Dallas, Texas

"Granddaddy?" watching as her grandmother carried her baby cousin upstairs for his bath, Lucy Ewing approached her grandfather and waited for him to acknowledge her. She loved her grandparents and although it wasn't pleasant to admit, she had more positive memories with them than she did with her parents, however, from what she saw of her grandfather with John Ross, she feared he might miss out on some of what she had, and she didn't really understand why that was. John Ross had his own parents, that was true, but that didn't mean he didn't also have grandparents, an uncle, aunt, and a cousin and it didn't mean his extended family weren't a part of his life. She wasn't an expert in childrearing and she definitely wasn't kept in the loop when it came to adult conversations, so there could be some perfectly reasonable explanation for her grandfather's actions, or lack of actions, but at present, she just simply did not understand why he was so hands-off when it came to John Ross. She had spent years listening to him drone on and on about how great it would be when the Ewing family finally gained a grandson, and she continued to hear him compliment John Ross on how smart, well-behaved, and handsome he was, but she never really saw it go further than that and that confused her. Where her grandmother and uncle Bobby would get down on the floor with John Ross and play with him, her grandfather preferred to watch and comment, and when it came to tending to his needs, he never seemed to volunteer. It made some sense to her that he didn't really participate in the actual childcare of his grandson, she didn't really remember him doing that with her when she was younger, but she did have fond memories of being out on the ranch and just generally spending time with him more than she saw him doing with John Ross now. It didn't make sense, her grandfather had wanted John Ross for years, but now that he had him, he didn't spend very much quality time with him, and knowing how it felt to be ignored, she wanted to change the way he treated her baby cousin before John Ross truly began to remember and respond back to him.

"Lucy?" looking up from his newspaper at his granddaughter, Jock Ewing immediately knew he wasn't entering an easy conversation, her facial expression said it all and that worried him. "Do you remember when I was a little girl?" hearing her words, it took him a moment to comprehend what she was actually saying. Did he remember? Of course he remembered, he had been there throughout her childhood, not like her no-good father and well-meaning, but ultimately inadequate mother. "Yes, I do, and you're still a little girl…" wondering where she was going with her question, he responded and waited for her to elaborate. "Good, and I meant a little, little girl, say from when I was about John Ross' age all the way up until I started elementary school, you know, when I was younger and I needed more attention". Letting out a small snort at the inference that somehow elementary school had made his dramatic, emotional granddaughter any less needy when it came to attention, he stifled his emotions fairly quickly as he noted her serious facial expression remained unchanged. "Mm, I remember. Why do you ask?" she clearly had a point, but he didn't know what it was, and as he was tired from a long day at work, he wasn't particularly interested in playing games, so he decided to just come straight out and ask what she was wanting to discuss.

"Do you remember when I used to ask you to piggyback me down to the stables so we could see the horses? Do you remember teaching me how to ride? Or when I used to refuse to go to sleep until you, not grandma or uncle Bobby, had read me that book about the farm animals? I ask you if you remember because I remember and those are happy memories for me. I want John Ross to have those happy memories too. I don't know if it's because you don't realise or you don't care, but I don't think he is going to have those happy memories if you don't start to do those things with him. He's little, but he already has a favourite book, and he loves when grandma and Sue Ellen take him to see Chestnut, Toffee and Ace. He's not like me, he has parents who care, but that doesn't mean he doesn't also need his other family. I don't mean to be disrespectful, so please don't spank me or send me to my room for saying this, but I think you need to show John Ross you love him if you do love him, because I can tell you, it doesn't take very much for a person to realise how much or little they are actually loved. My parents weren't around when I wanted them to be, but luckily I had you, grandma, uncle Bobby and now Sue Ellen and John Ross and even uncle JR isn't as unpleasant to be around anymore; I want John Ross to grow up with the same, but better than I had".

Listening and watching his granddaughter as she spoke, Jock Ewing was shocked, not only by her gall and that she would really speak to him in the way she just had, but also by the depth of her emotions and how much her accusations actually hurt him. He loved John Ross and he had always assumed he made that very clear to everyone, but if what his wife, and now his granddaughter, were saying was true, apparently his shows of love weren't very obvious to other people. "Come here", holding his hand out to his young granddaughter, he patted the seat next to him and guided her to sit down. "I don't know when you grew up so much, but I don't think I like it", half-joking and half-serious, because he still thought of her as a little girl and strong opinions had no place in little girl's lives, he stayed silent for a few moments as he tried to figure out how to respond to her concerns and accusations. "It's not nice to say such hurtful things to someone when you're not completely certain that they're true, but I'm not going to spank you or send you to your room this time because I do believe you had John Ross' best interests at heart. I love John Ross, just like I love you, and while I can see some of your points, I don't think you're being completely fair to me. You're grown up enough now to know your situation is different to John Ross'; he doesn't need his granddaddy to be his daddy and granddaddy, and he isn't mine to primarily parent. There are some things you won't understand, but as an adult there are boundaries I cannot cross, not until I'm invited to; John Ross has parents and they are the ones that are in control for now. You have a fair point about building other positive memories though and I suppose I could do better in some aspects, but you have to understand, young babies aren't something I have a lot of experience with. It's no coincidence that your early memories of me begin when you were a little older than John Ross is now; I like being able to communicate with my children and grandchildren and as you've probably realised by now, communication is a lot easier when there are words being exchanged. I suppose I could always try more though; if you say John Ross has a favourite book and loves horses then maybe I could start there…"

Realising that he had just allowed his preteen granddaughter to guilt him into something and feeling a little humiliated that he had admitted his weaknesses to her, Jock's brief period of openness and honesty quickly ended and he closed himself off in a way that left little doubt as to where JR had learned the habit. "It's uh, getting late, and you have school in the morning. I think it's time for you to go and get ready for bed…" making a suggestion but saying it in a tone that didn't make it really sound like she had any other option, he then stood, walked over to the doorway into the foyer and waited for her to follow him. It really wasn't that close to her bedtime, but he was uncomfortable with their conversation now and retreating into the downstairs office while sending her upstairs with a task to complete was preferable to continuing talking. Perhaps he would read John Ross a story tonight and perhaps he would try to take him down to the stables on Saturday, especially since Sue Ellen wasn't around to tell him he was being too controlling, but he would make that decision himself, maybe involving his wife, or maybe not, but not simply because his granddaughter told him to. He was Jock Ewing, he was the one people listened to, not the one that was told to listen, and just because someone else had a fair point didn't mean he was content to listen and passively change his behaviour. In this case, a change in his behaviour would probably benefit everyone, but he couldn't change too quickly, he was a proud man and it wouldn't reflect well on his strong personality if it appeared he could be persuaded to act differently simply because a little girl told him to.

Watching as Lucy ascended the staircase, walking slowly, without her usual energetic demeanour, he suddenly felt guilty about shutting down her attempt to communicate with him. That damn therapist of hers had probably told her to voice her thoughts when she had something to say, that's what JR and Sue Ellen's therapist seemed to promote, but he hadn't received the memo that he had to also remain open to communication, even when it made him uncomfortable. His granddaughter looked defeated and suddenly he felt a lot more insecure and unsure than he had a moment ago. Not allowing a child to control him was not the same as not listening to her when she tried to share her thoughts and feelings with him, he hadn't understood that before, but it was clear to him now for some reason. The problem was though, all of this was new to him and he had no idea where to go to from here. He wanted to do something, but he didn't want to look like he was only acting because Lucy had told him to, but at the same time, he didn't want to upset her or make her feel unimportant by doing nothing. Sighing to himself as she disappeared down the upstairs hallway, he turned and retreated into the office. He now had two things to think about; before he did anything though, he needed a drink.

To be continued…