Chapter Eleven
November, 2011
Launceston, Tasmania
Jane retrieved her luggage from the baggage area and followed a moderate stream of people towards the exit of the Launceston Airport. Exiting through the automated doors her eyes searched until they fell on the cab rank. She walked over to the first free cab in the line and allowed the cabbie to place her luggage in the trunk. She shoved her carry-on bag onto the back seat and slid in beside it. "Launceston please."
"Where to in Launceston ma'am?" The Sudanese driver asked politely as he pulled into the lane that snaked around short term parking before departing the regional airport.
The exhaustion from her transpacific flight and subsequent connections left her mind feeling fuzzy, she only hoped that the information she had was enough. "The public hospital."
"The LGH Ma'am?" He asked seeking confirmation.
"Yeah," she agreed content that it sounded about right.
If it hadn't been for Kelly she wouldn't have even known to ask to be taken to Launceston as the airport was located in a rural area twenty minutes away from the city centre. If it hadn't have been for Kelly she wouldn't have even known where she was going, but thankfully the Olympian had toured Australia for softball friendlies in the past and had spent some time travelling the country.
Of course she wasn't entirely sure what she was going to do when she got there. It was then she remembered to switch her phone back on as a key part of her plan banked on Maura having attempted to contact her while she was busy travelling half way around the world. Because she sure knew she needed to speak to Maura before she stumbled blindly into a hospital with little more to go on than Gabby's first name and that she had been in an accident.
She was fortunate that Kelly had reminded her to have international roaming switched on so that she could indeed receive her text messages and missed calls. Once the phone had finally come back to life she saw that she had one voice message from Maura. She brought the phone to her ear and listened. "Jane, I know this isn't the best time. I just wanted to update you. Gabby came through surgery successfully but they have induced coma because of a head injury. I'm worried Jane… I wish you were here."
The message ended then and besides marvelling at how difficult it must have been for Maura not to launch into a spiel on the specifics of the head injury Jane knew she had made the right decision. The most impulsive decision of her life, aside from venturing into the basement Hoyt had surprised her in, but the right decision nonetheless.
She called Maura and as she listened to the phone ring her eyes fell on livestock grazing on land beside the highway. On the horizon buildings were beginning to appear as the farmland made way for the outer suburbs of the city built upon the mouth of the Tamar River. Maura's voicemail picked up and Jane sighed, she didn't bother leaving a message. She would have to handle things differently.
Launceston General Hospital
Maura had maintained an almost consistent vigil at Gabby's bedside once she had been moved from recovery to Ward 2. Her vitals were stable and the surgeon had been confident that they had repaired the damage caused by the tension pneomothorax and had treated a bleed on the brain. They had induced a coma to allow her brain and body time to recover and to monitor for any other potential bleeds they may have missed.
She had returned home twice to shower and change and to have something to eat, but she spent most of her time by Gabby's side holding her hand and updating her on what was going on in her absence. It was all she could do to maintain a level of self control over her emotions. Despite the fact Gabby had made it through the worst she was still very afraid for Gabby's well being.
Maura had been used to handling life's difficulties alone until Jane. Since then her life had been filled with such vibrancy that she now found it difficult to deal with what was happening alone and she was very much alone. Melissa had disappeared in an agitated state and had yet to return and as far as she knew Monica and Brad were still vacationing. Jane hadn't been available when she had called and there wasn't anybody else she could lean on. It was a sobering thought, a reminder that she had left her surrogate family in Boston and she was sure that at this point she would very much welcome the fussing of Angela, if it meant that she didn't have to feel so alone.
The regular rhythm of Gabby's heartbeat on the monitor provided some comfort but it didn't ease her anxiety. It could be several days before the doctors even considered bringing her out of the drug induced coma. They would be the longest days of her life, of that she had no doubt. Several tears escaped leaving hot streaks marking her cheeks. She leaned in and pressed a kiss against Gabby's forehead; she really needed to stretch her legs. "I'll be back soon, my love."
Maura left the ward and expertly navigated her way through the hospital and outside towards a nearby park. Ockerby Garden's backed onto the south side of the hospital premises and was easily accessible from the car park. Lush grass and vibrant trees of varying species provided a peaceful setting. Maura had taken to walking the bitumen sealed walking track inside the park when she needed to escape the intensity of her emotions.
The park wasn't large by any means, but there were several benches for those that wanted to sit. Maura sat down on one of the benches after taking her time to appreciate the majesty of the trees and the backdrop of the red sky as the sun slowly faded into the west.
Maura sat in quiet contemplation. Visiting hours would be over soon and while the ward staff had been quite understanding given her conscientious demeanour it was time to adhere to the rules. Maintaining her bedside vigil wasn't going to make a difference while the drugs kept Gabby sedated. She had to face her home eventually, regardless of how empty it was going to feel knowing that Gabby wasn't going to be stopping by to fill her home with life.
She surmised that she may be more afraid of where her thoughts would take her in her home alone, than where they took her in the confines of the hospital. While she spent most of her time alone with a comatose patient there were still the sounds of life happening around them. An involuntary shudder rolled through her body. She missed Jane. Jane would make it a lot easier to deal with the waiting process.
Maura pulled her phone from her bag and switched it back on. She noticed a missed call from Jane, but her best friend hadn't left a message. The good news was that the call had come through not too long ago so it was reasonable to expect that Jane may still be awake. She quickly returned the call and hoped her logic held up.
"Maura," Jane answered almost straight away.
"Oh Jane, I'm so glad I caught you." Maura said, feeling a great sense of relief to hear her best friend on the other end of the line.
"Yeah, me too." Jane said, "'Cause I gotta ask you something."
"Oh?"
"Yeah. So like, where are you right now?"
Maura's brow furrowed in confusion. She wondered where Jane was going with her line of questioning. "I am currently sitting on a bench in Ockerby Gardens."
"Is that anywhere near the hospital?" Jane queried.
"Beside it actually. What is this about Jane?"
"Well," Jane said, "That's good 'cause I just got out of a cab out front and could really use a little direction."
Maura's heart skipped a beat while her brain processed what she had heard, because it sounded very much like Jane was implying she was standing out front of the hospital. Regaining control of her suddenly shaky nerves she sought clarification. "You're standing out front of the Launceston General Hospital?"
"Yep."
August, 2005
Launceston, Tasmania
Gabby pulled up outside her house and put her car into park, however upon seeing that Melissa's Mitsubishi Lancer was parked on the other side of the road she left her engine running. She felt heat rising in her cheeks, brought on by the raw anger she hadn't had a chance to process. There was a lot she and Melissa needed to talk about, but she was too angry.
Regardless how heartbroken she felt it just wasn't the right time. There was more than enough grief to go around without the ugly confrontation she wanted to have. She breathed in deeply and turned the engine off. She sat for several minutes regaining what composure she could, knowing that a grieving Melissa was waiting inside. Her hands tensed into fists before relaxing.
Melissa appeared in the window of the sunroom, arms wrapped around her own body in a show of vulnerability and then their eyes met. Gabby sighed before reluctantly dragging herself out of the vehicle and locking it behind her. Glancing back towards the sunroom Melissa had already disappeared. She steeled herself as she walked slowly down the garden path to the front door of her home. She couldn't make it about her. Not right then.
The front door opened before she could put her key in the lock and Melissa immediately stepped in and wrapped her arms around her. Gabby instinctively returned the embrace and placed several kisses in Melissa's hair above her ear. She didn't have any words, already choked up by so many conflicting emotions and her own grief.
Eventually she pulled back and side stepped Melissa. She then headed straight for the master bedroom intent on changing out of her uniform and into something more comfortable. She stood in front of her dresser and watched her reflection as she slowly unbuttoned her shirt. Her slow and deliberate actions were more reminiscent of someone who had been through a rough physical encounter, but it was merely her heart that was slowly killing her.
Weary green eyes and tear stained cheeks stared back at her almost daring her to let go and embrace her more primal emotions, but she held back. She slipped her shirt off and folded it neatly before placing it on top of the dresser. She then stood there in her navy slacks and white tank top staring at the reflection of a broken woman. Her body bristled at the sound of approaching footsteps and her eyes followed the movement behind her in the mirror.
Melissa moved into position behind Gabby and placed a hand on her shoulder. She felt Gabby flinch under her fingertips and watched her eyes cloud over in the mirror. Swallowing thickly she said, "Gabby please don't shut down on me."
Gabby closed her eyes and allowed another wave of anger to pass through her body. Once it passed she opened her eyes again and reached up to place a hand on the hand gripping her shoulder for dear life. Half of her wanted to comfort her girlfriend and the other half of her was ready to tear her limb from limb.
"I'm here," Gabby offered simply.
Melissa pressed a soft kiss against the bare skin of Gabby's shoulder and slipped her hand down the small of her lover's back seeking out the warmth of her skin. She needed to connect with her girlfriend, needed to feel her inside her, but she could see the storm raging in the eyes staring back at her reflection. She wasn't sure if her advances would be wanted so she watched Gabby's response to her touch in the mirror and when she felt confident she had received permission to continue she reached down to the tank top and slowly started to pull it upwards. When Gabby manoeuvred her body to ease the removal of the garment it was all the green light she needed.
Gabby knew she would only hate herself when it was over and it would only make it harder to confront the truth but she couldn't resist the primal instincts pushing her to claim what was hers once again. She needed to feel Melissa beneath her; everything else be damned. She spun around once her tank was removed and helped pull Melissa's shirt over her head before latching onto the elastic of her pants and pulling her in close. She wrapped her free hand around the nape of Melissa's neck and pulled her aggressively closer to kiss her hungrily.
Melissa met the kiss with her own desperation. She pushed Gabby backwards into the dresser where her hands went to the policewoman's belt and unbuckled it before unbuttoning the pants, which Gabby eagerly stepped out off while pushing back and driving Melissa into the side of the bed.
Gabby shoved Melissa so that she fell down onto the mattress, she then proceeded to pull Melissa's sweats off and toss them aside. She attempted to savour the moment and appreciate the raw athletic beauty of her girlfriend, but she felt a wave of uncomfortable emotion pushing its way to the surface. She growled as she attempted to swallow her anger back down but some of it got the better of her as she ripped Melissa's underwear from her body.
Melissa's body thrummed with anticipation as she felt her lover crawl on top of her and slip a hand between her well toned thighs. She pulled Gabby down towards her and kissed her deeply. Her chest heaved under the intense need she felt for Gabby to bring her undone. "Please," she begged.
Gabby broke their searing kiss and looked into Melissa's eyes and in the moment they connected it became painfully clear to them both that she knew what she hadn't been told. Instead of having a sobering affect it only spurred their insatiable hunger for the pleasures of the flesh.
Gabby maintained eye contact as her hand expertly teased and probed slick folds. She felt Melissa buck beneath her, clearly desiring firmer contact. She acquiesced to the request, slipping two fingers inside and setting a steady pace.
Hot tears bit at Melissa's cheeks as she stared up into the hardened eyes of her girlfriend. Her body was being played like a piano and it felt amazing, but her heart ached. The closer she came to crashing over the edge the harder it was to look into those stormy green eyes. "Oh God," she moaned and turned her head away. She didn't want the pleasure to stop because she knew when it was over, it was over.
"Look at me," Gabby demanded slowing her ministrations knowing that she had brought her lover to the edge. "Look at me," she reiterated.
She felt like her heart might just explode, but she did as she was told nonetheless. Through her tears she locked eyes with Gabby once again and shuddered as the first wave of her orgasm began to roll through her. "Oh God, Gabby, please…"
Aware of the bitter tears that were stinging her own eyes Gabby leaned down and kissed Melissa softly one last time. She felt her girlfriend's inner walls tighten around her fingers and she ensured she gave all she had before withdrawing. Then without another word she climbed off the bed grabbed a towel and headed for the bathroom.
November, 2011
Launceston, Tasmania
Melissa had spent the previous forty eight hours pushing her body to the limit. She had spent a lot of time at the gym on the treadmill and the rowing machine, but it hadn't been enough. No matter how she tried to push herself to exhaustion her mind refused to give in beyond a five hour period of broken sleep somewhere in the middle of it all.
Her mind kept flashing back to what she felt like started it all. She blamed herself for Gabby's accident, even though she had nothing to do with it. In her mind their fate was sealed the moment she had stepped out with Rachael. Perhaps if she hadn't allowed her emotions to get the better of her then the entire course of their lives would have been different.
She was haunted by the day she realised Gabby knew of her affair and kept reliving that day over and over. She could almost taste Gabby's skin and feel her touch and she couldn't shake the look in her eyes when she had left the room. She'd broken Gabby that day, but it wasn't until she had followed Gabby to the bathroom and stood outside the door listening to her cry in the shower that she realised how badly she had. She had never seen or heard Gabby cry before then and only once since.
Her phone beeped to indicate a new message had been received. It was the fourth or fifth message from Monica that she hadn't responded to and she knew that it wouldn't be long before her best friend called and it only gutted her more. Monica's sister had died because she hadn't bothered to look before crossing the road. Monica of course had seen it differently, choosing instead to accept that it was Rachael's choice to come to the rescue and as such Melissa shouldn't blame herself. It didn't really assuage the guilt Melissa felt when she thought back to that time, which unfortunately was all she could do with everything going on.
As she expected the phone rang. She took a deep breath before answering. "Hey Mon, what's up?"
"Don't you what's up me, Missy." Monica's tone resided in the wheelhouse of a mother scalding her child. "What's going on with you?"
"Just been busy," Melissa offered, trying to keep her tone light.
"You're never too busy to respond when I text you. So please don't make me repeat myself." Monica was more than aware that her best friend walked a fine line when it came to her mental well being. The silence that followed sent a chill down her spine. "Melissa," she said firmly, "are you okay?"
Melissa closed her eyes and pushed down the tears that were ready to fall once more. Monica knew her so well, like the sister she never had. "I'm fine," she lied, not expecting to be believed.
"Bullshit," Monica scoffed. "Just tell me what's going on, please."
Her walls crumbled and she couldn't hold back the swell of emotion that threatened to wash her away. "Gabby was in an accident…"
"What? When? Is she okay?"
"I don't know," Melissa growled, "I couldn't stay there Mon." Hot tears bit at her cheeks. "It brought it all back. I just had to get out of there."
Monica knew that her sister's death was a wound that Melissa would never truly heal from and that it cut deep. She took a deep breath of her own at the stab of pain in her chest from the reminder of what she too had lost. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't want you to cut your holiday short until we knew one way or another and then I just…"
"Didn't wanna deal with it?"
"Yeah," Melissa admitted. "Maura would have found a way to contact me if it was bad, so I guess she came through it okay."
"What about you?" Monica queried, "How are you choosing not to deal with it?" She was already writing down the gist of the conversation and passing a note to Brad with the key phrase being the need to cut their vacation short. "Missy?"
"Gym, mostly."
"Have you slept?"
"A little."
She hated to have to ask the next question and she was loathe to put the idea into her friend's head, but deep down she knew the idea was already there. "Whiskey?"
"Not yet." Melissa answered honestly, "But I'm staring at a bottle I bought this morning."
"Listen to me Missy, okay? It's not worth it, you're stronger than this and just, God just call your sponsor okay? We'll be home in the morning and you won't have to deal with this alone."
"Okay," Melissa replied, not at all sure she was going to hold out; not at all sure she wanted to hold out. The temptation to drown her sorrows had only been growing stronger; it was surprising that she had lasted as long as she had given the circumstances.
"We love you Missy, we'll be home soon. Please just hang in there."
"Yeah," Melissa said absently, right before ending the call.
Launceston General Hospital
Jane stood on the footpath directly outside the front entrance to the Launceston General Hospital waiting patiently for Maura to return from the park. Her eyes watched the corner of the hospital where it met the car park like a hawk, waiting for the first glimpse of Maura she'd had in person for months.
It took a moment for her brain to catch up with what she was seeing when Maura did first appear, because the woman was dressed very casually in jeans and what must have been a designer tee shirt. Her hair was tied back in a loose ponytail and when their eyes locked, Jane broke out into a huge grin. She was so happy to see her best friend.
"Hey, there you are." Jane said as Maura approached. "Oh, hey, oomph…" the unexpected power of the immediate hug Maura had wrapped her in knocked the air out of her. "Happy to see you too."
Maura hadn't intended to hug Jane as quickly or tightly as she had, but her emotions had taken over. Having spent two days holding back so that she could remain strong meant it was an incredible release to have her dearest friend standing right there in front of her. She melted into Jane's arms when they wrapped protectively around her and as much as she tried she couldn't stop the tears she had been holding back from flowing freely. "Oh Jane," she sobbed.
"Hey," Jane said. She gently rubbed one of her hands up and down Maura's back. "I'm here now. Whatever happens we'll handle it together, okay?" She pressed several soft kisses into Maura's hair and reiterated, "I'm here."
Regaining her composure Maura stepped back and away from the warm embrace she had missed so very much and smiled weakly through her tears. "Thank you Jane."
Jane reached out and brushed Maura's tears away with her thumbs, "I told you Maura, anything for you."
Maura felt that familiar warmth bloom in her chest that Jane had been responsible for on several occasions in recent times and it felt a little disconcerting. Her eyes fell onto Jane's suitcase which was sitting beside them next to her carry-on bag, which gave her the perfect opportunity to avoid thinking about how she was feeling. "I'm sorry. Do you need to get checked in somewhere?"
"I was hoping the Chateau-De-Isles had an opening," Jane responded cheekily, before sobering a little and adding. "I didn't really plan that far ahead; I just knew I had to be here for you."
Maura smiled genuinely for the first time in days. "We can talk about your organisational skills at another time," she teased. "I'll go and get the car so that we can get you checked in."
"Hey," Jane started, "You don't have to take me yourself if you need to stay here with Gabby. I'll get a cab if you just want to give me your keys so I can let myself in and then I can come back here if you need me to."
"No, no. I'll help you get settled in. Visiting hours are almost over and Gabby is in an induced coma. I'll come back in the morning to get an update from her doctors."
"Only if you're sure."
"Trust me Jane, it is good for me to step away from the hospital right now."
"Okay then," Jane said as she grabbed her carry-on and hooked it over her shoulder. "Lead the way."
A/N: Hello again, I hope you enjoyed the latest chapter. I'm about to go away for a couple of weeks, so as I have stated previously it may still take time between updates. Although I am sure this chapter leaves some of you with great anticipation, I'll try to write more while I am away, but no promises. Thank you so much to all that read and those that review too, it's good to know that I'm still capable of entertaining some folks.
It's also probably the appropriate time to remind you that this is a slow burn and a bit of a soap opera, so don't get your hopes up just yet. That said we should still have some sweet moments between our ladies coming soon.