Decision

35. Offer

Azula examines the man standing in front of her. He looks well groomed, well kept, and has a dangerous glint in his eyes. She subtly steadies herself for a fight while keeping her eyes fixated on the man illuminated by pale moonlight.

"So," she purrs, projecting more confidence than he ever could, "now that I am asking the right question, what exactly is it that you can do for me?"

He smirks. She narrows her eyes.

"Everyone in that palace has a secret or three," says the mystery man. "I can give you what you want most if you report them back to me."

"And what exactly is it that I gain from espionage?" inquires Azula, crossing her arms.

"I can make you the power behind the throne, Princess Azula. Don't you want that power without the Avatar ever knowing?"

She bites her lower lip.

36. Uncertain

After finishing her conversation with a man she learns is a representative from the New Ozai Society interested in palace secrets, Azula slinks back into bed beside a gently snoring Ty Lee. She sighs slowly, trying to steady her heartbeat.

Lying there for ages and ages, Azula toys with the crystal the shaman gave her as she contemplates the offer. It is, in fact, a difficult one to pass up.

But is it worth the possibility of being caught?

How can she avoid altering the Avatar within minutes of gaining her greatest dream since she was a child?

The man said no one would ever know, but Azula has no idea if she can trust that.

She stares at the crystal in her sweaty hand as the sun rises over the Fire Nation.

37. Wasted

Two nights later, Azula and Ty Lee handed Izumi to a babysitting Mai and Zuko and Azula is officially blasted out of her mind trying to forget about the offer she has been obsessed with every hour of every day. Ty Lee brought home two bottles she snatched from her sister's birthday party and the moment she kissed Azula and got out the glasses, the princess could not resist like she usually would. Not when she cannot stop thinking about if giving palace secrets to the New Ozai Society would benefit her enough to be worth it.

It's been an hour of copious drinking.

Azula messily kisses Ty Lee to shut up her drunken ramblings. Ty Lee tangles her fingers in Azula' hair and draws her into an even deeper kiss.

Princess Azula pours Ty Lee another drink as soon as the kiss breaks.

"You don't have to get me drunk," giggles Ty Lee. "I will sleep with you."

Azula laughs. Ty Lee has never seen her like this before, wasted, out of control. Through her double vision and giddy attitude, she still sees that Azula like this is somehow extremely disappointing. Common.

"Little slut," Azula teases with a smirk.

"Nah," drawls Ty Lee with a bright smile. "Yuh-you're the slut."

Azula shoves her and Ty Lee snaps back laughing.

Zuko walks in halfway through another sloppy half of a makeout session.

"You guys are having fun," comments Zuko, unable to conceal his discomfort and disgust.

Azula cackles and points a wobbly finger at Ty Lee. "She is going to sleep with me tonight."

"Yeah, I don't mind doing charity work," jokes Ty Lee with a loud giggle.

Zuko cannot help but laugh as Azula fiercely and bitterly scowls.

38. All We Ever Wanted

Azula and Ty Lee hold each other all night, madly in love like they both secretly dreamed they would be since they were children. It is something next to perfect.

But in the morning they are hung over and sober. It takes ages to make Izumi stop crying and Azula sets her down on the bed, sitting by her and gently holding her little hand to keep her quiet. It is necessary when she has such a splitting headache.

Ty Lee finishes vomiting in the bathroom and cleans out her mouth before walking into the bedroom to see Azula's tenderness with a daughter they share.

Azula looks up. "Do you ever think about the things we used to want? During the war."

Ty Lee shrugs one shoulder.

"I guess I try not to. It doesn't matter anymore. I mean, I think what I wanted most was a family with you and now…" She smiles at Izumi and strides over to touch her raven hair. "Now I have that, princess. I can't complain."

"I wanted more than this," says Azula, frowning bitterly. "So did you. Do not deny it."

"Yeah, I mean I did…" Ty Lee's heart beats a little too fast.

"I wanted power. I wanted to reign and it was my right. I was destined to be in power and I lost that for the pettiest reasons. I am not going to stop wanting that just because I got you back and got knocked up. How could I? I seethe half of the days. My depression…"

"Your depression is just part of your illness, princess. You know that," insists Ty Lee and it takes every ounce of love in Azula's ice cold heart to not put her hands around Ty Lee's neck and squeeze.

"My depression is because this is not what I want. This is not the life I wanted."

"There isn't anything we can do about that." Ty Lee tries to caress Azula's face but Azula knocks her hand away a little too forcefully.

"And that is the problem. So tell me… do you never once feel sad or upset or angry that you lost the war? You never once have regretted switching sides? You never once realized you did not want to be a Kyoshi Warrior or to become a mother this way instead of the way you planned?"

"I used to, a long time ago. But I feel too guilty. I feel way too guilty about the stuff we did during the war and on Kyoshi Island I moved on. Those dreams aren't my dreams anymore."

"Guilty?" Azula rolls her eyes. "You're weak. So weak."

"I wish you felt guilty." Ty Lee furrows her brow.

"I have nothing to feel guilty about," scoffs Princess Azula.

"But what you - we've - done…" Ty Lee rubs her lips together.

"I can live with anything I've done," says Azula.

Ty Lee frowns and casts her gaze downward.

"That's the difference between us," she says in a pained whisper. "I can't."

Azula clenches her jaw and glares.

39. Decision

In the dead of the night, Azula stands in front of the smug New Ozai Society representative

She does not hesitate.

She has made her decision at last.

"I'll do it."