A.N.: Thanks to my friend Multilingualism this chapter is now also in much better shape. Thank you for your help!
Chapter 20: Hard decisions
Ever since Mr Weasley's injury Hermione's thoughts started spinning in circles. As Severus had predicted the times were getting more dark and dangerous very quickly and Hermione could almost feel the dark clouds forming over her. And she couldn't help but worry.
How long would it take until it was clear that Lavender was not the Open Link? And what would happen then? Would they ever see her again? And would the hunt for the Open Link begin anew? She didn't know but she expected that this was only a short reprieve for her.
"Come in," Severus' voice invited her in after she found herself disillusioned in front of his office – again. She expected that it wouldn't be long until the man was fed up with her and her insecurities, but at the moment he was the only person she could openly talk to.
Hermione followed Severus hesitantly inside and cancelled the disillusionment as soon as they had reached his private quarters again. For some reason, he didn't stay with her in his office anymore, but Hermione didn't complain, as she liked his private quarters much better.
"How can I help you today, Hermione?" he asked her patiently as soon as they had both sat down. Hermione had chosen the sofa again and today Severus sat down right next to her. Some weeks ago she would have been uncomfortable with it, but now she enjoyed his calming presence.
"I need your advice, Severus," Hermione admitted and looked into his black eyes. "I am worried about my parents. It is only a matter of time until Lavender is found out not to be the Link and I don't know how long I have afterwards until… you know."
Her friend nodded solemnly and she continued: "But it's not only that. You told me that things will get worse and now that Mr. Weasley was attacked, I realized that we don't know how much longer it will be until Muggles and especially the parents of Muggleborns are attacked."
"And you are worried they will come after your parents?" he asked her with an understanding expression on his face.
Hermione nodded. "Yeah. But I don't know what I should do. What can I even do? When I tell my parents how dangerous our world has gotten, they will remove me from school and most likely move to France or something. But if I don't tell them, then it's only a matter of time until they become a target, right?"
Severus sighed. "Most likely, yeah. It's hard to say how much time there is left, but as soon as you are found out, they will be in danger. I am sorry."
She shook her head. "Don't be. It's not your fault." Hermione gently placed her hand over his and smiled. "To be honest, I don't know what I would do without your support and advice. It's the only thing that's keeping me calm and collected right now. Thank you."
He grunted something unintelligible as a response.
"What should I do, Severus? This whole situation is so much out of my depth that I simply don't know."
Her Professor sighed. "That's a difficult question, Hermione and there's no right answer to this. It's a decision you have to make on your own. What do you want to do Hermione? Do you want to tell them the truth? Do you want to leave the country? Or do you want to stay here but know that they are safe?"
Hermione thought long about his question. The thought of leaving her friends alone in this mess felt wrong and made her heart ache. But she also needed to keep her parents safe, because she would never forgive herself if something happened to them. She sighed before she told this to Severus.
He nodded with a serious expression. "And you are sure that they wouldn't leave the country without you? Because that's what they need to do if you want them to be safe."
"No, they wouldn't. They'd either stay or force me to come with them and as I am not of age…"
Severus stroked his chin before he said: "Then you'll need to obliviate them and send them away. It's the only way to get what you want if you're sure you wouldn't be able to convince them without the help of magic. But you need to be aware that they might never forgive you afterwards."
Hermione looked at him with wide eyes. He was right, even though she didn't like the answer he had given her. Modifying her parent's memories? Could she even do that? What if she messed something up? She was only a fifth year, after all. She stared into her lap and folded her hands there. After a while, she started wringing them, but the heaviness she felt on her heart was only increasing. "I'm not sure if I can do that, Severus. It's not only that I would have to delete something from their mind, but I'd also need to modify their memory. This is really advanced magic."
He nodded. "Indeed."
Hermione looked at her hands with a small sigh. "I know this is probably too much to ask of you but… could you do it? Please?"
Severus' expression morphed to one of disbelief. "You want me to modify your parent's memories?"
She nodded and involuntarily her lip was back between her teeth. "I know you are not a professional Obliviator, but you do know a lot about the human mind. And you know my parents like no other magical person." Hermione looked at him with her eyes full of desperation. "Please, Severus."
He looked at her for a long while and seemed to study her with his eyes. But finally, he sighed and said: "I'll do it. But only if you're sure that's what you want. Asking somebody to do something like that requires a lot of trust."
"I trust you, Severus, absolutely," she assured him and took his hands once more.
"Very well. Then I'll visit your parent's house two days after Christmas. You'll need a place where you can stay afterwards though, not only for now. But what will you do during the summer holidays?"
She sighed. "There's always the Burrow. I guess the Weasleys would take me in if I'd ask them. But they might ask questions and I'm not sure how to answer them."
"There's enough time for you to think of something, but you'll have to let them know soon, or otherwise it will look too suspicious."
"I guess you're right. But I'll come up with something," she said and smiled shyly.
He snorted. "I'm sure you will. Just take it as a chance to practise your lying skills, because you'll be forced to use them quite a lot if we're really doing this."
"I know," Hermione admitted with a solemn expression. "But it's worth it and I'd do so much more to keep the ones I love safe."
Severus nodded with a grim expression. "Good, because you'll probably have to before this war is over."
ssssssss
The Burrow felt empty without their dad, so Fred and George didn't mind too much when their mum told them that they would move to Grimmauld Place over the holidays. Yes, Fred and George didn't like the dark and gloomy place, but almost losing one's father put some things back into perspective, even for them. Because when there was something both of them loved, it was their family.
But to their surprise, Grimmauld Place wasn't that dark and gloomy at all. Their mum must have used her free time to clean out some more of the rooms and even though that house-elf was still a grumpy bastard, his owner wasn't much like the person Fred and George had met during their summer holidays. Sirius Black didn't only look worlds better than the thin, exhausted man he had been a few months ago, he also had rediscovered a part of his once cheerful personality. He happily whistled his way through the house and had cheerfully started to put up Christmas decorations everywhere and for some reason, this almost cheered them up as much as the news that their dad would indeed recover because that was the greatest news of all. Their father had survived an attack that was meant to kill him and even though he still looked weak, the smile was already back on his face, when they visited him in his little room at St Mungos. And when he told them that he'd most likely be home for Christmas, it was the best Christmas present he could have given them.
" 'm glad he's okay," George mumbled when the two of them had crawled into their beds in the evening.
"Me too, Georgie," Fred agreed with a sigh. "But he might not be the next time, you know? If this whole thing has taught me something then it's, that this war is getting fucking dangerous - even more now that the Open Link disappeared on us."
"I know, Fred. How much longer will it be until the next person dies or disappears? How many of our family will be left next year for Christmas?"
"Let's not think about it now, Georgie," Fred said and a moment later he climbed out of his bed and joined George in his. They used to climb into each other's beds a lot in the past, but as they grew older those occasions became rarer and rarer. Nowadays they only did it, when one of them needed comfort and at the moment they both did. "No matter what happens, it will always be you and me," Fred said and pulled his brother into a hug.
George nodded against his shoulder. "Yeah, no matter how dark the times will get, I'll be at your side. And together we'll pull through, Okay?"
"Absolutely. You and me, Georgie. Voldisnort doesn't stand a chance."
sssssssss
Lying to her parents was the hardest, Hermione found, not only because she loved them and it hurt her to do it, but also they knew her since her childhood and so it was easy for them to spot a lie. But Hermione meant what she told Severus. She was prepared to do so much more to keep them safe and so she put on a happy face when she met them at King's Cross and started chatting happily about her school year. Her parents listened to her happy ramblings all the way home and Hermione entertained them with every happy story she remembered from her time at school. But with every laugh or chuckle from her parents, her heart broke a bit more for them. When she was finally able to close the door to her room in the evening of her first day at home, she buried her face in her pillow and shed bitter tears for the time she would probably never have with her parents and for their trust, that she'd probably lose forever. She wasn't sure how she should survive the days until Severus was finally here and would take them from her, probably for forever. Even though Hermione was at home, she felt as lonely as she did never before in her life and she desperately wished that there was someone, who would hold her and help her through these desperate times. And in a hidden corner of her heart, she realized that it was not one but in fact two boys she was wishing for, even though she knew she could never have them. But just tonight, she allowed herself to dream about them, how it would feel to lie in their arms and be kissed by them. And somehow that made her feel a little bit better.
"Well, honey," her mum said the next morning after breakfast. "You've been suspiciously silent about your love-life ever since you were back to Hogwarts. Wasn't there this nice red-headed boy? What was his name again?"
Hermione groaned inwardly. She should have known that her mum would pick the first moment with her dad out of the house to interrogate her daughter. Hermione's mum knew very well what George's name was but this was her not-so-subtle way to pick her daughter's brain. Hermione smiled. "You mean Ron?"
Emma Granger rolled her eyes. "No, not Ron, sweetheart. There was this very handsome brother of his, George, wasn't it?"
Hermione snorted. "Yeah, there are George and Fred for that matter." She looked at her mum with pink cheeks. Usually, she would have been shy to talk to her about those kinds of feelings, but this was probably the last chance for her to get some motherly advice. And so she said: "They invited me on a date to Hogsmeade, mum."
"What, both of them?" the woman across from her said and looked at her with a stunned expression.
Hermione pressed her lips together and nodded. "Yeah. They said they wanted me to get to know them better… to be able to decide if I'd want to date one of them properly someday. But the thing is mum…" She swallowed heavily. "I never could…"
"You like them both, don't you?" Emma Granger said with an understanding smile on her face and Hermione nodded sadly.
"I do. I know I shouldn't because obviously, I can't have them both. But god, I wish I could."
Suddenly her mum was right next to her and pulled her to her feet and into a hug. "That's what you told them, didn't you?" she asked and stroked her daughter's curls. Hermione nodded mutely against her shoulder.
"I had to. I couldn't string them along and give them hope for a decision I would never be able to make. It wouldn't have been fair to any of them."
"No, it wouldn't. But the heart wants, what the heart wants, doesn't it?" her mum asked.
"Yeah," Hermione admitted sadly. "This was weeks ago but somehow I still want them. How long does it take, until these feelings go away, mum?"
"Sometimes it takes weeks, sometimes months. And sometimes not even years are enough to forget a person. Let's hope it's not the latter in your case," the woman said and smiled. "Because growing into an adult is hard enough as it is without having the heartbreak on top of it."
Hermione snorted. "You don't say. Believe me, sometimes I feel like everybody around me has started going crazy. Everyone is suddenly so emotional and there's so much drama around… It's like being on a rollercoaster of feelings."
Her mum patted her back lovingly. "It is. But that's puberty. You'll pull through one day, don't worry. And until then you better find yourself a nice guy for a snog or two."
Hermione giggled. "I bet you're telling me the total opposite from what those pure-blooded witches get to hear from their parents. For them it's all about being proper and upholding the name of their family."
Emma Granger snorted. "That sounds like they're still stuck somewhere in the middle ages."
"Yeah," Hermione replied with a little smile, as she imagined Malfoy's reaction to her mum's words. She was sure he wouldn't like to be called stuck in the middle-ages. But the guy probably didn't even have an idea of how a modern family looked like. "I'm happy I've got two open-minded parents like you." Hermione's heart broke at her words because she knew very well that it wouldn't be long until her parents wouldn't even remember they had a daughter at all. She could only beg that all of them would survive the war and that they would forgive her one day. Not that Hermione had much of a choice in that matter if she wanted to keep them safe.