i am so sorry but yes im going on another trip pls punch me

also i practically don't have any prewritten chaps left since school, motivation and traveling has sapped a lot of my time and strength. so i'm very sorry ;n; but i'm not giving up

as always, i do not own the selection nor hetalia. these belong to kiera cass and himaruya hidekaz respectively. disclaimer for arthur getting a little bullied .-.

"You were in there for a lot longer than I was," Alfred said, clapping a hand on Matthew's shoulder with a shit-eating grin.

God, half the time he wanted to punch his brother was because of this.

"Well, I'm sorry that I didn't want to disturb you, high prince," Matthew shot back as they walked back up to the first floor of the palace. "But whatever. You planning something for tomorrow? The Elite might not be happy that you've chosen to not spend time with them today."

"I don't know." Alfred said tersely, mood suddenly turning serious. "I mean, with the whole thing ending pretty soon I'm not sure if everything's gonna be okay, with the Trials and everything…"

Does this mean he's interested in choosing Arthur? Matthew privately wondered as they walked past the Drawing Room, where he could briefly hear the chatter of the Elite, accompanied with a few laughs. I mean, after what's happened I'm relieved that he's got a choice. But he does have a point…

"Brother, look…it doesn't matter right now. What you have to focus on right now is just making sure that your final decision is fine with you. There's no rush to end it-"

"No, there is for me," Alfred blurted. "I…I think after that, that I know what to do now. I have to go talk with Yao about what's left to do."

"Eliminating someone is really the next thing you should do now." Matthew said firmly, not wanting to sugarcoat this on any level. "It'll make sure that less people's hopes will be dashed."

His mouth pressed into a firm line, blue eyes narrowing in concentration as if he were focusing specifically on something. After a moment, he hesitantly turned to face Matthew.

"I think we should check on Yao first, though-" he said, but his brother cut him off, shaking his head.

"Hey. You've got a lot on your plate right now. Maybe you should just focus on the Deciding right now – you know that's what Yao would have wanted. I'll check up on him now, all right?" He clapped a hand on his shoulder.

"Uh, okay," Alfred said reluctantly. "Give him my best, and tell him to take a break."

"Yeah. Stay warm."

The two of them bit back their losses and turned on the other side of the hall, walking away to wherever their lives demanded of them next.

"Prince Alfred!" voices blurted out as soon as he backtracked and entered the Drawing Room with a smile as calm as he could manage. Marianne sharply tore her gaze from the window and arranged her hair, Emma smoothed out her skirt and beamed at him, Alfonso stood up from his chair with a grin. Arthur tipped his head to one side, closing his book, their gazes meeting for a moment before Arthur's expression shifted from one of relief to one of concern.

That surprised him. To know that someone could see through his guise so seamlessly…it wasn't to say that he was a little intimidated.

"Hello, everyone," he said cheerfully, picking a couch and settling himself onto it. "How's everyone dealing with the cold?"

"The coat I wore the other day – you were right, it really does suit me!" Emma sang, doing a twirl. "It keeps me super snug."

"Yeah, me too," Alfonso said cheerfully. "I went to visit Butterscotch the other day, and the stable hands even let me groom her!"

"Psh," Marianne snorted. "What you two did doesn't compare what I and the prince did the other night,"

Alfred tried his best to ignore Arthur's bewildered expression, and simply smiled as he did, acknowledging everyone as best as he could. But a seed of guilt planted itself in his heart as he looked away a little, and he made a mental note to speak to him privately later.

"Hey, guys," he laughed sheepishly. "Okay. There's nothing special planned for today, but lessons are cancelled since the Jack isn't feeling too well today, but other than that everything's normal today."

"Are you free today?" Alfonso piped up.

"Uh, since the Trials are coming up soon, I have to do a lot of paperwork to make sure that all of you are safe before anything happens. I just want to make sure Jack Yao has less work, so I'm not really free today, sorry. If you want to do something together tomorrow, we'll talk about it. But for today, relax, and practice on your own if you think you need it." He risked searching for Arthur's gaze for a heartbeat, and to his surprise their eyes met.

The deflated atmosphere of the group was palpable, and Alfred desperately hoped that no one would follow him out of the room. To his dismay, though, no sooner had he closed the doors had they been flung open.

But it wasn't who he thought it was going to be as he turned around and Arthur's jade eyes fixated him with his green gaze.

"I wish to speak to you," he said quietly, and pulled him underneath the sprawling staircase that led to the royals' rooms.

"What do you want to talk about?" Alfred said, removing his gloves as Arthur approached him, thick eyebrows scrunching cutely for a moment before Alfred stashed the gloves in his pockets. Is he upset about those dates? Ack! "UH, uh, about the dates-"

"I'm not angry about that, Alfred," Arthur said, his voice muffled. He turned to face him directly under the darkness of the sunset. Shadows had already cast against the banister, and with a small fascination Alfred realized that his gaze had already been roaming over the light painting itself in rays against Arthur's face.

"You know why I had to, Arthur," Alfred said, flushing a little out of embarrassment. "My duty in this…"

"I'm aware that all these interactions took place before our, um, reconciliation," Arthur said haltingly, shifting on his tiptoes. "I know it's your duty to attend these dates until the process ends. But that doesn't mean that I'm a…I can't be a little wounded about all this."

"No, no, I get that you would be. But that doesn't mean that you meant any less to me before we talked to each other again. I shouldn't have without considering your feelings first, Artie…you know why."

"Alfred," Arthur said. The prince's breath stilled as he took his hand in his, shyly interlocking their fingers before he spoke again. "I know you're doing the best you can. It wasn't you that made up this competition – how many years ago?"

"Dunno. It's been here for many kingdoms, a bunch of generations, as far as I can remember." Alfred squeezed Arthur's hand in return, suddenly aware of the softness of the sensation. "It's the rules of this game. It's not fair, because I know not everyone gets to see me as real, as a full person instead of sharing myself with everyone else."

Alfred's heart gave a jolt at this, and the pair fell silent for a while. They had only been in this sort of situation a handful of times, but like this, this - atmosphere was something else. It wasn't anything like what he was expecting this meeting to go at all. In the silence, he could practically hear his heartbeat going a million miles an hour.

"Alfred…I know what you're showing me, now, is real. Even though you try to hide a mask, I," he looked away, blushing a little, seeming unsure of himself. Alfred reached out as if to reassure him, grazing before Arthur moved close and allowed his calloused touch to trail down to his elbow.

"I think…I think that you've subconsciously showed me your true side without even knowing it. The guise, the masks are off now –it's just you trying…you're just trying to be yourself."

"Well…well, heh," he stammered, taken off guard. His guise of being Cards' golden boy had really caught up to him, hadn't it? He'd been wanting to wear it to kingship, hopefully, but…welp, there it went. Going to be missed? He wasn't sure with the person in front of him...

"Uh, do you like it? The – full, I guess? - me?" he said sheepishly, rubbing against the small of his back. Arthur's face fell into one of the most breathtaking smiles that Alfred had ever seen, and he couldn't help but fall for Arthur all over again. "I, uh, know I've been getting worse over the weeks, but…"

"Hush, of course I do," Arthur laughed, bringing his other hand forward to caress Alfred's cheek with gentle fingers. "For someone who doubts themselves as much as you say I do, you shouldn't be doing that to yourself."

He wasn't sure what made him move first. His own heart, swelling with undisguised, emotion or Arthur's green eyes, brimming over with unspoken love. He really shouldn't have done it, seeing that it was only a few days since they had reunited. But it was in that moment that he felt a little less afraid.

"Neither should you!" Alfred exclaimed, swiftly clasping his hand closer to his cheek. "As in you shouldn't doubt yourself any more. Even if…even if it's too soon, that your feelings for me haven't fully come back yet, even if you hate me and reject me this very moment, I need you to have that in your heart even if I can't be in there." he said tenderly, taking a deep breath before saying the next sentence. "I don't l-love you for anything else but yourself, Arthur."

His cheeks heated up remarkably as soon as the words flew out of Alfred's mouth, highlighting those adorable freckles. He almost said it. Did he? He means it, does he? He was going to say it, I know he was, I swear to the Fates…

"I…I, umm, I didn't – don't expect that sort of praise," he said bashfully. "I…I don't even know if you think I'm good enough for you-"

"You're not just good enough for me," Alfred said, taking a bold step forward and reaching out for Arthur's other hand. There was a pregnant silence, and then he entwined their fingers together, bare palms brushing together in the smallest of kisses.

"You're so much more than that." And with that, he felt Arthur's arms snake around his shoulders and tickle the ends of his golden hair teasingly, removing his glasses before Alfred's arms slid around his waist and pulled him closer, reveling in the musky scent of books and – roses? – as one of Arthur's hands fell against his chest and kissed him. They were so close that Arthur could feel the flutter of Alfred's eyelashes against his own and the thrumming of his heartbeat against his fingertips as Alfred's mouth melded against his.

He could feel Alfred's nose brush alongside his cheekbone as the other boy tilted his mouth to deepen the kiss. He shifted closer, Arthur's hand stroking his hair and letting out a soft gasp as –

Loud noises from beyond the corridor made the couple break apart, panting for air, but Alfred's protective arm lingered on his waist, instinctively keeping Arthur close.

"What? Alfred, what's wrong-" Arthur mumbled, embarrassed by the intimate contact, but Alfred shook his head, his expression panicked, and pulled him so that they were directly underneath the bannister, carefully hidden behind the steps.

"T-there's someone," he said in a low, shaking tone. "If it turns out to be one of my advisors, h-he won't like seeing us like this. I won't let you get h-hurt again."

With a pang, Arthur remembered that night and the scars on Alfred's back, the ones that the advisors had given him for standing up to them. He knew it wasn't done just for him, but for the Elite, but it was done with him in mind, after all. In an act of trying to reassure him, he laid his hands against his chest as frightened blue met reassuring green.

"I won't let you get hurt either. Not for everything that we've been through…together."

A loud sound echoed, horribly close, and Arthur whirled around, eyes darting around. However, it was only the Drawing Room doors…it seemed like they had missed the person in the haze of their emotions.

"Alfred," Arthur said, gently pulling the other boy out of the cranny. "It's fine, there's no one left. I'm here, I promise-"

An earsplitting scream came from inside the Drawing Room not a moment later, and suddenly the two of them were running, flinging open the doors and facing a terrified group of four people.

oagebreak

Marianne, one hand carefully covering her mouth, a tinge of surprise in her glacier – blue eyes. Alfonso had slumped onto an armchair, a look of horror on his face, but Emma had completely bowled over on her knees, hands covering her face as the advisor held his hands over his back almost in apology.

"What have you done to her?!" Alfred growled, his hand carefully blocking Arthur's way. He couldn't let him hurt anyone else, especially not him.

"Emma, what's happened?" Arthur shouted, coming to stand beside Alfred. "Was it you that-"

"He's gone, Alfred! They…they…killed him!" Emma screamed, tears pouring down her face. "He did nothing wrong…he was so young, he…!" she gulped before continuing to cry in earnest.

"Your-Your Highness!" blurted the advisor, intimidated by Alfred's sudden fury. He hadn't been able to act like this since the beating, but damn well he needed to protect one of his Elite. "I didn't do anything to her, I swear on the Fates!"

"What in Fates' name happened, then? I order you to tell me now!"

"They…the rebels…they took, they took her little brother!"

"…?" Louis, Arthur thought in dismay. The little boy standing next to Dylan on the night of the Halloween party. Emma's brother. What had they done to him?

"They took them from Lady Emma's home last night – they murdered him in cold blood. The family were very distressed, Your Highness, very…"

Alfred paid him no attention as he knelt down to support Emma, who almost immediately latched onto his shoulder and began sobbing onto his shirt. Arthur shifted onto the armchair next to Alfonso, which they both shared dismayed glances.

"Are they still in Spadian territory?" Alfonso blurted, his gaze still firmly fixed on Emma.

"They were carving out around the Spades – Diamonds border when we found the body. They were threatening that they would disrupt something if we didn't leave them alone, just before they crossed over into the woods where our troops couldn't reach…"

"What was it?" Alfred said coldly, although you could hear the tremor in his voice.

"That they would disrupt the Trials and take the strongest one alive."

The room erupted with voices as soon as the advisor spoke.

He means me, Arthur faintly registered the thought in his mind. Alfred knows that. Fates, he's going to be too shaken over this-

"…take the Elite to their rooms, please. I'll visit them each shortly after I talk with the Jack and Ace," Alfred said quietly, his face falling.

"They've already been notified, Your Highness. I'll go find them now," the advisor said, hurriedly running off, clearly not going to find the people to send the Elite back into their rooms.

The prince looked defeated for a moment, before turning to face the other three except Emma.

"Can you please go back to your rooms, where it's safe? I'll ask your maids to bring you dinner tonight there. Ple…please ask them if there's anything you need." He took Emma's hand, and with that the two of them left together, Marianne flouncing out behind him.

"Art…can you come with me? I don't like this atmosphere," Alfonso grated out after a moment.

Arthur nodded, following his best friend as they closed the door and went out into the cold night.

"He's changed a lot over these two weeks," Alfonso said, watching Arthur pace around the bedroom floor agitatedly.

"He seems a little more subdued than, well…how was your date? You know." Arthur asked quietly.

"Huh? Wha…oh, I'd rather not say," Alfonso said uncomfortably, rubbing at his mole. "I know you didn't get a chance to spend time with Al and his horse, so…"

"No, it's not an issue," Arthur smiled, but was a little upset internally. It wasn't losing time with the horse that he was disappointed in himself with; it was losing time with Alfred that was his main frustration. "I was just curious about what you and Emma were so excited about."

"Ah…she can be really boisterous about this, right?" Alfonso cracked a grin, patting his friend's back. "Sometimes I think she's going to claw him out of anyone else's reach!"

"Yes, well…I guess she's just a girl in love. People will do anything…?"

"Yeah. But not for themselves, for the person they love." Alfonso's voice took on a glassy, faraway tone, and in that moment Arthur could see everything that could go wrong.

Alfred's voice, proclaiming his affection for another, the touch on his shoulder as he asked him to leave, the harsh reality of someone else standing next to him…

It was overwhelming. And it hurt.

Badly.

"Hey, Art! You okay?" Alfonso asked, jolting Arthur back to present day. Not some future that he didn't ever want to see.

"Oh. Yes, yes, I'm fine," he hastily amended, patting his friend's shoulder.

"Uh, so…I was thinking of getting back to my room anyway. Just in case the prince comes to check on me," Alfonso laughed. "But you'll be all right?"

"You do have a point," Arthur smiled. "I'll see you tomorrow, Alfonso. See you."

"See ya, Arthur!"

He was left alone to deal with the conflicted emotions of the day as Alfonso carefully closed the door and the room was silent once more.

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REPLIES ARE COMING I SWEAR I JUST HAVE TO FINI

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