people. And they had brains in their heads! But now?! I don't even know who's even going to be in the government next week! I feel like I've lost control. Like I'm being bought out!"
Ivan sighed. "Alfred, these are legitimate concerns, and maybe due to the fact that the government isn't rock solid like it usually is for you, you may be having a hard time staying stable, but you'll make it through. Most older counties have already gone through something like this is history. Hell, you may have had similar things happen to you in the past and just forgot about it."
"Hmm." Alfred agreed glumly.
"Alfred, it could be a lot worse." Ivan sighed. He handed America a napkin to wipe his face. "At least your people are aware that they're unhappy and not just following like blind sheep. At least your people are patriotic, at least they are still proud to be a citizen of your country."
"Like you could take away American pride." Alfred hiccupped laughed.
"Ah, see, you're already better." Ivan said happily. "You were sounding like a hormonal teenage girl there for a moment.
At that, Alfred started to laugh. "Yeah, I guess I was."
"So, why did you just blow up like that?" Ivan asked, sipping his soda. "I mean, it's not like you to blow up at stress. Usually you just laugh it off."
"I don't know." Alfred sighed as he picked at the fries on the table. "I guess I just let it build up, to the point where I couldn't hold back anymore."
"Hmm, I know the feeling." Ivan said with a nod. "You have to let go every now and then so you don't end up doing that."
"Well, it's just that I thought that ignoring the issue would make it go away." Alfred grumbled. "I know it doesn't work, but it makes it easier to do day to day things."
Ivan thought for a moment, then chuckled. "I think you just need something to eat, and a good night's rest to make you feel better. I find that those things make people a little more emotionally stable. Seeing as you had neither of those things, it's actually not surprising that you lashed out a bit."
Alfred shrugged, but didn't answer as he nibbled at his food. Ivan stole one of Alfred's fries, and asked, "How old are you now?"
"242." Alfred said automatically.
"No, I know that." Ivan laughed. "I meant physically.
"Oh." Alfred said with a blink. "Well, I think I'm around 19."
With that, Ivan chuckled. "I see, it's just teenage rebellion." Then he stopped, then frowned. "Wait a second, that's how old you were during the cold war?"
"Yeah?" Alfred said in confusion. Russia sighed.
"To think, a brat stopped my world domination plans." Ivan said with a shake of his head.
"Wow, rude." Alfred said in mock irritation.
"Only towards you." Ivan shot back. Then becoming a bit more serious, he asked, "So, have you figured out how you're going to get out of hot water with your boss?"
"No, I haven't." Alfred snorted. "I'm so tired I don't even think I could count to ten, let alone come up with an excuse for what I did."
"Then don't lie." Ivan suggested. "Tell them you're being over worked, and that you need a vacation."
"If I even have a job when I get back." Alfred whined as he rested his head on the table. "Knowing the boss, my desk is probably already empty."
"But you're a personification." Ivan asked. "Aren't you essential at the white house?"
"Aw, don't give me that crap." Alfred said, raising his head and glaring at Ivan. "You know better than anyone how easy it is for our bosses to throw us out for a while. Best case scenario, I'm out of a job, and on my own for the next few years. The higherups will most likely still send me to meetings and stuff, but they'll send someone with me to keep an eye on me." Groaning, Alfred ran his hand through his hair. "What a pain in the ass."
Ivan chuckled. "At least it's only for a few years."
Suddenly, Alfred gasped, and stood up suddenly. "AW CRAP!" Ivan looked up alarmed.
"What's wrong?" Ivan asked as Alfred start to freak out again.
"Remember that I said that I told my boss that I was running away? I broke my phone! I'm in the middle of China! I wasn't acting myself. Now I'm meeting with you when, no offense, everyone in my government is suspicious of the Russians meddling with government! How the hell do you think the higher ups are going to view this!" Alfred asked, sitting back down, looking pale again.
"If you throw up on me, I'll kill you." Ivan warned. "And as for your government, it's not like they have tabs on us at all times. What's going to happen? The FBI is going to come crashing into a KFC in China? Think of the nightmare that would cause them." Ivan chuckled. "Calm down. Just use my phone to contact them." As Ivan pulled out his phone, Alfred laughed.
"Yeah. You're right. I'm sorry, I'm just really scattered brained today." Alfred said as he took the phone and dialed his offices number. After a few rings, the phone picked up.
"Who is this?" Mary asked crossly. "Whoever you are, you shouldn't have this number.
"Hello, it's me, Alfred." Alfred said tiredly.
"Alfred! Oh, thank god!" Mary said in relief. Then getting angry, she shouted, "JUST WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU ARE THINKING?!" Making Alfred wince away from the phone. "HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ME ALONE TO DEAL WITH THE BOSS! I SWEAR, I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO LOSE MY JOB! DO YOU KNOW HOW PISSED OFF I AM AT YOU RIGHT NOW?!"
"Oh, she sounds feisty." Ivan said with a smirk. "I like her."
Throwing Ivan a glare, Alfred turned his attention back to his call. "Mary, look, I'm sorry. I kind of just snapped. I didn't mean for this to get out of hand." Alfred said with a nervous laugh.
"At least you called back." Mary huffed. "But why aren't you calling from your phone?"
"I kind of threw my phone out the window." Alfred said awkwardly. For a moment, there was silence, then he heard a strangled noise on the other side of the phone.
"Mary, are you ok?" Alfred asked in concern.
"Alfred, I swear to god, I didn't have grey hair on my head when I met you." Mary said finally. "Where are you? We sent some guys to get you at the hotel, but you weren't there, and the hotel said you checked out early. They had thought something bad had happened to you."
"Wait, you had people watching my hotel?" Alfred asked, sounding shocked.
"Alfred, we always send people to keep an eye on you." Mary snorted. "I can't believe you didn't even notice."
"I can take care of myself!" Alfred argued.
"Like tonight?" Mary countered, shutting him up. "Look," Mary sighed, "Where are you?"
"I'm not really sure. I kind of got lost walking around the city" Alfred said.
"You're hopeless Alfred." Ivan laughed.
"You stay out of this." Alfred replied.
"Alfred, who's with you?" Mary asked, sounding concerned.
"Oh, it's just-" Alfred started to say, but saw Ivan shaking his head frantically. "Um, I just hanging with a friend.
"America, who are you hanging out with?" Mary asked sounding confused.
"Just a friend. He found me passe-," Alfred stopped, thinking that it probably wouldn't be a good idea to say that he had passed out in an alleyway, so he corrected himself. "I mean, he saw me passing by, and stopped to hang out." Alfred corrected himself.
"Alfred, you don't know anyone in China." Mary deadpanned, making Alfred start to sweat. "Alfred, what are you hiding? I have been your P.A. for thirty years, you can't hide shit from me."
"Uh, he forced me to eat food. No, wait, that came out wrong." Alfred stumbled, making Ivan face palm. "What I meant to say is that he dragged me out of an alleyway, and gave me his phone to call you guys."
"Alfred," Mary said slowly, "Did someone kidnap you?"
"Give me the phone." Russia said, looking annoyed. "Alfred, you suck at giving explanations."
"ALFRED, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!" Mary yelled.
"Dude, take the phone, I just made it worse!" Alfred panicked as Ivan snatched his phone back.
Just as Ivan grabbed the phone, the phone went dead. They both looked at the phone for a moment, then America went pale.
"дерьмо." Ivan said.
"I'm so sorry." Alfred sputtered. "Crap, the FBI is going to kill me for this. And Mary, she's going to be so pissed off." Sighing Alfred slumped in his chair. "Today is by far the worst day ever."
Ivan looked out the window, and just chuckled as he pocketed his phone. "Hey Alfred, when was the last time you did something fun?"
"Huh?" Alfred asked in bewilderment. "It's been a while, why?" Ivan put on a sweet smile, and shook his head.
"Do you want to play a game?" Ivan asked as he stood up, confusing Alfred even more.
"Dude, you aren't making any sense." Alfred said, getting irritated. "I swear, every time I think I know you, you throw me a curve ball. This is no time to be playing games!"
"On the contrary," Ivan said happily, pulling out a mask out of his pocket, and putting it over his face. "this is the perfect time to play a game. Thank goodness, I didn't wear any of my usual clothing today and just my casual clothing. And that this part of town doesn't have any cameras. That would have been bad if they had a way to identify me."
"Ivan, what are you doing?" Alfred asked in concern.
"Oh, I'm just playing the part of the kidnapper." Ivan said with glint in his eyes as he grabbed Alfred's arm, and dragged him out of the shop. "But let's not get the fast food place involved. That would be rude. Thankfully, my car can't be tracked back to me, or my government, so that's the car I'm kidnapping you in." He said cheerfully as Alfred jaw hit the floor.
"Ivan, have you lost your god damn mind!?" Alfred squeaked. "Are you trying to get me in even more trouble?!"
"I'm afraid that there isn't much time to explain things, as I saw your FBI men trying to surround the building. Looks like your friend squealed on us and they found us somehow." Ivan chuckled as he pulled Alfred down the street. "I don't think they saw my face, because we were in a hard spot to be seen. But the moment they know it's me, we're both going to be in hot water."
"Can't we just explain what happened?!" Alfred asked desperately. "It's not like kidnapping me is the best idea in the world."
"But what's the fun in that?" Ivan asked, giving Alfred an amused look. "Plus, I can't be seen with you as you said. My government would be pissed off at me for causing trouble. And I don't think your FBI men would be willing to listen to me, they would be a little more trigger happy."
"But, I mean, it's pretty hard to believe that I would get kidnapped by an unarmed man." Alfred tried to point out.
"Who ever said I was unarmed?" Ivan laughed as they reached his car. He then pulled out a gun from his pocket.
"Why am I not surprised." Alfred sighed Ivan opened the passenger door for Alfred.
"YOU TWO, STOP!" A voice yelled, and they looked behind them to see a group of men in suits running towards them from down the street with guns in their hands.
"Ah, it's seems that the FBI has caught up with us." Ivan said, pushing Alfred into the car. Then he hopped in the driver's side, and after locking the doors, quickly turned on the car, slammed his foot down on the accelerator, and screeched out onto the street like a bat out of hell.
"Oh Christ." Alfred said turning green, as Ivan weaved through traffic recklessly. "I know you're "Kidnapping me", but could you try not to actually kill me?"
"If we're going to lose the police, we need to get as far away as possible." Ivan pointed out, as he turned a sharp corner, making Alfred squeak as they almost hit another car.
"Oh, don't be such a baby." Ivan said, rolling his eyes. "I'm a great driver."
"Eyes on the road, hot shot!" Alfred snapped.
Suddenly, shots rang out behind them, and Ivan laughed. "Looks like they caught up to us already. I'm impressed."
"Of course, the FBI doesn't hire just anyone." Alfred grumbled.
"Should I shoot back?" Ivan wondered with a frown.
"DUDE!" Alfred shouted angerly.
"Ok, ok, sheesh, I just want to make it believable." Ivan grumbled. "You better hold on, we're going downtown."
"Are you trying to get into a wreck! There is too much traffic there!" Alfred argued. "Plus, won't it be bad if we run someone over or innocent people get caught in a fire fight?"
"They probably won't fire again, and traffic will be lighter because of how late it is." Ivan said, glancing back at the black car following them. He could see two men in the car, and they both looked pretty pissed off. "They won't put the public at risk. I, on the other hand," Ivan said with smirk as he ran a red light, "Have no problem using that to my advantage."
"Oh god, I'm going to be sick." Alfred groaned as he put his hands over his eyes. "How the hell did this happen to me? I'm never leaving my hotel again during a business trip again if this is what happens to me."
"I'm sure your boss will be happy to hear that." Ivan joked as he grabbed his gun. "Take the wheel for a second."
"Wait, WHAT?!" Alfred yelled, staring at Ivan in disbelief as Ivan rolled down his window.
"Take the wheel, I'm going to shoot out their tires." Ivan said. Alfred grabbed the wheel, and panicked as he tried to keep the car from crashing into a group of people crossing the street, who jumped out of their way. He heard Ivan shoot two shoots, and heard a screech and a satisfied laugh from Ivan.
"Bullseye!" Ivan said as he took the wheel back. After Ivan saw the horrified look on Alfred's face, he added, "They're fine. I didn't hit them, just the tires." He assured.
"Look, can we please get out of the city?" Alfred begged. "I don't anyone getting hurt."
"Sure, it's getting too crowded anyway." Ivan agreed, and pulled onto one of the highways. As they sped down the highway, Ivan laughed when he saw they had shaken off their pursuers. "This reminds me of the Cold war."
"Did you kidnap people a lot during the cold war?" Alfred asked with a frown.
"I'm not allowed to answer that question." Ivan said with a smirk.
"I need a drink." Alfred said, his eye twitching. "This is at least number five on the list of the worst days ever for me."
"Just number five?" Ivan asked with a chuckle.
"I don't even know how to respond to that." Alfred sighed, as he shut his eyes, suddenly feeling very tired.
Noticing this, Ivan sighed. "Look, why don't you get some sleep. You look like you're going pass out at any second.
"Yeah, that doesn't sound like a bad idea." Alfred mumbled. After a few minutes, he was out cold.
LINEBREAK
Alfred woke up to a bunch of yelling. Annoyed, Alfred cracked open an eye, only to see a bunch of cops yelling in Chinse in front of him, and a bunch of guns pointed in his direction. Panicking, (he had been doing that a lot tonight), he tried to back up, only to notice that he had an arm around his chest, holding him up and preventing him from moving. He looked up, and saw Ivan with a gun to his head, yelling back at the cops in Chinese. Noticing that he was awake, Ivan look down and winked, then looked back up to keep an eye on the cops.
"Well, I'll give this to you Alfred, you sleep like the dead." Ivan said in amusement.
"What the hell is going on?" Alfred asked.
"Well, it's been about two hours sense you fell asleep." Ivan said quietly, so that only Alfred could hear him. "About ten minutes ago, the cops caught up with us, and shot out my tires. We came to a halt on this bridge, and I dragged you out of the car, and put a gun to your head. Don't worry, I have the safety on. But they don't that. I think they thought you were knocked out. We've been yelling at each other for about five minutes. I'm surprised you didn't wake up sooner. You must be more tired than you thought. But it helps make it look like a real kidnapping."
"Great." Alfred said sarcastically. "And just how do you plan to get yourself out of this one?"
"Like this. Oh, and just a bit of advice, act scared as possible." Ivan said, and he suddenly pushed Alfred towards the cops, jumped over the side of the bridge, and fell out of sight. Alfred stared at the spot that Ivan disappeared for a second in disbelief, then ran over to the side of the bridge, and to his horror, saw a fifty foot drop into a river.
He suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder, and he jumped, and spun around to see a concerned cop looking at him. He asked him something Chinese, which Alfred frown.
"Uh, sorry, I speak English." Alfred said.
"I said, are you ok?" The officer asked again, this time in English.
"Uh, yeah, I'm ok." Alfred said, closing his eyes. "Just really tired."
"That's understandable." The officer said sympathetically as he led Alfred over to the group of cops. "It's not every day you get kidnapped."
"No, it's not." Alfred agreed as an ambulance rolled onto the scene. Suddenly, he heard someone calling his name. Looking up, he was surprised to see Arthur, Francis, and his brother running up to him, all of them with looks of relief on their faces.
"Huh, what are you guys doing here?" Alfred asked as his brother pulled him into a tight hug, and the other two started to fuss over him.
"Why the hell do you think?" Arthur said in disbelief. "You were bloody well kidnapped."
"Yeah, I'm aware of that." Alfred said with a light chuckle. "I meant, how did you find me?"
"A cop saw the car you were in, and followed it for a about five minutes. He saw that the two people in the car fit the descriptions that had been given out on the radio two hours before that, and saw that you were out cold. He attempted to pull it over, but the guy tried to speed off. The officer then took out the tires, and the guy pulled up here to stop from crashing." The officer next to him explained.
"We just happened to be in the area, because we were looking for you. We saw the crash happen." Matthew said as he looked Alfred over.
"He got out of the car, and ran over to the passenger side of the car, and to our horror, he pulled you out, and you were out cold. We thought you were de-, really hurt." Arthur said, looking really pissed off.
"Then he pointed the gun at your head, and everyone started to freak out." Francis added, looking pale. "He dragged you to the edge of the bridge, and started yelling at the police."
"What was he yelling?" Alfred asked as they led him to the ambulance to get looked over.
"He was threating to throw you off the bridge if we got any closer." The police man said, giving Alfred a pitying look.
"That bastard." Alfred thought angerly, as he felt his eye twitch in irritation. Mistaking his eye twitch for nerves, Matthew pat his brother on the shoulder.
"After about five minutes or so, you started to wake up." Matthew said. You know what happened after that. So, did he drug you or something?" He asked worriedly as the doctors ran over to check on him.
"Uh, no." Alfred admitted as the doctors sat him down in the back of the ambulance and started to check him out. "I kind of passed out from exhaustion."
"Huh?" Arthur asked in bewilderment. "Why?"
"I haven't slept in about 48 hours." Alfred admitted. "I've been overworking again."
"You idiot." Francis sighed, ruffling Alfred hair. "Let me guess, the guy snuck up on you, and you were too tired to pay attention to your surroundings, and that's how you got caught."
"Close." Alfred laughed tiredly. "Look, I really just want to get some sleep." Alfred said, giving them a tired look. "And I don't have a hotel to go to, and-" But suddenly, Alfred froze, and a look of anger crossed face.
"Al?" Matthew asked in concern.
"THAT BASTARD MADE ME LEAVE ALL MY STUFF AT THE RESTAURANT!" Alfred yelled angerly. "I'LL KILL HIM!"
Meanwhile
Ivan gasped as he dragged himself onto the bank of the river and ripped the mask off his face. That had been way too close, even for him. He had for sure lost them this time. He had already called for someone from his government to pick him up just before he got pulled over, and they were about ten minutes out. Although, he was planning on driving to meet them, not swimming. Sighing, he flopped onto his back, and watched the dawn break.
He was kind of pissed that that he had lost his car, and his phone, (at least they couldn't trace that number back to him), but he couldn't help but feel pleased with himself. It had been years sense he had just cut loose like that. He had to admit, this wasn't the way he planned to start his day, but he couldn't complain.
He had to admit, when he followed Alfred, he hadn't expected him to just faint out of the blue like that. As much as he wished Alfred would stop trying to one up him all the time, he kind of had a soft spot for the kid. After all, he was interesting. He had a tendency to bounce back from hardship, and improve himself. But damn, that kid needed to take a vacation every now and then. When he didn't, shit like this tended to happen.
He heard his ride coming, and with a sigh, he got up, and walked towards the road. At least it had been interesting. But he couldn't help but feel like he was forgetting something…
LINEBREAK
"Really?" Alfred asked in disbelief as Mary smirked. She nodded as handed him the notice. America had just got back to the office after spending an extra three days in China being interviewed by the Chinese police, and a pissed off China. For a 4,000-year-old guy, he could be really scary.
"Yep, not only do you get to keep your job, you're getting a two-week vacation, due to the fact that you were kidnapped due to being over worked." She then glowered at him. "Can take care of myself my butt. Who the hell gets kidnapped after fainting?"
"You're never going to let that go, are you?" Alfred sighed.
"No, and you're getting bodyguards for the next month." She said with a smirk.
"You are a cruel woman." Alfred laughed.
"I have to be to keep you in line." She huffed good in good humor. "Like I said before, I'm getting greyer by the day thanks to you."
"Have a good day." Alfred chuckled as he walked out of the office, planning on doing jack shit for the next two weeks.
A/N: Oh my god, this took forever to write. It's my longest chapter I've ever uploaded. But do you know why? BECAUSE ITS TO CELEBRATE GETTING OVER 2,000 COMMENTS ON THE STORY! (Congratulations to Insanity1127 for being my 2,000th reviewer!) This chapter is a rare one because it's not tied to any facts, and it's practically a mini story all by its self. I guess it's a gift to everyone who got the story to this mile mark. I hope you guys liked it, because it turned out a lot different from how I originally planned it out. The kidnapping wasn't even supposed to happen. It kind of just happened. This is a style I've never really tried before, because I don't really write action all that much, so tell me how I did, and if you want to read some more stuff like this chapter, check out my other story, "My Friend, My Enemy, My Acquaintance, Mr. America." Back to our regularly scheduled story. I'll see you later dudes.