Chapter 7: Ovulation Obstacles
When they reached the Ministry Hermione and Draco parted ways to see the respective healers who would be examining them. As she sat in the exam room waiting for her healer Hermione found herself wondering about the changes she had seen in Malfoy during the past two days. She'd been more than a little surprised by how polite he'd been to her and in all honesty it had unnerved her a little to find that when he wasn't being a git he could be very charming.
She didn't doubt that his change in attitude had to do with the horrors he'd experienced during the war, and perhaps whilst suffering the indignity of his stay in Azkaban pending his trial date at the Ministry. The fact that he needed her cooperation to free his parents probably also contributed to his overall manners and amicability.
"Ah, Miss Granger," a healer with a bright smile said, drawing Hermione's attentions from her ponderings, "I'm Healer Thomas. What seems to be the trouble today?"
"Oh, erm… well I'm here for a check-up mostly. I'm going to be trying to get pregnant very soon, so I wanted to make sure everything's fine," Hermione told the woman, admiring her neatly styled long brown hair.
"Ah, of course. You've taken the Ministry up on their deal regarding reproducing with Draco Malfoy then?" Healer Thomas asked her.
"I have. He's here somewhere for his check-up too. It's part of the deal that everyone has to be checked out before they begin attempting to conceive," Hermione explained.
"Alright then, let's take a look shall we?" Healer Thomas smiled, "Now I'm going to do a series of spells that will test your levels of fertility, your overall health and your current pregnancy status. If we find anything abnormal we'll do some further tests, alright?"
"Alright," Hermione nodded.
"Wonderful. Well, if I could just get you to lie back on the bed there and lift your jumper, we can jump right in."
Hermione did as she was instructed, keeping quiet on the questions she had while the Healer muttered healing spells. The first one, Hermione recognized as being a Diagnostic charm, which showed that she was currently healthy. The second was one Hermione assumed to test her fertility, an array of colours in a misty haze rose from her stomach like a tiny rainbow formed with vapours from a potion.
"You've been taking a contraceptive potion recently, correct?" the Healer asked her.
"Yes. I stopped last night. And I started drinking Lotus Mango, Red Raspberry Leaf and Chasteberry tea," Hermione told her, concerned by the little frown on the Healer's face.
"Chasteberry?" she confirmed. Hermione nodded, "That explains it then. It's very unusual to see a colour pattern like this. Especially when a patient has been taking contraceptives. But if you've been taking those herbs in a tea then it explains most of them. How did you get your hands on some Chasteberry? They're very rare here and use of them is often discouraged because of the effect it has on fertility levels in women. Due to your age, you're already at your peak levels of fertility, and the use of the herd has resulted in these colours, ordinarily we see some blue and red, but orange and green are unusual."
"Should I stop taking it?" Hermione asked, "My house elf gave it to me. He's very pleased about the idea of me having a child with Malfoy."
"Elves are funny like that. But that explains how you got hold of it. Elves have been using Chasteberry to assist their Mistresses and Master for centuries. You can keep taking it if you like. My understanding of these deals is that the sooner you're pregnant, the sooner you get all your incentives. Not to mention that you and Mr Malfoy have an unfriendly history. I assume you're not thrilled over the idea of needing to copulate with him more than you have to?"
"That's right," Hermione nodded, "We've agreed to this because the incentives were too valuable to be turned down and are otherwise unattainable. But we don't fancy each other or even particularly like one another. The less time spent having to shag him in order to fall pregnant, the happier I'll be."
Healer Thomas chuckled at that.
"Well, then keep taking those herbs. I'll give you some supplements to take as well, to help with readying your body for child bearing. It's serious business, making babies. And magical pregnancies are particularly hard on witches. Let me just do one more test to confirm you're not already pregnant, and then we'll discuss some options to make this easier for you."
The healer waved her wand over Hermione's stomach one last time and a series of little red bubbles rose seemingly from inside her skin, levitating into the air for a foot before popping.
"Alright, excellent. You're not currently pregnant. The bubbles would've been green if you were," Healer Thomas told her, smiling reassuringly, "Now then, pregnancy is a science and there is a lot more to it than just having sex. The timing has to be right. Pregnancy is only possible when you are ovulating, so with you and Draco being unwilling to copulate more than necessary, I recommend timing your intimacies to your ovulation cycle."
"Ok. How do I do that?" Hermione asked.
"Well every woman has a window of ovulation during which pregnancy is most likely to occur. What type of schedule does you cycle keep?"
"Twenty-eight days, like clockwork," Hermione replied, knowing her menstrual cycle well.
"Wonderful. Now, to calculate your window of ovulation we count the days. When was the first day of your last period?" the Healer asked.
"Twenty-three days ago," Hermione admitted, "It went for five days."
"Excellent. So you're due for another any time now?"
"I believe so," Hermione nodded.
"Alright. The fertile window in a woman is the five days preceding and the day of ovulation. In women with a cycle like yours ovulation typically happens on day fourteen of the cycle, beginning the day your next period starts. That means that if you get your period today or tomorrow, then that is when you start counting. The window within which you are most likely to fall pregnant will begin nine days after your period starts and will increase in likelihood up until day fourteen. If the egg is not fertilised in that time it will die and your body will begin readying for you next period. Do you understand?"
"You're saying the best chance I have at falling pregnant quickly is to spend a week shagging Malfoy after my next period stops?" Hermione said seriously.
"You need to be exact about the days to get it right, but essentially yes. The more often you copulate during that fertile window, the higher the chance is that you'll get pregnant. Depending on the stamina of yourself and Mr Malfoy, having sex as often as possible during that window is ideal," Healer Thomas explained.
"I don't suppose it would suffice to simply have sex on day fourteen?" Hermione asked, dreading the idea of telling Malfoy that they ought to spend a week emulating bunnies and shagging until neither of them could move.
"You could try it, but if you are too late or it is unsuccessful you would have to try again the following month," the healer told her sympathetically, "However, despite your misgivings, the method of spending the week together and shagging regularly would go a long way towards smoothing the way for your pregnancy. I understand that the Ministry requires you live and sleep together for the length of the pregnancy?"
"They do," Hermione sighed.
"Well in my experience spending such a prolonged and intimate time together early on does wonders for alleviating awkwardness. Currently you and Mr Malfoy are bordering on hostile allegiants, only working together for your rewards. If you're going to have a child together and be in each other's lives to raise it, that will need to change. What better way than by participating in sex until you can't see straight and don't care anymore if he sees you naked or has to hold your hair while you throw up?" the healer smiled encouragingly, "As I said Hermione, magical pregnancies are hard on witches. It's one of the reasons we encourage our young people to reproduce early. You'll need Draco's help during the months of your pregnancy far more than you realise right now."
"Why did I even agree to this?" Hermione muttered to herself, not at all liking the sound of the healer's plan but seeing the logic behind it.
"How do you plan to go about overcoming the initial awkwardness for the first time?" Healer Thomas wanted to know.
"I honestly don't know. It was weird enough when he hugged me in thanks for agreeing to this idea earlier. How are we supposed to snog and get naked and shag?" Hermione asked, feeling frustrated and embarrassed.
"You could always get drunk," the healer told her, smiling now, "We've yet to find a scientific correlation between alcohol consumption and pregnancy rates beyond the carelessness intoxication brings, but I've found many people prefer this method. Have dinner with him, have too much whiskey and then have sex. One of the supplements I'm giving you will increase your libido, making you want to have sex more than you regularly might. That should help. Alcohol will remove your inhibitions and take care of the rest."
"I thought of that, but how much am I likely going to need to drink before I can forget he's Draco Malfoy, the boy who was cruel to me for seven years from the moment he met me?" Hermione asked.
Healer Thomas laughed at that.
"I'm not sure, but you'll figure it out. From now on I want you to take one of these tablets with breakfast every morning and another at night before you go to bed, alright? They're vitamins and things that will help ready your body for carrying and birthing a baby. When you return to Hogwarts you'll be under the care of Madam Pomfrey once more, and I'll be sure to owl her your medications and things. Come back and see me after you Window of Ovulation closes and we'll test you again to see if you're pregnant."
Hermione nodded, taking the bottle of pills she was handed and putting them in her bag, understanding that she was being dismissed.
"You'll be fine Hermione, I promise," Healer Thomas reassured her as Hermione was leaving the room feeling nervous, "Witches and Wizards have been reproducing since the dawn of time, often with people they didn't much like to begin with."
Hermione tried to smile, though she suspected it was more of a grimace. She left the exam room and returned to the lobby of the Hospital, meaning to step outside and apparate home, but when she reached it she spotted Malfoy sitting in one of the waiting room chairs.
"Malfoy?" she asked, going over to him, noticing his distraction.
He looked up at her for a moment as though he didn't recognise her before he blinked rapidly.
"Granger?" he asked, sitting up straighter, "How did you go?"
"Fine," Hermione told him, "Kreacher's teas have already begun increasing my fertility levels."
Malfoy nodded, seeming distracted, glancing towards the doors every few seconds.
"How did your examination go?" she asked, cheeks pinkening slightly as she took a seat beside him.
"Swimmingly," Malfoy said, throwing a smirk her way that was rather lecherous.
"Thank you for that image," she replied dryly, realising he was referring to the fact that they'd have had to test his 'swimmers' to make sure he was fertile.
"Any time, Granger," he promised.
"Have they brought your parents in yet?" Hermione asked him.
Malfoy sighed, "Not yet. I'm going to wind up here all day at this rate."
Hermione bit her lip.
"We need to discuss what happens now," Hermione told him seriously.
"Now's the easy part Granger," Malfoy told her, glancing at her.
"Could you look less lascivious please?" Hermione requested of him when she noted his leery expression. She suspected he was doing it because he was fretting about his parents, "You and I don't particularly like one another and so I'd like to suggest that rather than wildly climbing into bed with one another we time this to the window when I'm actually able to fall pregnant."
"There's a window?" Malfoy asked and Hermione could tell she had his attention.
"There's a window. It's called a window of ovulation, which is the only time during each month when the egg is released and awaiting fertilisation. Outside of that window pregnancy is practically impossible."
"When's this window?" he asked, looking mildly alarmed by the discussion of the inner workings of the female reproductive system.
"Days nine through to fourteen of my menstrual cycle," Hermione informed him, "Outside that time I can't get pregnant so there's not point having sex then. The Healer recommended that during the window we shag as often as possible…."
"Is this your way of coming onto me, Granger?" Malfoy smirked at her, looking wickedly amused when she blushed crimson.
"Malfoy!" Hermione warned.
"Sorry," he chuckled, "It's funny watching you blush like that. So what exactly do we have to do? Just shag like bunnies for six days straight?"
"Basically," Hermione nodded, "Which begs the question of how you think that will go."
"Are you asking how virulent I am, Granger?" he smirked again and Hermione kind of wanted to thump him.
"I suppose I am," she answered, trying very hard to keep from blushing again.
Malfoy's smirk widened into an entirely predatory smile.
"My current record was five times in one day. And that was only because the witch started complaining about being sore. I think I can handle shagging you for six days straight," He bragged.
"I feel ill," Hermione announced and Malfoy chuckled.
"You won't by the time I'm through with you," he promised lecherously, "When do you need me?"
"Must you word it like that?" Hermione demanded, entirely uncomfortable with the question. And with the notion that she needed him for anything. Especially when he said it in that particular flirtatious tone.
"I must," Malfoy nodded, feigning sincerity, "That blush on your cheeks is rather endearing."
"It's as though you enjoy upsetting me," Hermione complained, crossing her arms and turning in her seat to face the doors rather than continuing to look at his stupid face.
"You've been away from me too long if you've managed to forget how much I enjoy tormenting you, Granger. Of course I like upsetting you. You play along so well every time," Malfoy said and Hermione shuddered when he casually threw his arm around the back of her chair, fingers tugging gently on her pony-tail.
"Well quit it," Hermione snapped at him before realising she was only encouraging him by reacting, "Since I don't think you'd be able to come to my place for a week of sex without Harry and Ron trying to kill you, I suppose I'll have to come to yours. Does that suit you?"
"It's fine," Malfoy nodded, his attention turning from her and back to the doors as they opened suddenly to reveal several Ministry officials, levitating a pair of unconscious people dressed in prison robes.
Hermione watched the way Malfoy shot to his feet at the sight of his unconscious parents. She barely recognised the once proud and regal-looking Malfoy pair. Both appeared to be unconscious, hanging limp as they were levitated into the room. The Ministry officials were calling out to have some healers come and see to them and the few other people in the waiting room all turned to watch on in a fascinated kind of horror as Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy were brought into the hospital.
Draco had to be restrained when he began trying to shove his way through the gathered officials and healers to reach his parents, his expression tight with worry and concern. Hermione was the one who ended up restraining him. She could tell the Ministry officials didn't want to risk upsetting the blonde man any further, and that more than one of them was a little concerned over how he might react if told not to interfere with his own parents.
"Malfoy!" Hermione said sternly, moving through the officials until she was able to take hold of Draco's arm.
"Get off me, Granger," Draco snarled at her, turning steely grey eyes on her furiously when she began tugging his arm to get him out of the way.
"Stop being a complete git and get out of the way so the healers can do their job!" Hermione snarled right back at him, not flinching or backing down in the face of his fury, "All you're achieving right now is prolonging their current state. Now, move!"
With that said, Hermione hauled none too gently on his arm until he was out of the thick of everything, pulling him over to the side of the waiting room. Malfoy protested in the form of several expletives while the healing team swept away levitating his parents along with them.
"What do you think you're doing Granger?" Malfoy demanded as she finally released him.
"I'm doing you a favour, so you can shove that tone of yours somewhere unpleasant! You're not helping your parents or yourself by trying to rouse two people who've been sedated for their own health and protection. When the healers have dealt with the worst of their current ailments I'm sure you will be notified but until then you're just going to have to behave yourself and rein in your frustration," Hermione said sternly, all too used to dealing with angry, emotional teenage boys who were being irrational. After all, she'd spent seven and a half years tolerating the wild moods and behaviours of Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley. One mildly irate Draco Malfoy was a breeze.
"You can't tell me what to do Granger!" Malfoy snapped at her, yanking his arm away from her when she went to reach for it again.
"Oh I see," Hermione snapped as he began storming down the corridor the way the healers had gone with his parents, "No, you're right that makes sense. Make the sacrifice of having to have a kid with me in order to get your parents freed and then refuse to allow the healers to do their job and keep your parent's minds intact. Why didn't I think of that plan? It makes total sense."
Hermione knew she'd gotten through his haze of worry and frustration when he stopped midstride, spun and stomped back towards her, seizing hold of her biceps too tightly and glaring down at her.
"Shut it!" he commanded in a low voice, "Just stop talking, Granger."
"Not until you stop being a git. You didn't go through all this to see them damaged in the last few feet. I personally don't like your parents and so it matters little to me if you want to risk their further mental unhinging, but since I'm going to have to put up with you in some capacity for the rest of my life, it wouldn't be right to put you through having a child with me whilst allowing them to remain unhinged."
"Are you always this insufferable?" Malfoy demanded, shaking her a little.
"Are you always this much a stubborn fool?" Hermione retorted.
He made a noise of frustration before releasing her once more and continuing on down the corridor. Hermione didn't really know why she followed him. It was true that she didn't much like Lucius or Narcissa Malfoy. She didn't much like Draco either. She supposed it could be put down simply to morbid curiosity. She wanted to know what kind of state both of them were in after a prolonged stint in Azkaban.
When Draco stopped in front of a door with a glass pane in it, Hermione knew his parents must be inside that room. He turned the handle quickly and disappeared inside before Hermione followed him.
Right into the mayhem within.