Dallas, Texas

"Sue Ellen", Miss Ellie smiled and waved her daughter-in-law over toward the table by the pool, they were alone together at Southfork and now seemed as good a time as any to continue their discussion from a week and a half ago, "join me for some iced tea?" Sue Ellen smiled as she sat down at the table, she was happy and content, everything seemed to be right in her life again, and all of a sudden, the monotony of her daily activities was less bothersome. Instead of worrying about what she was going to do with her time or having someone to talk to, she found herself thinking about the time she and JR had been spending together and counting down the minutes until she saw him next. Although she had never lost her focus, it was now more pronounced; she was constantly working and thinking of ways she could improve herself so that he was pleased with her when he did see her again; she loved when JR payed attention to her, it gave her great satisfaction to know that he cared and appreciated her efforts. Her former problems felt like a distant memory right now and she assumed that the way she had been feeling a few weeks ago was just a hurdle in her life, one that she had overcome and she no longer had to worry or think about. With the Ewing barbecue next weekend and her extra DOA activities, she would be occupied for a good while, and then it would be Thanksgiving, the start of the holiday season and the beginning of a full social schedule for her and JR and the rest of the Ewing family.

Since the accident, her imagination and hope had come back to her; no longer did her thoughts and fantasies about her life with JR seem unrealistic like they had in the past few months, now, they seemed as if they really were possible and hopefully probable. With the way JR had been acting lately, it gave her hope that her fantasies about the kind of life she had always wanted, and specifically, the life she wanted with JR, were finally realistic. She had a husband and family who loved her; they were more than financially stable and they lived in a lovely home; she had her health and her youth; she had a good circle of social acquaintances and activities to fill her time; and with any luck, she would make new, real friends when she had a child. The temporary loneliness she had been feeling was just that, temporary; there was so much more waiting for her in the future and for the first time in a long time, she actually felt good about the reality of her life. Her renewed sense of hope and her new positive outlook on life made her feel optimistic and happy, and with the renewed frequency of their marital activities, she hoped that she and JR could give her mother, Jock and Miss Ellie the news they'd been waiting for. With Christmas just three and a half months away, it would make the perfect occasion to give their families the news of the ultimate gift. The way their marriage had been lately was what she could only describe as perfect, and a child, namely a son, would be the icing on the cake, the one thing that would complete and validate their life as a married couple and her place in the Ewing family.

"It's a beautiful day isn't it?" Sue Ellen commented on the weather not just because it was a conversation starter, but because she really thought that things seemed brighter and happier lately. "It is. Southfork is always beautiful, but I think I love the late summer and early fall the best", Miss Ellie decided that it was best to get all of the introductory comments out of the way before she approached the subject that she really wanted to talk about. However, as they spoke, covering a lot of different topics, Miss Ellie began to question whether she was doing the right thing in planning to ask Sue Ellen to continue their conversation from before the accident. Sue Ellen seemed so happy right now and she would hate to be the one to ruin her mood by reminding her of her less pleasant thoughts and feelings. Her thoughts were brought into the present moment as Sue Ellen spoke, "have you decided what you'll wear for the barbecue yet? I was thinking of going into Dallas tomorrow to do a little shopping; we could make a day of it if you'd like to", Sue Ellen smiled and hoped that Miss Ellie said yes. In the back of her mind, she knew that she didn't really have any friends, so she compensated with the companionship of her husband and her in-laws, however, that didn't even cross her mind as she asked, she really did enjoy Miss Ellie's company. "No, I haven't, and I'd love to, but unfortunately, I can't tomorrow. Punk and Mavis are redecorating their home, so Mavis and I are going to look at new furnishings tomorrow; she wants a second opinion before purchasing a few things. Punk's exactly like Jock, he'll give you hell about furniture or décor that he doesn't like, but only when you've bought it and placed it in the house already. So in an effort to avoid that mistake again, the next time you have to buy something for the home, you suggest going shopping together, and then all of a sudden decorating is a woman's job again", she laughed as she finished speaking, though she felt bad as she watched Sue Ellen's face drop. "Oh", Sue Ellen subconsciously spoke before faking a laugh at Miss Ellie's story and attempting to hide her disappointment behind a false smile. "That's ok; the barbecue isn't until Saturday. Perhaps we could go later in the week?" she gave a weak smile as her mood deflated.

She felt silly as she realised that she was jealous of the friendship Miss Ellie and Mavis had, they were close friends and so were their husbands; she didn't really know the history behind their relationship, but it seemed nice that Jock and Miss Ellie could spend time together even when they were spending time with their friends. For a moment, she found herself wishing that JR had more friends, or even just one real friend, one who was married and they could do couple activities with; it would have made her life easier if she already had an established social circle to join when she became his wife. However, JR didn't seem to really do the whole friendship thing, but unlike her, he had a lot of people and things in his life to occupy his time, she doubted that he was lonely or dissatisfied, he never appeared to be. In all the time she had known him, and from the stories she had heard about his life before her, it didn't appear that JR really considered anyone to be a real friend. He had business and social acquaintances, he had his family, and as much as she hated to think about it, before her, he had a long list of women to 'keep him company'; but none of those people were close enough for him to just hang out with and therefore include her in his plans. As much as she hadn't wanted it to and she didn't think it had reason to, the loneliness she had been feeling before the accident was starting to return; she wasn't as satisfied with her life as she had tried to convince herself that she was.

"Sure, I'm only busy tomorrow; though on Friday I'll be busy here, getting all the last minute details sorted for the barbecue. How about after the DOA meeting on Thursday?" Miss Ellie watched as Sue Ellen's mood improved when she proposed a new time for them to go shopping; before the accident, she hadn't fully realised just how co-dependent Sue Ellen was, but she did now, and it seemed awfully sad. It wasn't that she minded going shopping with her daughter-in-law, in fact, she enjoyed spending time with her, but it seemed sad that a twenty four year old woman's best choice for shopping companion was her mid-fifties mother-in-law. Truthfully, they had little in common apart from their family connection; they didn't even really share the same taste in clothing, so it screamed lonely when Miss Ellie was the closest thing to a friend that Sue Ellen could find. It was clear from the way she spoke that she had no close friends, or anyone of her own age that she could call when she wanted to make plans. However, she really believed that Sue Ellen had a lot to offer in a friendship and had the ability to be truly happy if she could find the self-confidence and independence to make a few changes in her life. "After the DOA meeting on Thursday it is", Sue Ellen felt temporarily happier as she and Miss Ellie made plans, but the loneliness that she had been burying and ignoring was beginning to return; she would never admit it to herself, but she needed more than just JR's love and attention. Miss Ellie watched Sue Ellen as they talked, it appeared that there was a lot going on in her mind right now, but somehow it didn't seem the time to say anything. She had a feeling that questioning Sue Ellen about her life choices at this moment in time would be more harmful than helpful; though that didn't mean that she didn't plan on having that discussion with her at some point in time, it seemed like a necessary step.

To be continued…