Atlantic City, New Jersey

Sue Ellen felt ill as she stood backstage at Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City's convention centre and the home of the Miss America pageant; she was preparing for the biggest challenge of her life. "Have you been eating too much?" Patricia asked as she helped her daughter into the sparkly silver dress. "No mama, of course not" she'd been the same weight since high school and it knocked her self-esteem down a little more every time her mother picked at her appearance, she was never enough. "Mm, well this dress is a little tight. I told you that after you finished college and stopped cheerleading regularly, you'd have to be careful about keeping your figure, your best years are now and you're not getting any younger you know" she gave the same speech that she'd given a million times before and Sue Ellen tuned out. "Maybe after the pageant you should move back home. I'll make sure that you eat properly and you can go running with Kristin and help her practice her cheerleading; it's a win-win situation", Patricia may have believed that it would be the best scenario, but Sue Ellen wasn't so keen. The last thing she wanted to do was move back home; her mother would drive her crazy, she already did now and they didn't even live together. "We'll discuss it after the pageant mama" she sucked in and her dress zipped up, she was convinced that the seamstress had made a mistake in alterations, it had fit perfectly before and she was positive that she hadn't gained weight.

"Fifteen minutes ladies" a stagehand informed the contestants of their schedule and Sue Ellen's stomach dropped again, she felt sick at the idea of competing and losing and having everyone know that she'd failed. There was nervous and excited chatter amongst the other contestants and Sue Ellen was reminded of her competition; the other girls were gorgeous and perfectly poised, she had a big challenge ahead of her. JR arrived backstage and noticed how pale Sue Ellen looked, "are you alright darlin'?" she looked up and weakly smiled, she doubted her own abilities now more than ever. "I'm fine, just fine" she put on her best pageant smile, completely fake confidence, but outwardly, no one could tell. Patricia and Kristin left to go find their seats and JR took her hand as they lined up with the other girls and their escorts. The music began to play and they filed out on stage, Sue Ellen was more confident with JR at her side, but the sheer size of the venue was just another thing on her mind. There were over ten thousand people seated in the audience and this was not her territory; only a small handful of spectators were there to cheer for her, the rest couldn't wait for her to mess up and be eliminated. JR could feel her hand shaking as they walked onstage; he had no idea she got so nervous at these events, she had no reason to. She was everything a pageant queen should be and he'd already guaranteed her a place in the top sixteen, though he hadn't informed her of his interference. She had insisted that she had to do this on her own, and she would; but there was no harm in making sure that she was successful, all it took was a little Ewing magic.

The preliminary round consisted of the talent competition, eveningwear, swimwear and an onstage question. Sue Ellen sang wonderfully, but so did the other contestants; she looked elegant and graceful; but so did the other contestants. By the time the swimwear competition started, she was apprehensively confident and a little confused by her emotions, she knew that she was doing well, but her scores were being compared with forty-nine other girls who had all done excellently too. The swimwear competition had the captured all of the escort's attention from backstage, fifty beautiful girls in a skin-tight fabric, it was a man's dream; though they were gentlemen and they'd look, but never touch, not in public at least. JR admired the women as they walked onstage; Sue Ellen still had that wonderful sweet, shy, sexiness that had been so appealing to him at the Miss Texas contest. He admired the other contestants too, just because he was here for Sue Ellen, didn't mean he was blind to the other women in the room; no one came close to the whole package that Sue Ellen offered, but it was enjoyable to watch them put their best selves forward. The final category was the onstage question; Sue Ellen listened to the other girls answer and was quietly confident; her own chances of making the top sixteen were improving by the minute.

"…Miss Oklahoma, Miss Kansas and Miss Texas" the host announced the top sixteen finalists and Sue Ellen smiled as she stepped forward; she was getting closer to the crown and she wasn't so nervous anymore. The preliminary competition had gone well and she was now in with a real chance of becoming the next Miss America. It scared her a little bit that the pageant was televised and if she lost, people that she knew in real life would witness her failure; she pushed that thought out of her mind though and prepared herself for the rest of the pageant. JR watched as she regained her confidence; he had guaranteed that she would get at least this far, but he was fairly sure that his 'donation' had nothing to do with it, she really had gotten here on her own.

"…and the tenth finalist is, Miss Louisiana", Sue Ellen felt faint, as if she were going to collapse; her worst fear had come true, she hadn't made the finals and her downfall had been televised for everyone to see. She was shocked and felt humiliated; everyone in her life had told her that she was a shoo-in for the Miss America title, yet here she was, standing on stage in the back row, the row that only meant one thing, she'd lost. As the music played and the other eliminated contestants exited the stage, Sue Ellen took one last look toward the audience, a final farewell to her life as it had been; Miss Texas, known and loved by many, now just a memory. "Damn", JR was shocked, he'd been unable to guarantee her anything more than the top sixteen but was sure that she'd be good enough to win on her own. The final scoring system was ranked, not determined by percentages like the earlier competition and he had only been able to influence two judges on the panel; he was powerless after a certain point. He hadn't been worried about it; he was a judge in the Miss Texas contest and she'd outshone all of the other contestants, he was sure that these judges would see it the same way. He had obviously miscalculated something though and he was angry with himself now; this wasn't even about Sue Ellen anymore, it was about him, JR Ewing never lost, especially in business and this was just another form of business.

Patricia was sure that Sue Ellen would make the finals and it came as a complete shock when her name wasn't called as part of the top ten; Sue Ellen had obviously done something wrong, she should have been Miss America and now her chances were ruined. Her mind ran though the consequences of this loss; Sue Ellen's social status would drop and would heavily affect the rest of her life. The lack of a relevant and current pageant title would cause her appeal as a named model to drop and she'd probably not get her contract with 'Her Style' magazine renewed now, both would negatively affect her personal income. With all of the consequences, especially the lack of social relevance, the list of prospective husbands would become smaller and smaller as she aged; JR Ewing had to propose soon or else her daughter may just be destined for life as a spinster.

Sue Ellen held back tears as she exited the stage; she wouldn't let the other girls see her cry, she would hold her head high and when she was alone, then she'd reveal her inner emotions. "I don't know what they were thinking, but you should still be up there, you were fantastic" JR did his best to comfort her, but he was still angry that he hadn't been able to fix the competition himself; they could have avoided heartbreak if she'd won. Sue Ellen couldn't process too much right now, instead just collapsing into JR's arms and burying her head in his shoulder, not crying, but not saying anything either. Patricia made her way backstage, "what happened? Why are you not in the finals? What did you do wrong? You must have made a bad impression on one of the judges. Or maybe one of the other girls made too much of a good impression on the judges. I bet that's what it is; the competition is rigged, you were wrongly eliminated. It has to be that" she rambled on and on and JR wasn't sure whether he should say anything. "JR, if another girl could influence the judging panel like that, why didn't you? I thought you cared about Sue Ellen" she blamed him and now he was angry, "Mrs Shepard. I know for a fact that that judging panel is not being influenced by anyone on the outside" he didn't want to outright say it, in case someone was listening and especially not in front of Sue Ellen; she didn't need to know that he'd paid for her place in the top sixteen. Patricia noticed the tone of his voice and realised that he'd done exactly as she'd suggested another girl had done, she just didn't understand why her daughter had been eliminated now, surely a man as wealthy as JR Ewing could afford the cost of influencing a panel of beauty pageant judges. JR cut the volume of his voice to a quiet, almost whisper tone; "the final competition is determined by judges rank scores of the girls, not their percentages. You can't guarantee anything with that kind of system, especially with only a small amount of ins on the panel", Patricia knew that he was confirming his involvement; he'd done everything possible, but it wasn't quite good enough. Sue Ellen didn't hear a word of the conversation; glassy eyed and completely dazed, she remained in the position she'd taken as she walked offstage, in the comfort of JR's arms.

Sue Ellen had had to snap out of her disorientation, it was time for the crowning and all of the contestants were required onstage. The third and fourth runners up were announced and she politely clapped, though she wasn't completely paying attention. "No more Miss America!" there were shouts from the balcony seats and Sue Ellen spotted a small group of protestors being escorted out of the building by security. Sue Ellen had read one of the brochures distributed by the women's liberation group; she was surprised at how many of their ideas she agreed with, though she'd never voice her opinion. The things the group were against were the very things her mother had taught her to live by. She was a contestant in the pageant, but she often felt like a cow in a cattle auction herself. "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of Miss America 1968 is…" Sue Ellen's attention was turned back to the stage but she soon stopped listening, she didn't want to hear it; she didn't care anymore, it wasn't her night and it would never be her night again. As the audience clapped, so did the contestants; no matter how distraught each girl was about not winning, none of them showed that side; they all politely congratulated the new Miss America.

Sue Ellen turned on the shower in her hotel room and stepped inside the stall, the warm water ran down her body and the salty tears ran down her face. She was finally alone and allowed herself to express some of the negative emotions she was feeling. She needed to cry, her life was over, she would be a nobody once she passed on her Miss Texas crown next month, and all of the benefits that came with her title would soon disappear. She cried not only for the loss of the competition, but for all of the things she was losing as a consequence.

To be continued…