Hey everyone,
Okay, this chapter is not going to be easy. I am super excited to make something out of Lindilwen that didn't come out of Canon, but I am dreading the path she has to take to get to being that something. Next to that, do I feel slightly anxious about the whole thing that will transpire between the Healer Elf and the Weasleys.
And honestly, the fact that no one ever checked the Weasleys for illegal spellwork after they discovered that a Dark Wizard has been living with them for more than a decade is something I could never really understand and I am very determined to make this fact a reality and then fix it throughout this chapter.
Now onto 1 last thing. For as long as this story has existed, have I been honoring Leonette for the inspiration that he/she brought upon me through some of their own work. However, recently I found a new story that has absolutely captured my attention and that deserves a shout out: The Debt of Time by ShayaLonnie.
Check it out,

Venquine1990
PS. Inspiration comes from Leonette, check out their stories.
PPS. Check out ShayaLonnie, their work is utter gold.

Peter's POV

My life has been a mix of two or three great things and several dozen horrid things for as long as I could remember. My mum had a crazily horrible drunk addiction that went on all the way through the time that she was carrying me, regardless of the fact that this drinking caused her to almost lose me a good three times in nine months.
To make matters worse had her drink addiction caused for her giving birth to me to last three actual days and after this had the woman fallen into a coma that had lasted no less than six years, in which my dad constantly worked his hardest to hurt me and, through it, make me believe my mum's state of health was my fault.

Yet then mum had woken up, which had gone against all of the expectations of the Healers responsible for her, and when she had found out about my actual abuse she had turned against my dad in an attempt to protect me from further harm. However, dad had not taken lightly to this and had let my mum know this.
And so, only a month after my mum had woken, had I been forced to bury her dead body before becoming a full-fledged orphan as dad had threatened me with disownment if I had carried through burying that betraying little slag as my dad had called her after the officials had first requested if they could start the procedures.
Yet, mum's incredible protection had given me courage and I had opposed my dad, believing I owed it to my mum to pick her like she picked me and after this I had spent the last eleven years switching between several adoptive families, yet always with the request that they would try and resemble my birth parents in front of my friends.

And my friends had been one of the only good things that had ever happened to me, yet the hierarchy that we had established is definitely one that – in the smallest of ways – makes me feel as if I am living with my dad again, yet this isn't something I have ever cared about, not even once in the last seven years I have known them.
Known Jaurion, who has such an amazing heart, such a sweet and caring character, who just wants to care, help and aid, but who can't because the rest of his House is nothing but a bunch of egotistical, selfish, sometimes even abusive bastards who only treat those with popularity and power with even a grain of decent respect.
Known Sirius, who is often pushed down by the reputation of his family and how badly his parents want him to be, what they call, a proper Black and who has therefore grown a true hatred for all things Slytherin and who, outside of his friends, always seems to work his hardest to put as little effort as possible in being responsible.
And known Remus, who has had a similar yet different past from mine, who has been raised to hate certain parts of himself, yet who seems to have been broken under said upraising and who always shows true care for everyone, even those who want to hurt him and who never seems to have any self-confidence or belief in his person.

All of my friends have so many internal issues and personal problems, so many more than I ever had with my drunk dad, my dead mum and my constant switching between families and so I had never actually cared for the fact that James and Sirius often used me as the butt of their jokes or to prepare their pranks on.
Sure, some of the pranks they pulled on me did hurt, but taking them makes me feel stronger and gives me the belief I can take better care of the family we have made together. Cause even though I have sometimes found myself in a new loving home, none of my newly adoptive parents have ever had my heart like my friends did.

And that is what makes me worried above all others. Cause when we got to this amazing world and met the people from the future, was it quite obvious that a large majority of the future group hated me for something I have done in their past and the fact that Remus and Sirius are the only ones with a future self only made things worse.
We then started reading of the future and the instant that we read of Lindilwen and Jaurion being dead, did a tidal wave of guilt and a tornado of disbelief overwhelm me as I just couldn't imagine whatever could have happened for me to betray my friends and lead them and their son to their death, by hands of that monster no less.
Yes, I hate Voldemort and all he stands for because of several reasons. One of them was that many of my parents died at his hands, putting me back into the orphan program, yet this is the least of my reasons. My main reason is Voldemort's stigma being like a fire that ignites the flame of hate and anger between Sirius and his family.

So to then know that, for some reason or another, I went and turned my back on those I always cared so much about and turned my loyalty to that bastard instead is something I just can't fathom, but just now I got a new reason to be heavily worried. We read of Hari's journey to Hogwarts and Ron apparently had a rat.
And while I had made a comment on how unfair it was for Ron to get things second-hand and had after that asked why there had not been a rat amongst the group when they came here, had I instantly understood why Ron only gave a curt answer about his pet dying in the third book and Snuffles giving him his new owl.
And while some people may have believed me to have felt horribly scared and terrified of the fact that I will die in sixteen years, had I personally felt like my future-self got what he deserved, yet I had also thought that the punishment came 12 years late, yet after that Lupin had confused most of us with asking the Healing Elf for help.

And now that the chapter has been read and Jaurion and Sirius are over in one of the alcoves with Snuffles and Hari, who is still softly sleeping and the way that the three others look over the sleeping teen makes me feel a little better, yet I then shake my head and turn it back to focus on the thing that has worried me for some time now.
Making sure that no one is paying me any attention, which is easy as everyone seems to have taken to themselves except for Draco Malfoy, who looks at me with a raised eyebrow, yet I soundlessly tell him: "I love them, I worry." And the boy nods before turning back to his teenage father and his father's closest friend.
I then turn around again and cast a non-verbal, wandless Disillusionment charm on myself before focusing on one of the things we often used to help Remus through his Once a Month issue and feeling the spell stick to my new grey fur, rosy pink paws and long as a worm tail, do I sneeze as it tickles my whiskers.

I then scurry over to where the Weasleys, Lupin and the Water Healing Elf and as I do, do I work my hardest not to sneeze again as I feel a Privacy ward pass me up and while part of me feels horrid for spying on my older friend, do I feel like I need to hear this as my conscience makes me feel horrid for tricking the Weasleys like I did.
"Why? Why did I make them believe I was nothing but a sleeping pet for so long? Why did I believe it right to hide myself with a family like that? And why did I do that so soon after betraying my friends to their murderer? What happened to me? What on earth made me chose my own life over that of my friends, my family?"
Goes through my mind as I hide behind a slightly tilted pillow that lies on the ground and instantly I hear my worst fears come to life. "There just isn't any easy way to say this. All of you, from Arthur and Molly, have various forms of Confundus and other Mind and Personality Altering spells on you, ones that are years and years old."

The Water Elf tells the Weasleys and instantly I feel like crying as this family is much too close and loving of each other to have done it themselves and then Ron asks: "Percy and I are the worst, aren't we?" And I know he asks this because I was his pet, yet I see the Elf shake her head, shocking us both as she says:
"The worst are your mother and your twin brothers. Yes, the spells on you and your brother are the strongest, obviously because he was your pet, but your mother has a spell on her that I personally consider way worse and the twins have a much higher amount of spells on them – all of them Obliviation spells."
This shocks and confuses me and one of the twins asks: "Obliviation spells?" But then the other shocks me as he snarls: "The map." And I can almost sense all of them turn to the boy as he says: "We had the Map for a good five years. We must have seen him on it several times and he must have made us forget it each time."
And this shocks me before I push my front paws over my eyes in utter disgust before I suddenly remember something that had been read in the last chapter and I look at my paw, remembering how my form had been described to have a missing toe and, as if by instinct, do I know exactly which toe it has to be.
I glare at the offending limb and then pull it to my muzzle in anger, nibbling at it with my sharpened teeth and elongated front teeth and while pain goes through my body as the limb slowly loses its connection to the rest of my body and while my vocal cords want to squeal in pain, do I just continue nibbling and biting.

And as the toe falls off and as blood starts pouring from my paw, do I then turn to the pillow, having no doubt that the scent of blood will be picked up by Lupin soon enough and I quickly scratch a message into the back of the pillow before putting the toe inside the now ruined pillow and using my tail to cover the message in my blood.
I then scurry away and when I am sure I have hidden myself in an alcove where Lupin can spot me, do I hurriedly transform back and take down the Disillusionment charm. And just when I do, do I get shocked as it's not Lupin who seems to smell the blood and pick up the pillow; it's the eldest Weasley who has scars on his face.
The elder young man turns the pillow around, yet seems to have trouble reading my message which makes me wonder if I really should have covered it in blood, but then I notice Lupin looking at me with a raised eyebrow and I decide to give him an indication of my guilt as I raise my wand and hiss a flaming charm – on my bleeding hand.

Lupin's POV

"He cut off his finger, but didn't hide himself afterwards like he did in the future? Why?" Goes through my mind even as I can almost clearly read the guilt that shows on the younger boy's face and while part of me fears that our attempt to keep Peter from going Dark has come too late, does Bill then say: "Hey, I can read it now."
And I quickly take the pillow from him, feeling a little stupid that he smelled the dripping blood before I did seeing as how he must be worrying his head off for his younger siblings and mother, but when I wipe away a little more blood and read the message in the fluffy little pillow, do my eyes widen at what I actually read

They still matter to me
Hints don't hide the truth from me.
Never forgive me.
I will never forgive myself
They were/are my family
My only family

This message shocks me and Ron asks: "Wait, he knows?" And I nod as I say: "He – he seems to. I – I can only imagine that he cut off his finger to punish himself and not to indicate that he is turning into the man/rat we knew him to be." And then Percy asks: "Won't his friends ask questions when they see his finger?"
And I sigh as I say: "Maybe, but we shouldn't answer for him. This will be a test that will prove who's side he really is on and, if this message is any indication – then Ron and Harry were right. The Peter that came with my younger-self is not the same as the Peter from four years from now. This Peter is still a Marauder."
And the Weasleys nod, even though the twins seem to have a bit of difficulty believing this and I turn to them as I say: "He'll be punished enough, boys. If he really is the same Peter as the one I remember – from before graduation and war – he will be punished plenty enough whenever we hear about his future self and his actions from then."
The two nod and Arthur says: "Lupin is right. We should just focus on healing from the spells Future Pettigrew –." But then I look at Peter again and say: "Scabbers." Everyone looks at me and I say: "We should start considering them two different people. Peter is Peter and that man – is Scabbers." And another nod is my answer.

Amyna's POV

"Is the kingdom really safe in her hands? Will Jaurion really be happy with her? Or would that bond have only worked had we not all come here? Has Merden taking her here and answering his future self's calling changed the future in such a way that my beloved son won't end up with the girl he has been vying for all these years?"
Goes through my mind as I gently lead the girl over to a windowsill alcove that has black framing and thus is covered in Silencing and Privacy charms covering it and when we are both seated comfortably, do I decide to just make sure the girl feels comfortable before we get into the heavy stuff and so I caringly ask her:
"Tell me, dear – can I call you dear? Tell me, what do you think of Ariador so far?" And the girl sighs as she says: "It's – it's gorgeous, Your Grace, it really is. I – I just wonder what – what it will come to look like when – when –." And I smile at her as I ask: "When Jaurion takes the crown?" The girl nods and I reach into my robe.

"Take a look at this." I then tell her and when she looks at the picture do her eyes widen as it's of a huge room filled with sculptures, statues, paintings and portraits as well as busts that have all kinds of jewelry hanging off of them. "Where – where did this come from?" The girl asks shocked and I smile proudly as I say:
"Jaurion made them." The girl looks at me shocked as I say: "He has always been brilliant that way. It's why he loves Transfigurations so much. He calls it the magical way of making something beautiful. I will admit, it's also the reason he hates Dark Arts so much. He calls that the art of making things ugly and horrible."
The girl looks thoughtful and I say: "Lindilwen dear, I – I can see that you don't like the kind of person Jaurion shows to the world. But let me ask you something? What do you remember of him back in his first year?" And the girl seems to think hard before she sighs and says: "He was nothing like he is now."

At this I nod and say: "No. No, he wasn't. And trust me, the bond between me and Minerva has never been all that great thanks to how she often complained about Jaurion's behavior whenever she asked us to come over. And yesterday we found out why he behaved like that and when I told Hendros last night, do you know what he said?"
The girl shakes her head and I smile at her as I say: "I knew it." This shocks the girl and I nod at her as I say: "I'm a Slytherin and he's a Gryffindor and he was the one who knew that our son was acting and wearing a mask. You can imagine how silly I felt when I realized that last night before bed. And speaking of last night –."

Here the girl sighs and I look at her caringly as I say: "Hari lost you before he had any conscious memory developed, yet he also lost people who meant just as much to him as you do. So tell me, what is it about him that makes you so opposed to accepting the role he wants to give you?" And the girl sighs before she whispers:
"His father." At this I smile and I say: "I understand." And the girl looks up, her eyes asking me if I really do and I send her a warm smile back as I say: "Yes, I really do. You've only known Jaurion the actor for most of your life. I have known the real Jaurion for much longer. Therefore, it's easier for me than for you to accept the truth.
The truth that the Jaurion you have known all these years isn't the Jaurion I raised and loved. And because, even as an Elf, Hari looks so much like his father, you have the urge to believe that the act Jaurion is holding up is the same as the one Hari is. Or perhaps – that the caring, loving, gentle boy you see is the actual act."

Here the girl looks down with tears of guilt shining between her eyelids and she whispers: "It's – it's – it's just – so hard." I nod and say: "Yes. Yes, it is. Knowing one thing for years and then suddenly seeing something completely different. That is never easy." And the girl sighs before she asks: "What should I do?"
Yet while it pains me, as I know how long Jaurion has actually loved the girl, do I sigh as I say: "Give it time. The same time you gave yourself when you started getting used to being a Muggleborn after living in the Muggle world your whole life. And – if that doesn't work – listen to what Snuffles told Jaurion last chapter."
The girl looks up and I reach out to lie a hand on her folded pair before I say: "You're an amazing person, Lindilwen, and I can easily see why Jaurion has had you in his heart this whole time. But if time and patience don't work out, then maybe Snuffles was right. Maybe some forms of history are best off being changed."
The girl looks shocked and while I have no doubt that I might partake in an act that will break my son's heart, do I use the broken look on my grandson's face to motivate me as I say: "It may be Hari's past, Lindilwen, but that no longer exists and now, you need to start thinking of your future." And with that I stand up and move away.

And that is that.
Okay, that chapter was WAY harder than I expected, yet I also like what I wrote. Like I mentioned several chapters ago, it was never really explained why Peter decided to switch sides and why he decided to throw away all those years of friendship, so I decided to lessen the number of years he was a spy and lessen the pain.
However, it wasn't so much the Peter part of this chapter that hurt. It was the Amyna and Lindilwen part. I really don't like breaking up Lindilwen and Jaurion, but on the other hand I really want Lindilwen to become a character all of her own and for that, this chapter was incredibly necessary, regardless of the difficulty.
Okay, that was that,

Venquine1990