Dallas, Texas

"…it's a simple question Sue Ellen. Do you trust your husband?" mentally kicking herself for pausing for a second too long before answering the first time, Sue Ellen listened as Doctor Williams repeated his question to her. "Of course I trust JR; it's that woman I don't trust. I don't think it's a secret or a surprise that she's a sore spot for me and that I'm not happy she's still in his life in some form", directing the first part of her answer toward Doctor Williams, she then turned toward JR as she continued speaking. "I know it's not your fault and I truly do trust you and believe you when you say you have no interest in her and you'd gladly let her go from Ewing Oil if you could, but you know how I am and you must know how she is. I can see it, she still wants you and she's biding her time until she sees an opening to make a move and have you again. I've been hurt by infidelity before and while I trust that you have the best intentions and wouldn't deliberately hurt me or put yourself in a situation where she could get everything she wants, I don't trust that she wouldn't manipulate a situation or simply offer you something in a way that's hard for a man to refuse. I don't like her because of her past with you, but her reasons for disliking me are much more complicated and clouded and I don't doubt that somewhere in her mind she would find great pleasure in being with you again just because it would hurt me". Being completely honest with JR as she spoke, she was relieved when he didn't snap at her or react badly to her assessment of the situation. She needed opportunities like their sessions with Doctor Williams offered and she was always relieved when taking those opportunities wasn't met with an immediate negative response.

"Good, good. Your honesty is always appreciated. JR, do you have anything to say in response to Sue Ellen's concerns?" turning his head as his name was mentioned, JR's relatively good mood deflated. There were days where he truly saw the benefit of his and Sue Ellen's sessions with Doctor Williams, but there were also days where he wondered what went through the man's head sometimes and why on earth he was paying him so much money for his supposed help. "No, I don't", responding to Doctor Williams in a sharp tone, he then turned toward his wife and continued to speak, this time in a milder but still serious tone, "darlin', we've had this discussion before. I don't trust her either and I'm doing everything I can to avoid a potentially risky situation, but my hands are tied. Daddy likes Julie and until I become president and can make her redundant, or she does something that breaches professional standards, there's not much I can do. Unless of course you want me to do deal with her in the way I would other potential problems?" Annoyed by the repetition in their discussion, he felt himself responding in a way that was possibly too harsh for his wife's intentions, but probably just harsh enough to signify to the doctor that he was nearing his tolerance limit in their conversation. Of course he understood Sue Ellen's fear of future infidelity and Julie's possible intentions, but there wasn't much he could do about it other than reassure her that he was doing what he could and he wasn't the same man he had been in the past. They had been through her insecurities and his past mistakes a million times before and while he was empathetic to her emotions because he realised he had indeed hurt her very deeply, they had also previously discussed forgiveness and moving on from the past. If she trusted him like she said she did and she truly only distrusted Julie and her intentions, then there was little he could actually do or say at present and he saw little point to their conversation.

Gasping as JR spoke, Sue Ellen didn't quite know how she was supposed to react to his words and attitude. He clearly had no desire to have a conversation they had had before, but instead of making a general statement to both her and Doctor Williams or asking to end the conversation where they were, he'd spoken in a harsh manner that had hurt her feelings, whether he had intended to or not. "Ahem, perhaps we should pause this conversation for a moment and all take a breather", hearing Doctor Williams clearing his throat, she stayed silent for a moment, but after a few seconds of silence, she began to speak. "No, it's ok; this isn't just about me, this affects JR too and he's just as entitled to make his opinion clear as I am", responding to Doctor Williams first, she turned toward JR, "I don't want you to hurt her, as much as I do want to slap her sometimes. I purposely don't wish to know the details of your business dealings so I don't know exactly what you had in mind professionally, but I've experienced enough of your personal backlash in the past to know how painful and scary you can be when you're angry. I don't hate her so deeply that I would want her to end up hurt, I just want her out of our lives and it bothers me when I feel like that's never going to happen. She can have any man in the world for all I care, she just can't have you and I'd really prefer if she didn't think she could. With that being said though, I understand your point and I never intended to make you feel as though you were a failure or you had to explain your position again. I was just answering the question posed to me and I suppose I took it a bit too far. These sessions are supposed to be for us to open up to each other and I know we do that in our everyday lives now anyway so it's not so necessary to do so here, but I still like to get a third-party perspective and opinion to assist me in clearing my head. Much of what I say in these sessions is me just trying to make sense of my feelings and while I love that you pay close attention to my words and thoughts, a lot of the time all you need to worry about is what I'm telling you. I trust you and I love you and I'm afraid of losing you. Even though the risk of that happening is minimal now, I don't enjoy thinking about it, because I've been hurt in the past and I don't want to be hurt again".

Listening to his patients as they spoke, Doctor Williams stayed silent. He would interject if required, but it was clear from JR's earlier response that he wasn't interested in his opinion, and from the way he and Sue Ellen were conversing at the moment, it appeared that they were communicating with each other just fine, and if anything, his poking and directing was more antagonistic than helpful.

Sitting silently, JR closed his eyes, placed his fingers on his forehead and contemplated his wife's words for a long while. Opening his eyes after a few moments, he then looked straight at her and spoke in a quiet, somewhat confused voice, "ok. Just one thing though; explain to me why it feels like we're arguing? You trust me, you love me, you're afraid of losing me even though you know it's irrational. Can we just accept things as they are and not allow Julie to ruin the good run we're in in our relationship? I'll respect your wishes, I won't forcibly move her out of her role, but you have to trust me to be around her professionally without worrying about it. I love you too and I don't want to spend our free time, or the time where you come to visit me when I'm at work, arguing. Julie is nothing to me; let the thought of her go and allow me to deal with her. The minute she steps over the professional line, she's out, but before that happens, if that happens, there's nothing we can do and no reason for us to argue about it. I come home to you and John Ross every night, I haven't been out-of-town on business in months and the thought of having sex with Julie now is not the least bit appealing; I'm a different man now, I just wish you'd remember that sometimes. I'm sorry about the pain I caused you in the past and I don't want to minimise how much it hurt you, but if you trust me and you've forgiven me, then can we please move on? I am so damn sick of having this conversation. I want to live our lives, without feeling wrong or guilty when I have no reason to, and I want you to be happy". Feeling his volume and tone of voice changing as he spoke, he could tell from the way her facial expression changed that his message was coming across loud and clear, and when she reached out to touch his hand, he knew she understood him. Sometimes he needed to speak harshly to snap her out of her thought cycle and while it wasn't pleasant for her, it certainly worked.

To be continued…