Jon noticed another spot of blood behind Arya's left ear, gods, they'd already tried to clean her face three times, but every time she turned her head he saw more blood. "You need a bath." He muttered, he trailed his fingertips through the water of the black pool, trying to make the action seem as casual as possible, then touched her face gently, he tried to remove the spot of blood without drawing attention to it, but it would not budge. "Maybe we should just throw you in?" He asked with a half-hearted smirk.
Arya didn't react to the comment as she usually would, she wasn't cheeky or playful, she didn't threaten to pull him in with her or say she'd jump in if he jumped first, she simply shrugged and continued to clean her sword… the sword was already clean. He shared a concerned look with Robb over Arya's head. His little sister had taken a life, gods… He knew she wasn't really his sister, she was his cousin, but over the last few weeks he had discovered that learning the truth of his parentage hadn't changed much, he had been raised as a brother to her and she would always be his sister. That was a stunning revelation. Robb, Bran, and even Theon, would always be his brothers… Ned Stark would always be his father… even if he was still hurt by the deception, he was starting to understand the reasons why. He could still remember the precise moment when Robert had looked straight at him and offered to make him a Kingsguard, still feel the air sucked out of his lungs in that heartbeat before Father had moved himself between them.
"No." Lord Stark pushed himself to his feet and quickly moved himself between Jon and the King. "Jon will have Moat Cailin, when he is ready for it. He will marry, and have heirs of his own."
Jon took a shuddering breath, given who he was, what he was, did he have the right to marry? What if the truth of him came out? What if his children, or his children's children, were used to justify a war? Maybe he should just take the Black? Serve at the Wall like Uncle Benjen? Moat Cailin should be for Bran… if he lived. No, Jon couldn't think like that. Bran would live, Bran HAD to live! Jon turned his thoughts back to King Robert. He couldn't believe that the King could be so cold to Joffrey, especially when only minutes earlier Joffrey had been believed to be Robert's son and heir. Jon hadn't liked Joffrey, but he still felt sympathy for him, King Robert had been cruel. Jon worried what would happen to Myrcella and Tommen now? They were innocents, but the King seemed unpredictable in rage… no wonder Father had never dared tell him the truth. Jon had only known true fear a few times, but he was afraid of King Robert, in the quiet under the Weirwood he could admit that.
Arya finally stopped running the cloth over her blade and put it way, she leant into Jon and he put his arm around her, dropping a gentle kiss on her forehead. "You did well," He whispered. "Jonquil Darke couldn't have done better." Jonquil Darke had been appointed the female protector of Queen Alysanne Targaryen almost 250 years earlier, and had been part of the group that had visited Winterfell. There were very few writings about her in the Winterfell library, but Jon knew Arya had read each of them many times. Jon could have compared Arya to warrior queens, such as Nymeria or Visenya, but given that she had blooded her blade protecting a King the comparison to Jonquil seemed more apt.
"I don't like him." Arya whispered softly. Jon frowned and blinked in confusion at the sudden words.
Robb, also clearly confused, touched Arya's shoulder gently. A brief, but reassuring action, before voicing the question on the tip of Jon's tongue. "Don't like who?" His voice was soft, almost a whisper, almost as if he feared the answer.
Arya chewed her lower lip and frowned, she was quite for a long moment, her gaze on the black pool in front of them. "The King." She finally whispered. "I don't like him. I mean… I didn't exactly like Joffrey… but… how could he..?"
"Arya, you shouldn't say that." Robb hissed fearfully. "Don't ever say that, least it be mistaken as treason."
Jon however was not so quick to hush Arya. He shook his head, frowning at Robb over Arya's head. "She has a point though, doesn't she? How could King Robert be so cruel to somebody that minutes earlier he had believed was his blood?" Jon challenged.
Arya nodded. "Yeah, how could he… do that?"
Robb let out a heavy sigh. "Arya… Jon… I don't know. I don't know, but it's not safe to say that. Arya, please promise me you will never say that again."
Arya pushed herself to her feet, anger in her flinty grey eyes as she looked down at Robb. Nymeria and Lady moved with her, Nymeria faster than Lady, and Ghost picked up his ears from where he was laying under the Weirwood. "Why shouldn't I say that?!"Arya yelled. "I'm not a liar! Don't tell me not to speak the truth!"
"What if the truth could get you killed." Jon asked, he reached out a comforting hand and ran it through Nymeria's fur. "What if the truth could get Father killed? Or Robb? Or me? Sometimes there is honour in a lie."
Arya turned on him with all of the snarling venom that he had moments earlier aimed at Robb. "When?!"
"When you are protecting somebody you love." Robb answered. "If the truth would get you killed and lying would save you, I would lie, so would Father, so would Jon."
"No! Father would never lie!" Arya argued.
Jon shook his head sadly. "He already has. He doesn't like it, but he's lied. Not often, and only for good cause. He can likely count all the lies he's ever told on one hand, but Eddard Stark has told a lie or two."
"When did he lie?" Arya demanded.
Jon gave her a bitter smile. "When he told Sansa I wasn't the reason your mother left." He replied sadly. He looked down at his hands, a tear rolling down his cheek. "I'm the reason you never had a mother, I'm the reason you don't have a sister, I'm the one that should have been sent away, not Sansa."
Arya flung her arms around him, climbing into his lap. "Don't say that, don't ever say that!" She peppered his cheek with kisses but that only caused more tears to flow.
Jon hugged her fiercely, burying his teary face in her shoulder. "But it's the truth." He whispered. "I'm not a liar, why shouldn't I say it? It's true." He knew he was turning her earlier words against her, and that he should feel guilty about it, but he didn't. He needed to protect her, needed her to understand, had to drive the message home. "You know it's true. If I wasn't here then your sister and mother would be, your mother might still be alive."
Arya was quiet for a while, she hugged him tightly, rubbing his back. When she did speak again her voice seemed very small. "Maybe it is true, but it doesn't need to be said… maybe not all truths need to be said?"
Jon pulled back and looked at her, studying her face carefully. "Is omitting a truth the same as telling a lie?" He questioned. It was an interesting question, one that he had been asking himself for weeks now, had Eddard Stark actually lied? Had he ever outright called Jon his son? Arya frowned at the question, her expression changing from confusion, to conflict, then finally resolution as she puzzled her way to an answer. Gods, she was only eleven, that was a complicated question to ask an eleven year old. "Is not speaking a truth the same as speaking a lie?" Jon pushed.
"No." Arya finally answered. "No, it's not the same."
"What if not speaking that truth leads to people believing a lie not spoken?" Jon pushed. "What if not saying that you don't like the King leads to people believing you do like the King?"
Arya frowned again. "I…?"
"It's not the same." Robb reassured. "People believe stupid things all the time, not your job to correct them."
"People are stupid." Arya agreed.
"Sansa is stupid." Robb muttered. "Stupid and stuck in Essos, trapped in Khal Drogo's Khalasar."
At the mention of Khal Drogo's name Arya's hands became completely still. She looked up at Robb with her soft grey eyes, opened her mouth as if to speak, then closed it again without a word. With careful hands she pushed herself to her feet, her grey eyes hardening in resolve, their changing colour seeming to suddenly become that of fresh forged steel. "Khal Drogo." She whispered. "Khal Drogo will claim the silver haired moon daughter, and their legacy will be the stallion that mounts the world. I… there is more to it, Jeshi knows the full prophecy. We need to talk to Jeshi and Zhowi… we need to stop the Stallion from being born!"
"Arya, you're not making sense." Robb protested, but Arya was already making her way back to the Keep, all Robb or Jon could do was follow.
~~/~~
When Arya found Jeshi she started to talk in rapid Dothraki, too quick for Jon to understand all of it, Arya had spent more time with the Dothraki than most, and had picked up the language more easily than he had. Jon made out some words, he was surprised when Arya address Jeshi as Khalakki, Princess, he heard the words Dosh Khaleen and Vas Dothrak… and something about a prophecy… then Zhowi, who was seldom far from Jeshi's side, was there and they were looking for Father… Uncle… Father.
Eddard Stark was with Bran, Maester Luwin and Old Nan were there as well, all looked serious and sad, and suddenly Arya's sense of urgency was derailed. Maester Luwin said that Bran would never walk again… that the next few days would tell them more. Arya nodded and offered to sit with him for a while, and told Father that he needed to talk with Jeshi about Khal Drogo.
Jon offered to stay as well and Jeshi, Zhowi and Robb left with Father and Maester Luwin to discuss the matter. Bran's direwolf, still unnamed, climbed onto the bed after they had left, and Lady climbed up beside him. Nymeria and Ghost took up places on Bran's other side. Jon and Arya pulled the two large chairs from beside the fireplace and placed them near the bed. They sat in silence for hours and eventually Jon drifted off to sleep.
It was dark outside when Mya's hand on Jon's arm gently woke him. A blanket had been placed over Arya and she was softly snoring in the chair beside him.
"Shh, don't wake her." Mya whispered. "You've missed lunch and supper, I brought some food."
He gave her a sad smile, at once thankful for her kindness and devastated by it. Would she still treat him with the same kindness if she knew the truth? How could he tell her that they were third cousins? How could he tell her that his father had run off with her father's betrothed… that her father had killed his father and stolen his crown? He couldn't. 'Rhaegar may have sired me, but Eddard Stark is my father.' He told himself. 'My mother may have given me a different name, but I am Jon Snow of Winterfell.'
He took the offered food and signalled to the doorway, she nodded and they moved into the hallway, Ghost folling quietly behind. They sat on the ground, near Bran's door and talked quietly.
"How is she?" Mya asked.
Jon shrugged. "She took a life today, how should she be?"
Mya gave him a sad smile. "You took a life too."
Jon nodded. "But I'm not eleven, besides, I was protecting my sister."
"And she was protecting her King." Mya replied. "But it doesn't matter, we will have war now, Tywin Lannister will never believe any version of events that isn't to his liking. Lord Stark will have to go to King's Landing now, as will I."
Jon shook his head. "No, if he goes anywhere he will go to Essos, to get Sansa… but he can't leave Bran, not now."
Mya looked down at her hands. "The King has ordered it." She whispered quietly. "He is giving Lord Stark two weeks for Bran to recover, then we must go to King's Landing with him, Lady Arya as well. Jory, Zhowi and a handful of others are going to Essos. They are going to try and sneak into Vas Dothrak with a trading caravan and steal Sansa back…"
"I should go with them." Jon muttered. 'Maybe I can talk some sense into Viserys? Maybe if I tell him he's my uncle…?' He thought. "I need to..."
He started to stand but Mya caught his arm. "Eat first," She said quietly. "Empty stomachs lead to poor decision making."
He raised an eyebrow at that. "Dothraki proverb?"
Mya shook her head. "Andal actually, it was one of Lord Arryn's sayings, part of his argument that ensuring the poor have enough food is important."
Jon nodded and took a few reluctant bites of food, he soon realised that he was hungry and ate some more, before he knew it the plate was empty. Mya took the plate from him and gave him a gentle smile. "Lord Stark should be in his solar, I'll stay with Lord Bran and Lady Arya." She touched his shoulder gently, then stole into the room, closing the door softly behind her.
~~/~~
Mya had been correct, Eddard Stark was in his solar, but so were the King, Ser Barristan Selmy, Jonothor Darry, Maester Luwin, Robb, Theon, Jory, Jeshi, and Zhowi.
"Jon." Eddard greeted softly.
"Lord Stark, Your Grace" Jon replied formally, giving a bow towards King Robert. Prehaps the formality wasn't required, but he needed them to understand that he was serious. "I have a request to make." All eyes turned to him and he was given the nod to continue, it took every ounce of courage not to shrink from King Robert's gaze, those blue eyes seemed almost to be boarding into Jon. 'You can only be brave when you are afraid.' Jon reminded himself. He focused all of his attention on the man that until recently he had believed to be his father and forced himself to speak in a calm clear voice. "I wish to go to Essos, to help retrieve Lady Sansa."
Lord Stark's refusal was immediate, his expression careful and guarded. "No, Robb needs you here. I am to go to Kings Landing to take up the role of Hand of the King."
Jon rallied himself to push the matter. "With all due respect, Lord Stark, Lord Robb does not need me. Lady Sansa needs me, I beseech you, let me do this in your name… in the name of the North… let none doubt where my loyalties lie."
"Jon…" The older man took a step closer and placed a hand on Jon's shoulder. "You are my blood, nobody doubts you."
"Then let me help my blood, let me talk with my blood and see if this can be resolved peacefully. You already have a war coming, you do not need another."
There was a flicker of understanding in Eddard Starks eyes, Jon was sure that his double meaning had been understood. Jon scanned the room and found that Ser Barristan was looking at him intently.
Ser Barristan cleared his throat, a tactical move to gain attention before he started speaking. "Viserys knew me when he was a boy… perhaps, if the King permitted, my presence might help."
King Robert nodded. "Let the lad go, he has proven capable, if you allow Jon to go I will give you Ser Barristan as well, and Ser Jonothor."
Eddard looked from the King to the two knights then back to Jon, his stony grey eyes showing nothing of what was going on behind them. The silence drew out and Jon suddenly realised that he was holding his breath, waiting anxiously for an answer, any answer. Finally Eddard gave a short sharp nod and Jon was able to expel the breath that he had been holding. "You will leave within the hour, there will be no goodbyes. You will carry no sigils, and nothing that speaks of where your loyalties lie. You will travel in secret… you will go via Moat Cailin and collect Howland Reed, you will not kill anybody unless it is absolutely necessary. You will arrange your own passage, and likely have to work for it, I will give you what money I can, but use it sparingly, you will need it for the escape. If anybody doesn't like these rules… don't go."
"I would ask one goodbye, to Arya." Jon said quietly.
"The lad's got spirit, I'll give him that." King Robert muttered.
"Wolf-blooded."Eddard muttered. "But less so that Arya, I'll permit it." He returned his attention to Jon. "Robb will bring her to you, be quiet about it and pack light."
Less than an hour later Jon was riding south towards Moat Cailin, Ghost at his side, Father had argued that decision, but Jory and Ser Barristan had both backed him. Ser Barristan kept giving him strange looks and Ser Jonothor would not meet his gaze, but he would have to worry about that some other time. They bypassed Castle Cerwyn, a detour, but the less people that knew where they were going the better. They rode all night and partway through the morning before stopping, they slept for a few hours under some bushes near the side of the road, then set off on again just after midday.
~~/~~