Our Finest Gifts We Bring

After their opulent meal, they all retreated once more to the parlour for the fun part of the evening, which would include alcohol and their a-bit-out-of-the-ordinary gift exchange. It had seemed reasonable to wait until after dinner and after Teddy had been picked up.

Luna helped Hermione put out the presents underneath the tree. She, too, threw a compassionate glance at the petrified garden gnomes in the manger. "I don't think they like it very much," she said softly, sounding regretful. "There are wizzbizzies crawling all over them. I bet they itch, and petrified as they are, they can't even scratch."

Hearing that, Hermione once more appealed to Harry and Draco to set the poor gnomes free, but they waved her off. "Oh come on – there's no such thing as wingbees, you know how Luna is!" Harry half groaned, half whispered, not meaning to hurt their friend. "We haven't seen a single Nargle yet, and Luna claims the mistletoes are infested with them."

Hermione would have agreed with him about a year ago, but after all she had experienced with the Netherfairies and the Gloomilows, she wasn't so sure anymore. Maybe Luna was not merely being eccentric... However, she was unable to swing Harry and Draco, who promised to set the poor gnomes free right the next day, so they would have to keep holding silent vigil for tonight.

Harry, Draco, Luna and Hermione squashed onto the sofa, while Remus and Severus took the two chairs. "So how does this gift exchange work?" Draco enquired, wondering when and how those white elephants would come into play. Hopefully, they'd be smaller than the moose.

"It's quite simple," Hermione explained. "You take a present from the pile or – provided you're not the first – take away the present of any person who has drawn before you, in which case that person gets to draw another present. It's better with even more people participating, but this will do."

"Doesn't stealing other people's Christmas gifts kind of go against the spirit of it all?" wondered Severus. "I've been told it's all about giving, not taking..."

"Too bad you never acted on that assumption, at least before the holidays," Draco snorted. "As far as house points go, you're always more of a taking than giving person."

Severus smirked. "Indeed. That's why I've never been much of a Christmas person, either."

"No," Harry said, laughing. "From what we witnessed at Hogwarts, you were more the grouchy, cave-dwelling Grinch. If you could have stolen the entire feast, you would have!"

"I have no idea who that Grinch is, but that does sound like Severus," Draco agreed. "Mother always had a hard time getting him to attend the Christmas festivities at Malfoy Manor. Don't understand why. I always loved the feast – great food and many presents. Nothing with elephants, though."

"The expression is said to come from the historic practice of the King of Siam, who gave rare albino elephants to courtiers who had displeased him," Hermione explained. "Others call it 'Dirty Santa'."

"Is that how your father came into possession of those ridiculous white peacocks of his?" Severus asked Draco pensively. "I believe they were a gift from the Dark Lord, though I doubt he was familiar with the gift giving traditions of the King of Siam."

"I wasn't familiar with them, either," Luna declared. "When Harry told me about it, I thought we would exchange actual white elephants for gifts. I had already made a real cute one out of sea shells before he explained it to me. But I'm happy that I'll get to keep it now."

Draco, who had thought until a moment a ago that a White Elephant Gift exchange would at least involve the conjuring or transfiguring of white Elephants, wisely kept his mouth shut. It was a stupid, misleading name. "I like 'Dirty Santa' better, anyway," he said. "It has a nice, naughty ring to it."

"Why don't you go first and pick a present?" Hermione suggested and grinned. "Then I can play dirty and steal it from you when it's my turn."

"Yeah, I bet you would like being a naughty girl, wouldn't you, Granger?" Draco gave her a salacious wink and got up. After studying the gifts beneath the tree, he finally decided on the package that was wrapped in elegant black and silver paper. It looked very classy – until he unwrapped it. "Ugh – that's hideous!" he exclaimed in horror, staring at a pair of pink plush slippers in the shape of Flamingos.

Harry laughed. "More useful than white peacocks, at least. I think they suit you, Draco!"

"Try them on!" Remus suggested. "I bet their heads bob when you walk around in them."

"Worse," said Severus drily. "They talk."

"Really?" Curious, Draco stepped into the slippers and cautiously walked towards the piano.

'Uh – what's the smell in here?' asked the left Flamingo, bobbing his head indignantly.

Draco scowled. "My feet don't smell, stupid bird!"

'Since you're up anyway, how about a trip to the loo?' suggested the right slipper.

Hermione laughed. "Oh, that's hilarious! Who ever gave you those, Severus?"

"Dumbledore," he answered darkly. "He had a really strange sense of humour."

Luna smiled. "They are funny!"

"They're pink!" snorted Draco, walking back to the sofa.

'Hey, you're walking all over us!' the left Flamingo complained.

'Always tread carefully!" the other advised, nodding enthusiastically.

Hermione could easily imagine Severus' indignation when finding out about the slipper's embedded charmwork. Though that could only have happened if he had put them on in the first place...

Severus unsuccessfully tried to hide his smirk beneath a solemn expression. "It does go rather well with your light complexion and your long, blond hair," he offered.

"If you find them too girly, don't worry yet, Draco," Harry helpfully put in. "They'd go nicely with Luna's hair and complexion, too. She might steal them from you, yet."

"Who's next?"

"Since your present was picked, it's your turn, Severus," Harry said and gestured to the pile under the tree.

Severus picked the biggest, most strangely shaped gift, which, even after unwrapping, kept its rather peculiar form. "What in Merlin's name is this?" he wondered, puzzling at the strange object he held in his hands. It looked like a glass and was filled with a yellowish liquid and weird, thick substance in a glowing orange. The latter was slowly forming bubble-like shapes that lazily rose from the bottom, merged into another pool of red at the top and then sunk down again from the top in an ever repeating circle. It was giving off an eery glow and was strangely compelling to look at.

"Oh, I know what that is!" exclaimed Hermione excitedly, who also had a good idea who donated it. "It's a lava-lamp!"

"What's a lava lamp, Granger?" asked Draco, eying the strange object suspiciously. It looked like a bottle containing a rather dangerous looking potion.

"A muggle device – it's like a lamp that's supposed to be relaxing to watch. How come it works without electricity?"

"Oh, is that what it's called?" asked Luna, delighted. "I never knew. Dad found it in a Muggle shop. He first thought that someone had managed to trap Flumoxsies in a jar, as impossible as that seems. When he confronted the shop owner about it, he seemed utterly ignorant."

"I must be ignorant, too, then. What in Merlin's name are Flumoxsies?" asked Harry dubiously.

"Oh, they are a rare subspecies of fire sprites. You can find them in areas with high volcanic activity. They dwell deep in the Earth and are rarely ever seen on the surface. They are also impossible to touch – you'd be incinerated if you tried." Luna nodded toward the lamp. "Father bought this with the intention of setting them free on his next trip to Iceland, but then he discovered that it must be a Muggle imitation, as the jar came with this sort of tail – I think 'pluck' was the word. Well, it was stupid, he admitted it himself. I mean – however would anyone have managed to catch Flumoxsies in the first place? We had a good laugh about it, but then we figured out that it works without the pluck-thingy if you cast 'Lumos' and a heating charm on it. We kept it, cut off its tail and pranked some of Dad's friends, who naturally thought it was Flumoxsies at first, too." Luna smiled fondly at the memory, and Hermione grinned madly, imagining how the conversation with the poor Muggle in the shop must have played out... 'Are those Flumoxsies you have trapped in that jar, young man? I don't care how you managed to pull that off, but if you're unwilling to fly to Iceland and set them free right now, I will!'

Judging from Severus' amused expression, he must have had similar thoughts. Or he was just quite taken with his present.

"Luna, your turn next."

"Oh, great." She smiled brightly, and, ignoring the presents under the tree, reached for the flamingo slippers in Draco's lap.

"You must be kidding, Lovegood! You actually want these?"

"Yes. Unless you'd rather keep them?"

"No, by all means – take them! Better you than me!"

Luna slipped into the fluffy foot warmers and took two steps back to her seat. 'Yes! Let's get going!" suggested one of the Flamingos happily, while the other sullenly replied: "No! Put those feet up, I'm not in the mood!'

Hermione giggled. "I like them, too, Luna, you might not get to keep them... Draco – you're allowed to pick another present."

He briefly eyed the lava lamp with interest, but Severus clutched it more tightly and shot him a menacing glance. "Don't you dare, Draco! I intend to keep this. It fits perfectly into my office's jar collection. The dunderheads will wonder what kind of mysterious, dangerous specimen it contains, especially if I tell them that it can incinerate them on touch."

"Apart from the Muggleborn students," Harry chuckled. "They will just wonder if you have gone balmy."

Draco grabbed another gift from the pile and tore through the wrapping. "Books..." he said, opening the heavy hardcovers and perusing the non-moving illustrations. "This must be from you, Granger. What is this – a fairy tale book?"

"One is a collection of Grimm's fairytales, a classic among Muggles. The others are famous fantasy novels. They were even made into movies. I'll take you to see them, if you actually read the books."

"Why are you giving away books?" he asked, flipping through the pages of the first one. It was rich with colourful illustrations. "Are you sure they're Muggle? Look, there is a hag in it... and a werewolf... And... is this supposed to be a Leprechaun, or a renegade goblin?"

Hermione looked at the picture he was pointing at. "That's Rumpelstiltskin," she declared. "I think he's a goblin. He knows how to create fool's gold."

Draco snorted. "As if a goblin would ever wear clothes like that! But they do have the child-eating hag right. Just why does she live in a house made of sweets? How peculiar! I never knew that Muggles were aware of goblins, wizards and fairies..."

"They are just fairy tales," Hermione shrugged. "No one believes they are real. The big one is 'Lord of the Rings'. Another epic fantasy novel. The last one is a vampire romance. Vampires are quite the rage at the moment, but the book is incredibly cheesy."

"A vampire romance?" Draco frowned. "How weird. Don't Muggles know they bite and feed on humans?"

"Well, yes, but... that's kind of the allure. I never liked those kind of stories." She flushed a little. "I found them too irrational and too fantastic. I preferred books that were a bit more logical and scientific. The stories about witches scared me."

"Granger, you do realize how strange that is, don't you? I didn't know Muggles knew about Animagi... look, here's a wizard who's actually walking around upright in his cat form, wearing muggle boots. And this prince's Animagus is a frog... poor guy."

Fascinated, Draco kept skimming the fairytale book, looking at the pictures. "Hermione, your turn..." he murmured absent-mindedly.

Hermione's eyes went to the Flamingo Slippers. "I hope you aren't too attached to those, Luna, but I want them. They look soft and warm." Besides, she found the idea amusing to wear them together with the robe Severus had given her. She'd love to see his face if she ever ran into him again on her way to the Hogwarts' kitchen, wearing both. "Pick something else!"

Luna got up and after careful consideration, chose a sturdy looking box. "Funny, it feels like there's something moving inside..." she said, sitting back down and balancing the box on her knees.

"Be careful," Harry obviously felt compelled to warn her. "It's a rather harmless specimen, but it might bite if you handle it too roughly."

Curious, they all watched as Luna opened the metal lock on the box and peeked inside. She smiled. "Oh, isn't that beautiful!" she exclaimed, put her hand inside and gently pulled out a miniature dragon. A Horntail, if she remembered correctly. "Isn't that the dragon you fought in the Tri-Wizard-Tournament?"

"Yes. That's the rather cute copy they made us pull from a bag. It's not real, of course, but whoever placed the charm on the thing did a fantastic job. It totally behaves like a real dragon – it even sends out small puffs of fire if you poke it. My mother charmed a rose petal into a goldfish once, as a gift for Slughorn. I believe that must have been a similar charm."

"It's a rather complex combination of transfiguration and multi-layered charms, very advanced magic. She was really good at those, your mother," said Severus.

"Yes," agreed Remus. "She once made me a hamster. Unfortunately, it escaped from the dormitory one day and was never seen again. It probably got eaten by one of the castle's cats."

"It looks so alive..." marvelled Luna, who held the mini dragon on her hand and fed him a piece of chocolate.

"Yes, he does," agreed Harry. "I never understood how that works. Does transfiguring a cup into a mouse really make it alive and sentient?"

"Objects transfigured into animals are not alive, Potter," Severus snorted. "Even wizards can't create life out of dead matter – we'd hardly be sitting here celebrating the birth of Christ if we didn't worship his Holy Father as creator of all life. Transfigurations are just powerful and realistic animations. A transfigured cup is still a cup, just one that looks and acts like a mouse. Think of it as a sophisticated Muggle robot."

Harry pointed to the chocolate the dragon seemed to devour with relish. "But how can it eat if it isn't real?"

"It doesn't," explained Remus. "It just comes with a built-in vanishing charm."

"I never knew you still had this..." said Hermione to Harry. "Where did you hide it all those years?"

"I really found him pretty cool, especially after I had managed to escape the real one. I put a stasis charm on it and put it in my trunk. But after everything else that happened at the tournament, I forgot all about it until I moved in here. Kreacher emptied my entire trunk for cleaning – admittedly for the first time ever – and found it."

"I like him," said Luna, gently stroking the dragon, who seemed confused by her action. Obviously, whoever had programmed it had failed to specify how a dragon was supposed to react to petting. "It'll need a name, though. Ideas, anybody?"

"Norbert!" exclaimed Harry and Hermione with one voice and both started giggling.

"Must be an inside joke," Draco reckoned, when Remus and Severus looked puzzled as well.

"I'm not even sure if it even is a he..." said Luna pensively and carefully turned the flapping and wriggling dragon on its back to examine his or her private parts. Apparently, it hadn't been given specifications as to how to react to that, either. "Oh no!" she exclaimed. "It's neither! It doesn't have any sexual organs!"

"Well, it hardly has need of them, given that it won't be performing any bodily functions with them," pointed Severus out.

"Still..." said Luna. "Poor thing! I'll take good care of him. Go ahead, Harry, it's your turn."

Harry got up and reached for a package that looked like a wrapped stick. In fact, it was a stick. An elaborately crafted and adorned cane with a golden handle that was formed like a horse's head.

"This looks pretty expensive..." he mused, grabbing the heavy knob and taking a few steps with the cane. "I feel like Moody. Hopefully, I'll never end up needing a walking aid like he did."

"Harry!" exclaimed Hermione excitedly. "Look at you!"

"What?"

"The stick – it does something to the way you walk. Like Severus with his robes... It adds a kind of flair... I don't know how to describe it..."

"I do," snorted Draco. "It makes you look gay."

"Hah, bloody hah!" Harry turned and approached the mirror above the fireplace this time, looking at his reflection. "I look like your father. I even do move with a kind of regal elegance... or should I say arrogance?"

"Call it prancing. It's charmed to make your movements look more fancy. It was a gift from my father," Draco said, sounding bitter. "It was just another means to make me into his mirror image."

Remus stiffly got up and took the pompous item away from Harry. "Since I'm the only one who's left, I guess it's my turn. And whoever brought this must have meant me to receive it. Who else could use a walking stick?"

He took a few hesitant steps with it. This time, Hermione wasn't the only one who gasped. Where before his gait had been unbalanced and stiff with him appearing slightly crouched, he now walked with his artificial leg as if it was his own – as if he had never been injured at all. Elegant and graceful. "Remus... this is awesome! I can't believe it!"

Even Draco's mouth was hanging agape. "And here I was thinking that it's just a stupid accessory to make everybody look like a pompous fool... Wow!"

"There, walk up to the mirror, Remus, and see for yourself."

Remus did as Harry had suggested, his eyes fixed on his reflection. He was silent, but his eyes were getting suspiciously misty. "I don't know what to say, Draco... This is the most beautiful gift I've ever received."

"If I had known it was as useful as this I would have given it to you straight away. I had no idea."

"Harry – you get to pick the last present, given that your stick was stolen."

The last gift package proved to be a wooden box with chocolate frog cards.

"It is a rather pitiful gift to give..." said Remus, a bit embarrassed, "especially regarding what I got in return. But I was hoping that you would end up with it... In my youth, this was my most prized possession. I loved chocolate, I still do, but I couldn't afford buying a lot of it, so my own chocolate card collection was rather poor. Sirius and James and Lily ended up giving all their chocolate frogs cards to me, so it's a rather impressive collection. Given the cards change every decade or so, you'll find a lot of wizards in there who do not feature on cards nowadays. I know that you're a bit behind with your own collection, given that you only started when you came to Hogwarts and never inherited anything from relatives..."

"These are from chocolate frogs my mum and dad bought... and Sirius? Remus – thank you – that is a wonderful gift! But – shouldn't you be keeping it for Teddy?"

"When you feel the time is right and you don't need it anymore as a reminder of people you loved, I'm sure you'll pass it on to your godson in the same way I'm passing it on to you now. I guess at almost forty, I'm getting a bit too old for chocolate frog cards, and I haven't been adding to the collection for years. Though I still like to eat the frogs..."

"Thank you, Remus!" Harry felt his eyes become slightly misty. This was the second really great gift he had received this day. First the memories of his mother from Severus, now this wonderful memento of his father from Remus. It had turned out to be an unexpectedly plentiful Christmas.

A/N 2020: I'm not quite sure if I should continue publishing the last three or four chapters of this little story now or rather wait for the end of the year. There doesn't seem to be a whole lot of interest, which is probably due to the fact that nobody is in the mood for anything Christmassy anymore. :) Even if I decide not to continue publishing at this point, never fear: The story is completed, it's just a matter of sending the last chapter to my beta for proof-reading. I will definitely have it completed by Christmas THIS year. :)