This is for furture purposes, I just want to make some relationships clearer for this story.
I feel the whole Finn x Rose thing is a bit rushed honestly and I dont think he would be so quick to give up on Rey. This IS A REYLO STORY, but I feel the need to have Finn still try for Rey. Finn and Rose are just close friends in this, yet Rose obviously wants more but Finn wont go that far, with her at least. I plan to have some intense drama soon involving Finn, Rey, and Kylo.
So keep this in mind for future preferences. :)
Kylo sat in his chair that rested close to his desk in his quarters. It was mostly used for going over his data pads and holograms on new and suggested project for the First Order.
Three days had passed since he had that nightmare. It still haunted his mind, at night he there was some indication towards that dream. It was horrifying to relive it. First it was his father and now the dream of him killing the only person that cared for him, what was becoming of him?
There were so many questions that went through his head as he stared at the hologram in front of him. The hologram was an overview of the resistances current base, the bunkers and the ships that had been seen there.
A large data pad was next to him, the numbers changed frequently from new information being added. Fresh tie-fighters were being built and stormtroopers were graduating their acedemys and being sent out. It also displayed any damages.
He sighed and leaned forward with one hand on his cheek. The poor man was desperate to see her, yet he feared the worst if contact came between them he would harm her. Sometimes dreams end up becoming visions and people do what they regret.
A hand touched his shoulder ever so slighty, yet he felt it as if someone slapped his back. Kylo jolted up to his feet, the chair shooting backwards from the force. He spun to face the intruder. Realization hit him when he saw the figure and felt the force connection finally, he must've zoned out from the force, otherwise he would have felt their connection.
Rey stood before him slightly startled from his reaction to her. So many emotions were being tossed back and forth through their bond, some of which where making things worse every second.
"What are you doing here?" Kylo asked hesitantly before taking a step away from her. He wanted to keep his distant, even though he can't hurt her this way.
Rey gave him a confused look, she winced as a sharp pain shot through his shoulder. Kylo noticed and scanned her visible bandages."I am worried about you Ben-" She bit her lip as she paused to think her words through. Her eyes looked for his but he seemed to be avoiding them, his eyes looking at any other part of her, mainly her bandaged areas."Now you are the one trying to block me out." It came out as a whisper barely audible for him.
He stopped thinking and everyhting went back to that dream, it still was haunting him and now that she brought up his reasoning for blocking her out was hurting him. Kylo looked down, hiding his facial features from her. He only could transfer his emotions through the force, talking about it would make it worse.
"Ben please, I can feel it all." Anger, hatred, sadness, loss, and grief. They mixed together in a haze but it was easy for Rey to pick each and every one of them out of the pit."What's going on in your head? I want to help you."
"You need to get rest." He responded almost immediately. Rey stepped forward to grab his forearm, she felt him tense up and he started to move away, but her touch made him stay in his place.
It is strange, how a randomly girl that unfortunately got sucked into this whole mess from meeting a small droid, how she could immediately calm him. The second he saw her in the forest when they attacked Maz's castle, he felt a connection between them. Yet the former Supreme Leader thought it to be from knowing she knew the map to Luke. Now he knew why and it most definitely wasn't because of Snoke.
He used his free arm to grab her forearm to get free of her hold, without hurting her."Rey." His voice was deeper than normal, more demanding.
"Ben, I can feel all of your emotions. Everyday I feel you pushing them away through the force, it can't go unnoticed." She stepped forward while he looked for a way to slip past her but he realized they were in a corner of his quarters."I want to help."
She always has wanted to help him, do nothing but that. Yet he still refuses because of the First Order? No. It's because he fears any more pain that could come."I can't." He mumbled, looking away. Rey closed the space between them and embarced him in a hug. She did what she could with her wounded arm, her head rested on his chest.
He couldn't move, his body wouldn't allow this moment to slip. After all this is what he wanted to be close, but after what he saw in that nightmare, god knows what could happen now. It also isn't as easy as they may think.
If he abandons the First Order they will blow up the resistance base and search for him, calling him a traitor. It would only put Rey and his mother's lives at stake.
Rey felt the sudden rise of Kylo's heart beat in his chest, her own act of initiating the hug made herself get chills from coming into contact with him."Ben?" Rey looked up to see his sad, broken, and hurt eyes looking down at her. Oh the pain he has endured, it was hard to think of the last time he was treated with such kindness."Its okay, no need to be scared." She added.
He couldn't help himself at this point. Her body heat warmed him through his clothing and warmed his emotions, he longed for this and once wasn't going to hurt anything was it? Kylo wrapped his arms around her, his left going under her right to prevent himself from hurting her shoulder. His head nestled into the crook of her neck.
Her scent was sweet and comforting, his eyes closed to take in the moment. Meanwhile Rey was surprised, even though she hugged first, she never thought Kylo would go through with it."You can tell me anything." She whispered into his chest."I am here to help."
The sensation started to come back to him as the light started to grab at him, he felt both sides pulling him. The force energy danced around the two as they held each other. Rey felt the dark pulling and calling to her, but she seemed to have more control of it to keep it stable so that the light always beat it. She could feel the pain inside him, the two sides tearing him apart.
His dark energy sparked and fought back with a mighty push, the light was thrown back and Kylo tensed up as he felt the conflict inside him. He let out a small hum that turned into a gentle growl. Rey looked up to meet his eyes, panic swept over her as she saw his darkened eyes.
"Ben?"
He let out a shakey breath and shook his head."I had a nightmare." It came out as a whisper. Thinking of the dream that had been tormenting him only fueled the fire of the darkside that lived within him.
The darkside is your home, turning your back on it will bring you pain.
Kylo snapped back and pushed himself deeper into the corner, he looked around frantically searching for the source of the voice. It was in his head, the same one that had spoken to him in his dream. It was hoarse and spoken with an eerie tone.
As long as she lives...the longer your destiny is delayed.
Kylo gritted his teeth and growled, his lips quivered as he met Rey's panicked face. Her warm eyes meeting his to search for his fear and anger."Are you okay?" Her voice became hazy and so did her figure, their force bond slowly disintegrated and she was gone, leaving him breathing heavily.
Something was calling to him, some being wanted him and wanted her and Kylo has an idea on what creature would continue to haunt him and want the girl. Someone in which he feared.
He looked around once more to see the door to his quarters buzzing. It took him a few seconds to force himself to move to see who needed him. General Barok was waiting patiently, his hands behind his back in a peaceful manner, awating an answer.
Kylo granted him access and opened the door,"General?"
The now commander of the First Order gave his Supreme Leader a look, from seeing his condition. Kylo took into consideration that he knew he looked terrible, so he turned and walked to his desk gesturing for him to enter.
"Supreme Leader, the Knights of Ren have just arrived and are waiting for your presence, just as you had ordered." Barok shifted awkwardly.
Kylo paced over towards his helmet and looked it over before picking it up."Tell them I will be right out." His voice was shakey and his breathing slowed down a bit.
XX
Rey stumbled forward as the large figure disappeared infront of her, she caught herself on the door handle to her closest with her good arm.
Tears threatened to fall as the pain Kylo had been feeling surged through her body, the torment was too much for her to bare. She rushed her hand up to her mouth to suppress a sob. How could he deal with it, like it was nothing. The only reaction he gives is a frown and quivering lips, either someone who is stronger emotional or too scared to show the pain that they were going through.
She searched through the force to find him again but this time there was nothing. Both force users knew the solution, yet it was so far above them. It would cause chaos between the two sides, only more harm would come to both, something they couldn't risk.
"Rey?" A soft whisper came from behind, it was all too familiar. She looked over her shoulder, she winced in pain as the skin on her burned shoulder twisted. Finn stood in the doorway to her quarters, his eyes trying to find hers."Are-"
"I am fine Finn," Swiftly, she dabbed at her eyes while blinking rapidly to hide evidence."What do you want?"
This was actually the second time he had spoken to her since the accident, knowing that she didn't hate him, he had no reason to stay away. Yet he still felt awful about it.
The former stormtrooper took a step into the room, his eyes concentrate on his friend. Rey turned slightly to see him better."Stop, you can't do it yet." She said as she picked up him trying to read her mind. It wasn't easy to do it, Rey didn't even know how she did it to Kylo.
He frowned but still kept his eyes on her."You are a terrible liar."
Rey's brows furrowed as she faced him fully."It is nothing you have to be concerned about. Shouldn't you be with Leia right now, she is supposed to help you with the force."
Finn shook his head and came closer to her."She is scheduling and planning an emergency plan to leave this base if we have incoming First Order ships, I am suprised we haven't been attacked again." Her glare made him look at all the objects in her room, specifically the lightsaber sitting on the bed."But I came to see if you would help me." He bit his bottom lip."But you seem a bit distressed."
"I am fine." She turned her back to him. No, she wasn't fine, in fact all she wanted right now was to help Kylo.
"There's also something else, you are hiding it from me, I can barely pick up on it but it's there." Finn didn't think before he said that.
Rey's heart rate sped up a bit, she wished he wasn't force sensitive at times, this was an example of it. She drew the saber hilt to her with her palm out."It doesn't involve you." If he knew he would most certainly stir up an arguement on it.
She tried to leave but Finn stepped back to block the doorway. Her eyes met his with, she stared daggers at him." What are you doing?"
Finn shook his head." Please I just want to help, I can tell you aren't okay. Pushing us away isn't helping anything."
Rey's face grew red with anger. How hard is it for someone to go away when they aren't needed or when they get pushed away?"Finn seriously, stop. I am not pushing you away, its between me and Leia, now move." She used her left arm and pushed her staff into his chest to make him move. He didn't budge, the man only looked at her with pain.
"Fine." He mumbled, feeling hurt that she wouldn't allow him to help. The feeling of being rejected, especially by his best friend, hurts. Finn moved aside for her to pass. He watched as Rey stormed out of the room and down the hall, not even looking back at him as she left. He will just have to try again later.