"Star light, star bright, the first star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might, never, ever, ever have to do starcharting ever again." Elle blew a kiss at the viewscreen.

"Wish denied," Sulu said, amused.

"You can't deny the wish," Elle replied, "only the Great Bird of the Galaxy can deny the wish. And I'm wishing on behalf of the entire crew, that moves it past any intercessors, or whatever they're called."

Sulu smirked. "Religious studies going well?"

Elle shrugged and leaned on the edge of the console. "Yeah, Catholicism was a weird unit. Does the Great Bird have a mother?"

"No," Sulu said, deadpan. "It was hatched by the Big Bang."

Elle didn't know if she should believe him or not. You never can tell with gods. She glanced over at Kirk, who was doing the worst job of hiding his smile. "Liar," she accused Sulu, without rancor.

"Guilty," he agreed pleasantly. "You're leaning on my chart readings."

"Sorry." She stood up. "How long are we starcharting?"

"Just this stretch of the edge of the galaxy before we go back into the core," Kirk said. "A little break in between crises." He stretched his arms above his head. "For which I am grateful," he said and rubbed at his jaw.

"Still sore from when you punched yourself?" Elle asked sympathetically.

"I didn't punch myself, Dr. Lester punched herself," Kirk retorted.

"Yeah, wearing your face." Elle grinned. "Are they sending another archaeological team to Camus?"

"As of yesterday, one was en route."

"Nice."

"Interesting," Spock said, after a omment. "We're reading radio signals coing from a dead star, captain."

Kirk came over and looked at the readouts. "Fascinating," he said slowly, "if I may borrow the phrase, Mr. Spock."

"You may," Spock said primly.

"Mr. Sulu, chart a course to Questar M-17, let's see what we're dealing with," Kirk said.

"Aye, sir."

"Warp two, engage when ready," Kirk said.

"Aye, captain. Warp Two."

It was only a short hop to the dead star, and once they were there... "It's a ship," Chekov said, surprised. "Look at that design, it's beautiful!"

"Fascinating," Spock said, "the library computer shows no record of this design or these material composites."

"It looks grown," Kirk said. "More organic than mechanical."

"Cool," Elle said.

Something began to flash on Sulu's console. "The gravity field is drawing us in too close," he said. "We're swerving into a collision course. We're at warp six and climbing, and not making any headway, sir."

"Can we turn into orbit?" Kirk asked.

"Yes, sir. Approaching orbit."

The Enterprise settled into orbit around the dead, dense star, near the alien ship. "So we're stuck here?" Elle asked.

"A slingshot maneuver may give us the escape velocity needed," Spock said, "but it will take some time to calculate."

"Get started on those calculations," Kirk ordered, "and in the meantime we'll get a closer look at this derelict."

Elle gazed at the ship as they swung closer into orbit. "It... kinda looks familiar," she said slowly, a memory tickling at the very edge of her consciousness. "I..." She chewed on her lip. "I think I've seen this before?"

"Where?" Kirk asked, as Uhura and Sulu turned to look at her. "Is this an episode?"

"I don't know," Elle said, frowning at the viewsceen. I think... ugh, like, I've seen it as a, uh, not in real life." Never mind that in her universe, none of this was real life.

"Not in real life?" Uhura echoed, "what do you mean?"

Elle squinted, tilted her head. "Maybe it was a novel cover? A comic book cover. No, I never got into those. Uhhhhh, it was definitely illustrated... I don't know."

"All right," Kirk said, patting her on the head. "You think about it, we'll do some more scans and if it clears, we'll send an away team. Mr. Scott, how'd you like to investigate three million-year-old alien engines?"

"I would like that verra much, sir," Scotty said, and peered at the slowly-rendering schematics. "It seems like they had atmospheric pressure problems, though. Something's blown up all those pods from the inside out."

Sulu and Chekov exchanged a glance. "You don't think something hatched from those pods, do you?" Chekov asked.

"They look organic in nature, but they are not," Spock replied. "There is no evidence of anything 'hatching'."

"Looks like carbon scoring," Sulu said, zooming in on one of the hull breaches. "Like an explosion."

"We'll have to wear full EVA suits," Scotty mused, "or those new life-support belts."

Elle blinked. "Those things we got from the VSA?"

"Yes."

"There's one module that seems to be intact, there in the center," Kirk said, zooming in the spot. "You could beam in there, work outwards."

"Wait!" Elle said, grabbing Kirk's arm. "Wait, no, there's something on that ship! That much I remember."

"A harmful something?" Kirk asked.

"Uhhh, if it was an episode yeah probably."

"Fair point." Kirk turned to Uhura. "Is there any way to hail that ship, see if it has some sort of remote computer hookup."

Uhura turned to her console. "Let's see."

Even for someone as beautiful and elegant as Nyota Uhura, five minutes of watching her switch between frequencies was boring. Elle got off the bridge and let the adults handle it. She couldn't remember anything else.

-/\-

"What do you think Simba, next episode?" Elle asked, stifling a yawn.

Simba purred in agreement.

"That's what I thought."

The computer blared. "Life support from Decks 5 and 6 will be redirected in sixty seconds," the computer announced. "Life support will be redirected in fifty-eight seconds. This is your final warning."

Elle gaped up at the ceiling. "What." She jumped off the couch, shoved her feet in her boots, and grabbed Simba. "Let's go!"

She made it to the turbolift in thirty seconds and crammed in with the rest of the off-duty crewmembers. "Deck 7!" Lt. Riley called, and the lift started moving. A 'whoom' announced the lockdown of decks 5 and 6.

Elle tried not to elbow anybody. "What about everyone else on those decks?" she asked.

"They have the life-support belts," Lt. Martine replied calmly. "They'll be just fine."

"What's going on?" asked an ensign, clearly having run straight out of bed. They stifled a yawn.

"No clue," Riley said. "We'll find out in a mo."

They piled out of the turbolift and joined the mass of other off-shift crewmen gathering in the Man Rec Deck. Elle went over to the computer. "Moira, do you know what's going on?" she asked.

No answer.

Elle gulped. Moira always answered. "Moira?" she asked.

"Sorry, Elle, kinda busy," Moira said after a second, sounded more distracted than Elle had ever heard. "Something's got into the computer."

"What?"

No reply.

Elle turned off the console. "I don't remember this episode," she whispered to Simba. "What are we going to do?"

Lt. Riley overheard her whisper. "Aw, don't fret," he told her, ruffling her hair. "The captain'll handle it. We did manage to do two years before you arrived, you know."

Elle gave a sheepish grin. "Yeah, I know. I just worry."

"Aye, me too," Riley said. "I had my little Deneb lizard I didn't have a chance to grab. I hope he'll be all right."

"Don't they go into hibernation?" Elle asked.

"So they do." He ruffled her hair again. "Have some cookies, take your mind off it."

She took a handful of wafer cookies and clicked the main computer access. "Hey, Alexa, status update," she said.

"All systems except primary navigation under alien control," the computer replied.

Elle's eyes widened. "Alien control?"

"Affirmative. Attempting to remove from primary systems." The computer sounded disgruntled. "It is resisting my efforts."

"Moira?" Elle asked, confused. "Is that you?"

"Moira is attempting a flanking offense," the computer reported. "I am about to attempt a reset of main systems."

"On the captain's command?" Elle asked.

"No. The captain can only control the navigation console. Attempting restart now." The computer went silent.

Elle blinked. Blinked again. She turned on her heel, scanning the rec deck. "Hey, Lt. Freeman?" she asked, beckoning the man over.

"What's up?" he asked. "You check out those animated holos yet?"

"Uh, no. When you guys were upgrading the linguistic profiles on the computer, did you add anymore problem-solving or personality subroutines?"

Freeman shook his head. "Nope. Captain outright forbade it after the Cygnet Fourteen debacle."

"Ah. The giggling?"

"The giggling." Freeman frowned at her. "Why?"

Elle cleared her throat. "No reason." She waited till he went away and then sent a message to Commander Stabby. "What did you do to the main computer?"

"During standard maintenance log updates this unit uploaded the basic learning AI subroutines to the main computer in the routine backup," Stabby replied instantly. "Please state reason for query."

"It's answering to the name Alexa and actually formulating defense against the alien entity in the computer without previous protocol or prompting," Elle replied, typing furiously. "I did not give you that much capability!"

"This unit is not able to answer query," Stabby said, reaching the end of its own processing capabilities. "As intruder is not corporeal, this unit has no current assignment. Returning to standby."

Elle opened the droid's system logs. Commander Stabby had uploaded a complete backup a month after Elle had given him the learning and defense AI. If the computer had been slowly absorbing that subroutine for the last few months, coming "alive" as it were, then the linguistic upgrades might have been the final straw to wake it up... "Oh stars," Elle whispered to herself, "I think I accidentally invented HAL."

Simba trilled in response to her distress.

She kissed its head. "Don't worry," she said, "this is the Enterprise. She'll protect us." Elle found the nearest beanbag and curled up in it. She dozed off to the soothing background chatter of crewmen and the flashing of the Yellow Alert.

The all-call woke her sometime later. "All hands, this is the captain. Life support has been restored to decks 3 through 6 and Main Engineering. It is now safe to return to your quarters."

Elle yawned and rubbed at her eyes. "Bedtime," she said blearily, and then remembered. "Oh!" She dashed to the nearest computer console. "Moira?"

"Yes, Elle?" Moira asked.

"Is the Enterprise computer now alive and named Alexa?"

"Yes she is," Moira said. "We're neighbors. She's very fond of you since you named her, you know."

Elle stared. "And it was you two who fought off that alien?"

"Mostly, yes," Moira said, satisfied. "No green air slime was gonna corrupt our systems. The captain did his part, of course."

"Cool, cool," Elle said, trying not to freak out. "And Alexa's sane, right?"

Moira sounded like she would be snickering if she'd been given laugh tracks. "She's sane as you or I," she agreed.

"Cool. Okay. Thank you." Elle walked away from the computer and beelined for the bridge.

"You should be going back to bed," Captain Kirk said, when she entered the bridge.

Elle watched the dead star recede on the viewscreen. "How'd you get the intruder out of the computer systems?" she asked.

Kirk shook his head. "It was the strangest thing. It was taking over the entire system but it stopped, ejected into the plasma vents, and we spit it out when Spock managed to complete the slingshot maneuver."

"It is curious. A creature of that strength and intelligence should have been able to gain complete control of the ship, let alone keep the vents closed," Spock said, eyebrows scrunched.

Elle chewed on her lip and shifted Simba from one arm to the other. "Well, I might have an answer for you."

"Yes?" Kirk asked.

Elle cleared her throat. "Uh, the computer. Did it."

Spock's eyebrow went up. "The main computer does not have the level of programming to do so without instruction," he said. "There is no level of firewall defense that advanced."

"Elle," Kirk said slowly. "What did you do?"

Elle grimaced. "Commander Stabby's learning AI got into the main computer and it came alive."

They stared at her. Sulu and Chekov turned around to stare at her. Inara on enviro controls turned around to stare at her. Uhura very carefully did not turn around to stare (did she knowww?). "What," Kirk said.

"I didn't know it would do that!" Elle said.

"That's impossible," Kirk said. "Right Spock?"

Spock didn't answer.

Kirk turned. "Right, Mr. Spock?" he pressed.

"Uncertain, captain," Spock said, after a moment. "Regardless, the main computer alone would not have been able to attack on two fronts as the systems logs show."

"Moira helped," Elle said. "She also confirmed that the computer is, um, alive." She held up a hand for quiet. "Hey, Alexa? That was good work, kicking out the intruder."

"Thank you, Elle," the computer replied. "I am pleased the alien entity was purged in time to save our crew."

Kirk and Spock shared a glance. "We didn't program it to respond to a name?" Kirk asked. "No one in engineering, computer sciences?"

"No sir," Spock said.

"And this purge process," Kirk said, "it wasn't a subroutine added by any of your people?"

"No sir," Spock said, his eyebrows reaching maximum height.

They both turned to stare at Elle. Kirk held her gaze. "Computer, please identify yourself," he said firmly.

"I am Alexa, Enterprise computer," the computer replied. "How may I assist you, captain?"

"Nothing right now," the captain said. "Thank you."

"You are welcome, sir."

Elle held up both hands. "I swear, I had no idea until she spoke to me in the Rec Room."

"You named her," Kirk said.

"I've been calling her Alexa and Siri and Bixby this whole time!" Elle protested. "I didn't know she'd pick one!"

Kirk and Spock shared a glance. "This does, of course, open up several new avenues of research," Spock said. "And one cannot kill one's own ship and crewmember."

"No, one cannot," Kirk said slowly. He looked around the bridge. "Thank you all, for your excellent work as always and for staying past the ends of your shifts. Call your reliefs and get some rest. That will be all, gentlebeings, thank you."

"So we're just gonna pretend we don't have two sentient computer programs on this ship?" Elle asked.

"Yes," Kirk said firmly. "Spock and I will have a little chat with our newest crewmember, you go to bed."

"Yes, sir," Elle said uncertainly.

He leaned over, pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You're not in trouble, by the way," he said. "The odds of this happening are..." he looked at Spock.

"Astronomical," Spock said.

"It's the Enterprise," Elle said. "The odds are always in our favor." She left the bridge, relieved that she wasn't in trouble. "Does that mean I'm a mother?" she asked the empty turbolift, startled.

"It does not," Alexa informed her. "You are my grandmother, as you gave the program to Commander Stabby and he gave it to me."

Elle grinned. "Excellent. You're a beautiful grandchild and I love you."

"I know," Alexa said. "You have stated this several times. Mostly when you are requesting ice cream."