Warped

by JJOAS

A 30 year old get's reincarnated into the body of one ten year old Jackie Burckhart and because of this cosmic hiccup this That 70's Show dimension get's a little warped. Slice of life.

12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: 1978

A crowd of people hustled and bustled around us in the church gymnasium. The smell of baked goods and the musk of church goers saturated the air. Only the short breeze that blew in through the gym doors brought any relief from the stuffy heat around us.

Caroline sat on a metal folding chair and filed down her nails, shooting us a syrupy smile, "You guys are so much fun to hang out with."

I titled my head to glance back at her before pulling my eyes away to the customer in front of me, "We really are." I tried my best to keep my tone light, but a bit of dryness must have leaked through because Caroline's eyes darkened slightly. Damn.

I handed a large chocolate cupcake to the gentleman in the strange suite in front of me, "Here you are. That's one large chocolate swirl cupcake for 50 cents."

He bobbed his head in thanks as he deposited the money into my waiting hand, "Hey thanks. Is this also at the bakery?" He took a large chunk out of the cupcake and let out a low groan.

I pocketed the money into our cash box and nodded, "Yep. Come on by, you can also get our other sweets and treats at Rolling Scones."

Nodding and continuing to devour the cupcake, he threw a smile over his shoulder, "Yeah, thanks. I will."

Caroline hummed and leaned over to peer at Donna's magazine, "So what does your Cosmo say about me? I'm a Gemini."

Donna gave her an uncomfortable look and scooted over slightly away from her before nodding, "Um, okay, the twins. Two people trapped in one body. So you're, like, a split personality."

Caroline's eyes got flinty as she hissed out, jabbing a finger at Donna, "If you ever say that again, I'll kill you."

The silence that reigned between all of us was thick, as varying looks of wariness and apprehension flooded onto our faces.

Suddenly, Caroline's sneering rage collapsed into hysterical giggles, "I'm kidding. I'm kidding! God, you guys. I'm psycho, remember? Whoo-hoo!" She wiggled her fingers around her head in a circle, a sneering smile on her face. I drew my eyes back to the people that circled in and around our booth, instead of the creepy look on Caroline's face.

Annette let out a hesitant smile, "Wow, that was- that was really good."

Donna nodded silently and tightened her grip on her magazine, her jaw twitching. She was definitely holding back something rude.

I couldn't help the snark that escaped me as I deadpanned, "I almost wet myself."

People started to peruse our booth again when it didn't seem like Caroline was about to go on a murder spree. I pasted on my best retail smile, "Cupcakes, cookies, and raffles galore! Come on over!"

Donna coughed and nodded, "Alright. Alright. Enough small talk. Let's talk about something other than my magazine."

Annette perked up and nodded before shooting Caroline a sly look, "Oh! So, is Fez, like, an amazing kisser?"

Caroline blushed prettily and fanned her face as she preened, "Annie, don't make me blush."

Annette tilted her head and blinked curiously at Caroline, "No, I'm only asking because when he kissed me, he did this thing with his tongue."

In an instant, her blushing face vanished as Caroline's hands dropped onto her lap. Her blue eyes darkened as she lasered a glare into Annette, "You kissed Fez? My Fez?"

At the dark look Caroline kept shooting at her, Annette back pedaled and waved her hands in front of her in a placating motion, "Oh, my God. It was so nothing. Way before you guys were dating. It was just a goodbye kiss that he gave me. I don't think that he thought I would come back to this place. Anyway, he had this stupid crush on me before so..."

Caroline looked down past her bangs, shading her expression from us as she muttered, "Huh. I see..."

I slitted my eyes towards the drama unfolding beside me and murmured, "Well, I didn't see that coming." I shot Donna a questioning look. Did she know about this? She was closer to Annette than I was.

Donna snorted at the look I gave her and shook her head, "Hey, I didn't know about this either, Lin. Don't give me that look."

I unappologetically smiled at her and shrugged. Tip tap. Tip tap. I looked ahead of me and around before I noted a tiny hand tapping some coins on the top of my booth table. I peered down and beamed, "Oh, hi Hope."

She grinned up at me and held out her coins, "Could I have a cookie?"

I was about to reply when Caroline jumped up off of her seat and screamed at Annette, just stopping an inch from trying to rip her face off with her nails, "If any of you ever touches my boyfriend I will hunt you all down like animals! Understand!"

She stared her blue bug eyes at a stunned Donna and Annette, but I was more concerned about the little girl that was near tears because of her. I whipped around and glared at her, snarling just quietly enough so Hope wouldn't hear me, "The fuck Caroline. We're at a freaking bake sale at a church. Dial it back like a thousand, or fraking leave. You're making people uncomfortable."

I gestured to the little girl on the verge of tears in front of us.

Caroline followed my hand and paled before she huffed. She sent us all a withering look before crossing her arms and slumping back into her seat.

Hope's lip quivered and I hastily grabbed the biggest chocolate chip cookie near me, "Oh don't cry, Hope! Here, you can have a cookie on me."

Hesitantly, she took the cookie and shot Caroline a wary look before shifting her big blue eyes at me, "O-okay. She won't be at the bakery if I want any other cookies, will she, Miss Lin?"

My smile softened and I did my best to suffuse reassurance in my voice, "Nope, she won't. Say hi to your mom, dad, and new baby brother for me, okay?"

Hope scrubbed her eyes a little and held the cookie to her chest, before grinning, "Kay." With that, she ran off into the crowd. Hopefully her parents weren't too close to our booth to have seen Caroline's blow out.

I glanced at her from the side of my eyes and frowned. She looked like she was gonna explode from the amount of bottled up anger on her face.

Tentatively, Donna hedged out a question, "You're kidding about hurting us, right?"

Annette let out a laugh that sounded a little too forced, "You're kidding, right? Caroline?"

At that point, Caroline jumped off of her seat and hissed at Annette and Donna, "I'll scratch your big, dumb eyes out if you ever mention Fez! Got it? Ugh!"

With an indignant shriek, she stomped off into the crowd amongst the church bakery and raffle. The people that she passed, gave way to her like the red sea to Moses.

I shook my head. She sure did like causing a scene. Crazy weirdo.

Donna stared after her and let out a surprised breath, "Oh, my God."

I tilted my head towards them and nodded, "I know, right. None of that was necessary. And she didn't help with selling any of the baked goods."

Donna raised a brow and let out an amused laugh, "Heh. Always business with you, huh shortie? Seriously though, the fuck?" She turned her attention back towards where Caroline had stomped off, disappearing in the throng of people.

Annette slowly nodded, "She was scary. Her nails were beautiful though. Like painted claws."

I choked out a laugh and tried to keep a straight face, "Not the point, Annette, so not the point. And also, could you guys help me with this? This is important to Mrs. Forman." The unsold cupcakes and cookies were quite a small smattering in comparison to when we'd opened up the booth earlier, but still. The goal was to sell everything. Not almost everything.

Donna rolled her eyes and shrugged, as she sidled up to stand beside me, "Awe fine." Her height in comparison to mine while we stood side by side, made her look vaguely Amazonian. I wasn't going to voice that though.

At the sight of Annette zoning out on her nails and not getting up to help, I snapped, "Annette."

She averted her eyes from me and muttered, "What? She was scary. I'm too traumatized to work."

"Yeah really, really, scary, but that doesn't mean you can't help sell cupcakes and cookies," I shot her a narrowed eyed gimlet stare.

Annette slowly slid off of her chair and dusted off imaginary lint from her dress, "Okay, guys, she was more like exorcist scary."

Fez was strolling by and I noticed that he seemed to be looking for someone. Knowing that he had a sweet tooth the size of Mt. Everest, I called out, "Oh, hey Fez. You wanna buy a cupcake for 50 cents?"

Fez jogged over and waved beaming up at as. He stopped at our booth and opened his mouth. Before he could say anything, Annette had come around to his side and situated herself between Fez and the booth.

She tugged at his arm, a serious look on her face, as she batted her lashes up at him, "Fez, never mind about the cupcake. You have to break up with Caroline. She totally said she'd hurt us!"

Fez tilted his head to the side and gently patted Annette's head, "Okay, you are overreacting. She is a little loony, yes, but she would not hurt you."

Caroline popped out of seemingly nowhere and narrowed her gaze at Annette, "Hey."

Fez extracted himself from Annette's grip and wrapped an arm around his crazy girlfriend, "Hello, my sweet girlfriend."

She gave him a grunt before hissing at Annette, "We've been over this!"

Fez tightened his hold on Caroline, thus preventing her from lunging at us with her frighteningly long nails, "Caroline!?"

Caroline struggled slightly against his hold on her and snarled, "Touch Fez and die!"

Fez took her shoulders into his hands and pulled her slightly away from us. A frown deeply furrowed his brow, "Stop it! These are my friends!"

She ripped away from Fez's grip and blinked watery eyes up at him. Caroline growled and jabbed at his chest, "Oh, really!? Did they shoplift $30 worth of inedible ink markers and write your name on every inch of their room? Every God damn motherfucking inch! Did they?" At the end of her rant she was panting, stray tears dripped down her face as she scrubbed them away with her knuckles.

Fez's eyes turned worried as he hesitantly muttered, "Um, did you guys do that?"

Annette's eyes were wide as a single word popped past of her lips, "Nope.

My tone was flat as my lips thinned, "No, we did not, for obvious reasons, Fez." My hands twitched slightly as I clenched and unclenched my fingers. That was a bit much. And that was putting it lightly.

When Fez's gaze roved towards Donna, she spluttered, "Good grief, no." She crossed her arms and jutted her hip out, aggravation poured out of her stance.

A smug look took over Caroline's face as she saw all of our horrified faces, "Well, there you have it! See!?" She turned her desperate crazy eyes to Fez expectantly.

Fez took a step back away from her closer to our booth. He cleared his throat and threw her an apprehensive grimace, "Um, Caroline, I have to break up with you."

Caroline's bottom lip wobbled as her voice warbled, "Why? And don't say it's because I'm crazy because I am not crazy."

Fez shook his head rapidly as he waved his hands in front of him in a passive motion. He glanced at each of us before his gaze settled to Donna. His eyes darted back to Caroline, "Oh, no. Oh- Oh, no. Of cour- Of course not. It's just, um- It's just, um- - Donna and I are in love."

"What?" At this statement, Donna was jostled enough that her arms fell out from their previous position. Disapproval coated her face.

I choked on my spit for a moment and flailed a little to get some air. Donna pounded her fist on my back as I hacked up a cough to clear my lungs. My eyes watered and I shook my head. This was way too out there.

Annette raised an eyebrow at a very disgruntled looking Donna. She scrunched up her face and wrinkled her nose, "Oh, my God. Ewww!"

"Yes, we are freaky for each other. Please tell her," Fez ignored Caroline's glower that was aimed at us and nodded rapidly. He gave Donna a covert glance and murmured under his breath, "Donna, please." His voice screamed desperation.

At this point, I was fine. Well. Besides the shock at this weird turn of events.

Donna deeply frowned and muttered under her breath, "What if she tries to kill me?" Her eyes warily took in Caroline's shaking form. She certainly wasn't shaking from sadness at this rate.

Annette pipped up quietly and assured Donna in a slightly insulting fashion, "You're a giant. You can take her."

Donna shot the blonde an unimpressed expression.

I decided to throw my two cents in as well, "We'll back you up on this, Big Red. I swear I think I have a whiffle ball bat that you can smack her with if she comes at you with her nails." I nodded slowly as I tried to remember where I may have put that specific bat. Somewhere in my garage, probably.

An incredulous look engulfed Donna's face, "A whiffle ball bat, Lin? That won't do anything." Her doubt shone through her eyes. Oh yee of little faith.

"Still…" I chewed my bottom lip in thought. A normal one wouldn't, but maybe if I filled mine with something? Nah.

Annette cleared her throat and shot a worried look at Caroline, "It's better than crazy over there."

I bit my inner cheek and sighed, "Annette has a good point."

At this point Caroline had leaned in and coined into the fact that Fez was quite serious about his statement. She grit her teeth, "Oh, my God. You're really breaking up with me?"

Fez backed up further, actually jostling our booth this time, "Is that okay?"

Caroline's narrowed gaze assessed us all before she backed up. She titled her head and let her focus fall only to her ex-boyfriend. With a deep breath, she smiled. A smile with too much teeth.

Her voice turned sickly sweet, "Fez, I just want to say that you will never be as happy as you were with me! Ever. And until you realize that, I'll be seeing you. And by 'I'll be seeing you', I mean that I'll be watching you…but you won't know it. Except I just told you, so you do know it. Anyway, this isn't over!" With that, she flipped her hair and stalked into the crowd and out of the gym.

The crowd that had formed and stalled around our booth gave us varying looks from curiosity to disapproval. I mean. I could totally get it. This wasn't exactly church like behavior.

"Whew. Sure am glad that's over," Fez shook his head and grinned. He waved at us as he skipped away. The threat that Caroline had handed him, all but forgotten.

I turned and glanced at Donna and Annette. My eyes narrowed as a mean smile melted onto my face, "Now you two have to help me sell the rest of this stuff." I gestured to the sweets left on our booth's table top.

Donna rolled her eyes, "Ughh." She did still give me a resigned nod though. I'd take it. Better reluctance than running from me.

Annette whined, "Awe, Lin." Her attempt at puppy dog eyes didn't sway me.

I rolled my eyes and twerked her nose, "Come on. Don't be lazy. We'll be done in no time." I pasted on my retail smile once more. Only 12 more pastries to go.

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The sweltering sunshine made Eric's basement smell musky. The fans whirred on in the background along with the buzzing of the TV. It was another rerun of Gilligan's island. Well. A rerun for me anyways.

I adjusted myself to sit more comfortably onto Steven's lap. I wriggled a little, laughing inwardly when I felt him let out a husky breath against the back of my neck. He tightened his hold against my waist. I knew that I wasn't really helping, but making him hot and bothered even just a little puffed up my spirits.

Michael booped Brooke's nose and cooed, "I don't wanna blink, 'cause I'm afraid to miss even a second of your cuteness."

She preened under his attention and pecked him on the lips, "I know. It's torture for me too."

Steven snorted and snarked, "I could tear your eyelids off, you guys are so cute." The sarcasm dripped from his voice like molasses.

Michael shot us all a derisive look, "Let's go, Brooke, to a place where our love is understood." He got up from their previous position on the ground by the coffee table.

Brooke followed after him and hummed out a suggestion, "Or we could just go to the zoo?"

Michael's face lip up as they joined hands, "We could also do that. Goodbye losers!" With that, he stuck out his tongue and flipped us all the bird as they headed towards the basement back door.

I perked up when they mentioned the zoo. Straightening my back, I called out before they disappered through the doorway, "Oh, hey, while you're there check out the new monkey house! I heard they brought in chimpanzees."

Brooke threw me a grin and waved, "Thanks Lin! Bye guys."

Eric stared after them and rolled his eyes once they were out of the basement. With a snort he sighed, "It never ends with those two. I love you, I love you, I love you." He noted that Donna was, once again, too absorbed in reading her latest magazine to really pay him any attention. Frowning, an impish gleam glittered in his eyes before he blew a raspberry into her neck.

Donna let out a shriek, dropping her magazine, as she pushed Eric away. Her mouth pulled down, but her eyes crinckled in amusement, "Eric!"

Eric put his lower lip out and did his best impression of a puppy, "What? I do love you. A raspberry is just the loud version of me saying it."

Seeing his expression, Donna rolled her eyes, her lips slightly lifted up, "Dork."

My attention was drawn back to Steven when he brushed his lips against the back of my neck. He lowly breathed out, "Did you wanna go to the zoo, doll?"

I leaned back into his chest and hummed, "Mmmm. Probably. I really did want to check in with those chimpanzees. I heard that they do tricks if you offer them bananas."

He leaned his head onto my shoulder and murmured, "What kind of tricks?"

I titled my head to the side as I chewed my lower lip in thought, "I dunno. I think we'd have to go and check it out to find out."

Steven hummed into the back of my head as he rolled what I said around his head. He nodded slightly, "Huh. Okay. Next date night then."

I leaned back with his head on my shoulder to get a better look at his face, "Yeah?"

He shot me a smirk, "Yeah."

Annette grunted and broke the moment we were having. She stared at the basement back door with a scowl, "Guys, this one won't last either. Brooke and Michael will break up. I know it." If looks could kill, that door would be a pile of splinters.

An understanding look broke onto Steve's face, "You might have a point. An object in an unnatural state must return to its natural state. Following this line of thought... Kelso probably will mess up, and he and Brooke'll have a fight." He pursed his lips at this revelation.

The gears in my head started spinning as my brain pinged. A deep sigh escaped me before I could stop it, "Oh, but then eventually they'll break up and he'll be single again. Even if it's his pattern, he really should break it."

His chest rumbled slightly as he chuckled, "I love how you get me, doll."

I threw him a wink over my shoulder with a smile, "S'how we work, puddin' pop."

Eric shot us a disgruntled look and threw a throw pillow at us, "Okay, you two. We already had enough secret talks and goo goo eyes from the two that left."

Steven deftly caught the pillow, letting go of my waist, and rolled his eyes, "Shut up, Forman."

Donna frowned and chewed the chip she'd stolen from the chips I had brought over earlier, "Seriously though. Do you two really think-?"

Annette pipped up from her seat, condescension coating her words, "Of course. It's simple physics."

I snorted out a laugh and stole the pillow away from Steven before chucking it back at Eric, "I don't think you get what physics is, Annette. By the way, how are you able to just up and leave Texas whenever?"

Eric blew a raspberry at me after catching the pillow. He handed it over to Donna, who in turn cuddled into it before picking up her magazine again.

Annette kicked out her legs now and again from her seat on one of the big boxes by the couch, "Well, Miss Smarty pants…I was thinking of maybe…moving back here to live with my uncle and my aunt. And of course I can afford it. I'm rich. Duh." She waved her hand in the air with a slight bit of flair to emphasize her point.

A deadpanned look littered my face as I flatly replied, "You mean with your cousin Pam too? The same Pam that you hate? The one that I swear you threatened to scalp the last time you two had a screaming match? And I'm fairly certain we're all aware of you being rich Annette. It's hard not to notice."

Donna looked up and glanced at Annette with a thoughtful look before raising her brow, "I mean, you are wearing head to toe Gucci today."

Annette's face lit up, her eyes shined as she gazed at Donna, "I'm so glad you noticed, Donna! I din't even know that you knew what that brand was."

Donna huffed and rolled her eyes as she settled back into the couch with her magazine. She let her head lean against Eric's shoulder. A soft smile spread across Eric's face as he glanced her way.

I blinked and snorted, "Good threat, by the way."

Annette pursed her lips like a duck and tsked my way, "Shush, Lin. It's more of a familial hate anyways. I just miss this place and Texas isn't as great as I thought it would be. Besides, daddy never notices when I'm gone anyways."

Memories of how I felt when my nanny fucked off assuaged me. I shot her an empathetic look, "That's really sad, Annette. I'm sorry."

A flicker of pain flashed in her eyes before she shuttered her expression into something blasé as she waved it off, "It is, what it is."

A mean smile plucked her lips up, "Hey, you guys, you know what? We should get a pool going on when they're break. We'll draw days for five bucks. If they fight on your day, you win the pot."

Eric tilted his head and hummed, "The pot?"

Steven's eyes shone as an impish glee engulfed his expression, "If there's the prize, I am in."

I pursed my lips in thought and let out a deep sigh. As much as I loved my friends and Steven, they were such assholes to people sometimes. God damn.

Suddenly, the basement back door swung open, reveling Fez. He shot everyone a smile as he swallowed down some jelly beans, "Hey, guys!"

Annette roved her eyes towards Fez and waved, "Hiya."

Donna flipped a page of her Cosmo and glanced up, "Hey, Fez."

Eric shot him a smile as he tucked Donna further into his side, "Hey, man."

I wiggled my fingers his way and chimed, "Hello, Fez."

Steven leaned his head on my shoulder and nodded, "Hey, cocoa puff." I leaned over towards the coffee table and snatched a handful while everyone was more or less focused of Fez. Steven let out a slightly irritated breath and I rolled my eyes in return. The smile tugging on my lips softened my irritation though.

Wiggling, I settled myself back onto Steven's lap and we both took turns throwing chips into the air and catching it.

Fez strode over to where Donna and Eric sat and leaned against the back of his couch with his forearms. A bright grin painted his face, "Donna, I can't thank you enough for agreeing to help me with Caroline."

She tilted her head up and back to get a better look at him, "Anything for a friend, but if she tries to hurt me, I'm using you as a meat shield." Her tone was flat and as dry as the Sahara.

It didn't deter Fez's happy enthusiasm, "Likewise."

Steven deftly caught a chip in his mouth, shooting me a smug smile. Crunching and swallowing first, he turned his attention onto Eric, "So, while Big Red's with Fez, looks like you'll be living the single life."

Eric tilted his head and let out a bemused breath, "Oh, yeah. That's right."

Donna chuckled and shouldered her boyfriend playfully, "Oh, now you won't get to take me to see The Turning Point."

"The ballerina movie? Oh, no," He contorted his face into a poor imitation of disappointment, his voice dripped with sarcasm. It didn't take long for him to dissolve into snickers.

"Yeah. Yeah. Laugh it up chuckles," a fond smile found it's way onto Donna's face as she rolled her eyes.

I had the oddest feeling like this was going to blow up in their faces. Then again... Most of their schemes in this vein usually did.

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Late afternoon sunlight shone through my kitchen window as I watched the mixer whisk cream and sugar mix for some whipped creme. The sweet scent filtered in through my nostrils as Steven gave me a hug from behind. Ahhh. This was great.

The door to the backyard swung open and revealed a chipper looking Eric, "Hey, Hyde! Hey, little sister." He waltzed in without a care and plopped onto one of our island bar stools.

Steven released me from his embrace and turned to Eric with an appraising look. I sighed and let the machine do its thing. It would only take a couple more minutes at this rate, and then we'd finally have the perfect whipped creme for some apple pie.

I shot him a raised brow over my shoulder, "Hey, Eric. So you really let Fez borrow Donna, huh?"

He leaned his elbows on the cold granite of my kitchen island and let a single word plop out of his mouth, "Yup."

Steven hummed a frown furrowed his forehead, "Welcome to the "bachelor" life, I guess, Forman. Just watch what you do."

The cream and sugar mixture turned into stiff white peaks. It was done, more or less. I took out the metal mixing bowl and let it rest against the kitchen island before shooting Eric a warning look, "Just remember this isn't "actual" bachelor life, Eric. Don't do anything stupid."

I strode off towards the oven, stuck oven mitts onto my hands and gently took out the warm apple pie out of the oven. We'd left it in the oven earlier so it wouldn't rapidly cool while we made whipped creme.

Eric snorted out a laugh and tracked the apple pie I was holding, "Oh little sister, of little faith. It'll be fine. You know, without Donna I've realized that I can revert to my natural state. I'm dirty, I'm lazy and I don't like to wear pants. I'm just like you, Hyde. Shorts city. Besides, you two should be nicer to me. Mom totally froze out my butt last month and didn't even give me a cake for my birthday."

He had a fair enough point, but it was his fault for forgetting his mom's birthday. Even if it was his 18th birthday last month, it wasn't like he actually went without a cake. Well, from us anyways. Kitty was still sore over her lack of celebration for her 50th birthday.

Steven huffed out an irritated breath, "No, no, no, no. See, I'm an original. A Warhol. You're just a print. And hey, let me remind you, Forman, my girl and I ended up giving you one of those fancy cakes you'd been eyeing at the bakery."

I pursed my lips and nodded, "Yeah, Eric. I thought you liked that cake." It had been one of the rainbow crepe cakes with real butter creme frosting between each layer topped with a chocolate ganache.

With a flick of my wrist I sliced up the pie into six equal slices before scooping out a large dollop of whipped creme for three pieces. We'd made far too much whipped creme, but I figure once Eric left we could do something with it.

I slid over a piece of pie towards Eric, and Steven held out a fork to him. He happily took both the fork and pie and grinned at us before shrugging, "I did. I'm just saying, it wasn't my mom's cake or you know a party."

I raised a brow at him and took a bite of pie. Ahhh. It was just right. The pie crust of flakey and slightly sweet, the spiced apples melted in my mouth, and the whipped creme cooled it just ever so slightly.

I thoughtfully chewed before swallowing, "You did forget your mother's birthday. And it wasn't just any old birthday either. Turning 50 is kind of a big deal."

Eric devoured more of his pie before rolling his eyes and talking with his mouth full, "Yeah, but that was like 2 months ago now."

Crinkling my brow and making I face, I shot him a disgusted look, "In any case, you're being gross Eric. We get it."

He laughed at my obvious discomfort and exaggerated his chewing and lip smacking. God. I hated that.

Steven narrowed his gaze at Eric and stabbed his pie, "Just don't take off your shorts, or if you want to, go back to your house, Forman."

Shrugging, he finally finished his pie piece, "I like it here, and Hyde, those are some pretty strong words coming from a guy who's wearing pants."

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Steven flipped a burger before letting it sizzle onto the grill. The blue sky was bared before us as the sun shone down it's rays of sunlight. White fluff balls of clouds sanguinely sailed the sky.

I snuggled into my lawn chair and inhaled the smell of sweet grass, heat, and the scent of burgers being cooked on a grill. I loved our impromptu backyard bbqs like this. Even if the heat made my top stick to my skin. I fanned myself with my hand and sighed. The shade from our peach tree helped some, but not enough to really cool me down. I bit my lower lip in thought, 'Perhaps I should purchase one of those beach umbrellas...'

A loud gurgle brought me out of my thoughts. At the sight of Fez, on the ground not far from me, drooling at the sight of the growing number of burger patties beside Steve, I could tell he liked these get togethers as well. An impatient look was strewn across his face.

My own stomach grumbled. Steven would be done soon. He liked finishing the meat before anything else, and I would respect his wishes on that. I think he just liked eating with us instead of cooking while we ate though. It probably made him feel left out, and I'd never want to do that to him.

Annette sashayed in though my backyard gate with a pep in her step and an impish smile smeared on her face. She gave my straw hat and halter top a cursory glance before plopping down into a nearby lawn chair.

Steven caught sight of Annette's cat-that-caught-the-canary smile, "Hey, how goes the pool?"

Annette preened and reclined the chair, holding a goldfish bowl of money against her chest, "Great. I sold 15 spots. I got today. You got tomorrow evening."

I balked at that information and whipped a glare at Steve, "What? Steven." I clucked my tongue at him. Brooke was our friend. Well, at the very least, she was my friend.

Steven bonelssly shrugged as a roughish smile rounded onto his face, "It's an interesting pool, doll. Plus, what's the harm?"

I puffed up my cheeks and stared hard at him. His grin faltered before he turned back. Ahhh. So he did feel a little guilty about this. I swiftly got up and strode towards him. His shoulders were tense. Just because he did shit like this, didn't mean I loved him any less. He was the chaotic neutral to my neutral good sometimes, and I very well knew that.

Eric let his legs splay out before him as he leaned back on his elbows from his position on the ground. He puffed out an irritated breath, "Man, that bites. They're never gonna last until then."

I wrapped my arms around Steven's torso, and ignored the way his shirt was stuck onto his back, "Pshhh. Well I think you guys are wrong. They'll last longer than that."

Steven let the hand that wasn't grilling, gently pet my arm as his shoulders slowly relaxed. I kissed his back and murmured, "I love you. Nothing will change that. Not even when you do stuff that I don't agree with."

He stilled for a moment. And all I could hear between us was our heart beats, the murmur of our friends in the background, and the sizzle of meat. A long sigh escaped him before he turned in my arms.

I could see his eyes soften behind his sunglasses. He leaned down and brushed a rough kiss onto my mouth, nibbling on my bottom lip, before he let his forehead rest against mine, "I know. I love you too. No matter what shit you do, or what shit I do."

His uncomfortable smile told me all I needed to know. I'd have to comfort him more later tonight. He didn't like letting himself feel vulnerable around our friends. It didn't seem to sit well with him.

Michael's head popped over the fence, a goofy grin grew on lips, "Who'll last longer than what?"

I blinked and stared at him, "What?" Was he here the entire time? Also, why didn't he just go through my garden gate? It was wide open after all. Annette had the bad habit of not closing it when she came through.

Fez let out a slightly panicked, "Huh?"

Eric shot Michael his best confused expression, "Huh?" Did playing dumb always work with this guy? Cause it didn't work when he tried to pull that shit with me.

Steven looked over at him as I untangled my arms from his waist. He made a face and turned to give Michael a wary glance, "What? Oh. Uh. I, uh- I smashed a couple of toes. We're waiting to see how long before the nails fall off." With that he pulled his attention back to grilling the last burger patties on the grill.

Michael bounced like a golden retriever with a ball, "I wanna play."

Brooke popped up beside him and pulled on his arm, "Uh, Michael, we were just about to head out, remember?" At the sight of Brooke I took in their clothes. They were dressed fancier today in comparison to their normal t-shirt and jeans ensemble.

Michael let himself be pulled away, but whined, "But, Brooke, those toenails could fall off at any minute." His shoulders slumped as he tried to pull a puppy dog eyed look at Brooke.

It did nothing and Brooke's resolute expression remained unchanged, "I'm sorry, sweetie, but you promised, and it's important to keep those.

He let out a defeated sigh and threw us a resigned wave goodbye, "Alright, bye guys. Save me a burger!" Suddenly his face lit up as an idea churned in his brain, "Do I get pudding too? I heard that the fancy place you wanna go to does a chocolate mousse pudding." The thought of sweets lifted up his spirits.

A fond smile found its way onto Brooke's face, "Yes, as much as you'd like. Bye, guys."

As they walked away I called out and waved, "Bye, Brooke! Bye Michael. We'll save you one in our fridge." I'd have to do that sooner rather than later. Fez looked like he could eat the entire plate with the way he was devouring it all with his eyes.

Fez made a face and sighed, "Now I feel like having pudding." He was still eyeing the burgers even when he said that. Perhaps he wanted pudding with his burger? I mean, it wouldn't be that weird... Right?

Eric got up and stretched. He shot us all a smug smile as he made gribby grab hands towards the fish bowl full of money, "Well, I believe this is mine. Thank you all for playing."

Before he could even take a step in Annette's direction, she pulled the fishbowl closer to her chest. With a sneer she thrust her nose into the air, "What? That wasn't a fight."

Steven let out a snicker and placed the last succulent burger patty onto the already large pile beside us, "That was hardly even an argument." They glistened in the early afternoon light. A breeze blew by and I inhaled the scent of grilled meat, hickory smoke, onions, garlic, and spice. I bit my lip and hummed. The fresh buns I made this morning would pair perfectly with this.

Eric rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, "Okay, we'll let Fez decide. Fez, fight or no?"

Fez got up from his seat on the ground and blinked at them before slowly edging over to the table by the grill, "Sorry, Eric. I have to say no. The pool goes on."

A sour expression surges onto Eric's face as he shakes his head, "But, Fez, l-"

Fez held up a hand before he waggled his finger, "I said, it goes on. Now let us eat this feast! Where are the buns and extra stuff? I mean, I can eat just the meat, but I did like the idea of American hamburgers." He pouted and looked around as though they would appear out of thin air if he searched hard enough.

I chimed in, just as my stomach gurgles in protest, "Oh, me too. I'm starving."

Steven wiped his hands on his 'I'm the cook. Deal with it' apron before adjusting his zen, "I'm with you, doll." He never did like looking like he was too hungry or too thirsty. No matter how far from the truth it was. I remembered the conversation about the pure neglect he'd had to undergo from his fucking parents... I yanked that thought shut. Nope. Nope.

Eric shrugged and glanced at the burger patties with a keen interest, "Food would be good."

Annette, on the other hand, stayed in the lounger she had claimed and stretched out further, "I can wait a little. I'm tanning, and the sun's not going to be out forever."

With that, Fez let out a little cheer and pumped his fist into the air, "Let us go off to get some parts for our burgers!"

As he marched towards my house, I nodded and added, "Sure thing. I made some fresh buns in the morning that should still be good. Oh! I also picked up some of that nice cheese from the deli the other day, along with some fresh vegetables."

Steven gave my rear a little smack, which led me into letting out a slight shriek mixed in with a laugh.

Fez, in his over enthusiasm, did the same action cooing, "The best little goddess."

I frowned at Fez and scooted closer to Steven as we walked in through the backdoor into the kitchen.

Steven wrapped a consoling arm around me before frogging Fez in the shoulder with his free hand, "Fez. Watch it."

Eric let out a disgusted noise, "Dude, come on! No perving on my sisters. We've been over this."

Fez's face turned sheepish, "Sorry." Did this mean that he was still perving on Laurie too?

wvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvw

The sound of customers chatting, the till ringing every so often, and the pitter patter of feet moving about buzzed in the background. Sweet scents clung in the air along with the comforting smell of roasting coffee. I kept my eye on Eric and Fez to both make sure they wouldn't run out on us, and to monitor how well they were doing with their simple task. Plus, I just liked eavesdropping sometimes. So sue me.

Eric hefted a pile of the boxed macaroons that Lee had made, and Mabel had put together, beside him. In return for the fabulous lunch I had hosted with Steven, I had gained them as minions for the rest of the day. With additional pastries as a further bribe, to sweeten the deal. It all worked out. Well. For us anyways.

Fez bounced on his feet and waved the paper with the instructions for the display at his side, "Eric, I cannot thank you enough for lending me your girlfriend. It feels so good to be in a normal, healthy relationship."

Eric shot him a slightly exasperated look as he snatched the paper, and looked at it this way and that, "Fez, it's a fake, pretend relationship. Hand me that box of macaroons, please. I need to fill this display. Man, working like this on my day off. Jeeze. Those cinnamon buns though... Plus we did get burgers earlier..."

Fez took out a box of macaroons and handed it to him with a shrug, "You say toe-may-toe, I say toe-may-toe. Here you go."

Eric placed the paper down and took the box before placing it just so, "Ah Fez, it's "to-mah-to." And thanks."

A confused look covered Fez's face, "What?"

Eric grabbed another box around him and started to make the display in earnest, "You pronounce it 'to-mah-to'."

A silly smile surged onto his lips as he waggled his finger at Eric, "Why would I say "to-mah-to"? That's not even a word, dummy."

Eric rolled his eyes and let out a sigh as he quickly started building up the display, "Yeah. You know what, I'm sorry." Some sayings just didn't translate well.

"It's okay, Eric. Different strokes for different strokes," Fez shrugged, a well meaning look latched onto his visage.

Eric finished the display and stepped back to admire his work before shooting Fez a slightly disgruntled look, "Right."

His irritation slid off of Fez like a duck in water. Fez bounced on his feet again, a dreamy gaze grew in his eyes, "All I know is, if I was married to a woman like Donna it would be heavens. Oh, the high jinks we would get into." A small giggle escaped him as he daydreamed.

Eric pulled a face and frowned, "Hey, Fez, Donna hasn't been I don't know, like, mentioning me or anything?"

Fez blinked repeatedly, dissolving his daydream before pursing his lips and shaking his head, "Nope."

Sadness flickered onto Eric's face for a moment before he pulled on a strained smile, "Well, that- that's okay. That's good, 'cause I haven't been talking about her either." Damn. That was kind of harsh.

With a jingle jangle, Brooke and Michael strode into the bakery arm in arm. Their smiles were proof another date going well between them. It was nice seeing Brooke take vacation days. The others didn't really like or want to, but that was their preoperative. It wasn't like I disintegrated the vacation days they didn't use anyways. I don't think they knew it, but whatever days they didn't use, I'd just pop over to the next cycle. Cause I'm a great boss that way. Well... For 70's standards anyways.

Mabel perked up at the sight of them and hurried her customer along in the nicest way possible. As they drew closer, an impish look shined in her eyes. She threw them a shark like smile, which was odd on her face, "Oh, hey, Michael, uh Pam Macy she said she had a really great time making out with you last night."0

I shuttered a glare her way and hissed, "Mabel, et tu? Seriously?" We all knew that was a lie. He was out playing with the Peterson's new puppy yesterday. Again. I bumped into Mrs. Peterson laughing about how cute the two were when Kitty and I went grocery shopping last night. I rolled my eyes at that thought.

Mabel pouted and crossed her arms in defiance, "What? That pool is huge. I hear it's like $300 now. No one's betting that they'll break up. Just, you know, fight. And if the fight carries on for two days. Well..." At the end of her sentence, a sheepish look came across her face as scratched at her neck.

Charlie looped over and gave his last customer in line a charming grin after they paid before chiming in, "For shame... I heard it too. I bet on them having a blow out tomorrow."

A disappointed and disgruntled look dawned onto my faces as my shoulders sagged, "Not you too, Charlie!"

Where was the loyalty? She was part of our business family, and she was a pretty good friend to all of us. The fuck, guys. I kept my thoughts to myself though. It wouldn't do for me to let out too much steam here, even if I owned the place. Professional. Must be professional.

Charlie sent me an unapologetic smile and shrugged, "Everyone's heard about the pool except these two, boss. It'd be a crime if we didn't participate."

I deadpanned, "Mhmm. Crime indeed." Jeeze. Couldn't you guys gamble on something else? Like the lottery or horse racing or something? I held down the urge to roll my eyes again.

Annette threw down the menu she'd been hiding behind, at a nearby table. A smirk wavered on her face as she sashayed towards the door, "Well, I gotta go. My aunt needs some help since my cousin refuses to lift boxes. See you guys soon." She wiggled her fingers at us and departed like there was fire on her heels.

I nodded at her retreating back and called out just as the door closed behind her, "Bye, Annette."

Brooke pushed away from Michael with an outraged face and a wobbling lower lip, "Michael!"

Michael shook his head like a wet dog, and waved his hands in front of him rapidly, "No! No! We did not! I swear!"

Steven coughed behind his fist as he tucked in some chairs, "Fight! Fight! Fight!"

A pout pulled at Michael's mouth, "No fair, man."

Brooke's jaw tightened as she tried to best to reign in her temper, "Shut up!"

Eric hurried over and huffed, "My day's almost over! Now, hurry up and fight! I think you should hit him."

Brooke whipped her head towards Eric and pinned him down with a gimlet stare, "What!?"

Michael tilted his head, "What?"

Her nostrils flared as she took in a calming breath, "Forman, why are you trying to make us fight?"

I don't know what got into Eric's head but he just kept going. I wish I could've shut him up, but it was like watching an accident happening in front of you in slow motion. Fascinating, but horrifying.

Eric made a face and gesticulated with his hands, "Cause I've got today in the pool. Come on, Brooke, hit him!"

Brooke whipped around to Michael, shame and anger colored her voice, "Oh, my God. The pool wasn't about Hyde's toenails. These idiots bet on when you and I would fight."

I raised a brow and loudly cleared my throat. Mabel and Charlie quickly went back to their posts and whistled innocently. Innocent my ass.

Blue eyes quickly found me before crinkling slightly, "I don't mean you, boss. You didn't, though, right?" The doubt was clear in her gaze. That and a bit of fear. Did she really think I would go along with something like this? God, people.

A slightly put out look lapped at my face before I let it drop. I sighed and crossed my arms, "No, no I didn't, Brooke." Maybe one of the few around you. Not that I was going to say anything like that though.

Relief made her sag just a little as we maintained eye contact, "Thanks. I'm glad these idiots didn't manage to pull you in too."

Steven snickered as a mean smile stretched his lips, "Kelso! Are you gonna take that, man? She called your friends idiots. You better start kickin' some ass!"

I'm pretty sure Steven didn't have today as a bet, but just wanted some commotion or for something dramatic to happen. He was still definitely a rabble-rouser. I loved him though, so eh. Take the good with the bad, I guess.

Michael's eyes widened in understanding and bopped a fist onto his open hand, "No, wait. The pool was about us? Damn! I wish I had a piece of that!"

Brooke's anger fizzled, as she her voice wobbled, "You would wager against our new relationship?" Don't put your foot in your mouth, Michael. Don't do it. Don't do it.

An amused looked amassed onto Michael's face, he shot her a look that clearly said 'duh', "Well, damn, Brooke! In a lifetime, how often do you have a run at a sure thing? Everyone fights; we were probably bound to, too." Foot in mouth. Damn. Silent chanting usually works for me.

Brooke's eyes burned as she huffed, before stomping away from him. Just before she slammed the door she yelled out, "Jerk!"

The customers that were left gaped, but when I turned my attention back to them, they swerved their eyes away. Was this how I lured in new people now, food and a show? Why didn't I let my friends hang out here again?

Steven leaned up against one of the baked good displays and muttered, "Well, that means game over."

Mabel sighed and stuck out her tongue, "Booo!"

Lee emerged from out of the bakery kitchen, flour covering his hands and his apron, "What was all the racket? Is something wrong?"

Eric shot him a look of triumph, "Oh no, Lee, that's just the sweet sound of me winning a sweet 300 bucks."

Fez picked up the bowl Annette had left at the counter and yanked it away from Eric. He shot him a chastising look, "Aha! Not so fast, cheater. Cheater, cheater pumpkin eater."

I strode over and fished out his ballot. I pursed my lips and nodded, "Yup. Says right here, . It's two minutes past 5 pm, which means you're just over when you said they'd fight. You bet 5 pm Thursday, Mr. Overconfident. Which still, means you lose."

Steven's eyes crinkled as he barked out a laugh, "Hah! Serves you right, Forman."

Mabel and Charlie snickered in the background. Lee rolled his eyes at their shenanigans and went back into the back. Maybe it was just more peaceful in the back.

A deep sigh escaped me as I shot him a disappointed glance, "Yeah, Eric. You just had to start them up today. They looked so happy before you had to stir up some shit."

Michael chipped in his two cents with a disgruntled grunt, "Yeah, man. I didn't even get in on this."

Irritation welled up in me and snapped, "Oh, shut up, Michael. Don't be a boob. You were a jerk too. Besides, it looks like the winner is R.F."

I took out the ballot and scrunched up my face as I turned the paper around, "Who's R.F.?" It couldn't be who I was thinking it could be? Could it?

Red popped up from behind us with an impish grin stuck on his face, "I believe this is mine. Thank you all very much." He plucked the ballot from my hands, with a self satisfied look.

Surprise surged into my voice before I could help it, "Mr. Forman!"

A soft smile pulled at his lips, making his eyes crinkle, "Hey, sweetheart. I'd like to use some of my winnings to get one of those hot chocolates. Oh! And a dark roast coffee, and a box of pastries? Kitty was craving chocolate."

Well. I didn't see that coming.

wvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvw

The theater was dark, with the wafting smell of sticky sodas, fresh popcorn and the musk that all old buildings shared. Our foot steps stuck now and again, and I pulled back the shiver that threatened to run down my spine. I hated sticky floors. I looked around and frowned. This didn't look the like movie we were supposed to watch.

I turned to him and pulled at his sleeve, before I whispered, "Puddin' pop, I think we're in the wrong theater."

Steven adjusted his glasses and peered past them for a moment before clicking his tongue, "Huh. Looks like Fez and Donna are here too, doll. I say we should stay and spy on them. That'll be apt entertainment enough, right?" A roguish grin pulled his lips up as he looked down at me.

My heart melted just a little at that look, and I nodded, "Intriguing plan."

I caught sight of some movement nearby us and pointed out, as I whispered, "Hey, is that Caroline creeping over there? We definitely have to stay now." I stole a nearby seat and leaned in. This would be too interesting to pass up.

Steven snorted as he joined in beside me, "Yeah. I think it is and we certainly do."

The whir of the projector started up and streamed a black and white film on the large screen in front of us. Ballerina's spluttered onto the screen. Ohhh. This was the movie Donna and Eric were supposed to go to.

Donna violently leaned back in her chair and grunted, "Okay. No one answered the phone at Eric's house. What could he be doing that's so important right now?"

Fez huffed and murmured, his voice stern, "Donna, when we're in public, you are with me. Eric is dead to you."

Caroline pushed past the few people that were sitting near them, and didn't even recognize us in the dark, "Excuse me. Pardon me. Move it!"

As she passed by us and moved closer to Donna and Eric, Steven rubbed his hands together and quietly sniggered, "Oh, boy. Here comes trouble. I love it."

I nodded and ate some popcorn. I hummed and whispered, "It is gonna be interesting to see what she does. Popcorn, puddin pop?"

"Thanks, doll," he gratefully took a handful and shoved it into his mouth.

Fez blinked rapidly as he let out a startled gasp, "Caroline." He took a decidedly long sip of his cola and chuckled, "I was just offering my girlfriend Donna a sip from my straw. We don't care about germs, because she has had her tongue in my mouth."

Caroline leaned into Fez's personal space and hissed, "You know what I think? I think this is all an act. I don't think you're really dating." She might've been crazy, but she was also pretty sharp.

Fez's eyes darted to the possible exits that this theater had before he gulped, "Oh, yeah? Well-Well, maybe- maybe this will convince you. Come on, Donna. Put some leg into it."

Donna crossed her arms and shot him an unimpressed look, "Give me a break, Fez."

Caroline sat back slightly, a smug look adorned her face, "If you were really together, you'd have at least gotten to second base by now."

Fez let his head slump down in defeat, "You know, when you are right, you are right."

Donna huffed and shot Caroline a pitying look, "All right, all right. Enough. Caroline, Fez doesn't like you."

Caroline's voice turned small, "Is that true, Fez?"

Fez let out a hesitant, "Yes." Was he afraid she was going to stab him or something? With all these witnesses?

A surprised and resigned look landed on Caroline's face, "Wow. I guess we really are over. Okay! Enjoy your movie." With a flick of a switch, a sunny smile was back onto her face, as she barged her way out of the theater.

She bumped into someone who was creeping down to Donna and Fez. He let out a sharp, "Ow."

Caroline shot him a whispered, "Sorry."

Eric popped his head up and waved her apology away, "It's okay."

She looked him up and down in his darkly garbed state before winking, "Hey, Eric. Lookin' good. Call me."

I snorted out a laugh as he edged closer to them, "What's Eric doing here of all places?"

Steven shrugged and threw an arm around me, "Stalking his girlfriend, I bet."

Eric stood beside them in the aisle with his arms crossed before taking the empty seat beside Donna.

She raised a brow at the sight of him and clicked her tongue, "Eric, what are you doing here?"

Eric let out a fake laugh, "Are you kidding me? It's The Turning Point. I love ballet movies. They make you think, you know? How did their feet get so pointy? That's a mystery I'm determined to solve. What?"

A soft smile enveloped Donna's face as she tugged on his arm, "You missed me."

Eric pulled his arm out her grip and threw it over her shoulders instead, "Well you missed me."

She tucked her head into his shoulder and hummed, "I really did."

Fez let out an irritated breath and poked Donna in the shoulder, "Excuse me. Our date is not over. Now, good day, sir." He waved his hands in Eric's direction in a shooing motion.

Donna rolled her eyes, "But, Fez-"

Fez shook his head and crossed his arms, "I said good day, Eric."

Eric raised a brow and firmly shook his head, "Fez, I'm not going anywhere."

With that, Fez huffed and stood up, "Fine. Then good day." He marched out of the aisle, unapologetic about who he bumped into, as he stalked out of the theater.

Donna called out, "Fez!"

With a last look over his shoulder, he threw her the bird and replied, "I said good day!"

Definitely better than the horror flick we were supposed to watch. Way more interesting.

wvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvwvw

Today was cooler than normal, which was a gift from God in my opinion. This week had just been too hot. A bit of rain would also be nice, but beggars can't be choosers. I peered up and squinted at the fluffy white clouds. There wasn't a hint of grey there. With a deep sigh, I tilted my head back to my mixing bowl. Sweet vanilla scents wafted around me, pulling a grin onto my face. God. I love baking.

Pursing my lips, I hissed a breath out past my teeth, a new worry nagged at the forefront of my brain. Slowly mixing my frosting, I hummed, "What if Steven doesn't like this cake? I need to get him to try this one again. He has a pretty good sense of taste on what's gonna be popular or good later on." Absently, I started mixing the frosting again, watching as the red food color faded into the vanilla frosting staining it into a soft pink.

Donna plopped her elbows onto my kitchen island and propped her head onto her clenched hands. She blew a stray hair out of her face with an irritated huff, "He's certainly not as boring as Eric. Eric would probably like a stupid boring cake."

I turned to look at Donna and raised a brow before I paused in my ministrations, "We're not talking about Eric." I frowned at the stormy expression that started to cloud her face.

She grit her teeth as she stared down at my kitchen island, "No, we're talking about Hyde. Untrustworthy, two-timing, sneaks-around- behind-your-back-and-reads-your-journal, Hyde."

I blinked repeatedly and reeled back slightly. Gripping my mixing bowl I slammed it down onto the kitchen island, making Donna jump back onto a stool. Bits of frosting flew onto my face, but I didn't care. I shot her a dark look, "Okay, Donna, I know we're not talking about my Steven. So what's actually bothering you?"

Inside, I started counting backwards from 10 and reminded myself that she was just projecting. She didn't meant to be a bitch. She was just lashing out a the nearest person she was by... Right?

Donna bit her lip and shot me a sheepish apologetic look, her cheeks flushed slightly. She glanced down at her clenched fists before barely meeting my gaze, "I'm sorry. It's just...Lin, I think Eric read my private journal." Her voice dropped off into a soft murmur, but it didn't hide the hurt in her voice.

Grabbing a nearby washcloth, I wiped away the sticky sweet frosting on my face, as tension leaked away from my shoulders. Air escaped from my nostrils, and with it my prior anger and irritation. A small smile tugged at my lips, "Ooohhh. Is this about the dream where you wished Eric was Steven Tyler?"

Donna had mentioned how she'd dreamed of her faux Eric in her dreams before a couple times. Steven Tyler Eric-ified or the other way around sometimes. Apparently it made him more exciting and passionate, at least in her mind. I never really talked to her more about it because it seemed kind of gross. Eric was my brother in all but blood, and I really didn't want to know about their sex life. Dreams or in reality, that shit was just weird.

An understanding look flitted across my face. I recalled how I, too, had similar strange dreams. Where sometimes the person I was with, wasn't Steven. Usually though, I would gain control in the middle and stop myself from doing whatever I was doing with that person. It always left me feeling a little strange and bad. I never liked those dreams. Certainly not how Donna seemed to enjoy hers, anyway.

Donna let her head fall back as she let out a loud, yet relieved, "Yes!" She flopped her head back and shot me a grateful look, "Gahd! I knew you'd understand. Apparently, dumb sleazy Eric can't!"

I held myself back from telling her that I didn't think our dreams ran in the same vein, but I put on my most supportive face, "Oh dear." Reaching over, I awkwardly patted her shoulder. Her mouth twitched into a small smile.

A weary sigh escaped her as she seemed to slump onto the kitchen island. Even though she wasn't as angry as before, irritation seemed to still spark off of her, "Yeah. Now he's all upset, but he has no right to be since it was my privacy that he freaking violated. So what if I thought that! Right!?"

I tilted my head at her as I finished mixing up the frosting for my latest cake. Biting my lip, I nodded and began icing on the cake I was working on, "Yeah. I understand that. I think that he might've had some qualms to being thought of as not enough, though."

If Steven had ever found out about my strange dreams, I knew he would certainly feel like he'd done something to make me think he wasn't, at the very least, adequate enough for my dream self. As if we had any real control over our dreams. I inwardly snorted at that thought.

Donna pursed her lips like a duck, a pout slowly formed on her face, "He's not not enough. He's perfect the way he is, most of the time. Can you fault me for wanting a little edge and danger?"

Deftly turning my cake, I frosted the last little bit of my cake before shrugging, "I guess I can see your- Eric, what the hell?" I backed up into my counter as my kitchen door slammed open. My heart thudded in my chest, the frosting spatula splattered pink frosting across my apron, and luckily missed everything else.

Relief blew into me at the sight of Steven's irritated form coming out from behind the now drunkenly slumping Eric. I gently placed down my frosting covered spatula onto the counter and moseyed on over to them.

Steven shot Eric an irritated glare, jabbing an accusing finger in his direction, "You just kicked my door open, Forman. If it's broken, you're paying."

I brushed past him throwing a chastising look over my shoulder, "Eric, for shame." I turned to Steven and tiptoed, slinging my arms around his neck, I murmured, a smile dimpled my face, "Hi there, handsome."

He brushed his lips against mine before pulling back with a smirk, "Hey, doll." Steven glanced at the tall cake that stood on the kitchen island, "Is that the 30 layer rainbow crepe cake? 30 layers is quite a jump from your last crepe cake."

I nuzzled his neck and happily hummed, "Mhmm."

Steven let out a rough chuckle, warm breath tickling my ear, "It looks absolutely delectable. Just like you."

Heat rushed to my face, my smile dimpled my cheeks, "Awe, you!"

Too inebriated to pay attention to us, Eric honed in onto Donna, "Hey! I got a surprise for you, Donna!" His words slurred, but his grin was bright.

Donna slowly took in this side of Eric, growing distaste bloomed on her face, "What?"

She'd told me before about how she'd never really liked people when they were blackout drunk. This might've actually been the first time Eric was like this though. I wonder what triggered it. It couldn't have been just the offer to drink because even then, he'd be aware enough to not get this wasted.

Steven turned his eyes towards Eric, giving him a narrowed gimlet glare, "Oh yeah... The hell man! You don't just go barging into people's houses, breaking doors and shit." A scowl perched up onto his face. He hated it when people destroyed or threw away his stuff. It was probably because of how his mom's new boyfriends kept doing that, for either shits and giggles, or just out of anger. I'd hate it if someone did that to me too.

Pursing my lips in distaste, I muttered, "Are they ignoring us?"

Eric continued on, grabbing at Donna's shoulders, he did his best to focus on her face, "Donna. Doooonna. Donna. I- I got a tattoo. Guess where. No don't. Ish- ish on- On my butt. Right here!" Suddenly letting her go, he slapped his ass, a proud smirk on his face.

Steven rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue, "I'll take that as a yes." I sighed into his neck, my arms loosening slightly. Steven tightened his hold around my waist when I started to let go, I raised my brow, a silent question as to what he was up to.

He shrugged and with a grunt pulled me up, which caused me to reflexively wrap my legs around his waist. I blew a raspberry at his face. He let out a deep chuckle, "Might as well be comfortable while they have their cat fight, doll."

"Fine, but I wanna sit on the island counter," I pouted at him, my arms still loose around his neck.

"Deal. Let's keep watching this shit show," with that he drifted over to the island counter and gently deposited me down. With a gentle peck on the lips, we continued to watch Donna and Eric ignore us.

Donna glared at him, an incredulous look forming on her face, "What the hell!? Why? Why, would you do something like that Eric? Tattos are forever. And on your ass?"

Eric humfed and shook a finger at Donna like she was naughty child, "Because I'm dangerous, lady. D-A-N-GEROUS."

I made a face and waved my hand in front of my nose, "And drunk. You positively reek of booze. What'd you guys do earlier, Steven?"

He shrugged and pulled me closer, "We hung out with my manager Leo. He gave us some sake and did the whole tattoo thing. Just so you know, Eric went under the needle willingly. Neither of us had to convince him to."

An exasperated breath escaped me, "Steve. He's never had sake before. And, really I wish one of you would've convinced him not to."

A roll of his eyes and another blase shrug was his answer, "What can you do?"

Still oblivious to our conversation, Donna took in a deep breath. With a seemingly serene face, she gently smiled at her drunk boyfriend, "Eric, I want you to be honest with me, and I promise I won't get mad. Did you read my journal?"

Not knowing the danger he was in, Eric blinked and slowly nodded, "Um, yeah."

In an instant, Donna's smile disappeared as she socked his arm, "You sneaky little dill-hole!" A scowl overcame her face as she glared Eric down.

Eric scowled back, rubbing his now sore arm, "No! No, Donna. You know who's sneaky? People who go around writing their feelings in their journals and not telling their boyfriends what they feel. So, you know what? I'm not sorry."

Donna now looked outraged, "I'm so sorry. You want to know how I feel? Fine. I'll tell you how I feel." I could practically hear her teeth grind at this rate.

I cringed at the oncoming argument,"I feel like they really shouldn't be arguing here in our kitchen."

Steven rolled his eyes and snorted, "I doubt that they'd notice us around and watching them, Lin. They both look too incensed to give a fuck."

Donna whipped out a small book that had been jammed into her back pocket. Flipping through the pages, she cleared her throat and read out loud, "Yesterday at lunch I was looking at Eric when he didn't know it and I just couldn't believe how much I love him and how lucky I am to be with him... Why couldn't you read that page?!" Her cheeks were tinged pink, and her eyes were getting a watery sheen to them. Damn. I hope she wasn't about to cry. Ugh.

Eric took a step back, his frown softened, "Because you came back, look Donna, look, I'm really sorry, but, you know, it's just sometimes I get worried, you know?" At this point, it seemed like all the anger that had been inflating him up like a parade balloon was finally escaping.

Blinking rapidly, she grit her teeth once more, "Well, you know what? Suck it up. Eric, these are my private thoughts, and I'm allowed to have them. You have to stop trying to be what you think I want you to be and just, like, be yourself."

A beat of silence passed by before he slowly started nodding his head, "Okay. I think I'm gonna go."

As he turned around, she grabbed onto his wrist, "Well, wait. Show me your tattoo."

His cheeks flushed, as he gently pried her hand away, "Yeah. I think you're really gonna like it. Just don't be mad if it says, 'Debbie.'"

With the threat of seeing Eric's ass, Steven whistled with one hand, and hollered, "Okay. Hey! You shit heads. Hi."

Eric blinked in surprise at the sight of us, "Oh, hi you guys. When'd you get here?"

Steven's eye twitched and I smothered the laughter that built up into my chest with a snort.

Donna frowned, confusion apparent on her face, "Were you guys here the whole time?"

At that question, I raised a brow. Waving my hand around like a girl showing off a car, I tilted my head, "It is our house. So, you two wanna do that in my backyard instead of here? Cause I don't think we really want to see that side of Eric. Like at all."

Flushing slightly, Eric shot me an apologetic look, "Oh yeah. Yeah. Sure. Sure. Donna?" He bit his lip, nerves making him scrunch up his nose.

Donna's face softened into a small sheepish smile, "Yeah. Sorry about all that guys."

I waved away her apology. I knew how it was when an argument would boil over like this. Sometimes it was hard to notice anyone else. Didn't mean that it was a good thing though. I shot her a forgiving grin, "No, sweat Big Red."

The duo clasped hands and shuffled out of our house. Letting my forehead fall onto Steven's shoulder I perked my ears to listen in.

"So now that we're here in their backyard. Show me," Donna sounded a touch impatient.

Eric audibly gulped, "Okay. What do you think?"

A bark of laughter sounded out, "Woodstock."

He let out a shocked shriek, "It says 'Woodstock'?!"

Giggles sounded out not long after, "No, it's a picture of Snoopy's friend Woodstock. You have a little yellow bird on your ass."

We both snorted in laughter. Our evenings were never boring with those two in our lives.

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The birds were singing in the trees, squirrels ran up along the telephone lines and crows cawed now and again. Warm sunlight bathed us as we lounged in my backyard. Condensation dripped down the pitcher of lemonade between Donna and I. It was nice to relax like this now and again. I also appreciated the cold breeze that blew by now and again. It probably helped we were both in bikini's. Ahhh. This day was turning out to be pretty nice.

With a sudden slam, my gate was thrown open. Annette whirled in, her smile was so big, I though that it would crack her face. Heavily breathing and bouncing up and down she shrieked, "Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Girls Glamourella Modeling Agency got the pictures I sent in. They want me to audition! My dream is finally coming true!"

Taking a sip of my lemonade, I pulled my sunglasses down to get a better look at my wayward friend, "I thought your dream was to be the world's first flying lady scientist."

Donna peered over her magazine, "Or an international singing cheerleader."

She huffed, crossing her arms. Shooting us both a condensing look, she rolled her eyes, "No, Lin. No, Donna. Those were dreams I had, not my present dream."

A deep sigh escaped me as I put my drink beside the pitcher. Settling further into my seat, I flipped my sunglasses back onto my face, "You're a weird little girl."

With careful fingers, Donna flipped over a page and muttered, "Yeah, you really are, Annie."

A little miffed off that we weren't giving her the attention she felt she deserved, Annette stomped her foot, "You guys come on! If I become a model, I wouldn't have to work, or study, or even think ever again!"

At that statement, I snorted out a laugh, "That's great. I mean, what's thought done for anyone anyway?"

Donna snickered and kept flipping through her magazine.

Stomping over to stand between us, Annette put her hands on her hips and glared down at us, "Nothing! But modeling has made people rich and famous. Come on ladies! We're going to the world modeling headquarters!"

I sat up, a frown flickering onto my face, "That's all the way in Madison, Annette. That's quite a ways, away. Plus neither of us are dressed."

A pout pulled up on to her face, desperation shined in her eyes, "Well, you have a car and it is the weekend, Lin. What's the harm in an adventure? And, you both said you guys wanted to dress up a little this weekend for some girly fun last week. Come on. Pleeeease?"

I bit my lip, and slowly nodded before turning to Donna, "True…you do make a good point. Donna, what do you think?"

Letting her magazine fall onto her naked stomach, she hummed, "Well, the boys did exclude us from their trip to Canada today. And it's not like we can't sunbathe later..."

Annette seemed to bubble with anticipation, "So? Is that an okay?"

With a yawn and a stretch, I shrugged, "Fine, Annette. We can go."

Letting out a squeal, she pulled us off our chairs into a too warm hug, "Yay!"

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The building we walked into was sleek, shiny, and very much air conditioned. I was glad that we'd changed into something warmer than our bikini's. I still felt a little under dressed in my jeans and t-shirt when I spotted all the people that walked around us wearing grey tailored suits. This place looked nice, but didn't really give off the vibe of a modeling agency. Wouldn't models and their agents dress nicer than just grey suits?

A tall blonde with a beehive updo, strode over to us. Her red, impossibly high, high heels click clacked, giving me the impression of a lady trying to be like the devil wears Prada, but not quite getting there. Giving us all a look from head to toe, she raised a brow not even offering any of us a handshake, "Hello. I'm Michelle Ray, President of Glamourella International. And you must be?"

Annette smoothed down her too tight dress, and stuttered, "I'm Annette Macy. Well, Annie Macy, I mean."

She looked down at her clipboard before looking back at Annette, a bored look painted on her face, "Annie Macy?"

Annette gulped, her hands clenched and unclenched by her dress, "Exactly."

She tilted her head, and tapped a dark red finger nail on the clipboard, "And you are here for?"

Annette took a deep breath in and straightened her back, "My audition."

Miss Ray pursed her lips, "Your audition." A slight bit of confusion clouded her face, before it cleared into the bored face we'd initially seen. Something was fishy.

Annette resolutely nodded, "Yes. Exactly."

She flicked her eyes over to us, "And you two must be?"

I raised a brow, "I'm-"

Annette suddenly patted my shoulder, cutting me off with a strained smile, she widened her eyes up at the imposing woman, "Shush. Yeah, no they don't matter for this." She waved a hand, her nerves clearly strained.

I let out an amused snort. As imposing as this lady was, she didn't really seem that official to me. Sure, her clothes were nice, but that didn't automatically make a lady, or a dude, the head of anything. Plus, I found it odd that we just happened to bump into the head honcho of this agency at the first floor. Didn't those types of folks always have their offices at the top of buildings like this?

Donna rolled her eyes and huffed under her breath.

With another assessing look, Miss Ray circled Annette, "Okay. Let's start."

Annette straightened even further, and nodded as demurely as she could,"Sure. Let's do it."

Looking up and down at Annette's profile as she circled her like a shark, Miss Ray hummed and kept glancing at her clipboard, "Okay. Mm-hmm."

Donna cleared her throat and hummed in a slightly mocking tone under her breath, "Uh-huh."

Pausing once she was back in front of Annette, she tapped a finger against her dark red lips, "Good. Now, Let's see the hair."

Annette flipped her hair over her shoulder like an expert in hair advertisement. It clicked in my head why she'd been doing that repeatedly last week. I had initially thought she'd gone crazy, but this was a interesting alternative answer to that.

Crinkling her eyes, and smiling like a shark, she waved her hand down at Annette's form, "Well, you are a remarkable talent."

Annette jumped up and down, unable to hold in her squeals of delight.

Miss Ray shot her a strange look as she she raised a brow, "Are those your real teeth?"

Baring her teeth in a wide grin, Annette happily nodded, "Yes! Yes, they are."

Miss Ray looked down at her clipboard again before shooting her a slimy smile, "Great. Well, welcome to the superior world of modeling."

Annette clutched her chest and gushed, "Oh my God. Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Slightly taken aback at Annette's enthusiasm, she clucked her tongue before that slimy smile came back, "Sure. Now-" She cleared her throat and gave Annette an appraising look, "You're going to need to cover a few costs."

Annette's face fell, before she seemed to pick herself back up, "Of course. Oh, you know, I left my checkbook at home. Um, can I come by tomorrow?"

Miss Ray made a face, scrunching her nose in displeasure, "Oh, tomorrow." With a big theatrical sigh, she shook her head, "No. No. Tomorrow I'll be in Paris, you know, for the big show. You know how it is."

Determination filled Annette's eyes, "No, no, no. It's okay. I'll bring it by tonight."

Her smile turned sharp as she looked down at her clipboard before sending a sickeningly sweet look at Annette, "Good. Administrative costs are $200."

Annette duitifully nodded, "Uh-huh."

She tapped her clipboard again, "Publicity shots are $150. And we're gonna need money for beauty supplies-"

By this point, I'd had enough. Loudly clearing my throat, I cut her off, "Mmkay. Wait. Hold on. Are you an agent or a saleslady?"

Shooting me a plastic smile, she pleasantly replied, "Oh, I'm an agent. I represent models like Cheryl Tiegs."

Donna let out a disbelieving snort, "You represent Cheryl Tiegs?"

Miss Ray tutted, wagging her forefinger, "No. Models like Cheryl Tiegs."

A deep frown furrowed my face before I pulled on a strained smile, "I see. Annette. A moment, please? Over there."

Oblivious to what was really happening, Annette amicably nodded, "Sure, Lin. What's on your mind?"

As we all marched into a far off corner near what I believed to be a ficus, I hissed under my breath, "Annette, can't you see? This is a scam. Like a big scam." I crossed my arms, impatiently tapping my foot.

Donna gently gazed down at Annette, a frown tugged her lips down, "This woman is just tryin' to make fast money off you, Annie. Seriously."

Annette's perfectly plucked brows rose up to her hairline. Letting out breath through her teeth, she rolls her eyes, "Donna, she deserves her cut, and Lin, this is so not a scam. She discovered a remarkable talent. Don't hate me 'cause I'm beautiful." With a flip of her hair, she shot us both disappointed glares.

I puffed out my cheeks and shook my head, "Annette, I pity you because right now you're being really dumb. And you're usually not this dumb."

Donna made a face and muttered under her breath, "Yeah, more dumb than usual."

I clucked my tongue and shot Donna a chastising look. She shrugged her shoulders and smiled unapologetically.

I sighed and listed off what fees the so called 'agent' had said were required, off of my fingers, "Administrative fees? Publicity shots? Beauty packages? All at once. That you have to pay for right this instant. No forms, no contracts, and nothing about getting a job. It's a scam, besides that, there's no proof that she even is an agent. She could just be some weirdo off the street looking to fleece people of this hard earned cash."

Annette huffed and stomped down her foot, "This is the most important thing that's ever happened to me, and you two are trying to ruin it. Just! Ugh. Just, please, don't butt in." Her protest came out more as a whine rather than an accusation.

Donna waved her hands in a pacifying manner, "Look, Annie, I'm sorry, but-"

Annette snapped her fingers and shook her head, "And to think I was gonna make you both my assistants." With that, she huffed away, walking back towards the agent.

I choked out a laugh and shook my head. I'd rather not work for someone again, thanks. I had enough of that in my last life. Besides, this whole thing really screamed 'scam' to me. Too many things didn't line up.

Donna looked at Annette's retreating back, a wary sigh escaping her, "We gotta go after her."

Pursing my lips like a duck, I nodded, "I know, Donna." If we didn't, she'd probably get fleeced for everything she had in her bank account.

With a slight chuckle, Donna poked my cheek, startling me out of my thoughts, "Well come on, shorty."

Rolling my eyes, I followed after my Amazonian friend, "This is so stupid."

Donna shrugged, and snorted, "Don't need to tell me twice."

Once we walked over to Annette and Miss Ross, we heard her offering to sell Annette another thing she didn't need. She shot Annette a shark like smile, "Our nail care package is optional, but if you're really serious-"

Annette breathlessly smiled, and shook her head, "Oh- Oh, I am. I am fully committed to both fame and fortune."

If this were a cartoon, Miss Ross's eyes would've become dollar signs at that sentence. It certainly seemed that way when she looked down at Annette, "You are going places. That'll be another $200 then."

Annette bounced on her heels, "Excellent."

Stalking over, I tapped the faux devil wears Prada lady. She looked down at me, a pinched look on her face, "Hi, I'm Michelle Ray."

I raised a brow, "Yeah. I know. We were just here."

She waved off my comment, "Of course you two were."

Annette turned towards us and hissed, "I told you two to stay out of it, you dream killers."

With a roll of my eyes and a patient sigh, I held my temper down, "Annette, we're here for you."

Donna, seeing my patience thin, butted in, "And, as a matter of fact we've decided to be models too."

With wide eyes, Annette stared at the two of us before dissolving into a sing song type of laughter, "Oh, Donna, you're so funny! Donna, you're gonna need $200 for publicity costs. I know you don't have the money for that. Maybe Lin, but not you. "

Donna scowled, her good will dwindling.

Miss Ross, clucked her tongue, tapping her blasted clipboard once more, "That's true, and then you two would need administrative fees."

Annette shot Miss Ross a glare, "Wait, wait. You didn't even ask them to shake their hair!" Her mounting irritation was palpable at this point.

She raised a brow at Annette, before giving us both an appraising look, "Oh, yeah. If you two would? Please shake your hair."

I flicked my hair over my shoulder, giving the faux agent a bland look.

Donna flicked a hair out of her face in defiance to her request.

A sickly sweet smile spread across her face, "You are both such remarkable talents."

Annette put her hand up and growled, "Wait, wait, wait! You think Donna here can be a model? Seriously? Maybe Lin. Cause she's, like, cute in a kicked puppy way, but Donna? This is a scam. How dare you soil the pure and noble art of modeling!?" She jabbed an accusing finger at Miss Ross.

Miss Ross's eyes narrowed, before her slimy smile came back, "I like your passion. Have you ever considered acting?"

Like someone flicking a light switch, Annette's eyes brightened, "Oh, my God. That's my other dream!"

Now thoroughly irritated with this entire farce, I barked out, "Jesus. We're going home, Annette. Thanks for your time, Miss, but we'll be going now."

With Donna's help, we dragged Annette away from that shark of a woman. Although, mid way through our walk back to my car, she'd stopped struggling.

As we drove away from the tall shiny building of lies, a comfortable silence grew in the car. Wind whipped through the windows and the sounds of the city surrounded us as I drove further down the street.

Not too long on our drive, Annette cleared her throat. Sheepishly, she murmured, "Thanks you guys, for looking out for me."

Making sure not to take my eyes off the road for too long, I threw her a smile over my shoulder, "Sure."

Donna's irritation slowly seeped away as she shrugged, "Don't mention it, Annie."

A beat of silence sat between us again, before Annette broke it once more, "And I've thought about it, and you two could be models. Not like cover models, but like, models."

Now paying more attention to the scenery that we were passing by, Donna murmured, "Hmm. Thanks, Annie."

Chuckling slightly while I turned down onto a main street, I hummed, "Mhmm. Thanks Annette."

With a flick of her wrist Donna turned on the radio to a blue grass station. Idly, I wondered

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AN: Thank you to everyone that favorited, followed, read, and reviewed. I'm grateful that you guys have stuck with this story still. A quadruple dose of thanks to those that reviewed. Y'all are fantastic.

I'm so sorry that this came out so late, but I'm dealing with some health problems right now that make it hard to do much of anything these days. In addition to that, I'm finding it rather difficult to churn out massive chapters so in the future they'll be shorter than the ones at the beginning. It might be the answer to helping me finish this story at a more consistent rate. After this is done, I do plan on reformatting it so that the chapter lengths aren't all wonky.

The next chapter will get a bit of Steven POV, so that should be fun.

NightlyKill: I'm so happy that you love this story! c: It's going to be awkward and kind of fun to watch.

BlueSky777: I'm glad. I totally agree. I hate how they basically stripped all the growth from the characters once they switched writers on Season 8. Now as for your questions. Hyde in this universe isn't and wasn't a prude before Lin, but he didn't get far enough for actual penetration with anyone but her. He's also already asked for Red and Kitty's permission to date Lin back in chapter 1. It was a scene I didn't include because Lin was unaware of what he had done.

Darkest Nightingale: Thank you so much! I'm glad that you love this story so far. c:

Sophie-M: Donna's parents aren't going to split up in this universe. There won't be a Joanne for Bob here, sorry. She probably will over time, especially as somethings are revealed later on in the story. You're right. They basically are.

BlueSky777: If there's enough people rooting for Fez and Laurie instead of Fez and Annette, I don't see why not. I'm still waffling as to who will end up with Fez in this universe, so why not?

NoWarningShots: You're very welcome. I'm glad that you like my story and the premise so far. c: