"Dear Art,

I hope this letter finds you well. I would, if I may, like to ask you to read this where you are comfortable. It's regarding Heracles."

Arthur shifted uncomfortably in his sofa. The Drawing Room was relatively empty today seeing that Alfonso was out on a double date with Alfred and another member of the Chosen, and the Chosen girls had organised a movie night. That left Leon, who was napping in the seat facing him, and Thomas who was reading quietly by the window, who noticed him staring still at the letter.

"Arthur, you okay?" His dark skin caught the light of the melting sunset as he put a quick bookmark between the page. "I hope the letter isn't serious."

He wasn't sure how to deflect his fellow Chosen's clearly kind remarks, so he settled for a not so refined response. "I apologise, my maid usually waits until the night to deliver letters."

"No need to be so serious, man. Don't mind me, and Leon…" he looked over at Leon's lolling head, hair still managing to look photoshoot worthy even when he was half snoring. "Well, that guy's asleep, that's for sure."

The two of them shared a laugh before they returned to their respective tasks. Since the field had been narrowed to twelve, not to mention Thomas's friendship with Alfonso, Arthur felt that it was fine for him to remain in the Drawing Room instead of going away to read it. That, and he was allergic to exercise if it wasn't in the gardens.

"I received a letter from him yesterday. It was originally sent to our holding facility - I couldn't get anything from him in terms of contact information before he left for training, but if anything alerts the Primary Suits to our relationship, it would be this. I know that it is technically not treason, nor against the rules of the competition, yet it has me worried. I remember you said that the advisorship in Spades handled deployments, so I decided not to ask King Ludwig about it. Nevertheless, it's a relief to see him still doing well. Though the letter is dated a week ago, he wrote that he was still going through the outer ring of Clubs ports, so he's not in the Easterns, or combat. Yet.

I won't bore you with any more of the news, but I just thought you might want to know. Other than that, we were watching the news, and apparently lessons are to start for you soon? Congratulations, I know how excited you are for them. At least here in Hearts, they were quite similar to the ones in the holding facilities; I'm sure you'll pick up as much as you did back at Hearts.

Though I have made friends here, the loss of our constant friendship is something that is difficult to fill. I am sorry. Please, write back soon, and let me know how you are doing. I'd love to hear more about the rose gardens you were speaking about last week.

Best regards,

Kiku."

He's trying to take my mind off things, was the first thing that came to Arthur's mind. Even if he'd never asked much about Heracles and Kiku's relationship out of respect for their privacy, just judging by the content - or lack thereof - said more than Kiku needed to tell him. At the same time, though, he didn't blame his friend – there were so many troubles this week that he hadn't spoken to him about. The letter had been sent the night before the Broadcast, meaning that he'd missed the entire mess with Alfred, but perhaps that was a good thing. It would have been a valuable opportunity to speak to one of the people he trusted the most about it, but now knowing about his troubles, he should deal with it on his own.

There was a reason why many feared being deployed to the Easterns, a wasteland at best and certain death at worst. Flush with natural resources, it had only been a matter of time before people would be fighting to snatch up what they could. Being so decimated after the pandemic, it wasn't surprising that Cards wanted to seek some of it for themselves.

With King Ivan's uncle sending him away, almost certainly to try to eliminate the strongest challenger to his throne, the history books had written about someone who had returned, never to be the same again. Perhaps conflict still could be avoided. With Cards being inclined towards peace, perhaps they didn't have to deploy people to the Easterns. Perhaps staying within the continent would save them money and time and lives. Perhaps, as Kiku had written, the King of Clubs would see that they were going where he had went five years ago, meaning that he'd be inclined to free more people from revisiting his own hell. If even the young king had deteriorated so sharply after being deployed there, Fates knows what it would do to Heracles, let alone the other soldiers.

Chancing a quick glance at the two other people in the room, he was relieved to see that both of them were engrossed in sleeping and reading the paper, meaning they didn't see how tense his shoulders had been, or his general unhappiness in that moment. Keeping Kiku's secrets was something that he had been doing for years, and as life changing as the Deciding had been, he didn't want that part to change.

He'd have to write a reply tonight. Despite their formal studies starting in a few days, the outings, the Broadcast segments, and trying to stop his mind from wandering to the way Alfred had looked at him that night, Kiku still was as important as he had been before he had entered the Spades palace. From his prior studies, now the pool had been thinned, the number of engagements would only increase. At least he had managed to finish the note to Alfred that morning right after breakfast, or he'd have more things to do on his hands. The clock in the Drawing Room chimed, reminding Arthur that he'd promised Leon he'd wake him at four.

There was the small matter of giving it to him…after the outing three days ago, he had gone on another one with Alfonso and another Chosen candidate that Arthur was unfamiliar with. They were due to arrive back at the palace around forty minutes ago, but the whole place had been quiet save for the sound of a few droplets of rain. Putting down the letter momentarily, he craned his neck, eyebrows furrowing as he realised the droplets had turned into a downpour.. Perhaps their prolonged absence made sense.

Stretching out his cramped legs, Arthur crossed the room to gently shake his friend awake.

"…hello?" Even if he sounded groggy and had sleep dust all over the corner of his eyelids, it was annoying how exquisite Leon looked. Some people had the luck to not deal with constant bed hair. "Oh, Arthur, it's you. Thanks, for like, waking me up and stuff."

About to say something, Arthur only got as far as opening his mouth before the two grandiose doors to the Drawing Room creaked open revealing…Alfonso, looking troubled. Where was the other person he'd been with? Where was Alfred, for that matter?

"Alfonso, you okay?" Thomas quickly got to his feet, concern in every moment as he ran to his friend. "Where's His Highness? Where's-"

"It's okay, we got back fine, it's just that…" he trailed off, taking in the room in front of him. Seeing that it was probably fine to proceed, he continued. "He's been eliminated. The other guy, I mean. Just now."

No one would stop talking about it over dinner. Who could blame them? During an outdoors date, which should have only strengthened a relationship, someone was sent home.

Even Arthur couldn't keep his mind fixated on his meal, which was as fanciful as ever, pheasants and dried fruit and all. Now the meaning of the outdoors date had changed from something a hundred percent positive to something that might put their existence in the Deciding at risk, the dynamic in the room had shifted. Those who had already gotten a date outside were visibly less stressed, but everyone else was feeling as listless as he was.

Thankfully, the courses seemed to whizz past, and it wasn't long before they were preparing to eat dessert. Though it was delectable chocolate mousse, it didn't feel that heavy compared to the small note Arthur had written to give to Alfred later that evening. He didn't want to disturb him, but from how the prince wasn't walking around like he used to, it might not have been a good time.

Arthur was about to give up, barely paying attention when Matthew ended the meal with dismissing everyone, gaze lingering on how Alfred stopped to talk with his brother. Perhaps he would ask a maid, however there was always the concern of them opening it and reading the contents that were meant to be for his eyes only, and Anna was busy preparing things for him now there were all the new events he had to attend as a member of the Chosen. The only thing he could do was linger in the dining hall whilst the servants were putting back the chairs to see if the prince had a thought left for him.

Stuffing his hand in his pocket to make sure the piece of paper was still folded neatly; he was about to turn away to speak to Emma when Matthew looked over his brother's shoulder at his direction. An unspoken question flickered between them, and then he paused his conversation with Alfred to nudge his chin forward at Arthur's direction.

Abruptly, Arthur had no idea how to react. Should he stand his ground? Blend in with the others, who were going to the Drawing Room for the rest of the night, no doubt to talk about the elimination? Or fight for his attention? He'd never been good at doing that, but then again he'd never had to.

"Al, I think someone wants your attention," he heard the Ace say softly, causing him to turn around to Arthur's direction. In that moment, he had no idea what his expression would be – would it be one filled with hatred, or dismissal? It could be something that he wasn't sure how to confront, causing him to run away, or to avoid him for even longer. Arthur had already started to put pressure on his left foot to turn away.

"Oh. Uh, thanks, Matt," Alfred said, his face in full view of the lights. Almost like clockwork, their eyes connected across the room. The blue of Alfred's eyes mirrored the colour of the banners displayed all over the hall, catching the light from the frame of his glasses. Time could have frozen in that moment and Arthur would have been content to look at him all the same.

Had he been prepared to just throw all of that away? There was no way they'd be able to progress past anything if he didn't start to make some effort on his part. Everyone – well, almost everyone – else had used their precious time together to increase their bond, yet Arthur had done nothing this week.

"…Al. You don't have to stand there, you can go talk to him, you know." Matthew sounded annoyed even from a distance, clearly trying to get Alfred to pay attention. "I'll see you tonight."

He gave him a small wave then jogged over to Arthur, standing just a little too close when he came to a stop, backing up instantaneously. "Whoops, sorry about that, heh. You, uh…you wanted to chat?"

Alfred's voice wavered slightly, and by the way he'd stuffed his hands in his pockets he was feeling as self conscious as Arthur was. They hadn't spoken in so many days past formalities, but the invisible pull was still there, as strong as ever, and as hard to resist.

"If you don't mind, I'd…appreciate it," he said, clearing his throat to push away the lump that had suddenly manifested in Alfred's presence. Practically everyone else had filed out of the dining hall by now, leaving the two of them alone. "Is it all right if we relocate, however?"

"Yeah, that's fine with me. I don't wanna disturb the staff. Our usual haunt, then?" At Arthur's confused blink, he let out an awkward chuckle. "Y'know. The gardens and stuff?"

"Oh, yes, that…that sounds all right with me." The words felt foreign as he said them, unused to the formality that had slowly been shed between them. "Lead the way."

"Arthur's not here."

"Leon, you could look more worried when you're saying something like that…"

"He's right though," Emma protested, turning the corner into the Drawing Room, where like every other day, there were plenty of discussion to be had. "That's weird though. He was here on and off this week. I can't help but be worried, just a bit."

Sakura nodded. "And…I believe we have stopped talking about the kiss thing, so it should make the room less awkward for everyone, I think."

A few people besides Emma and Leon shot her looks, but from where Sakura was walking she couldn't see what their exact expressions were. With the popularity poll putting her at the top…and with her getting another date yesterday, she'd been feeling the stares more and more. If she had been alone in the palace, she might not have necessarily left, but the pressure was getting to her.

"Sakura?" Natalya was waiting for her at the door – yet her stare wasn't cold or probing, rather expectant. If nothing, the other girl's unusual friendliness was something she'd grown to appreciate. "It's just you now, come in."

"He, like, probably went to bed early. It's been a long day today, with the lessons and stuff."

"Wasn't he exempt? You know, from being a holding facility member and everything."

"Yeah, but they were tiring, so maybe just thinking about having to attend them tired him out!"

"Nah," Alfonso said with a grin, settling next to Thomas, "He's been too excited about them. Have you seen how he lights up when the Jack talks about them?"

"Huh, fair enough. Anyway, it's probably a case of that guy not wanting to socialise, which is-"

"Fair enough," Emma cut in sharply. There was a break in the conversation before she perked up again. "Socialising's hard work! Anyway, to change the subject, do you think the prince'll visit tonight?"

Laughter and lively conversation echoed around the Drawing Room as everyone took their usual places.

Alfred wasn't quite sure what to feel when Arthur had uncharacteristically approached him for a conversation. Obviously, this led him to jump to all sorts of nasty conclusions. Was he upset? They hadn't talked in almost a week, it was hard to tell. Was he…was he going to ask to leave?

As they walked amongst the pillars once again, the only thing keeping him from blurting out was the memory of hearing Miss Anna speak about how Arthur slept with the present he'd given him. He couldn't help but wonder if it was a mismatch of social norms – did he know how intimate an action like that was? Sure, he was a prince and anything, but that sort of obligation didn't mean that he had to put it on his bed, let alone sleep with it.

Pulling himself out of his thoughts, he looked to where Arthur was quietly walking next to him. He knew that he was always reserved and the face of restraint even on group dates and Broadcasts, but this silence when they were together was unusual. The two of them walked forward together, Alfred expecting a new jab or taunt with every uneven footstep, but as the pillars flew by and their distance increased, he found himself wanting anything.

It did come, when they were at the end of the row of pillars. Usually, they'd step out between the pillars to access the gardens, but the pillars ended at the base of the astronomy tower, one of Alfred's favourite places in the palace. Did Arthur know that from his studies?

"I haven't been here, actually," Arthur said, answering his silent question. "I was too absorbed in-" he trailed off, looking away. "Well. I should really be exploring the palace a little more."

"Maybe." Alfred daren't look at his face; a sudden self consciousness had sprung from hearing Arthur speak after so long. "Do you wanna stay here, then?"

Arthur's head dithered, and he shook it so quietly that he could barely catch it in the darkness. "The acoustics might be odd for the conversation…perhaps we should go back."

With that, the two of them proceeded back inbetween the pillars to the familiar greenery, yet nothing else about the situation could have been more unfamiliar. He didn't know how to respond heroically, or what to do other than to follow Arthur to a more secluded spot. It was a distance away from the hedge maze they'd been in just a few weeks prior, and Alfred couldn't help but let his eyes linger on it, replaying the moments of happiness they'd shared, so much that he didn't notice Arthur looking at him at all as they walked past.

"Perhaps we could sit down here?" The lights of the palace were filtering down onto the area, leaving it a lot less secretive than the hedge maze. "I won't occupy too much of your important time, if that's what you're worried about."

Alfred gave him a smile, though it was a little forced. "Nah, not at all. I've been given a break tonight, so let's chat, yeah?"

Arthur nodded. Before opening his mouth though, he reached into his deep pocket and pulled out a piece of folded paper. "I'd like you to have this."

He took it, trying to fight off the crease that had formed between his eyebrows as he lifted the edge to read it. Arthur sat quietly, his hands on his thighs, watching the blue roses around their iron bench. Clearly, the last half of the letter's ink hadn't fully dried, meaning that it had been written in chunks. The writing was scratchy and rushed, but it wasn't unreadable as Alfred flew through the content.

"With that in mind, I hope you can forgive my transgressions. If you didn't find me suitable to stay here, you can dismiss me, and I wouldn't object. You need someone to stand at your side as the queen, after all, and if I cannot do that to your satisfaction at this early stage of our relationship, I understand that I am not suitable for the position at all.

You are looking for a queen in as little time as possible – I can see it in every move you make. especially this week we have been apart, you have been spreading out your time with everyone still left in the competition. I realise that many of the other Chosen can give you what you need – what Spades needs, within a much shorter time period.

I'd like to stay, of course. Perhaps have some time to sort things out between us, but if it's not possible, then once again, I understand. If you decide to let me go before we have that conversation, once again, I'll accept it. But I must at least thank you for these past three months. It felt as if I was living in a dream for most of them, and I doubt I'll feel anything close to that, at least, not for a very, very long time.

Thank you for giving me the magic of a first love."

Alfred had to fold over the letter after reading that sentence. Though the last time he'd been gut punched, it had left some impressive bruises, but it hadn't felt like that. Coupled with the sight of Arthur's green eyes – more prominent underneath the tinted colour of the streetlight – looking at him, he couldn't hold it in.

"Are you leaving?"

Arthur's thick eyebrows knitted together in confusion; clearly this wasn't the reaction he was expecting. "Pardon? Is that not your call to make?"

"Yeah, but…the note. Sounded like you were about to go."

"Well, I'm assuming that after a major fight, when there's not much place for error, that having a significant argument with you would ruin my chances," Arthur said, folding his arms. "I'm not sure how the outdoor trip with Alfonso and the other person you eliminated went-"

"Sorry," Alfred followed suit by hugging his arms to his chest, "I don't want to talk about that."

Arthur's face closed off. "…No, I understand that."

What he's saying doesn't match the words in his letter at all, Alfred thought to himself, trying to fight away the memory of the hour long conversation with the eliminated member in his head. The relationship hadn't worked out, simple as that, but from what he'd observed everyone seemed to assume there might be a hidden meaning behind it.

"So why did you write me a letter?" he asked out loud. "I'm serious. I don't quite get it, I'm bad with this sorta stuff."

At the same time, he was desperately trying to read the atmosphere for once. Arthur flinched, his body turning away, meaning that he had missed something – but what was it? Between the words that had obviously taken a lot out of him to write, let alone give to him, to the silence that they were sharing, there was a gap between his outer façade and his inner thoughts, as always. Usually they'd be in the form of an easy denial, or an embarrassed look, but this time it was different.

Alfred decided to default to his teasing, hoping it would bring back some of the old behaviour he was familiar with. "I'm kinda dumb, so I don't get it."

No response.

His right leg twitched, not sure how to deal with the unbearableness of their silence any longer. "It's okay to talk, you know. Just because you're so in awe of my presence doesn't mean you have to not talk all of a sudden!"

Still no response. This was getting way, way too awkward for both of them, and he still didn't know what to do. The usual jokes weren't getting him to respond, so maybe he had to step up the pressure. "Aren't you good at this kind of stuff? Talking, and everything. It felt better when you were kinda an old geezer, we both know that and your feelings and stuff, so maybe you could use some of the fancy stuff in your letter to-"

"I bloody know what I'm good at," Arthur retorted sharply, twisting his fingers in his own shirt as he did so and cutting off Alfred's babble, "And being in a relationship is not one of them. So do forgive me if I'm not my usual self when it comes to that."

Crap. That wasn't what he'd meant to say. Not at all.

"Hey, I…" Alfred reached out for him, gently nicking the inside of his elbow with his finger. Feeling like he only had one chance to not screw it up, his breath hastened, and he spoke faster. "I'm…I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have made fun of you like that. It's just that I'm used to laughing stuff off, but you were being honest. I shouldn't have laughed your feelings off. I'm sorry."

Well. That was unexpected. Arthur's head moved slightly to the right, taken off guard. He'd expected Alfred to carry on, to continue to tease him for daring to be truthful, but by the way his voice sounded strained, it sounded like a sincere apology.

"This week's been…hard, if it wasn't obvious," Alfred exhaled. Taking a minute to slow down, his voice became quiet, falling into step with the music of the night. "But I think both of us know you can read me well enough. So, if we could talk, that would be great. I don't wanna avoid you anymore and not understand what you're feeling."

Arthur's shoulders stiffened, finally meeting his gaze. A storm swirled in those green eyes, something that obscured his entire thought process, but just like the center of a hurricane, Alfred could barely make out a fraction of what he was holding back.

A sigh, and then he spoke. "I…meant everything I wrote in the letter. I did." Arthur paused, as if he was waiting Alfred to interrupt. For once, when he didn't, he continued to talk. "I just can't get it out into words. I'm not sure why I can't, or why I'm so reserved, as you said."

"It's not necessarily always a bad thing," Alfred said. "On the job, people are looking for someone who's more put together than a wild kid like me. They look to people like Ace Matthew and Jack Yao when the country's in a pinch."

Arthur made a noise that was caught between a snort and a laugh. "Says the person who keeps on doing well in every aspect of the Deciding. Not to mention Spades, like the rest of Cards, is slowly recovering."

"Huh? I mean I get the second bit, but whaddya mean about the first?"

"Your outside dates have only been getting better and better," Arthur said, "I've been paying attention, though we've had a disagreement looming over us. You said in the Broadcast the other day that you felt that you didn't plan enough, yet those segments get far more attention than the other programmes, and they're talked about far more. If you hadn't planned them enough, I don't see it."

"I get a lot of help," Alfred said, though a smile was worming its way to his face. "Everyone knows the country's going nowhere without the people that support me."

"I understand that, but none of that matters if you can't keep the Chosen and the audience entertained," Arthur said. "Not to mention you have a group of people so willing to aid you when you ask. Your brother and you are close, your Jack is your adopted family and it's rare for a Joker to be so attached to the country they're serving."

"I guess, but…" Alfred paused to look at his closed off expression, which changed as he reached out to place his hand on the metal next to his. "You have a support system here too. You have Em, Leon, Sakura, and I think you and Alfonso are close, too?"

After he'd acknowledged it with a nod, he kept on going. "So it's not just you going at it alone. You have friends-"

"Which is a bloody miracle in itself."

"Ha ha. The Jack and Ace and Joker are here to help, and you have Miss Anna too, and the guards, and…"

Alfred could briefly see Arthur's chest heave. "And you?"

Whatever he was about to say next hitched in his throat. For the second time in the night, he didn't know what to blurt out immediately.

Out of the blue, the glaring chinks in Arthur's walls presented themselves to him. His hand had shifted away, stuffing themselves in his pockets, and his legs were crossed together, facing in the opposite direction from Alfred's body. His head was pointed downwards, yet his eyes were looking into his, asking a genuine question, something that he was able to discern a moment later.

Did he still have Alfred's support? Did Alfred still want him to be here? Did he want them to work through their issues?

He decided to answer it as true to himself as he could. Alfred reached out, calloused fingers running themselves over Arthur's cool hand, entwining their fingers. Arthur's eyes shot from Alfred's face to where their hands were now joined.

"Yeah, me, too," Alfred breathed, the sound hiding away in the summer evening. "I'm here for you, Artie. Whatever you need, as long as we work through it together, I think we can handle it. If you mean what you said in the letter, I wanna work through it. Together."

"What, just because that's what heroes do?" The listlessness in Arthur's voice told him that it wasn't just teasing.

"No, it's because I like you!" he exclaimed, but he was careful to keep his tone light, to not confuse his messages again. "I wanted to make it clear, with kissing you first. Or something like that, I hope it worked. Even if stuff changed, it wouldn't change the fact that I like you – if I didn't, maybe I wouldn't think that our problems would be worth working out, right?"

Arthur's fingers tightened a little on his knuckles, and his chin lifted slightly. "I…perhaps. But I must ask – why did you not forcefully seek me out?"

Alfred shook his head. "That's not how I wanna do things. Stuff like this should come naturally, and though yeah, I wanna complete the Primary Suit first, rushing into crowning a queen and a king isn't anything anyone wants."

"Ah. I appreciate that. I'm not…good at social situations," he gestured beside him, "So your patience means a lot."

"Let's take things slowly, all right? One at a time. I wanna give you all the time we missed. Is that okay with you?"

"Yes, that's…" Alfred wasn't sure under the cover of the faint streetlight whether Arthur's expression had perked up, but by the tone of his voice it had sounded like it. "I want to work for this relationship, too. I hope you can understand. So about the whole coming clean about the extent of how we've gone, how would you like me to improve?"

Alfred's eyes widened slightly, and for a moment he didn't know how to respond. Being asked for his opinion, let alone someone actually being able to do something about it, was rare. "Uh…I, uh, I don't have any solid plans, but what about you? What's the limit you want to reach?"

"Well, from the other Decidings I've studied, there has to be a media presence somehow. I can't run from it forever. I'll do my best to practise my behaviour at the Broadcasts." It felt like he was holding back something else, but this time, with their relationship on the line, Alfred had to press further.

"There's something else you're not telling me."

Arthur opened his mouth, probably to give him a harsh barb, but remembered the situation they were in and let out an exhale instead. "Very well. I – forgive me for saying this, but I was thinking if in the future,"

"Yeah?"

"Fates forbid I get closer in the contest, and even go the whole way…I'll be subjected to even more media coverage. For that possibility alone, I'll improve. But you have to give me time, Alfred. I hope you can understand that. And, er, a warning. If there's something crucial that you think you'll have to say."

"Okay, that sounds…fair enough." A tiny flicker of heat had run its way through his cheeks at the thought of being with the person who had occupied his thoughts but not enough of his time this week, but he'd cross that bridge when he came to it. "But what if I blurt stuff out?"

The corners of Arthur's lips visibly perked up, even if it was just a little. "As you said, Alfred, I can read you well enough at this point. I understand if some things are beyond your control, or on the impulse of the moment. This is just…I'm trying to improve. Not just for your sake, mind you, but if we are to have disagreements, we should solve them like this."

"You're making it sound as if you've read a textbook on this…"

Sputtering had never sounded so nice in Alfred's ears. "You…what's wrong with doing a little prior study on things I don't know?! Wait until we start the formal lessons, then I'll show you my expertise on things I do know!"

About to launch into another tirade, he stopped when he heard Alfred's warm laugh weave itself through the night air. It went on and on, the pleasant rhythm syncing with Arthur's heartbeat as it did so, its own brand of magic.

"Sorry, sorry," Alfred chuckled, lifting his glasses and wiping at his nose. "It's just that…we're back to normal, y'know? And I'm glad to talk to you about stuff again. It's great. Fates, you're great. So I'm happy we got to talk. Let's keep on working hard on this, okay?"

Arthur's head fully lifted from its drooping position, and he gave Alfred's calloused hand a squeeze. "I'd like that."