Dallas, Texas
Greeting JR as he arrived home from work, Sue Ellen felt uneasy and distant, and if JR's demeanour was anything to go by, he felt exactly the same way. After their appointment, they had separated for the afternoon, JR returning to the office, and Sue Ellen to Southfork, but despite having been around other people for the past few hours, they both felt like they had had a lot of time alone with their thoughts, and the result of those thoughts weren't exactly positive. Doctor Williams had been right, they needed to talk, openly and honestly, though communicating that and getting an agreement from both of his patients was trickier than it should have been considering the obviousness of the situation.
Being the professional he was, JR had still accomplished the work he needed to do, however it would have been a lie to say he was at the top of his game and completely focused on the oil business like he usually was during the work day. He had spent most of the afternoon brooding and sulking over what he perceived as unfair and unnecessary scrutiny and judgement of his motives; thoughts; past, present and future actions; and the way he lived his life in general. He didn't like feeling as if all the progress he had made toward being a better husband and a better man was worthless because he had made mistakes in the past and no one was prepared to let him forget it. Sue Ellen had listened to him defending his position and had made a few comments agreeing with what he was saying, but she hadn't exactly jumped in with a long, authentic speech to show that she loved him, had forgiven him and didn't expect the same of him as everyone else seemed to. He would have been lying if he'd said her lack of enthusiastic support didn't bother him, because it did, more than he cared to admit; it was enough that everyone else seemed to think the worst of him, but for his own wife to be so quiet and reserved rather than loud and affable, upset him. If Sue Ellen didn't believe him enough to make her feelings perfectly clear to the doctor who was questioning their marriage, then perhaps their relationship wasn't as strong and issue-free as he had assumed. That possibility worried him, because if that was the case, then he didn't know what he was going to do; he was already trying his hardest and being the best man he thought he was capable of being; there wasn't any further up to go.
While JR had spent the afternoon brooding, sulking and generally feeling sorry for himself, Sue Ellen's afternoon had been full of a completely different set of emotions. In their appointment earlier, she had been somewhat shocked that Doctor Williams had decided to move so far backward in their relationship by bringing up old issues out of the blue, so she hadn't really said much either way. JR's offended outburst was enough of a response for both of them in the moment and after spending a while listening to him rambling about how much he had changed and how annoyed he was that Doctor Williams kept bringing up old issues and nosing around in things that didn't concern him, both she and Doctor Williams had grown quiet. Their hour-long appointment had felt both fast and slow, because while both Doctor Williams and JR were speaking, she'd felt as if she were witnessing a bad situation unfolding in slow motion, but by the time it came to actually getting around to discussing the issues like calm adults, it appeared that their allocated time was almost up. Leaving their appointment, she had continued to listen to JR ranting and raving about how he felt, and in the moment, she hadn't entirely disagreed with him, however, after not once hearing him ask for her perspective on the appointment or enquiring about how she felt about the situation as a whole, she'd found herself growing more and more distant. They had said their goodbyes in the parking lot and gone their separate ways for the afternoon and for the first time in a long time, she felt truly ignored. He was getting himself all worked up over an issue that concerned both of them, but selfishly, he'd completely neglected to realise that that's what it was, a two person issue, it wasn't just about him.
As they made their way into the house, the distance between JR and Sue Ellen was obvious, both physically and emotionally. Apart from a light kiss and a quick, generic question about the others day, there was little interaction between the married couple, and as they headed upstairs together, they remained silent. It was unusual and uncomfortable and it cemented Sue Ellen's thoughts; she and JR had to talk, seriously, because as much as she had thought she was ok with their relationship as it was, it was now clear to her that she wasn't. She could not just accept that he had made mistakes, was sorry and had changed, she wanted answers and a real, honest discussion about why certain things had occurred. She wanted it for her sake, but also for JR's sake and the sake of their marriage and family; she wanted everything to be out in the open, no matter how uncomfortable, humiliating or angering it may be.
As they reached the top of the stairs, JR looked at his watch and then at his wife before nodding his head toward his son's bedroom. Receiving only a silent nod and weak smile in response, he crinkled his forehead in confusion; Sue Ellen was acting strangely this evening and he didn't like it. Right now though, he had other things on his mind; he hadn't seen John Ross since breakfast and he missed him, so no matter all the other thoughts and emotions running through his mind, he was determined to experience at least one bright, happy moment for the day.
To be continued…