Dallas, Texas

"Mhm", Miss Ellie nodded in agreement as JR spoke, although he was missing a large chunk of the problem, she was pleased that he at least acknowledged that Sue Ellen had feelings and wasn't always the happy girl she tried so hard to pretend she was. "I agree. Now, I have a fair idea of why she's been so up and down over the past few weeks, however, I'd like you to think about the past few months right now. Imagine being Sue Ellen for a moment, think about how she spends her time, what she does and who she does it with…" she paused as she watched JR, he looked confused, though he hadn't interrupted her with a questioning comment yet, so she continued to speak, "now, think about your own life over the past few months. If you were Sue Ellen, how would you feel about your involvement in her life? I'm not talking about the last few weeks, after the accident, I'm talking about the months preceding that event", she finished speaking and waited for him to think about what she had said. She knew JR, if she just came straight out and accused him of neglecting his wife then he would shut the conversation down immediately, however, if she allowed him to come to the conclusion himself, then he would be more receptive to the conversation, or at least she hoped he would, JR was an unpredictable man.

JR listened to his mother and grew annoyed as she spoke so vaguely, this wasn't the conversation he'd been hoping for, though he couldn't say that it wasn't somewhat enlightening. "Mhm", he nodded, it seemed as if his mother had the same idea that he'd had, though she blamed him for it and he didn't like that. "Mama, I don't want to believe that her condition has returned and truthfully, I'm not sure that it has, because this time seems different to the last time. However, if she is in that kind of state again, then I think I had better call Dr Danvers, because it's no longer something I'm qualified to help her with. I know you think that I didn't really do anything to help her, but that's not true; after she returned home from Austin, I did everything in my power to make sure I didn't burden her with my issues or let her stress herself out worrying about me. If that's what her issue is now, then I can't be held responsible; and if those aren't the things fretting about, then I don't know what her problem is; she doesn't work, she doesn't have to worry about supporting herself, she has a wonderful family support system and she occupies herself with her hobbies. If she has problems with those things, then that's beyond my control. I have provided her with everything she needs and wants and I try hard to make sure that she never has to deal with anything too serious. As far as I can see, I did my part to try to resolve the problem, but obviously my efforts aren't good enough", he was frustrated and defensive, he really felt as if he were being attacked and he needed to argue his way back into the winning position, he didn't like feeling like the loser. He had come looking for a simple informative conversation, but what he'd gotten was a guilt trip, or, at least that's how he felt, as he thought back on their conversation, he realised that his mother hadn't actually explicitly accused him of anything.

Miss Ellie listened to JR as he spoke, although she didn't agree with his sentiments, his response wasn't exactly surprising to her. In his eyes, he probably had done everything that he could do, however, he didn't quite see the situation the same way that she or Sue Ellen did, he didn't understand that a successful marriage was hard work and it took more than putting in a bare minimum effort in to make it work. Being in the same room with his wife wasn't the same as spending time with her, withholding huge amounts of information from her didn't mean that she didn't still worry about his issues and want to be there for him as a supportive wife, and dismissing her issues as unimportant or non-existent did nothing to help her. She took a deep breath and paused as she thought about how to respond, she didn't want to say something too harsh and have JR walk away from the conversation with an attitude and a further diminished lack of empathy for his wife; Sue Ellen needed JR on her side, especially now. She was fairly sure that Sue Ellen was pregnant and the answer to JR's question about her mood swings was tied to that condition, but with JR coming to her for answers, she had thought it would be a good opportunity to open the discussion about the deeper issues in their marriage before she told him of her suspicions. However, she was beginning to wonder now whether that had been the right decision or not.

"JR, calm down, I'm not accusing you of anything or saying that your efforts were worthless, I'm just asking you to empathise with your wife for a moment. Ewing Oil makes you feel important doesn't it? It gives you something to focus your time and energy on and you're always thrilled by the challenges it presents, right? Now, think about Sue Ellen; that girl loves you, and I know you think her hobbies fill her time, but they don't, not really, and on top of that, they don't satisfy her in the same way your work does. She would do anything to make you happy and she puts your happiness and being a good wife to you as her number one priority in life. I'm not trying to make you feel like a failure, because I know you think you've been trying hard and it's been working well, and I'll admit, in recent weeks, yes, things do seem to be good between you two. However, you need to understand that she feels everything and takes everything personally. You pay attention to her for a while and she gets her hopes up that it will always be that way, so when you get busy with work and begin to spend less and less quality time with her, she falls hard. Again, I'm not saying it's your fault, because I more than anyone understand the demands Ewing Oil puts on a man, I'm just pointing it out to you so that you're aware of how her mind works. I care about Sue Ellen and I want her to be happy, but you have to understand that her version of happiness is directly connected to the relationship you two have; her hobbies, the family and her material possessions are important to her, but they're secondary in comparison to how she feels about you. Does any of that make sense?" she looked at him and hoped that at least a small part of what she had said was getting through to him; Sue Ellen deserved a husband who cared about her as much as she cared about him and right now, their relationship was unbalanced in that area.

JR sighed, all he had wanted to know was whether his mother had noticed Sue Ellen's mood swings, but instead of that simple information, he'd been given a lecture on marriage and how in her opinion, he wasn't being the best husband he could be, something he disagreed with and still didn't completely understand her perspective on. "Yes mama, I understand that and I really do try my best, however, as you said, Ewing Oil is important and I cannot always dedicate my full time and attention to my wife, no matter how much I would like to. I've also explained my reasoning behind why I can't share certain parts of my life with Sue Ellen, because as history has proved, it's not good for her to know everything. I hear what you're saying though and in future, I will try to be a little bit more empathetic toward Sue Ellen; I suppose I just have a hard time finding the right work/life balance". His mind wandered as he spoke the last few words, that was really his problem, he had spent his entire life trying to please his father and that meant putting Ewing Oil first in every decision he made. That had worked fine for him for the first twenty-eight years of his life, however it had all changed in 1967, and now, four and a half years later, he had a wife, a dependent wife, and he still wasn't completely used to being married and having to think about another person when he made decisions in his life. It was as if he was being pulled in two directions and the choices he made never seemed to be able to just happily coexist with each other. If he focused on pleasing his father, then his relationship with Sue Ellen suffered, and if he focused on Sue Ellen, then he had less time to think about business, and he risked losing his father's trust and dependence, something he never wanted to happen, especially with Bobby involved in the company now. In his mind, it wasn't even a real argument, he had been indoctrinated into thinking that Ewing Oil was the most important thing in the world and his hard work was completely justified. If Sue Ellen truly wanted to be a good wife, then what he really needed her to do was be quiet and support him, not start causing a fuss about having a husband with important responsibilities.

Miss Ellie nodded, she sensed that JR was about as close to a real understanding of the issue as he was ever going to get, and that he did seem to be genuinely open to at least trying to improve his marriage, and for now, that was good enough for her. "Good, I'm glad. As I've told you before, marriage is a long, hard, difficult road; but it's also wonderful. Your biggest problem with Sue Ellen is communication, please don't take this offensively, but neither of you are great communicators, which means that small things tend to grow into bigger ones, even when they don't really need to. That young girl loves you, and I think you love her too. I'd hate to see that fall apart because of a small miscommunication problem. However, I trust that after our conversation, you're now a little bit more receptive to opening up the discussion and changing a few things", she smiled at him and he gave her a weak smile in return. Looking around the patio, JR felt awkward, he'd gotten answers to his question, though he was more confused than ever. His mother's words hadn't done anything to ease his mind about the possible return of Sue Ellen's former emotional condition or whether her recent behaviour was something else entirely. She had even alluded to having an idea of what the current problem was; however, desperate to leave the conversation, he decided not to question her any further. "Thank you mama", he nodded before standing, "I think I'll go and see whether my wife is awake yet. Perhaps take her out for dinner later", he tipped his hat and smiled before he left the table and walked back inside the house.

To be continued…