Happy 2019! Here's to much faster updates and (maybe) finishing this story once and for all!

Before I begin this chapter, I do want to provide some trigger warnings. Unfortunately, it will give quite a lot away if I say what, but just a heads up. There is also some coarse language here, so be mindful of that. Without further ado, let's get this show on the road!

September 3rd, 20xx

When she was a child, if you had asked her what her favorite part of the performance was, she would tell you that it was the moment she opened her mouth and uttered her first note into the microphone. She would say that the one note is how she would draw in her audience. She would captivate them with one note, enticing them to hear more of her. But more importantly, her first note was where she was the purest; it was her first exposure, the very first thing she wanted her audience to absorb from her. She knew that her performance would continue for a while longer, and as an aspiring singer, she wanted to keep singing forever and never cease.

Now, as a twenty-year-old who was had been singing professionally for six years, Utau would say that her favorite part of the performance was the curtains closing.

The applause rang out as she sang her last note once more, but as usual, as most of her audience now had X-Eggs, the applause was scarce, consisting only of the Easter employees. The curtains shrouded her from their gaze, prompting her to sigh dramatically. Without a second glance back at the stage, she exited into her locker room, where her manager was waiting to greet her.

"Omigosh Utau! That was amazing as always!" Yukari Sanjou exclaimed, giggling. Utau gave her a curt nod, groaning quietly as Yukari pulled her into an embrace. Utau grimaced, smelling the whiskey in her breath. She had tried Yukari's whiskey before, but she had found it revolting. Utau simply nodded, forcing herself out of Yukari's grasp.

"The director wants to speak with you!" Yukari called as Utau started to walk away.

"Tell Kazuomi to fuck off," Utau grumbled. "I have things to do." Yukari's wide grin faded as she watched the blonde sashay away.

Utau entered her private locker room and slammed the door behind her, collapsing onto the nearby bench. She pulled off her fur jacket, revealing her black tank top. She dug through her desk drawers, rummaging through the items inside.

"Goddamn it, where is it?!" She turned around angrily. "Oh shit, Il, did you hide it again?!"

"You can't keep doing this after every performance, Utau," Il mumbled. "C'mon, we did great work! We got so many more X-Eggs! Kazuomi is going to be thrilled with this progress!"

"Great." Utau sighed. "Another performance, another extraction of X-Eggs, and another half-assed praise from my step-father. It's the same freaking script over and over. And for what? What does any of this shit matter?" Feeling the cool metal against her skin, Utau gripped it tightly, taking it out of the drawer. She sat on her chair, placing the knife against her arm. She watched the scars dance down her arms; she almost laughed at how ridiculous it looked with all of the abrasions lining from her shoulders to her arms.

Maybe one day I'll accidentally cut my arm off. Utau thought. Then maybe I wouldn't be able to hold a microphone anymore. Good. Il winced as Utau cut the blade into her skin, tensing as Utau cried out from her self-imposed pain. Il's eyes shifted to the egg that sat in the corner, a bright white X adorning the outside.

A knock on the door seized both of their attention. Utau immediately slid on her fur coat and dropped the knife into her pocket, before opening the door. Upon seeing who was outside, her eyes widened.

"Ikuto!" Utau cried. "W-What are you doing here?!"

"Kazuomi wants to see you," Ikuto bluntly announced. His midnight blue hair was messy, covering one of his eyes. Utau wasn't sure the last time he got a haircut; then again, there was no one who would remind either of them to. Utau only took care of her physical appearance because she had makeup artists and hairstylists hired to specifically work with her. His clothing were ragged and looked as though someone ripped through them; she wondered, not for the first time, what he did exactly when they weren't together.

"What does he want?" Utau wondered. Ikuto shrugged.

"Probably to congratulate you for another successful performance, or something."

"Did… did you see it?" Utau wondered.

"No." Utau's face fell. Ikuto raised an eyebrow briefly.

"Wait, is that blood?" Ikuto gestured to the blood on the floor near her chair. Utau turned back, her eyes widening for a fraction of a second.

"Why do you care?" Utau shot back. "You haven't given a shit about me in years." He shrugged.

"That's not…" He sighed. "Whatever. Just go see Kazuomi." He walked away, prompting Utau to let out a sigh she did not even know she was holding back.

"You could be honest with Ikuto, you know," Il mumbled, following Utau to Kazuomi's office.

"Honest how? I don't have any secrets," She grumbled.

"What about the fact you're cutting yourself?!" Il cried.

"What does it matter? Ikuto doesn't give a shit about me. No one does." She walked into Kazuomi's office, not even bothering to knock.

"I've been expecting you, Utau."

"I'm aware. What do you want?" Utau spat.

"Please, be kinder to your father," Kazuomi stood up. "Take a seat." Utau contemplated correcting him, but she decided she didn't care enough, before compiling and sitting down. "As always, you have performed excellently, Utau. The X-Eggs you have created will help Easter extensively." Utau thought about asking exactly why Easter sought these X-Eggs and why after so many years of getting so many X-Eggs, nothing was happening with them, but she didn't care. "There have been reports of some X-Eggs being destroyed, so it is important to keep replenishing them." Utau nodded slowly.

"Is that all?"

"You need to learn more manners. You're a young woman; you behave more like a lady." Utau narrowed her eyes. "But I suppose you may leave." Utau rose to her feet, exiting Kazuomi's office without another word. She exited the Easter headquarters and immediately headed to the nearby bar. She sat down in front of the bartender.

"One tequila," Utau demanded, taking out cash.

"Could I see your card, miss?"

"What?"

"Your card, ma'am." Utau grunted digging through her pockets, and pulling out her wallet. She dug out her fake ID and handed it to the bartender.

"Ma'am, this is fake." Utau raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"I recognize you from the recent program; you're the singer, Hoshina Utau, right?" Utau scowled, cursing under her breath."

"Screw you." Utau stood up from the bar, exiting without another word.

"Hey, you'll be 21 in two months!" Il reminded her. "Then we can have fun and drink what we want!"

"Two months…" Utau sighed. "I can't do that." She dug into her pocket, pulling out the knife. She stood behind the bar in an alleyway, staring at it. It seemed to tantalize her, and not for the first time, she wondered what it would be like to jab it directly through her heart. No one would care; Ikuto didn't give a shit about her and Kazuomi would only find her loss to be an inconvenience for the company.

"I'm not going to end it this way." Utau stuck the knife back in her pocket, and suddenly broke into a run.

"Wait, where are you—" Il floated back behind her as Utau entered the Easter headquarters once more. She headed toward the elevator suddenly, pressing the top level. "Utau-Chan, what are you doing?!"

"I'm done."

"But—"

"I'm tired, Il," Utau grumbled, watching as the elevator doors opened. She stepped onto the roof, feeling the cool air of the night touch her neck. She threw off her coat, exposing her tainted skin to the night sky. Shivering slightly, she stepped close to the edge of the building.

"You can't do this!" Il cried. "What about me?! What about my sister?!"

"I'm sorry, Il. I hope you find a better chara bearer." Utau closed her eyes.

"UTAU!" Il shouted, as Utau leaned backward, feeling her body falling freely, the first time since her father left she could say she was freed.

September 4th, 20xx

An upbeat melody rang out loudly, prompting the indigo-haired teenager to open his eyes and groan. He reached for his alarm and pressed snooze before turning the other direction and closing his eyes again.

"You must awaken," A voice beckoned. "Your mother expects you to be ready to practice in a half an hour."

"It's still early, Temari," He mumbled, his voice level. "I'll get up soon."

"Do you want to disappoint her?" He sighed, opening his eyes to look at his chara. Temari's eyes were their normal red color. She wore a velvet-purple kimono, which looked as if it glowed in the dark room.

"I guess you're right…" He sat up, turning off his alarm. He forced himself to his feet, ignoring his weariness, and exited the room to go to the bathroom. He undressed, and stepped on the scale, feeling his heart beating rapidly in his chest. Upon looking down at the number, he frowned inwardly, redressing and entering his bedroom again. Reaching into his closet, he pulled out a lavender kimono and slipped it on. He reached for the nearby sakura flower hair tie, pulling his long hair into a high ponytail.

Nadeshiko stared at her reflection in the mirror, letting out a sigh. She reached onto her dresser and placed concealer over the dark black bags that ran under her eyes. She frowned at herself, as she applied rosy pink lipstick to match the sakura flowers. She watched as her broad shoulders stuck out from the kimono; she knew it reduced the femininity she tried so desperately hard to maintain. A knock on the door seized her attention.

"Come in." Nadeshiko's voice rose an octave, maintaining the sweetness it usually contained. Her housekeeper opened the door, holding a tray of fruits and an omelet. Nadeshiko felt a wave of nausea, but she concealed this with a polite smile.

"Good morning, Lady Nadeshiko," She greeted, bowing. "I have brought you breakfast. Your mother requests your presence downstairs once you finish eating."

"Thank you so much, Baaya-San." Nadeshiko smiled, taking the tray from her hands and setting it down on her bedside table. "Tell Mother I will be down shortly." Baaya bowed once more gratiously before exiting. Nadeshiko waited a few moments, before grabbing the tray of food. She cast one direction back at the mirror and carried the tray out of her room. Walking into the bathroom again, she dumped the fruit and omelet into the toilet and flushed it quickly, gagging. She could feel Temari's eyes on her, boring into her emotionlessly. Sighing, Nadeshiko took a sip of the water before setting it down and carrying down the tray.

"You ate fast," Her mother noted. Nadeshiko bowed her head, setting down the tray.

"I was eager to begin dancing today," Nadeshiko lied. "There is a lot to go over." Her mother hummed.

"That is correct. You may begin." Nadeshiko stood on the stage, beginning her performance. She ran through the steps as she had trained for many months, fluidly running through every step. While she had memorized the routine, something felt different. As she performed a final twirl, a wave of dizziness swept through her. She caught her balance quickly, hoping desperately her mother didn't catch it. However, her mother was as perceptive as an archer. Nadeshiko finished her performance, panting heavily. Beads of sweat lined her forehead.

"What's wrong with you today?" The older Fujisaki chastised. Nadeshiko bowed her head. "Your steps were all over the place; you nearly stumbled on all of your twirls." She sighed in aggravation. "But most of all, your steps were too aggressive. You were raised to be a woman; you must not let your masculinity seep through. Do you understand me?"

"I apologize, Mother," Nadeshiko whispered.

"You better get going to school, but I expect you to do another run through when you return home. You are dismissed." Nadeshiko grabbed her backpack and quickly went to the bathroom to change before leaving without another word.

"Why can't I eliminate my masculinity?!" Nadeshiko mumbled under her breath, clenching her fists. "Why is it, no matter how hard I try, I cannot be the woman my mother desires?!"

"Because you're not a woman." Nadeshiko froze for a moment, just outside of her school. Her eyes widened as she looked up at her chara, for once not seeing the redness in her eyes. "You're a boy. You're Nagihiko."

"Temari…?" Immediately, the warmth from the chara vanished; her eyes flashed red again. Nadeshiko sighed.

"I know that what happened to you is my fault… I'm so sorry, Temari. I wish I knew how I could undo this." Frowning to herself, Nadeshiko strode forward, entering her high school with Temari in tow. She could feel multiple eyes on her, but she looked straight ahead.

"Ah, Fujisaki-San!" Nadeshiko turned, facing another student. "You look lovely today. I love the top you're wearing." Nadeshiko beamed, though she frowned inwardly.

I look awful, what are you talking about? She thought bitterly.

"Thank you so much, Wakana-San! You look lovely as well!" Wakana beamed, but her smile waned as she quickly turned around. Nadeshiko watched her briefly, sighing.

"Wakana used to be so much more cheerful in elementary school," Nadeshiko mumbled to herself, kneeling by her locker. "I guess having your heart's egg turned into an X-Egg really does a number on you…" She cast a side-glance at Temari, before grabbing her books from her locker.

"Good morning, Nadeshiko-San." Nadeshiko glanced up, smiling as she faced her best friend. "How are you doing?"

"I'm alright. How are you today?" Nadeshiko greeted. Her smile softened. "How was the family thing you had?"

"It was alright." Tadase sighed. "I mean, it's hard having family events now after my grandma…" He sighed. "I guess I should be thankful that my family is still connected. I seldom see my mother's side; besides seeing my cousins in class, I'm not very close with my uncle." Nadeshiko nodded slowly. "Oh, I did want to discuss some X-Egg stuff with you."

"Do you have any new leads?" Nadeshiko asked, following Tadase to their first period classroom. He sighed, shaking his head slowly.

"Hoshina Utau had a concert yesterday, and she extracted more X-Eggs than usual," Tadase explained. Nadeshiko frowned.

"We're going to have do something about it." Tadase grimaced.

"We can't… we can't keep making crushing X-Eggs a habit." As they walked past the gymnasium, Nadeshiko absentmindedly watched as the kick-line team ran through their routine. They looked flawless, their act running smoothly. At the end of the line stood Yaya Yuiki, her auburn hair tied into a low ponytail. Their eyes met, and Yaya gave a curt nod while Nadeshiko smiled briefly back.

"We can't just leave them lingering. That could help Easter more," Nadeshiko began, turning back to her friend. "We still don't know exactly what Easter is doing with all of these X-Eggs, but no doubt they're more powerful with these X-Eggs. You saw how powerful Ikuto that time was we fought him." Tadase's eyes darkened. "Besides… leaving hearts' eggs indefinitely as X-Eggs will hurt the children more than simply crushing them, I would imagine." Nadeshiko quickly added the last part.

"I guess you're right, but it still feels wrong." He sighed. "We've been at this deadlock for six years, but there has to be a better solution." Nadeshiko nodded in agreement, as they entered their math classroom. Nadeshiko took her usual seat in the second row of the classroom. Her eyes met the person's next to her for a brief second, before quickly averting her gaze, not wanting to pursue conversation.

As the bell rang and the teacher began lecturing, Nadeshiko felt her mind wander. She thought back to her performance this morning, wondering what exactly went wrong. She knew her steps weren't gentle enough; she put too much force in them as a side effect of her lack of 'femininity'. This had been something she had worked tirelessly toward; she knew that acting masculine would defy her mother's wishes and make her a poor dancer. But what she couldn't explain was the dizziness. She had been feeling more lightheaded recently, Nadeshiko noted, but never during dancing.

"Fujisaki-San?" Nadeshiko glanced upward, surprised by her sensei's attention. "Do you know the answer?" Nadeshiko's face reddened; she seldom ever spaced out in class. She stared at the equation on the board, analyzing it quickly.

"It's 4x," Nadeshiko replied smoothly.

"Great job as always, Fujisaki-San!" Nadeshiko beamed. "Does anyone else know what happens when we take the integral of the second term?" The room fell silent. "How about you, Mashiro-San?" Nadeshiko turned to face the girl beside her. As per usual, Rima had a bored expression on her face, her large hazel eyes filled with no emotion.

"I don't know, and I don't care," Rima bluntly responded.

"Alright Mashiro-San, that's detention for you again. After school, right here." To Nadeshiko's dismay, Rima looked completely unaffected. In fact, Nadeshiko could have sworn she saw the blonde girl smile for a split second. She couldn't fathom how Rima made it into honors courses, let alone Advanced Calculus; she never seemed to care about anything, no less her education. All Nadeshiko knew about the petite girl was that she joined the guardians for a split second while Nadeshiko was studying abroad, and she had a large flock of fanboys around her at all times. Sometimes, she would date one of them for a few weeks before bluntly dumping them. She was considered the Ice Queen; beautiful from the outside but impossible to penetrate. This was quite the glaring opposition from Saaya Yamabuki, whom clung to a new boyfriend every time she got one.

The bell suddenly rang, jolting her back to attention. She chastised herself; she was not usually this spacey. She followed Tadase out of the classroom and headed to her next class.

By the time it was lunch, Nadeshiko had felt extremely exhausted. Sighing, she adjusted the strap on her backpack as she walked down the hall.

"Nadeshiko-San!" She turned, smiling as she faced Tadase. "I was just about to head down to the cafeteria. I have some more stuff I wanted to discuss about X-Eggs and Easter."

"I definitely want to hear more, but I was going to go to the library. I have a lot of work to catch up on," Nadeshiko explained. "We'll work more on the X-Egg stuff soon, okay?"

"Yeah…" Tadase sighed. "Could we meet in the Royal Garden after school?"

"My mother wanted me to come home after school to practice my dancing," She told him, apologetically. "I'm around tomorrow, so we can definitely discuss more then. I know there's a lot to be done." He sighed.

"Yeah… It's hard, just doing this as the two of us. I wish we had more guardians behind us." Nadeshiko nodded slowly. "But I understand you have commitments today. I'll see you later, Nadeshiko." She smiled, waving as Tadase headed downstairs.

"Why does he care so much, anyway?" Temari wondered. "It's literally been six years with no progress; doesn't he quit?"

"I admire his dedication, actually," Nadeshiko noted, walking into the library. "Tadase will never give up in something he believes in. He is passionate about saving the hearts' eggs. I know we aren't guardians anymore, but it's still really noble." Nadeshiko sat down in front of a computer.

"But you don't care."

"Of course I care!" Nadeshiko protested.

"Not nearly as much as he does. It's not your priority." She sighed.

"Even… even if this doesn't matter as much to me as it does to him, I won't leave him. It's only the two of us working as he just said. Souma-Kun hasn't given the guardians a second thought after he graduated. Yuiki-San has long moved on; I'm not even sure if they have their charas anymore. I wouldn't leave my best friend hot and dry like that." Nadeshiko groaned suddenly, her head beginning to hurt. She placed a hand to her forehead, but it felt normal.

Nadeshiko's headache prolonged for the rest of the school day. By the time the last bell rang and she stood up to leave the classroom, Nadeshiko felt dizziness run through her again. Groaning, she made her way to her locker, taking out the necessary books for home. As she walked home, she contemplated asking her mother for the day off; she did not feel well at all.

I can't quit. I need the practice, Nadeshiko thought to herself, biting her lip. I need to be better.

As Nadeshiko entered the door, she was immediately greeted by Baaya. Nadeshiko smiled kindly to her housekeeper, bowing her head politely.

"Is everything alright, Lady Nadeshiko? You look awfully pale."

"Ah, no need to worry, Baaya-San." Nadeshiko smiled. "It was just a long school day; I'm fine. Tell Mother that I will be in the practice room once I change." Baaya nodded, as Nadeshiko proceeded to her bedroom. She undressed from her school uniform and through on her kimono. Again, she stared at her reflection, a soft sigh escaping her lips.

"When will I look like a woman?" Nadeshiko grumbled, frowning inwardly.

"Are you ready?" Her mother wondered as she entered the practice room. Nadeshiko nodded, clutching her fan in her hand. She stood on the stage, readying herself. She could feel the constant pounding of her head, lightheadedness sweeping through her.

I'm fine. She had said that to Tadase earlier; she had said that to Baaya just a few minutes ago. She said that to herself every day.

She scraped the air with her fan, beginning her routine. She tried to make her steps as delicate as possible, her mother's chastising ringing in her ears.

"You aren't good enough."

"You need to be more womanly."

"You disappoint me."

Nadeshiko twirled around, her dizziness becoming even more apparent. She stumbled over, as she felt the whole room shaking around her.

"Nadeshiko?" Her mother called, but it sounded distant. Nadeshiko could hardly breathe anymore. Voices were ringing through her mind, voices that sounded familiar yet faraway. He saw a vision of a familiar girl, her eyes widened looking desperate as she gripped her—his—hand.

I wish the world forgets my existence!

"Amu-Chan?" Nagihiko croaked before he hit the ground, the world turning black.

Good news: I have the next chapter done and the chapter afterward has significant progress. Expect one more update before I go back to school next week! I'm going to keep writing however and, hopefully, I can have more updates throughout the semester. This might be insane, but I really want to finish this story this year. I think it's time we moved on to different things; moreover, I've kept you guys with updates every six months for a long time now, so it's time to accelerate things.

Also note: I used the year 20xx to denote whatever year this whole story has taken place during. It started in 2015 and now we're in 2019, so who knows what year it really is. Just because I'm slow as heck at updating, that doesn't mean that time has passed as it has in real life. Also note that Renaissance Part I ended around late August, so take that as you will.

Anyway, thank you all so much for your reviews! They mean the world to me and even if I suck at responding to them, I am really touched by them.