Discipline

Getting back to the village had been...interesting.

And by interesting Sesshoumaru meant infuriatingly stressful and inconvenient. They'd decided to go against their word and take the oni sorceress with them, keeping her bound via one of his energy whips wrapped around her torso, binding thin arms. The difficult part lay in flying back to the village to figure out other options of rescue for the miko.

Sesshoumaru had been quite determined to return on his own but without the use of his eyes or nose the typically ordinary task became incredibly difficult. He'd flown up out of the rocky terrain seeking to leave it, only to bump into half a dozen trees and cliff faces.

Inuyasha had, after loudly laughing about the whole thing, offered to carry him. Sesshoumaru responded by aiming a swipe of his claws at the whelp, who had dodged with irritating laughter. After the initial mirth had worn off though, Inuyasha seemed to register the predicament they were in.

"You could hold onto my sleeve and drag the demon behind us with your whip thingy while I lead the way."

Sesshoumaru had scoffed, holding his head up high even as tears continued to mar his cheeks. He was beginning to feel a tad dehydrated. The image of him holding onto his little brother's trailing sleeve like a pup came to mind, but he shook it away. Ridiculous. His pride wouldn't allow it.

"Well do ya have any other ideas?"

He had answered that question by summoning clouds of energy to their feet. Inuyasha had yelped, and Sesshoumaru felt it a pity that he were near blind with the tears. He was quite certain his brother had nearly fallen off. With their squirming prisoner in tow, he'd raised them into the air. Inuyasha acted as his eyes, telling him which way to 'steer' the clouds.

"Left!"

Sesshoumaru swiftly turned them in the desired direction. Inuyasha yelped and snarled, "what the fuck!"

"You said left."

"I meant a little bit left! Not so far left that we turn West!"

"You'll find we're heading South East, foolish whelp."

"You know what I meant, ya bastard!"

After finally reaching the human village of Edo, Sesshoumaru had lowered them onto the outskirts, turning away. "Take the Oni Sorceress with you back to the old miko's hut. This one will join you later."

"Huh? Where you goin'?" Inuyasha grumbled.

"To wash the scent of tears off this one before I vomit," Sesshoumaru growled, storming through the forest and using Bakusaiga's sheath to tap ahead of himself in order to avoid the blurry shapes of trees that seemed to be sharpening. He blinked, vision finally clearing.

Sesshoumaru wiped at his eyes, mercifully finding no more wretched tears. He sighed with relief, approaching a private looking waterfall that had overhanging trees around it. Once disrobed he waded into the bone-chillingly cold pool, plunging his head under the spray of the falls.

Miko...this one needs to save you in just a few short days.

The thought of seeing her again elicited the memory of her gentle, intoxicating scent, which he viciously squashed.

No, he wouldn't think about the miko. If he did, surely she'd know? She currently occupied his mind, quite literally. He briefly hoped her safe, not envying her position. There were many dark, complicated thoughts he'd harboured in the past, memories of demons and men committing atrocities, some of those brought about by his own hands. Such things were not meant to be seen by the kind, strong gaze of the miko.

And then there were other...more personal thoughts she would not appreciate.

The image of blue, sparking eyes sent a telltale shiver down his spine, stirring heat low in his gut.

Sesshoumaru lifted his face away from the cold, biting water, panting and glancing down. Humiliation gripped him tightly, an erection proof of the direction of his thoughts. Growling, the Daiyoukai stepped forward, attempting to purge himself anew of his desires. Yet, no amount of cold, crippling water would get rid of his affliction. The heavy water pelted his shoulders for a good few minutes.

This is the work of the miko. It was the only explanation. Was she currently occupying a part of him meant for lust and carnal pleasure?

Sesshoumaru squeezed fierce golden eyes shut, hand wrapping around his base and stroking his cock. She'd brought this upon herself.

Panting, he planted one hand on the rocks behind the falls, bowing his head and losing himself to sensations, fantasies. He could picture a hot-spring, or maybe a bath-house. Kagome, yes she was there. Wrapping her arms around him and willingly taking him inside her wet heat. Sesshoumaru's lips parted as he groaned, pumping himself harder and feeling solace in the roaring falls as it covered the sound of his movements.

He imagined the sight of his cock thrusting inside her slick folds, watching it drag and glide in a fast, hard rhythm. What noises she'd make. He swallowed and chocked on his own quiet moans at the thought, clamping his mouth onto his arm. Now he could envision taking her hard from behind, feeling her tight heat and the push of her hips while she begged and pleaded for more. He bucked into his hand, fangs sinking into his arm.

Sesshoumaru near lost himself entirely, eyes flashing red- just as his conjured fantasy shifted attention to a second Kagome, watching. This Kagome wasn't like the one he thrust into. Her eyes were wide, tempting mouth open mid-gawk. It hit him like the slam of an opponents fist deep into his stomach.

Sesshoumaru made a strangled noise in the back of his throat, cumming with a snarl. His eyes flew wide, panting wildly, only vaguely aware of his seed mingling with the water and the blazing pleasure in his abdomen.

That had been the real one. The real Kagome had witnessed the thoughts he'd tried to repress, over and over, and to no end.

Various emotions plagued him, running the Daiyoukai raw and tired. He did not like feeling so much at once. This was not like him. He needed to calm himself and focus on the dire situation of saving the miko, not pleasuring himself to her. He'd been weak lately but needed to start practising self-discipline again.

And once she obtained freedom, if she spoke of her disgust and unwillingness to see him again, that was fine. Sesshoumaru felt certain that once she denounced him, the wants and desires for her would finally be shut away for good.

Stepping back from the falls and sinking into the welcoming embrace of freezing waters, a niggling dissatisfaction echoed through his being. It went against an inuyoukai's nature to lie to one's self.

After pacing up and down the hedgerows for a while and letting the cool air work wonders on her livewire nerves, Kagome exhaled and clapped her hands to her cheeks. Get a grip, girl.

This was Inuyasha's brother she was getting flustered over. Her ex's brother. She needed to just head back to her room, get under the covers and go to sleep. No use in mulling over magenta stripes hooking low around a certain demon lord's hips, the deep guttural moans, the ripple of muscles and sweat gliding sensually down-

Kagome clapped her cheeks harder.

Storming over to the mansion and stepping up onto the porch, her hand paused a hair's breadth from the door to her room. Sloth still lay within. If she focused she could hear the faint sound of his breathing.

Pressing her thighs together, Kagome swallowed. Now wasn't a good time to sleep next to him. He'd already proven to be loose with his hands and a teasing little so and so. The sensible thing to do would be to leave and find another room. But...

Blunt teeth dragged over her plump bottom lip. Maybe the idea of his hands wandering wasn't such a bad one.

The miko wrestled with herself for a good few minutes, turning over the idea in her mind a few times. Her heel shifted, lingering, before dragging back along the surface of the floor, body turning away.

Kagome wrapped her arms around herself, sighing. It still wouldn't be fair to the real Sesshoumaru. Nothing had changed.

Her hair flew back from her face then, the shutters and doors slightly trembling from the onslaught of wind. Pushing the locks aside, Kagome blinked up at the sight of yet another inuyoukai gliding down towards the porch entrance from the higher bars of the cage. The great beast landed before her, paws touching down with a thud that shook the ground. With a ripple of heat and curling, choking energy, he transformed.

She stared, breath catching in her throat. He had visible scarring on the left side of his face and chin.

He bore a sturdy looking brown crest on white silks, some of his silver hair drawn back into a half ponytail, the rest of the strands fanning about his shoulders while he approached, wearing much grander armour than she was used to. Two mokomokos curled out from behind him, seeming to thin around his shoulder armour. Bakusaiga rested neatly at his hip. He turned and picked up a figure, which Kagome realised had been riding on his back.

"Innocence," she murmured, hurrying forward. She quickly held out her arms, accepting the boy's weight into them. He lay with his eyes closed, sleeping. Tucking his head under her chin, the mini Sesshoumaru grumbled quietly.

Kagome looked up at the Daiyoukai while the mokomokos lifted to reveal another behind them. He crouched to help Sadness get to his feet.

"Y-you're both here," she squeaked, heart pounding. "Are you alright!? I was worried sick!"

Sadness blinked at her, rubbing at his head a little awkwardly. He nodded, eyes gentling.

Exhaling in a rush, Kagome hugged Innocence tighter to her chest, blinking up at the unknown emotion with stinging eyes. "Thank you. Thank you so much for bringing them to me and helping them. I thought Repression might have locked them away."

The Sesshoumaru regarded her quietly with a blank expression. His left eye was discoloured, the iris and pupil a milky white, hinting at blindness. The scarring licking around his left side looked to have eaten slightly into the skin of his cheek. It didn't look like any burn she'd ever seen, the colouring a typical angry pink but the scarring in slight wisps around the edges. Realising her folly of staring, Kagome ducked her head with shame.

"It was not for you, nor for any one person that won my involvement. Merely, this one does not like the pup who goes by 'Repression', so I took it upon myself to act."

His voice sounded controlled, crisp and to the point. Looking up again, Kagome raised a brow. "I guess that's something we have in common then. May I know your name?"

He blinked, inclining his head slightly, and the magnitude of such a small act felt strange. Though she'd cuddled with a Sesshoumaru clone, kissed one, teased one, the air had never felt so charged and heavy. A very real, palpable aura of duty and quiet energy radiated off this emotion. He practically demanded others give him their respect and undivided attention, to yield. Her knees trembled slightly against the urge to bow, which felt ridiculous considering her history with the demon.

"This one has been known as many things throughout the years when times have changed. Skill, Training, Stability. I settled on Discipline myself."

"O-oh," a breath rushed out of her lungs. "Will you be sticking around, my Lord?"

Wait. Why had she just said that? She never called Sesshoumaru by such a formal title.

Discipline watched her intently, piercing gaze sliding over her face. "No," he finally uttered, resting a hand on the hilt of his sword seemingly out of habit. "This one has other matters to attend to. If you wish to call upon me, Happinesses land's lurk just below. He knows where to find me. Fantasy will get you out of the bird-cage, I am sure."

"Okay," Kagome stroked Innocence's short silver hair, fidgeting a little. She burned with questions, almost wanting to ask him to stay. But that would be rude. He'd already done more than enough. Sadness shifted closer to her side while Discipline turned on his heel, stalking a little distance away.

Glancing at Sadness, she opened her mouth to speak when that quiet, steel wrapped in velvet voice cut in.

"Miko."

"Y-yes?"

Discipline glanced over his shoulder, good eye trained upon her like a hawk. "You do not need to refer to this one by title. 'Sesshoumaru' is a name you have earned the right to say."

Blue eyes warmed and Kagome gave a genuine smile. "You can say my name too, you know. You have the right to say it," she lightly teased, shifting to support Innocence with one arm while taking Sadnesses hand in her own.

"Hn," observing her with a heavy look, he soon pushed off the ground, flying upwards. The mokomokos trailed out behind him to tangle in the air, his figure shrinking into the distance and disappearing into a white, glowing orb, speeding away.

Kagome glanced at Sadness and smiled, tugging him to follow. They walked up to the porch, hand in hand. "You look half dead. I'm guessing you exhausted yourself by doing too much at once?"

He nodded a little moodily, opening the door for her and sliding it back.

"I can understand that. You were cooped up so long so it's natural you'd go a little overboard with the freedom," Kagome stepped into the room, eyeing Sloth draped over the entirety of the bed.

She prodded him with her foot. "Hey!" She whisper hissed, trying not to disturb the boy in her arm.

Sloth made a grumbling noise, ignoring her.

Frowning, Kagome set Innocence down on what little free space there was on the futon, grabbing a foot. "Sadness," she called, nodding to the other.

He caught on, grabbing Sloth's other foot. They then tugged and pulled with all their might, making the demon slide off the bed slightly. The second they started to make progress, however, red mists blazed around him, and the ankle under Kagome's palm shifted and changed, fur replacing skin.

The inuyoukai sprawled on the bed, paws in the air. He let out a quiet snore, tongue lolling out of his mouth.

Groaning, they gave up.

Kagome settled down beside Innocence, leaving a sliver of room for Sadness to inch onto the futon. She shifted more of the comforter over him to make it fair, while Innocence snuggled up into the soft fur beside him.

The miko's hand stilled upon feeling Sadnesses muscles tense in a slight flinch. "Are you alright?" She asked quietly.

He stared at her with the same doleful eyes. Nodding slowly, his wary gaze shifted around the room like a skittish animal.

"No one's going to hurt you," a firmness crept into her tone. "Not while I'm around, anyway. I promise."

With a watchfulness that could only be born out of years of distrust and isolation, the Sesshoumaru clone stiffened and relaxed as she moved up against his side, resting her head on his arm. It struck her that she was now acting much like Sloth, some colour dusting her cheeks. "Am I making you uncomfortable?" When he shook his head, butterflies danced around her stomach. "That's good," she slid a hand over his striped wrist without really thinking about it. The pallor of his skin held traces of dirt and she surmised he probably needed a bath, but there was no force on earth that would drag her to the bathhouse right then.

"You know, it's funny...that I like you and Innocence," she murmured, smiling at him. Her heart ached at the surprise and disbelief that skittered over his expression. "Hey now, what's with the face? I'm serious. You two are my favourite of the Sesshoumaru emotions," she gave a firm nod, settling closer against him. "But I mean, I think it's because I value your emotions inside my own head. I try to hold on to what it felt like when I was younger because it helps me relate more to kids. If they're upset, I just put myself in their shoes."

It was with pleasant delight that she felt her hand be encased in a much larger one, his calloused palm swallowing her fingers. Deadly claws glided over the delicate skin of her wrist, the pads of his fingers soothing in their careful glides. Kagome looked up at him, resting her head on his shoulder.

Sadness observed her quietly, chapped lips parting. He gestured between them.

"Us?"

Frustration marred his brow and he motioned again, briefly touching himself, then her.

"Oh! The Sadness inside me?"

Something relaxed his features and he nodded.

"I didn't like it when I was 15," she admitted. "Went through a bunch of heartache and self-image stuff. Wasn't fun," Kagome forced a quiet giggle, eyes growing dim. "Not gonna act like I always reacted in a mature way. I hadn't felt that way before and the emotions just felt so big."

He gestured to himself, before widening the distance between his hands and motioning to Innocence.

Kagome's brow crinkled, "you were bigger...when...ah!" She smiled, "when Sesshoumaru was smaller?" That didn't sound quite right and he seemed to struggle with how to clarify, but it came to her. "Do you mean you were more powerful? Like you could be felt without being repressed?"

Tired, weathered gold shone, smiling for him. He nodded, and Kagome looked up at the ceiling, sobering.

"I tried to repress things for a little while too, but I'm not wired that way. It came out. Heh, you know, it's a sad thing...to realise you love someone while crying. Loving someone should be a happy thing, but life isn't always so neat and tidy. Anyway, I'm grateful to my Sadness, because she let me slow down and sort out my feelings. While crying, I could process what was going on and finally talk about it afterwards. Like the storm clouds had to block out the sun in order to feel it's light a little brighter afterwards."

That sounded very hippy-like. Maybe she'd just spewed a bunch of nonsense. Kagome turned her head to deflect, noting that Sadnesses face had shifted closer. She wasn't sure when that had happened.

She started when he sat up slightly, limp silver hair sliding loose from behind a pointed ear. His lips were a gentle, kind pressure against her forehead, palm ghosting her cheek to stroke into black hair.

A strange burst of catharsis bloomed through the miko and she squeezed her eyes shut against the wave of emotion. It was almost as though her own Sadness rose up to mingle with Sesshoumaru's, if only for a moment.

When he settled back down again to rest his head on the pillow, Kagome slid her palm over his chest. "Thank you."

Perhaps that hand shouldn't have strayed up his neck to cup a striped cheek. And maybe she shouldn't have melted into a pile of goo when he leaned heavily against her palm just like he had before, this time turning his head to kiss her fingers. Winter lashes slid shut in an act of trust, his hand coming up to hold her's against his face, radiating pure, unabashed peace for the first time since she'd met him.

Kagome's eyes widened, heart fluttering. Something clicked inside her, and maybe it was a dim click that she didn't quite hear or understand, but it had happened nonetheless. She leaned in and pressed her lips to his, stroking her thumb over a magenta stripe and feeling him inhale her scent.

When she pulled back, her cheeks were just a little red this time, but it hadn't been a kiss like the one shared with Lust. Rather, it was an act of acknowledgement, like the forehead kiss had been for her. He'd never been someone's favourite before, she knew what that felt like.

"It's alright," she soothed. "It's okay."

Sadness stared up at her, Sesshoumaru's features dazed with a dusty kind of awe. Kagome smiled and wrapped her arms around him, stroking his soft, brittle hair as the demon quietly trembled, ducking his face against her neck.

In the silence of the room, a paper-thin, croaking voice could be heard.

"...Thank...you...Kagome..."

Sesshoumaru stopped dead outside the old miko's hut, feeling a strange sensation. Long fingers curled into his palms, breath catching. The sensation of gentle hands smoothed over his brow, combing through his bangs.

"It's alright," a voice murmured in his mind. "It's okay."

Inuyasha's scent registered as his brother joined him outside, raising a brow. "The hell is happenin' now? Ya look strange."

Sesshoumaru had his response ready on the tip of his tongue, a stern dismissal that would assure his fool of a brother just how well he was, thank you. But instead what came out was something else entirely, a buried, forgotten memory he meant never to share.

"This one remembers you playing kemari ball."