Total Drama: Unfinished Business

by Stereotypical Vampire

After Pahkitew Island, Chris has decided to reuse Camp Pahkitew for a sort of 'New All-Star' season. That's right, he's bringing back 36 contestants that still have beef with the show or have had a lack of screen time, and pitting them against each other for the Grand prize of 1 MILLION!

26. League of Losers, Part 1

Disclaimer- I do not own any of the Total Drama characters that I choose to torture—I mean put in the story! They are merely here for mine, and your amusement. No profit is being made off of this (No one would would stoop as low as to pay me for this anyway) I give all credit to the creators of Total Drama, as well as Johnny Depp, because...well, he's Johnny Depp!

Notes From The Depths of Vampirism- Hey, three months is better than four, right? Oh who am I kidding it's leaning on four. Once again, sorry for the long wait. Also, y'all don't need to PM me and review saying that it's been a while. I'm quite aware. That being said, I hope you guys enjoy this episode because a lot of stuff is about to go down, just you wait!

Also, if anyone has any good Total Drama fan fictions to recommend I'd be happy to hear! I've been looking for a good one to read and just haven't found much. I'm more specifically looking for competition fics like this one, but anything else is fine too.

Also don't forget to check out my DeviantArt! There'll be drawings, chapter sneak peaks, status updates, journals and more! I've said it a hundred times but I'll do it again just for you in the corner who's not paying attention. Yes you, don't think I didn't notice that you skipped over my Authors Note again! My DeviantArt is StereotypicalVampire. I'd put a link but fanfiction seems to be finicky with those.

TheBlueAzuru: I know right, it's a miracle! Don't worry though, as you can see we've returned to our regularly not-scheduled programming. I do agree the chapter was a little bit filler but I'm hoping this one more than makes up for it! I'm glad you liked the Rick and Morty reference too, a lot of people seem to as well so I guess I'll have to include more! Also, good eye ;)

DSX62415: Oh my glob, you mixed two references together. You are the true enlightened intellectual.

Knifez: I definitely get what you're saying but I do have an argument to make. For one, the whole team didn't vote him off, and two it was a strategic move on Courtney and Sky's part. At this point it's a game of the guys versus the girls and the girls needed Harold gone, regardless of his performance in the challenge. Not to mention while he may have been very skilled in the challenge, the likelihood that they would need him again going further is somewhat unlikely. I know this probably doesn't change your opinion and I'm fine with that, just thought I'd give you a little reasoning. Hopefully this next set of episodes will be better.

CMC: I'm glad you liked the different references and also happy late birthday! Although while on the subject, I ask that you not spam the reviews reminding me about your challenge ideas or countdowns to your birthday. It's perfectly fine to let me know, but I'm not a very forgetful person, I'm aware of your challenge ideas. As I have said before, I will be using one of them much later in the season. Anyway, hope you like the chapter!

Nicky Haugh: Darn, guess I was wrong! But thanks anyway! :)

Lone Wolf: Yes, Amy is indeed proving to be quite the b****. I'm glad you hate her, that's the goal :)

FireFlamerx9z: You know what, at this point I'm not even sure. I'm about 90% sure she's on some kind of drugs, but I don't think we'll ever find out...

OmegaLeonidas: So the crazy rant that Izzy went on is a reference to the Adult Swim show "Rick and Morty". It doesn't really have any implications on the story, it's more of a funny and crazy reference that I threw in there. At this point, I'd just take anything Izzy says with a grain of salt. Well, maybe not everything, sometimes she's got a little sanity in there.

Joel Connell: Thanks for letting me know that I missed Gwen! Wouldn't want to leave her out! Izzy is definitely the only person who I could get away with doing the Mulan McNugget sauce rant, and when you said she has really left the crazy train, I instantly started singing the song. Now it won't be out of my head for months! Oh well, maybe that's not such a bad thing. I agree that Sammy wearing Cody's clothes would be weird (I personally hate it when girls where their boyfriend's clothes at my school, it's just straight up creepy in my opinion). I don't think I'm going to have her change clothes just to make things easier on me and my bad memory, but who knows, maybe I'll change my mind later! Also, thanks for mentioning the story! I'm not sure I'll be able to get the second half of this out by your birthday, but think of this as an early gift! :)

TimeLord27: Wow thanks, that really means a lot to me! I'm not sure if you were up to date on chapters when writing this review but Cody and Samey have officially become a couple in the story as of only a few episodes ago. Also, the guy's alliance is definitely bursting at the seams. Since Cody, Noah and Owen were all placed on the other team, their ties with the guy's alliance have essentially been severed until the merge, should the alliance last that long. So at this point, Team Kihew controls the guy's alliance.

SilentSinger948: It's best not to question cartoon logic, it just gets confusing after a while. And yes, everyone is sick of dealing with Dave and Sky's bickering and they're about to do something about it . . .

Great Idea Alert: The Mulan McNugget Sauce reference was definitely a great idea, and a lot of people seem to think so too! Also, we actually do have a TV Tropes page! There's not a whole lot to it yet and I don't really know how to use the sight, but if you or any one else does, feel free to edit it!

Argonian Dovahkiin: Well, the story isn't necessarily intended to ship them, and while I do prefer Nemma, I think Scarlett and Noah would definitely be an interesting couple! I do think they'd be quite the arguing one though similar to Alejandro and Heather, mostly because of Noah's sarcastic attitude and Scarlett's calculated composure. Also, feel free to use the squidward on a chair thing, it's not even my joke! It's actually from a vine or a YouTube video. Just search it up and you'll likely find it.

The Nerdinator: Darn it, I thought I had it right! I wouldn't call myself a science buff but I too enjoy me a little science. Guess I didn't quite remember that one correctly but props to you for pointing out the inaccuracy!

OmegaLeonidas: Well, I don't have an exact date but if you haven't seen it yet, they've announced the new season as "Total Drama Daycare". I kid you not. I'm not completely on board with it but I'm willing to give it a shot. I do hope they return to the usual set up though and give us a second season of Ridonculous Race while they're at it.

TheBlackDarkShadow: Thanks! Yeah I'm a little sad Harold had to go but that's just how this game works (and subsequently is what makes it so enticing!).

Eric Cartman: Sorry for keeping you on edge! I'm glad you're so hooked on this story! About the Codammy interaction, I know that's a main factor to this story, but I don't want it to be the leading on by any means. Some episodes will have more interaction, others won't. I'm just trying to balance it for those who don't care as much about Codammy (Which actually doesn't seem to be very many people!). Also, here's a little special information for you, hopefully to keep your balls from exploding. The Cruise of Lose II will actually be the next episode following this fantasy VR, so get PUMPED!

KinkyGreenBean: "Nerf Jasmine" XD what is this, a video game? But in all serious I definitely see what you're getting at and I've been trying! It's a little difficult since the show basically made her to be that unstoppable force, but I'm working on it.

Mpatton17: Patience, young grasshopper.

Joelbissaintthe: Yeah, I'm also not a very big fan of Dave in the show. Some people think Sky is more at fault and while I do see that, I think Dave is more at fault, he just did so many things wrong and we kind of asking for it. That being said, I'm trying not to be bias when writing the argument so I guess we'll see how that pans out.

Reflective599: I'm glad you like the Cody and Samey shipping and I'm also glad you hate Amy with passion, that's my intent haha. Also, I don't even quite remember where I got all the names of Noah's brothers from, but I believe it was actually a reference to this kid at my school who has 12 brothers and they're all named after people from the Christian Bible or something. I don't know if Tobias is from the bible and if not then it might just have been random.

…

Boy that was a lot of reviews! Once again thank you for putting up with my crazy update schedule and I'm so happy many of you become so attached to this story! Also, let me know your thoughts on the upcoming "Total Drama Daycare" series in the reviews! While I'd certainly prefer a season 2 of Ridonculous Race or another regular season of Total Drama, I'm willing to give this show a shot. And hey, Jude from 6teen is here for some reason so maybe it'll be good! (That's me trying to look on the bright side and hoping this isn't a repeat of Teen Titans Go!)

---

Episode 22, Part 1 – League of Losers

"Last time on Total Drama Unfinished Business!" Chris began the recap on a clip of the hockey rink rising out of the island's mainframe. "Our campers took to our nation's great sport of Hockey!"

"Some were all stars," Harold was shown spinning around several times before stopping and shooting the puck into the goal, "While others were big time losers!" A clip of Samey getting nailed with a snowball played.

"Jasmine and Eva worked out their differences on Exile and became a near unstoppable duo!" The two girls were seen passing the puck to each other before Eva scored the goal. "And Harold almost stopped them but thanks to Amy's sneaky work behind the scenes, he failed." Chris chuckled as the nerd's skates were shown falling apart.

"Team Sisikwew won and it seemed Sky was doomed but thanks to some quick thinking by her and Courtney, Harold was sent home." Chris finished. "We've got 19 dorks left and it's soon to become one less, so hear ye, hear ye, for I decree that this is Total...Drama...Unfinished Business-eth!" He said with a medieval accent.

xxx

Dear mom and dad I'm doin' fine;

You guys are on my mind!

You asked me what I wanted to be,

And now I think the answer is plain to see!

I wanna be...famous!

I wanna live close to the sun!

Well pack your bags 'cause I've already won!

Everything to prove nothin' in my way;

I'll get there one day!

'Cause I wanna be famous!

(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa!)

I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous!

I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous!

(Whistling)

xxx

(Outhouse Confessional – Isn't it catchy?)

Dave- "You've gotta be kidding me!" He exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "Duncan said we would be voting off Sky, but then he went and voted for one of our alliance members! I thought these people were gonna be my ticket to getting rid of Sky but it seems I'm gonna have to find another way!" He grumbled.

Sky- "I can't believe last night actually worked!" She said with wide eyes. "Courtney really came through! Although I keep getting less-than-inviting looks from some of the guys..."

---

"Okay so I bet you're all wondering what happened last night." Duncan sighed as he confronted the guys in the cabin. Scott had already gone to the Mess Hall for breakfast so it was just the alliance members.

"Yeah, some answers would be nice." Dave glared at the punk, tapping the ground with his foot impatiently.

"Let me start off by saying Harold was expendable. We didn't need him and we'll continue to do fine without him. That's why he joined the alliance." Duncan explained.

"So what about me? Am I expendable too?" Trent raised an eyebrow. "Me and Harold were initiated at the same time."

"Yeah! Me too!" Dave added.

"Whoa...what happened to you?" Duncan wondered. Trent's hair was a mess, his eyes were bloodshot and he had sagging bags underneath them.

"...nothing." Trent waved it off. "Just...rough night's sleep."

(Outhouse Confessional – Or could it be something else?)

Trent- "Dave was up all night ranting about Sky!" He shouted, clearly not as fine as he claimed to be. "All the other guys somehow fell asleep but of course Dave sleeps right above me." He sighed, practically tearing out his hair. "This has to stop..."

---

"No one else is expendable, don't worry. The difference between you guys and Harold is that I actually like you." Duncan assured them.

"But why did you vote him off?" Geoff asked.

"Well uh . . . Courtney convinced me-"

"So it was Courtney!" Dave exclaimed.

"So what?" Duncan rolled his eyes. "She has no control over me, her plan just made sense."

The guys still didn't look so sure.

"Okay, look. Maybe Harold's elimination was a mistake, maybe it wasn't, but all I can say is that it happened and nothing is happening to the rest of you."

"But there are four girls left and four of us, how will we get the numbers?" Trent pointed out.

"Well, as much as it pains me to say this, we need to get Scott on board with our plan." Duncan sighed. "I guess that's the price I get for going behind your backs. We even?"

"Well, I guess you wouldn't recruit Scott unless you were really sticking with us." Trent reasoned. Geoff nodded in agreement.

"Alright, he'll never join if I'm the one to tell him so I'm gonna need one of you to do it. I nominate Geoff since he's the most persuasive guy I know." Duncan said.

"He's right, I can be pretty persuasive." Geoff grinned. He then leaned over to Dave and whispered, "What does persuasive mean again?"

"With Scott, we'll have the numbers advantage over them. Now that Harold's gone, we can get rid of Leshawna without worry." Duncan told them.

"Oh, you're right. Good point." Trent nodded, now understanding Duncan's motives.

"But we're going to vote out Sky first, right?" Dave inquired, staring intensely at Duncan.

"Of course, of course," Duncan nodded, "I'm just saying we won't have any issues on deciding who to vote off after Sky's gone."

"Good." Dave nodded, satisfied with the punk's answer.

---

"So Scott," Geoff said, walking up to the dirt farmer who was casually whittling away at a piece of wood on the steps to the cabin. "Me and the other guys were wondering if you'd be interested in an alliance." The teen leaned against the porch railing and not a moment too soon it gave way and the party animal toppled over.

Geoff quickly stood up and brushed himself off. "So what do you say?"

"Who's in it?" Scott raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

"Well like I said it's all the guys." Geoff explained.

"So Duncan's in it?"

"Uh, yeah?" Geoff winced.

"Nope. No deal." Scott shook his head, standing up to leave Geoff and the conversation.

"Come on dude! Just 'cause Duncan's in it doesn't mean you can't join. Can't you two just settle your differences for a few votes?" Geoff asked him. "Besides bro, without an alliance you'll be toast."

"Is that a threat?" Scott narrowed his eyes at the surfer.

"What? No!" Geoff said defensively. "I'm just saying the girls might target you because you have no alliance."

Scott pondered this for a moment. "You make a good point." He nodded. "I guess I'm in. But if I catch wind of any double-crossing..." He gave him a warning glare.

"Don't worry dude, no double-crossing here!" Geoff assured him.

(Outhouse Confessional – Not shady at all)

Scott- "He's awful persuasive, I'll give him that." He admitted.

Geoff- "And I still don't know what that word means!" He whooped.

---

Trent yawned as he grabbed a tray and got in line for breakfast. Despite the loud chatter of the Mess Hall, it was bliss to him for one reason: Dave was nowhere to be found.

The Germophobe usually skipped breakfast, deeming it too filthy. Truth be told, he wasn't quite exaggerating. Chef dumped some white slop on Trent's tray and the musician swore he saw something skittering around the mush.

Trent sighed and turned around and found a table. He sat across from Courtney who also appeared to be running on a lack of sleep. "Dave keep you up all night?" Courtney asked. Her hair was frazzled and like Trent, she had heavy bags under her eyes.

Trent nodded. "Sky?" He raised an eyebrow. Courtney also nodded in return.

"This has to stop..." Courtney groaned.

Jasmine then walked over and saw the two tired teens. "I reckon it wasn't just the birds that kept you two up all night?" She wondered.

"Sky and Dave are driving us crazy!" Courtney clenched her fists, being careful not to talk too loud in case Sky was nearby.

"Neither one of them will admit their faults." Trent added.

"And they apparently don't need sleep because they were up for hours venting to us." Courtney threw her hands in the air.

Jasmine nodded. "I agree this has gone on long enough. It's about time those two finally made up with each other."

"But how?" Trent wondered.

"They'll never listen to each other." Courtney pointed out.

"Then we'll have to make them listen to each other." Jasmine grinned, an idea popping into her head. "This ends today!"

---

"Hey! What are you doing?!" Dave cried as Trent grabbed him by the waist and hauled him over his shoulders. The sleep-deprived musician carried him out of their cabin with relative ease, despite Dave's struggling. The Germophobe was quite scrawny and hardly weighed anything at all.

xxx

Paralleling Dave's kidnapping, Courtney dragged Sky out of their side of the cabin. Sky was light but she also put up more of a fight. However, Courtney had her right where she wanted her and continued to drag the small gymnast behind her.

"Let go of me!" Sky exclaimed. Not only was she confused about what was going on but she was also quite shocked that her new alliance partner was dragging her through the dirt by force.

Courtney finally arrived at the Outhouse where Jasmine was waiting. At about the same time, Trent arrived with Dave.

Jasmine yanked open the door and simultaneously, Courtney and Trent both tossed the bickering couple into the confessional. Before either could make an escape, Jasmine slammed the door shut, locked the door with a stick, and placed a large boulder in front of it.

"Let us out!" Dave cried from inside the stink chamber.

"What is this?" Sky banged on the wooden door but to no avail.

"You two are gonna learn to get along whether you like it or not!" Jasmine hollered at them.

"We've had enough of your constant complaining!" Courtney chimed in.

"IT'S TIME TO STOP!" Trent screamed, holding up a clock, looking like quite the crazy person with his tired physique.

Jasmine and Courtney both raised their eyebrows at him but decided not to question it.

"I'm pretty sure this is illegal somehow!" Dave shouted.

"Not on this island it's not!" Courtney returned. With that, the three of them walked away, leaving Sky and Dave trapped inside the smelly outhouse.

(Outhouse Confessional – VIVA LA REVOLUCION!)

Dave- "This is all your fault." He huffed.

Sky- "Um, my fault? Don't even get me started!" She glared at him with her arms crossed.

Dave- "Go ahead, we've got all day!" Dave shouted in frustration before trying the door again. Of course, it didn't open. "Ugh! I've gotta get out of here!" He cried. "Can't you break the walls or something?"

Sky- "I may be an athletic gymnast but I'm no weight-lifter." She shook her head. "We're in here until you and I settle this."

Dave- "I guess we're gonna be here a while, then!" He snapped, sitting down on the floor for a second before he felt a mysterious substance and quickly bolted upright with a yelp.

---

The other contestants gathered around the Virtual Reality machine, ready for Chris to give them their challenge. "For today's challenge, we'll be delving into the fantastic world of magic and fantasy!" The host declared.

For once, Noah's interest had been peaked. "Now you're talking my language." said the nerd. Of course he preferred reading literature but he was no stranger to gaming.

"Your goal is to destroy the other team's crystally magic thingy." Chris told them. "But in order to do that, you'll have to make your way up one of three different lanes or traverse the dangerous jungles all while avoiding monsters and encountering enemy forces."

"That kind of sounds a lot like-"

"Don't you finish that sentence!" Chris shushed him.

"Lemme guess, didn't get the rights?" Noah smirked.

"Ugh, companies are so stingy with their copyright these days." He muttered.

"I have but one question for thee," Izzy spoke up, donning a medieval accent, "Will we be garnishing the appropriate attire?"

"If you mean will you be dressing up, yes." Chris nodded. "You'll each be given different powers and abilities to help you fight your way to victory." He noted. "And no, you do not get to choose. They will be determined based on your personality and physical traits."

"Ooh, cool!" Izzy grinned.

"Dang, sounds like Harold would have loved this challenge." Trent lamented.

"Yeah, and I bet he would've been pretty good at it too." Leshawna narrowed her eyes. She may have been fooled but she was no dummy. She knew how things went down the night before.

"Well interesting that you mention that," Chris grinned. "Wait a second, where's Dave and Sky?" He wondered, suddenly realizing he was missing two contestants.

"We got sick of them complaining about each other so we locked them in the confessional until they made up." Jasmine explained.

"Good enough for me." Chris shrugged. "Unfortunately that puts Team Kihew at a three person disadvantage."

"Maybe we should have locked them in after the challenge." Courtney whispered to Trent.

"Luckily for you guys, we just happen to have three substitutes right here!" Chris said as Chef rolled in on a jeep. In the back seat was none other than Harold along with Leonard and Lindsay.

Duncan's face went white when he saw the nerd who shot a glare in his direction.

"I was gonna have them hinder you guys during the challenge but why not make it a fair fight." Chris shrugged.

"Yaaay! I'm so excited to see Tyler again! Where are you Ty?" Lindsay smiled, looking through the crowd of contestants for her boyfriend.

"Um, dude, Tyler was voted out like a while ago." Geoff reminded her.

"Oh yeah..." Lindsay recalled. "Can I be the princess?" She suddenly switched gears, forgetting all about her boyfriend again.

Duncan facepalmed. "Great..."

"Alright! Get into your seats and let the battle begin!" Chris announced. The contestants did so and with a flick of the lever, they were transported into the mystical realm of Chris-Terra.

---

With a blast of blue light, Team Kihew spawned in ten small explosions of arcane energy at their team's base. The garrison was a platform composed of ancient, worn cobblestones with an enormous, gleaming azure gem embedded in its center surrounded by rings of glowing runes. Down a short flight shallow steps was a gigantic construct composed mostly of the biggest, glowing crystal any of them had ever seen – arguably the only glowing crystal they had ever seen. Standing like silent sentinels over the structure were a pair of turrets carved like enormous warriors wielding even bigger hammers. Beyond that, the base sprawled out in a large half circle that divided up into three lanes at the head of which stood three more towers.

Off to the side was a large beast of unknown origin that looked vaguely like an overweight bison crossed with that of a woolly mammoth and an elk. What looked to be a small shop of sorts was set up at the sleeping creature's side, with various artifacts and wares strewn almost carelessly about. At the head of the shop was none other than-

"Is that a hot elf?" Bridgette cocked an eyebrow.

From simultaneously nowhere and everywhere, Chris' jeering voice rang out in a mocking tone. "Yes, yes it is. Handsome devil, ain't he? Kinda reminds me of myself, now that I-"

"Is there a point to this?" Leshawna cut him off with a perturbed pout.

"Oh, yeah! You can buy items from him to get stronger. As the game goes along you'll passively gain gold, as well as a small bonus for making your enemies run for the hills."

"Then just what am I supposed to do with this big ol' thing?" The Sister with 'Tude referred to a huge lump of hulking bronze carved into the likeness of an open maw, where a mysterious sea green energy hunkered away inside; the idol wasn't the only thing that was new, however. Leshawna herself was now clad in a heavyset, sea-foam green chest plate with maroon accents to match her now powerful physique – she looked like she could snap logs like twigs with her robust arms. A pair of bronze gauntlets to match her intimidating presence clung tightly to her forearms with a pair of enormous leather boots to match. Everything about Leshawna was bigger and louder than before, everything from the way her eyes glowed an aggressive green to the pulsating tentacle tattoos that slithered across her body and even her . . . assets.

"That's your weapon." Harold explained. "You can use it to beat the snot out of people. That, or the tentacles that you passively spawn. Might I suggest Duncan?"

"Did you jus' say tentacles?"

"Yeah."

"I thought this show was s'ppose to be rated PG!"

"Don't blame me. I didn't make the game!"

"So you're tellin' me they ain't gonna die from one hit with this thing?" she effortlessly hauled the gigantic idol onto her shoulder; it must have weighed a ton alone.

"Logic and physics are quite different in video games." Harold clarified. "That, and everyone here is significantly more durable than the average person."

"No kiddin'. You look like you could stop a truck with those guns, sugar baby!" Leshawna playfully teased the nerd once she took note of his new form.

To say the Dweeb had been completely transformed would have been an understatement. While he still retained is ginger hair and stubble, his once wiry frame had practically quadrupled tenfold, granting him powerful, rippling muscles that looked strong to crush solid rock. His hands were absolutely tremendous pulsing veins connected to each meaty finger and his legs were powerful and robust. He wore a heavy suit of glistening steel armor with a cape tainted the color of blood hanging from his back. A pair of enormous shoulder pads cupped his shoulders and framed his comparatively small head in flames – that is to say, they were on fire. Gripped tightly in his hand was a gigantic battle axe easily taller and undoubtedly heavier than him. And yes, for those that were wondering, it was also on fire for some strange reason that no-one really questioned.

Harold experimentally flexed his new vigorous form and smiled. "Wicked!"

(Chris-Terra Confessional – Now with marble toilet seats!)

Leshawna- "Not gonna lie, seein' Harold all decked out in that suit of armor had me under some kind of spell!" she admitted with a dreamy look in her eye, fanning herself.

---

"Yaay! I'm a unicorn!" Lindsay squealed with glee, hopping up and down happily.

The Dumb Princess was almost unrecognizable, save for her facile features. Her skin had turned a soft lavender in color with deep, indigo swirls traversing across her rounded shoulders and back. Her legs had taken on a more equine appearance, including a pair of cloven hooves that held her with a dainty and elegant disposition. Lindsay's ears now resembled those of a horse and her once golden locks had faded to a deep, tranquil turquoise that glittered every now and again in the right light; from her forehead sprouted a single horn and from the base of her spine grew a long tail tipped with a tuft of silken hair. Her outfit consisted of little more than a dark blue and purple robe with golden highlights that cut off at her thighs, leaving her long legs exposed. Her weapon of choice – if it could even be called that – was a tall staff whose tip was shaped like a large crescent moon from which hung a small lantern imbued with a strange kind of golden magic not unlike that of starlight or fireflies.

Naturally though, most of the boys' attention was focused on her most prominent feature, which hadn't diminished in the slightest. If anything, they had gotten even bigger, if that was even possible.

"Umm . . . th-that's cool, Lindsay." Geoff swallowed nervously, trying desperately to keep his composure.

"Aw, and Bridgette's a mermaid! That's so cute!" the dumb blonde cooed, completely oblivious to all the attention she was drawing to herself. "I wanna be a mermaid, too! Can I be a unicorn-mermaid? Is that even allowed?"

"I don't think it works like that." the Surfer Girl found herself mesmerized by her new form. Her once blonde locks had morphed into long, gossamer, pink fins that draped over her shoulders like hair and her skin had taken upon an overall darker magenta tone. Where her legs and abdomen had once been was now a long, fish-like tail tipped with shimmering rosette and violet flukes and pectoral fins at the waist; thousands of glittering, rainbow-colored scales covered her forearms and tail, flawlessly melting into her skin. What little attire she wore consisted mostly of a bronze plating that hugged her backside, a chest plate that hugged her torso snugly, and a helmet that vaguely resembled a trident with a blue gem embedded in the visor. In addition, she had been given a staff about the length of her body tipped with a lotus flower-like ornament as a weapon of sorts.

Geoff was speechless. "Wow, Bridge . . . you look beautiful . . ."

"Aw, thanks. You aren't half-bad yourself." the Surfer Girl blushed as she eyed her boyfriend.

The grom was mostly human, being bare-chested and clothed solely in a pair of baggy, green pants with a thick belt, save for a few unusual details. For one, his ears were long and pointed, baring a striking resemblance to that of a wolf, and his ever present grin had been replaced with a charismatic smile full of razor-sharp fangs. From his shoulders sprouted a cape of fluorescent feathers colored a dazzling display of striking yellows and fiery reds with a lovely splash of orange, blue, and green for detail. Geoff's blonde hair had been replaced with hundreds of black and white striped quills not unlike that of a porcupine; more quills sprouted from his elbows, in between the feathers on his shoulders, and from the tip of a long, red tail that grew from the base of his spine beneath his feathered cloak.

"Check it out, dudes! Now I'm a real party animal!" he crowed, striking a theatrical pose that made his feathers glisten like gold in the sun.

"Nice moves, Pretty Boy." Duncan scoffed, his voice several octaves lower while it echoed. That was probably because his entire head was encased in an iron helmet tipped with three metal spikes; only the twin pits of emerald fire that were his eyes were visible. The rest of the punk's body was cocooned in a gigantic set of hulking, steel armor with broad shoulder pads, tremendous gauntlets, and spikes studding just about every conceivable surface. A cape black as night clung to his back and in his hand he held a morning star of epic proportions; it looked like it could have reduced mountains to rubble or obliterate an entire army in a single swing.

"You're one to talk." Courtney scolded, narrowing her eyes at him in an accusing manner.

The 'Type A' was relatively unchanged for the most part, save for a few details. Her once chocolate hair was now a bright maroon and hung messy and unkempt over her face and shoulders, nearly obscuring a vertical scar that ran over her left eye. She was clothed in a tight brown top that cupped her breasts perhaps a little too loosely and a black leather jacket that left her midriff open. Courtney wore a pair of tight, black leather pants with multiple straps and a belt filled to the brim with knives and blades; in her hands she carried a pair of razor-sharp daggers whose glistening edges were stained with a mysterious, dried, red substance.

"Hello, gorgeous." Scott playfully wiggled his brow at her.

"Bite me." Courtney growled.

"Don't give 'im any ideas, princess." Duncan narrowed his smoldering eyes. He casually let the blunt end of his mace fall to the ground, striking and easily cracking the well worn stone with a resounding boom! "The vermin'll gnaw on just about anything."

"I am not a rat!" Scott shouted.

"Pfft. Yeah, right. You look in the mirror recently?"

The dirt farmer shot the tremendous suit of armor a glare and looked down at the reflective surface of the gem embedded in the middle of their base – and instantly regretted it.

His ears were furry and pointed like an animal's and virtually every part of his face was covered in a short layer of fuzz that tapered into a long, curly beard at his chin. One of his eyes was a milky white crossed with a faded, vertical scar and the other was wild and orange with rage. His deformed posture forced him to hunch over, making him look smaller than he initially appeared, especially when compared to his rather eccentric outfit. He wore a pair of tattered, green shorts held up by a pair of suspender-like, leather straps that held an entire artillery's worth of bombs and explosives, most of which had crudely drawn smiles and grins painted upon them. A scruffy tail poked out from a slit in the dirt farmer's pants and his right leg had been replaced by a cheaply made peg leg cobbled together from bits and pieces; most of his fur was heavily singed and a few strands still burned with a few stubborn flames.

"AAAAAAAHHH! What happened to me!?" Scott pulled at his hair. "I'm hideous!"

Courtney gave him a smug smile. "I wouldn't say that. I think it suits you rather well."

Duncan's laughter bellowed in the depths of his iron helm. "AHAHAHAHAHAA! Want me to go get the mousetraps, Rat Boy? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, this is rich! AHAHAHAHA!"

"I'm not a rat!"

"Hey!" Trent suddenly shouted. "Come on, guys, we're suppose to be a team!"

The musician hadn't changed much, with the exception of his now long, flowing, ebony hair and piercing, jade eyes. He was dressed in a deerskin tunic with arm guards wrapped in bandages and deep, indigo tribal markings upon his face and shoulders. He wore a pair of green trousers with patches in the knees, a pair of leather boots, a pair of gold rings on his fingers, and a green cloak with gold trimmings and a hood that obscured most of his facial features. A quiver full of arrows tightly hugged his back and in his hands he carried a bow carved from he bone of a large beast engraved with blue runes and arcane symbols.

"No way, Robin Hood! This is hilarious!" Duncan continued to guffaw uncontrollably. "Hang on, hang on, lemme go get some cheese for our vermin problem!"

"I! AM! NOT! A! RAT!" Scott practically shrieked.

"Ugh, you two are so immature." Courtney rolled her eyes.

The dirt farmer scowled. "He started it!" he pointed an accusing finger at Duncan.

"Hey, I can't help it if the game has a sense of humor." the punk grinned.

Harold coughed awkwardly. "Actually, our various characters were chosen at random. The possibility that we each ended up with a role or character that matched our supposed play styles and personalities-"

"Can it, Doris!"

"You promised you'd never speak of that again!" the geek protested.

"This is getting out of hand." Bridgette sighed.

Naturally, Lindsay was confused. "Whose hand? What got out? Is it dangerous!?" she gaped with fear.

"Come on, dudes lets work this out!" Geoff attempted to calm the situation.

"Never! Not until he apologizes!" Scott spat at Duncan's face.

"I concur. I won't stand for this kind of mistreatment any longer!"

"Hah! As they say in Russia, fat chance, Igor!"

"Why you-"

"SILENCE!" Leonard unexpectedly bellowed at the top of his lungs, flinging his arms out before him. A sudden gust of wind kicked up as he did so, threatening to blast everyone back with the sheer amount of power he effortlessly wielded. "BEHOLD! I have reached my final form and achieved my full power!"

For the most part, the LARPer was unchanged, other the fact that he looked real. As in, he looked like an actual wizard and not a loser who had trouble telling the difference between the realms of fantasy and reality. The fake beard that once hung loosely from his face now not only was attached to his chin, but easily reached his feet with its absurd length. His robes were heavier, held up by a belt with various pouches and trinkets hanging from his waist, and had wider sleeves with runic symbols snaking their way up his arms. His cowl covered his face in shadow, leaving only his eyes visible when they radiated lightning and power with the greatest of ease. The LARPer raised a staff tipped with a glass orb filled with pulsating, arcane energy and shouted towards the heavens, summoning a thunderstorm as he did so.

"Dude . . . nice entrance!" Geoff was the first to speak after a lengthy silence.

"Thank you, man of beasts." Leonard gave a slightly smug smile. "Let us dispense with the formalities and put aside our differences so that we may achieve victory!"

"I'm down." Bridgette agreed.

"What's down?" Lindsay wondered.

"I'll explain later," Trent promised her. "For now, lets just get going."

"You'd better cooperate." Duncan hissed at Harold.

"Fear not, teammate. In spite of your betrayal, I shall fight alongside you with honor and glory!" Harold declared. "Mostly because this is the coolest experience ever!" He added with excitement. The nerd felt his muscles once more, earning an eye roll from Leshawna.

---

With a blast of red light, Team Sisikwew spawned in ten small explosions of arcane energy at their team's base. The garrison was a platform composed of ancient, worn cobblestones with an enormous, gleaming cerise gem embedded in its center surrounded by rings of glowing runes. Down a short flight shallow steps was a gigantic construct composed mostly of the biggest, glowing crystal any of them had- you know what? Let's just say for all intents and purposes it was exactly like the other team's base but everything was red, alright?

"Izzy loves the author's choice of words and these rad new duds!" the Psycho Hose Beast excitedly exclaimed upon catching sight of her new appearance.

The redhead's once ginger hair now flashed a kaleidoscope of colors every few seconds, ranging from soft pinks and lavenders to virtually every other color of the cosmic spectrum; stars and galaxies danced between individual locks of her constantly changing hair. She wore a large, blue scarf and a tattered top that cut off just below her breasts. A belt full of various trinkets and treasures hung from her waist alongside an azure, plaid sarong, and a pair of leather sandles. Orbiting around her like a trio of planets were three glowing orbs of energy.

"Heeheeheeheeheeheeheehee." Izzy giggled excitedly when she discovered that she had also been given a purple, pointed wizard hat decorated with stars and moons. "Izzy's got a wizard hat!"

Noah – being the general caretaker of the redhead on most occasions – immediately knew that a happy Izzy was an Izzy to be feared and quickly yanked the hat off her head. "No! You are not wearing that!"

"WIZARD HAT!" the Psycho Hose Beast cried out as he chucked it over the side of the base – which was situated atop a ridiculously high cliff for some reason – and watched it slowly flutter away and out of her grasp. "How could you!? Wizard Hat could have led us to victory!"

"Right. Because a hat decides whether or not we win this challenge." Noah rolled his eyes.

"Hey, if a hat can decide which house you belong in, then it can do anything!"

"You keep telling yourself that." the cynic decided he was done with the conversation.

Izzy ignored him and returned her attention towards her beloved hat, fruitlessly reaching out for it with a hand. "Oh, Wizard Hat! Izzy will never forget you! Izzy will never let you go! Izzy will- is that a hot elf!?"

Before the unfortunate elfin could duck back out of sight, the Psycho Hose Beast came charging at him and jumped into his arms, pulling him into a crushing hug as she did so. "Take me now, handsome!" she purred seductively, tracing a finger along his collarbone.

"Like, what are you doing?" the handsome elf recoiled with a valley girl accent. When Izzy didn't answer and instead wiggled her eyebrows in a playful manner and began to tease him with other lewd actions too mature to list here, he all but threw her to the ground and ran for the safety of his shop.

If she noticed his fear, Izzy didn't care and instead chose to giggle maniacally from her spot on the ground. "You will be mine," she whispered to herself.

This only lasted a few seconds before the redhead's short attention span kicked in and she quickly focused on something else entirely. With a mischievous smile upon her lips, she reached out for one of the pulsating orbs of thaumaturgic energy. "Hey, Owen! Ya wanna feel my balls?" Izzy grinned, pitching it at her buddy at mach 4.

A long, slimy tongue quickly lashed out and wrapped itself around the glowing ball of energy, drawing it back to its owner with a loud smack! and lick of his chops. "Mmm, magic-y!" Owen giggled.

The human fart machine was practically unrecognizable – that is to say, he wasn't even remotely human. For the most part he vaguely resembled a massively overweight catfish with an enormously round belly that sagged and jiggled like jello with every step of his stumpy, four-toed feet. A short tail with pitiful, serrated fins passively slapped the moss-covered stones every now and again and he had two, meaty arms that were more fat than muscle. Owen's most noticeable feature however, had to be the absolutely gargantuan maw full of pointed, needle-like fangs and an elastic tongue that was far too long for its own good; positioned just above on his upper lip like a thick mustache were a pair of fleshy whiskers and a set of feathery gills on either side of his head. The fish-like creature was utterly colossal, to the point where the jacket he wore was actually composed of two smaller coats stitched together to fit his tremendous girth. He wore little else, other than a water-logged tunic, a few gold rings on his fat fingers and whiskers, and a comically small, black fedora placed upon his head.

Owen's stomach suddenly rumbled angrily and before he knew what was happening, his jaw instinctively swung open and he spat out the previously swallowed bolt of energy back at Izzy with a loud belch. The Psycho Hose Beast easily caught the florid orb with a hand and spun it on her finger like a basketball before returning it to its orbit.

"Hah-hah-hah-hah! Cool!" Owen snickered, licking his lips.

"Now that's what I call some tongue action!" Izzy grinned maniacally. "Wicked!"

"Of course you would think it's 'wicked'. Your vocabulary doesn't contain any variation of the word 'disgusting'." Noah recoiled with distaste.

The cynic looked quite different than he had before. His once tan skin now glowed a mysterious indigo in color, occasionally pulsating with an unknown energy that made the runes and glyphs that decorated his body flare up in response. His once lanky figure had grown significantly, becoming that of a hardworking man that had seen many moons of labor and drudgery. His once brown hair had completely vanished, leaving him completely bald and with nothing more than a short, black beard and soul patch to show for it. What clothes he wore consisted little more than that of a deerskin vest, a pair of baggy trousers held up by a thick, leather belt filled to the brim with artifacts and vestiges from a bygone era, and a knapsack full of scrolls and parchments, the largest of which was easily as big as his entire body; his eyes glowed an unearthly white and he carried an ancient spellbook in his hands.

"Of course, it does! I've heard it lots of times!" Izzy laughed.

"I'll bet you have." Noah sighed.

"Why do you even bother?" Eva wondered.

The cynic shrugged and rubbed his temples. "I've been asking myself that question more and more as of late."

The Female Bully merely grunted with indifference and took to examining her new form with callous eyes. Compared to some of her teammates, not much had changed in her appearance, but she had gained a slightly bigger bust encapsulated in a steel breastplate, a pair of rounded shoulder pads, and several arm, shin, and leg guards that offered her a decent amount of protection without directly hindering her; a pair of technical goggles rested on her head and her ebony hair was pulled back into a ponytail. Eva's most distinctive new feature however, were the pair of absolutely, ridiculously, ludicrously gigantic, mechanical gauntlets that smothered her forearms. The two war machines were so massive and heavy that they were connected to a device clamped to her back just to help her lift them.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Amy suddenly screeched when she caught sight of her reflection in the large, maroon gem in the ground. "What did those /censored/do to me!?"

The Evil Twin was nearly unrecognizable. She looked at her hands with disgust, horrified at the razor-sharp, railroad spike-like claws that tipped each one of her fingers and the immense amount of strength she felt beneath each one. Her forearms were smothered by a pair of crimson gauntlets trimmed in gold faded from scorching heat and she could feel her powerful muscles ripple unpleasantly beneath her skin; her skin . . . she felt disdain for it the most. It had turned an ashen purple in color and was no longer soft and smooth to the touch, but instead crusty and hard like the interlocking plates and scales of a crocodile's hide. Amy shuddered at the feel of her tongue – her long, forked tongue – roll over the fangs that now uncomfortably lined her gums and she felt a wave of discomfort come over her at how well her glowing, orange eyes allowed her to see. Beneath the crimson chest plate that left her armored midriff exposed she felt an unnatural flame burn inside her heart, clawing and fighting its way out. She ignored it and instead suppressed another torrent of curses when she noticed that a pair of draconian wings that unfolded from the base of her spine wrapped around her hips like a skirt. Her claws dug into the worn stone beneath her feet, leaving molten marks in their wake; a horned helmet conjoined to a long series of plating that covered what she could have sworn was a tail of some kind protected her skull.

"Be thankful that you at least have legs." Scarlett hissed with disdain.

The Quiet Brainiac's transformation was quite startling. From the waist up she had retained most of her human looks, save for a few details. Her eyes had turned a poisonous yellow in color and her once green pupils had transformed into a pair of blackened slits, like that of a hungry snake. Hollow fangs dripping with potent venom curved over her lips, waiting to sink themselves into unsuspecting flesh and her once delicate fingers were now tipped with slashing claws the color of bronze. Arm guards the color of copper protected her boughs and a burnished crown ringed in olive branches shielded her head; her hair had turned a dark brown in color and was pulled back into a ponytail and a toga the color of snow cupped her now ample cleavage. From the hips down however, her legs had been completely replaced by the long, muscular tail of a serpent with dark, emerald scales pockmarked by faded brown diamonds ringed in black.

Jasmine couldn't help but smirk. "Well, now then, at least yer insides now match yer outsides, if ya know what I'm sayin'."

"Unfortunately." Scarlett glowered.

The Australian Outback Girl took a small amount of pleasure in that and took to looking at her new fettle. If it was even conceivably possible, she had gotten even stronger than before – her arms and legs were like pillars of solid rock and her abdominals looked as if they were made of iron – and even more sensual in appearance; her bust nearly threatened to burst straight out from her gold plated chest plate. Armored hip and shin guards protected her lower regions and she wore a verdant shendyt trimmed in gold at her waist. Halcyon bracers sheathed her forearms, golden shoulder pads hugged her back, and her black locks had been braided and pulled back into a ponytail. Blue and orange tribal markings patterned her face, arms, and legs and she carried a large, golden javelin with a silver head and a gleaming emerald as her weapon.

"Whats with all the sheilas havin' so much junk in the trunk?" Jasmine noted with disdain when caught sight of how big her hips had gotten.

"Most likely due to perverted, male game designers and programmers in desperate need of female companionship fulfilling their inner desires or that of the consequently generated fan base," Scarlett surmised with equal contempt. "Alternatively, this is how Chris either commonly gets his gratification or appeals to viewers to further increase the ratings."

For some odd reason, all eyes instinctively turned toward Cody at the remark.

"Um . . . don't look at me, heh-heh-heh." he chuckled nervously while his face flushed a bright red. While his time together with Samey had indeed tempered his hormones, it was hard to forget the days when he was so desperate for a female companion he could have been compared to a stalker. "I've changed, I swear!"

Samey couldn't hep but blush as well, earning a look of utter disgust from her sister. "I'll say you have."

The Geek had nearly been completely transformed. All of his digits had been replaced with gray, cybernetic copies that glowed a mysterious blue energy between the joints. Seamless chrome paneling took up the shape and form of his arms, albeit slightly more fit than before, and traveled up to his rounded shoulders; the limb moved with the soft sound of high-tech machinery in its socket. A neuro-sensor had clamped itself over his spine, encompassing his chest and torso in a series of gray and white metal plates that met at a glowing, blue core in his chest that sparked and crackled with an unknown, magical energy; Cody's legs had also been replaced with cybernetic enhancements. He could almost feel the circuits and wires buzz with excitement at the mere shuffling of his mechanized feet. His brown hair had been shaved off on one side and swept over the other in a thick curtain, covering half of the pulsating, blue visor that obscured his eyes. Strapped to his back and hanging off his hip was a large canister with what looked to be a strange hourglass giving off an unusual amount of odd, azure energy strapped inside, pulsing every now and again as if it were trying to burst free. Clutched tightly in the digits of his artificial hand was a double headed scythe with luminous, blue plasma blades that thrummed and hummed at the slightest movement.

"Whoa! Check me out!" Cody grinned as he experimentally gave his weapon a spin, leaving twin trails of cobalt light in its wake. He couldn't help but notice how dexterous and quickly his fingers had responded to his thoughts while he spun the blades like a fire dancer; had he attempted this in the real world, he would have undoubtedly hurt himself or someone else. "It's like I'm right out of that NORT movie!"

All thoughts of his epic new look were quickly forgotten when he caught sight of Samey.

The Good Twin was absolutely stunning. Her teal eyes now gave off a vibrant sheen and a commanding presence, as if she were a being of divine nature that had descended down from on high to mingle with mere mortals. Her smile gleamed like a thousand stars and her long, blonde locks whispered and flowed gently as if they were caught in a breeze beyond mortal understanding. Her once puny frame had increased tenfold and she now in fact stood just a couple heads shorter than Jasmine, her previously scrawny arms now rippling with powerful muscles; considering her attire, they were probably well earned. Her uniform consisted of a heavy golden chest plate crafted from a material celestial in origin, a pair of rounded shoulder guards that cupped her back, and a series of platings and armors that decorated her arms and legs and even encased her fingers in a pair of protective, mystically metal gloves. What really caught Cody's attention however, were the pair of absolutely massive, snowy white wings that protruded from Samey's back – they had to have been nearly six times her height in length – and a broadsword whose very nature seemed to be composed entirely of a white, blinding light. She looked very similar to the painting Gwen had done for her.

"Um . . . wh-what are you looking at?" she asked anxiously when she noticed Cody starring at her.

Jasmine chuckled and playfully punched her friend in the shoulder. "I'd say the lil' bugger's lookin' at you, mate."

"R-Really?"

"Uh . . . um, er . . . y-yeah . . . yeah, I am." Cody tried to find his words as he was forced to tilt his head back to look the two girls in the eye. He was use to be dwarfed by the Australian – virtually everybody was – but he couldn't help but feel a little intimidated when is girlfriend now looked like she could have stopped a runaway train with her bare hands.

"Both of your auras are a lovely shade of redish pink." Dawn smiled brightly, clutching her hands with elation. "Oh, it fills me with great joy to see two soulmates so happy!"

"S-Soul . . . soulmates?" Samey echoed with disbelief.

Cody looked like he was going to faint, though from whether it could have been from happiness or dread was unknown.

Amy looked like she was going to blow a gasket at the sight of the dreamy expression on her sister's face.

Dawn however, didn't look all that much different from her usual self, but she certainly felt different. From a passing glance, one could note that her pointed ears had grown more pronounced and were filled with dangling, hoop earrings – two in the right, one in the left – and that her platinum locks now had streaks of silver and bronze between them. Her eyes had faded to a calming, turquoise green in color, with a bright twinkle that gave off the impression that she was wise well beyond her years and perhaps even older than she looked, if that was even possible. The Moonchild wore a strapless top composed of leaves skillfully tied together with twigs and vines that curved to cup her small bust. A pair of bird skulls and feathers, among other trinkets, were clasped to a belt with a brass buckle that encircled her waist and held up a skirt intricately woven together from long grasses, reeds, and petals. Guards made of reinforced bark and petrified wood were skillfully tied to her arms and legs by creepers and a tiara of brightly colored flowers and grasses encompassed her head, effortlessly weaving in with the individual strands of her hair.

The pale girl curiously looked at her palm and noticed how her veins were a darker color and didn't feel right. She was constantly aware of her surroundings on some level and was almost constantly aware of the dull sensation of blood flowing throughout her body; this was different. It felt . . . strange.

With an experimental flex of her fingers, Dawn gasped with surprise when a tendril covered in thorns smoothly and painlessly emerged from her open palm, curling to face her. A pod that had swollen at the tip suddenly burst open into a blooming pink flower of sweet fragrance.

"Ugh. Just when I thought you couldn't get any creepier." Amy shuddered, scowling when she snorted hot ash from her nose.

"Says the dragon lady." Cody remarked, earning snickers of amusement from Jasmine and Samey.

"Why you little-"

The Geek yelped and instinctively jumped back before he was unexpectedly swallowed in a blast of blue light and disappeared. A few seconds later, he reappeared a short distance away in another pulse of blue energy, starring at his hands in wonder and amazement. "Whoa . . ." Cody whispered. " Did I just teleport?"

It was then that he noticed a strange, ghostly trail stretched between him and the base where a wispy afterimage of himself stood amongst his astounded teammates, offering a friendly wave. "No, wait! I must be a time traveler!" he exclaimed with excitement. "Neat!"

"And it looks like Cody's discovered his abilities!" Chris' disembodied voice rang loud and thunderous like the bellowing of a tyrannical god. "If you look at the bottom of your screen, you'll see a set of abilities. Each one has a cool-down that keeps you from using that ability for a certain amount of time. That way everyone's balanced and no one is too overpowered."

"Pfft. Right. And time travel isn't overpowered." Noah scoffed.

Cody stole a look at his abilities and his eyes widened when he set sights on one of his three abilities. "Wait, I can rewind? Awesome!"

Without a moment's hesitation, he activated the ability and watched as his hand autonomously reached for the canister on his back on its own accord and yanked a long cord. The mysterious hourglass-like device inside hummed for a second before it whined and gave off a loud roar, enveloping Cody in a wave of azure energy. A deafening bang! rang through the air as he reappeared back in the base, followed by burst of blue light when his afterimages all pulled themselves back together.

"Alright, I know I said before and everything, but . . . this is awesome!" the Geek crowed; Samey couldn't hep but chuckle at her boyfriend's joy.

"And that's not the only trick up your sleeves!" Chris continued to explain. "Your final ability is your ultimate, a very powerful tool that, if used correctly, has the potential to turn around the entire game for your team!"

"Or, you know, troll your team with your Tempered Fate." Noah muttered sourly under his breath.

Amy recoiled. "Wait, you're telling me that my ultimate is turning into a dragon!? Disgusting!"

"It seems you have a rather short cool-down on it as well." Scarlett observed, staring at her teammate. Positioned above her and everyone else's head was a bar of basic information showcasing their current health and tabs on their unique abilities, as well as other statistics that weren't overly important at the moment.

"By that logic, you'll be a strong initiator." Noah concluded.

"Meaning . . ?"

The cynic pinched the brow of his nose. "It means, you walking hand bag, that you'll be the one to start the fights. You dive in and we follow suit, got that?"

Amy groaned. "Ugh, I can't believe this!"

"Look at this way, toots. You could be a walking seafood platter." Noah nodded toward Owen, whom was currently distracting himself by repeatedly swallowing and regurgitating Izzy's balls.

Jasmine watched as the Evil Twin cried out with disgust and stormed off towards the bottom-most lane, leaving a trail of black, clawed footprints where the ground and grass had been scorched in her wake. "So . . . I guess we go to our lanes?"

"Well, if this is anything like the game it's so heavily based on, there are three lanes and the jungle. Normally teams are made up of five people, not ten, so we're going to have to make some adjustments." Noah ran over the statistics.

"In that case, why don't you take leadership for this round?" Jasmine suggested. "You seem to know your way 'round the bush enough."

The cynic was slightly taken aback by this, as he was never in charge of anything. This was mostly because he didn't want to be in charge, even at the things he was good at; he preferred to just hang out in the background while someone else hogged all the attention. "Um . . . okay, so, normally the top lane has a tank or a juggernaut, the mid lane has a mage, the bot lane has an DPS and a support, and the jungle has . . . well, a jungler."

"Such creative names this game has." Scarlett rolled her eyes.

Noah ignored the sarcastic comment. "Since our team has twice as many players, we'll have to make adjustments. I'll take Owen and Izzy mid with me; we'll have a tank, a strong damage dealer, and me as support."

"Hahahaha awesome!" Owen grinned a wide-mouthed smile. "It'll be just like old times!"

"Wonderful," Noah sighed, knowing that he was in for a rough time. "Anyway, the other lanes will follow a similar structure. Jasmine, you'll be taking Cody and Samey with you top since you three seem to work so well together."

"Ace!" C'mon, guys!" the Australian gave a thumbs off. With her spear slung over her shoulder, she headed towards the top lane.

Samey swallowed nervously and glanced at her enormous wings. There was no way she would be able to walk with them, much less run and dash and dodge and weave through a fight without tripping over herself and giving the enemy a clear opening; she would have to fly.

"I know you can do this," Cody encouraged her. "Besides, this is a video game. If you do crash and burn, it won't hurt!"

The Good Twin nodded and tightened her grip on her holy sword, doing her best to put the image of her being shot out of he sky out of her head. With a nervous breath, she gave an experimental flap of her wings and yelped when she suddenly bounced a foot in the air.

"Hey, not bad!" Cody smiled. "I think you're getting the hang of this!"

Samey blushed a deep crimson and did her best to try and steady herself as she slowly followed Jasmine towards the top lane with Cody by her side to offer her support.

"Eva, you'll be jungling-"

"And what is that supposed to mean?" the Female Bully gave him an accusing look.

"It means, Ms. Man Hands, that you'll be mostly fighting monsters to gain special buffs and gold. Your main job however, is to come screaming out of the jungle at mach 4 to lay waste to anyone who so much looks at our team the wrong way." Noah explained I words that he was pretty sure she would b able to understand, slightly irritated at having been interrupted.

Surprisingly pleased with her task, Eva gave no further argument and lumbered off towards the left side of the jungle that stretched between the three lanes.

"That leaves you two," the cynic turned toward Scarlett and Dawn. "Seeing as how she's already there throwing a tantrum, you'll be taking bot lane with Amy."

"Thrilling." the Quiet Brainiac rolled her eyes as she undulated her serpentine body and slithered down the steps of their base towards the aforementioned bottom lane with the Moonchild at her heels.

(Chris-Terra Confessional – My, aren't we cold-blooded?)

Scarlett- "As predicted, Amy continues to prove herself to be quite the brat. The more we express our dislike for one another however, the less likely it will be believed that we are a part of any alliance. Which – just for clarification – is essentially the only reason that I have not cut out her vocal cords at this point." she grumbled sourly as she stroked he edge of a knife in a calming manner.

---

Harold was pretty sure he was going to kill himself before the challenge was over. The match hadn't even begun – the minions hadn't even spawned yet! - and he already wanted it to be over, if for no other reason than to be rid of his teammates. Being an avid gamer in his spare time, it was difficult to stoop down to the level of mere n00bs, much less cooperate with them, but this was a whole new hell on earth.

"Hey, Doris! Feel free to yell for help!" Duncan gloated as he arrogantly brushed past him with his monstrous mace over his shoulder; the mere clip alone was enough to knock the breath from the Dweeb's lungs.

Harold had to admit he was tad satisfied when Courtney flashed the punk a withering look.

"Yup, just blowing people to smithereens." Scott gave a toothy grin and earned an eye roll.

Inwardly, she was cringing. As much as it disgusted her, she had to actually agree with Duncan: he looked like a rat. And even worse, his breath smelled like a noxious combination of mud, soot, and soiled firecrackers laced with gunpowder. With a growl of hatred, the Type A dashed off towards an open path into the jungle and disappeared in a cloud of leaves.

Scott sighed lovingly. "She's so hot."

"Agreed." Duncan didn't even flinch as he 'carelessly' let the blunt end of his morning star fall on the dirt farmer's head, hammering his head into the ground like a nail. Normally, this would have been more than enough to put a person six feet under and reduce their skull to an unidentifiable, bloody pulp, but the Devious was – miraculously – somehow still alive, if not now sporting a massive headache.

"OW! That hurt!"

"I'd advise you go find some fruits of honey fruits for your wounds," Harold told him. "They're this giant, green fruit that look like big raspberries. If my memory serves, they normally grow along the river."

"I'm fine." Scott growled, shooting Duncan a look as he pulled his head out of the ground and brushed himself off.

"But-"

"I'm fine!"

The Dweeb sighed and rubbed his temples with his free hand. "I knew I should have put a healer in this lane with us when I was dividing up the teams . . ."

"You mean when Courtney divided up the teams." Duncan smirked. "Babe's so attracted to me, she put us in different lanes just so she could concentrate. Can't blame her I guess."

"Pfft, yah right." Scott scoffed. "Yer about as handsome as my pappy's behind."

"Why you-"

"Knock it off!" Harold barked. "I mean- gosh! Would it kill you to cooperate with each other just once!"

The dirt farmer shrugged. "I dunno. Probably."

The geek sighed and wondered what he had done to deserve this kind of punishment. "Anyways, if we need help, we can call our teammates to com rescue us."

"You can do that?" Scott raised a singed eyebrow.

"Just look at the button in the bottom corner of your screen and imagine yourself pressing it." Harold instructed.

Not two seconds after he said that than did a torrent of high-pitched pings accompanied by a storm of blue flags come ringing through the air, relentlessly bombarding everyone on the map with their obnoxious sound.

"For the love of Faker, don't spam it!" Harold yelled.

"For honor and glory, comrades!" Duncan's voice echoed deep and ethereal; a small speaker icon had appeared above his head and continued to repeat the line, much to the Dweeb's ire.

"I see you've found the voice line button . . ."

The Dweeb barely suppressed a yelp as a razor-sharp dagger sailed mere inches past his head and sunk itself about halfway into the ground. A sudden gust of wind and a flash of white light swept past him and before he knew it, Courtney had inexplicably appeared at the spot where the knife had been, taking a fighting stance with weapons drawn.

"What's the problem? Where's the trouble?" she looked around, greatly confused and annoyed. "I mean for crying out loud, the game hasn't even started and you guys are in trouble!?"

Harold sighed. "No, that was just Scott being a troll. It's probably best you just ignore the pinging altogether."

"And what if you're in actual danger?" Courtney challenged.

"Well then we retreat."

"What's that?" Scott suddenly butted in.

"It's like running away, but manlier."

The Type A rolled her eyes and threw another one of her many daggers over her shoulder back into the depths of the jungle; short second later, she vanished in a flash of white.

"For honor and glory, comrades!" Duncan shouted for the umpteenth time in a row.

"Will you stop that!?"

---

Noah had to admit, for a multiplayer online battle arena generated in a virtual reality generated by the show that constantly tormented him on a regular basis, it was rather well made. Enormous trees as tall as redwoods reached for the expanse of the sky, their just barely stretching across the lane. Ferns and mushrooms that dwarfed a man blanketed the undergrowth and vines and creepers strangled and choked virtually everything in sight. Skinks and antler mice skittered through the leaf litter and birds of bizarre species crowed and cawed from the canopy overhead.

Most of this however, was drowned out by the melodic sound of a lute.

"Where did you even get that?" the cynic asked.

"Duh, Izzy's a wizard, remember?" the Psycho Hose Beast replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Noah certainly didn't remember the redhead ever summoning a lute in the past few minutes. "I . . . don't think it works like that."

"You don't dictate what Izzy can or can't do!"

The cynic would have responded with a sarcastic comment had he not been constantly bombarded by what felt like a thousand mosquitoes were eating him alive."Ugh, we must be getting close, these fairy bites are getting more frequent." he remarked, ignoring the fairy's pitiful demands that he stop, look, and listen at random intervals. [1]

The trio soon came upon a gigantic, ancient statue covered in moss and creepers sculpted into the likeness of a mighty sentinel wielding a torch. Placed in the holder was a large ruby the size of a small car that glowed an ominous red in color; a faint ring of green energy circumstanced around the enormous statuette.

"What now?" Owen asked, hungrily licking his chops.

"We wait until Chris tells us to start," Noah shrugged. "Or until one of us dies. Either one works."

Not two seconds after he said there was he suddenly nailed in the head by something small, hard, and round. When his head no longer pounded like a drum, he noticed a soft hissing sound and looked down at the ground, took note of the multiple bombs lying nonchalantly at his feet, and realized one simple truth.

KA-BOOM! BOOM! BANG! BOOM! KA-POW!

"Never mind!" the cynic cried. "Apparently rules and etiquette mean nothing on this show! Wait, what am I saying!?"

"Not much. Not after I'm done with you."

Noah blinked and squinted his eyes to peer through the smoke and haze, cursing under his breath when he saw two figures approaching them. One of them was an absolute mountain of a man and looked like he could have felled trees with a single punch of his monstrous hands – that, or the elephantine morning star that he was ominously patting in his hand. The second figure might as well have been the giant's pet hyena, given how he hobbled along with a hunched back and was cackling like a lunatic.

"Today's a perfect day for some may- OOMPH!" Scott was interrupted when a large ball of shimmering planted itself firmly in his face.

"Oooh! Orb of destruction!" Izzy smiled wildly as the sphere returned to its orbit around her neck like a boomerang. "I wonder what that does!" she grinned like the psycho she was.

"AAAAAAAHH!" the Devious wailed as he dodged a barrage of arcane bolts. "I need healing! I need healing!"

"What're you looking at me for?" Duncan cocked a brow.

And with that, Noah smacked Scott upside the head with a spell from his magic tome, ending him. The bombardier's corpse fell to the ground a soft thump! and disappeared in wave of blue light a few seconds later.

"Typical. The doofus leaves me to do all the work." Duncan scowled at the sight of his fallen teammate; truth be told, he had wanted to do that a long time ago himself and was rather upset that he hadn't been the one to do it first. The iron revenant adjusted the grip on his morning star, did a quick once over of his abilities, and assumed a charging stance.

"Oh, no." Owen gulped nervously when the punk was engulfed in a blast of searing, green flames – how it was possible he was even more scary than before was a mystery – and charging at him like a runaway train, roaring at the top of his lungs with his mace ready and waiting to bash in someone's skull.

"Hang on, Big-O!" Izzy cried. The psychopath took another one of her magical orbs and pitched it at the enormous catfish-man's feet. A sudden rushing sound filled the air as a portal beneath him and swallowed him whole, just as Duncan came hurling past the spot he had been mere moments before like a comet.

The Delinquent cursed his misfortune and swore again when he realized that he was heading straight for a wall. A very big, very hard, and very sturdy that – to his knowledge – would most likely not move out of the way. "Bite me."

WHAM! CRUNCH!

"Ooh, that's gonna hurt in the morning!" Izzy winced as Duncan barreled straight into the wall without stopping.

Now he was in hot water. He was behind the enemy with no support hero – or any hero, for that matter – so, he did what any sensible person wouldn't do: he decided he wasn't going down without a fight and began to wildly swing his mace in an attempt to decapitate anyone unfortunate to be within range.

"RAAAAGH!" he cried as he attempted to bring it down on Izzy.

"Ha ha! Better luck next time!" she cackled when she danced out of the way.

"Hold still!" Duncan roared.

"Make me!"

Noah was contemplating whether or not he should intervene and then remembered that this was Izzy he was talking about, the girl who regularly got into fights with the show's cook, wrestled wild animals at the drop of a hat, and considered blowing things up as a hobby.

"Fear not, brave warrior! I'm coming to-"

"Can it, Doris, and just help me!" Duncan spat as he viciously swung his mace at Izzy's head, only to receive another blast of arcane energy to the gut that knocked him flat on his back. "OOF!"

Harold decided he would forgive the punk's spiteful attitude for now – it was the middle of a battle and tempers did have a habit of flaring at the worst of times – and brandished his battle ax, prepared to decapitate Izzy in a single swing.

The Psycho Hose Beast however, saw this coming and smiled wickedly as she snapped her fingers. With a sudden roar, a portal opened up in the ground beside her. With a disgusting, slurping noise, a long, slimy tongue came slithering out from the depths beyond and expertly coiled itself around the charging nerd. Before he even knew what was happening, the tongue tightened and withdrew like the string of a yo-yo, disappearing into the portal and taking Harold with it; the Dweeb screamed and furiously clawed at the dirt, but it was fruitless.

"Hmmm, not bad!" Owen chuckled as he hauled himself out of the swirling portal and patted his stomach.

A disturbing gurgling sound filled the air as his gelatinous belly squirmed and churned violently and the anthropomorphic catfish's cheeks puffed up as he fought to keep his recent meal down.

"Owen! Over here!" Noah called, pointed towards Duncan just as the delirious punk was climbing to his feet.

The fart machine did as he was told and turned himself exactly forty-five degrees and spat out a drool-drenched Harold at his teammate, knocking the two of them down in a slimy tangle of arms, legs, and weapons.

"I feel violated," Harold shuddered. "The things I have seen . . ."

"Get off me!" Duncan cried.

"Uh-uh, not happening." Noah frowned. The tattoos on his body and his eyes glowed an bright blue as he held out his arm and mic-dropped his magical tome on the ground. A wind kicked up as the pages were blown open and reached down with trembling hands to pull out a crackling, pulsating ball of energy from within its depths. The rune mage then thrust his hands forward and sent the orb flying straight at the two warriors.

"/censored/." the Delinquent cursed when the ball of arcane energy exploded and surrounded them in an hourglass-like prison, trapping and rooting them in one spot. No matter how he struggled and strained, he found that he couldn't access any of his abilities or even movie, which meant he was stuck letting Owen's drool slowly work its way into his ears and armor, which was none too pleasant.

Luckily for him, he needn't suffer long. Izzy and Noah were more than happy to finish the two of them off with a few well-timed auto-attacks, landing each of them a kill.

"Aw, nice!" Owen cheered. "We make such a great team!"

"Yeah, we do!" Izzy excitedly pumped her fists, wincing when she felt an unexpected twinge pull at her muscles; apparently she hadn't made it out as unscathed as she thought. "I could use a little health though. Whaddya say, Noah, ya wanna inject some of your nice, warm health into me?" she leered at him.

The cynic barely suppressed a shudder of disgust and pulled his hands together. The runic symbols across his body glowed a soft white and the bar above Izzy's head was refilled to its maximum.

"Whoa, how'd you do that?" Owen wondered.

"Isn't it obvious, Fish for Brains? I healed her, simple as that."

"But isn't that bad for you?"

"Well, according to my passive, I constantly regenerate my health every few seconds whenever I'm out of combat," the bookworm explained. "Seeing as how we're currently not fighting and/or running for our lives, I think we should safe. At least, for now. Knowing this show, I'll later regret saying that."

"MINIONS HAVE SPAWNED!" Chris' voice suddenly rang out; quite literally everyone across the map winced as they covered their ears.

"Great, just when I thought we would be rid of him for a decent amount of time." Noah grumbled as a small platoon of diminutive, mindless, doll-like minions dressed in a royal red rags and wielding pathetic wooden swords and shields came strutting around and through his legs without much care.

"Hey, it could always be worse." Owen shrugged as he waddled after the minions.

"I'm almost afraid to say this, but how could this be any worse?"

"Well . . ." Izzy tapped her chin in thought as he pitched a few bolts of magic at the enemy turret without even bothering to look. "You could be with Dave and Sky, wherever they are."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

---

Scott tapped his foot impatiently as he waited for Duncan and Harold to respawn. A few seconds later and his two teammates spawned back in at their team's base.

"Well that was a disaster." Harold frowned.

"You're telling me, I got teleported into a wall!" Duncan pouted.

"I got eaten by a catfish-man!" Harold protested.

"Yeah never mind, that is pretty bad." Duncan nodded in agreement.

"How are we supposed to beat them? They've got a bunch of ranged attacks and we can't barely touch them!" Scott exclaimed.

"Well, I didn't get the chance to use it but I've got a firestrike ability," Harold spoke up, "And your bombs are a ranged attack, you've just gotta spam them."

"Mmm, spam." Scott licked his lips.

"Not that kind of spam!" Harold snapped. "I'm talking like what you did earlier when you kept pinging for help." The thought just annoyed Harold more.

"Oh, right. That reminds me." Scott gave a malicious grin as he promptly pressed the 'I need healing' button over and over.

"I need healing! I need healing! I need healing! I need healing!" He pinged above his head.

"Shut up! Gosh!" Harold stomped his foot down.

xxx

"Onward comrades, we shall valiantly defeat our foes with magic and might!" Leonard declared as he lead Geoff and Bridgette through the top lane.

"And good vibes!" Geoff added with a cool grin.

"Indeed," Leonard nodded, "Together we can vanquish them. Nothing will stand in our way!"

"Whoa, you should totally be like, a motivational speaker or something, dude." Geoff told him.

"Your adulation does not go unnoticed, colleague," Leonard thanked him, "However I have already chosen a career path in alchemy and wizardry."

"That's cool too, bro! You do you." Geoff beamed. Bridgette couldn't help but smile at her boyfriend's kindness.

(Chris-Terra Confessional – Let's take a metal and turn it into gold!)

Bridgette- "Geoff is just the kindest person I've ever met! The way he encourages Leonard to follow his dreams is just so inspiring. People like him really restore my faith in this world and I'm so happy to call him my boyfriend." She smiled.

---

"So what abilities do you have?" Cody asked Samey. The two tagged along behind Jasmine who led the way.

"Well I guess I'm mostly supposed to heal you guys." Samey said, flipping her flaming sword out for a staff with glowing yellow energy coming from the tip. She attached a beam of the flowing health to Cody as he hopped around. "But I also have a dive bomb ability. I wonder what that does."

"So what's your ultimate? Apparently mine freezes time!" Cody grinned. This challenge was all of his wildest nerd dreams come true.

"It says resurrect so I guess that means I can bring people back from the dead?" Samey guessed.

"That might just be the most powerful ultimate ability in the game!" Jasmine exclaimed. "Mine just makes me bigger and stronger, if that's even possible!" She chuckled.

"Anything's possible, adversary." Came Leonard's squeaky voice.

"So, do we wait till things start or...?" Jasmine wondered.

"Normally we wait until the announcer states that the minions have spawned, but in this case I suppose we could begin our battle now." Leonard explained.

"Alright then, let's get to it!" Jasmine said, raising her spear. The amazon initiated the fight by hurling the javelin at Leonard. The weapon missed by about a foot and now Jasmine was weaponless.

Jasmine shielded herself from Leonard's magic blasts with her arm as she ran into to retrieve her spear. "There's gotta be a better way to execute that." She remarked as she ran back. Samey quickly hooked up her healing beam to Jasmine and replenished the health she had lost.

Cody dodged the small water bubbles that Bridgette lobbed at him by blinking out of harms way. He then moved into the back line and began hitting Geoff with his glowing scythe.

In response, Geoff flung quills from his arms at the techno geek. Cody blinked to Geoff's other side to avoid the quills but was met with more. One of them penetrated his shoulder and his health bar dwindled.

Cody was slightly taken aback by the hit and was caught off guard when Geoff suddenly dashed through him. Now Cody's health was at a sliver. Samey flew to him but just before Geoff finished him off with another quill, Cody rewound back behind Jasmine with a loud bang that startled Geoff and Bridgette.

"Turns out I have less health than I thought!" Cody gulped. But his worries weren't over. Samey had flown to him but now that he had rewound, she was left stranded with the enemy.

The angel pulled out her flaming sword and began swinging to protect herself. She hit Leonard who began throwing magic blasts at her.

Samey winced as one of the shots hit her in the cheek. Cody saw his girlfriend in trouble and quickly blinked in. He attempted to distract Leonard by attacking him from behind, but was instead met with a barrage of Bridgette's water bubbles.

Jasmine stormed in and began slashing with her spear. Seeing that Bridgette was now healing Geoff, who's health had begun to get low, she went for her.

Bridgette saw that she was no match for the amazon and tried to flee. Jasmine took her spear and and slammed the ground with it. Soon, a purple danger zone appeared on the ground and smoke began rising from the earth.

The mermaid was slowed and the health from the bar above her head slowly began to dwindle.

"Help!" She cried.

Geoff whipped around and fired off a line of quills at Jasmine. They all hit her in the arm, causing the amazon to cry out in pain and clutch the appendage.

Samey flew over to heal her but quickly found herself unable to move.

Bridgette had deployed an aqua prison that now had Jasmine and Samey trapped in it.

With the two girls held in place, Geoff and Leonard began attacking. Geoff flung sets of quills at them while Leonard attacked with his magic blasts.

Since Samey was healing Jasmine the whole time, the tank wasn't too dangerously low by the time the aqua prison deactivated.

Not wanting any more trouble, Jasmine and Samey tried to run back towards their turret. However, Leonard wasn't going to let them off so easy.

The wizard raised his staff and a storm of thunder clouds began swirling overhead. A bolt of lightning struck his wooden staff and coursed through his body. "LIGHTNING BOLT!" He decreed, aiming two fingers at the amazon and angel.

The lightning shot from his fingers and blasted the two helpless girls, killing them both.

Cody's eyes widened and he knew he had to get the heck out of dodge before he joined their fate. He blinked away and Geoff tried to dash after him. "It's not worth it, comrade!" Leonard stopped him. "He will retreat to his turret where we cannot go unless accompanied by minions."

Geoff nodded in understanding. "So, how long is that one on a cool-down?" Bridgette raised an eyebrow, referring to the lightning display Leonard had just put on.

"It is long, but can be used quite effectively to finish enemies off." Leonard answered. "Now if you don't mind, some healing would be appreciated." He requested.

"Oh, right!" Bridgette said, taking some of the water from the wave that carried her along. She willed it from her hands to Leonard and it washed over him, replenishing his lost health.

"Many thanks," Leonard bowed, "Now it is time to move onward!" He declared as a group of minions led the way to team Sisikwew's turret.

---

"I can't believe they made me a dragon!" Amy pouted as smoke billowed from her nostrils. "This is all kinds of disgusting!"

"And I'm all kinds of fed up with your incessant grumbling." Scarlett narrowed her eyes at the back of Amy's scaly head.

"Please, can we all just get along? It would make this challenge much easier." Dawn tried to reason.

"No!" Both Scarlett and Amy snapped at the peacemaker.

Dawn sighed. "Very well."

And with that, Scarlett and Amy got back to their quarrel.

Meanwhile, not too far down on the other side of the lane was Leshawna, Trent, and Lindsay. It seemed Trent's sleep deprivation had transferred over into the virtual world since his eyes wee still bloodshot, the bags hanging darker and heavier.

"Yaay, I'm a unicorn!" Lindsay cheered for probably the eighth time since they'd left their base. The lovable lame-brain danced and skipped around happily with her horse hooves.

"Girl, we get it, you're a unicorn." Leshawna rolled her eyes. "Wish I was a unicorn instead of this nasty squid thang." She muttered under her breath.

"So how long do you think this'll take?" Trent wondered between yawns.

"As long as your droopy behind isn't slowin' us down, it shouldn't take all that long at all." Leshawna responded.

"Sorry, Dave was keeping me up all night." Trent explained, letting out another yawn. "He just won't stop talking about Sky!"

"So that's why those two fools ain't here?" Leshawna raised an eyebrow.

Trent nodded. "Jasmine helped me and Courtney lock them in the outhouse until they settle their differences."

"They're gonna be there a while, huh?" She guessed.

"Yeah." Trent responded knowingly.

"I kind of hope they don't make up too quickly. Maybe then I can have at least one solid night of guaranteed sleep." Trent wished.

"Guys, guess what!" Lindsay spoke up with glee, seemingly overflowing with excitement.

"Lemme guess, you're a unicorn?" Leshawna deadpanned, already having been sick of the dumb blonde.

"Well I am," She began, "But look! It's the other team! Hi other team!" She gave a friendly wave to Scarlett, Amy and Dawn.

However, the three were too busy bickering to pay attention. Scarlett and Amy were engaged in a war of words while Dawn tried desperately to warn them of the imminent threat.

"Please, you must listen!" Dawn pleaded, tugging on Scarlett's arm as it was all she could really do.

"What could you possibly want you insignificant speck." Scarlett hissed, her boiling point overflowing at this point.

Her answer was an arrow flying right past her head. The projectile embedded itself in the tree behind her. Scarlett turned sharply to see the three members of Team Kihew.

"Oh. Now I see." She nodded.

Leshawna followed up Trent's arrow by leaping in with idol in tow. The muscular squid woman landed in front of Amy and, to everyone's satisfaction, clobbered her over the head with the two-ton bronze idol.

Amy was sent flying back where she connected with a rock, taking out a solid portion of her health. "Oh cool, I get added damage if I knock them into something." Leshawna grinned, eyeing Scarlett.

The brainiac's eyes widened as Leshawna raised the idol and swung down. However, she was just quick enough and slithered out of harms way. She then quickly wrapped herself around Leshawna and squeezed tight.

The snake lady watched Leshawna's health bar diminish. She was squeezing so tight she could feel her body cutting into Leshawna's muscles.

Scarlett finally let go and slithered off before Leshawna could retaliate. Luckily for her, the constriction had winded the sassy teen.

"Lindsay, heal her!" Trent instructed, seeing as the dumb blonde was too stupid to realize she had abilities.

"Oh yeah!" Lindsay smiled. She reached a hand out and yellow powder expelled from her palm, washing over Leshawna and bringing her health back up some.

Trent continued to fire arrows at the three girls but didn't seem to be finding many shots. One of them however, flew past Amy who had just gotten back up. The dragon girl yelped and instinctively shielded herself with her wings, which rose up from her torso to cover the whole front half of her body.

Several arrows hit her shield and dropped to the ground. When Amy lowered her wings, she was struck with another arrow. Luckily for her, her ultimate had charged up. Without a moment's notice, Amy began to transform into a fully-fledged dragon.

Her wings shifted from her waist up to her back. Her jawline lengthened and her teeth grew from her gums. Her entire body grew about five times it's original size and a tail snaked it's way from her behind.

Amy let out a roar and dived right for Trent.

"Oh shi-" The musician was cut off when the dragon clobbered him, tearing him to shreds.

"HEEELP!" He cried out for Lindsay and Leshawna.

The latter tried to distract the beast by beating it with her idol, however Amy didn't seem to be bothered much by this. She wanted Trent dead.

Lindsay bit her lip, not knowing what to do. Then she remembered she could heal. Oh yeah. That's a thing.

She sprayed a cloud of healing at Trent, but she had to get close in order for it to be effective, and she definitely did not want to do that.

"I apologize for this, friend!" Dawn said as vines grew from her palms. She clenched her fists around them and began whipping Lindsay with them.

"Ow! Ow!" She cried each time one of the vines slapped her.

Seeing her health lowering, Scarlett threw out her tail and wrapped it around Lindsay's thin waist, pulling her in. "Waaaagh!" She cried as she was yanked right up to Scarlett's face. The snake lady bared her fangs and spit a green venom into Lindsay's eyes.

The blonde cried out in pain and tried to rub the harmful chemicals out of her eyes, but it was too late. After a few moments of stumbling, she fell limp to the ground.

By this point, Trent had been mauled to death by Amy who was now morphing back into her humanoid dragon self.

Once she returned, her health dropped back to what it had been before she transformed, which was only a sliver. Leshawna took advantage of the opportunity and clocked her upside the head again, immediately ending her.

Now it wa and Leshawna felt like she had the strength to take them both on. She charged forward and swung her idol forward, hitting Dawn's fragile body and knocking her to the side. A green tentacle spirit began to seep out of one of the eyes of Leshawna's idol and proceeded to slap Dawn silly.

In a desperate attempt to save herself, the plant manipulated placed down a Venus fly trap turret that rooted itself in the ground next to her. It lashed out and bit at Leshawna while Scarlett joined in and slapped at her with her tail.

Leshawna swung her idol one last time, easily taking out the fly trap and slaying Dawn in the process. She then whipped around and began to fend off Scarlett, but the snake lady saw it was a lost fight and slithered back to the safety of her turret.

"Yeah, you'd better run!" Leshawna hollered back at her, shaking her idol. "Now I gotta go find me some health!" She said to herself, quickly retreating as well.

---

The scene cut from the action packed VR to the slightly less action-oriented outhouse. Dave and Sky sat on opposite sides facing away from each other in an attempt to distance themselves from one another. In other words, neither was willing to talk.

After what seemed like ages, Sky finally sighed. "Dave look, we have to settle this or they're not going to let us out."

"We could always lie, you know." Dave suggested.

"Jasmine and Courtney are both smarter than that, they'd see right through it." Sky told him. "We need to work this out."

"You won't listen to me anyway, what's the point?" Dave asked bitterly, turning to look at the gymnast.

"I'm willing to sit here and listen to your side of things if you're willing to do the same." Sky proposed.

Dave just narrowed his eyes and turned around, not saying a word. Sky sighed again; they were never getting out of here.

"You know Sky, you really hurt me. What you did." Dave finally said quietly, still refusing to face her.

"Dave, I . . ." She tried to say, but couldn't find the words.

"You said you liked me, I know you meant it." Dave continued. "I was so happy, finally a girl that I liked liked me back. But then you lashed out at me during the drinking challenge. That really hurt."

Sky frowned, starting to feel really guilty now.

"I didn't want to be there anymore. You ruined it for me." He said coldly. "But you weren't done. At the finale you kissed me. That changed everything. I felt that whatever had happened was over now . . . but then it turned out . . .YOU HAD A BOYFRIEND!" Dave whipped around, staring Sky right in the eyes.

Sky winced. She couldn't look at him with the anger in his eyes. She didn't want to. She wanted to see the Dave she knew before things went so wrong.

"I gave you my heart and you stabbed it a million times. Then you patched it back together, only to tear it apart again." He cried, tears welling up in his eyes. He quickly turned back around and tried to regain his composure. He didn't want Sky to see him crying.

Sky just sat there, awestruck. All this time, she had been trying to convince him it wasn't her fault, yet she never stopped to think how he was feeling. "Dave . . . I feel so bad." She spoke.

"I don't care how you feel." Dave grimaced. "Just try and justify what you did."

---

A/N – Okay, okay, there's a perfectly good explanation as to why this is a two-parter. Well, not really but I didn't want to leave you guys in the dark again. It's been a while since the last chapter and I wanted to get something out. I was having trouble with this for a while, you wouldn't believe how hard those appearance descriptions were!

I also decided to cut this in to two parts because this chapter was already getting quite long and there's still a ton to write. I figured the second half would have enough action and drama to support itself.

Once again, I realize you all don't like two-parters, but I figured this would be better than nothing for another two months. That being said, I've still got the creative juices flowing, so I'll be continuing to write the next half after I've posted this. I can guarantee you will not be waiting two months for the second part. My hope is two weeks but we'll see if that comes to fruition.

Until then, tell me what you thought of this chapter! Each contestant's design alludes to something, most of which are from League of Legends or Overwatch. Can you guess them all?

…

[1] – This is a reference to the Gravity Falls episode "Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons" when Stan, Grenda and Mabel are walking through the forest. I heard somewhere that the whole sequence was a nod to The Legend of Zelda, but I don't play the game so I'm not sure.

...

Next: YOU SHALL NOT PASS, until another two weeks or so, give or take a month...