[Hux]

Eyes shut or not, Hux didn't sleep for the entirety of the first watch. He lay on the floor listening to the obnoxious sounds of the former supreme leader getting it on with the Jedi in the rear compartment and the combined sounds of more than a dozen other beings sleeping in close proximity. One of the aliens snored (his money was on the one that had assaulted him) and at least one of the stormtroopers if his sense of direction was any good.

Poe's breaths were light and relaxed, only audible because he was no more than an arm's length away. At least Ren's coupling didn't last especially long, though Hux couldn't make sense of it aside from some initial raised voices, a long silence, and then a cry, a few heavy thumps, and more subdued noises. He would have greatly preferred not to have heard any of it. Ren couldn't have joined up with the Resistance more than a few days prior and to think he'd already found someone who wanted him that way was atrocious.

Then again, there was the matter of Dameron.

First shift sent out the Resistance member first to wake their replacement, then the stormtrooper emerged in armor and woke the second member of the watch. The first stormtrooper took off his armor. The second one put his on. Although they tried to hold down the clatter, the sleeping sounds died down considerably during this transition. It was enough of a disturbance to wake people, but knowing what was going on, they kept quiet and returned to slumber.

But not Hux. He wasn't trying to stay awake. He just felt uneasy and his mind wouldn't stop. The first sergeant had allocated plenty of time for everyone, even those who stood watch, to get a full night's sleep. Obviously (and correctly in his view), she was prioritizing everyone being well-rested for their next day over any benefits of early rising. There was no telling where the Resistance was in their day cycle anyway. His thoughts spun away to considering this sun's transit time and deciding it indicated a cycle of twenty to twenty-two hours, followed by the various ways he could test and refine this assumption.

He really needed to sleep. The planet was going to spin with or without his calculations. His head was aching again and at this point, he was eating into his own allocation of sleep. The Order needed him- Well, he needed to be well-rested. As the second shift stretched on, he closed his eyes and tried various breathing exercises and mantras. He tried meditating. He tried- It worked.

For how long, he didn't know. He dreamed. His crew was lined up – all the people who had confessed to knowing him on some level while in the First Order. One after another, they were going to be killed. Gruesomely. Brendol was laughing at him from inside the same bacta tank he'd inhabited the last time Hux had seen him, when he'd been dying from Phasma's poison. But now he had reconstituted himself somehow and was ordering the deaths of those in front of him.

Hux was going to feel every death. Somehow he knew that the better he knew a particular person, the more he'd feel as they were killed. He felt their pain. He felt their terror. He heard Brendol telling them, whispering directly into their mind like Snoke had occasionally done: Call out for Armitage Hux. Call out for your general who abandoned you in your hour of need. Call out to him and if he answers, you will be spared.

Hux realized he was already there, lurking in the shadows. He could end this just by stepping out. Step out and reveal himself? Another person died. It was a pang, but he didn't even know their name. They had said they knew him without knowing exactly what Brendol meant. Everyone in the First Order knew him at least somewhat. This might take a very long time.

A new person was led up. Hux recognized her immediately. Unamo – Chief Petty Officer Nastia Unamo, who had served with him on the bridge of the Finalizer for years. He was going to feel this one, and strongly.

Kill her very slowly, Brendol said, looking in the direction of the shadows where Hux hid like the coward he was. He recoiled, feeling like a boy facing his overbearing father, knowing Rae Sloane was nowhere near to ward him off. He whimpered and flinched as Unamo was burned and shocked. She screamed in the background as he covered his mouth. He tried not to scream as well, knowing how important it was to stay hidden.

"Hey. Hey." It was a soft voice, incongruous with what was playing out in his mind. "Hux. Hux?" It was the hand that woke him. Poe's closed over his, which wasn't at his mouth as he'd thought but lying on the mat in front of him. Hux gasped and jerked, finding himself trapped by a firm grip. Poe held on only a second, but it was enough of a pause that Hux didn't draw his knife or do anything else unnecessary.

Poe withdrew his hand as Hux panted. His heart was beating too fast. He tucked his hands protectively across his chest and tried to make himself small. How much noise had he been making? The room had fallen nearly silent again. Not even the alien was snoring (although the stormtrooper was dutifully making up for it, so not everyone had woken to witness his distress).

"It's okay," Poe said softly. "It was just a nightmare." Deliberately, Poe extended his hand again, making three distinct swipes against the edge of the floor mat just as he had before. It took Hux a moment to realize what he was doing – that he was offering or asking for contact. Hux reached out hesitantly, sliding his hand into Poe's and trusting him not to use it to yank him forward or bind him. Poe squeezed lightly a few times and let their joined hands settle to the mat.

Hux's breaths deepened as the terror and shame receded. His skin prickled with phantom pain, but he refused to accept it as real. Instead, he rubbed his thumb across Poe's hand – that was real. Poe squeezed and relaxed his grip, a gradual press that involved stroking his fingers along the bottom of Hux's hand. He wasn't being mocked or coddled. He didn't know why Poe was doing this, but Hux liked it. He sighed, then moved his fingers forward to find the delicate skin of the inside of Poe's wrist. He liked it a lot.

"Mmm," Poe gave a pleased hum.

"Too loud," Hux said. Although he said it quietly, someone in the room made a noise suspiciously like a snort or a choked laugh. He wasn't even sure which side of the compartment it came from. Embarrassment came flooding back, thinking about how he'd felt overhearing Ren's noises. He pulled his hand away.

Poe pulled in air as though to object, but to Hux's relief, he didn't speak. He touched the mat again, this time a simple pattern of tapping three times. Hux ignored him and squeezed his eyes shut, but then became concerned he couldn't see the room. So he rolled over, but that put his back to everyone. He sat up, knees drawn up to his chest and his arms wrapped around them, back to the wall, and fondled the knife scabbard on his forearm through the fabric of his shirt.

The feelings from the dream swirled in his head and shivered against his skin. By now, Unamo's torture would be nearing its end and here he was touching hands with some filthy Resistance member to distract himself from it. But that was just a nightmare, right? It couldn't be real. Could it? And what if it was? There was nothing he could do about it if it was. His breath caught in an unexpected sob.

Poe propped himself up on his elbow. "Hux?"

He got control of himself. "Go to sleep. That's an order." He didn't want to pull rank, most of all because his ability to enforce it was tenuous at best, but he didn't know how else to deal with what was going on for him. CL-0745 rolled over so she was facing Poe's back, so maybe there was some enforcement capability after all, loathe though Hux was to use it.

Poe didn't push it. He lowered himself back to the deck and did a good act of going to sleep.

Hux rested his forehead on his knees and tried to stay focused on the here and now, blocking out thoughts of anything else. If it were true, then Darth Sidious was trying to break him. If it were not, then there was no reason to waste his energy obsessing about it. Either way, his best path was to ignore it.

He didn't think he dozed, but the swishing open of the door to the forward compartment caught him by enough surprise that he must have. He was sweaty and trembling. There had been others after Unamo. He shook it off. Or tried. He felt the way one would if in formation and the drill sergeant was blowing the brains out of troopers at random, while you were required to stay at attention. Hux was disciplined. But it was hard.

From the lit chamber within emerged the slick-skinned alien. C'ai, he'd been called, and Hux had overheard others using 'he' to refer to it. If he had been on watch, then no wonder Hux hadn't heard the beast's snoring. It was a small solace. Maybe his nightmare hadn't been noticed by everyone.

Hux watched as the thing went to one of the Rebels and shook her awake. It was Kaydel. He didn't know if that was a first or last name, only that it was the one Rey had told him. She got to her feet, stretched, and limped to the forward compartment. The alien went to his designated sleeping area.

A few moments later, a stormtrooper emerged with another swish of the door. Hux intercepted him. "I'll take next watch."

He was well trained enough not to pause before saying, "Yes sir."

"Which one stands the watch after - the one I'll need to wake?"

"Fifth from the back, sir." The trooper pointed. "H-482. The one who snores."

That was plenty of identification. "Dismissed." Hux went inside.

Kaydel looked at him with wide eyes. "I thought it was all going to be troopers who stood watch for the Order."

"I can't sleep. I might as well." He slid into the pilot's seat. It was more comfortable than sitting on the floor, folded in on himself. He looked across the various controls. Everything was off other than environmental controls and short range scanners. The scanners were showing a little more resolution than he'd seen earlier, but they weren't what he'd call functional. There didn't seem to be much to do aside from stare out into the darkness.

A variety of local arthropods (or perhaps they were insects) were on the viewport, probably attracted by the light, even though it was at no more than fifty percent in this compartment. Of the three different types he saw, he wasn't sure which was the type that had scrabbled against his neck earlier. They made his skin crawl to look at them. Or maybe that was a lingering effect of his dreams.

To distract himself, Hux asked his companion, "What … name am I to call you by?"

"Kaydel."

He nodded. The door behind them opened again.

It was Poe. Poe said to Kaydel, "I can take this watch if you want to get some sleep."

She scoffed, but rose. "The hard floor beckons."

Hux said, "You, um …" She stopped and looked to him. "My … The sleeping pad isn't being used."

"I'm on it." She left.

He breathed out when the door shut behind her. Poe was still standing. Hux blinked up at him, remembering the hug, lying next to each other looking at the stars, touching in the dark. It sounded very romantic. They were stranded out here, he was in charge, and he didn't have time for 'romance,' but he really wanted … something. Something Poe seemed to be offering. Hux didn't have the words or concepts to express it, but his expression must have said something on its own.

Poe stepped closer and raised his hand slowly, as though half-expecting Hux to pull away. He didn't. Poe moved forward and gently, carefully, ran his fingers along Hux's hair. It was probably disorderly. The gel was coming out of it. Hux doubted there was any in the ship's supplies. He'd combed it before turning in, but of course it was mussed again. A soft smile turned Poe's lips.

He curled his hand and let his knuckles barely graze Hux's temple, then down his cheek to his jaw. As his hand moved forward to Hux's chin, it rotated so his fingertips were touching him. Hux shivered in want. He breathed out roughly and his skin heated. He pulled his face away. "You … You should take your seat."

In a voice that was awed, Poe said, "I am really digging how into me you are."

Hux turned back to him, brows upturned. He desperately didn't want to be alone. He wanted another embrace. He was too vulnerable, too needy, too weak and he knew it. As Poe obviously knew as well.

"Yeah." Poe nodded even though Hux had said nothing. "That." Poe finally went to the other seat, for which Hux was thankful.

"You have … been kind to me. And interested."

Poe sat and turned the chair halfway toward him. He seemed about to say something flippant, then changed to, "You've had that combination before, right?"

Hux gave a rueful smile and looked out at the darkness. "No. You are," he glanced back, "interested, correct?" His voice betrayed his insecurity more than he wanted it to, but he was tired and they were alone.

"Oh yeah," Poe answered with a smirk and a throaty rumble. "I'm interested. Very much so. I've never had anyone blush so much for me."

Which of course triggered another one. Hux sighed disconsolately and tried to hide it by wiping at his gritty eyes. It didn't work, but at least he wasn't looking at Poe grinning at him.

"It's amazing," Poe said. "And flattering."

"Under other circumstances, you must know, I would have you strung up on an interrogation rack." And he had, which made this doubly strange. At some point, he would need to question Poe's motives, but for now Hux was too distracted by enjoying Poe's interest, regardless of where it came from. It felt like a lifeline.

Poe's expression did some odd things – concern, soberness, humor, then his own blush. "Under the right circumstances, I might not mind."

Hux blinked at him, trying to work out what he meant. Poe's voice implied something indecent. Hux pursed his lips and stared out at the dark again, remembering rumors and innuendo about an officer sexually using prisoners. Brendol had said the accusations were baseless and even if true, irrelevant. Was that what Poe meant? But … he wouldn't mind? Hux pinched the bridge of his nose. His eyes were itchy. He hoped he could make sense of this after some rest. When he could think. When his head didn't hurt.

He turned to stare out at a fist-sized pill bug currently struggling and failing to climb the apparently too-slippery view port. He felt a prickle along his spine. Someone had called out to him. He didn't answer. He studied the bug instead. It seemed to be suctioning off the tree goop that had smeared the ship during their crash, but it couldn't get to the stuff higher up.

"You're a really by-the-book kind of guy, aren't you?" Poe asked after a long pause.

"Yes." Poe had his attention again.

"So tell me," Poe went on, "how do we do this by-the-book?"

"Do what?"

"Are you interested? You didn't say."

Hux sighed and looked away. "I thought you said you could tell."

"I can. I want to hear it. Are you?"

He rubbed at his eyes again. "There is no way to do this … by-the-book. I don't know." He sighed. "Wait." Poe did. There was nothing else to do. Hux shook his head. "I don't know … that the First Order regulations even matter. But that may be just … fatalism."

"Well. Okay. But it's what you grew up with so even if it's gone, it's still in your head. So how do people in the First Order date?"

"You want to date me?"

"Uh-huh."

"That's ridiculous."

"Trust me," Poe smiled. "I know. But tell me about it just hypothetically, between any two officers."

"It would have to be between officers."

"Why's that? Stormtroopers don't date?"

"No." Hux chuckled at how silly that was. "Of course not."

"How do you stop them? It's biology. Basic drives. They can't turn it off any more than you can."

"Oh?" Hux raised his brows at Poe.

Poe blinked, then jerked his head to look at the closed hatch to the main compartment, then back to Hux. "That explains what Rose … You neuter them somehow. How? What do you do? Is it reversible? Can he fix it?"

"You mean Finn?"

"Yes! I mean Finn." There was an urgency in Poe's tone.

Hux gave him a less than impressed look for his strong tone, but on the other hand, he had to respect Poe's loyalty to his friends. "It is reversible. The hormonal regulation is through the food. Unless he's acquired some other form of contraceptive in the meantime, it should be fading and his 'basic drives' as you put them should be resurfacing."

"How long does it take?"

"I don't know. I'm not a doctor. The main computer might have relevant files. There's nothing restricted from my clearance level." Hux gestured at the console, though he wasn't sure if the relevant files would be in the standard data banks of a shuttle. Come to think of it, it probably wouldn't be. The sort of emergency medical information they carried would never mention hormonal regulation.

"Wait, the food? Was it in those meal bars?"

Hux laughed a little at that. "Anyone might pilfer a meal bar during travel! No, of course not. The drugs are long-enough acting that troopers can be deployed for short assignments without any attention to it. It's only when assignments are for …" Hux waved his hand vaguely in the air. "I really don't know. Ask me about the hyperdrive engines and I have answers. But not about the internals of a human being." Aside from where he needed to stab one.

"Okay. Okay. Does Finn know this?"

"Stormtroopers aren't allowed to procreate. He knows that. Is he aware that the disinterest in sex he's felt his whole life is medically induced? I have no idea. The method isn't something we advertise."

"Stormtroopers. What about the officers?"

"What about them? It's voluntary, a decision made on an individual level."

"Are you … taking …?"

"No."

Poe nodded slowly. Softer, he asked, "Are you interested? In me?"

"You want an answer." Hux frowned.

"Yeah, I do. If the answer's no, then I'll stop."

"No," Hux said hastily, then realized what he'd said. "No, I mean- No. It's- Yes, I'm … I'm interested." He exhaled tensely. "Fine. There. You have it."

Poe covered his mouth and chuckled. "Okay. Thank you. Now, how do two officers date, if they're interested in one another?"

Hux sighed heavily. "Generally, it involves … I … They … go in one another's quarters a lot." He colored again. "I don't know, Poe. I've never done it. I've never paid much attention to those who did." Listening to Ren and Rey bang about in the rear compartment was the most exposure he'd ever had to the matter outside of routine educational classes.

"What about the people you work with?"

"What about them?"

"Do they date each other?"

"The older ones were already settled. The younger ones generally weren't. A great many people in the First Order are … were … very young." How many of them were still alive? His expression sobered. Mitaka? Keldane? Not Unamo. But that was only a bad dream. Survivor's guilt or some illusion Sidious was whispering into his head. He'd seen her leave the bridge, but there was no way to guarantee she'd even made it off the ship to fall into Sidious' clutches.

"Hey," Poe said, sitting straighter. "Don't drift into that black hole of despair again. I see it on your face. Don't give up." He extended his hand. The pilot and copilot sat just close enough to touch if they both reached out.

Hux sat forward and did. Their fingers touched. He could just hold Poe's fingers between his own fingers and thumb. "I … Earlier, when I refused you … I shouldn't have, but I had to."

"You had to? Why?" Hux just shook his head. He kept fondling Poe's fingers. Poe went on, "I think you'll find the Resistance is more understanding than you think. We've got both Kylo and Finn among us and they're not the only First Order people we've been around. You're all people. We know that."

"Yes, well, I'm concerned about my own people as well. They need an image of strength to follow. Having night terrors and … being consoled … That's not …" He pulled away now.

Poe let his hand drop. "You're doing fine. You're human. And if it comes to it, me, and probably most of the Resistance folks here, will defend you against your own troopers."

Ren at least had saved Hux's life for a reason. Hux didn't think he'd have done that if he were willing to let it be squandered. Not unless Hux became an irritant to him and so far he had not been. Hux said, "Your words are very comforting."