Dallas, Texas

"Sue Ellen?" noticing how antsy and distracted her daughter-in-law appeared to be, Miss Ellie knew she had to at least ask her whether she was ok; Sue Ellen didn't have to talk if she didn't want to, but she needed a little reminder that she wasn't all alone in the world. Looking up from her lunch, Sue Ellen saw a familiar look in her mother-in-law's eyes, love and genuine concern, "yes Miss Ellie?" knowing that she probably wasn't concerned about John Ross, he was a happy, healthy little boy who had everything and everyone there for him, she knew what her next words were going to be, "is everything all right?" Sighing, Sue Ellen remembered the way things had been over the past year and the past few weeks with Doctor Williams; she needed to say something, keeping things inside her never ended well. "Well yes and no", taking a sip of her iced tea as she paused, Sue Ellen then began to speak, "it's my mother. She called me earlier to discuss her plans for the future, plans she just decided to make a reality, without consulting me or thinking about my feelings or how things would realistically work for us", sighing again, she looked down at the table; it was always easier to explain her feelings when she didn't have to make eye contact. "I'm worried about the way things will be if she moves up here, to Dallas".

Taking another pause, she then continued, encouraged by Miss Ellie's kind expression, "I love my mother, don't get me wrong, but I like the separation we have now. After college graduation, JR bought me an apartment and I loved the independence of having my own place, my mother did not; she was nosy and bossy and couldn't accept that I was an individual who was allowed to make her own decisions. I'm worried that even though I'm a married adult woman and a mother myself now, she'll end up interfering in my life in ways that are more destructive than constructive. I feel like I've made a lot of personal progress and am becoming a more confident, happier woman, but that's not necessarily the case when my mother is around. I'm always on edge, waiting for her to say or do something that undermines me and even when she doesn't and she's perfectly polite and nice, I still can't relax. I don't mind her coming up for weekends and I love that she wants to spend time with John Ross, but I don't know if I can handle her just popping in to check up on me, without warning or reason; I like being an adult, I don't want to go back to feeling like a schoolgirl again". Hoping that Miss Ellie understood that she wasn't really trying to be nasty or take away her mother's privileges as a grandmother, she simply wanted to have her own space, and having her mother and sister in Dallas was a little too close for comfort, she was pleased when Miss Ellie gave her a sympathetic smile.

"Sue Ellen, you're a mother now, but you're still a young mother, you still have your son's whole life to share; your mother doesn't have the same privilege. I know it seem like she's too overbearing sometimes, but that's a sign that she loves you and cares what goes on in your life. If she didn't care then she wouldn't visit or call, or plan to be closer to her family; she may not show it in the best way sometimes, but she loves you and she loves John Ross and she wants to be closer to you two". Temporarily forgetting that they were speaking about Patricia, not her, Miss Ellie was confused by the look on Sue Ellen's face, however, as soon as it clicked in her mind that Patricia's motivations to be in Sue Ellen's life weren't really that similar to her own wishes to be in Gary's life, she scrambled to add a little more. "I understand what you're saying though; you want to be treated like the adult that you are, no matter how much she may not see you that way. It's hard for a parent to let go and it's hard for a parent to stay connected to their child if they don't make a real effort, so I understand where she's coming from too. Have you discussed this with her? She's more likely to take you seriously if you act like an adult and from our conversation right now, I think you're more than capable of expressing your feelings in an articulate manner". Looking at her expectantly, she wasn't surprised when Sue Ellen looked nervously down at the table, "we're flying down to Austin this weekend; that's actually part of the reason why I'm so nervous right now". Feeling sick to her stomach at the thought of confrontation, Sue Ellen sighed and was surprised when Miss Ellie responded with only one word, "we?". Looking at her mother-in-law, she blushed before speaking, "yes, I'm bringing JR with me for moral support… and because he wouldn't allow me to go by myself". It was a little embarrassing to admit that although she kept verbally repeating her wish to be treated like an adult, she also allowed her husband to dictate her actions, even if she secretly enjoyed his protectiveness. However, she was pleased that it was only Miss Ellie she had to explain herself to, she was a kind, understanding and for the most part, non-judgemental woman.

Smiling as Sue Ellen explained she and JR's plans, Miss Ellie kept her inner thoughts to herself; it pleased her that JR was acting so protectively toward his wife, without prompting from his father or other outside forces; he was finally growing up and becoming a man. "I think that's a nice gesture. From what you've described, you may be able to handle it yourself, but that doesn't mean you should have to", remembering how vicious Patricia could be, she was then extra glad that JR was accompanying his wife to Austin; Sue Ellen and her mother needed to talk, but the reality was that a mediator may be needed. If she knew JR though, he wouldn't hesitate to punish Patricia in whatever way he saw fit if she upset Sue Ellen again, and although she respected Patricia on an adult level, she wouldn't be upset to hear that someone had finally put her in her place; she did treat Sue Ellen particularly badly sometimes and it wasn't right. Knowing that Sue Ellen had JR with her to support her, even if she didn't necessarily need him to fight her battles for her, was a blessing and it pleased her to see that JR was taking the initiative to be a good husband, it was about time. "Thank you", keeping her response simple but still sentimental, Sue Ellen thanked her mother-in-law; Miss Ellie was a good listener and she seemed to truly have her best interests at heart, so conversations with her were usually just the reassurance she needed. She was trying to become stronger and more resilient, but it wasn't something that happened overnight, so she was glad to have understanding and supportive people in her life.

To be continued…