As I said once before, I've had many tragedies. My body never even belonged to me and it denied me what I wanted. My heart, like Ran's, is broken. However, I had to do what was best for her, as having premonitionary abilities could drive her to madness. Of course, to Ran, it's betrayal and I cannot blame her for feeling that way, as she's gravitated to the child as well. I am just as sorrowful as she is as the choice itself brought back bitter memories of neverending tragedies.
To not have the child here with us felt like my body purging what I had desired and I ached all the same. I'm not bleeding, of course, however, I might as well be. I ached and my heart is shattered like a teacup. I knew this was for the best but knowing is most certainly different than feeling. I felt wrong in choosing to send her away and, like Ran, I hope she doesn't feel betrayed by it when she comes to understand it.
At least, she has the fortune of being a bit too young to comprehend what has happened, otherwise, she will have fought and screamed, screaming at how we betrayed her. Frankly, I may as well say I killed her, considering that living in seclusion will do something to her. Of course, the satori loves her just as much as we do, so surely, it won't destroy too much of anything but I fear that it will. She's still young enough, young enough not to internalize most things.
Reimu, please forgive us.