Disclaimer: I do not own any of OreImo's features such as the characters, stories, rights, etc. as they are the property of their respective owners.
Serene Days | Chapter 3: Is This Love?
Kyousuke:
As I lazily opened my eyes following the slap, I was greeted to the sight of Kirino looking down at me. Her marine eyes sparkled with some sort of fluttering determination, something I've only seen glimpses of when I used to go watch her track meets.
I felt the sides of her legs squeezing against my body while the weight of her body was constantly pressing against my stomach. Despite this being a frequent occurrence before each life counseling session, it was still quite awkward and uncomfortable. It's not like I was being constricted by a snake or anything but… she's still kinda heavy.
"Uh… Kirino? Do you think you can get off me now?". I shot her a quizzical look before she suddenly realized what I said. She quickly broke her focused gaze on me by looking the other way. She softly got off me and leaned on the wall next to my door.
"You don't have to go that far… you can just sit on my chair." I watched as she meekly nodded in response and walked across my room to sit in my chair in silence, still avoiding eye-contact. What the hell happened to the determination? She's gone full Naoki now…
"Say…you're the one that wanted life counseling, so what point is there if we're just going to sit here in my room and say nothing?" I directed my gaze at Kirino, making my intentions clear that I wanted her to talk. Instead of looking back at me though, she changed her gaze to my desk as a result of my focused stare.
My desk had nothing much on it. Just books, papers, utilities, and the computer I borrowed from her. Why is she looking at it so intensively? Before I could ask her, she placed her elbow on the table and rested her head on the hand of the same arm. She then turned to look intensively at me with a side glare, showing her blush. Despite the embarrassment she seemed to be feeling though, it looks like avoiding eye-contact with me allowed her to regain her determination.
"Back when you were living at that flat for your studies… did Ayase say anything weird to you?". Kirino's gaze remained fixed at me as she asked her question. It was concentrated to the point that it felt like a dart flew past my head when she asked, almost grazing me. Ayase huh? What about Ayase has her this deter… wait a second.
As I tried to brainstorm reasons why she'd be concerned about what Ayase talked to me about, I suddenly remembered the ordeal that occurred right as I was about to leave my flat for good. Of course… the confession, but how did she know it happened?
I didn't answer instantly as I tried on my best, wholehearted thinking impression while looking down so that Kirino didn't suspect I knew something concrete. My facade didn't seem to work though because as soon as I looked up she was pouting with her arms crossed.
"You… you do know you're the worst at deceiving people right?". I'm shocked. I know I'm not the best actor but I seriously thought I could delay the situation for longer than mere seconds. Defeated, I scratched the back of my head and sighed as I fixed my gaze to the floor again. Now it was my turn to avoid eye-contact.
"What did she tell you? Answer me!". Kirino suddenly moved closer and leaned her face near mine. Her eyes now reflected a little annoyance as a result of me trying to delay my answer by looking elsewhere. After directing my gaze to random areas in my room, I tried to leer right back at her in hopes of getting her embarrassed again, but instead, I was met with a stare burning right into my soul.
"Stop that". I grabbed her shoulders and pushed her away from me gently. She was a bit surprised by the sudden contact, but her frown and stare remained intact, still signaling that she needed an answer from me immediately. "Fine, fine… I'll talk".
After scrubbing my eyes with my forearm, I began to tell her about how Ayase confessed her romantic feelings to me and that I turned her down. I did leave out some crucial details though. If she found out I got kissed on the cheek I might not leave my room alive.
As I finished my paraphrased story, Kirino leaned back on my chair, playing around with its mobility as she moved and rotated it across my floor. After playing with my chair for half a minute she turned back to me, still blushing. Why is she embarrassed? It should be me. I'm the one talking about getting confessed to here…
"Why did you turn her down?". It was a very quiet question posed by my little sister, who still displayed traces of frowning and annoyance. The question was a hard one to answer, not that I didn't know the answer, but that saying it would be difficult and have major consequences.
I wonder how she'd react if out of the blue I answer saying 'because I like you'. How would she react? Her blood-related brother, turning down her best friend, a beautiful model, for his own little sister? I shook my head of these thoughts, they were only weighing down on my decision making.
"It's not like I didn't see her in that way… it's just that, I like someone else." I answered her question honestly. It wasn't the full story but it was the truth. I continued to look down at my feet, not daring to look back up due to my embarrassment. Boy, I must be blushing as much as she is aren't I?
After starting at the floor in silence for a few minutes, I grew a bit impatient to see what Kirino was doing instead of replying to my answer. I looked up to see Kirino crouched up like a ball in my seat. Her knees were pressed tightly to her chest as he rested her head on her kneecaps. She was surprised by my sudden eye-contact and as a result, she rotated the chair in the opposite direction.
"Who?". Like her previous question, this query was barely audible as well. This one though, I couldn't make out. Intrigued by her returning meekness I stood up and put my hand on the top of the chair, my fingers stretching out to touch her shoulders.
"What did you ask?". I put my other hand on her shoulders as well, trying to prompt the question out of my sister. She wasn't budging though, so I moved my hands off her shoulders and readjusted them into a prime poking position near her lower sides.
I swung my hands closer and poked her with both index fingers simultaneously, prompting Kirino to jolt up in surprise and let out a small cry. I quickly surveyed the area near my door out of instinct to check if anyone had heard that. Thankfully, I didn't hear or see anything at all from that direction so I turned my head down to look at Kirino frowning back at me.
"What was that for baka?". She lifted her head up for a headbutt attempt but I evaded and grabbed the sides of her head. Using my four fingers to hold her head in place, I used my free thumbs to press against the side of her head in a circular motion, akin to the head messages you'd get at salons except I did mine a bit harder.
"Are you going to tell me now? What did you ask Kirino?". I playfully continued to mess around with her head while smiling wickedly as she softly scrambled around in my seat, trying to break the massage. After having enough, Kirino stopped squirming and dug her nails into my hands. "I said who? Who is it that you like? Baka!"
I let her go after hearing her question loud and clear. Oh dear, the one question I didn't want to answer. She rotated my chair to face me again, still blushing and pouting from the previous tickling. Despite mellowing her down a bit, she still seemed as steadfast as ever, intent on receiving an answer from me.
"Why do you want to know though?". I adjusted the neck of my shirt as an accompanying act to my question. That was the one thing that I did not want to answer just yet. I'm fully aware of my feelings for Kirino, as meddled and risky as they may be.
Over the period we reconciled, I found myself more and more involved in her life. Of course, there was the time I spent as Kuroneko's boyfriend but, after practically being with her so much more frequently afterward, I started to notice the way I looked at her, the way I thought about her, the way I spoke to her, they were all changing.
At first, I was confused and conflicted, denying these thoughts in my head, refusing to accept what they really were, but staying apart from her for around a month made me realize how much I missed her presence despite Ayase's visits. How much she meant to me could no longer be suppressed. I wanted to secure the most ideal scenario where I would eventually reveal these changing feelings… but now isn't that time.
"Don't answer my question with a question! Just tell me! Why did you turn Ayase down?". Kirino raised her voice to show her displeasure in my reluctance to give a satisfactory answer. I was a bit surprised as well by her growing annoyance.
Fearing that her voice may be too loud, I whispered to tell her to calm down so that our parents don't wake up and suspect anything, but she was too intent on finding out my answer. "I don't care! Just tell me!"
Kirino tried to grab the neckline of my shirt to intimidate me into answering but I grabbed her arms by the wrist. "Kirino! Calm down!". I tried to wrestle her arms off me but she didn't back down, fully intent on squeezing the truth out of me, literally. After a bit of wrestling, we instantly stopped our bickering due to a large crash downstairs.
"Kirino, be quiet and stay here, I'll go check it out, as I go downstairs go back to your room quickly! We can chat this out later." I attempted to sound strict in my whisper so that Kirino would obey, and she did as she tried to calm down her frustration.
I slowly opened my door to prevent the creak, after I exited, I left it open for Kirino. I surveyed the area before going to walk downstairs, as I did, I saw Kirino exit my room and go back into hers accordingly. Good, she still has the presence of mind to follow my instructions.
I crept down the hallway and saw through the door that someone had turned on the lights in the living room. A burglar? Nah, it's probably just one of my parents. I slowly opened the door to find my dad picking up shards of glass and pressing tissue against the wet floor.
"Dad, what happened here?" My dad turned around quickly, probably as a result of not knowing I opened the living room door. "Oh son, you're still awake? I was just going for a late-nigh bottle of beer until I dropped it." Beer at 1 am? What the hell?
"I couldn't really sleep so I happened to hear you drop the glass bottle, that's why I came to check what happened. Also, why are you drinking this late?" Continuing to clean up whilst listening to my question, he replied firmly. "Your mother doesn't want me to drink much in front of you all. I don't usually drink that much in the first place, it's just that I was gifted this beer by a German colleague so it'd be rude of me not to drink it."
That was just like my dad, always heeding the proper customs and rules. It was a respectful practice. but sometimes I think that it's just either plain old-fashioned or submissive. Either way, my dad has followed these sorts of rules forever so I don't expect him to change any time soon.
"Alright then, I'll leave you to your late-night drinking then, I'll go back to sleep". I closed the living room door and returned to my bed promptly. I was exhausted. Good thing dad distracted us, I'm pretty sure Kirino was hellbent on squeezing the truth out of me, but why was she so desperate?
As I tried to think of reasons why Kirino would want to know who I liked so desperately, an impossible answer popped into my head. I quickly shooed the unlikely reason away from my circle of thoughts.
That'd be ideal, but sadly, life isn't so considerate.
Kirino:
The events that happened in my brother's room appeared vividly in my dreams. The night where I was fascinated by his torso, and today when he was playing around with me. Why is he the only thing showing up in my thoughts? And what the hell is that damn noise!?
I woke up to the loud ringing of my alarm. It was already a bad start to the day as my dreams about my idiot brother were frustrating enough, but this damn alarm clock is making my mood even worse! I scuffled out of my bed to slam my fist on the top button, shutting it up instantly.
"Good morning" I announced as I entered the living room and walked towards the dining table. My mother replied with a hearty 'good morning' while my dad acknowledged my greeting by looking up at me, drinking coffee as usual. I scanned the room to see that my brother hasn't come down yet. This is common though, I'm usually the first sibling to begin eating breakfast first.
After I finished eating, I said goodbye to my parents as I prepared to leave for school. Whilst putting on my shoes, I heard someone walk down the stairs behind me. Turning around to see who it was, I see my brother looking back at me with a creepy smile. "Morning Kirino"
I refused to answer him. I'm still somewhat annoyed by my stupid dreams and his refusal to answer my all-important question last night, therefore I decided to not acknowledge his greeting. I opened the door and shut it behind me, leaving my brother waiting for a reply.
Sometimes I think about my so-called 'tsundere' attitude as Kuroneko describes it. I hate it when people call me a tsundere because the ones I read about in my manga or encounter in eroge are so damn unreasonable. They get angry because of nothing and it irritates the hell out of me. I'm certain I don't get moody that quickly for stupid reasons so I blatantly disagree with anyone calling me that, especially when implying I act that way when I lash out at my brother because he really is an idiot sometimes.
I enter my classroom and sit down in my desk still thinking about why tsunderes annoy the crap out of me but also why I'm such a sucker for the 'dere' part. My thoughts are shattered though by the sensation of my chest being groped from behind. I turn around to see Kanako gleefully smiling whilst fondling my breasts.
"Kanako! Stop that!" I quickly grab her hands and detach them from my body. She moved from behind me to in front of me whilst giggling. "That's what you get for daydreaming and ignoring me, a wholehearted fondle!". I sighed, that was such a Kanako thing to do.
After scolding Kanako about what would happen if she did that again, I saw Ayase walk into the classroom, her long, black hair fluttering as her evident beauty radiated across the classroom. She turned to look at us and smiled. "Why are you fighting?"
As Kanako filled her on what happened, I observed her as she talked. Nothing seems different about her, it's like nothing happened. I'd imagine she'd act a bit differently after turning down my brother and me abruptly hanging up on her, but she seems fine.
"Hey, Ayase, can we talk... after class ends?". Ayase and Kanako turned around after hearing my question. The latter was confused as to why I asked for a sudden talk without her, but Ayase smiled and accepted.
After class ended, Ayase and I walked outside towards the bench and water fountain, away from the masses of people at the sporting areas. "Sorry for instantly hanging up, by the way, I don't know what came over me." I looked apologetically at her to show my regret. In truth, I really did not know what was ailing me that day, and why I continue to feel so strongly about the situation.
"It's ok Kirino, don't be sorry, I mean… I'm sure anyone would be shocked if they were suddenly called and knowing that their sibling was confessed to out of the blue". Ayase offered her hand to me and she smiled endearingly. "Lets put this behind us, it's not a big deal anyway".
I smiled back at shook her hand firmly before we both laughed. We had unintentionally acted like businessmen over such a girly problem. Despite making up over our short issue, I suddenly remembered to ask her something, something crucial that my brother refused to tell me.
"Say Ayase, did my brother tell you who exactly he liked?". I looked on as Ayase looked down at the ground upon hearing my question. Her shoes were scrunching up the leaves below her, a symbol that she was thinking hard about my question.
"No, he didn't tell me, but I do have a good idea of who it could be". What? A good idea? That's the best answer I'll probably get!
"Then can you tel-"
Before I could finish my sentence, Ayase cut me off. "No. This is something you have to figure out by yourself… dummy". She stuck her tongue out at me playfully before starting to walk back to the school building entrance, her hands were tightly intertwined as she walked in front of me.
Great. No one is going to tell me who he likes? Ahh, I want to know! I'm not gonna waste my time stalking him but the suspense is killing me! Is it still Kuroneko? Is it that plain glasses girl? Or is it… As the third thought of my brother's potential target entered my mind, I quickly shook it off.
No way, that's impossible. Besides… why did I feel happy when I considered that option? I don't like him, do I? Is that what this feeling is? The feeling that frustrates me so much? The feeling that never leaves my heart, is that what it is? Love? Have I been falling in love with my brother this whole time? Is that why I got so happy? Happy that the one he likes… is me?
I quickly jumped forward and stomped on some leaves, creating soft, crackling noises upon my landing. There's no way I'm in love with that idiot, and there's no way he's love with me… right? I squeezed my head a bit to punish my brain for making me think of these frustrating thoughts. Ayase turned around and to her amusement, witnessed my stupidity.
"Kirino, um… are you ok?". Embarrassed that I was acting like a kid, I tapped my cheeks with my hands and gave Ayase a convincing thumbs up and smile. After we both laughed my antics off, we made our way down the school hallway. As I stared out the hall's windows while walking back to class, I pondered about the previous conclusion of my feelings.
Is that it? Do I really like my brother? Is that why I got mad when Ayase confessed to him? Is that why I touched his body that night? I can't believe it… that idiot. Out of all the people in the world...I'm in love with that idiot.
AN: The coronavirus and the delays it brings really sucks doesn't it? The whole staying at home part does have some positives though, and that is precisely why I have extra time to write up this chapter for Serene Days! I hope you all stay safe, healthy, and tuned in to the following chapters of this fanfic!