Chapter Eleven

May, 2020

Something is going to happen.

She can feel it like a shiver in her bones the moment she steps off the train. There was no nightmare last night. For the first time in three years, she had woken up on May 2nd as if it were any other day. In the sleepy lull of the train ride, she had almost forgotten.

Three years ago I woke up in this world…

The air shivers through her, so different from the sunlit spring morning she left behind. The salty wind sweeps her hair across her face. Her first glimpse of the sea is blurred through a film of dark strands. Like a curtain [EJ1] tumbling down. Her heart squeezes in her chest.

Something is going to happen today…

Gentle fingers tuck her hair away. Sayuri's green eyes are bright despite the dark sky. The wind's chased a flush into her ivory skin, her golden hair fluttering around her. She's unnaturally vivid against the overcast horizon. Her fingers are warm on Michi's cheek.

Michi shivers. "I'm fine," she says, shaking her hair away. "Still just waking up."

"It was a long ride," Sayuri agrees, covering a yawn. "I'm glad we could all sleep on the way."

"Where did the boys go?" Michi asks, looking around. The train station opens up on an empty street. Tourist shops line the other side. The beach stretches along their side of the pavement, the sand shadowed beneath the spreading clouds. The sea is a restless dark grey, reflecting the stormy skies.

"They went across the street. Nagisa said it's a tradition to eat cup ramen on the beach." Sayuri sounds vaguely dubious of Nagisa's traditions.

Michi blinks; she has no memory of this. "Why didn't you go with them?"

"I wasn't going to just abandon you," Sayuri says, offended.

"We could have both gone," Michi says mildly, eying the cozy-looking convenience store. The wind is trying to shove her hair into her mouth again.

Sayuri shrugs. "I wanted to see the sea."

Michi looks at the sea. The dirty grey expanse of salt water is dangerously calm. Lightning flashes ominously in the distance. She feels like she's waiting for a horror movie to start.

"Isn't it pretty?" Sayuri asks blissfully.

"Mmm," Michi says.

"I haven't seen the sea since I was little. My grandmother took my brothers and I to Osaka once. I don't remember much, but the sea was always so pretty, even in the winter. I didn't know grey could be so beautiful."

"Mmm," Michi says. Sayuri has that distant, pensive look on her face that means her fingers are itching to reach for her brush and an empty canvas. "It was so beautiful," she repeats. "I'd forgotten."

"How old were you?" Michi asks curiously.

"Four. I don't remember much. Kaname doesn't either. Yukio does, but he doesn't talk about it. Dad told him he had to take care of us while he was gone." Sayuri doesn't take her eyes off the sea. Thunder rumbles softly in the distance. "He didn't want us there for the funeral. That's why Grandmother took us to Osaka. But I only really remember the sea. And Yukio."

Michi doesn't say anything. She doesn't know what to say. She knows that Sayuri and Kaname's mom died when they were little. Sayuri had told her once, casually, when she asked about it. Kaname had never spoken of it at all, and Michi never brought the topic up again.

She reaches down and impulsively slips her fingers through Sayuri's. Sayuri smiles faintly and squeezes her hand. "I'm glad I could come back," she says. "With you."

"Yeah." Michi thrusts her free hand into her jacket pocket. Her fingers are getting cold. "I'm glad my first time seeing the ocean is with you." She squeezes Sayuri's hand. "It's even the same color."

"Yeah." Sayuri smiles. "It really is a beautiful color."

"Mm." Michi spits out a strand of hair. Sayuri giggles, and the pensive mood is gone. With a start, Michi realizes that Sayuri's fingers are freezing in hers. She rubs them vigorously. "Aren't you cold? Didn't you bring gloves?" she demands.

"They're in Kaname's pocket," Sayuri says guiltily. Michi sighs. "Here, stick your hands in my pockets. You have the survival instincts of a Christian martyr, you know that?"

"You say that like it's a bad thing." Sayuri pouts.

"You're not allowed to freeze to death on my first ever vacation. Come on, let's go join the guys. It'll be warmer inside the store."

Sayuri obediently unhooks her hands from Michi's pockets. Michi unwraps her scarf. "You can have this, too. At least until you warm up," she says firmly, tucking it around Sayuri's flushed face.

"Aren't you cold?" Sayuri protests, her voice muffled in the scarf.

"No," Michi lies. "I've got my jacket. You should have worn something warmer than a jean jacket, baka."

"It wasn't cold back in Yukigaoka."

A sudden gust of wind flings Michi's hair across her face as she opens her mouth to reply. She sputters. Sayuri blinks up at her over the oversized red scarf. "Are you sure-" she starts, pulling the scarf down from her face. A voice interrupts her. "Hey, you!"

Sayuri glances over her shoulder. Michi is already moving in front of her. "Excuse us," she says, surprised to hear her voice come out steadily.

"I'm not talking to you," the stranger says rudely. He's bigger even than Kaname, towering over her, his hands shoved into his jacket pockets, his face half-hidden beneath his cap. His two buddies flank him, grinning and nudging each other as they leer at Sayuri. "I'm talking to the pretty one. Hey, gorgeous, wanna come hang out with us? We've got beer 'n stuff."

"You know them?" Sayuri whispers.

"No," Michi mutters back. The situation seems to dawn on Sayuri. She lifts her chin. "No, thank you," she says coolly. "Come on, Michi."

"Whoa, hold up!" the leader moves to block their way. "Look, you can bring your friend too, okay?"

Sayuri tilts her head, her green eyes like shards of colored glass. "I said no thank you."

"Come on, don't be like that." The leader takes off his cap. He's handsome, in a vaguely bad-boy kind of way, with messy brown hair and jet-black eyes. His smile is quick and boyishly charming, but the way he steps closer to Sayuri makes Michi's skin prickle. She looks around frantically. The street is empty. The distant sound of thunder is growing louder.

"Come here." The boy reaches for Sayuri. Michi moves without thinking. "Leave us alone," she says sharply, knocking his hand aside. The boy's charming smile vanishes. "Stay out of it, bitch."

Sayuri's fist bounces harmlessly off his arm. The boy gapes at her for a moment. One of his buddies laughs. "She's feisty, Iwatani!"

Michi grabs Sayuri's arm as the other girl pulls back for round two. "Let's go!"

Iwatani grabs her arm. "Geez, what's your fricking problem? Too good to stay and talk to us?" He yanks. She stumbles, trips over her own feet, and goes sprawling in the sand. Raucous laughter pounds in her ears. Her mind goes blank.

"Stop!" Sayuri's voice rises. Michi scrambles to her feet. Sayuri flings out an arm before she can move. Her eyes blaze, but her voice is steel-calm. "Michi, go get Kaname."

"Ooh, you've got competition, Iwatani!" one of the boys crows. The other guy grabs Michi's arm as she hesitates. "Aw, leaving already?" he jeers.

Michi's heart thumps in her chest. The boy sees her glance across the street and tightens his grip on her arm. "Hey," he says, giving her a little shake, "who's Kaname? The boyfriend?"

"Let go of Michi!" Sayuri's voice breaks for the first time. Iwatani laughs. "That's her name? Like the slutty maid?"

"What?"

"You know, that myth about the princess!"

"What the hell, Iwatani! Who knows that crap?"

"Shut up, Sato."

The boy holding Michi laughs. He's shorter than the others, his orange hoodie pulled low over his face against the wind. "You're such a nerd, Iwatani."

"Still better-looking than you," Iwatani retorts. "Hey, Hotaru, check it out. Sato's got the slutty maid."

The other boy guffaws. Michi yanks at the boy's grip. "Let me go!"

Sayuri's voice cuts across the wind. "My brother and his friends are coming to find us," she says. "We don't want to start a fight. Let us go."

"She's lying," Sato laughs. He shakes Michi again. "Hey, maid, is she lying?"

Michi clamps her mouth shut and glares up at him. He guffaws. "This one's feisty, too. Geez, what a bunch of bitches. We're just teasing you." He shoves Michi back. She retreats to Sayuri's side, panting. She can't catch her breath. Her heart is jackhammering against her ribs. She's dimly aware of Sayuri's voice rising, of raucous laughter, a hand reaching for her –

A hand grips her shoulder, warm and oddly familiar. Her vision clears. She looks up into Kaname's steady green eyes.

"Frick, it's the boyfriend!"

"Dude, chill. We were just messing around. Hey, you–"

Kaname ignores them. "Are you alright?" he asks. Sayuri is bristling. "They hurt Michi!"

I'm okay, Michi tries to say, but it comes out as a gasp. She doubles over, trying to catch her breath.

"Nagisa," Kaname says quietly. Nagisa's face pops into Michi's blurred field of vision. He isn't smiling. "Hey, Michi-chan, just sit down and breathe, okay? Deep breaths."

"Kaname –"

"Stay here, Sayuri."

"We were just messing around. What, you gonna fight all of us?"

There's a dull thunk. Nagisa kneels down in front of Michi. "Look at me, okay? Breathe. Everything's fine."

"Kana–" she wheezes.

"Kaname'll be fine," Nagisa says reassuringly. "He's never lost a fight. C'mon, breathe with me. Deep breath in."

She breathes obediently. The roaring in her ears subsides. Nagisa squeezes her shoulders gently. "You've got asthma, doncha, Michi-chan? It's okay. Just breathe out for me. And again. There we go."

Michi takes a shuddering breath. "It's never been this bad before," she gasps, and coughs. Nagisa pats her back. "I know. It happens. You were probably scared and panicky. Deep breath in?"

"Are you okay?" Sayuri's remorseful blue eyes appear besides Nagisa's. Michi manages a smile. "Yeah. Sorry. You good?"

She nods. "They're gone now. Kaname hit the one who shoved you."

"Is he okay?"

"I'm fine." Kaname squats down beside her, rubbing his knuckles. "How are you feeling, Michi?"

"I'm okay," she mumbles. Two more shadows appear on the sand next to her. Kaname straightens up again. "Don't crowd her. Let her breathe."

"Michi was really brave," Sayuri says.

Michi shakes her head. "I should've –" she coughs –"I should've gone and gotten them like you said. I'm sorry." Her eyes are stinging. She rubs them roughly. "I didn't want to leave you alone, I'm sorry –"

"Michi-chan, don't forget to breathe." Nagisa rubs her shoulders reassuringly. "C'mon, deep breath. There we go. And out again. Good."

"You were brave." Sayuri reaches out and grips her trembling hand. "I wouldn't have been able to stay calm if you hadn't been there."

You were the brave one, Michi wants to say, but she's scared she'll start crying if she opens her mouth. Her hands won't stop shaking. She's never felt like this before. Like she can't even control her own body.

Nagisa rubs her shoulders again. "Let's get you somewhere warm, okay?"

"I'll call a taxi," Kaname says. "Jirou, can you give them directions?"

"Yeah, here, I'll call."

A jacket settles around Michi's shoulders. She looks up gratefully at Tatsuya. "I'm okay," she says breathlessly, and scrubs at her eyes with the heel of one hand. She squeezes Sayuri's hand. "Really. I'm okay now."

Her hands are still shaking. Sayuri doesn't let go. "That was scary," she says, and sniffles a little. "I'm glad you're okay."

"Hey," Michi says, alarmed as a tear rolls down Sayuri's cheek. "I'm fine, really. We're fine. We're okay. You don't need to cry."

Nagisa wraps an arm around Sayuri's shoulders as she sniffles again. "It's okay. You guys were in a really scary situation. It's okay to be scared," he says soothingly. "You too, Michi-chan."

"It wasn't that scary," Michi mumbles, rubbing her eyes again. Sayuri gives a strangled laugh. "This isn't how I imagined vacation."

"Vacation hasn't started yet," Michi says stubbornly. "Not like this."

"Mm." Sayuri fishes in her pocket for a tissue. Tatsuya nudges Michi's arm aside and rustles through the jacket pockets. He produces a handful of tissues. Sayuri blows her nose. "Thanks, Tatsuya."

"Are you alright?" he wants to know, his dark eyes concerned over the black mask. She nods and wipes her eyes on her sleeve. "I'm okay now. We were just unlucky, I think."

Nagisa hugs her closer. "We won't leave you guys alone for the rest of the trip," he promises. She sniffles. "No standing outside the bathroom while I shower."

"We'll make Jirou do that."

"Make me do what?" Jirou says suspiciously. He nudges Michi with his foot. "You guys okay?"

Michi turns her face away. "Yeah," she mumbles, trying to indiscreetly wipe her eyes on her jacket collar.

A chocolate bar is thrust before her. "I went back to the store while Kaname was calling a taxi," Jirou says brusquely. "I couldn't find dark chocolate, but it's trash anyway."

"Hey," Sayuri says, unwrapping hers. "Not true."

"Some of us have taste buds, Ichijo." Jirou's tone softens the tiniest bit. "The taxi should be here in a few minutes. Do you guys want to wait where it's warm?"

Sayuri shakes her head. "Cup ramen by the sea, right?" she says, and smiles at Nagisa. "It's a tradition."

He smiles back. "For good memories," he agrees. "Tatsuya's got the ramen. Although it might be a bit cold now," he adds, a little less enthusiastically.

"It'll still taste good." Sayuri gets to her feet and offers a hand to Michi. "Come on. We want a good memory for your first trip to the sea, right?"

"We don't have to," Michi protests. Sayuri lifts her chin. "I want to. It'll be fun. I want to remember this grey sea as a good memory."

Michi looks across the beach at the restless water. Her hands have finally stopped shaking, but her chest still hurts.

Was that it? She wonders. Is this why I felt uneasy before? Was it just the grey sea, and the storm, and a bad encounter? Was that all?

She shivers. No one notices. The others are crowding around Tatsuya, passing each other the foam cups and arguing over flavors. Sayuri is in the middle of the group, clutching her steaming ramen in both hands. The scarf is still wrapped around her chin, her hair tumbling around her flushed face. There are still tear tracks on her cheeks, but she's smiling, her head tucked against Nagisa's shoulder. Kaname stands protectively behind her, shielding her from the wind. Jirou and Tatsuya are fighting over the last chicken flavored ramen. Even in the cold and wind, they're bright against the grey and pale sand, a little too vivid, a little too perfect. The people walking past on the street are starting to stare.

And that's normal, she thinks. That's the way it's been for the past three years. Them, and the rest of this world.

And me, somewhere in between.

She shivers again. Something still feels wrong.

"Michi!" Sayuri calls. "Come eat!"

"She's posing by the water," Jirou laughs. "Quick, someone take a picture."

Michi makes a face at him and trots over. "Was not."

"Michi, here, I saved the beef ramen for you." Sayuri presses the steaming cup into Michi's hands and zips up the oversized jacket protectively. "Are you still cold? You can have your scarf back."

Michi shakes her head. "Keep it." Tatsuya's jacket smells like the promise of snow. She buries her nose in the upturned collar gratefully. Sayuri slips a slender arm around her waist. "I'm really glad you're okay," she murmurs, her voice muffled in the jacket. Michi hugs her back. "You too. You sure you're alright?"

"Yeah."

"Those guys were jerks. Especially the one who grabbed you."

"It's alright." Sayuri smiles serenely. "Kaname broke his nose."

"Oh." Michi reflects for a moment. "Good."

Light flashes in their faces. Michi blinks, bemused, as Nagisa beams at them and raises his phone again. "Say cheese!"

"Wait–" Michi starts, conscious of her tear-blotched face. Sayuri just laughs and whirls her around to face the sea.

Light flashes. Nagisa props his phone on the ground and runs to join them. "Group photo! Come on, guys!"

Michi closes her eyes as a gust of wind thrusts her hair away from her face. Sea spray stings her cheeks. She tastes the salt on her lips. Tatsuya's arm slips around her shoulders. Kaname is steadying Sayuri as wobbles, giggling, under Nagisa's weight as he flings an arm around her and Michi. "Make room for Jirou!" he cries, and Michi squeaks as her feet are suddenly swept off the sand. Sayuri laughs and wrap an arm around Kaname's shoulders.

Light flashes, framing them against the stormy sky: Kaname, Jirou, and Tatsuya, dark silhouettes against the lightning-sprayed sky, the two girls dangling between them, their hair tossed back, Nagisa in the middle, twisting to pose for the camera.

Michi takes a sharp breath.

This is real.

A/N

I am very determined to finish this story. And then who knows? Maybe even go back and finish some of the others.