Chapter Eighteen: Emotionally Stunted

To everyone else, watching Kakashi and Rin sort out their problems was amusing, almost comedic. Behind their backs, Kurenai, Izumi, Asuma, and Gai had started a running bet at who would cave first. Itachi and Shisui wisely didn't participate, citing that they weren't going to pick between their teammates.

Naturally, Kurenai and Izumi thought Kakashi would cave first, while Asuma claimed that Kakashi was too emotionally stunted to even notice what he did wrong. Gai merely proclaimed that Kakashi's flames of youth would never die out and would approach the situation with his usual apathy, meaning it would ignore the situation until it went away.

"The nerve of the man," Rin had ranted to Izumi and Kurenai earlier that day. Coincidentally, the two of them had been in the dango shop at the same time. Rin had introduced them before plopping down in the seat across them.

"What did he do now?" Izumi questioned. Though Kurenai wasn't one hundred percent sure which "he" Izumi was talking about, there really was only one person that came to mind.

"He asked me to move in with him." To which Kurenai almost choked on the piece of dango she was chewing.

"We're talking about Hatake, right?" Kurenai confirmed. Rin nodded.

"See, I told you. I knew you two always had a thing for each other. I mean, it's super obvious that he's always staring at you when you're not looking."

"For the last time Izumi, I don't have a thing with Kakashi," Rin insisted.

"You do spend a lot of time together," Izumi pointed out. Kurenai nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, training. Or figuring out new jutsus. Or completing a mission. Or paying our respects to sensei and Kushina nee. If spending a lot of time together is all the requirements needed, then I must have a thing with Itachi and Shisui as well."

Izumi scrunched her nose at that idea.

"Hai, hai, I know Itachi kun is yours," Rin teased. Izumi's face immediately flushed red.

"He's not...mine."

"Yet," Rin stressed. "The poor boy even asked me for gift ideas for your birthday. Don't tell him I told you though."

"Really?"

"Really," Rin confirmed. "And you Kurenai, when are you getting together with Asuma?" This time, Kurenai actually choked on her dango, sending her into a coughing fit.

Rin succeeded in turning the conversation away from her as a bright faced Kurenai started sharing details about her relationship with the Hokage's son. They weren't "official" yet, but there was an understanding that they weren't going to see anyone else. Kurenai proceeded to tell them of an instance when Asuma had gotten insanely jealous when he found her talking to another shinobi boy their age.

Being the youngest of the three, Izumi gushed at how romantic their relationship was, especially after Kurenai mentioned that Asuma always insisted walking her home after every mission, even if it was the middle of the day.

Somewhere in the conversation, Izumi finally admitted that she did like Itachi, but voiced her concerns that he didn't like her back. "Maybe he's just being polite."

"Being polite doesn't entail sitting at a dango shop with a clan member for hours," Rin argued. "Or paying for said dango."

In the end, the conversation turned back onto Rin. And her supposed problem with Kakashi.

"Why are you angry about him asking you to move in with him? Do you not want to?" Kurenai questioned.

"It's not that I'm opposed to moving in with him," Rin said in exasperation. "The problem is that we're not even dating, so why the hell would I move in with him?"

"You're not?" Izumi.

"I mean, everyone in our age groups seems to think you two are together," Kurenai added in Izumi's defense.

"Well, I'll admit that I had a crush on him when we were on a genin team together, but that was just a childish crush. I'm not sure how I feel about him now… I mean, we have gotten a lot closer after sensei died, but that could be because we are all that each other has left. So I'm not even sure if what I feel is that kind of...love."

"Even if it's just familial affection, you can still move in. Families live together," Kurenai told her.

Rin frowned. "That's too complicated. What if Kakashi gets a girlfriend? I don't want to...intrude on their private life."

Kurenai and Izumi exchanged knowing glances. At the mention of Kakashi having a girlfriend, Rin's face scrunched up in disgust, even if the girl herself didn't notice it. There was no question about it.

Rin was in love with Kakashi.

Familial affection? Definitely not.

Perhaps the most comedic thing of all was the impeccable teamwork between Rin and Kakashi even if they were at odds. All Kakashi needed to do was shoot a look at Rin and instantly, Rin would understand exactly what he wanted her to do. She followed his lead seamlessly and between the two of them, they took care of the ambush. Itachi and Shisui didn't even need to step in.

Even they hadn't reached that level of understanding, still relying on the brief Anbu hand signs to know what Kakashi wanted them to do.

The two of them exchanged amused snickers behind Kakashi and Rin's back. Rather, Shisui snickered while Itachi covered his chuckle with the palm of his hand.

After all of that was said and done, the two of them went back to ignoring each other, like they were new teammates thrown together for this mission.

Naturally as concerned teammates and friends, the Uchiha cousins approached the two of them on the subject. Rin pointed at Kakashi, insisting that it was his fault, while Kakashi raised his hands in the universal way that said "I'm innocent."

The two wouldn't find out exactly who was at fault until Izumi told them the story, to which Shisui claimed her account could very well be biased. Izumi vehemently defended her friend, claiming that Kakashi was just too insensitive to other people's feelings. Itachi wisely remained silent during the entire exchange.

"Did Kurenai say anything to you about Rin?" Kakashi had asked Asuma, on the rare occasion that he saw him without Kurenai next to him.

"Meh, she said a lot of things. Women are complicated, Kakashi. Just agree with them on everything and you'll be fine."

Well Asuma's suggestion wasn't that helpful. Was he suggesting Kakashi agree to move into Rin's apartment instead?

The cherry on top of the entire situation, if the others knew about it, was that Kakashi still showed up at Rin's apartment in the evenings, on the days when they were both in the village. And Rin would let him stay, still feeding him dinner then working on perfecting sensei's jutsus and finding a counter seal to Orochimaru's reanimation jutsu.

Normal people, when they had a conflict with someone, would either approach the other person about it or actively avoid the other person. Yet Rin and Kakashi acted as if everything was completely normal, still with the same coordination on missions, same level headed attitude when they sparred, and following the same routine. The only difference was that Rin had considerably less things to say to him than before.

Was that supposed to be concerning?

His emotionally stunted self figured the best way to figure out a problem was to just ask Rin herself. So he did.

"About the other day, did I say anything to offend you?"

Rin didn't even look up. "Don't worry about it."

So Kakashi took her words literally. But how could he not worry about it, when Rin was still acting like her strange self?

Two days later, as Team Ro finished giving their mission report of their latest mission to the Hokage, Itachi and Shisui were the first to leave. Kakashi stayed behind to wait for Rin, like he usually did, but this time, the Hokage called for her to stay behind.

And assigned her a C ranked mission, a request from the king of the Land of Snow, asking for her medical expertise. Naturally, Rin agreed to the mission.

"I'll go with you," Kakashi offered, like he always did.

And Rin would agree, like she always did, except this time…

"No."

"No," Kakashi echoed. "Why?"

"It's just a C ranked mission, Kakashi. I don't need you to come along with me."

The Third sincerely looked like he didn't want to get caught in the middle of their quarrel, so Rin took the mission scroll from him before leaving. Kakashi looked for an opportunity to press Rin further on her strange attitude, but Rin shot him down before he could even open his mouth.

"Don't come tonight. I need to get rest before my mission tomorrow."

And she left him to dust, to wonder exactly where and when he went wrong.

Seeing no other choice, as Rin didn't want to talk to him about it, Kakashi sought out Izumi Uchiha.

To say Izumi was thoroughly surprised to see Kakashi at a dango shop was an understatement. Not only did Izumi know that he didn't like sweets as Rin mentioned it to her once in passing, but he had been looking for her. They hardly spoke before, and the few times they did, Rin, Itachi, or Shisui would always be there to act as a buffer.

None of them were there though, as Kakashi slid in the seat across from her.

"What's wrong with Rin?"

Straight to the point. That was a good trait, Izumi supposed. At least she got to avoid the awkwardness associated with trying to make small talk with an acquaintance.

"What do you mean 'what's wrong' with her? Elaborate."

And Kakashi did. "Rin has been acting weird towards me. Ever since I suggested that she move in with me, Rin has been acting weird. At the end of that conversation, Rin even threw a book at me. I figured that it was a one time thing and that she would be fine the next day, but she's not fine.

"I still act like I normally would, but Rin doesn't talk to me as much. And when she does talk, it's always about the mission or something equally important. She's treating me like I'm an acquaintance or something.

"And then today, she received a solo mission. I offered to go with her, like I always do, and she shot me down. Rin never had a problem with me going on the mission with her."

For such a perspective man, Kakashi was surprisingly blind.

"Why did you ask her to move in with you?" Izumi needed to figure out what the hell went on in the man's mind.

"We're both away on missions more often than not and I spend so much time at her apartment anyways, so it makes sense to move in together and save money."

It was official. Kakashi Hatake was not only blind, but stupid. And this was the man who was hailed as a genius in their graduating class.

On the account that Kakashi did genuinely look worried at the prospect of his failing relationship or was it friendship? with Rin, Izumi decided she would help him out.

"You talked to Rin about it, right?"

"Of course I did. Rin told me not to worry about it, but she's still acting strange. I don't know what to do."

Kakashi looked defeated.

"I think Rin's problem with you is that you are leading her on and sending her mixed signals, whether you know it or not."

"Leading her on? Sending her mixed signals? When?"

Izumi sighed, knowing that she had a lot more explaining to do if she wanted the man to understand anything. So Izumi began with tearing down his explanation of why he wanted to move in with Rin and explained to him that he wanted to move in together for all of the wrong reasons.

"Moving in is a big step in a relationship between lovers," Izumi told him. "When she asked you why you didn't move into her apartment, she was trying to see if you were being completely serious or just said it as a joke. Since the two of you are nowhere near that stage in your relationship, I think she's a bit upset that you kept insisting."

"Not to mention the fact," Izumi continued, when she saw Kakashi opening his mouth to interrupt, raising her hand in the motion to indicate for him to stop. Kakashi wisely shut his mouth. "You do all these confusing things. You show up at her apartment to spend time with her, but then you suggest spending the time trying to figure out new jutsus. You invite her out for dinner, but then you spend the time going over the details for your next mission. You volunteer to subject yourself to boring C ranked missions, but then you tell her you only did because you were bored inside of the village. Maybe you don't understand the implications of your actions or perhaps Rin is reading too much into it, but your actions confuse her.

"I know you care about her. But what you need to do now is to figure out your own feelings before you talk to her again. If you don't love her, then you need to let her go."

"So you're saying if I don't love her, I should stop doing all of those things so Rin doesn't get anymore mixed signals?"

Izumi really wanted to call him a lost cause, but for the sake of her friend, Izumi would continue to help his emotionally stunted brain wrap itself around the concept of love.

"Not necessarily, but you should make sure that both of you are on the same page. Is it a friendly outing or is it a date? Since I know you aren't good at reading the situation, I would suggest just being straightforward with her. I think Rin will appreciate your honesty."

It had seemed like good advice at the time and would have been good advice, if Kakashi went about it normally. Izumi figured Rin would want to know that Kakashi didn't reciprocate her feelings rather than continue to be strung along. It would hurt, but Rin would get over it. And if Kakashi did happen to love her back, then all was well.

Except fucking Kakashi Hatake never went about things normally.

Except fucking Kakashi Hatake just had to make Izumi eat her advice the moment she heard what Kakashi decided to tell Rin.

Fucking Kakashi and his stupid emotionally stunted self.

Seven o'clock in the morning was the safest time. Kakashi was a man of routine, so Rin knew that he always woke up at six o'clock every morning. At 6:45, Kakashi would leave his apartment, after getting dressed and eating breakfast. At 6:50, Kakashi would stand in front of the memorial stone as the sun rose, the morning rays hitting his backside. At 7:55, Kakashi would promptly remember that Team Ro always met up at 8:00. Then he would mumble his goodbyes to Obito, taking another five minutes. And always, Kakashi would arrive at the training grounds or Hokage Tower or mission gates, depending on the day, at 8:07.

Always seven minutes late, but Team Ro had learned to get used to it.

So seven o'clock in the morning was the safest time for Rin to leave if she didn't want to run into Kakashi. Ten minutes into his visit at the memorial stone, Kakashi would always be too lost in his own thoughts to think about anything else.

As she neared the gates, shifting her backpack on her shoulders, Rin spotted two bleary eyed chunins. One was nodding off, head slipping out of his hand, but always caught himself before his head slammed against the desk. The other was staring blankly at the kanji on one of the gates, hardly even blinking.

A loud whistle, the two chunins immediately scrambled into focus, eyes darting around to find the threat. Except there were no threats and they settled back down in their seats, mumbling something under their breaths. As Rin passed them on her way out the gates, she shot them a cheery grin before taking off into the trees.

Only to stop half a kilometer out from the gates because she spotted a familiar mop of silver hair sitting in the trees. Rin flickered her chakra as she cautiously approached him, but Kakashi didn't move. From the way his backside was slumped over at her angle, Rin feared the worst.

He had been injured and had been out in the forest all night.

Pushing all thoughts of avoiding him out of her mind, Rin landed onto the same branch as him. His chest was still rising up and down; good, he was still breathing. Rin's medically trained eye roved his entire torso, noting the numerous scratches on the Anbu armor, but there were no wounds as far as she could tell.

When his eye shot open, Rin instantly knew she had been tricked. Still, she didn't make a move to leave, knowing Kakashi would just follow her. And she didn't need him following her on this mission.

"What do you want?" Leaving at this time had been a severe miscalculation on her part, maybe she should have left after Team Ro was due to meet. But of course, Kakashi knew her as well as she knew him. No doubt she had conveniently forgotten about that as she made her plan.

"We need to talk."

"About what? Can't it wait until after my mission?" Rin snapped, irritation evident in her tone.

"It's not good for you to go on a mission without a clear mind," Kakashi told her. Kakashi was right, but Rin didn't voice that thought aloud. Instead she merely shot him a look that told him to get on with it.

"Listen, I think I understand why you've been acting strange towards me." Did he really? Rin highly doubt it. "And I think I should just be honest with you."

"I'm sorry," Kakashi continued. Rin hated the apologetic look in his eye, hated it because she couldn't hate him for telling her no when he looked like that. "I can't return your feelings. I can't do that to Obito."

She would have accepted his honesty, even thanked him for being point blank with her, until he mentioned Obito.

"What do you mean you can't do that to Obito?"

"I can't take you away from Obito. You were always his."

Rin felt numb, his words echoing in her head. You were always his. You were always his. You were always his. Did she even have a choice? What right did Kakashi have to decide for her?

She turned her head away from Kakashi, so he couldn't see the first slew of tears that streamed down her face.

"I'll see you when I get back." It took an immense amount of effort to force those words out of her mouth without choking up. With a casual wave, Rin darted off into the trees, willing Kakashi to not follow her. To not notice what he had done to her.

He didn't. Instead, Kakashi stared at Rin's fleeting back, his inner feelings full of turmoil. Izumi told him that honesty would make it better and Kakashi agreed with her, yet why did his honesty make Rin look even more broken. Sound even more pained?

And if honesty was supposed to make all better, then why was his heart aching?

Why was guilt eating him inside out?

Why...why couldn't he get her tear stained face out of his mind?

A/N: Hi again!

This was a fun chapter to write since I got the opportunity to explore a different side of Kakashi than we normally see. I always figured Kakashi would be sort of clueless when it comes to relationships (like parenting - have you seen the episode where he gives Sasuke trash parenting advice? lol). I should also mention that this is pre Icha Icha Paradise so he doesn't have Jiraiya's books to guide him - hmm, not sure when he actually started reading those books tbh. If anyone knows, please let me know.

And well, I also figured that Kakashi would be the type of be loyal to his bro, which would be why he never made a move, but you know, maybe you have a different view.

Anyways, next chapter is called Land of the Snow. Finally - mission time :) I alluded to this arc way back in the beginning (I don't remember which particular chapter), but if you go back and find it, I think it will help you piece together what is about to happen in the next 2 chapters. :P

As always, thanks for reading and let me know what you think! Until next time!

-MM