As Clarke exits the room, leaving her mother and Kane to get ready for the ceremony, she's told by the guards that Lexa is waiting for her in the throne room. She smiles at the idea of being in her presence again, but her smile fades away as soon as she remembers Abby's. Don't expect me to be ok with this. It doesn't matter how bad Clarke wants to convince herself that she's not a kid anymore, hence she doesn't need her mother. She's always going to care about Abby's opinion, and she really wishes for her mom to be approving and happy for her right now. But unfortunately, that's not how Abby feels. That's really the thing about her mother: she always says Clarke can talk to her, but she never really listens to, or understands, what her daughter has to say. Oh well, whatever, she might not be able to change her mom, but at least she can tell Lexa it worked...
"Clarke?" Lexa asks from her throne when she sees her entering the room with tear tracks on her cheeks and a blank expression. Clarke seems too busy worrying her mind with whatever it is that's bothering her that she doesn't even notice Lexa's presence. Actually, the Commander is pretty sure Clarke doesn't even realize where she is right now. Not understanding what the hell is going on, Lexa can't help but become worried as she moves to stand from her throne. She walks towards Clarke, who has yet to look at her, and tries again to get the girl's attention.
"Clarke? Clarke, what's wrong?" Only when Lexa places a hand on her shoulder does Clarke finally raise her head to look at Lexa. She's almost surprised to see her standing in front of her, and she darts her eyes around the room as if to figure out where she is.
Clarke's confusion only makes Lexa worry even more. "Clarke, what happened? Did your mother disagree to join the coalition?"
Clarke looks back at Lexa for a moment before closing the distance between them, embracing the other girl tightly in her arms. Lexa is left dumbstruck for a second, still trying to understand what's the meaning of Clarke's strange behavior. But she soon collects herself, returning the hug just as fiercely.
"My mother said yes." Clarke mumbles after a while. "We'll become the 13th clan."
"I knew I was right to have faith in you." Lexa smiles as she leans down to place a soft kiss on Clarke's hair. Her words, though, only manage to bring more tears to Clarke's eyes.
As soon as Lexa feels the wetness on the skin of her neck, her smile falters and worry overcomes her again. She gently leans back so she can look her in the eyes. Clarke feels so vulnerable right now she can't even bring her gaze up to meet Lexa's. Of course, she knows she'd only be finding understanding in those beautiful green eyes, but she still can't get herself to look up at her. Since Clarke doesn't move, Lexa places her hands on both her cheeks, and starts wiping the tears away with her thumbs. Then, very gently, she starts tilting the girl's head up. "Please, tell me what's wrong. Why are you crying?"
Shaking her head and chuckling lightly at the emotional mess that she is, Clarke places a hand on her cheek over Lexa's. "I'm sorry. It's just... It's stupid, really. Don't worry about it." She attempts a smile, but that doesn't seem to be convincing enough for Lexa.
"It's not stupid if it made you cry. You can tell me. You know I won't judge you." She strokes her thumb over Clarke's cheek to reassure her even more.
"That's the thing. You don't ever judge me." Clarke starts saying as she moves away from Lexa's touch. "You've always placed your faith in me, even when we were just two strangers to each other. You've always been reluctant to trust other people, but for some reason, you've always trusted me." Lexa looks at her with a look of confusion, not understanding where this is going. "After killing Finn, I was drowning in my own guilt. But then you came around and told me about Costia. You told me love was weakness, and… I knew you were wrong. I did. But I still believed you hard enough to be able put myself back together." Clarke comes back to stand right in front of Lexa before finishing. "I don't know how you do it. But you always know exactly what to say to make me feel better."
Now Lexa's eyes are watery as well. All she's ever wanted was for Clarke to be okay, and knowing her words helped feel better just makes her the happiest person in the world.
"Your mother's only ever seen the Commander's side of me. Give her time, she'll come round at some point." Lexa looks down and takes Clarke's hand into hers. she remains focused on their joined hands or a moment, then she looks back up at Clarke with determination in her eyes. "I'll make sure she knows I'm more than just the heartless Commander who abandoned you at Mount Weather."
"You're not heartless, Lexa. You're quite possibly the most caring person I've ever met. You care about each every one of your people with all your heart. you care about me. And I know deep down you care about my people too." A warm smile appears on her face as she speaks the next words. "And once again, you knew exactly what was bothering me, and what I needed to hear to feel better. I don't think a heartless person would be able to that." Lexa returns the smile as Clarke cups her cheek and wipes away a tear with her thumb.
They stay like that for a little while, until Clarke decides to close the distance between them, embracing Lexa in a warm hug. Not letting go of the other woman, Clarke whispers softly in her ear. "I think you're my soulmate, Leksa kom Trikru."
"Soulmate?"
"Yeah. It's… like a best friend. But more." Clarke moves out of the embrace so she can face Lexa as she explains. "I mean, you're the one person in the world who knows me better than anyone else. You even make me a better person. Because you inspire me… to be better." Clarke pauses briefly, giving Lexa time for her words to sink in. "I know, you're the one person I will carry with me forever. Cuz… Lexa, you're the only one who knows me, and accepts me, and believes in me, before anyone else does. Or when no one else will." Clarke places her hand back on Lexa's cheeks as she stares straight into her eyes to say the last part. "Ai hod yu in, Leksa kom Trikru. I love you now, and I'll love you forever. Nothing could change that." And with that she leans in and kisses Lexa with all the love she can convey.
They kiss slowly until they need to part for air. Keeping her forehead pressed to Clarke's, Lexa finally finds her voice again to let the woman know how she feels. "I love you too, Klark kom Skaikru."
Not that Clarke needed to hear it anyway. Of course, she knows Lexa feels the same way about her, she'd known that from the moment she told her "Not everyone. Not you.". But still, it's really nice to hear her say the actual words. The grins appearing on both their faces in the moment are so big they could as well light up the whole city in the darkest of nights. Their eyes get watery again as they lean in to kiss on more time. It's just quick a kiss, but it carries nonetheless all the love they feel for each other. Plus, they'll have plenty of time to kiss once the ceremony is over, and the deal with Skaikru is sealed.
Speaking of, Clarke suddenly realizes that she doesn't really know how said ceremony will work. All she knows for sure is that she'll have to bow to the Commander of the 12 clans, but besides that she's clueless. That's why she decides to take advantage of the moment to ask Lexa for more details.
"So about-"
"Maybe we should-"
They start at the same time, blushing and cutting themselves short. They look at each other in silence for a little while, neither wanting to speak first. Finally, Clarke takes the initiative and starts talking again.
"About tonight's ceremony... I... I don't really know what we're supposed to do. To become the 13th clan, I mean." The timid look on Clarke's face makes Lexa smile in amusement. The girl is so adorable. How can she and Wanheda be the same person is beyond her understanding.
"Well... Wanheda is expected to bow to the Commander in display of the fact that your power is now joined with mine. Then, to symbolize our union, the leader of Skaikru needs to be marked with the coalition's emblem."
"And that's going to be either my mom or Kane." Clarke says in a defeated tone. "There's no way they'll never recognize me as their leader…"
"Well, actually… That might be a good thing..." Seeing Clarke's questioning look, Lexa continues to explain. "We need an ambassador from each clan to stay here in Polis. And I was thinking... I thought that maybe you could be the ambassador for Skaikru."
A smirk appears on Clarke's face as she speaks. "Is that your way of asking me to move in with you, Heda?"
"Maybe. I mean… Would you? Stay here in Polis with me?"
"Remember when outside Mount Weather you asked me what I wanted, and I said nothing?" Lexa hums in affirmation and Clarke continues. "You said I should've come with you to the Capital, that Polis would've changed the way I thought about you."
"And you said I already had."
Clarke's gives her a confirming nod. "I might not have been ready to be with you at the time, but of one thing I'm sure. I was already deeply, madly in love with you, Heda." Clarke moves closer to Lexa, and takes hold of her hand. After intertwining their fingers, she goes on talking. "I do know what I want now, Lexa. I want you. It doesn't matter where I live… here or in Arkadia… I just wanna be with you. You are my home."
"Your people might not be very happy with your choice to stay here."
"I don't care. Everything I ever did on the ground has been for my people. I'd like be selfish for once and do something for me. I mean, I love them, but… I'm kind of tired of fighting for their lives as I can barely survive in the meantime. Maybe it's time you and I get to live too. Don't you think we've earned that?"
"Maybe we have." It's barely above a whisper, but Clarke hears it loud and clear. And with that, she moves in to kiss Lexa one more time.
"You sent for me?"
"Yes. Octavia has nothing to fear from me. I do trust you, Clarke."
"I know how hard that is for you."
"You think our ways are harsh, but that's how we survive."
"Maybe life should be about more than just surviving. Don't we deserve better than that?"
"Maybe we do."
Yeah. They definitely do.