Chapter Fourteen
July, 2005
Launceston, Tasmania
A day at the football hadn't gone according to plan for Melissa, when her team was defeated by ten points in a low scoring encounter. Normally she would be sharing her misery with Gabby, as they usually went to all the Hawthorn games at Aurora Stadium together, but this time Gabby had to work and instead Rachael had accompanied her. Rachael was quite happily gloating as it was her team in the Adelaide Crows that had won on the day and Melissa was wishing she had never asked her friend along. "Yeah, yeah. Let's just see how it's looking at the end of the season."
Rachael chuckled and bounced the football they had brought for a kick after the final siren, deftly angling the ball so it rebounded to her in stride. "Yeah, we're headed for finals and your mob…"
"Oi!" Melissa exclaimed with a soft punch to her friend's shoulder, "Get back to me when the Crows have nine flags." It was a lame come back, but given Hawthorn hadn't won a premiership since the year the Crows had entered the competition in 1991 and the Crows had gone back to back in 1997/1998 it was all she had.
Rachael just rolled her eyes and ran ahead into Prince's Square, which was on their way back home. "Come on slow coach." She called back, holding the ball up indicating a desire to have another kick.
Melissa continued at her regular walking pace, partially because a small part of her hated going back to the park she had been assaulted in and because she wasn't sure how much more she could handle watching Rachael bound around athletically. They had been spending a lot more time together and it had felt different. She could have sworn that her friend had been almost flirtatious, which absolutely wasn't her usual behaviour, but then things had changed a lot since February when Rachael had figured out the truth about her orientation and relationship with Gabby.
Gabby had been unsettled since, which Melissa couldn't understand. Gabby had always been the one that wanted to be open about their relationship, but now that it was they had been bickering on and off to a greater extent than ever before. Jealousy was becoming an issue and it had been frustrating, but Melissa was starting to think that her girlfriend had picked up on some things she had yet to realise.
As soon as she stepped off the path onto the grass Melissa had to leap and extend her hands to grab the ball out of the air. She took several steps forward and stab kicked a perfect drop punt onto the chest of Rachael. "Now that is how you kick a short pass," she bragged.
Rachael shrugged, spinning the ball around in her hands. "I'm more of a tackler anyway, like to get up close and personal." She kicked the ball back with almost as perfect accuracy as she had received.
It was comments like that Melissa wondered about. Was she just misinterpreting innocent comments? "I dunno, I reckon you'd bite on the candy pretty easy."
Rachael quirked en eyebrow, "Bring it."
Melissa sized up her friend who stood approximately fifteen metres away and figured it would be easy enough to sell the eye candy with a hand feint and side step. Most people watched the ball and not the hips, which was the key to knowing exactly where your opponent was headed. She took a quick bounce of the ball and then sprinted towards Rachael, gracefully throwing her hand out to her right side, ball in hand and shifting her body left to slide past fully anticipating Rachael would move with her right hand.
She couldn't have been more wrong as it turned out. Rachael had watched the hips like a good tackler would and had speared right into her stomach, sending them both sprawling and tangled up in one another. She never had been one to do anything half arsed.
"How sure are you about that?" Rachael asked, inches from Melissa's face.
The cockiness in her attitude slipped away though as she realised that she was planted firmly on top of Melissa. She knew she should roll off to the side, but she couldn't. Instead she pushed up from one elbow to allow her friend to breathe, but she couldn't bring herself to move any further. Her eyes involuntarily dropped to Melissa's lips and she knew she couldn't hide that. There had been a lot she had been trying to hide all year, but at this moment in time she couldn't hide what she truly desired.
"Yeah, okay… you hit hard." Melissa had managed to reply. Her entire body buzzed with an anticipation she hadn't felt in recent times. She watched Rachael's eyes drop and she knew she was in big trouble. "Rache…" her voice died out as what she had intended to be a warning had come out sounding the exact opposite.
Rachael knew the right thing to do and she wanted to do the right thing so badly, but she was drawn into the eyes below her that shimmered with a mutual longing. Resting on her left elbow, she brought her right hand up to trace Melissa's jaw line with a tenderness that made her intentions clear. She wanted to ask, she wanted to verbalise her desire, but there were no words.
Then again, no words were needed.
November, 2011
Launceston, Tasmania
Between the vomiting, the phone call and fresh air on the way to her vehicle Melissa had sobered enough to safely navigate the short trip from her home to Gabby's. She had pulled up outside her ex-girlfriend's house and turned the engine off, but hadn't been able to bring herself to exit the car.
Melissa's palm repeatedly slammed angrily into her steering wheel. Tears stained her face and her mind raced. Memories rattled around her brain at a frenetic pace bouncing between moments with Rachael and Gabby.
While it had felt like an eternity, a mere couple of minutes later Melissa managed to take several deep breaths to regain her equilibrium and straighten her course. She stepped out of her car, closed the door behind her and walked down the garden path. Skipping the front door she followed the path around the back, using her phone to light the way.
Just outside the back door was an old cast iron bath tub that had been turned into the home for several tomato plants and a small garden gnome. Melissa picked up the gnome, brushed the soil away from the base and pulled tape and the spare key loose. Her phone burst to life, but Melissa ended the call without answering and let herself into the house. She made a beeline for Gabby's office, turning the lights on as she walked through the house.
"Well fuck," she muttered under her breath when she discovered that Gabby had upgraded her gun safe and it now required an electronic pass code.
After a quick fruitless search through Gabby's desk drawers she knew she had no choice but to guess. She knew Gabby wouldn't use her own birthday and she knew it wouldn't be hers either, because that would be too obvious. It wouldn't be Maura's birthday, that relationship was too new and if it was that, Melissa knew her plans were dead in the water because that was not a date she knew.
"Damnit Gabby," she growled angrily, slamming her fist against the wall next to the safe. She wouldn't have many opportunities to get the code wrong either.
After a couple of minutes staring at the massive safe she was struck with an idea. She carefully entered the digits 180658, Gabby's mother's birth date. The data pad lit up an angry red causing Melissa to curse under her breath, of course Gabby had been a daddy's girl before her parents had passed. She entered the digits representing his birthday and the safe unlocked. She grabbed the Colt .22 and closed the safe. The ammunition would be elsewhere as that was the law; she just hoped it was where she remembered.
In the master bedroom Melissa quickly found the key in the sock drawer and crossed the room to the wardrobe. She pulled down a smaller lockbox, carried it over to the bed and unlocked it with the key. She was relieved to find the magazine she needed. She loaded the Colt.
It had been six years since she had last felt this sure of her need to end her life, but this time there wasn't going to be anyone around to stop her. It was the way it was meant to be. All the volatile emotions she had felt building up to the moment had subsided and she felt calm. There was a sense of relief that came with being certain in her decision.
Melissa walked back through the house and was about to leave when she thought about Gabby and she didn't want to leave her without some sort of goodbye. She walked back into the office, placed the gun on the desk and grabbed a pen and paper but decided that would take too long. Instead she pulled out her phone and dialled Gabby's number and waited until she was greeted by voicemail. "Hey Gabby, it's me. Just wanted you to know that I want you to be happy and Maura does that for you. So be happy Gabby, don't you worry about me. I'm going to a much better place. I love you."
Having been so focused on the call Melissa hadn't realised she was no longer alone and nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw movement at the office doorway. She grabbed the Colt and whirled around. "What the fuck?"
Maura stood with a concerned look on her face. "Melissa," her eyes focused on the pistol, "Can we talk?"
"There isn't really anything to talk about, Maura." Melissa lowered the gun so that it wasn't pointing at her ex's new love; she had no interest in hurting anybody else.
It wasn't lost on Maura the calmness with which Melissa spoke. "Perhaps not, but you cannot think I would leave you alone at this time."
It was obvious that Monica had called Maura; that was the only explanation for how calmly she was handling the fact that she held a gun. A small part of Melissa's heart clenched because of the desperation her best friend must have been feeling to send Maura into the fray. That feeling created the first chink in the armour that was the contentment with her decision. "I'm sorry that Monica dragged you into this Maura, but my mind is made up and I just need you to let me go. Please."
Talking a person with a gun down from any decision wasn't really Maura's area of expertise, but letting Jane make an appearance at this stage she knew might just cause a heightened state of anxiety, which was the worst thing for them all. She could feel Jane's nervous energy beside her, where she stood out of sight from the study. They had shared a very brief conversation on the way over and it had been a firmness that Jane had never seen before that had forced the detective to concede control. Control that Maura felt would go out the window if either she or Melissa mentioned the word gun and as such she not only had to be mindful of finding the right words, she had to do so in a way that reduced the risk of Jane's protectiveness taking over.
After several moments to consider her words carefully Maura said, "I don't think Gabby would forgive me if I were to do that." She paused for effect, "I certainly wouldn't be able to forgive myself."
Melissa felt the second chink in her armour and mentally flinched. "I dunno why, this is a good outcome for you."
Maura's chest filled with an empathetic sadness at the realisation of how deep Melissa's scars were. Her face softened and she took a half step forward to test the situation. "No, Melissa. This would be the worst possible outcome. Losing you like this would damage Gabby irreparably." She knew this because she knew her own fears all too well and the damage that would be done to her if she lost Jane to a violent senseless death.
"Just stop," Melissa half demanded, half begged. "She's better off without me. Just get out of my way." She lifted the Colt a little for effect, "I'm done talking."
Maura instinctively flinched a little and cast a nervous glance sideways to see if Jane had noticed. She saw her friend stiffen ready for action and she tried to wave her off, because she had noticed one important thing the moment the weapon had been raised again. She closed her eyes and took a deep breathe before opening them again, knowing that the situation was about to turn frantic. "You don't want to hurt me Melissa," she took a more deliberate longer stride into the room. "And I won't let you hurt yourself."
The unwavering attitude exuding from Maura was the third and final chink that ate away the calmness and contentment Melissa had reached with her decision. Her arm suddenly felt heavy with the realisation of what was happening, and she knew that her window was fast eroding as even as she processed what was said Maura was stepping closer again. With the last of her will power she brought the gun to her chin and pulled the trigger.
The gun dropped to the floor as Maura caught the falling woman and dropped to her knees with her. She felt Jane's presence behind them and a comforting hand on her shoulder. She let out a deep breath and turned her head to the left sharing a harrowing look before turning back to the woman in her arms.
Melissa's eyes opened and a sad almost bitter laugh escaped her lips. "I couldn't even do that right," she muttered before passing out from the shock of it all.
Jane picked the Colt up, removed the magazine and disassembled the weapon, immensely grateful that the safety had been left on. Things may have turned out a lot differently if that hadn't been the case and silently she stewed over the fact Maura had put herself in harms way, but that would be a conversation for another time. She sat the disassembled pieces down on the desk and looked down at Maura. "What now?"
"We will take her back to my place so I can keep an eye on her until morning. Then I can check her into a facility best equipped to deal with her current state."
"Right." Jane said, absolutely hating the thought of taking an emotionally unstable woman back to Maura's home; however she wasn't in charge and while she didn't really understand it she would help the best she could. She knelt down and picked Melissa up, cradling her in her arms. "Let's go."
A little later that night
A couple of hours after having succeeded in saving Melissa from herself Maura stood arms crossed leaning against the door frame watching the emotionally fraught woman finally succumb to sleep in her spare bed. She had insisted Jane take her bed, as she had very little intention of sleeping herself, not until morning when she could make the necessary mental health admission to St Luke's Hospital. She wanted to be sure that Melissa slept through the night in the mean time. Content that Melissa would stay asleep for the time being she walked over to her room to check on Jane who had accepted her fate and slumped down on the bed and passed out almost as soon as they had returned.
A dim light from the bedside lamp allowed Maura to see that Jane hadn't even taken the time to remove her boots. She tried to leave it be, but in the end couldn't stop herself from gently removing the boots while trying not to disturb the slumbering detective who had to have been positively exhausted from the jetlag.
"She asleep?" Jane asked through a muffled yawn, having been woken by Maura's failed attempt to manage her obsessive compulsive inclinations.
Maura sat at the foot of the bed and nodded in the affirmative. "Yes, for the time being. I apologise for waking you."
"S'okay," she glanced at the clock and saw she had managed a solid hour before being disturbed. "An hour's better than some nights." She sat up and took a closer look at Maura, whose own weariness was showing. "Give me a couple more hours and then I'll keep an eye on her so you can get some shut eye."
"You don't have to do that."
"Nope, but I want to. I'm here to help make things easier for you Maur, whether dealing with Gabby's situation, this one or whatever else happens while I'm here." She placed a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder, "You don't have to carry it all alone. I'm here."
Maura offered a weary smile. She was infinitely grateful to have Jane right there with her. She had absorbed the strength she needed from her lanky detective friend to get through the drama of the evening. There was a familiar comfort that came with her presence and Maura relished it. "Thank you Jane."
With some incredibly awkward gymnastics, that weren't entirely required, Jane managed to extricate her legs from behind Maura so that she could spin around and be sitting side by side. She bumped shoulders before pulling her best friend into a side hug. "You're welcome."
Maura brought her head to rest against her friend's shoulder, almost melting into the strong arm that wrapped around her. It was a comfort she had missed more than she realised. "I'm so glad that you are here Jane, I have really missed you."
For Jane it felt like their first moment of normalcy since she had arrived. There was no emotional desperation in their embrace or their interactions, just a calm sensation of being right where they should be. She resisted a sudden brain rush that urged her to make a bold declaration of her feelings, instead settling for a soft kiss to honey blonde hair. "Me too Maura, me too."
A/N: Hello again folks. Its been about four weeks, which to be honest, I'm pretty impressed with myself given I've been a year without updating this previously. I know it's not as regular as I used to update back in the day, but I'm trying and this one I worked a bit on certain parts to make sure they felt right. I would like to thank the new readers and old ones alike who have taken the time to let me know how they are enjoying this story, it really helps urge me on. I appreciate you all so much. I'll continue to try and get a new chapter out as soon as possible.