Kylo drove her home after their conversation. She needed space and he could give that to her because he understood. At least she wasn't running away, instead she was frozen. Neither of them knew what would happen now. this felt like forbidden fruit to her. He was everything she wanted but Rey struggled to accept that she could have him. Her breath fogged the glass of the car window as she closed her eyes, trying to imagine a life with him. Her grip on Kylo's hand tightened because she could see it. Breakfast every morning together, drinking wine and cuddling on the couch, and more. She could picture him at her graduation, at her senior concert, her musical travels and so desperately she wanted him to be there. For once she wanted someone to be there for her, to be proud of her and support her. And that person was sitting right next to her.
But could she do the same for him? All his fancy events where he showcased designer weapons, his news appearances and congressional speeches. Could she support his business? Now that she knew what happened behind closed doors, she understood why people call him a monster. If she didn't love him or know him personally, she would probably say the same thing. Rey was struggling where to draw her morals. He had offered to give it up for her, go back to his real name. He has said it so many times, I'll do anything for you, but she could have never expected giving up his career. Rey wanted Kylo to change it like he said, but she didn't want to be the reason why. What if they broke up? What if he regretted it? If it failed, it would fall on her.
The car slowly came to a stop and when Rey opened her eyes, she saw she was at her apartment. Because of everything that had happened she had missed a lot of work and was behind on rent. Kylo could sense her unease and he knew what it was about. At breakfast he saw her phone lite up with the notification saying rent past due by 3 days. He felt like it was his fault. Kylo fished out his wallet and pulled out the black card and slipped it into her hand. She stared at it wordlessly. Her independence was rearing its head, but she also knew by now he wasn't trying to buy her love or trick her. He honestly cared and he was doing what he could.
"Please. Take it and use it. I don't want it back." He studied her carefully. She hadn't said a word to him since they left his place. His shoulders relaxed as he watched her put it in his sweatpants she was wearing. His clothes made her look even smaller.
"So do I call you Ben or Kylo?" a large hand engulfed hers again. She loved holding his hand, it was her favorite thing next to the forehead kisses he gave her all the time.
"Call me whatever you want."
"Sugar pumpkin cutie pie." Her face lit up with a genuine smile and a light laugh. Kylo rolled his eyes and brought her hand to his lips kissing her knuckles.
"Not what I meant but fine."
Rey leaned over and planted a kiss on his check, over his scar. "I will talk to you later."
He nodded and let go of her hand. He watched her until she was behind the locked doors of the building before taking off. Without her he felt like something was missing. Afterall she was the one slowly gluing him back together.
xxx
Rey walked into her apartment and waved at her roommates in the kitchen. They were surprised to see her outside of her room, let alone coming back from being out all night.
"Hey, do you got rent?" one of them piped up from the counter. They were going to let it slide after all she had been through, but they were just as broke as she was and couldn't cover her.
Rey nodded and pulled out her phone and Kylo's card entering in the payment method. The roommates took note of the black card and one of them turned up her nose. Rey noticed and sighed. Her roommates were starting to not like her and now she was in debt to Kylo in more ways then one.
"One of your friends is here too, in your room."
"Thanks… I just sent the money." Rey quickly turned away from them and retreated to her room. It was probably Finn checking in on her, he was stopping by everyday at this point.
"Finn, you really don-" she stopped dead in her tracks as her door closed behind her and she took in the sight before her. "Who the fuck are you?"
Xxx
Kylo was just pulling into the parking garage when he got the notification that his card had been used. This made him happy knowing she wasn't going to make herself suffer when she didn't need to. For too long she was going at it alone, not anymore, not ever again if he could help it.
He spent the rest of the day making work calls from home. First order was to pull everyone of his employees out of the middle east. The company was going to change little by little. Not just for Rey but for his mother and for himself. This wasn't him anymore. Kylo called his mother and practically begged her to come over for dinner. She would be so pleased to have her son back. Plus he wanted to ask her for something.
The day went by so fast, mostly because he was anxious to see Leia. He almost burnt the food he was cooking. Dinner was not his specialty it was Reys. A smile graced his lips as he remembered wrapping his arms around her one night as she rolled pasta…
'Not only can you play almost every instrument under the sun, but you can also make fresh pasta?'
She blushed and he started placing kisses all over her red checks.
'Kylo, stop it!' she was laughing and swatting him with a flour covered towel.
He looked down at his flour covered shirt before narrowing his eyes at her.
'It's on.' he grabbed a handful of flour and threw it at her. Rey gasped as the flour went all over her. She smirked and reached out smearing her floured hand over his face.
Quickly the kitchen was covered in flour and filled with laughs and stolen kisses. Pasta be damned they made love on the kitchen counter with flour in their hair.
"Kylo?" Leia called out from the foyer breaking him from his thoughts. He sat down the plate of food and brushed his hands off.
"Good to see you mother." He approached her and pulled her into a hug.
"You too…" it had been a long time since he had hugged her. "I watched the verdict yesterday."
"Yea?" he pulled away from her to finish setting up dinner.
"I think the only thing that saved your ass was Rey." She said curtly.
"I know." Kylo sighed and gestured for her to take a seat as he took his own.
"You love her don't you." Leia stared at the scar on his face. In only a few months she had seen him change so much.
Kylo nodded slowly carefully watching her reaction. To his surprise she reached across the table and squeezed his arm.
"She is a good girl but doesn't deserve that kind of drama that comes with your life." Rey was special to Leia. Not only the perfect student but she was like the daughter she never had. But because the last conversation with Rey she thought it was best not to be her professor anymore.
"I know which is why I'm giving up the company. I'm changing it to a nonprofit." Leias eyes widened. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. For years she begged him not to follow in her husbands and fathers' path. "I decided some things, someone, are more important. I've made a lot of mistakes and I lost the most important person in my life, my mom."
"Ben…" she whispered without thinking.
"I'm sorry, for everything. It's just… when I came out of service I was changed." It was his turn to reach out and take her hand in his.
"Ben is it true what Rey said to me?" her voice was weak, on the verge of tears.
"What did she say to you?" he figured they talked to each other about him but to what extent.
"She said you have PTSD; Ben I didn't know. If I knew I wouldn't have acted the way I did but Rey knocked some sense into me, and I started putting it together." She was crying now. this was the root of his anger. He came out with all that shit on his mind and no one, not even his mother, saw the war continuing on in his head. That's what got the Kylo Ren ball rolling. He shot up from his seat and walked around the table kneeling next to her so that he was eye level. All these years he wanted her to understand and now she did all because of Rey.
"Its okay, you know now." he wiped the tears away from her face.
"My sweet boy, I think she loves you too." She reached in her pocket and pulled out a small black box. He knew exactly what it was. He was going to ask her for it but she already knew he was going to need it. "For when the time is right."
He grabbed Leia pulling her into a deep hug. Things were only going to get better. the rest of the dinner they talked about the future of the company and life itself. There was a flow to his mother that he hadn't seen since he was in high school before he left for basic. She could say the same thing about her son.
Xxx
Unfortunately, things were not going to get better that easy. He didn't hear from Rey the next few days. He sent her a good morning text the other day, but he heard nothing. He knocked it up to she was just taking her time. She hadn't even used his card again which he figured was fine too. It wasn't until her friend showed up in the lobby asking about her that he started the worry. The lobby had called him up saying someone was here looking for Rey. He looked at the front desk camera and recognized the man. He worked with Rey and was her best friend. Kylo told them to send him up.
Within minutes the door dinged, and he came out with a fury of panic in his eyes. He stormed up to Kylo and grabbed him by his shirt. Kylo could easily take this man down but Rey would not be happy with him if he did.
"Is she here?" he hissed shaking him.
"No, she's not. What the hell is going on?!" Kylo shoved him off.
"Rey is missing!" the words shook him to the core. After the verdict he canceled security for her.
"She hasn't answered her phone and I haven't seen her since the night after your fucked-up trial. She didn't go to class, her roommates haven't seen her, she didn't come in to work."
The man in front of him kept rambling on and pacing but Kylo could only hear his heart pounding in his ears. Red, all he could see was red. Someone took her and they probably have had her the last few days.
"I have to find her."
AN: okay I hate this chapter. I feel like I wrote too many twists and turns. But I thank all of you for sticking with me! I estimate 10 more chapters. After this I swear it'll get better for them.