Summary: A long time ago, Kurt Hummel was simply a kid who couldn't bear the death of his father. Decades later, he had become a feared and blood thirsty vampire, a remorseless killer, a monster. And yet, years later, he abstained from killing, eventually becoming an ally to the Slayer.
A chance encounter with a trickster demon makes Kurt remember this last turning point, and what exactly made him stop the spilling of blood.
Notes: I didn't exactly plan to abandon this story, but working life has this way of keeping me from writing. And suddenly, it's been months that I had written anything. So I figured, if I'm writing so little, I have to change the plans for this verse. There are a few stories I care about, and that I want to write. So I'm cutting out other stories, leaving them as references to the characters' past adventures.
The next story planned was actually "Truth Or Dare", a story set a few weeks after "All That Glitters", in which Kurt and Blaine end up trapped and having to pass the time, in that case by playing Truth or Dare - which ends up just being truth, seeing as they're trapped. I decided to skip that. I was mostly a set-up for three more stories: Hail Mary, the one you're about to read here; My Kingdom Come, which deals with Blaine's past demons for a change; and lastly, the one hopefully following this one, and possibly the heart piece of the verse, The Boy Who Vanished. I figured, Hail Mary can just be written without set-up, My Kingdom Come might never get written anyway, and The Boy Who Vanished can be saved by adding a sort of exposition scene. But In the end, Truth Or Dare couldn't pass the easiest requirement - show, don't tell. So I scrapped it, and wrote Hail Mary instead.
This story deals with Kurt's past. As mentioned before, he got into bad company, let immortality go to his head, and become a monster for a long time. One night made him change. This is the story of that night.
Cooper, the Vampire Slayer
Hail Mary
The demon's laughter was chilling, even though the whole situation had something absurd. There she was, seemingly just a young woman in a skimpy black dress, standing in Sunnydale's concert hall in the middle of a dozen golden spheres arranged like the numbers of a clock. It didn't look threatening, more like some sort of varieté show.
But Kurt could not appreciate the humor in it, and he was pretty sure that the Slayer beside him shared that sentiment. A trickster demon had attacked them, and of course, it had taken Blaine as a hostage. Tuesday in Sunnydale.
How exactly did they stumble upon a trickster demon in Sunnydale, anyway? Weren't they more of a thing of the north? And when he thought trickster, he thought more of something like Loki, less something like… this.
Maybe she'd been kicked out for being too tacky.
"You have found my lair, then. What a pity," the demon said, a wide grin almost splitting her face. "You're early. I thought I had thrown you off. I did give you such a solid trail to follow…"
"That's the beauty of working as a team," Cooper said. "Now where is my brother?"
"Oh, he's around," the demon said with a shrug. "I must say, you have impressed me. Enough for me to consider leaving your little town."
"You really think we're letting you leave?" Cooper asked.
The hall seemed to turn darker, and Kurt thought he had seen a hint of lightning in the air.
"Do not be mistaken, Slayer. While you're impressive, we both know that you stand no actual chance against me. You should be more interested in me leaving peacefully. And just imagine, I'll even throw in the hostage that you seem to be so fond of." The flash of anger on her face had evened out by the end of her little speech.
"You're saying you'll leave and let my brother go?" Cooper asked. "Why would you do that?"
Because she was afraid, probably. She was good at pretending, even Kurt would have sworn just from her words that she wasn't worried about going up against them. But her actions belied that certainty. It made sense. She knew that they had a chance to take her out. But that was it – a chance, not a guarantee. A fight could go either way. In this case, a negotiation would be the best for both sides – and for Blaine, wherever she had hidden him.
"My motives are my own," the demon said, although she eyed Kurt as if she had an idea what he was speculating about. "Now, of course for that to work, you will first have to solve a little test. I do have a reputation to keep. If you get it right, I will leave, and you will keep your hostage. If you get it wrong… well, for one your hostage is lost. And also, my offer is retracted."
"What kind of test?" Kurt asked.
"If you want the hostage, you will have to find it," the demon said, smiling. "I have put the boy into one of these spheres. Pick the right one, and you win. You have one guess."
"And if we won't play?" Cooper gritted through his teeth.
"I have other surprises in those spheres. If you open the wrong one, you'll have to deal with what comes out," the demon said with a shrug. "It's up to you, really. It's nothing to me."
Now that was an obvious lie. Still, Kurt turned his head to look at Cooper. "I don't trust her… but I think we should at least try this."
"How do we know you'll keep your word?" Cooper asked.
"I offer you a deal," the demon said testily.
"She has to follow up on a deal offered," Kurt said. "If she tried to renege on a deal, she would lose her powers."
"You dealt with their kind before?"
"My demon lord has," Kurt said.
"Oh, you must be one of Isabelle's then. How has she been?" the demon asked.
"I wouldn't know," Kurt said, glaring at her. He looked around, trying to get a feel for the situation. "What are these spheres?" he asked. "There's energy coming from them."
"Just a little dark essence," the demon said with a shrug. "Don't worry about them, they're harmless. Well, on the outside."
"What?"
"Oh, yes. Your hostage might be a bit more affected, being on the inside of it… you might want to hurry," the demon said. "So, do we have a deal?"
Cooper glanced at Kurt. "Dark essence?"
Kurt had closed his eyes, trying not to show how worried he felt. "Cooper, take the deal."
There were bound to be questions and explanations. But instead, Cooper nodded.
"Very well, I take it."
Nothing tangible changed, but Kurt felt the deal had been struck and was working.
"Now, what is dark essence?" Cooper asked.
"It's poison," Kurt explained, "worming its way into the mind. It doesn't put thoughts into your head, it just… changes your perspective. Poisons it. Turns everything dark, until the demons' promises suddenly sound pretty good. For certain people that are… susceptible, this can be fast."
A few months ago, he would have laughed at the idea of Blaine being influenced by dark essence. He was too bright, too optimistic. But the whole business with the fake unicorn had shown Kurt that there was more to it. There was a darkness underneath the smiles, and the last thing Blaine needed was for something to feed it…
"Then we have to get him out of there," Cooper said. He started walking up to the first spheres, Kurt following him. The sphere was golden, about five feet in diameter, and on first look it had seemed solid. Now, that they inspected it more closely, Kurt realized that it was more of a thick, slowly moving liquid. Through the gold, there were small flashes of darkness. Cooper reached out to touch it, but Kurt grabbed his wrist.
"Don't."
"Let him," the demon said with a grin. "Though yes, if you touch one, you pick it."
Cooper stepped back, glaring at the demon. "How the hell am I supposed to find him?"
"What should I care?" the demon asked.
Cooper turned to Kurt, almost desperate. "Can you pick something up?"
"I'll try," Kurt said. He closed his eyes, and inhaled. But all he could smell, was a heavy scent of metal, with a touch of ozone. He shook his head. "No scent."
"Noise?"
"The spheres mute sound," the demon said laughing. "What kind of test would that be, if you could just call out to him?"
"He can't hear us, then?" Cooper asked.
"I don't think so," Kurt said. "I might pick something up, but human ears aren't fine enough."
"Then what do we do?!" Cooper yelled.
Kurt wasn't sure. Why was he getting so careless? All he had thought of was getting Blaine out of here fast. Why hadn't he thought about a way to do it?
"Let's still examine them," he said. Mostly, he was trying to win time, hoping for an epiphany. He walked around the sphere, trying to take in any detail. Then, he passed on to the next sphere, looking for any difference between the two of them. As he kept walking, he realized that this was pointless. The spheres were exactly the same. There was nothing to distinguish them. How was he supposed to find Blaine?
"Tell me you're finding something," Cooper said.
Kurt shook his head, walking up to the fifth sphere.
And then, he heard it.
It was faint, a human would never have been able to pick it up. But there was a voice coming from this sphere. Kurt just managed to make out the words…
"…holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and in the hour of our death. Amen. Hail Mary, full of grace. Our lord be with you. Blessed are you among women, and blessed the fruit of your womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and in the hour of our death. Amen. Hail Mary…"
"This one," Kurt said, softly as if speaking too loud would interrupt the flow of prayer coming from within the sphere.
"How do you know?" Cooper asked.
"He's praying. Pick this one."
He locked eyes with the demon, as Cooper stepped forward, and touched the sphere. Her face was frozen, but her eyes were glaring.
As Cooper's hand touched the surface, the liquid splashed down, and disappeared. Blaine was sitting cross-legged on the floor, his hands folded, and his eyes closed, the words of the Hail Mary flowing from his mouth. When the liquid hit the floor, his eyes opened, immediately focusing on Cooper.
Before he could say something though, a shriek echoed through the hall. Kurt turned to the demon, not a beautiful woman anymore, but a barely humanoid shape, enveloped by flashes of gold and black smoke. The remaining spheres around them too, splashed to the ground, some form of smoke rising from them, as the shrieking reached a pitch and volume that felt like it would pierce his eardrums. And then, it stopped. In a flash, the demon and all traces of it were gone.
Kurt stared at where the demon had been, not quite sure if that was it. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his arm. He whirled around, shocked and unprepared. He hadn't heard someone approach.
Blaine was standing in front of them, a bit spooked at his reaction, but quickly regaining composure. He was speaking, but Kurt could barely hear anything. That shrieking must have been harder on him than he had thought.
Cooper shook his head, and gestured at him to follow. By the time they had stepped outside into the open, Kurt started to hear enough of them, to understand the words they were saying.
"Did she hurt you?" Cooper asked.
Blaine shook his head. "She just put me in there. For some sort of game? I don't know…"
"What did it feel like?" Kurt asked. Even his own voice sounded muted right now.
"Like… shadow," Blaine said. "As if something was oozing out of that sphere, a mist over my thoughts."
"You seem kind of too calm about all this," Cooper said frowning.
Blaine shrugged. "I thought it was attacking my mind. And you always told me, prayer keeps the demons away. I figured if I used prayer like a mantra, it might fend off the darkness."
"Looks like it worked…" Cooper said, a frown on his face. It seemed almost too good to be true.
"I feel fine," Blaine said. "But I'll have Tina check me for anything, if that makes you feel better."
"Sounds good," Cooper said.
"Thanks for getting me out of there," Blaine said, a grin on his face.
"Thank Kurt, he's the one who figured it out," Cooper said with a shrug.
"Thank yourself," Kurt replied. "If you hadn't been praying, I wouldn't have had a chance to find you."
The smile Blaine gave him somehow seemed softer. "Thank you," he said.
Kurt didn't want to think about that smile too much, so he turned to Cooper. "And why on earth would you teach him something so dumb?"
"The Hail Mary? Sounds like it was a pretty good idea to teach him that," Cooper said with a frown.
"Prayer keeps demons away? That's the dumbest thing you ever said. You know that's not true!" Kurt was a bit surprised about how angry it was. But Blaine got into enough trouble anyway, so why would Cooper try to teach him something this stupid?
Cooper was looking at him with a weird, bemused look. "True, what a silly thing to teach a kid," he said. "And what an awful thing to do, isn't it? A demon, keeping a kid locked up, and all hope he has is praying the Hail Mary, again and again and again, waiting for help to arrive…"
Cold fell over Kurt's heart. Oh. That was the reason he had gotten so upset. Immediately, a child's voice filled his mind. Hail Mary, full of grace…
"Are you okay?" Blaine asked. He took a step towards Kurt, holding out his hand. But Kurt couldn't stand the idea of being touched right now. Not by anyone, but especially not Blaine. Sweet, caring Blaine, who still had no idea about just what a monster he had befriended…
"I have to go," he said, and had turned away before Blaine reached him.
"What's going on?" Blaine asked, and even while walking away, Kurt noticed the hint of annoyance.
"I couldn't tell," Cooper said. "Guess I stirred up some memories."
At that, Kurt started running. Usually, he would stay a bit longer. But it wasn't necessary. Blaine was safe, and with his brother. Nothing would happen to him. But even though Cooper had no way of knowing it, he had hit bull's eye with his speculation. He had stirred up a memory. Well, it had already been stirred between Blaine being trapped, and that goddamn Hail Mary prayer…
Why was it always the Hail Mary? Even the boy who vanished had wasted his dying breaths on it. But that wasn't the thing Kurt was thinking of. No, his thoughts were wandering to another time, much later, and still… how much time had passed since then? Many years, or maybe even decades? Why was time so hard to keep track of for an immortal?
That child had been terrified, and still, kept praying, again and again. Hail Mary after Hail Mary, until they bled into each other…
It hadn't been Kurt's darkest point. He had done much worse. Just thinking about what he'd done to the boy who vanished… but that night, that child, it had changed things. It had been a turning point.
He could honestly say he'd become a better person after that night. But that didn't change that he had been the person who had done all that. What would Blaine say, if he really knew his darkest moments? What would any of them say?
He wondered what had become of that child. Strange, no matter how that child had changed his life, Kurt had never tried to find him…
It was pointless. He should just get home, forgetting about the Hail Mary, and forgetting about that night. But even as he walked home, he couldn't keep his thoughts away from that night.
It had been almost a quarter century ago…
Elliot had gone off to "find himself". It had to be one of the lamest excuses for a break up Kurt could think of. Now sure, break up might be the wrong expression for this. But they had been travelling together on and off for about twenty years now. He felt he deserved to be a bit miffed about Elliot ending their company this abruptly, and from the way it sounded, permanently.
Maybe his demon lord had given him an order. Who knew with them.
It didn't matter why Elliot had left. The consequence was, that Kurt stood once more before the question what on earth he was supposed to do. He didn't have a task. He didn't have a place to go. That was the problem with eternity. It tended to get so boring
Of course, he could have checked if Lady Isabelle had any tasks for him. But he started to think the less he saw of her the better. Her errands had only got him into trouble in the pass. And how long was he supposed to be a slave to that woman? Of course, she had created him the way he was now. She gave him immortality.
Lately, it had started to feel more like the curse Hunter had spoken about.
He shuddered, thinking about the other vampire. They had been quite the team, Hunter, Sebastian and him Things certainly hadn't turned boring when they had been together. But when he thought back, on all that blood, the killing… no, it had been the right choice to leave them. Even if it had come too late for the boy…
But Kurt had started to wonder if travelling alone was such a good idea for him. Left to his own devices, he had once more found his way back to Ohio, of all places. His old hometown. His father lay here buried, as did his mother, his stepmother, his stepbrother… everyone was here. Even his dear friend Mercedes was buried here. Everyone but his sister in law, Rachel. And the boy, of course. The boy who vanished.
If he hadn't taken Isabelle's deal, Kurt would be lying there with them by now.
What if…
Really, he should never return to his home town. There were too many memories here, most of which he would rather forget. And yet, here he was once more, roaming through the streets of Lima, wallowing in his own self-pity.
What a way to waste immortality.
He wasn't even quite sure where he was going. He didn't think he'd ever been in this area. The houses were definitely much nicer than his own neighborhood had been. Come to think of it, he was feeling a bit hunger. Maybe it was a good moment to gather some evidence for Hunter's theory, about how richer people had a special taste.
Randomly, he walked up to one of the houses. Not exactly a mansion, but whoever lived there must be quite well off. Of course, he couldn't just walk in. There was this pesky problem with the invitation he needed to enter a house. But maybe, he could lure someone out…?
Just as he was trying to figure out a way, the door flew open. Kurt looked up in surprise, at the woman standing in the door, glaring at him. She was middle-aged, clearly trying to look younger, with a tad too much make-up, and an expression to turn milk sour.
She seemed just as surprised to see him as he felt.
"You're not Susan!"
Weird, but true. "I'm not," he said.
"I can't believe that girl," the woman fumed. "That's the last time I hired her, you can tell her that."
"Er… what?" Kurt asked.
"Aren't you a friend of Susan's?" the woman asked. "And what are you standing here? Get in already!"
Well, Kurt still wasn't sure what on earth was going on here, but this definitely was an invitation. He put on his most charming smile, and followed her inside the house, as if he had any right to be here.
"The kid's upstairs, he's had dinner, and I want him asleep at nine," the woman said. "If the baby gets hungry, there's formula in the fridge, just warm it up, I've written down the details. We'll be back at midnight, you get your money when we're leaving. Anything else?"
"Um. No. But could you slow down a moment?" Kurt asked.
"Sorry, I'm late already. Susan can thank her lucky stars that you showed up for her. I'll see you later."
She was out of the door, before Kurt could even try to catch her eye.
So that was what he was going to do with his immortality? Play babysitter? At least, as a vampire, if the kids got too annoying, he could just eat them. That was an advantage, compared to human babysitters...
For now, he would settle for getting a feel about the house he was in, so he started to look around. It was indeed nice. From what he gathered from photos, they were a couple with a school-aged boy – a pretty kid, with full, dark brown hair – and apparently a quite recent baby. The father kept cigars and what looked to be a very old whisky in his study. Nothing special, definitely nothing that would make him consider staying here longer than necessary.
What an annoying night. But it wasn't over yet. Maybe he could use the kids as an excuse, trying to sneak into a neighbor's house and get dinner there. But for that, it might not be the worst thing to check out what he was working with. Besides, if Sebastian and Hunter had been with him, they probably would have already started arguing about who'd get the older child, and who'd have to take the baby. They had been weird guys.
It was easy to find the room. A child was singing from inside, and there was that weird gurgling sound babies made.
He opened the door and looked inside. The boy from the photos was sitting in an armchair. Kurt wasn't the best with ages, but he guessed the child had still to be in elementary school. The kid was holding the baby in his arms looking at it very seriously, and singing at it. He stopped, when he noticed the door opening, and looked up at Kurt out of bright blue eyes that seemed way too observant for such a young child.
"Who are you?" he asked.
"Aren't you rude?" Kurt asked. He really never had gotten along with kids, not even when he'd been one.
"You're not Susan," the boy said.
"That's what your mother said." Kurt rolled his eyes.
The child looked at him in suspicion. "I don't know you."
"Just stay in here, then we won't have any problem," Kurt said. This child was already annoying him.
The kid glared at him. Was there something about children noticing demons more easily?
The boy opened his mouth, clearly wanting to ask a question, but he was interrupted by the baby gurgling again, and raising its little fists, probably annoyed that the singing had stopped.
"Not now," the boy said to the baby, before looking back up at Kurt. "And you. Who are you? You don't look like a babysitter."
Well, what was it they said about curiosity and the cat?
"You'd love to know, wouldn't you?" Kurt asked. He went down on one knee, to be on eye level with the child – and then, he smirked widely, showing his fangs.
The color drained from the child's face, as he jumped to his feet, still cradling the baby.
"Do you know what I am?"
The child nodded.
"Then say it," Kurt said.
The child stared at him out of wide eyes.
"Say it, or I'll have to eat that baby," Kurt said, making sure his voice sounded perfectly sweet and pleasant.
The child tried to speak, but his voice had disappeared. Only on his third attempt, he managed to spit out the word. "Vampire."
"Very good," Kurt said, grinning. He figured he liked the child more when he was terrified. "Don't tell me your parents have actually read you horror stories."
"I've seen Dracula," the kid said. The first shock seemed to fade, and Kurt noticed the boy was quickly looking around the room, probably for a way to escape. His eyes fell to a door leading to the room next door, then took another look at Kurt – and ran.
Within seconds, Kurt stood in his way. For a moment, he considered saying something like "boo", but changed his mind.
The kid stumbled back, and the baby in his arms was starting to cry now. Great. Kurt hated wailing.
The boy turned around, trying to run out of the other door, but once again, Kurt stepped right before him.
"I'm faster, don't even try," Kurt said. "Besides, you will not run away from anything carrying that." He pointed at the baby that was now full on wailing. A grin appeared on Kurt's face. Maybe this would be entertaining. "Of course, if you left it here… maybe I'd be distracted long enough for you to run away…"
It was fascinating that the child could even get any paler. "You're not eating my brother!" he yelled.
Not that Kurt had actually considered that. Babies didn't have enough blood, and it just felt… weird, to even consider it. But the kid didn't have to know that. Besides, what was the harm in playing with your dinner?
"I'm a demon. Sometimes we eat children," Kurt said with a shrug. "Careful, or I might even eat you."
"Vampires are afraid of crosses!" the kid yelled, looking around now, probably for something to form a cross with.
"Holiness repels us, true," Kurt said, "but I doubt you'll be able to throw something together." Then, he suddenly had an idea. "Did you know, though… there's something you can do."
"What's that?" the child asked. He frowned, clearly not fully believing him. Why, that was a smart one.
"Prayer," Kurt said. "Do you know how to pray?"
The child nodded.
"Prayer may keep demons at bay. Only, if you really mean it, of course." He gave the kid his best cat grin. "I doubt you can do it right. But again, leave that thing here and maybe you have a chance."
The boy stared at him, looked down for a moment to glance at the crying baby in his arms… and then, he spoke.
"Hail Mary, full of grace," he said, his little voice bright as a bell and shaking like a leaf. Of course, it had no impact on Kurt whatsoever. But why not play a bit more? So, he flinched back, as if the words had hurt him.
"Our lord be with you. Blessed are you among women, and blessed the fruit of your womb, Jesus."
The kid paused, maybe not remembering how the prayer finished. As he stopped, Kurt stepped closer. The kid's eyes widened, and he sputtered more words.
"Hail Mary, full of grace! Our lord be with you! Blessed are you among women!" He stopped, scared, and again, Kurt stepped closer.
The child started praying again, and Kurt flinched and hissed, getting more and more amused by the game.
"Blessed are you among women, and blessed the fruit of your womb, Jesus…" And then, he seemed to remember the words. "Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and in the hour of our death. Amen!"
Kurt threw his head around, as if he was actually hurting, while the child started praying from the top. But apparently, Kurt had gotten too distracted, as suddenly the child started sprinting, throwing the door shut beside him as he stomped down the corridor.
Kurt growled. Fun as this was, he would not be beaten by a damn child. He was running, and within seconds he would get the kid… He saw the boy running down the corridor, looking back at him with eyes full of panic… and then, he turned right, throwing open a door on the side, and diving into the room.
Kurt heard the sound of a bolt, and then there was the child's voice again.
"Hail Mary, full of grace! Our lord be with you! Blessed are you among women, and blessed the fruit of your womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and in the hour of our death, Amen! Hail Mary, full of grace! Our lord be with you!"
While it went on, Kurt stepped back from the room. There was the slightest echo now to the child's voice. Maybe this was a bath room. As the child kept praying, Kurt went to the next door. There was apparently a guest room, but it had no connection to the bath room the child was hiding in. As Kurt walked back to check on the next room, he noticed the praying had stopped.
Well, what was the point of that? He threw himself against the door, growling. And again, the praying started. Hail Mary, full of grace. Hail Mary, full of grace. Again, and again, Hail Mary full of grace, only accompanied by the baby wailing.
After a while, the praying got slower, and there was a yawn. Kurt grabbed the door handle and rattled on it until the kid was praying again, faster now, almost stumbling over the words.
Eventually, Kurt sat down, leaning against the door. There was a soft scratching from the door, under the praying and under the baby's wailing. Kurt imagined that the child was sitting on the other side of the door, leaning against the wood as he was, with that baby in his arms, praying and praying…
The child must be exhausted by now. Hell, Kurt felt exhausted. But still, he kept sitting there quietly, making noise whenever the praying slowed down. Just how long would the child keep up with this?
He wasn't quite sure how long he had been sitting there. He knew that the baby had finally stopped crying – maybe it had worn itself out – but the boy was still praying. Hunter would have thought this was amusing. But Hunter had been laughing over the corpse of the boy who vanished. Now that he thought of it, he and Sebastian had just been awful. But of course, that had been the reason to stop travelling with them. Elliot really was far more sensible.
Not that there hadn't been blood baths travelling with Elliot. He hadn't reveled in the blood shed the way those other two had, but he certainly hadn't gone out of its way to preserve life. And why should he? They were vampires. What did they care for humans?
Hail Mary, full of grace. Our lord be with you. Blessed are you among women, and blessed the fruit of your womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and in the hour of our death, Amen.
He wondered if he had prayed as a child. It seemed so long ago… Surely, his mother had taught him a prayer like that? He had lost faith a long time ago, of course. It must have been around the time she had died. It was hard to believe in a benevolent god after it took away your loving mother. He had lost too many people…
His father had known of course, that he wasn't a believer. His father had known everything about him. Losing him had been too much. Anyone would have lost their mind over it. He had to try anything to bring him back. And what was a soul, especially for one who didn't believe in heaven anyway?
It still had been stupid. Now, decades later, he could view his choice back then with a certain detachment. He had sold his soul for his father's life, and what he had gotten from it was to just see him die a second time. He hadn't even been able to save his friend, Mercedes. And then, of course, that boy…
Hail Mary, full of grace. Our lord be with you. Blessed are you among women, and blessed the fruit of your womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and in the hour of our death, Amen.
His father hadn't approved, Kurt knew that. Strange, being a vampire was the first thing Burt Hummel wouldn't support. Somehow, his father had found out how to handle a vampire, had locked him up in the basement and thrown down animals, in those first two weeks until the initial blood rush had faded. And still, his father had loved him, had been proud of the way Kurt had tried back then not to succumb to the blood lust.
What would he say if he could see his son now?
And there it was, accompanied by steady strings of Hail Mary, the one question Kurt had stopped himself from asking for decades now.
Suddenly, it came all flooding into his mind. All the blood, the death, people who had died screaming without him even batting an eye. He could hardly fathom all the things he'd done, didn't even remember half of them. It had seemed so simple at first, to go after the ones responsible for his father's second death. And killing had been just so easy. What was there to stop a vampire, whose conscience only showed up once in a few years and disappeared as fast as it had come?
The feeling of guilt was crushing. He felt as if he had to choke, even though he hadn't needed to breathe in decades.
What had he become? What would his father say? His mother? Carol, and Finn, and Rachel? And him…?
The child's voice was still praying inside. Just a child, a regular human child. And yet, he sat there, praying until the end of his strength, to protect his baby brother. Such bravery, for family.
Suddenly, he couldn't see any humor in the situation. He felt sick.
With shaking legs, Kurt stood up and walked away. Behind him, he could still hear the child praying. Downstairs, he sat on the stairs, trying to make sense of the night's events. He had become a monster, and he only now seemed to realize, or at least to care. He should have cared when he had left Hunter and Sebastian, when the boy had died. But all he had thought of was to walk away from his companions. Elliot had been better as a friend, but not yet good enough. Could anything ever be good enough after the things he'd done? He should be going into the sun, really.
Or maybe, he could change. Was there a possibility for a vampire to… not be a monster? If he stopped killing… if he stopped drinking blood… Well, not completely. He'd have to survive. But animals could nourish him. He had experience with that.
But it would be hard. How was he supposed to deal with this? How could he have the strength?
Maybe it was impossible. Maybe it was beyond a vampire's strength. But if it wasn't… if there was any chance he could stop this path… Wasn't it worth the trouble?
Suddenly, he felt calm spreading through his mind. Yes. He would try it. If he couldn't do it… then he deserved to go into the sun. But if he could manage…
There were voices, and as Kurt looked up, the woman from earlier stumbled in, a man with dark hair following her. She looked at him almost in annoyance.
"Oh, yes, the babysitter," she said. She went through her purse, and then put a few notes into his hands. "Thank you so much. Goodnight then."
It was a clear dismissal, but Kurt was too busy with his own thoughts to honestly care about it.
The night air was a relief, welcoming him back into darkness. But it wouldn't be like that anymore. A night like this would never happen again.
And about a quarter of a century later…
Kurt had calmed down a bit by the time he reached his refuge. He didn't think about this night too often, even though it had been his turning point. But it had worked. He hadn't killed a human since then. He had travelled on his own, living in woods and sustaining himself on animals. Later, he had returned to cities, keeping to himself and away from other vampires. Slowly, he had started drinking human blood again – but never to the point of killing them. And with the rise of blood donations, that had become a viable alternative as well. Back then, he would have hardly believed it was possible. He had half expected to go into the sun within the year.
But here he was, still alive – more or less. Not killing anymore, even fighting on the side of the light, the Slayer. And Blaine…
And yet, the question returned. What would his father say, if he could see him now?
He wasn't sure about the answer. He could just hope that what he did was enough to make his father not ashamed of him. But maybe he didn't need the judgment of a person long gone. As long as Blaine looked at him like that, full of trust, maybe he could keep his past at bay. Kurt actually managed to smile. It had been an exhausting evening. But that was alright. He closed the door behind him, ready to rest.
"And what sort of time do you call that?"
Kurt froze as he recognized that voice. Slowly, he turned around. It couldn't be. Not him. Not tonight.
And yet, here he was.
Lounging on his couch, as if it was about ten times as expensive as it had been, was none other than Sebastian Smythe, grinning at him like a cat.
"Hello darling. Missed me?"