-9 years ago-

Only one year old, Hikari's little hands grip tightly to her mother's. As her little legs struggle to walk, she wobbled with each step. Her eyes carefully watching her feet, as if studying them. Trying to make sure she was doing it correctly. Under the watchful and loving eyes of her mother, who moved along with her. Encouraging her daughter silently. Smiling lovingly. Hikari's eyes look up into her mother's bright and warm ones, that beamed down unto her. Focusing on the smile her mother had, she always had on no matter what. It was such a gentle and kind smile. Nothing was dark nor bad with that smile. It cast away all clouds and shined brighter than the sun.

Her smile made everything better, it made Hikari smile. And smile the little toddler did. Making her mother smile even more.

"My little Hikari."Her mother said so softly and gently to her.

Gripping her daughter's hands delicately and firmly, she takes each step with Hikari across their living room floor. Slow and steady. Never letting go, she refused to let her daughter go. Staring into Hikari's eyes, seeing everything staring back from her daughter. Life. She saw life and light in her daughter. Strength. Strength and determination from her father. She could see Neji's face reflecting back from her daughter, just a second. It would have made her cry, but instead she smiled more. Knowing.

The two of them reach the other side, thrilled and proud of her daughter. The mother scoops her up in her arms, hugging and praising her daughter on a job well done. Laughing. Hikari laughs and giggles with her mother. Sharing in the this moment, unsure for what reason except the happiness she felt from her mother.

"I am so proud of you, Hikari."

Those same words remained as the years transcended to Hikari's acceptance into the Suna Academy, her mother standing there with the same proud and loving smile on. Holding her infant brother in her arms. Her mother couldn't applaud like the other parents. Those same words came from her mother when Hikari graduated from the Academy top of the class. Her mother there so proud and happy.

Always smiling. Always despite how bad things would get. Very, rarely Hikari saw it anything else. Even when it came to her father. Her mother smiled. She just smiled. A smile Hikari saw as her guiding light...

A light that flickered faintly. Struggling. A light to her horror she knew she was killing.

What had she done? This wasn't what she wanted, this wasn't what she meant. Seeing her mother in the condition she was in, was completely different from when she was pregnant or gave birth. At least she smiled, even when her body was weak. This, right here before her eyes...her mother's body struggling to live. Attached to her a breathing mask, wires hooked up to her. Her eyes shut. The laceration upon her mother's body, she only imagine. Recalling the horrible event that broke not just her mother's smile, but also her spirit and heart. She dared and feared not to use her Byakugan, afraid of what else her eye would see deeper. This wasn't how she expected it to go. Her mind kept playing it over and over again, again and again.

It begin to haunt her like vengeful spirits. The blood, screams, sound of piercing flesh. Glass shattering, burning. Metal being bent, ripped and shredded. Their presence, their dark evil presence. The way they thrust their hand through, her mother's torso. Her mother just threw herself before the attacker, never had Hikari seen her mother's blood before. It splattered on her, in shock at the horror before her eyes.

This wasn't suppose to happen, was all she could keep telling herself. Her mother before her, barely there. Watching her aunt Ino and Grandmother Tsunade tend to her mother. There was no way a sin like this could be cleansed. Tears begin to well up, eyes begin to sting. Imagines of her mother, through her nine years of life flooded. Her mother's voice was starting to fade. Lifting a hand, placing it on the glass that separated her from being with her mom. Right now she could use her mother's smile. Use that light right now, that said everything would be alright. The arms that held her, whenever she needed comfort and solace. To hear her mother's calming beating heart. That would sooth her. Closing her eyes, she tries to hear it. But heard nothing. She needed to hear her mother tell to keep smiling. Her her voice, asking what's wrong. To feel her mother's gentle touch that wiped away all her worries, frustrations...everything. Feel the lips that assured her she was loved and will always be. Touching her forehead, the spot her mother would kiss.

She felt nothing. This wasn't what she wanted. This wasn't it. Not at all.

Mother. Regretting the deal she made, if she could just go back and fix it she would. She would. Shutting her eyes, to avoid seeing her actions. Feeling stupid and selfish. Feeling the suffering she had caused. From not just herself, but from everyone. Everyone. It seem to amplify. Spiked.

Yoshi.

His name came to her mind, her eyes open in shock and horror. Realizing what she had done. Seeing his smiling face, as he colored on the floor. Merrily and happy. Not a care in the world. Before it happened. He was getting up to come and show her and their mother the picture surprise he had. No doubt it was another picture of the family. Happy, this time with her twin sisters. Oh, God! She gasp. The twins. Her defenseless sisters.

She didn't want this, she didn't. Thrashing around in her mind. She falls to her knees, being crushed under the weight of her sins. Never had her head hung so slow. Struggling hard to keep her tears. Inside everything she kept to be strong, crumbled. All the pride she had crumbled too. It was meaningless now. All the spite and vex she had, gone in the wind. Her selfish desires meant nothing. Her mind ravaged through their words, realizing they had twisted her words and desire. And how she discarded the price of payment she would have to pay.

Yoshi was on the floor of the train, with all his crayons scattered all around. Not even bothering to look at the color his hand grabbed. Drawing his picture, trying to act secertively. Using his other arm to cover it. Which never worked, but in his mind it did. Behind him, his mother had made her way over to Hikari. Leaving his twin sisters in the care of the assistance. While his, Yoma sat by him. Hikari had her eyes closed and arms crossed. Telling others to leave her alone. That didn't stop her mother from coming. Sensing her presence, the young Hyuga didn't bother to open her eyes. Shutting her mother out, hold firm to her position. Refusing to acknowledge her mother, who didn't move. Instead she calls to her daughter, hoping to talk. But she didn't get any response back. Even when she gently brushed her bangs away from daughter's face. Hikari shrugs her off, turning her back towards her mother. Slouching further away. Grumbling under her breath.

"Hikari, tell me how was training at the manor?"

She heard her mother ask, trying to start small talk. Hikari didn't respond, only grunting in irritation. This didn't stop her mother.

"Hisahi has told me, you're getting much better. That's so wonderful."

Still the Hyuga refused to respond. Hearing her mother sigh silently to herself. She still kept at it, Hikari knew her mother was smiling the whole time. Always. That it was becoming an annoyance to the young girl. It was starting to lose its affect from what it use to be able to do. Feeling something gently and playfully poking her cheek, made her open an eye, finding her mother doing it. Laughing and smile.

"Little light, little light, why are you so gloom?"her mother begin semi-sing."Tell me little light what is bothering you?"The same song, her mother sung when she was younger, whenever she was in a unpleasant mood. When she was sad, upset, anything. She would poke her face gently, which would eventually make her laugh.

Not this time, it wasn't going to work. Her mother realized this and stops. Sighing to herself. It seem like she had given up, which Hikari thought, but was completely wrong. What her mother said next surprised her.

"Hikari, I'm sorry."her mother apologizes."I know it's been rather hard for you. All of this happening, if you've been hurt in anyway. Please know that was never my intentions."Opening her eyes finally, she looks at her mother. She wasn't smiling brightly, her smile was a cross between a frown and smile. She could see in her mother's eyes how hurt she was for her daughter. Ready to cry, but no tears came.

Her mother turns to her, as she spoke. Hikari heard her voice crack but did her best to remain strong. Feeling a hand hold onto her's, she looks down finding her mother's. Squeezing it and this warm feeling suddenly.

"Whatever pain, you are feeling Hikari,"her mother starts to bring into a hug."Know, that I will always be here to take it away. Always. I promise."

Right after those words left her mother's mouth, the attack happened. And everything went white then black.

Always.

Always, her mother had said. Looking back at her mother, Hikari wasn't sure that would happen. The pain she had inside now, screaming and begging her mother to take it away from her. Like she promised. Raising her arms, forgetting about one of them being injured she starts banging on the glass desperately. Screaming for her mother not to leave her. Screaming on the top of her lungs, her eyes activate on their own, she now saw everything. All the damage she'd done not just physical, but emotionally, and mentally. Maybe it was just her mind showing her the errors of her what she'd done. It hurt just seeing this. She kept banging and banging, her injuries begin to reopen and started to slowly bleed through the wrapping. Her Gentle Fist begin to take affect, along with her hands and arms becoming coated in metal skin again.

The sheer strength was starting to crack the glass. Her screams and cries reached Ino and Tsunade. They look up from the operating room, seeing Hikari. The fear in her eyes, the desperate pleading, the little girl wanting her mother. Sakura had stepped into the room returning with more supplies and hears her. Her eyes cast up at her. All their hearts went out to her, the anger they had felt towards her for her action. Vanished, looking down at her friend upon the operating table. Clinging for life, in a sedated coma. They had to put her in, made them wonder if she even heard her daughter's cries.

As they get started, Ino checking the oxygen noticed something with her friend. She was sure her eyes weren't playing any tricks. Looking closer, at her eyes.

Back with Hikari, her body still recovering gave exhausted itself and she fell back down on her knees. Head hung low, tucking her head in grabbing both sides. Slowly shaking her head back and forth.

"T-This wasn't what I wanted..."she cries as tears dropped."This wasn't what I wanted."