ABNEGATION HELLIONS

CHAPTER THREE

Zeke POV

Visiting Day is finally here.

It has been two weeks since I have seen my family. Now, I know that doesn't sound like that long, and I know it's only a small fraction of the time that will pass before I see them again… but it still feels like forever. I have always been especially close with the twins, Uriah and Beatrice. Not nearly as close as they are with each other, of course; their bond is almost freakish, and I'll never admit to anyone how jealous I have been at times. Still, point is, they're not just my siblings, they're my best friends, and I miss them like hell.

I do still have Tobias, my other best friend. I expected initiation to only bring us closer, but I feel like he is still holding back. I guess that's just how Tobias ― or should I say "Four" ― is. He changed his name when we arrived at Dauntless, as did I. Mine changed as soon as I jumped off that building and was pulled out of the net I landed in. (Third jumper right here, pretty good for an Abnegation transfer, am I right? Four was last.) I adapted Tris's nickname for me and now go by Zeke. Four's name was given to him by our instructor, Amar, after our fear landscapes the first day. He set a new record by having only four fears. I had twelve.

"You're comin', right?" I say to Four, elbowing him in the arm. He glares at me.

"I don't know, Zeke," he sighs. "What if my dad is there? I don't want to see him." I don't know why he hates his dad so much; that's something he has never shared with me. And if Four doesn't want to share something, he won't. There is no coaxing it out of him.

"Four," I scold him. "You know Beatrice will be pissed if she doesn't get to see you, and she will shoot the messenger. Which is who, this time? Oh yeah. Me."

He hangs his head. "I do want to see her and Uriah. And your parents, too." He sighs. "We can go look, but if Marcus is there, you'll just have to break it to Beatrice that I can't see her today. She will understand, Zeke."

I narrow my eyes at him. I don't understand their friendship. Okay, I'll admit it ― I am a little jealous. Actually, now that I think about it, I am kind of the odd man out. Never as much as Caleb was, though. We all love him, but he just didn't fit in with the rest of us. He was always much more at home with our Abnegation neighbors, Susan and Robert.

"Fine," I concede.

And, unfortunately, when we reach the Pit, Four almost immediately spots Marcus and shrinks back, away from where he might be seen. "Sorry, Ezekiel," he says, shaking his head. Before I can protest, he has turned and disappeared down a tunnel.

When I reach my family, I hug Mom first, then Dad. I come to Beatrice next and linger. She feels a little more solid than last time I hugged her. Good, she was too skinny. "I'm sorry, Beatrice," I murmur. "As you might have guessed, Four, I mean Tobias, isn't coming because of his dad." When I pull back, although I see understanding in her eyes, just as Four had predicted, I also see tears and something that almost looks like panic. I am about to ask her what is going on when Uriah pulls my attention away.

"Ezekiel, man, I've missed you!" he says, loud and excited. We "man-hug", as others around here have called it. This time I lean in and whisper, "Keep training, and add knives."

Uriah looks a little confused for a split second, then his brain catches up to the quick subject change and he nods.

"I'm afraid we can't stay very long," Mom apologizes. "We must go to Erudite as well, to see Caleb."

I frown but nod. I'll have my little brother and sister back in less than a year. Caleb is isolated from the rest of the family forever.

Marcus approaches a few minutes later, interrupting our precious family time. "Excuse me, Ezekiel, but do you know where I can find Tobias?" he asks. I am no longer used to the constant over-polite demeanor of the Abnegation after a few weeks in Dauntless. I never noticed before how practiced Marcus's demeanor is, like it is a little too perfect.

"I'm sorry, Marcus, but I don't know what Tobias was planning to do today. I'm sorry he hasn't made it here yet." Behind him, up on a path high above the Pit, I see a glimpse of Tobias looking on with a pained expression. He turns and disappears back into the shadows.

"Thank you anyway, Ezekiel," Marcus says with a forced smile. "I'll leave you to your reunion, then. Please tell my son that I was sorry to have missed him."

"I will," I agree.

Beatrice POV

"Where did you even get these?" Uriah asks, examining the knife in amazement.

I giggle. "They were in one of the closets in that back room there." Our training room is what we believe to have been an old police training center from before the war. A lot of equipment, to our surprise, was still here. Most of the closets are more than a little disorganized, so it has been difficult to really take stock of our resources; none of us ever wanted to spend these stolen hours cleaning out old closets rather than honing our skills. I finally resolved to spend a few minutes of each visit picking through the storage spaces, and it paid off the other day when I found a half-dozen throwing knives.

I continue adjusting my stance and aim, getting closer to the center of our makeshift target little by little. I found a book at the school library that had a tutorial on knife throwing, though I had to be pretty sneaky to look for such a thing. The Abnegation do not read for pleasure or study things unnecessary for their volunteer duties and schoolwork. What we are doing ― exercising our own hobbies and interests ― is self-indulgent and decidedly un-Abnegation.

Whatever. Everyone will know very soon how un-Abnegation I am.

"So… what's your plan, Beatrice?" Uriah asks for the millionth time.

"I don't want to discuss it right now," I say… for the millionth time as well… as I let another knife fly.

"Beatrice Grace Prior!" Uriah shouts, making me jump. Uriah never gets harsh like this. I stare at him with wide eyes. "You can't just put this conversation off forever, you know that? Sooner than later, it's going to be obvious to everyone. You don't seriously want to wait for Mom and Dad to figure it out on their own, do you?"

Tears pool in my eyes. "I'm scared, Uriah!" I whimper. "How do I explain this? What the hell am I supposed to tell them? 'Hey Mom and Dad, just a little minor issue I need to mention… You know how you were never going to get to know your grandchildren because we were all transferring? Well, guess what! Now you get to know two of them for a little while before I go! Surprise ― I'm pregnant with twins!' I don't think so, Uri!"

"I don't know what you say, Tris," he sighs. "But I know I will be beside you every step of the way."

I fall into my brother's arms and rest my head against his broad shoulder. Last week, he ditched class with me in order to force me to visit the clinic that is located about ten blocks from the upper levels school we attend. It seems we ended up with the same nurse who helped Tobias when he stopped in, because she made a comment about those condoms being "too little too late" as she looked at me with disdain. If that's how an Erudite responds to teenage pregnancy, what will the Abnegation say?

Anyway. The midwife that eventually came in and did an ultrasound informed me that not only am I, indeed, pregnant… but the ultrasound was showing not one, but two fetuses- twins- and I am now three months along, due five months before my Choosing Day.

"What are you going to do about Tobias?" he asks, still hugging me.

I shrug. "I don't think I have much choice, Uri. We'll just have to show up to Dauntless on Choosing Day with baby twins in tow."

"He's going to be upset that you didn't tell him before he left," Uriah warns.

I tense. I miss Tobias so much. I dream about him, I cry myself to sleep most nights. I don't know how I will make it through this year without him, and Uriah knows that. I don't need a guilt trip. I feel guilty enough already.

"I know that!" I snap, stepping away from him and crossing my arms over my expanding chest defensively. "It was the right thing to do, Uri. He would have stayed. You know I couldn't let him stay. But then Marcus"- I spit his name like an expletive- "had to go and ruin Visiting Day, too."

I sigh, and Uri kisses the top of my head. I take a deep breath as I pull away from him. "Come on," I say, "let's get back to these knives."