Sword and the Stone

Merlin had been floored as to the part of Morgana's life that she'd hidden from him, not out of malice. He supposed it was a sort of embarrassment. Or need to be seen outside of a pampered life style that he assumed her father had tried to give her. It was very different from her first incarnations or any of her previous reincarnations. He let her lead him into the sitting room. Arthur followed behind. In the room he saw what looked like Uthur and Agravaine sitting on sofa's facing each other in front of a fireplace. Morgana quickly dropped his hand.

"Daddy!" she smiled.

"Morgana, darling," Uther beamed.

He quickly embraced Morgana before letting go.

"How has work been? How are you? Is..." Uther rambled.

"It's been splendid, really. And this is my... friend, Merlin. I hoped you wouldn't mind," Morgana responded.

"Not at all."

Uther turned his attention to him.

"How do you do, sir?" Merlin forced out.

"Good, yourself?"

"Good I should say."

"This is my brother, Agravaine, as well."

Agravaine gave him a curt nod that Merlin reciprocated. Although Uther maintained a pleasant smile, he could see the sort of bitterness behind his eyes. Of course, this was some random man that his daughter was bringing around.

"And what do you do Merlin?" Uther said.

"I'm the head librarian at the King's College in London," Merlin responded. "I'd been in charge of a bookstore prior to that."

"Of course Morgana would go after a book worm," Arthur smirked.

"Arthur," Morgana hissed.

Arthur walked over to the stand that had the drinks on it, clearly intending to make his own. Merlin felt relief that he wasn't being asked to do it. This Arthur did look strikingly familiar to his own, although this new one had more brown toned hair and it didn't look as blond. The structure was about the same.

"Arthur, would you mind pouring me a brandy?" Uther said.

"Yes father," Arthur responded, trying to hide the annoyance in his tone.

"Would you like anything Morgana? Merlin?" Uther asked.

"Can you find my red on there?" Morgana asked.

"I can," Arthur said.

Uther looked at Merlin.

"I'm good, thank you," Merlin said with a forced smile.

He was older than anyone here. He had the ability to raise storms, conjure magic, never die. It felt oddly like his own Camelot, if he was ever entertained the idea of being a person worth noticing beyond a servant. Arthur being the one to serve everyone, nearly everyone, was fun. Oh, how his Arthur would die at the idea of ever doing a menial task like this for anyone. Arthur in his last year, actually, maybe wouldn't have minded. He tried to not ponder it. Morgana tugged on his hand and they sat on the couch next to Uther across from Agravaine and Arthur. The four of them went on about politics, about Arthur and Gwen, and about Morgana briefly before she effortlessly spun it back to Arthur and his relationship with Gwen.

Uther was just delighted that one of his children would be getting married and offered to have the family realtor look into an area of South Africa for properties that Uther liked for the couple. Arthur was pleased. Merlin wondered how well that would go with Gwen's opinions. The patriarch did however question Arthur if he would marry Gwen soon, and this was something Arthur was sure of. It didn't escape Merlin that Agravaine seemed to be hiding a look of distress behind his mask. The maid, Lillian, came in and told them that dinner was ready to be served. Morgana clutched at his arm.

"Are you okay?" he asked her, holding them back from following everyone.

"I think I'm fine, Merlin," she said.

"Alright."

Somehow he wondered if Agravaine was behind something. He had to be. Agravaine never looked trustworthy no matter the incarnation! Morgana, he knew, was no lightweight. He'd inspect the red Arthur gave her on the way out. That, or her anxieties were high although she'd never had a problem with them before. In public, that was. The dinner was a roast pork, mashed potatoes, various greens, some sort of bread, the entire table was filled and he thought it looked strikingly similar to the feasts that Uther would have in his past life. Agravaine, Uther and Arthur talked about politics for a while with Arthur having the more liberal views. Uther was rational enough to deny that he wasn't as conservative as Arthur would think he was. Morgana looked at him with pained eyes, don't say anything. Then Morgana was in the hot seat. And Uther dragged him into it too.

Uther grilled Morgana about her life's choices, her job, Merlin. And he swore he saw the lights flicker rapidly while Morgana screamed at her father in defense. The difficult part about living for a thousand years was that it caused him to faze himself out of the now. He could see the situation intensifying, but he couldn't process the words. Then a number of lights burnt out.

"I'm sorry, but Merlin and I must be leaving. Thank you for dinner," she said coldly.

He waved at Arthur who gave a small wave back, before following Morgana out the door. The moment the door closed behind them Morgana fell to her knees letting out a pained sob. Merlin sat next to her and she rested herself against him.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," she said.

"Don't apologize," he said.

"I thought he would like you. Bloody even like me. And... and I thought he'd be more civil and I wouldn't have to feel bad about showing you my family and that's all I can do."

"Mortal affairs don't concern me."

She looked at him with confusion and a bit of resentment. Still, he drove her back home.

He walked her up to her flat. She'd seemed distant since they'd left the dinner and he didn't feel it was safe to leave her alone. If he did, he worried if she'd get into her head and let every bad thought consume her pretty head once more. She brushed past a concerned Mordred too. Her body seemed jilted as she sat on the couch.

"Want a cuppa?" he asked.

She nodded her head. He started the tea. Earl? Peppermint? The pot started boiling and he grabbed whatever came into his hand.

"Why do you say weird shit like mortal affairs?" she asked him as he sat on the couch next to her, passing the cup of tea.

"Because I'm not," he said.

"Hogwash."

"It's true. That story I told you, about you being a lady, that was true as well."

"You mean to tell me that I'm a reincarnated Lady you fell in love with once?"

"Yes. And I fell in love with you all over again as you are."

The tea shook in her hand.

"I should... I should tell you that you have magic. Real magic. You've always had it," he said.

"That's supposed to explain why things happen when I'm..." she forced out.

"Yes."

"How are you immortal then? You've... well, you're in daylight. A lot. So that rules out a vampire."

"I'm a warlock. When I failed my task, I was cursed with immortality. But I was always meant to be."

"So... you could teach me, about magic?"

"I can."

"Will you?"

"Yes."

/

She finished her tea and went to wash it. Morgana glanced up to see that Mordred was playfully assaulting Merlin. They seemed to enjoy each other more now. Sometimes she wondered what Mordred would look like as a human since he never really acted like a cat. Merlin stood up and Mordred gave a painful yew.

"See you in the morning?" he asked her, he put his hand on her waist and kissed her.

"Could you stay? Please?" she asked. "I know it's probably asking for much since I made you stay last night as well..."

"You really want me to stay?"

Morgana nodded. His head shook as a smile came across his face.

"Fine," he said, definitively. "But stop hogging the blankets."

"I do not hog the blankets!" she retorted.

He laughed and picked her up from under her knees before carrying her to her bedroom. Her back hit the mattress and she caressed the side of his face as he loomed over her.

"You weren't really going to leave... were you?" she asked.

"I was praying you wouldn't let me," he said.

He kissed her softly.

"Merlin," she whispered.

"Yes my love?" he responded.

"I want you."

She kissed him and started to tug off the bomber jacket he'd kept on. He responded a little confused, indulging her in a kiss before pulling away.

"Morgana..." he said, his voice breathy.

"I want to make love to you," she said.

Merlin tried to treat her gently. He said something in a rough tone that made the lights turn themselves off. And she initiated speeding up the pace a few times. They shared control. Feeling. She kissed him roughly, pushing him under her with the everlasting desire to consume him. To consume something so whole and so pure. Then he'd remind her again. It wasn't about consuming the other until destruction. Because it felt like becoming whole again in one body.

He'd fallen asleep quickly after, wrapping her in his arms. She delighted in the feeling, unable to sleep. His steady breathing soothed her. So she entertained sleep. She walked slowly approaching a woman with wild black hair that sunk on a marble throne in darkness.

"I WANT HIM DEAD!" the woman screamed, looking up.

And Morgana was horrified to see it was herself. And she saw ruin and destruction and torture following the actions of this past self. Once in these dreams she enjoyed feeling as if she was a lady, someone who was just. And since Merlin had come into her life, had felt nothing but anxiety in these dreams and witnessed committing atrocities. There was nothing but doom to follow. She hated that the visions she'd had previously, of a scared girl, of a woman that wanted to do right, had become a mad woman. A woman so engulfed in hatred and in fear that she had forgotten the true meaning of helping other people. She dreamt she was chained in a pit with a white dragon looking up for eons for the white light that was out of reach.

She woke up feeling tears dry closely to her eyes. The blankets were at their feet and she felt herself shiver. Slowly she crept out of bed and tried to find where she had thrown her underwear. It would take too much effort trying to pull on a robe or her jams. Her breath was shaking as she climbed back into the bed and pulled the blanket up to cover her form.

"What 'ere you doing?" Merlin asked, waking from his slumber.

"I... was grabbing my underwear," she said.

"Huhm?"

"We fell asleep after..."

"Oh... right."

He looked up at her, a bit puzzled.

"Oh no, I've woken you up now," she said, her voice trembling in anxiety.

"No, not at all," he said.

He caressed the side of her face with his fingers.

"Were you crying?" he asked.

"Perhaps," she muttered.

"Would you like to talk about it?"

"No, no you should go back to sleep."

"Morgana."

Her lips pulled in and she tried to not continue crying. He pulled her close to him and stroked her hair.

"I shouldn't trouble you with my anxieties," she said.

"I said I would always be here for you, so tell me," he said, his tone demanding.

"I've just... my dreams, visions, of... what I'm sure is my past life. I'm not good any longer. I keep bringing destruction, wrecking havoc. And I think about what my father said tonight and... I'm a fraud, Merlin. I'm not a good person I don't have a pure heart. You should leave me and find someone else that would appreciate you better and love you better. Someone... that isn't going..." she choked up.

She started sobbing into his shoulder.

"You are not your past," he said. "And I have always loved you. I will always love you."

"I think you're my equal, my soulmate, and my other half, I mean, I'm a whole person on my own. And I don't think I deserve you," she cried. "If you stay I know my love as unconditional as it is will also turn selfish."

"You act as if I'm a saint!"

"Aren't you?"

"No. I'm far from it. Because at the start of my life... the love I'd had for my friends turned obsessive because I wanted to protect all of them. I couldn't. I will accept your love for as unconditional as it is right now, and for as selfish as it may become. Because I will love you with my whole heart my entire being, because you are all that I want."

She choked a cry as she smiled.

"Thank you," he said.

"For what?" she asked.

"For saying that you love me unconditionally."

She kissed him harshly. He wiped away her tear with his thumb as he kissed her back. His hands roamed her body and she let her hand feel his as well. He laughed.

"What is it?" she asked.

"What time is it?" he laughed.

Morgana felt for her phone. Her hand outstretched as she tried to keep her body from straying too far from Merlin.

"Four o'clock in the morning," she said.

He kissed her collar bone and grazed her lightly up her neck.

"This is madness," he whispered.

There was an urgent rapping at the front door. Morgana felt Merlin's back against her and the light was bright against her face. The knocking continued. Sunday. She jolted up remembering yoga with Gwen Sunday mornings. Shit, shit, shit. She found a pair of leggings and a loose tank top before running to the door. Shoes. She opened the door to an irritable Gwen.

"You were supposed to meet me downstairs fifteen minutes ago," Gwen said.

"I know, just, I'm sorry Gwen," Morgana forced out.

She slipped on her socks and found her yoga bag, and then found a water bottle.

"Shoes, Morgana," Gwen reminded her.

"Right," she responded.

She grabbed a pair of sneakers and carried them with her out the door.

"So, what really kept you from remembering?" Gwen asked as she started the car.

"Um, Merlin slept over," Morgana said, she found a loose hair tie on the consul. "Like an adult sleep over."

"Shut up!"

"Gwen!"

"I'm just, glad you've found someone you can be happy with."

"Thanks. How's the moving going?"

"Well, we're going to need boxes soon enough. And the people I'd nannied for were being absolute prats about it, but I said a notice was a notice and I wasn't going to stay."

"I'm sorry they had that reaction."

"Whatever, at least I'll be free of them finally. I told Elyon and he was a little upset, so was dad, but they're just trying to be supportive right now. So it means a lot to me that they're trying."

"I'm glad."

"I'm gonna miss Sunday's like this."

"You know, let's make it a girls day."

"Morgana."

"I'm serious. After yoga we'll do whatever you want all day. And then we'll plan a day that's closer to the move and we'll have a packing party."

Gwen hugged her once they got out of the car.

"Just two minutes late," Gwen said, pulling away.

"Then why are we dallying?" Morgana grinned.

After the class she texted Merlin the plans she'd made with Gwen. He said he was happy she was spending time with friends and that he fed Mordred earlier as well. She sighed in relief. Not that she'd expected him to freak out. But it was nice that she could tell him things and he would be understanding. They went to Cordelia's Cafe for brunch which wasn't a far walk.

"So when am I going to meet this Merlin?" Gwen asked. "Arthur told me he met him last night."

"I um, was honestly afraid of if it was really going to be anything. But I don't know, we could plan for a double date if Arthur was up for it?" Morgana asked.

"Definitely."

They gushed over their respective boyfriends with the bottomless mimosas. Although Gwen had pointed out that by the third they had significantly cut down on the alcohol in the drink.

"So what are you really planning on doing in South Africa?" Morgana asked.

"I've been looking into schools that teach fencing or private clubs that do. I'd love to go into the sport more," Gwen asked. "Besides, I'm qualified, certified, and I have an interview with one of the places during the week."

"That's fantastic!"

Morgana insisted on paying for the brunch and then Gwen dragged her into a thrift shop. They did dress up in some awful tacky things and took pictures to send to Arthur. He was absolutely horrified by an ensemble that Morgana had dressed Gwen in, although the laughing emoticon's would've suggested otherwise. They did find a few pieces that could've benefited Gwen in South Africa.

"Let's do the Eye," Morgana suggested as they carried the bags out.

"That's the most touristy thing you've ever suggested!" Gwen said surprised.

"Well, if you're going to leave, you might as well do it."

It was a pain finding parking with Gwen's car before they made their way to the wheel. Morgana had linked her arm through Gwens. The sun had actually come out, she was having a splendid time with Gwen... yet something felt off in her core.

The whole of Sunday had felt off. Morgana had gleefully told him round noon that she and Gwen would be continuing their girls day after the morning yoga class. She just didn't want him to worry if she didn't answer her mobile right away. To him it seemed ridiculous since she knew he didn't like his mobile, or technology at all. Gwen, so he heard about, was a fantastic fencer (which is how she and Morgana had met) and a dear friend. He didn't worry about Morgana's safety with her. And Morgana could defend herself, he knew. Still, he ended up walking down the alleys of London. Half hoping for a sign of trouble.

He had turned down an alley into a relatively shabby nearly abandoned child's park. His eyes darted around trying to figure out where he was. Wandering never did him any good. On a rusted merry go round was a woman with wild blonde hair with a man with neatly kept black hair. He threw a smoke. The woman looked at him. Morgause.

"Go," she told the man.

The man gave him a passing glance before darting out of the park.

"Hello Morgause," Merlin said, confidently stepping closer to her.

"Merlin," she said coldly. "She will come back to me and we will destroy you."

"I've told her the truth. She's not going with you this time."

"You haven't told her she has magic! Have you?"

"How did you regain your memory anyhow?"

"Trauma. I was ten and my younger sister was sick. We heard of a man on the edge of town who had magic and heal people. But you turned her away. I watched from behind a tree. She died and in my grief I found my memories."

"I'm so sorry."

"You're not! You're never sorry!"

She threw a bolt of lightning at him and he raised a shield of fire in front of him.

"I will bring Camelot back and I will be it's queen! Not my stupid brother!" Morgause screamed.

"You know, there's a problem there," Merlin said.

"Oh?"

"You don't know where Avalon is. You can't bring Camelot without it. You can't bring it back without the Isle."

"What are you? High Wizard? I will bring Camelot back and fix it's kingdom!"

Another bolt, another block. Morgause raised the hood of her jacket and threw a much larger one at him. He was too slow to react before it hit him in the shoulder and he fell back to the ground. She stood above him. He wanted to call out to Morgana and tell her he loved her one last time if that's what it came to.

"Morgana is the key, I know that. The side she chooses will be the one that reigns," she said coldly.

"I'll never let you take her again," he said.

"Merlin!" Came a cry.

Morgause looked up and vanished. He could feel himself weaken. Then he saw Morgana above him.

"What the bloody hell are you doing?" She shouted.

"Witch… hit me w… with, I've got hit by electricity love," he forced out.

"Gwen, bring the car closer!"

He tried to help Morgana by trying to walk, but the process was draining.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph, what happened!" Gwen shouted.

"I don't quite know," Morgana said.

She laid Merlin down in the back seat and he let out a small pained whimper. Her hand pulled at his shirt. There was a large scar where he'd been hit.

"Drive back to my flat," she said.

"Your flat? Shouldn't we take him to a hospital?" Gwen protested.

"Whatever it is, only I can fix it."

"You're not a licensed physician! You don't even have any medical knowledge!"

"Gwen!"

Reluctantly Gwen started towards her flat. Morgana sat in the back with Merlin, his head in her lap and holding his hand. She prayed he would be okay long enough for her to heal him when they arrived. Gwen was right, she had no medical knowledge. And Merlin had only just told her about her magic so she didn't know what to do with it to channel it right. So far it had only been destructive, but she hoped that she'd be able to heal with it as well. Gwen helped her carry Merlin inside.

"Gwen, what do you know about witchcraft?" Morgana asked as they put him on her bed.

"Erm, they use candles? To help channel power sometimes?" Gwen responded unsure. "Don't tell me you're going to try something homeopathic when something is wrong with him!"

Morgana looked over at her friend before she sprinted to the lower cabinet in the kitchen. Candles.

"What on earth..." Gwen trailed appalled.

"I'm a witch," Morgana said. "A real one. Not just... god I hope this works."

Gwen helped her light the candles, almost reluctantly as they spread them around the room. She put her hands on his chest where the burn was. Something about that spot felt evil. She didn't know what incantation she had started muttering, at first it had only been calling out to a higher power to heal him, and she heard The Triple Goddess in Irish come out of her mouth. And she focused on cleansing Merlin as she spewed the words. It felt hot. And then she saw him open his eyes and the candles were burning bright in the dark room. At this moment, she knew that whatever honeymoon phase they'd had was over and the darkness would only seek them out more.

"What did you do?" he asked her.

She smiled. And she felt her eyes close and her body give out.

Authors Notes: Okay, bit of a long chapter. Some of those early plants are finally starting to show so I'm really happy about that. (And more plants to come.) Things should definitely start branching out more after this. And Morgana has finally embraced that she does have a past life and have magic! The first fight between Morgause and Merlin was something I'd had in development for a while so the after effects were a bit of a knot to work with. So Gwen definitely knows about Morgana's magic because I thought if Morgana had the support already of Merlin it would help her be more open about having magic and not being afraid. So leave a review if you can, always appreciated. I absolutely love writing with you guys. xx