Disclaimer- I do not own any of the Total Drama characters that I choose to torture—I mean put in the story! They are merely here for mine, and your amusement. No profit is being made off of this (No one would would stoop as low as to pay me for this anyway) I give all credit to the creators of Total Drama, as well as Johnny Depp, because...well, he's Johnny Depp!
Notes From The Depths of Sarcasm- Sorry that this episode came out a later than I wanted it to, something called school is happening (Sigh), plus my train of thought ran into some writers block, so sorry to anyone who panicked! Luckily, this chapter is eventful, long, and funny, at least in my opinion. But in other news, we've hit the 100 review mark! Honestly, I can't thank you guys enough, you are awesome! However, if you want more TDUB, I'm gonna need your help! I still have a few episodes that I don't have challenges for! I'd appreciate it if you would PM me any ideas you have! The fate of TDUB rests in your hands! Well, sort of. You'll get quite a few episodes before I need help, but I want to get it started now.
In other news, I do have another competition story out if you didn't already know. It's called The Ridonculous Reboot and is essentially a remake of the first season with the addition of two teams, some new locations, and even some new challenges, so I encourage you to check it out, and as always leave a review and hit that Fav/Follow button if you haven't already! Thanks! ;)
Now, with respects to all you amazing people who reviewed and got this story to 100 reviews! Once again, you're all awesome and I'll try to think of something to reward you with...Perhaps a non-competition story of sorts?
Review Replies:
boobooJohnson1: I only brought them in for this chapter as cameos. Basically, they got to compete for one epic zombie challenge, and then they go back to the Playa. So technically, they never entered the competition, so they're not out either. Also, yes I do ship SkyXDave, not heavily, but yeah.
Totally Not A Horse: Thanks! I know you guys love your Gravity Falls references, so I'll try to put as many in as possible, as long as they pertain to the story. This reference is actually one of my favorite Gravity Falls moments so I had to include it, and I think Noah, Katie, and Harold fit the roles of Dipper, Mable, and Grunkle Stan fairly well. Sam was just there because he sort of had to. :P
Soup not Soap: Thanks! I realize it's about half and half for the NoCo, some people like it, others don't. I personally am indifferent, but since there is a good amount of people who don't like it, I'm sorry to say it will not be a pairing for this season. However, since there's an equal amount of people who do like it, I will put more teases in there. ;)
NerdyNightStocker: Yeah, it was more or less an accident that Tyler and Brick didn't take out Jo, but whatever, it worked out in the end. I'm glad you liked the chapter, and there will be more Gravity Falls references to come! ;)
Creaturemaster: No problem, and thanks for the review!
Icetundra: Thanks! Yeah, the zombie one was bound to be gory, and this story won't stay kid-friendly forever, but I'll keep it clean for the most part. As for B's screen time, he will get plenty in this chapter.
Commander Meat: Thanks for the review, and I did the lighter tone after Bridgette gone mad because I felt like her part was a bit too serious, and I didn't want it to be depressing, I'm glad it didn't change your view of the chapter though! Also, Courtney may not have had to vote because Noah picked her, but if not, then thanks for pointing that out!
Guest: Yeah, I'm really sorry about that. School hit me like a brick with homework, and then I ran into a lot of writers block this chapter, but it's finally out so i hope you enjoy! And thank you for the compliment! ;)
Chapter 12 (Day 09)- The Fast and The Delirious!
"Last time on Total Drama Unfinished Business!" Chris recapped. "Our contestants got up-close and personal with a horde of zombies, often more than once! The goal was to either reach the top of McLean Hospital, or get to the Docks, and let's just say, it was difficult for both teams!"
"The VR proved to be too much for Bridgette after a dramatic confrontation with Rodney about Ezekiel. Needless to say, you can find what really happened on the director's cut, this is a family show! That beside the point, there was a lot of zombie take downs, and a lot of take downs by zombies. Shawn and Sam returned just for this episode to act as team captains, and let's just say Shawn and Jasmine kicked butt after going up against a zombie Dakotazoid!"
"Katie, Noah, Sam and Harold blew the heads off of a stadium of zombies after a rockin' performance that shattered their skulls!" Chris grinned as footage of the epic zombie slaying was shown. "But the worst part for everyone was when Scarlett and Izzy sabotaged the Hospital team, lighting off their flare at the beginning of the game, causing great distress for both teams!"
"In the end, Jo was voted out due to her take-no-prisoners attitude, and the fact that she fed Cody to a zombie shark in the first five minutes. Who will be fed to the Boot of Shame this episode instead? Find out on this speedy fast episode of Total...Drama...Unfinished Business!"
~Theme Song (I Wanna Be Famous)~
(Outhouse Confessional- First of the Episode)
Amy- "Ugh!" She growls. "Looks like I need Sadie more than I thought. Either that or people need to stop being stupid!" She glared at the camera. "Cody could have been gone, but no, Jo had to go and screw up my plans and get eliminated instead! I'm going to need one more member of my alliance, and I think I have an idea..." She grins. "Where Courtney goes, Duncan follows."
Brick- "Yes! Jo is finally gone!" he cheered, pumping his fist. "Too bad I wasn't her downfall, but now that she's gone, I can finally play the game without teases and taunts! Plus, I found a new friend in Tyler! He'd make a fine cadet one day." He said, giving a salute to the camera.
The contestants had gathered at the bonfire pit, each of them either sitting on the stumps, or standing because they got there after all the seats were taken. Instead of Chris standing behind his oil drum like he usually did for the elimination ceremonies, he stood in front of the bonfire which still had some wisps of smoke drifting off of it from the early morning hours.
"Today's challenge will test your wit, speed, and skills on the road!" Chris declared. "That's right, it's about time we did a car race!"
"Aw yeah! Two awesome challenges in a row?" Duncan asked, pumping his fist. "Chris man, I hate you a little less!" He grinned and crossed his arms.
"Thanks, you have no idea how much I don't care." Chris smiled.
B raised his hand. "Um...B?' Chris asked raising an eyebrow. Everyone leaned in, listening intently to see if B would actually speak for the first time. The inventor cleared his throat with a cough.
And then he began doing a series of hand signals including, a few rude hand gestures. He smiled and Chris just stood there, confused. "Um...what?" Noah asked. "I think he said something about Eva's uni-brow." To this, Eva got up in Noah's face and growled at him, holding up her fist threateningly.
"B wants to know if we'll be constructing our own cars." Dawn translated. "Oh, and those other hand gestures were just for fun." The contestants raised an eyebrow at this. "What? I took a summer course on sign language." She explained.
"Oh, that makes sense." Katie nodded. "Who was your teacher?" She asked curiously. "I hear sign language is the hottest thing now, everyone at my school is doing it."
"Omigosh, I heard that too!" Sadie added.
"My teacher was Mother Earth, of course! I listened to the changes in the wind and the tea leaves. If you listen closely, you can hear their whispers." Dawn told them.
"Bogus." Scott scoffed and rolled his eyes.
"But I thought you said you took a summer course." Katie said, puzzled.
"I did. I spent the entire summer up in my Meditating Tree listening to Mother Earth's teachings. I also learned Russian, French, Swedish, and Mandarin Chinese." She chirped. "You should join me for my morning meditation sessions! Especially you Bridgette, you seem in need of some comfort, and what better comfort than Mother Earth!" She smiled.
Bridgette sniffed, still torn over the last challenge. "You know what, you're right! I think I'll join you tomorrow morning, feel free to wake me up when you head out." She smiled back.
"Enough with the friendship!" Chris complained. "I'm trying to explain the challenge to you guys!" He said.
"Yeah dorks, listen up! I wanna get right to this challenge." Duncan grinned, cracking his knuckles.
"It's nice that someone cares." Chris glared at the crowd of teens. "Any-who, today's challenge is a race across the island and back. You'll be divided into four teams of six, and one team of five, and you must construct your own racing vehicle!" Some cheers were heard from contestants like Duncan, Izzy and Geoff. B was also cheering, but in a silent manner.
"Once your car is constructed, you'll race it all the way to the other side of the island, stopping at two checkpoints along the way. Once at the other end of the island, you'll find a third checkpoint where you'll turn ninety degrees and head back here for the finish line, also stopping at two more checkpoints. At each checkpoint you'll find a flag. You must grab one or you're team will be rejected at the finish-line. You can only win if you cross the finish line with all five flags." Chris finished.
Next to him, a flat-screen TV was rolled in by Chef. It showed a map of the large island of Pahkitew. Five glowing yellow markers symbolized the checkpoints, and a red line creating a triangle showed the path they should take.
"To make things more interesting, there will be traps along the way to slow you down, so be careful! Along with traps, you'll find yourselves driving through several different biomes, as we have set up the entire island for this challenge! From the searing hot desert, to the buggy jungle, to the frozen mountains, yes, you'll be driving through it all!" He declared.
"Oh, and before I forget, there's one more thing I want to add." Chris grinned. "Chef, dressed as a cop, will be chasing you the entire race! If he catches you and gives you a ticket, you'll have to go back to the last checkpoint, circle it, and then continue on with your race, which will put you very behind! The last two teams to cross the finish line will be heading to the elimination bonfire ceremony where they will kick off another unfortunate soul from the game!"
"Wait, how did Chef change into that cop outfit so fast?" Noah asked. "Wasn't he just wearing his usual cook garb?"
"Chef works in mysterious ways my bookworm, he works in mysterious ways." Chris said in an odd, spooky tone. The contestants just looked at him funny.
Scott raised his hand. "Is there sabotage?" He asked with a snide grin.
"Why yes, yes there is! In fact, it's strongly encouraged! So, build your vehicles carefully so you're not left out of the attacks!" Chris said, rubbing his hands together maniacally.
"Now if there are no more questions, it's time for the teams!" The host pulled out an index card. "Team 1 will be Duncan, Amy, Katie, Courtney, Scott, and Sadie, just to stir up the drama." Chris grinned wickedly. Courtney silently fumed as Amy grinned.
Team 2 will consist of Owen, Scarlett, Izzy, Geoff, Noah, and Max!" Chris continued. Scarlett face-palmed upon hearing her teammates, while Owen and Noah high-fived. Geoff shrugged while Izzy let out a cheer and bounced up and landed on Scarlett's shoulders.
"Get off of me you psychotic red-head!" Scarlett snarled.
"No silly, that's what you are!" Izzy giggled and grabbed Scarlett's glasses from her face. She put them on her own face and looked around with a blink. "Wow, do I need glasses? These make me see fine."
"No you moronic weirdo!" Scarlett hissed. "They're part of my act, now shut up and never speak of this again!" She whispered.
"As I was saying, Team 3 will be Dawn, Harold, Eva, Bridgette, Samey, and Rodney!" Chris went on.
Dawn and Bridgette smiled, leaving Samey to sigh. "Oh don't worry Samey, I haven't forgotten about you." Dawn chirped, putting a hand on Samey's shoulder.
"Yeah, I haven't talked to you much this season, this car race will be a perfect chance to get to know each other!" Bridgette smiled.
"You guys are lucky to have me." Harold said matter-of-factly. "I took a summer camp called Mechanic Steve's Mechanic Camp where I learned how to build a car, dismantle a car, and build another one." He said proudly.
"Sure," Eva rolled her eyes. "My only concern is if you can even lift a wrench. But even if you can't, we've got muscle head over here to do the heavy lifting." She jabbed a thumb a Rodney.
"Team 4, you guys will be Tyler, Dave, Jasmine, LeShawna, B, and Sky." Chris listed.
Jasmine and Sky high-fived while Dave looked on in disgust. B grabbed Dave's hand and fist-bumped with it and smiled at the Germophobe who just scoffed. LeShawna and Tyler seemed to be out of place, so they stood by each other.
"And finally, Team 5, with five members instead of six ,will consist of Heather, Trent, Brick, Cody, and Gwen." Chris finished.
Heather and Gwen eyed each other with frowns on their faces. Trent watched the latter from a distance, as did Cody. Brick just looked at his team and sighed. "Alright platoon, stand down. If we want to win, we have to work together!" He said, getting in between Heather and Gwen.
"You know what? Brick's right. I don't like you, and you don't like me. But we both want to win, so we might as well play nice until it comes to that." Heather agreed.
Gwen rolled her eyes. "Watch it around this one. She's trouble." She whispered to Brick, and the Queen Bee glared at her again.
(Outhouse Confessional- Heather? Nice? I thought we were gone from the Halloween chapters!)
Heather- "Brick may not be attractive in anyway, but if there's one thing I've learned from watching the fourth season, it's that he's loyal. If I can convince him into an alliance, I'll have Tyler with him too! I practically have Cody wrapped around my finger after being so nice to him back in World Tour, so this alliance is already off to a great start." She said proudly.
"Alright campers! It's time to split into your teams and get building your vehicles! Anything goes, as long as there are no bombs, guns, self destruct buttons, or anything else that could harm others or their property. Scarlett and Duncan, I'm looking at you!" He barked, to which the aforementioned teens smiled sheepishly.
"You'll have one hour to build and perfect your cars before the race begins! And for the parts, you have this massive junk pile to sort through!" He shouted as a zoomed out view of the island was shown. There was a gigantic pile of trash going from the bonfire pit to the Mess Hall, spanning most of the beach and blocking the cabins from being seen.
The contestants gaped at the giant pile of spare parts. "When the race begins, you'll have a ten minute head-start before Chef comes after you on his road hog!" Chris declared as Chef was shown on top of his red and silver motorcycle. "Your hour begins now! Get building!" He declared, and the teams scrambled to get to work.
(Team 1 – Amy, Katie, Sadie, Courtney, Duncan, Scott)
"Back on the farm, pappy and I used to fix up cars for a small fee, so I know a thing or two about cars. Especially pick-up trucks!" Scott grinned proudly.
"Yeah, well I'm a punk who has an idea for a car, and you're not gonna stop me. This isn't about Courtney anymore, this is my time! Your time is when we do a lame challenge like smashing rats with baseball bats!" Duncan sneered as he grabbed a steering wheel from the junk pile.
"Um, hello! I'm right here!" Courtney snapped. Behind her, Amy was filing her nails with a bored expression, barely listening to half of what Duncan and Scott were saying. Sadie was whispering something into Katie's ear as she peered at Amy every so often.
"So what if you have a vision? This is a team effort, and I have some good skills!" Scott argued, ripping the steering wheel from Duncan's hands.
"Oh yeah, like when you sabotaged your own team a while back?" Duncan retaliated. "I wouldn't call that being a team player!" The punk yanked the steering wheel out of Scott's hands.
"Exactly, that was a while back! I don't do that anymore! Did you even pay attention during the All-Star season? I made it to fourth place, and I would have gone to the finale if that moronic red-head hadn't chosen Mal!" Scott snapped back. "You got disqualified after trying to prove you were a bad boy! Look what good that did you! I bet you arrived here fresh from prison."
"Yeah, well now my bad-boy self is back! Besides, we're on a totally different island. No little blue birds in sight!" He cross his arms. "And if there was one, I wouldn't waste my time on it. I'd hike out into the woods and take on a bear instead, or even another Psycho-Killer with a Chainsaw and a Hook!"
"Psh, whatever." Scott scoffed. "C'mon Courtney, take my side! Duncan cheated on you, how can you trust him to make our car for the race?"
Duncan and Scott both looked at Courtney expectantly. Courtney sighed. "Duncan's in charge. He knows his way around the car parts. Scott, you can help him." Courtney instructed.
Duncan grinned devilishly at Scott who looked like he'd just been hit in the gut with a bowling ball. "Are you kidding me?!" he cried. "Fine. I'll help him. But if we lose, you know who to vote for." He said.
"Aw, thanks princess." Duncan said in a teasing tone. "I knew I could count on you." He grinned. Courtney glared at him and walked off. "If you wanna kiss me like in those Speed and Speedier movies, I might just let you."
Courtney stormed away off screen. There was an odd pause, and suddenly a wrench was hurled at Duncan, hitting him square in the face. "Gah!" He cried as Scott snickered.
"That said, Scott, you go sabotage the other teams." Courtney said. "It'll ensure we win. I suggest starting with B's team since he'll probably make a flying car." Courtney rolled her eyes.
"Why me?! Why should I be the one to sabotage! I told you, I'm done with that!" Scott complained.
"Yeah, well you're the only experienced one." Courtney said, to which Scott narrowed his eyes. Courtney looked back at Amy, who still wasn't paying attention, and then she leaned into Scott's ear. "If anyone sees you, tell them Amy made you do it, got it?" She whispered.
Scott nodded and Courtney grinned. "Good. Now, go sabotage and maybe I'll change my mind about Duncan." She said, tracing down Scott's nose seductively. She walked off with a flip of her hair, and while Scott couldn't see it, she was grinning slyly.
(Outhouse Confessional- Crafty Courtney!)
Courtney- "I think for once in this game, I'm actually in a good position! So far, I have Amy's alliance which seems to be doing good. If that fails, I always have Scott and Duncan to fall back on. As long as I keep them on their toes, they'll do anything for me." She grinned.
Scott- "Maybe Courtney finally changed her mind! I mean, I never really got an A in debates back in school, but I think I made a pretty good case against Duncan. As far as I'm concerned, that punk thinks he's gonna kiss Courtney on this road race, but in actuality, she'll be kissing me!" he snickered.
Duncan- "I saw what Courtney was doing with Scott, and am I worried? No." he scoffed. "I've spent four seasons with Courtney, and I know that she's up to something. She's probably making Scott think she likes him, when she actually likes me." he chuckled.
(Team 2 - Geoff, Noah, Owen, Scarlett, Izzy, Max)
"I command you to make a Maxmobile!" Max declared, putting a finger in the air dramatically. "Since I am your future overlord, I will sit back and watch you build it. If it is to my liking, I will not drop you in a lava pit when I become ruler." He said in an oddly polite tone.
Scarlett glared at him and felt for the vile of mutagen. She grasped it and her hand shook as she stopped herself from doing anything she might regret. She exhaled and let go of the vile. "As you wish your majesty." She said in a mocking tone.
"And why exactly are we taking orders from the miniature leader of North Korea?" Noah asked Scarlett as the two walked off towards the pile of junk. "Seriously, when are you going to end him? He's starting to bug the crap out of me."
"True, he is an irrefutable moron, but I need him for my reasons." Scarlett said. "Trust me, I'd get rid of him if I could." She grumbled.
"And why can't you ditch him? Why do you need him?" Noah asked. "In my opinion, Max is nothing more but a childish wackjob. I see no reason to keep him around."
Scarlett sighed. "The reason I'm keeping Max around right now is because he's like a wounded gazelle. He's easy prey. If someone goes after me, I can always shove Max in harms way. Basically, one of these days, people are gonna figure out that I haven't changed, and when they do, they'll want to get rid of me as fast as possible. Solution? Vote off Max with my alliance. That would at least buy me some time to get something figured out."
Noah nodded. "I suppose that makes sense. Unfortunately it'll be a while before that time comes. This is a long season, and you can't pull anything big as long as there's a bunch of people left." he told her.
"Trust me. I've got things planned out." Scarlett said, reaching for the vile in her pocket again, just to make sure it was there. Noah eyed her suspiciously.
"What's in your pocket?" He asked.
"A death laser, anymore questions?' Scarlett replied sarcastically.
Noah put his hands up defensively. "Hey, let's not get hasty. Just go find some car parts and put them together. I may not be obsessed with cars like Duncan, and I'm sure you aren't either, but with our massive brains, we can come up with a decent vehicle." He said.
Scarlett nodded and began digging through the junk pile. Noah turned around to look through another mound, but was surprised to see Owen blocking his path. "Hey, buddy. Could you move, you're kind of blotting out the sun." Noah remarked.
"Heh-heh, sorry!" Owen apologized. "I need your help! I really wanna ask out Izzy during the car race, it could be like one of those movies where there's a smooching couple in the back seat! I wanna bring it back to the good old days!" He said dreamily.
"You mean the days when Izzy pulled you into a bush and you made out and then got hauled off by a psycho-killer with a chainsaw and a hook?" Noah asked.
"Exactly!" Owen said. "But the problem is, every time I ask her out, I always mess up! I don't want to mess this one up, I mean look at her, she's gorgeous!" He motioned to Izzy who Digging through junk piles.
The red-head wore a tire on her head, and a smaller one around her legs. She bent down and picked up a discarded steering wheel and stuck it in her cleavage. She began twisting it as if she was driving a car. "Hey look Owen! I'm a car! Vroom-Vroom!" She cackled with a crazy look in her eye. Owen sighed happily and watched his crush.
"Yeah...that's attractive." Noah rolled his eyes. "So what do you need me for?" He asked.
"Well, since I always seem to mess up, I was sort of thinking that maybe you could ask out Izzy for me!" Owen explained. "So, will you do it?" Noah opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted when Owen suddenly got down on his knees and tugged on Noah's sweater-vest. "Please! I beg you!" He cried.
"Whoa, calm down dude!" Noah shouted, wrenching Owen's hands from his shirt. "I'm not exactly the best at asking girls out, but I have a pretty good idea. I guess I could do it for a small fee of course." He grinned.
"How much money?" Owen asked desperately.
"Whoa, I don't want your money." Noah said. "God knows where it's been." he muttered under his breath. "I want you to..." the rest of the conversation was cut off when Noah leaned into Owen's ear and whispered the request.
Owen gasped. "Do I have to?" He whined.
"If you want to go out with Izzy, then yes." Noah nodded. "Now, do we have a deal?" Owen sighed and shook Noah's hand. "Good, I'll ask her during the race, that way, if she rejects you, I can comfort you in the back seat." he said all to enjoyably, and patted his friend on the back.
"Yay! You're the best, buddy!" Owen exclaimed and grabbed Noah in for a bear hug. The cynic didn't have any time to escape before the wind was squeezed out of him.
(Team 3 – Harold, Eva, Bridgette, Dawn, Samey, Rodney)
"Get to work, dork!" Eva commanded. "You're the only one here who knows how to build a car."
"Right you are M'lady." Harold said with a bow. "Now, first we need to find an engine. All the other teams will be looking for one later, but if we get one first, we won't have that problem!" Harold dug through a small pile of junk and low and behold, he found a motor. "Jackpot!" he grinned.
The lanky nerd reached down and picked it up. Except that he couldn't. Harold stood there, frantically trying to pick up the engine but to no avail. He pulled on it, pushed on it, and tried to prop it up with his foot, but nothing worked. "This engine must be reinforced with titanium! I can't even get it an inch off the ground."
Eva rolled her eyes and walked over. With one hand, she proceeded to grab the engine, and lift it up above her head without a problem. "Reinforced with titanium, eh?" She said, unamused. "Grow some muscles you weakling!"
"Okay, I may not be the best at lifting, but trust me, I know my way around vehicles." Harold said matter-of-factly. "How about I work on the car, and you hand me the parts." He suggested.
"If it'll get this thing done faster." Eva grumbled. "Yo, overalls, come over here and grab some spare car parts!" She hollered at Rodney. The farm boy was sitting on a rock, watching Amy from a far, sighing. "RODNEY!" Eva barked.
"Wah!" Rodney cried, flailing his arms and falling off his rock. "Ow! Sorry, I'm on it!" He said, getting up and running over to the junk pile.
"Aura girl, Malibu barbie, and cheerleader, you guys just search the piles for anything useful. If you find something too heavy for your tooth-pick arms to carry, come find me." Eva instructed.
"We have names you know." Bridgette said, glaring at her. "You were gunning for me in season one, how could you not know my name?"
"Well, I don't know their names." Eva shrugged, pointing to Dawn and Samey.
Bridgette sighed. "The aura girl is Dawn, and the cheerleader is Sammy." Bridgette told her. "Not Samey."
"Whatever, Samey, Bridgette, and Dawn, go find useful stuff." She said and with that, she disappeared amongst the massive piles of junk.
(Outhouse Confessional- Is Jo back?)
Eva- "What? I'm not good with names! My anger-management coach never said anything about remembering peoples names. My strategy is to ignore them and maybe they won't anger me." She shrugged.
Bridgette- "You know those New Years Resolutions everyone does? Well, even though it's not the new year, I'm going to resolve to be nice to Eva, and try to become her friend! Now, I know no one ever stays true to their new years resolutions, but since it's not technically new years, maybe it'll work!" She chuckled.
(Team 4 – Tyler, LeShawna, B, Sky, Dave, Jasmine)
"Alright Jasmine, you wanna be unofficial team leader?" Sky asked, getting a ready position. She was jogging in place, her adrenaline pumping, ready to win the race.
"Sure, I guess." Jasmine shrugged. "And I know just what to do. B, you build the entire car." She said quickly. Everyone looked at the silent genius, and he grinned and shot a finger-pistol at the Australian survivalist.
"Well he seems to fine with that." LeShawna shrugged. "Should we go look for parts? I don't want to be useless, LeShawna always has a use." She said.
"Same here, my skills are too good to be wasted." Tyler nodded. There was an awkward pause, completed with cricket chirping and everyone looked at him. "I have skills!" he protested.
"You keep telling yourself that." Noah grinned smugly as he walked by. Before Tyler could argue with him, the bookworm disappeared into the piles of junk.
"Okay, fine, maybe I'm a little clumsy, but I still have skills in sports!" Tyler said. "My point is, I don't want to be useless. It's never a good feeling." He shook his head.
"Alright, we'll go look for parts, B will construct it. B, wanna make a list of what you need us to find?" Jasmine asked him. B nodded and picked up a conveniently placed pencil and notepad and began writing stuff down.
"Well I for one am not going to go searching for parts." Dave shook his head. "This massive junk pile is crawling with germs! I feel dirty just standing here!" He shivered and hugged himself. "I've got to go take a shower! Come get me when the race starts!" He screamed, running off towards the communal washrooms, frantically rubbing his arms.
Sky face-palmed. "Watch out for the-" Jasmine was cut off when Dave tripped over an abandoned toilet and landed face-first into a small pile of trash.
"AAAAAAAAAAUUUGH!" Dave screeched, getting up and looking at himself. He was drenched in liquified garbage, a banana peel on his head and a wet piece of paper hanging limp over his shoulder. He squealed like a terrified pig and bolted for the showers.
"To be honest, he wouldn't have been much help anyway." Sky shrugged. "B's doing all the building and he would have refused to look for anything."
"That's no way to talk about a team member! Sure, he's pretty useless, but you don't say it out loud! Instead, you try to help him get better and become more if use!" Tyler said.
"Sorry, he just angers me." Sky sighed. "It's complicated."
(Outhouse Confessional- Germy germy germs!)
Dave- "I really want to prove to Sky that I'm a force to be reckoned with and that she shouldn't have cheated on me, but my Germaphobia is getting in the way! I bet Chris made this challenge just to spite me!" He glared at the camera and crossed his arms. "I'm gonna go take another shower." He whimpered.
Sky- "Right now, Dave is just annoying me. He don't like him, and I don't hate him. He's just...annoying!" She sighed, trying to look for a different word. "Okay, so I still like him a little, but I also hate him a little. I don't know where I am." She covered her face and shook her head.
(Team 5 -Trent, Gwen, Heather, Cody, Brick)
"Alright, we may be down a member, but that doesn't mean we're not a force to be reckoned with! We've got four original players on our team, each one of you placing pretty good in a season." Brick said, pacing back and forth in front of them. "All we need to do is work together and we can win this!"
"Brick is right! We can do this!" Cody said, putting a fist in the air triumphantly. "I mean, my label is the Tech Geek. I might be able to figure out how to build some of a car."
"Back home my mom made me go to a summer camp where we made small wooden cars." Gwen side. "Mine was complete with an engine and Goth wings." She grinned.
"Whoa! Send me a picture!" Cody exclaimed.
"That's beside the point, soldier." Brick said. "Private Gwen, private Cody, you two are in charge of building the vehicle since you know enough about them." He instructed. "Trent, Heather, and I will search for parts!"
"Ew, no way am I looking through this pile of garbage! I might break a nail or contract some sort of gross disease! There's probably like twelve rats running around here!" Heather complained.
"Would you rather be voted off if we lose?" Gwen asked. "Because I doubt you could convince anyone to vote otherwise."
Heather thought for a moment. "Ugh, fine." She grumbled. "But if I get bitten by a rat or get some sort of weird disease, I'm blaming you weird goth girl."
"We've been on four seasons together and you're still calling me that?" Gwen questioned. "Weak."
(Outhouse Confessional- The Gothic Outhouse! Say, that could be a nice name for a band!)
Heather- "Actually Gwen, I could have convinced other people if I had Brick on my side. Right now, I need to work on getting Brick into my alliance, thus gaining Tyler and joining the two with Cody and I." She explained. "Of course I can't let her know that.
Gwen- "Obviously Heather's trying to form an alliance with someone. My bet is that Cody has something to do with it. After I was eliminated in World Tour, she and Cody were pretty buddy-buddy, so I wouldn't put it past her." She scowled. "I just hope I can convince Cody otherwise, but to be honest, I don't think that will be too difficult."
Chris McLean- "We found most of the construction footage to be pretty boring, so we skipped ahead towards the end, but not before a quick little montage!" He winked.
(~What Follows is a Brief Construction Montage~)
B was shown taking a hammer and hammering his car, which was not visible yet. A large cloud of dust appeared as he began using a power drill. The only evidence of B's awesome creation was the gaping mouths and wide eyes of his teammates.
The scene switched to Harold working on his car. So far there wasn't a whole lot of design to it, just a basic structure. Suddenly, the lanky nerd heard a noise from the engine. He raised an eyebrow and opened the hood, only for a raccoon to leap at his face and begin clawing and scratching at it. Harold cried out and tried to pulled the creature from his face. Meanwhile, Scott watch from behind a junk pile and snickered and then scampered off.
Next was Cody. He was wiring the car and currently had a red wire, a blue wire, and a green wire in his hands. He looked puzzled and decided to put the blue and green ones together. Suddenly, there was an electrical zap and the electricity surged through his body, causing his hair to stand on end.
Scott was seen holding what looked like a small, circular, black cartoon bomb. The small rope at the end was lit, and the flame was getting closer to the bomb. Scott set the explosive inside the hood of Scarlett's car and his behind a stray stack of tires. Scarlett walked over and opened up the hood, only to get an explosion to the face. When the smoke cleared, her surprised expression was covered in soot. Scott snickered deviously and tiptoed away.
(~We Hope You Enjoyed This Brief Construction Montage~) [1]
(Outhouse Confessional- Scott the Saboteur)
Scarlett- "Whoever set that explosion off inside the hood of our car will pay dearly. When I find out who it is, they will be gutted on the spot." She snarled.
Harold- He has several bandages and scratches on his face, and is currently applying a band-aid. "Gosh! That raccoon was mean! Luckily, I was a Muskrat Boy, so I knew how to take care of it." he said proudly.
Cody- "I've got to remember! It's always the red wire, not the blue one." He shook his head. "Well, it's a good thing I'm not colorblind!" He chuckled.
Scott- "Sabotaging the other teams reminds me of the good-old days back in Revenge of the Island. Too bad I accidentally flung Chris into the washrooms, if that hadn't happened, I totally would have won!" He snapped his fingers. "But I won't be going back to sabotaging. Well, unless Courtney says to."
"Let's see the cars!" Chris declared after about an hour had passed. The teams had finished their cars and some, like Duncan, where just finishing adding the finishing touches like paint and hood ornaments. "Duncan, you're up first, and I don't think you'll disappoint!"
Duncan stood next to what looked like a miniature version of the Statue of Liberty covered in a sheet. He grabbed the sheet and yanked it away, revealing his car, which looked nothing like the Statue of Liberty.
The car was almost like a hot-rod, but not quite. It was silky black with flames painted on the sides. There was no roof to it it and the engine was exposed, a skull hood ornament on the front bumper.. Two pipes on either side extended under each car door and ended at the back of car as if fire was about to spew from them any minute. Sharp metal spikes extended from the car just above the back wheels.
"I call her Vanessa." Duncan grinned, rubbing the engine. Nearby, Courtney crossed her arms and roller her eyes while the rest of her team awed at the punk mobile.
"Nice! I'm sure this'll be a real challenge to go up against!" Chris grinned, rubbing his hands together maniacally. "Speaking of challenges, it's time for the former Psychotic murderer and the annoying cynic to show us what they've got! Scarlett, Noah, you're up!"
Scarlett's eye twitched at Chris's latest comment as she yanked the sheet from her vehicle, revealing it to be very large and long. The front was a small semi-truck two-seater with horns extending from the top, making it appear as though it was the devil's truck; the fact that it was red didn't help.
Behind the semi was a large, wooden flatbed that could easily carry their entire team. Up towards the front of the flatbed was a large metal hamster-wheel, perfect for a person to run on. In front of it was a small table with a slice of pie sitting on it.
"Uh...it's certainly interesting..." Chris said, at a loss for words. "What's with the giant hamster wheel? The mutants didn't escape the Fun-Zone, did they?" He quickly panicked.
"No you moron. We're using the power of Owen." Scarlett stated. "Since engines aren't always reliable, we decided to use energy that would last as long as we needed it to: Owen's love for food."
"As long as he keeps running after the pie, we're golden." Noah grinned proudly.
"I'm impressed!" Chris nodded. "And I see you've added a rocket launcher to the back?" The camera panned over to the end of the flatbed to show that there was indeed a rocket launcher nailed to the back.
"Of course. It's not a bomb, and it'll only cause major damage to their vehicle." Scarlett explained. "You said sabotage was allowed."
"Indeed I did!" Chris smiled. "I love it, don't change a thing!" Scarlett grinned approvingly. "Now, Harold, you're up!"
"Behold!" Harold shouted as he yanked the tarp off of his car. "I call her Lady LeShawna!" An anticlimactic tune was played as the car was shown. It was a rusty pick-up truck with one of the doors replaced by a wooden one. One of the back wheels was also wooden. A pile of random junk sat in the back seat, along with a wimpy sling-shot.
"We brought you a bunch of junk so you could just make more junk out of it?!" Eva cried. "This thing is a piece of crap!"
"No it isn't! It's an artistic use of wood and spare parts!" Harold protested. "And I named it after my fair LeShawna! How dare you call it crap!"
"Harold, rename it." LeShawna ordered.
"Yes M'lady." Harold sighed and sulked.
"Well, that was lame." Chris chuckled. "B, please save us from Harold's suckitude." The camera panned over to B who was holding his sheet, which was covering a tiny looking car. He smiled smugly and nodded, yanking the sheet away.
Instead of the tiny car you would expect, the sheet being pulled off revealed the thing to be nearly twenty times larger than you would think. It was a hulking black monster truck with the front painted to look like a literal monster face with gnashing teeth and a snake-like tongue.
"How dose he do that?!" Noah wondered.
"He must've found a cool monster truck structure. Maybe he got lucky and found some cool junk." Geoff shrugged.
"No, the sheet thing! How did that tiny car under a sheet turn into a hulking mass of metal?!" Noah cried.
The monster truck had spikes on the hub of each wheel, and a tennis-ball launcher was positioned on either side of the truck at the top. B pressed a button on a remote in his hand and flames spewed from the rocket engines in the back.
"Wow." Chris said, mouth agape. "That is one bad monster truck!" He grinned. "Who else agrees that B wins the prize for best car?" Immediately, everyone put their hands up, even the competition. "Cody, Gwen, it's gonna be hard to out-do that!"
Cody gulped and pulled off the tarp from his car. It was a small go-cart with two seats in the front, and three in the back. It was green with a black and white checkered pattern along the side.
"Yeah, out-do it has not." Chris deadpanned. "Well, overall these are some pretty cool cars! Haul 'em over to the starting line and we can get this race started!" He exclaimed, jabbing a thumb behind him where the checkered starting line sat.
All five cars were lined up at the starting line. Chris stood on a large platform to the side with a megaphone in one hand, and a large checkered flag in another. A few feet behind the cars, Chef sat on his road-hog. He was still wearing his Cop outfit, but his motorcycle had been refurbished with a siren, flashing lights, and it was now blue and black, like a police motorcycle.
"On your mark..." Chris began. Duncan, on the far left, revved his engine, and B, who was in the middle, did the same. "Get set..." Footage of the team drivers placing their feet on the gas pedal, ready to zoom off were shown. "GO! Let the carnage begin!" Chris declared through his mega-phone and waving the checkered flag in the air.
Almost immediately, the cars flew off onto the trail in the forest. Chef revved his motorcycle engine and prepared to go after them. "Not so fast Police Chef, you've gotta wait ten more minutes!" Chris shook his head.
Chef glared at the host and pulled out a pad and pencil. He began to scribble something down and when he was finished, he hopped off his motorcycle and slapped the piece of paper onto Chris's pant-leg.
The host grabbed it and read it. "Ticket for being annoying?!" He cried. "That is not an actual offense! Maybe I should make your time fifteen before you can go after them!"
Chef shook his head and revved the motor of his motorcycle again. He grinned and Chris grinned back. "Or maybe I'll just 'accidentally' let you go right now!" He chuckled.
Chef nodded his police hat to the host, and with that, he was off after the cars. Unfortunately, not two yards into the forest his motorcycle his a pot hole and went flying over the handlebars and into a tree.
The cook quickly regained his vision and got right back up and on his chopper. He revved the engine once more and flew off through the forest, making sure not to his any debris. Chris waited until Chef was out of sight, and then he face-palmed.
(Team 1 – Amy, Katie, Sadie, Duncan, Scott, Courtney)
"You named the car Vanessa?" Courtney asked. "That's a stupid name." She rolled her eyes. "It's just a dumb car."
"It's more than a car, it's my girl." Duncan grinned, rubbing the steering wheel and even giving it a kiss. He slammed the gas pedal and their car rocketed forward with a rev from the engine. They passed Team 3 and Team 5, but hadn't caught up to B's monster truck, or Scarlett and Noah's flatbed.
Suddenly, there was a crash of shattering glass and Duncan looked back only to have a toilet plunger hit him in the face. Amy, Katie, and Sadie were sitting in the back and all of them had ducked out of the way to avoid being hit. "What the heck?!" Amy growled, shaking her fist at the car behind them. It was Harold's pickup truck, and they had just launched the plunger from their slingshot...through the windshield. Harold was driving and Eva was launching. She grabbed a hammer and soon it was flying.
Katie and Sadie screamed and ducked into their car as the hammer sailed over their heads, imbedding itself on the floor in front of them. Scott and Courtney were up front with Duncan, as the car had six seats all together.
"No one launches a hammer at Vanessa!" Duncan snarled. He pressed a red button next to the steering wheel and suddenly a pine cone launcher popped up on the back of the car. Amy grabbed it and began firing furiously.
A shot from the camera showed that the pine cones were coming from the road ahead of them. A small tube under the car suck any pine cone within five feet into the launcher. Several of the forest projectiles hit the car, but didn't much. A few of them hit the windshield, and one even smashed through a section of the windshield since it still had a branch attached to it!
Eva grabbed a screwdriver and put it in the slingshot. The construction tool soared through the air in a spiral. It collided with Duncan's car, drilling a small hole into the back. Duncan's expression turned from mad, to angry. He stomped on the gas pedal and began to swerve continually, causing Eva to miss her shots, each projectile being launched caused a part of Harold's windshield to be smashed.
"Eva! Stop breaking my beauteous car!" Harold shouted. "You smashing the windshield!"
"It's a piece of crap anyway! You're lucky it's still moving!" Eva hollered, ignoring Harold and launching more projectiles through the windshield.
(Outhouse Confessional- No Road Rage in here)
Courtney- "Obviously the only reason Duncan isn't falling all over me is because of his new car, Vanessa." She scoffed. "What? I'm not jealous. It's just a dumb car! And besides, that gives me a chance to work more on Scott." She shrugged. Before the camera cut out, it managed to catch her eyes twitching.
Duncan- "Courtney is obviously jealous of Vanessa." he chuckled. "But one is a roaring monster with fire in its eyes, and the other's a car!"
Scott- "Things are actually looking good for me! Now that Courtney is jealous of Duncan's new ride, she'll come crawling back to me!" He grinned. "At least I think that's what's supposed to happen. My pappy didn't really tell me much about girls..."
(Team 2 – Scarlett, Noah, Geoff, Owen, Izzy, Max)
"Run faster Owen!" Scarlett demanded. The loveable oaf was running as fast as he could after the pie. Unfortunately, he was stuck in a giant hamster wheel, and the pie was on the other side.
"Can't...reach...the pie!" He wailed.
Behind them, Geoff and Max were sitting on the flatbed, the latter on an old recliner, and the former waving a palm frond over Max's head. "I command you fan me faster minion!" Max shouted. "You are doing a very good job." he complimented.
"Uh, thanks bro." Geoff shrugged. "So when's it my turn to sit in the recliner?" He asked.
"Never! I am your overlord, thus you shall do what I say! It's simple Tyrannical over-ruling." Max explained.
"Uh...Tyrannosaurus rulers? What does this have to do with dinosaurs and math? I thought we were in Canada, not Costa Rica!" Geoff said, scratching his head. [2]
"Fan me faster, minion!" Max shouted again. Geoff yelped and continued waving the palm frond over Max's head much more vigorously.
Inside the actual semi truck portion of the car, Noah was in the front seat, and Izzy was in shot-gun. "Hey, guess what?" Izzy asked Noah.
"What?" Noah replied with a deadpan. "Make it snappy, I'm trying to concentrate on driving."
"MONSTER TRUCK ON THE PORT BOW!" Izzy screeched. Noah screamed in surprise and spun the steering wheel, even though B's monster truck was ahead of them.
"Izzy don't do that!" Noah snapped, not noticing that their flatbed was veering off-road.
Izzy pointed ahead. "What?" Noah asked. He turned to see a bear in their pathway, looking into their headlights like a scared deer. Izzy whooped while Noah screamed as they plowed right into the bear.
Somehow, the bear had ended up in the driver's seat and was currently twisting and turning the steering wheel, not knowing how to drive. Noah's hands and feet were shown sticking out from under the creature, indicating that he had been squished.
"What's going on back here?!" Scarlett shouted, yanking open the door into the front seat. Her answer was met with a terrified roar from the grizzly bear.
"...And the yellow light means 'speed up'." Izzy told the bear as Scarlett watched with amazement. The bear had both hands on the wheel and let out another roar. Suddenly, there was a police siren and red and blue lights flashed from behind them. Scarlett face-palmed as Chef came up to the window.
"Stop your vehicle!" He snapped. Izzy slammed on the gas pedal for the bear, causing Scarlett to fall over with a surprised cry.
Izzy rolled down the window. "What seems to be the problem officer?" She asked with a grin from ear to ear. She didn't even acknowledge the bear in the driver's seat, which was currently chewing on its seat belt.
"There better be a good explanation for this." Chef said, getting off of his motorcycle and standing in front of them with a pad of paper and a pencil, ready to give them a ticket.
"Oh, there is!" Izzy said seriously. "You see, I'm a crazy teenage girl, not able see, so the doctors assigned me a seeing-eye bear to drive me to the hospital in case of emergencies."
"Is that so? Then where's your doctor's note?" Chef asked suspiciously.
"Why it's right here in my bra, good sir!" Izzy said pulling a pencil from her pocket and quickly writing something on a piece of paper in her cleavage. "There ya go!" She handed it to Chef who took the paper with a raised eyebrow.
Chef looked at the note. It read: Izzy is sick and needs a bear. -Dr. Medicine. "Well, I can't argue with doctor medicine." Chef shrugged.
"To the hospital honey-pants!" Izzy cackled, making a hands signal. The bear growled and drove forward leaving Chef behind. [3]
"Wait a second!" he exclaimed. "You get back here, crazy girl!" he snapped, tossing the note behind him and hopping onto his motorcycle. Izzy's wild cackles could be heard as they continued to drive ahead.
(Outhouse Confessional- Blind Bear Driver)
Noah- "The worst part is that Izzy let the bear drive for three more miles until we reached the first checkpoint!" he muttered. "I think I've still got bear fur where bear fur should not be!"
Scarlett- "I just need to get in the driver's seat and talk to Noah about the alliance. I sense that some people may be catching on to my rouse." She said. "I need to discuss a plan with him, of course no one else can know."
Izzy- "I think I could make some money off that bear!" She grinned. "Everyone's seen a bicycle-riding bear, but no one's seen a car-driving bear! Oh yes, I will teach that bear to drive." She cackled.
(Team 4 – B, Tyler, LeShawna, Sky, Jasmine, Dave)
Team 4 was currently in first place, driving ahead of the other teams. The checkpoint was just up ahead, but there was one problem: B's monster truck was much too tall.
"How are we supposed to get the flag?" Sky asked.
B just sat back and grinned smugly. He pressed one of the many buttons on his console and suddenly, a mechanical hand extended from the car door, all the way down to where the checkpoint was.
The checkpoint was a red cylinder with a black and white checkered pattern trim. Five flags were attached to it and they came off easy. The robotic hand reached down and grabbed one of the red flags from the checkpoint, and pulled it up to the window where B grabbed it and tossed into the back seat. It landed in Sky's hands and she stared at it in shock.
"And he did that all without stopping!" Jasmine chuckled. B flashed her a thumbs up and got back to looking at the trail ahead of them.
"Uh, have you guys noticed that it's getting darker?" Dave asked.
"Yeah, and these trees don't look native to Canada. They look more like they belong in South America if you ask me." Jasmine observed, looking out the window of the back seat.
"Ah! Mosquito!" Dave screamed. He was on the right side of Sky, Jasmine on the left. He batted at the air, trying to kill the mosquito. "Get away you blood-sucking spawn of Satan!" He shrieked.
"I think we've changed biomes." Jasmine declared. "We must be in the rain forest biome, Chris did say we'd go through buggy jungles."
"Yeah, well it's too buggy if you ask me." Dave whimpered. Jasmine and Sky turned to see a giant, black, hairy tarantula on Dave's face. The Germophobe was staying still, breathing heavily.
LeShawna and Tyler looked behind them, into the backseat and saw the tarantula. LeShawna immediately let out a scream and kicked Dave in the face, sending the tarantula flying out the window, shattering some of the glass. Dave let out a pained cry and clutched his jaw.
"My aw!" He whined. "I hink oo oke it!" He said without moving his jaw.
"Hold still." Jasmine instructed. The Australian put one hand under Dave's chin, and the other on the top of his head. She then pushed up with one hand, and pushed down with the other, creating a sickening crunch as Dave's jaw was pushed back into its socket.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUGH!" Dave screamed in pain. "Hey, it feels better!" He sighed with relief once the pain had left his jaw.
"Sorry, spiders just freak me out!" LeShawna shivered. "I'm a tough girl, 'grew up in a tough neighborhood, so I'm not scared of a lot of things, but spiders just terrify me!"
"Dude, you're still afraid of spiders?" Tyler asked. "No offense, but I thought you'd be over that by now, it's been like, three years."
"Don't judge me! You're probably still afraid of chickens, chicken!" LeShawna snapped back. Tyler sighed and sulked in his seat. "That's what I thought." LeShawna said, crossing her arms.
(Team 3 – Harold, Eva, Bridgette, Dawn, Samey, Rodney)
"Chef must've been real mad at another team to just pass us like that!" Harold observed as they snagged their flag from the checkpoint. Chef raced ahead of them, only having eyes on Team 2. Behind Harold's car, Team 5 raced by the checkpoint, being the last ones to snag their flag.
"Oh yay! We've entered the jungle, home of the most beautiful creatures and plants!" Dawn chirped, looking at the scenery around them. She, Samey, and Bridgette sat in the back of the pick-up truck, along with Rodney who was off by himself. Eva and Harold sat in the front seat, and shot gun respectively.
"Should I concentrate my mind on the plants and animals to avoid thinking about Ezekiel, Geoff, and what happened last challenge?" Bridgette asked with a gulp.
"Oh yes, the flora and fauna of the rainforest are most beautiful!" Dawn said. "Focusing on them will surely take your mind off of the distractions in your mind! Once we're well into the race, we can begin meditation."
Bridgette nodded and inhaled deeply, and then exhaled. She looked around at the nature around her. The extravagant leaves, the colorful flowers, and the melodious chirps of birds all around them.
Suddenly Bridgette screamed, alerting Dawn and surprising Samey. "Zombie monkey!" She shrieked.
Dawn raised an eyebrow. "I don't recall any zombie primates from the zombie challenge..." Dawn thought back. She looked up to see a monkey had leaped at Bridgette and was now howling and calling out as it danced around on her face. Then, more appeared.
One monkey shot down from the trees, crashing through one of the side windows and into Eva's lap. The monkey let out a shriek and began wrestling with Eva, unfortunately for the primate, Eva was much stronger, and the monkey was hurled out the window.
"Please stop!" Dawn cried.
More monkeys poured out of the treetops and there were now at least a dozen of them. They were banging on the car, bursting through windows, and stealing the junk from the back of the pickup. "Hey! Stupid monkeys! Gosh! You're blocking my view!" Harold shouted as he swerved, moving his head as he tried to look at the trail ahead of him. A monkey was on the windshield, howling right in his face.
One monkey grabbed a planter and swung it at the back of the driver's seat. It easily cleaved through the rusty metal and flew through the windshield, causing Harold to promptly run it over. As he did this, the car shook and jolted and then finally smoothed out. "Dang monkeys! You're tearing up my artwork!"
"It's a piece of crap! If anything, the monkeys are helping it!" Eva remarked as she back-handed a monkey out the window.
"Dawn! You're, like, an animal whisperer, do something!" Samey cried dodging a flying monkey coming at her. She used a garbage can lid to deflect any other monkeys coming at her.
"Ah! The monkey's got my kiwis!" Rodney cried, suddenly holding up a bag of kiwi fruits. Samey and Bridgette's eyes had widened at the comment, and they now breathed a sigh of relief.
(Team 1 – Amy, Katie, Sadie, Duncan, Courtney, Scott)
"I wanna drive!" Scott complained. "Let me drive! You can't hog the steering wheel the whole time! We should switch off every so often!"
"No way loser! This is my baby, and no one else is gonna drive it!" Duncan snapped. "Besides, if you drove it, you'd probably run it into a tree, you redneck! I don't want to see a scratch on my car after this race, and guess what? That won't happen since I'm at the wheel!"
"Gimme that steering wheel!" Scott snarled, reaching for it. Duncan drove with one hand as he used the other to shove Scott's face away, resulting in the farm boy frantically trying to reach for the wheel while his face was pushed against.
"No!" Duncan shouted. Scott stopped reaching for the wheel and grabbed Duncan's arm. "Let go!" Duncan snapped. "It's my car, I drive!"
"You're steering us into a tree!" Scott shouted, continuing to yank on Duncan's arm.
"Because you're distracting me from the road!" Duncan shot back. "Gah! Come here!" He snarled, grabbing Scott with both hands and shaking him violently, letting go of the steering wheel. Courtney, who was also in the front seat screamed and grabbed the steering wheel, swerving away from the tree just in time.
Meanwhile, in the back seat, Amy, Katie, and Sadie were screaming in terror as the car rocked back and forth as Courtney tried frantically to steer from two seats over. "Quit fighting each other and watch you road you morons!" She hollered.
"Ha! Thank you pappy!" Scott grinned. He had hog-tied Duncan to a stick and had balanced him over the car. "I guess he was right, that knot tying class really did come in handy!" He snickered.
"You think this is funny?! Wait till I get out of these ties you /censored/! You'll wish you were on the road getting run-over!" Duncan snarled. He wriggled in his ties but to no avail.
"Ew! Get your butt out of my face!" Amy whined, leaning out of the way.
"Well excuse me! I didn't want to be tied up and have my butt hanging half-way into the back seat!" Duncan snapped. "Maybe you should get your face out of my butt!"
"Maybe you should be nicer to Duncan. He did build us this super cool car." Sadie said.
"Whatever, it's ugly anyway." Amy scoffed. "He's just lucky it's fast." Katie bit her lip nervously.
Scott had grabbed hold of the wheel and was now furiously racing down the trail, plowing through several smaller trees. "Don't you dare get a scratch on Vanessa!" Duncan barked.
Due to the swerving of Team 1's car, Team 3 managed to pull ahead, even with the monkeys in their way. "Oh my! Stop running through those poor defenseless trees!" Dawn cried, watching Scott pave over the trees from the back of the pick-up truck.
"Oh look! A rat, just like the kind I used to smash with my pappy!" Scott grinned. "Bonus!" He stomped on the gas pedal and zoomed forward, heading straight for the defenseless tiny rat.
"DON'T YOU DARE!" Dawn roared, much to everyone's surprise. "Protect your fellow creatures and Mother Earth, children!" She declared, casting a finger in the direction of Scott's car. The monkeys obliged and leaped from their car onto Duncan's ride.
Scott screamed as one of the monkeys began clawing at his face. He swerved, tilting the car almost on its side, barely missing the small rat. Dawn breathed a sigh of relief. "That was a close one."
Courtney screamed in terror and grabbed hold of the steering wheel again, narrowly avoiding another tree. One of the monkeys jumped at Duncan, clawing at him. The punk managed to lean out of the way so the monkey clawed at the ropes he was tied in. Soon, they came free and Duncan managed to free the rest of his limbs.
"Alright, it's pay back time!" Duncan snapped. "Vanessa, this is for you!" He growled, punching a monkey that came at him. He ripped the monkey from Scott's face and threw it behind him. He then proceeded to punch Scott in the face, effectively knocking him out onto the floor. The punk then regained control of the steering wheel.
"Just in time too, the next checkpoint is ahead!" Courtney said, pointing ahead of them. By now, most of the monkeys had abandoned ship and were now retreating back to the trees.
"Sadie, are you okay?" Katie asked.
"Yeah I'm fine, but you might want to ask Duncan. Amy might have hurt his feelings." Sadie sneered.
"Oh please, punks don't have feelings!" Duncan rolled his eyes. A few seconds later, they came upon the next checkpoint and Duncan snatched the flag on the way by.
(Outhouse Confessional- Outhouses have feelings too!)
Amy- "Okay, Sadie is really starting to bug me now! Something tells me there's no going back, she thinks she can take me on? Well she's got another thing coming!" She snarled. "The only problem is Katie. That toothpick is best friends with Sadie, she'd never vote her off! I need some way to split the two apart..." She thought.
(Team 2 – Scarlett, Noah, Owen, Izzy, Max, Geoff)
"I think we lost Chef a few miles ago." Noah said from the passenger seat. Scarlett had taken the wheel and was driving much better than the bear.
"Yeah, I saw him hit a tree stump and land in a small pond." Izzy said from the floor. "He won't be able to catch up to us even if he tried!" She chuckled.
"Izzy?! How long have you been there?!" Noah exclaimed.
"Ha-ha! I never left!" She grinned wildly.
The change from rainforest to desert was instant. Noah looked back to see that there was a fine line keeping the foliage of the jungle back from the sands of the desert. "Great, from hot and steamy to hot and sweaty." Noah grumbled. Currently, there was nothing but sand, the occasional cactus, and the trail marked out. As the flatbed passed through the desert, dust clouds kicked up behind them.
Meanwhile on the flatbed part of the vehicle Max was sweating. "Yikes, that jungle was mighty steamy!" He exclaimed. "Perhaps too steamy for his highness. Evil does not like saunas."
"Fanning faster, sir!" Geoff said quickly, waving the palm frond more frequently over Max's head.
"No, no, you're doing fine. I just require some water is all." Max said. "Stop this vehicle! I command it!" He declared. Geoff gulped and dropped the palm frond and ran for the driver's seat.
He opened the door into the seats and popped his head in. "Uh, Max wants to stop for a drink of water, could you, like, stop?" Geoff asked.
"You've got to be kidding me!" Scarlett complained, slamming her face down on the steering wheel. She stomped on the break. "Make it snappy!" She hissed.
Geoff yelped and ran back to Max. "Scarlett says to make it snappy." Geoff told him. "Say, where are you supposed to find water in the desert anyway?"
"Scarlett can't tell me what to do!" Max snapped. "I'll take as long as I want to! As for the water thing, being a genius like myself with this oversized brain, I know that there is a plethora of water inside a cactus." He bragged.
The pudgy scientist hopped off the truck and skipped over to a cactus a few feet away. Suddenly, B's monster truck passed them, and Scarlett's frustrated cry could be heard from the truck.
"Owie!" Max cried as he tried to cut open the cactus, but got poked by one of the thorns instead. He ripped one from the plant and poked a few holes together, creating a bigger hole. "Yes!" he grinned as a small trickle of water seeped out. He tilted his head to get water from the cactus, sticking his tongue out so he wouldn't miss a drop.
This, however, was a bad idea. One of the cactus spikes pricked his tongue and cried out in pain. "Gah! My tongue!" he whined with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. He quickly ran back to the flatbed and hopped back on.
"I ot a cut on my ongue!" He said to Geoff, pointing at his limp tongue.
"Potato chip?' Scarlett asked, coming from the driver's seat with a bag of chips in hand. "Your majesty wouldn't want to get hungry, now would he?" She said.
"Your offer is greatly appreciated." Max said with a slight wince as he felt the pain from his tongue. "I hate you a little less now." He grabbed a potato chip from Scarlett's bag and walked off to his recliner. He took one bite. "NYAYAYAYAYAUGH!" He screamed. [4]
"Dude, awesome." Geoff chuckled, trying to stifle a laugh.
"You are pure evil." Noah grinned.
"Why thank you. Fun with sodium." Scarlett grinned back. With that, she retreated back to the driver's seat, and within seconds, they were moving again. "Two flags down, and only three more to go." She said smugly.
(Team 4 – B, LeShawna, Tyler, Jasmine, Dave, Sky)
Currently, the monster truck was racing through the desert, kicking up alarming amounts of dust and sand behind it. Team 4 had just grabbed their second flag and were now speeding further and further into the desert.
Duncan's team had fully regained control of their vehicle and were closing in on them. "Duncan's car is gaining on us!" Jasmine exclaimed. "They're small enough that you could probably do something with the spikes on the tires." She suggested. "Just hit 'em."
B grinned and pressed a yellow button his control panel. Suddenly, a tennis ball launcher rose up from the seats in the back, right in between Sky and Jasmine. "Alright! You wanna man it, or should I?" Sky asked.
"You can do it if you want." Jasmine nodded, motioning for Sky to take the launcher. B then pressed the yellow button again, and a second tennis ball launcher rose where Jasmine's seat was. She grinned and grabbed hold of it, as did Sky. "Time for some fun!" She shouted over the roar of the engines.
The two girls began to pull the triggers, sending tennis balls raining down on Duncan's car. The punk swerved several times, trying to avoid the balls, but a few of them ended up pelting the sides of the vehicles.
Amy grinned maliciously as a plan formed in her head. "Katie! Watch out!" She exclaimed, pointing to Katie's side of the desert.
"What?! Where?" Katie panicked, turning away from Amy and Sadie, frantically looking around.
"Sadie!" Amy shouted again, this time pointing to Sadie's side of the desert.
"What?" Sadie asked, turning. Amy took this opportunity to grab a stray tennis ball and launch it at Sadie. The ball hit her in the side of the head with a thud. "Ow! What was that for Amy?!" She snapped, turning right around.
"What? That was Katie!" Amy told her, pointing to the thin BFFFL. "I'm just here, trying not to get hit by tennis balls!" She said. Just as she said this, a tennis ball flew from the monster truck, hitting Amy directly in the face.
"Katie! How could you?" Sadie cried, grabbing a ball and chucking it at her friend.
Katie cried out in pain as the ball smacked her in the back of the head. "Sadie! You big meanie!" She growled, throwing one at Sadie's face.
The larger BFFFL rubbed her face and threw another ball at Katie. Soon, the two friends were throwing balls at each other, forcing Amy to duck so she wouldn't be hit.
(Outhouse Confessional- Friendly Fire?)
Katie- "Omigosh, I'm like, so not talking to Sadie again! She threw a tennis ball at me, what the heck?" She exclaimed. "I thought she was my friend!"
Sadie- "How could Katie do that to me! She just threw a tennis ball at my face! Sheesh, you think you know a person." She said. Suddenly, she gasped. "Omigosh, maybe it's because we haven't been doing confessionals together lately! Oh no, I hope it's not that!" She gripped her face in worry.
Amy- She's grinning wickedly. "Now that they're turning against each other, all I need to do is convince Katie to vote off Sadie. I don't care if she regrets it right afterward, as long as I have her vote, Sadie's out of here!" She declared.
Duncan's car soon fell behind B's Monster Truck. B grinned at this and his finger hovered over a red button on the panel. He quickly moved his finger so it then hovered over a larger red button with a skull and crossbones on it. He pressed it, and suddenly, mechanical sounds began erupting from the vehicle.
Team 1 watched in horror as the Monster truck itself turned around while it still moved. The wheels still faced the same way, but the entire seating cockpit turned around, and then, something even weirder happened.
The monster mouth on the truck suddenly roared and came to life! The teeth gnashed as it tried to bite Duncan's car. Everyone on Team 1 screamed as B's car continued to roar and snap its teeth at them. "What the heck?!" Duncan cried. "How is that even possible?!"
"It's B we're talking about, he's a classified genius!" Courtney exclaimed. "He could invent almost anything out of anything!" She cried.
Suddenly, the monster truck's mouth breathed fire, a ball of flame shooting out at Team 1's car. They all screamed as Duncan quickly swerved out of the way to avoid the fireball. "I'm not giving up without a fight!" Duncan shouted.
He pressed a black button on his control panel, and flames shot out of the pipes on his car, propelling him forward. He let out a whoop as his car passed B's monster truck. B saw this and narrowed his eyes, pressing the same skull and crossbones button again. The car once again turned around, the literal monster now facing the back of Duncan's car.
"Time to run like a coward?" Courtney asked.
"Time to run like a coward!" Duncan shouted, stomping on the gas pedal. His car continued to go forward as B chased them down.
The screen suddenly paused on Team 1 screaming as a fireball flew close to their car. "Can Duncan's team escape B's fiery Monster Truck of Death? Find out after the break!" Chris said, popping up in front of the screen.
(~Commercial Break~)
(Team 3 – Eva, Harold, Bridgette, Samey, Dawn, Rodney)
"Did you have to miss the third checkpoint?" Eva snapped. "You're just lucky Duncan and B are battling it out back a ways so we're ahead."
"Let's look at it this way, at least Harold turned around and grabbed the flag rather than losing the whole thing at the end because he didn't." Bridgette said.
"Whatever, but now we're being tailed by Chef!" Eva grumbled . "And it's getting cold." She hugged herself and shivered.
"Yeah, I noticed that too." Bridgette said as her teeth began to chatter. Soon, the sand turned into snow, and the road was paved with ice.
"I believe we've entered the frozen mountains that Chris was talking about." Harold deduced.
"No duh, Sherlock!" Eva rolled her eyes. "Now go faster, I don't want Chef to catch up to us! He may be far away, but I can hear his siren."
Suddenly, the team heard a dinging and looked up ahead to see a toll-booth gate lowering in front of the raceway. On the other side of the bar was a line of small, cute baby penguins. They took their time waddling along, not caring about the car waiting to cross.
"Ugh! This is gonna take forever, and Chef is gonna catch up to us!" Eva complained.
"Aw! Those are the cutest things I've ever seen!" Bridgette and Samey cooed in unison, clasping their hands together.
"Can't you adorable little penguins move faster? Gosh!" Harold exclaimed as the penguins continued to waddle along.
"Nature's beautiful creatures!" Dawn chirped. "Take all the time you need!"
"AAAAAUUGH!" Eva whined.
(~ Several Minutes Later~)
Shockingly, Eva had grown a full beard in the time during the time card and was now angrily shaving it away. "Ugh! This is taking too long!" She shouted, throwing the razor out the window and ripping off the rest of her beard.
"Doesn't that hurt?" Samey asked.
"Yes, a lot." Eva said without showing any pain on her face.
"I think the real question is, how did she grow a beard in such short of time? It's only been like, ten minutes!" Harold said. "It's scientifically impossible, you can't grow a beard in a week, let alone ten minutes!"
"Shut up before I shut it for you." Eva snapped, holding a fist to Harold's fast. "HURRY UP YOU STUPID PENGUINS!" Eva roared. The line of penguins seemed to never end, going for eternity. As soon as one cross the road, another just got onto the road.
"Dawn, could you, maybe like, tell the penguins to go faster?" Samey asked.
"You cannot rush nature, but do not fret, they are almost finished." Dawn told them. True to her word, all of the penguins had safely crossed the road, the last one almost finished. "Hello little bird, could you do me a favor?" Dawn asked.
The penguin nodded and Dawn whispered something to the bird. The baby penguin hopped out of the way, letting Team 3 go by with a "Finally!" From Eva once the gate was lifted.
Seconds later, Chef arrived on his motorcycle, only to be stopped by a dinging. The bar was lowered and the baby penguin whistled. Suddenly, all of the penguins began forming another line, walking to the other side of the road. Chef's eyes narrowed and he slammed his forehead on the handlebars of his bike.
(Team 2 – Noah, Owen, Scarlett, Izzy, Geoff, Max)
"Noah, pst... Noah, hey!" Owen said from his giant hamster wheel. He continued to run after the pie, and looked to be getting very tired. Buckets of Owen's sweat sat around the hamster wheel to collect the perspiration coming from Owen's pores.
"Yeah?' Noah asked, walking over to his friend. "Dude, how are you sweating? It's freezing out here?" Noah asked as he hugged himself for warmth.
"I've been running this whole race, I'm still really hot!" Owen whined. "But hey, we're almost done, we've got two more flags to get!" He said cheerfully.
"Owen...the thing you wanted to talk to me about?" Noah reminded him.
"Oh yeah! You still need to ask Izzy out for me!" Owen said. "C'mon, please! You promised!" He said.
Noah sighed. "Ah yes, I almost forgot." He nodded. "Be back in a sec, and no guarantee that she'll say yes."
The bookworm looked around and spotted Izzy hanging upside-down from the back of the flatbed, her hair just inches from getting run over. "Hey Izzy, I gotta ask you something!" Noah shouted as he walked closer.
"Sure, shoot!" Izzy said. "I mean, don't actually shoot me if you have a gun, that would be bad!" She chuckled. "I mean you can ask the question."
"Yeah, I got that." Noah deadpanned. The cynic gulped. "Uh, do you wanna go out-" His lips moved as he finished his sentence, but Izzy could not hear what he was saying do to the roar of Duncan and B's engines as they raced behind them, still battling each other.
"Go out, with you? Sure!" Izzy chirped. "Sounds fun!" The red-head got up from hanging and got closer to Noah. "Meet me in the communal washrooms during dinner. I'll see you tonight!" She said, tapping his nose with her finger seductively. She then skipped off to do whatever Izzy would do.
Noah blinked. "Izzy, that's no what I-" Izzy ignored him and continued to skip off whistling 'Pop goes the Weasel' quite loudly. The bookworm sighed and walked over to Owen.
"What did she say?" Owen asked as he continued to run. "Wait, don't tell me! I can't take it!" He cried suddenly before Noah could tell him. "Sorry, you can tell me, I can handle the news!" He said firmly. Noah opened his mouth again but Owen interrupted him once more. "No, I don't want to know!"
Owen then launched into a sputter of awkward cries. "IZZY SAID YES!" Noah shouted, stopping Owen's rant. "To me. Apparently I'm going on a date with Izzy tonight." He said.
Owen's jaw dropped. "How could you?!" He cried. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" He bawled, yet still running. "I need comfort food! I want the pie!" He whined.
"Sorry. I'd tell her that she wants to go with you, but there's no talking Izzy out of anything." Noah explained.
"I don't care, jerk! You're a big meanie face and I hate you! Go away!" Owen continued to bawl. Noah sighed and trudged off to do nothing in particular.
(Outhouse Confessional- Nizzy has surfaced!)
Noah- "Okay, I'm going to humor Izzy on this date. The only reason is because there's no talking her out of doing something when she's made up her mind." He muttered. "I hope Owen understands once he's done blubbering." he sighed. "Wait a second...did she say to meet her in the communal washrooms for our date?!"
Owen- "How could Noah betray me like this?!" He cried. "I ask him a simple favor to ask Izzy out for me, and he goes behind my back and dates her! Oh the humanity!" He put a hand to his face, trying to hold back the tears.
(Team 1 – Duncan, Courtney, Scott, Amy, Katie, Sadie)
"How did we grab the flag, and turn while fighting these psychos?" Courtney asked. "I'm amazed."
"It just takes skills, princess." Duncan grinned. "Now then, we should probably pick up the speed before we get fried alive again!" he shouted as another fireball flew from the monster truck's mouth.
"I actually might not mind getting hit by a fireball." Sadie said as she shivered. "I'm cold!"
"Yeah, cold to your best friend when you threw a tennis ball at her!" Katie snapped, rubbing her arms, trying to keep them warm.
"You threw the tennis ball at me!" Sadie accused.
"No, you threw it at me!" Katie argued.
"You!"
"No, you!"
"You threw it"
"No, you did!"
"Shut up!" Amy shouted. "I'm tired of your arguing! Just look in the opposite direction and don't think about each other. The race is almost over anyway, you can go cry into a pillow when you get back to your cabin." She rolled her eyes.
"But we share the same cabin, I don't wanna cry into my pillow if she's there!" Katie said. "Can I cry in your pillow?" She asked Amy.
"No! Amy likes me more! She'll let me cry into her pillow!" Sadie said. "You're just a skinny toothpick with ugly hair!"
"You should talk, you have the same hairstyle! And everyone knows that I wear it better. Besides, what's so wrong with being skinny? At least I'm not classified as a Hippopotamus!"
Tears welled in Sadie's eyes. "How could you say that?!" She bawled. "You're so mean!" She began to cry uncontrollably, and soon, so was Katie. They both began to sob and faced opposite directions of Amy, who let out an annoyed sigh.
(Outhouse Confessional- You can cry into our toilet)
Jasmine- "I gotta hand it to B, he sure can make a car! I was kind of surprised that it could roar, try to eat people, and breathe fire, but hey, it's still cool." She shrugged.
Sky- "Okay, B kinda scares me now. That monster truck was psychotic! I hope that that fire couldn't actually hurt anyone." she said. "Dave would probably want the fire to burn me." She sighed.
Duncan- "The rest of the race was pretty awesome. Scott was knocked out so he wasn't bothering me, and I managed to keep Vanessa out of harms way. At least for most of the time..." He muttered.
(Team 5 – Gwen, Cody, Heather, Trent, Brick)
"Cody, I thought you said you could make a car! This is even crappier than those go-carts in Total Drama Action! We've been in last place this entire race!" Heather complained.
"Hey, ease up on the guy, he did the best he could! Would you rather have no car and have to run the entire race?" Trent asked. "Also, you forgot Gwen, she helped build this too!"
"Thanks Trent, but there's no satisfying Heather." Gwen rolled her eyes with a smile. "Say, isn't that the fourth checkpoint?" She wondered, pointing ahead.
"Good, these frozen mountains are freezing!" Heather complained. "I'm glad this race is almost over, just one more stupid place and then the finish line!"
"And it looks like the next biome is swamp, I see some mangrove trees up ahead." Gwen said. "Cool, swamps are dark and moody." She grinned.
"Woo-hoo! Flag numero cuatro!" Cody cheered as he snapped up the flag on the way by the checkpoint.
"Excellent work, platoon! All we need to do now is make it past two more teams and we'll be safe!" Brick said cheerfully. "Also, you might wanna watch out for Larry." He pointed up ahead.
"Huh?" Cody asked.
"It's actually Laura." Gwen said. "Or Laurie. You know what, who cares, it's a giant plant monster, it doesn't need a gender." She decided.
Since Cody had not competed in Revenge of the Island or All-Stars, he had no idea who Larry was. "Giant plant monster?!" He cried.
"Yeah, from season four." Brick said. "He or she is right up ahead in between those two ramps. See the giant Venus fly-trap mouth? That's Larry. You should probably try to avoid her."
"Well, the other teams seemed to have avoided her, why can't we?" Cody said slyly, stepping on the gas pedal. The go-kart raced forward with tiny explosion from the engine.
"Soldier, I wouldn't do that if I were you!" Brick said worriedly. But it was too late. Cody had raced up the ramp, and was now airborne.
The members of Team 5 all screamed as Larry shot up from its rest position and tried to snap them up. Cody swerved to the right in mid-air, barely dodging the giant plant monster's mouth.
"I thought Larry was contained in the Fun Zone!" Heather cried.
"Chris did say there would be traps." Gwen muttered.
The go-kart landed with a thud on the other ramp, quickly speeding away from Larry as he/she let out an angry and hungry roar. "Cody! That was awesome!" Gwen exclaimed. Suddenly, out of no where, Gwen pecked Cody on the cheek, exhilarating him.
He then got a determined look on his face and stepped on the gas pedal once more. "We can win this!" He declared as they raced further into the swamp.
(Outhouse Confessional- Larry, Laurie, Laura, Lorenzo?)
Gwen- "Okay, it was more of a pitty kiss, but still, he did save us from a giant plant monster. Plus, I can't help but kind of feel sorry for him, he has a really hard life. I decided to give him a break for once. I mean hey, I did it to Cameron." She shrugged.
Trent- "WHAT?! Did she just kiss Cody on the cheek? What about me!" He cried. "Ugh, was she even thinking about me? How could she just go and do that right in front of her ex!"
(Teams Overall)
"And the teams are making their way through the swamp! The last checkpoint is a mile away and then it's three more miles of forest until the reach the finish line, who will win?" Chris asked the audience off-screen.
"Of course, some of these teams might be behind if Chef could actually do his job!" Chris chuckled.
The scene went back to Chef who was still waiting for the penguins to go. "I'm tryin' as hard as I can! It's your fault, you set up this stupid penguin trap!"
"Yeah, but you were supposed to catch the teams when hey got stuck, not get stuck yourself!" Chris scolded. "It doesn't matter now anyway, the other teams are miles ahead, there's no way you can catch up." He chuckled.
"Ah, forget this!" Chef shouted. He popped a wheelie and did a jump right over the line of penguins, hitting the bar and speeding away from them. Once he was gone, all of the penguins burst into little giggles as they fell on the ice, laughing.
Back at the swamp, all 5 teams were within the same range. "It looks like B's monster truck is ahead, followed closely by Duncan and Team 2! Harold's pile of crud trails in fourth, and Cody's go-kart is right on Harold's heels!" Chris announced. "And here comes the final checkpoint before the finish line!"
B's mechanical arm was first to grab a flag, followed by Duncan, who raced right by the checkpoint. Scarlett managed to grab a flag from the checkpoint, but had to slow down in order to get it. Harold also slowed down to get his, allowing Cody to slip right past him while Trent snapped up the flag for Team 5. "And Harold's team is now in last place!" Chris declared.
Even from the overview shot, Eva's angry and frustrated roars could be heard, startling Chris. "The swamp is no more as the teams now trail into the forest! It's still anyone's game as they near the finish line, just up ahead!" A view from B's monster truck showed the finish line to be a small black and white-checkered banner in the distance.
"It's time to give it all you've got!" Chris shouted, and the teams did just that. B launched more fireballs from his monster truck, most of them flying over Duncan's car and setting a few trees on fire, much to Dawn's horror when Team 3 finally got to that point.
Several interns quickly arrived on the scene and put the fires out before they could spread to more of the forest. "Be careful B, I don't want a repeat of Scarlett's rampage from last season!" Chris snapped.
Team 3 launched what little junk they had left since most of it had been taken by the monkeys. Eva continued to damage their own car as she launched a broken radio, a clock, and a desk lamp at Cody's team. All of the objects missed.
"Here they come, who will cross the finish line? First place is coming any second now!" Chris exclaimed excitedly as the teams were now within a mile of the checkered banner.
B pressed the button for fireballs three more times. Two of them flew over Duncan's care, one hitting another patch of trees, and the other landing right next to Team 5.
The final fireball landed right in front of Duncan's car, causing him to swerve in he opposite direction. "VANESSA!" He cried as his black punk mobile hit a tree with a fiery explosion. "My ride! What is it about this stupid island? You can't have anything nice!"
With that, B's monster truck crossed the finish line. "And Team 4 takes first, undoubtedly." Chris announced.
Unfortunately for Team 2, Owen had finally reached his delicious pie, and had conked out on the hamster wheel, still mumbling about Noah's betrayal. Suddenly, Team 2's flatbed came to a halt without Owen's energy running it.
"What the heck?" Scarlett cried.
"I demand to know why we've stopped!" Max snapped.
"You made this excellent car, powered by Owen, but you forgot to get another pie?" Noah asked, dumbfounded. "You've got to be kidding me."
"We're not out of this yet!" Scarlett declared. She grabbed a rope and tied one end to Owen, and the other end to the front bumper of their car. "Everybody pull and throw Owen to the finish line!" She said.
"I think you guys can pull, and I'll sit back and watch." Max said.
"EVERYBODY!"Scarlett roared, her eyes flickering red for a second. Max yelped and grabbed the rope, as did everyone else. "Heave, ho!" They hurled Owen to the finish line, and his weight yanked the flatbed just enough to cross in second place.
"And Team 2 barely makes it over using an...interesting method." Chris said. "Oh, and here come Cody and Harold's teams! Duncan's team still seems to be out of it right now!
Due to the fireballs that had erupted around Team 5, their go-kart was hobbling to the finish line on one wheel. Team 3 was also having difficulties. Their pickup was barely staying together and was at risk of falling apart any second, forcing Harold to drive very slow.
"And it's a very slow race to stay in this!" Chris said. "Cody VS Harold...anybody's game...almost there...and..." Chris started to get bored. "Cody makes third place! Team 1 and Team 3 have lost!" Chris announced wildly.
"AAAAAAUUUUUUUGH!" Eva growled, jumping out of the pickup and kicking the side with anger, storming off afterward.
"And you guys said it was a piece of crap!" Harold grinned at his team and Chris. "Would a piece of crap make it across the finish line still together?" As he said this, there was a rusty whine from the pickup and it suddenly collapsed into pieces and ashes. Harold blinked and then sulked, trudging away.
"Team 3 and Team 1, I'll be seeing you guys at elimination tonight. So, decide who you wanna kick off." Chris grinned.
Duncan got out of his car and rubbed his forehead. "Gah! Vanessa!" He cried. "Ugh, I'm gonna have to rebuild her!"
"Get over it Duncan, it's just a stupid car. Besides, we lost anyway." Courtney huffed.
"No, I'm gonna rebuild this baby, but she's gonna be even better and more indestructible than before!" Duncan resolved. Courtney rolled her eyes and stormed off while Amy got out of the flaming car and grinned wickedly.
Noah left the guy's side of the TDI cabin and headed for the communal washrooms. He wasn't dressed special, just his usual sweater-vest and shorts. He arrived at the washrooms and opened the door.
To his shock, a candlelit chandelier hung from the ceiling and lights lined the walls and stalls. The sinks were covered in a white sheet and only one of the stalls was opened.
Noah raised an eyebrow as he entered the stall, only to see Izzy sitting at a chair, waiting for him. In front of her, the toilet was covered with a white tablecloth. Noah sat down. "Uh, why are we dining in the bathrooms?" He asked.
"Because, it's the only reservation I could get!" Izzy said. "That and it's more private." She shrugged.
"Okay...so where's the food?" He wondered.
Suddenly, the stall door flew open and Owen appeared, dressed as a waiter. "I hired Owen to be our waiter because he's such a kind soul." Izzy cooed.
Owen smiled at Izzy and then glared at Noah who rolled his eyes. "Your food." he grumbled, tossing the plates onto the toilet table. Unfortunately, since it was a toilet, the food went right through the tablecloth and into the toilet.
"OWEN! Get us more food!" Izzy demanded. "And another tablecloth!"
"Will do!" He exclaimed, giving a salute and running off to get more food from somewhere.
"CUE THE MUSIC!" Izzy hollered, clapping her hands together. Suddenly, Chef swung down from the ceiling by a rope tied around his waist dressed like a cherub in nothing more than a diaper with a violin in his hands, much to Noah's horror.
"I don't get paid enough for this." He muttered as he began to play a romantic tune on the stringed instrument.
"Uh, Izzy...as much as I love staring at Chef's butt, can I not have his feet in my face?" Noah requested.
"REMOVE THE CUPID!" Izzy shouted, clapping again. The rope was yanked up by someone, and suddenly Chef could be heard screaming.
"I'm not even going to ask..." Noah muttered.
"I'm back!" Owen declared, bursting back through the stall door. "Your food is served!" He put the new tablecloth over the toilet and set down two empty plates on the toilet, only this time there was a tray under them so they wouldn't fall through the hole.
"Um, Owen...this plate is empty." Noah said.
"I got the munchies." Owen said.
"OWEN! GET US MORE FOOD!" Izzy demanded again. Owen yelped and ran to get yet another plate of food for them.
"Maybe he can actually listen to orders and get the food this time." Izzy rolled her eyes.
"Uh, to tell you the truth Izzy, I was actually asking you out for Owen. He really likes and wants to date you again. He's really sorry for breaking up and please don't tear me limb from limb!" Noah said, putting his hands in front of his face for self-defense.
"Oh silly, I knew that the whole time!" Izzy giggled, throwing his hands in front of her casually.
"Say what?" Noah asked, mouth agape.
"Yup, I just wanted to go on a date with you for all the Nizzy fans out there." Izzy chuckled. "Did you think I actually liked you?"
"Well...yeah. But I'm actually glad that you don't so, it all worked out." Noah breathed a sigh of relief. "So, do you still like Owen?"
"Of course! And right after we're done on this date, you're gonna be the waiter for my date with Owen!" She grinned.
"I'm back!" Owen said. "Again. Here you go!" He set down two plates of identical steak and salad. He paused for a moment, inspecting the plates of food, and then he quickly switched them around.
"Uh, any particular reason you just did that?" Noah asked, taking a forkful of steak and swallowing it. "What, did you poison my food?" He joked.
"Maybe." Owen replied with a devilish smirk.
Noah pushed his plate to the center of the toilet/table, refusing to eat anymore as his eyes widened.. Izzy took a fork and bit into her steak. "Mmm, excellent work my good Owen." She grinned. Suddenly, she noticed a bite mark out of the steak on the other side. "Owen, did you eat some of my steak?" Izzy asked.
"Yeah..." He sighed. "I got hungry! Again."
"Uh, Owen, I feel fine. Are you sure you poisoned my food?" Noah asked.
Owen's eyes went wide in realization. "Oh poop." he whimpered before he suddenly dropped to the floor like a gigantic sack of potatoes inside of a bowl of pudding stuffed into a vat of jello that had been messily crammed into the carcass of a hippopotamus.
"You moron! You just poisoned both of us!" Izzy shouted, suddenly puking all over Owen's waiter uniform.
"Perhaps I'll skip out on being the waiter and instead go get an intern..." Noah said. Izzy continued to heave uncontrollably. "Or maybe a janitor."
(Pahkitew Island Bonfire Bit)
"You all did very well today, except for the part where you came in last!" Chris chuckled. "Excellent footage though, nice wipe-out at the end Duncan, and that monkey footage was awesome Dawn!" He grinned.
Dawn frowned, but remained silent. "Alright, let's get to the votes! Here on my plate have eleven marshmallows. If you do not receive a marshmallow, you must immediately head to the Boot of Shame and get your butt kicked of the island, literally! The following players received no votes: Rodney, Dawn, Samey, Bridgette, Amy, and surprisingly Duncan, Courtney, and Scott!" Chris said, tossing marshmallows to all of them. "What? No love triangle hate?"
Duncan was particularly mad since his car was destroyed, so he decided to flip Chris off. This gesture was promptly censored. Chris just grinned, which ticked Duncan off even more.
Rodney, Dawn, Samey, and Bridgette all caught their marshmallows happily while Amy ate her's with a devilish grin on her face. Duncan munched on his with a glare at the host, while Scott and Courtney ate theirs in peace.
"The next two marshmallows go to Eva and Katie." Chris said. Katie caught her's and looked over at Sadie worriedly. She had voted for her friend, but had instantly regretted doing it afterward. Sadie gasped, as did Harold.
"And we're down to our final two contestants, with only one marshmallow." Chris said. "Who's it gonna be?" He paused and held up the marshmallow. "The last marshmallow goes to..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"Harold." Chris finished, flicking the marshmallow to the lanky nerd. "Sorry Sadie, but you're out."
Sadie frowned and looked at her teammates. She then couldn't hold back her tears any longer. "Katie I'm sorry! I'm sorry for throwing a tennis ball at you, and I'm sorry for yelling at you, and...and...I'm sorry for voting for you!" She bawled.
"I'm sorry for voting for you too!" Katie cried. "And now you're out! Amy convinced me to vote you off since you were being mean, but after I voted for you, I instantly regretted it!" She told her.
"Amy? I thought we were friends!" Sadie said, tears still streaming from her eyes. "I knew I was on to you!"
"Oops, look at the time, time for you to go Sadie!" Chris said as Chef suddenly appeared to haul her away. He unfortunately did not have time to change and was still in his Cupid outfit. Despite the tearful farewell, nobody could help laughing at the cook.
"Any last words, Sadie?" Chris asked the larger BFFFL. He held the remote control manning the boot of Shame, ready to press the button at any moment.
"Katie, I forgive you for voting for me! You can win this! Win it for both of us!" Sadie said. "I believe in you!"
"Have fun at the Playa!" Katie said, tearfully waving Sadie away form the side.
"I'll miss you!" Katie said running up to hug Sadie. Chris was about to press the button, but since Katie was in the way, he couldn't, much to his annoyance.
"Don't worry, we're more prepared this time since we went through the same thing last time." Sadie said. "Alright, I'm ready." She sniffed. Katie stepped back from the Boot of Shame and Chris pressed the button.
The large army boot swung down, hitting Sadie in the back and sending her flying off the island shouting, "KAAAATIIIIEEEE!" Once the BFFFL was gone, Katie sighed and trudged back to her cabin sadly. Luckily, Bridgette was waiting by the bonfire pit to console her.
"How will Katie survive without her best friend? Is Courtney jealous of Duncan's new ride? And what is Amy up to? The answers to all these questions and more, next time, on Total...Drama...Unfinished Business!" Chris said as the camera faded to black.
(Voting Confessionals)
Amy- "Sadie's getting too suspicious of me, so it's time to lose her. To be honest, losing one moron isn't that bad, I've already got Courtney on my side and Duncan and Scott to follow." She grinned. "At least it was the fat one, the skinny one is much prettier in my opinion, but none compare to me, of course." She said with a hair-flip.
Katie- "Sadie was, like, so mean to me today, so I vote for Sadie!" She said. She paused and then burst into tears. "Oh, I really hope you don't get voted off! I'm sorry Sadie!" She cried.
Sadie- "Katie was super mean to me, and I have no idea why! I think Amy might have something to do with it, but Katie was a jerk, so I'm voting for her." She huffed.
Courtney- "Apparently Sadie is just starting to realize that Amy is rude, so we're voting for her. I've talked to Duncan and Scott and convinced them to vote off Sadie instead of each other, so I vote for Sadie." She said.
Duncan- "While I really want to vote off Scott for destroying Vanessa, Courtney says Sadie's gotta go, so why not." He shrugged.
Scott- "I can't believe Duncan knocked me out for half of the race! He's just lucky Courtney's super persuasive, or I'd be voting his butt out of here!" He said, jabbing a thumb behind him.
Bridgette- "Most of my team is voting Harold because he made a really bad car, but I'm going to vote for Eva instead. She wasn't very nice today, and technically she destroyed some of the car."
Dawn- "I will vote for Harold, although I do not foresee him being eliminated. So yes, this is technically a throw-away vote." She said as she meditated in lotus position.
Harold- "Eva has no patience! Gosh! I'm voting for her." he shook his head.
Samey- "I guess I'm gonna, like, vote for Harold because he didn't really make a good car. I don't know." She shrugged.
Rodney- "Harold." The farm boy said.
Eva- "I'm voting for Harold. That moron doesn't know how to build a car worth crap! That piece of junk ruined our chances at winning." She snapped.
Votes:
Amy- Sadie
Katie- Sadie
Sadie- Katie
Duncan- Sadie
Courtney- Sadie
Scott- Sadie
Bridgette- Eva
Dawn- Harold
Harold- Eva
Samey- Harold
Rodney- Harold
Eva- Harold
– –
Sadie- 5
Harold- 4
Eva- 2
Katie- 1
– –
Voted Off- Topher, DJ, Ella, Alejandro, Anne Maria, Ezekiel, Dakota, Jo, Sadie
Reason: Once again, sorry that this took so long to update, I promise the next one will hopefully be out on time! Anyway, I decided to eliminate Sadie because this is a sort of turning point in the contest that you'll see later. Also, Sadie was never a serious character. She was always meant to be a throwaway character, but I'm glad I've actually given her and Katie a plot, and I think I did good with her character. :)
[1]- It is literally impossible not to read this in a French Narrator voice if you've seen this episode of Spongebob! XD
[2]- Geoff is referencing Jurassic Park, which takes place off the coast of Costa Rica. If you have not seen Jurassic Park or the latest film Jurassic World, I highly suggest doing so. The second movie is okay, but avoid the third one at all costs!
[3]- You asked for more Gravity Falls references, so here's one straight from The Bottomless Pit and the short called Truth Ache. If you recall, Stan wanted to teach a bear to drive...
[4]- The whole potato chip incident is a reference to one of my favorite Garfield strips in which John gets a paper cut on his tongue, so Garfield offers him a Potato Chip. John, being an idiot, takes the potato chip and eats it, only to feel lots and lots of pain on his tongue.
~There were many other references throughout this chapter, including scenes, and maybe event he entire episode itself, see if you can figure them out in the reviews! ;) ~
~Also, before I forget, I'll be working on a short, 3-chapter story called A Chris-Mas Carol. It won't be out until December, but keep an eye out for it! ;) ~
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Next: Mutated Survival Hoopla (November 22, Hopefully Sooner!)