My dear little broccolis💚💚💚
💚Sweetie, Let Me Give You The Daddy💚
"The best investment I ever made, was when I lost fifty million dollars and met the love of my life as a result of that."
‼️Rated M - {Out Of Characters/All Human/Alternate Universe}‼️
‼️Romance/Angst/Drama/Lemons‼️
‼️AS/CG/The Greys/The Steeles/José Rodriguez/Grace Grey‼️
💚Now, in case it wasn't clear, this will be a Christian POV story. and I know you will want Ana's PoV, but it will just be Christian.
💚 READ & REVIEW, DON'T BE A SILENT READER 💚
Chapter 22: Mistletoe, Yellow TourmRos & Irish Hot Whiskey (14,1K)
So this title is well …. The mistletoe is quite obvious, the yellow tourmRos is because of the theme at the end of the chapter, and the whiskey, because it's something people drink on Christmas. ^^
Christian looked at the empty space left by Ana, but he shook off the nagging feeling inside of him. Surely, she understood that they couldn't risk her catching some silly child's disease and dying over it. He ignored Raymond and his intense gaze and mumbled that he had to go back to his daughter.
As he carefully rinsed his daughter off, he made a note to call his parents and ask them how to take care of chickenpox, and how long it lasted. He had told Ana that he would take care of things, but the truth was, he didn't even know how to take care of Grace full time when she was healthy, even less when she was sick.
When he asked her what she wanted to do, Grace said that she wanted to go back to sleep, but Christian insisted that she should have some breakfast, so Grace followed him to the kitchen, asking about her mother when she saw that only Raymond was there.
Raymond pushed the note that Ana left in Grace's direction, and Christian read over her shoulder the memo that Ana wrote.
Mama is giving you and Daddy some alone time.
I will call you soon, but in the meantime, be good.
Love, xoxo
Grace looked up at her father with teary eyes. "Is Mama leaving us?"
"No. Of course not. She is just giving me the chance to take care of you."
Christian watched his daughter nod, though it was clear that she was not convinced, and then she asked if she could go back to bed. He helplessly watched his daughter go back to her bedroom, unsure of what he could tell her or do to make her feel better.
He tucked her in, glad that her kittens were around as they jumped on her bed and curled up against her, purring to conjure the disease away.
Christian returned to the kitchen with his heart heavy, having completely forgotten about Raymond, until Raymond asked, "Do you want me to ask Carla to come and look after her this week? Chickenpox usually lasts around one week."
Grateful, Christian was about to say yes, when his eyes fell on Ana's note to Grace, and he stopped himself. He didn't want Grace to feel like both her parents were abandoning her when she was sick.
"No, I'll bring her to the office and set her up on the couch."
"You sure? Carla won't mind. She loves Grace."
"Yes. I'll feel better having her with me."
Raymond nodded and finally got up from the kitchen counter, saying that he should go. His eyes were still on Christian, holding back what he was thinking, and so Christian snapped, "Say what you want to say or go. Just stop looking at me like that!"
Raymond raised an eyebrow, and for a moment, it seemed that he would keep to himself what he wanted to say. He was halfway to the door when he turned and stared at Christian. "You know … I never pictured you as a heartless man."
"I don't care how you picture me, Raymond. I care how you keep my business in line with the law."
"I know you don't care about my opinion. I just thought you'd care about how you made the mother of your child feel."
"I'm not going to stand by and let her get exposed to something that can kill her," Christian snapped, and Raymond held his hands up in peace.
"I get that. I don't want Ana to die either. No matter what you think, I care about her. But still, you just told in cold blood to a mother that she was useless to her sick child. And it's not just any mother. It's Ana."
"She'll get over it. She knows what I meant," Christian dismissed, rolling his eyes. Ana knew he only had her best interests at heart.
"You do realise that the last time Grace was sick, Ana almost lost her. Ana spent sleepless nights, thinking of how her daughter might not wake up in the morning. And there was nothing she could do. Nothing but watch her only daughter get sicker and sicker by the day. Do you have any idea how it feels? Losing a child is not a natural thing, Christian."
Christian knew that Raymond and Carla had lost a boy in a car accident years ago. It was even sadder because they couldn't have children, and they adopted all their kids. Raymond rarely talked about his loss, but Christian still knew that it had been their first kid, the only one they adopted as a baby. He also knew that for a whole month, the child had been between life and death, before they decided to pull the plug when his brain activities ceased.
But that didn't give him the right to lecture Christian. In fact, Christian knew exactly how it felt, that fear of losing a child.
"I know how it feels. And I don't want to feel that sensation when it comes to the love of my life."
"Actually, you don't know how it feels, Christian. For three months Grace was sick before she was diagnosed properly. Ana went to see you as soon as she had a solution: you. You came, maybe you anticipated, but you don't know how it feels. Because you came with the hope, whilst Ana stayed in bleak desperation for three months.
And even now, your child only has chickenpox, and you can't bear the idea of leaving her alone, even though you know you could. And yet, you threw Ana away, telling her she was useless, whilst all she can think about is the last time her daughter was sick, she almost died.
Imagine if the roles were reversed, for a moment. Imagine Ana telling you that you're a terrible father and that you're useless in Ana's and Grace's lives. How would that make you feel? You didn't even let her say goodbye to her kid, how is that not heartless?"
When Raymond was finished with his tirade, he left and Christian was feeling like shit. All he saw was putting distance between Ana and what could endanger her, and he never tried to think of how she would feel. Especially knowing her insecurities concerning her motherhood.
No matter how many times Christian had told Ana that she was an amazing mother, there were still those times he would catch a little self-deprecating comment in what she would say. His mother said that it was because Ana felt that she had failed Grace from the start by having a cryptic pregnancy, but she didn't give him any solution on how to reassure Ana that she was doing a terrific job. According to his mother, this was something that he couldn't impose on her, something that she needed to see by herself.
He tried to call Ana, to apologise, but he went straight to voicemail. For a moment, he had a terrible feeling of déjà-vu. This was how she cut ties with him the last time. But after a couple of minutes of pure panic, he reassured himself. Ana would never leave her daughter. If she were to leave him, she would no doubt take Grace with her.
So, with a sigh, he checked on Grace who was sleeping under the surveillance of her kittens, and he picked up his phone. He texted Andrea so she would get the maid home as soon as possible (he had no idea how to cook, even less so for a sick child), and then he called his parents.
Both assured Christian that chickenpox was nothing and that he should just make sure that Grace didn't scratch herself so she wouldn't get scars. Just like Raymond did, they recommended oat baths (though Christian didn't remember being dipped in porridge as a kid), but also to wrap her hands in oven mitts so she wouldn't scratch herself in her sleep.
They also agreed with Christian that Ana shouldn't stay with them if she didn't know if she had chickenpox as a child, and Christian paled when Carrick started listing all the ways it could go wrong for adults, until his wife shushed him, probably sensing that Carrick was worrying his son more than anything.
Still, they both inquired how Ana was taking the separation and showed their surprise that she didn't put up a fight. Just like Raymond had reasoned, his mother said that it was uncharacteristic of Ana to leave her sick child behind, especially after what happened the last time little Grace got sick. Christian didn't linger on the topic, not eager to get a lecture from his parents about the way he kicked Ana out of their apartment.
He did, however, ask Andrea to send fifteen red roses to Esclava, along with a box of fine dark chocolate. He would try to call Ana later when she would have time to cool down and appreciate the chocolates.
Originally, Christian had planned to spend the day working in his office, but he took his laptop and sat on Grace's sofa, the one that had the shape of Toothless, and worked from there. She woke up a couple of times, faintly smiling when she would see him in her room, but always inquiring about her mother. Each time, she refused to eat, but as his parents had told him, he made sure that she drank a full glass of water.
Carrick had told him that she would sweat a lot due to the fever and that his main concern would be to avoid dehydration. When Christian mentioned his worry about the food intake, Carrick brushed it off. According to him, children never let themselves starve, and when she would be hungry, she would eat. He even joked saying that it was why Elliott's hunger strikes never lasted in his youth.
At some point, Christian heard activity in the penthouse, but he knew it was just the maid, probably cleaning the kitchen and making the bed in his room. Still, in the middle of the day, he had the surprise to hear someone call his name. It tore him out of his work, and Grace out of her slumber,
"Uncle Karl?" She got out of her bed, looking like a zombie, and Christian followed her out of her room, surprised to find Karl in the living room, but even more surprised to find two suitcases behind him.
Karl picked up the little girl, kissing her cheek as he let them know, "Your Mom called and said that you looked like Madam Mim. I had to see that for myself."
"Does that mean I will get magic power like her?"
"I don't know. Did you try to turn into a cat?"
Grace furrowed her brows, clearly trying to morph into an animal, but then she sadly shook her head, and Karl kissed her cheek once again, telling her,
"I brought the cartoon though. So, we can watch it together."
"Can I, Daddy?"
"Of course, sweetie. Do you want to eat something?"
She thought about it for a moment and shook her head. Karl set her up on the couch as Christian brought the comforter to his daughter, and Karl lowly explained, "Ana just thought that you might need some help for the week. She's asked Jose and me to come to make it easier on you."
"Where is Jose?"
"At work. He'll come here after."
Christian nodded, relieved that Ana thought of that because he clearly had no idea of what to do. The bath had been awkward enough for him, and just a simple dip to help Grace's rash. At least, when they moved to Seattle, his parents would be nearby to assume that kind of task.
He kissed Grace's forehead as her head rested on Karl's lap, and he reminded the man that she needed to drink. Then he went to his office to keep on working, only to be interrupted an hour later by Jamie. He frowned, clearly less happy to see Jamie than to see Karl.
"Ana called. I thought I could relieve some work from you," He said, his tone ever so professional, and Christian had to admit that it would be better if Jaimie worked with him. Sundays had always been tricky for him, because half of the globe was already starting their next week, and he had many businesses in Asia and Oceania.
So, he gestured for the man to get in, and they were only interrupted by Grace coming to sit on her father's lap for a hug after FaceTiming her mother. She had obviously been crying and was visibly upset, however, she confided in Christian that Ana had promised lasagna, waffles, and hot cocoa when she would come back.
Around nine, Jose came home with a couple of pizza pies, but Grace barely ate her slice, and it seemed to only worry Christian. Both Karl and Jose brushed it off, saying that she would eat better the next day. Still, Jose gave something to Grace that gave back a little bit of life to the little girl, her mother's necklace.
He told his Goddaughter that Ana had asked her to keep it safe for her, and Grace reverently put it around her neck. And at that moment, Christian was sure of two things. First, he would buy a similar necklace for Grace for Christmas. Second, Jose had seen Ana, and given the cold shoulder he gave Christian, he was not impressed with him.
After dinner, Grace asked if she could sleep with Christian, and he agreed with a smile, though he knew he was going in for a week of sleepless nights. He tucked her in, and she cuddled against him, softly crying that she missed her mom as she fell asleep. For a moment, he did nothing but watch his little girl sleep in his arms, peaceful but feverish, her hair already sticking to her skin. And he felt a lump growing in his stomach.
How many times in the past had Ana had that exact position? Whether it was for Grace's liver failure, or for benign illnesses such as the flu. How many things that seemed mundane and unimportant had he missed? Was Grace going to resent him as she would grow up? She was still young, and she clearly didn't understand the implications of his absence as a baby. But as she would grow up, she would.
Would she be as forgiving as her mother, or would she make his life a living hell for abandoning her before she was even an idea? He was far from being the perfect father, especially compared to his brother who took in a kid that wasn't even his own and raised him as if he was his firstborn.
Even now, even though he was present in his daughter's life, he still missed a lot of it. He messed up the routine they had by the end of summer, and only called her because Ana called him beforehand. Even with Kalie's deliberate free slots, he always had so much work that Ana had to be the one to remind him of his damn kid.
But neither girls ever complained about it. Grace understood that he was "busy", and Ana knew where his priorities lied. So, he shouldn't feel guilty doing what he liked, and providing for his girls.
With a sigh, he shook his head and kissed Grace's forehead, before leaving his room with the door slightly ajar. He found Jose and Karl in the kitchen, arguing in hushed whispers, and when he cleared his throat to make his presence known, the way Karl avoided his eyes made him sure that they had just been talking about him.
Jose harshly looked at him but did not speak a word, and so Christian asked, "I need to go for a couple of hours. Is that okay with you?"
Jose nodded, his gaze still hard, but Christian didn't linger. He was sure that Ana went on a rant to her best friend, and that Jose had many things to tell him that he was keeping to himself for Grace's sake. Or Ana's. Of which it was, Christian couldn't be sure.
He grabbed the keys for the Range Rover, even though he didn't particularly like driving those kinds of cars. At least, when they were living in Seattle, he would have his collection of sports cars back. Though Ana might argue that he would not be allowed to drive Grace around in them.
He drove to Esclava and went straight to the suite he permanently had there, feeling this odd little thing inside of him as he realised that it would be the first time in years that Ana and he would be in this room.
He was in a video call with Paris, listening to Nicholas trying to convince him to invest in yet another branch in the food industry. So far, wine and cheese had been prolific, and he couldn't complain. But then again, France was known for those products, and just having the little tricolour flag could boost a sale.
But he was not so keen on investing in a restaurant food chain. It felt he would be wasting his time and money. The restaurant business could be a dangerous mistress, and Christian would rather not dip his toes into it. If he was going to make a risky bet, he would rather do it in something different.
Nicholas was still trying to sell all the advantages of his plans when Anastasia popped in the room with his breakfast in hand. He greeted her with a nod and found himself smiling like an idiot when he saw that there was a piece of cake in addition to what he had ordered.
It was a treat she would have for him from time to time, and it would always make him smile, because of that banter they had around it.
As she deposited the food on the table, he only paid half a mind to what Nicholas was saying, saying just a couple of words to prove that he was paying attention, but Christian was solely focused on Anastasia's ass. The hotel's uniform was sinful. Or on her it was. No matter how modest it was, with the figure she had, it was sinful.
What he wouldn't give to close his laptop and bend her over the table, to swipe away the food and make her scream his name as he would fuck her into oblivion. A beautiful ass being fucked by a beautiful view.
When she turned around, he looked back at the screen, and she gave him a polite nod, making her way to leave. He held his finger up to stop Nicholas for a moment, and he let her know, "There is something for you by the TV."
He then gestured for Nicholas to go on, he would have time to explain some other day the meaning of the bracelet. Probably the next day, when she would come early and would catch him out of the shower. How he loved the way her eyes travelled over his body. It was enough to make any man bigger than he was.
He originally planned on getting her a necklace, but the one he wanted was being held for an exhibition, and overall, it wasn't bad. He might have been obsessed over fucking her with nothing but that necklace on if he had purchased it. Just like he was slightly obsessing over seeing her with her hair down. He knew it wasn't the hotel's policy, because he had seen a couple of girls with their hair down. So, it was little Miss Anastasia who was stubbornly keeping her hair up, most of the time in an elaborate bun.
If Anastasia was one thing, it was classy and elegant. As he had told her many times, she belonged as a client in this hotel, not part of the staff.
He was busy explaining to Nicholas the cons of opening a restaurant when he saw from the corner of his eyes Anastasia going back to the table where she had set his breakfast and put down the box with the bracelet in it. Was she really going to refuse a simple gift?
He held his hand up and pressed the mute button as he told her before she could even open her mouth with some stupid excuse, "I know how the tipping system works in this hotel. So, take the bracelet and do whatever you please with it. Keep it, sell it, gift it. It's yours."
"I can't accept it. It would be inappropriate, sir," she said, and he rolled his eyes. She knew very well that their encounters had been far from appropriate over the past few months. In fact, she knew very well that he would love nothing more than to make their encounters even less appropriate. But she didn't seem like the kind of girl to mess around in her place of work, and he couldn't blame her. He never fucked people he worked with. Well, he stopped fucking period for a while now.
"Don't you accept tips?"
"Yes, but —."
"No matter the amount?"
"Yes, but —."
"Then, this is my tip to you. My way to ensure that no one else gets it." He stated, starting to get annoyed. How hard was it to accept a fucking bracelet? What if he had gotten her the whole set? She might have had a heart attack, then.
He glared at her as she put the box on the coffee table, and she argued once again,
"That's why it's inappropriate, sir. As you said, we share the tips, and it wouldn't be fair to my colleagues for me to not follow the rules. Besides, I doubt that some of my coworkers would like to wear that bracelet."
He sighed, pushing the box towards her and not taking no for an answer. "I haven't seen any other of your colleagues in this room. And sure, I may have requested to have you specifically over the past couple of months, but that's because you've always done as asked, and you don't snoop around, unlike some of your colleagues. And I like the little personal touches you've made, like giving me breakfast with a view or making sure I have extra water when I come from a long flight, or those sweet cakes I keep getting ... The tip is for you, and you only."
He waited for her to accept the damn box, and when she did, he looked back at the screen, unmuting Nicholas who was looking at him with curiosity. He saw that Cho was trying to contact him as well, so he would have to wrap up France quickly, and Anastasia gave him one of her beautiful smiles as she said,
"Thank you, Mr Grey. Make sure to enjoy your cake. You might not get one for a long time."
He frowned as she left, Nicholas pressing him to just try to be a small and silent partner. For a second, Christian felt lost, before he understood. If she thought that withholding cakes would stop him from buying whatever the fuck he wanted to tip her with, she was sadly mistaken.
Of course, he only understood what she truly meant a couple of hours later, when he saw the box on the little table by the door. And though he should be annoyed, the first thought that crossed his mind was that one thing was for sure, Anastasia was not a gold digger.
As he entered the room, Christian shook off the cold feeling he had to have it so quiet. He checked the living room first, and then the master bedroom, but of course, if Ana was mad at him, she would not stay in his room. So, he went to what used to be her room and hesitated about knocking.
But he went right in, squinting his eyes as he didn't see her at first. She was laying on the bed, on her side and in the foetal position. Her laptop was set up on a chair in front of her, but the screen was dark, and he couldn't tell if she was sleeping or not. She didn't react to look at him, only throwing the covers over her head as she said,
"Go away."
Her voice broke his heart. She had obviously been crying all day, and he could hear the tears threatening to spill some more. He walked closer to her, not bothering to switch on the light, and she repeated, her voice a bit stronger and not betraying her emotions this time, "Go away, Christian."
Without giving her much of a choice, he laid beside her, on top of the covers and took her in his arms, removing the cover from her head as he profusely apologised,
"I'm sorry, babe. I am so sorry. I never meant for you to feel like that … I … I just got scared."
At those words, she burst into tears, bringing her hands to her face, and as she did so the cover brushed over her laptop, bringing it to life. Christian's eyes naturally went to it, and he saw what had her crying all day long. She was on the CDC webpage, a part highlighted, specifying that people who had transplants in the past could have complications when they had chickenpox.
He held her closer to her, turning her so she could sob in his chest and he closed her laptop, kissing her hair as he assured her, "She'll be okay, baby. I promise"
"You don't know that!" She accused, sniffling to stop herself from crying. She looked up, her blue eyes red with endless tears and she strongly told him, "I want to see my baby, Christian. I don't want her to die thinking that I abandoned her."
"She's not going to die, babe. I promise. She's been okay all day. Just hot and itchy. Nothing more. All will be well."
She shook her head, leaning against him and finding a way to blame herself. "I should have known. She has been eating less this weekend. And she's usually up early, whereas this weekend she woke up late. I - "
"You're a terrific Mom, Ana. But you're not a seer. You can't predict everything. Chickenpox least of all."
"I want to go home to my baby, Christian," Ana pleaded, and he felt on his shirt that she was crying again. For a brief second, he wondered how she managed to have such a strong voice that did not betray her feelings when her emotions were all over the place
"Babe … I can't let you come back. Not now. What if you get sick? What if you die?"
"I don't care, I'll take the risk. I might not get sick."
"I won't take that risk," he said, his voice raw with emotions. "Grace wouldn't want you to get sick. How do you think she will feel growing up if you died because of her chickenpox?"
Ana sobbed against his chest, and he tightened his grip on her, kissing her hair once again. "I promise all will be well, babe. She'll be with me 24/7."
He waited for her cries to calm down, shushing her and promising her that Grace would be okay. It took him an hour of coaxing, but finally, Ana stopped being so negative and accepted the reality that it was better for everyone if she stayed away for the upcoming week.
When he felt that she would soon fall asleep, he had a flashback of how he put Grace to sleep the exact same way. Still, he remembered something that his father had always told Elliott and him: don't go to bed angry.
"Babe? I really am sorry for the way I spoke to you. It was uncalled for. I was just terrified. You are anything but useless. I would have been a headless chicken without you. Thank you for calling the guys, and Jamie. Thank you for taking care of us from afar."
She nodded against his chest, and he put his finger under her chin so she would look at his grey eyes, and see the sincerity of his words,
"I love you." She nodded again. "Forgive me?" She nodded a third time and he smiled, pecking her lips. She gave him back a small smile, and he rocked her to sleep.
Once he was sure she was asleep, he tucked her in, just like he had done with Grace, and left her room. In the living room, he left her the black card she had always refused, with a note that explained she could use it if she wanted anything.
Babe, this is not me trying to buy your affection or forgiveness,
I just want you to enjoy this week.
After all, it's the first time you are on your own since you've had Grace.
So, go crazy, try to forget the reason you're here.
Go shopping, go to the theatre, go to a restaurant.
I know how you feel about me paying for you, but I want to do this for you.
Enjoy this unexpected week (not too much though, you're not single anymore, remember).
Please, please, do it on me. Take it as an early Christmas present.
I won't ask for anything else, I promise.
I'll call you in the morning, so you can talk to Grace
Love, Christian.
Then, he passed by the reception, just to remind them that all expenses for the penthouse were to be billed to him. He also asked them to have fifteen red roses delivered to her first thing in the morning every day of the upcoming week.
.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.
Though he had hoped otherwise, sickness did not make Grace a still sleeper. She moved and thrashed as much as usual, even punching Christian in the face and creating a very distinct black eye for him. Which he did not hesitate to complain about to Ana when she texted him to thank him for the flowers.
Look what your daughter did to me during the night. How am I going to justify that without sounding ridiculous? No one will believe a four-year-old can bruise someone like that! ~ Christian
Oh, so now she's just MY daughter? I see how it is. I'll keep that in mind for when she'll do something extraordinary and will remind you that she is MY daughter. ~ Ana
Though, if I had been home, I could have sort of covered that for you. Maybe you should ask Andrea to get you a makeup artist. Jose and Karl aren't really interested in makeup. ~ Ana
No. I'll be a caveman and say I saved a baby orphan panda from smugglers. That ought to bring me bonus points. ~ Christian
Yes. And it is so believable, especially in this part of the world. You're a real hero, Christian. We should make a statue to sing your prowess (eye roll) ~ Ana
It's only proof of my prowess to sleep with Grace. I deserve a medal. ~ Christian
Try to see it on the bright side. She could have punched something else (laughing face). ~ Ana
… I am terminating this conversation. If she knees me in her sleep, it will be your fault because you have jinxed it! ~ Christian
In the car, on their way to the office, Grace talked to her mother via FaceTime. Though she was still extremely tired (even after having spent the day sleeping) she was still excited at the idea of going to work with Christian. Especially when Ana boosted her up, saying that she was much cleverer than her father and that she should show him how it's done.
When they arrived at the office, Andrea was already there, as per usual, and she let Christian know that Ana had already called to let her know that Grace was coming. Andrea had rearranged the small sofa that was on the corner of his office, with blankets, colour books and crayons.
She had also set up a laptop so Grace could watch movies, and many small water bottles, alongside carrot and cucumber sticks, as well as cherry tomatoes and a few berries.
"Kids don't really like to eat when they're sick. So, it's always better to have them eat their water when they do," Andrea explained. Christian nodded and laid Grace on the sofa as the little girl said that she would help him in the afternoon when she would be less tired.
As he sat at his desk, Andrea gave him his coffee and told him,
"Mr Miller is already here. He is with Mrs Baileys, talking to HR. Before I give you your schedule for the day, there are a few things I must tell you.
Miss Steele called and I have arranged for a doctor to come and visit Grace, just to make sure it's benign chickenpox and nothing more. He should be here at 10. He's the best paediatrician in Manhattan. I already have an NDA prepared for him.
Miss Steele also mentioned your … nightly misfortune. And I managed to find a makeup artist that should be here any minute. If you're satisfied with him, he is happy to come back every day until the bruise is gone."
Christian nodded, repressing a grimace at the idea of having makeup on. But he didn't want to spend the whole day justifying himself, and he knew that Roger would have a field day if anyone saw him with a shiner.
"I want you to move all meetings I have today so they can happen here. And let them know beforehand that …" He glanced at Grace who was half asleep, half watching the laptop. "They should keep things PG … and quiet."
"Yes, Mr Grey. Do you want me to check as well if they're immune?"
"Yes. And cancel any meeting after five. I'll work from home in the evening."
"Very well."
She got up and left, only to buzz him a minute later and let him know that the makeup artist was there. Christian told her to let him in, and the man did not waste time in small talk, going straight to Christian and leaning him on his chair.
Christian saw from the corner of his eye that Grace briefly raised her head to see what the stranger was doing to her father, but she seemed too tired to ask questions. Ros and Jamie came in whilst the artist was still busy camouflaging his black eye, and Ros immediately snickered as soon as she saw his face,
"Oh, Christian, who gave you that beautiful shiner? I need to send them a card for putting you back in your place."
Christian glared at her, pointing at Grace as Jamie was sitting in his usual chair, and Ros marvelled, grabbing something in her bag and going to the little girl. From his chair, Christian surveyed the situation, hearing Ros lie through her teeth as she explained to his daughter that he talked about her all the time. He rarely talked about his personal life. And she gave Grace a pop-up book.
Grace studied the book, clearly more interested in the mechanics of it than the story, but then she put it on the side and slumped back to her initial position. And as he looked at this from the corner of his eye, he couldn't help but be grateful that Ana had a doctor coming to make sure all was well. He was not used to Grace being so down.
.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.
In fact, Christian was grateful to Ana for many things. He was sure that Ana had made sure that Jamie would drag him out of the office at five so he could spend some time with Grace at home. Of course, Jamie followed them there, but he worked on his own for an hour whilst Christian bonded with his daughter.
There was also the maid who came every day to make them breakfast and dinner, even though Christian didn't specify that to her. And most importantly, Jose and Karl. He had no idea how he would have gotten through the week without them.
They assumed their responsibilities of Godfathers much better than Christian did his fatherly duties. Karl even took upon himself to show Christian how to properly wash the little girl, and how to make a decent high ponytail.
Andrew also came to visit, like he did every Monday, and he brought the puzzle of a white dragon for Grace. She had been delighted, despite her fatigue.
The doctor had assured Christian that it was completely normal for Grace to be tired and to not eat. Just like Andrea had told him, he recommended Grace drink as much as possible and eat her water as well. And he also recommended putting some cream on the most persistent spots, though he agreed with Raymond and his idea of bath porridge.
Ana called three times a day, and Grace always waited for her mother's calls with impatience. Every time, she started the conversation by saying that she still had the necklace safely with her, and it only comforted Christian in his decision for a Christmas present.
It was now Wednesday, and he had put Grace to bed. She was feeling slightly better, though she was still spotty, and she was eating more than she did over the past few days. Though she still tried complicated acrobatic choreographies in her sleep, Christian didn't have the heart to put her back in her bed. Not when she was sick and missing her mother so much.
He found Jose and Jamie deep in a conversation, whilst Karl was reading, curled up in a corner. Over the past few days, Karl had been the friendliest with him. Jamie always made sure to never cross the line of professionalism, not that Christian wanted to. And Jose … Jose was clearly holding what he thought of Christian for himself.
Christian had learned via Karl that he was more than Grace's Godfather, he had been there for her birth. He was the one who convinced Ana to go to the hospital when she spent the night having cramps, he was the one who held her hand as she pushed Grace into this world, the one who cut the umbilical cord. The first one to hold her and give her a bath.
In many ways, Jose was more a father to Grace than he was. And though he would always be grateful for his presence, a part of Christian was jealous of this thing Jose shared with Ana and he would never share with her.
Yes, he could give her a second child, but even if he knew that deep down, she wanted to, he didn't. One child was already enough in his life, more than he had ever wanted, and even if he couldn't fathom a life without Grace, he knew she was enough. So, he had to come to peace with the fact that there were things that only Jose would ever share with Ana. Like their earrings.
Christian looked at Ana, gorgeous as always as she was standing beside him for yet another business function. She was wearing an elegant red dress, with the top made of velour, and the skirt made of sateen. He loved the colour red on her. It made her look … deliciously sinful.
As per usual, her hair was up, though she had two thin curls falling on her temples, bringing attention to both her neck and ears, ornamented by the set he had gotten her. Diamonds in the shape of leaves.
She was breath-taking, and for the evening, the world would envy him not just his professional success, but for the girl on his arm. He knew it. He saw how some men, regulars to these kinds of functions, would look at her with envy. But she was his. For as long as the contract was enforced, she was his and his only.
She must have felt him staring, because she turned her beautiful radiant face at him, cocking an eyebrow up, and he directed the conversation toward something that had nothing to do with what he was thinking,
"That's new," he pointed out, slightly touching the small ring on her tragus. She beamed at him as if he had told her that she had just won the lottery.
"Yes. Jose and I got it for our one-year anniversary."
"Oh …" Was all he had to say. Jose and Ana had this relationship that was obviously strong, but he never thought it was to the point they would do something so definitive together.
And somehow, it bothered him. She had physically engraved marks of her friendship with that Mia girl, and now Jose, and he wanted the same thing. He wanted to leave something on her that would always remind her of him, no matter what would happen between them.
"Are we going to get something for our one-year anniversary?"
"I was thinking of making you a croquembouche since you like sweet things so much," she said as if it were nothing, her eyes lost in the crowd, proof that she didn't think he was being serious.
"I can think of something else that is sweet that would satisfy me just as much," he whispered in her ear, his breath caressing her skin, but his lips remaining at a safe distance.
She playfully glanced at him, her beautiful blue eyes gleaming with mirth as she said, "Na-ha. What do I keep telling you? You can't have the baker and the goods. Besides, I never understood why girls are referred to as sweet when they are … salty all the way."
He burst in laughter as she wiggled her eyebrows at him, and rested his hand on hers when he recovered, his trail of thoughts not derailed from what he originally wanted. "But I was thinking of something more permanent than a pastry I'll eat within the hour. Something like … this." He traced her leg all the way to her ankle, making her shiver under his light touch.
He held her gaze for a moment, doing his best to not look at her plump lips, but to stare deep into the blue of her eyes, all the way into her soul. Her breath caught in her throat as his hand remained on her ankle, and for a moment, the world didn't exist. It was just Ana and him, in their own little bubble and nothing else mattered.
So, he broke the connection and cleared his throat, playfully saying, "On second thought, it would be a bad idea. Knowing you, you, you would have me get a tattoo that will shame me for life."
She blinked and quickly recovered, grinning, "Totally. Something along the lines, 'I'm a hottie, but I'm a perv. Beware'."
Christian sat by Karl's side, and Jose and Jamie stopped their conversation, looking at him with curiosity. Christian usually stayed in his room after Grace fell asleep, working next to his sleeping daughter until he would go to sleep himself. Or try to go to sleep given Grace's nocturnal antics.
"So … I was hoping you could help me, Jose," He started, aware of the three pairs of eyes on him, though he only focused on the Hispanic man. "What should I get Ana for Christmas?
"She said she already had that conversation with you, and she already told you what she wanted?" Jose pointed out with suspicion, and Christian repressed a sigh.
"Yeah … She asked for a date. Last time I checked, a date isn't a present of any kind."
He felt, rather than saw, Karl move next to him, closing his book, but he kept his eyes on Jose. Jose was the one who knew her best, he was the one who would be able to help him get something appropriate for her. Not just a date. The very idea of gifting her a date was insulting. As if it was all she could ask of him when it was the bare minimum in the relationship they had. He wanted to marry her, for Heaven's sake, and she was still asking for simple dates. How many times would he have to tell her for her to believe that he loved her? For her to say the words back. With her mouth, not with her actions.
Jose looked at Christian for a while, before he slowly said, weighing each of his words, "But that's what Ana wants. She wants that little bit of time when it's just the two of you. And she wants more than two seconds stolen in an office."
So, it seemed that Jose knew about the office sex that they had. Not that Christian was ashamed. There was no shame in making love to his woman, even less on top of the world. In fact, Christian had promised himself to one day take her to Dubai and fuck her on top of the Burj Khalifa.
"If you absolutely have to make it a big deal, transform the date into a weekend," Jamie said, forcing Christian to look in his direction, all the while doing his best to keep his dislike to himself. "Take her away just for a weekend. She will love you for it."
No matter how much he disliked the man, he had to admit that this idea appealed to him. He still felt it wasn't much of a present, but it would mark her much more than some silly date lost amongst the other. He could arrange for his parents, or Elliott, to take care of Grace. Especially knowing that he needed to go to Dubai sometime in January.
He was only comforted in his idea by Jose who added, smirking, "Yeah, make it a weekend. Somewhere hot, because she loves the heat. She sent me so many emails complaining about the rain in London."
Christian nodded, his phone already in hand so he could get Andrea to look at his schedule in January. The last week would be perfect. It was when he usually checked on his investment in real estate in Dubai. Twice a year, once in January, once in July.
Still, he wished he could give her something that she would be able to hold, something real and not fleeting like a memory. It must have shown on his face because Karl cleared his throat and said,
"If you absolutely want to get her something material, why not get her something personal and meaningful just for the two of you? Not necessarily something that blings, but … something like what she got you for Thanksgiving."
Once again, Christian nodded, keeping for himself the shame that he still didn't open her present. He could go now and see what it was, but he didn't want to make it obvious that he had completely forgone the present she had for him. Moreover, knowing Ana, it was probably some trinkets that would echo their past banter.
.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.
The next day, Grace was feeling much better and her fever was gone, even though Christian still had to remind her every now and then to stop scratching herself. She was done with watching cartoons, all too consumed with her new puzzle that she had insisted on bringing to his office. She said that he would need to keep it, so his office could have some dragons because it was sad there were none.
He had an early lunch with Grace, happy to see her eat again like a normal child, and then left her in his office so he could participate at a video conference. She was feeling good enough now and barely paid attention to him, anyway. Still, Andrea promised to keep an eye on her.
He was the first one in the meeting room, his brain going to the upcoming trip he had to make to Seattle. After Ros's incessant pleas, he had decided to take an intern, and she had found the perfect one for him, so he needed to check out the candidate.
Now, Ros was still in New York, interviewing a few candidates to replace the disaster that had been Theo, and Christian kept pushing for her to just poach someone out of another company. He did believe in starting from the bottom, Jamie was the perfect example of that, but he also believed that it was untenable to form a fresh graduate to the level he expected of Ros and Jamie. Only someone who already had their feet in it would fit.
He was lost in his thoughts when he received a picture that made him fondly smile and momentarily forget about his work issues. Ana was standing in front of a mirror, with nothing but black lingerie and her heels.
I want you to mark this day in your calendar, I bought something with your card. I think I deserve a treat. ~ Ana
I can think of a treat … a good treat that's been longing for you all week. When you come back, I'll treat you so good, you'll be the one on bed rest for a week 🍆🍆🍆. ~ Christian
He watched the three dots indicating that Ana was responding to him, but his grin faded away when he heard two distinct voices, bringing him to the present.
"Well, that's a sight I could get used to," Ros said salaciously.
"That's something I did not need to see," Jamie whined, with a grimace on his face.
Christian glared at the two of them, quickly putting the phone in his pocket and annoyed at the interruption.
"You're married. Keep your eyes on your wife," He growled at Ros. He already had enough on his hands with Jamie, he didn't need Ros to start lusting over Ana either.
Ros rolled her eyes, sitting next to him and nudging him in the ribs. "I'm married, Christian. Not blind. Only weirdos like Jamie don't get aroused when they see a beautiful woman with so little clothing. And even Helen agrees to say that Ana's hot. Maybe we should propose her a nice threesome. I'm sure Ana is bored in bed now."
Christian's glare intensified, and he fisted his hand beneath the table as he hissed between his gritted teeth, "Keep your eyes and hands to yourself and stay the fuck away from my wife."
Jamie whipped his head to him, as Ros echoed, "Wife, eh? I had no idea that you popped the question already. Though you're right, someone like Ana, you should snatch up as soon as you know. I would have made a move on her if I wasn't married already."
Christian ignored her, opening the file in front of him with a temper, and doing his best to ignore Jamie's eyes on him as well. Jamie never talked about Ana. In fact, he never talked about himself, making sure to keep professional and personal separate. And Christian was far from minding. He would just like it more if Jamie's personal life had nothing to do with Ana.
He was sure that Jamie wished Ana had sent him the picture of her in lingerie, and a part of him felt smug that Jamie saw that. She was his, and Jamie would never be anything to Ana.
Still, he made sure that Jamie understood that what had been said in this room would remain in this room, though he addressed Ros, keeping his eyes on Jamie, "I haven't asked her yet. It's in process. So, keep quiet."
"Depends, are you going to invite me to your wedding?" Ros teased, and Christian rolled his eyes, finally looking away from Jamie.
"Depends, are you going to ogle my wife then too?"
"Nah, my wife will be with me. I'll be too busy scowling at her ogling your wife."
Christian rolled his eyes once again and cleared his throat as the other attendees of the meeting were coming in. Ros had always liked to tease him about his lack of love-life, and ever since Ana came back in his life, she loved to tease him about his new love life. And it seemed that she liked nothing more than to get under his skin and get him jealous, even though he knew that she was happily married to the love of her life.
.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.
The month of December flew by at an extreme speed. It only felt like yesterday to Christian when Ana came back to their apartment, Grace clutching her as if her life depended on it. In fact, he was sure that this brutal separation made the girls even closer than they were before.
In all honesty, he barely had time to spend with the girls. Between his travels to Seattle and Europe, and his late nights in conference calls with the rest of the world, Christian barely saw the girls. But Ana still made sure that he would wish goodnight to Grace, and she would send him random pictures of the two brunettes in New York every now and then.
Grace had been delighted by the snow that came, and Ana took plenty of pictures since it was the first time Grace was seeing real snow. According to Ana, she was a bit disappointed that she wouldn't find snow in Seattle, but Ana always managed to curb her disappointment by reminding her that she would spend Christmas with her family.
Work-wise, Jamie was still with him (and still spending time with Ana whenever they were in New York), and he was helping Christian with his new intern. Roxanne. He was quite happy with this acquisition, because even though she was doing an internship because she was new to the world of business, she already had a career elsewhere, and therefore she already had life experience.
They moved to Seattle a few days before Christmas, and Christian loved being back in his hometown. Grace had been over the moon by the Christmas decorations they found waiting for them, though she pouted a little when she realised that her room was still not next to her parents. Not that her parents minded.
One thing that Christian particularly appreciated over the month of December was the fact that Ana and he made love almost daily. In fact, there had been some days where his only solace had been to know that he would get to go home and lose himself in the arms of the woman he loved.
He did take her out on a couple of occasions, when he received business partners, or when he had a function, and Grace managed to get the promise out of him that he would take her out as well one day so she could dress in a beautiful dress, like her mom.
Now, it was Christmas Day, and Christian was with the girls at his parents' house around the golden Christmas tree. He had promised Ana to keep his business calls to a minimum if they stayed with his parents, and so far, he had managed to stick to his promise. Jose and Karl had followed them to Seattle to celebrate Christmas with them, though they needed to go back by the 28th. And of course, Jamie had been invited.
They were all unwrapping their presents, Ana clearly put out by the amount that were labelled for Grace, but she did not say a word. Amongst her many gifts, Grace received a bike with all the gear from her Uncle Elliott, an illustrated version of the Lord of the Rings from his father (which Christian judged out of her age, but he knew that his father was a fanatic trying to pass on his passion), a couple of fish from his mother (and now, he was sure that Grace would ban eating fish at home as well), a whole set to make traditional candles from Ana, an aquarelle set from her Godfathers and a cat tree from him.
Of course, she also had many other things to which Ana only pursed her lips, under his kisses and Elliott's laughter, but when Grace opened the necklace, he had gotten her, there were two very different reactions. Grace jumped in his arms and immediately asked to have it around her neck. But Ana slightly furrowed her brows before harbouring a radiant smile, though Christian could tell she was just pretending.
Ana had mostly gotten people homemade things, and everyone appreciated the time and effort she had put in the gifts. And the gifts she received were all very … personal. Apparently, he was the only one who didn't know his girlfriend well enough. Strangely enough, Jose and Karl had nothing for her. Or it seemed this way, because the way Ana and Jose looked at each other, it seemed that they had exchanged gifts away from the prying eyes.
Elliott's gift was the most troublesome to Christian. A diary, with a handmade cover and recycled paper. Exactly the kind of thing Ana liked. But … what need would she have of a diary when she had him to talk about anything that could trouble her. It seemed that Elliott was pushing Ana to keep secrets from Christian, and he didn't like it one bit.
Carrick got her a teddy bear. A simple brown teddy bear with a big red bow and it made Ana smile like a child. For a moment, Christian was destabilised, because if anything, Grace should be the one receiving that kind of childish gift, but then he understood. Ana never had that gesture in her life. A father gifting her something to ward off the nightmares, and Carrick acknowledging that, and fulfilling this thing that she never had must have struck a chord.
And his mother gave Ana a book he had seen many times in his youth, the recipes she had inherited herself from her mother. It seemed that everyone had understood that Ana appreciated the personal value of the gift, more than the monetary value. Everyone but him.
Before she turned to his presents, she opened the slim box from Jamie but never revealed what was in it, even though it clearly shook her. For a brief second, Christian thought she was going to cry before she closed the box and mouthed thank you to Jamie, who had the audacity to look smug and happy with himself.
And of course, everyone decided to be polite and not ask about the content of the box.
Then it came time for Ana to open his gift, and he suddenly felt like shit. He should have stuck to the weekend away and nothing else. But of course, she had to open the other one first. He was almost tempted to snatch it off her hand, but she still opened it. It was a charm bracelet, with little charms from every country they went to. He had Andrea work around the clock to find them in time.
Ana frowned at first, a polite smile on her lips until she got the meaning of the bracelet, and she leaned to kiss him, before clasping the bracelet around her wrist, and Christian felt a wave of relief. At least he didn't completely blow it. When she opened his envelope, he was half paying attention, answering Grace who was asking if she could get a big tank for her fishes, so he was surprised when Ana kissed his cheek and whispered in his ear that he was the best.
He turned to her, and she smiled brightly at him, beaming at the idea of a weekend getaway with him. And so, he kissed her, not caring about his family around them, not caring about Jose and Elliott cheering them on, not caring about Julian making a disgruntled sound. All he cared about was this smile he had put on his girl's lips.
When they broke their kiss, she was still smiling brightly, though she was obviously embarrassed, and he pecked her cheek before focusing on his presents. He had stopped caring a long time ago about presents, mostly because anything he wanted, he could get it himself.
So, he mostly opened his presents to humour Grace who was more excited than him to see what he got. As he had expected, he received a few trinkets from his family, along with the eternal socks and ties, not that he could blame them, he wanted for nothing, so there were no big gifts for him.
Grace had gotten him a frame of New York with the girls in it, so he could have a picture of them in his Seattle office as well. And she had also made him a bowl made of glass. Apparently, she and Ana went to the glass factory to blow him something special.
Though he did not say a word, he was surprised that Ana had picked that out of all raw material, glass was his favourite. In fact, he had always thought that, had he not made it as the successful businessman he was now, he would have blown glass for a living. There was something mesmerising and powerful in seeing the hot red glass expand until it had the desired form.
Ana also made something out of glass for him, two little animals. An elephant, and a panda. And he knew that the panda was a last-minute addition, after his shiner by Grace. She also had for him cufflinks with a matching tie clip and miniature representations of all his cars.
He smiled at her, because, though Ana did not seem to even want to share his passion for cars, Grace had been quite impressed by her father's toys when she came to Seattle. He understood now that she had been in on the secret because her first reaction when she saw his cars was to say, "They look like —" before her mother stopped her with one look.
Finally, he found a rather thick envelope with Ana's delicate handwriting on it.
To: Christian. For you to open at your own discretion.
From: Mrs Santa ^^
For a moment, Christian was tempted to open it there and then, but then he decided to keep it for later. He folded the envelope and put it in his back pocket, not sure he wanted to open it in front of his whole family. Knowing Ana, it could be something quite naughty, especially since she signed it "Mrs Santa', and he didn't want to have to think of others in that case.
Still, he tried to probe and see where Ana's mind was as he whispered in her ear, "You know, you can still give me the present I really wanted. I'm pretty sure the envelope can't top that. All you have to do is stand and let me do the rest."
He had the box with him, just in case, it felt like the right moment to do it. She looked deep in his eyes, and for a moment, he felt that she knew exactly what he had in mind, that he wanted to propose. But she shook her head, a teasing light illuminating her eyes as she said,
"I know that nothing will ever top what's in this envelope. You'll see when you'll open it."
Once again, he pondered before deciding against it. "Tonight, babe. When it will be you, me, and the darkness of my room."
"Christian," she tried to chastise him, and he magically produced mistletoe so she couldn't refuse his kiss.
In fact, all day long, he chased her around with mistletoe in his hand, claiming kiss after kiss, only encouraged to keep doing so by the liquor his father gave him.
They spent the day as they usually did, except this time the house was much more animated than usual, to his mother's delight. The adults drank a lot of wassails, they all played many games, sang karaoke (to which Elliott, Karl and Christian had been forbidden to sing after two butchered songs). Grace played dress-up with Jason and her grandparents.
And Christian found every excuse in creation to have Ana in his arms. Mistletoe, to protect her against bubble attacks, to pout in her arms when he lost a game. Every excuse was good to have her in his arms and to kiss her. Even more, it became even funny, when Julian, in his typical moody teenager way, complained that they were "sickeningly sweet".
"You're just jealous you can't do it with your own date," Christian retorted, stealing another kiss from Ana, and Julian's ears became red like Santa.
Of course, Ana and his mother tried to chastise Christian, but he couldn't care less. He was not sure if it was the alcohol, or if he was just happy, but he was on cloud nine. Things didn't seem so bad after all. Even Jamie being here wasn't so much of an issue after all.
When they all went to bed, it was past two in the morning, and Christian was definitely more than tipsy. He liked to think he wasn't drunk, but rationally speaking, he knew that she shouldn't blow in an FST.
As soon as they were in his childhood room, Christian engulfed Ana in a bear hug, and kissed her with passion, quickly helping her out of her white woolly dress. All-day long, this had been in the back of his mind. All he thought about. Slipping her out of her dress, and kissing more than just her lips and face.
"You are so beautiful, Ana. So fucking beautiful," he said, undoing her bun and setting her hair wild.
Then, he laid her on the bed, caressing her skin, but when he cupped her breast over her bra, Ana moaned in complaint, "Christian …"
"Babe …" He responded, grinding against her and sucking on that spot he knew she liked on her neck.
"We're at your parents."
"And I was a teenager, once. I sneaked girls into this room, and no one ever knew about it."
"Well … that killed the mood," She said with a laugh. He frowned, trying to get her back to her horny state. Alcohol always made her horny and bold.
"You know what I mean, babe."
"Christian … How would you feel if I tried to lure you to bed in Jamie's house, telling you about the guys I fucked in the past?"
He groaned, rolling on the side and knowing that she was right. If she had been the one saying that, he would have thrown a fit. Or taken his jealousy out on her. But then again, Ana never showed any sort of jealousy. Not that she had any reason to be, but sometimes, he wished she would, it would show that she cared, that she loved him.
Ana pecked his lips and he turned to caress her face, preventing her from getting up and probably going to get ready for the night. "You really are beautiful, Anastasia Steele. The most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on."
"And you really are drunk, Christian Grey. But it's okay, I love drunk Christian. He's always fun to be around. Maybe I should get Jamie to get you drunk occasionally, so you'd come home like that."
His jaw tensed at the mention of Jamie, and he recalled how she had kept his present hidden from the world. This was as good a time as any to ask about it. "What did he get you? A spare key to his place to come and see him when I'm not here?"
"What? Don't be ridiculous. It was just an old memory."
Christian hmphed, and Ana looked deep in his eyes, something in her expression changing as she closed her face. He was about to apologise when she smiled, kissing his lips and getting up to look through her presents. Then, she gave him a picture in a frame and sat back next to him.
It was a picture of the Philadelphia Museum, with a bunch of little kids in front of the steps that Rocky made famous. There were eight kids. Ranging from four to what seems to be fifteen. And at the far right, he saw a young brunette of maybe seven with blue eyes, her arms protectively swung across a little mixed kid standing in front of her.
None of the kids in the picture were smiling. In fact, some of them were scowling. But Christian only focused on little Ana. The picture seemed to have been taken in summer because all kids were in T-shirts. She had her hair up in a messy ponytail and was one of the kids scowling at the camera. He saw the discoloured patches on her arms, the way she looked too skinny, the way her clothes were obviously too big for her.
But he also saw why this almost made adult Ana cry when she opened her present. This was the only picture she had of her childhood. The only proof that time passed, that she had been a child once. The only thing she could show her daughter when Grace would ultimately ask about her mother's past.
And suddenly, he felt a surge of anger against Jamie. This was the one thing he would never be able to give to Ana. A past. And Jamie fucking Miller came on his white horse and dropped that picture on her lap. She would never remember anything from this Christmas, anything but that picture. That picture was bound to be one of the five objects Ana will want to put in her box in the future. And Jamie had given it to her.
Twice already he had tried to find something for Ana, something to give her back her past, but both times the PIs came back empty-handed. Whilst fucking Jamie had this picture with him.
"Where the fuck did he get that?" He asked, more abruptly than he had meant. Ana retook possession of her precious picture and put it aside with the rest of her presents, before cuddling back against him.
"He just goes back to Philly from time to time. I guess he's braver than me. But he says that he'd like me to come with him next —"
"Absolutely not!" Christian cut her off, before cursing himself. Once again, alcohol made him sound much curter than he had wanted. Ana looked up and blinked before she stated the obvious:
"You don't like Jamie."
Christian got up and looked for a shirt in his old wardrobe as he played with words. "I never said that. He's amazing at his job, and I said I'll stand by your side. It's just … how would it look if my girlfriend goes out of state for a whole weekend with my trainee?"
He threw a shirt on and removed his jeans. As he did so, Ana's envelope fell from his pocket, and he put it on the stack of presents, ready to jump in bed and take his girl in his arms, but as he did so, Ana murmured, almost to herself,
"It's funny how you get to be offended if I don't accept your presents, but you constantly dismiss the ones I have for you."
With guilt, he recalled that he still did not open the Thanksgiving gift, and so he took the envelope, enquiring about what he left in New York. "I'm sorry about Thanksgiving. What am I missing?"
"Nothing, really. It's just a stupid deck of cards that made me think of you," She said, sitting up and putting her chin on her knees. He sat in front of her, ignoring how alluring she was in just her underwear, and he apologised.
"I'm sorry, babe. I should have opened it at once. But nothing you get me will ever be stupid."
She shrugged, and he kissed her, looking back at the envelope. "Shall I try to guess?"
"You can try."
"Is it coupons for unlimited, wild sex?" She rolled her eyes. "Is it … you admitting by writing that I got the cake, I ate it, and I got the baker?"
"Not even close."
"Is this …"
"Just open the damn envelope, Christian. I'm knackered, and I want to sleep a little before dawn."
He chuckled and tore open the letter. In hindsight, he wished he would have taken the time to open the envelope properly, Ana had obviously taken the time to make it herself, and it held the best present he had ever gotten. Hands down. In fact, he was glad that she had put this little warning at the front. She knew him well enough to know he wouldn't want his family to see him like that, choking on his emotions and blinking to keep his tears at bay.
Grace Marianne Grey
Grace had his name. His name. So many times, since he had learned about her, he had been annoyed at hearing his daughter referred to as Miss Steele, but he never said a word to Ana. Mostly because he knew he was to blame. If it hadn't been for her illness, he would have done his best to stay out of her life, and he certainly wouldn't have wanted her to have his name.
So, he had figured this was something he would have to bear. Grace would only have his name when Ana would. But Ana, being the attentive person that she was, must have picked on his annoyance, and she gave him what he never dared ask for.
He saw how his Gerald Thomas's name was also on the paper, which made him feel that Ana had taken care of everything and that starting from this day, Grace was a Grey.
He looked at Ana, who was expectantly looking at him, and he grabbed her face, kissing her with love and passion. "You're amazing, you know that?"
His hands were all over her, but unlike earlier, it wasn't out of lust, but out of love. Love for this woman who knew him so well that she knew of the things he kept inside him, this woman who was always by his side when he needed her, this woman who not only gave him a daughter but a hearth, a family.
In the blink of an eye, he got rid of his boxers and his shirt, and he played with her clit, making her as wet as he was hard, his lips never leaving hers. She moaned against his lips, but broke their kiss, trying to be reasonable, but all he wanted at this moment was to connect with her the only way he knew how.
"Christian, wait …"
"Please, babe. Don't ruin this for us." He aligned himself, pushing her panties to the side, and she once again tried to bring reason in the midst of their loving passion.
"Christian. We don't have any condoms. Please."
"I'll pull out, babe," He promised, plunging in her and loving feeling her so warm and wet around him. She could say what she wanted, but condoms were taking away something from their lovemaking.
He started going in and out, immediately looking for her mouth again, but she had turned her face, her body incredibly still, and it was as if a bucket of cold water fell on him. He immediately retrieved himself, sitting on the edge of the bed and not daring to look at Ana as shame and guilt consumed him.
His heart was hammering, and he felt bile rising up, but he refused to throw up. He felt … dirty. He felt like a creep. Worse than a creep. He felt like …
He heard Ana get up and go to the bathroom, but he did not dare look at her. With a shaky hand, he grabbed his pyjama trousers, and put them on, still struck by what just happened. He had no idea how long he remained sitting, looking into the void and doing the best to ignore the way his brain was screaming at him. Of all the fucked things he had done in his life, this was probably the worst.
He heard Ana coming out of the bathroom, but still did not dare look at her. If she packed up, took Grace and left in the middle of the night, he couldn't blame her. But he felt her lay in the bed, the faint smell of coconut invading his nostrils. He turned, only to see that she had her back to him, but she had braided her hair and was in her PJs.
"Ana …" He started, his voice cracking. How could he tell her how sorry he was? How disgusted by himself he was? He would love to be able to blame it on the alcohol, but he knew it wasn't excuse enough. There was never an excuse for that kind of behaviour. Just some fucked up people behind it.
"I'm just tired, Christian. Goodnight," She said with a cheery smile, kissing his lips, and Christian felt his bile come back up. He hated that she felt the need to make him feel good when it should be the other way around. He reached for her arm, but stopped himself, trying once again to apologise,
"Babe … I—"
"It's nothing, Christian. Really. Stop beating yourself up over it and get to sleep," She said, laying back down, her back facing Christian again.
He looked at her, replaying the scene second by second. She had wanted it, but she did mention the lack of condoms as well. And instead of listening, he coaxed her even more, imposing a compromise she never agreed to. And …
And she seemed too fucking comfortable and used to this situation! This seemed nothing like the Ana he knew, the Ana who assured him time and time again that she could defend herself, the Ana who did not hesitate to challenge Jamie, despite his imposable size.
Ana always spoke her mind, and yet, at that moment, she had chosen inaction, and it almost felt like second nature. The way she became still, the way she turned her head to the side, the way she got up afterwards as if it was completely normal!
Once again, he felt a lump in his throat, and he got up, moving to be on Ana's side of the bed, crouching on the floor to look at her as he switched on the light. There was no trace of tears on her beautiful pale face, just resignation, and he asked, his voice wavering,
"You … you do know that I'd never … you do know you always have the final say, right?"
She gave him a reassuring smile, but he wanted to hear her speak. He had seen her play poker enough to know that he could not always read her face. She reached for his face, and he felt a strange mix of relief and disgust washing over him. She didn't recoil from him, but by all means, she should.
Shakily, he took her hand in his, kissing her palm, and he asked, his voice still trembling, "You … has … you … you've never had to do something you didn't want to, right?"
"It doesn't matter, Christian. All I care about is that you know me enough to have stopped. I really appreciate that."
As she said the words, something broke in him, and he fell on the floor, hiding his face in his hands. It wasn't because he stopped that it made the infamy any less ineffable. This was the second time he was reminding her of that fucking abject ex of hers. She might have not said the words, but he knew that fucking Henry made her feel that exact same way.
"Babe … I … I don't want ever to make you feel like you have to put out. That's not what I'm supposed to do. I'm supposed to make you feel loved, and cherished and worshipped. Not like … not like that.
And I don't want to feel like that either. I feel like a r… I feel like a creep."
"Christian," She said, putting her hand on his bicep and waiting for him to look at her. "You're not thinking clearly. Your brain is obviously mixing everything up. Just come to bed, please."
He looked deep in her eyes, trying to see if she meant it, or if she was placating him. But as she said, his brain wasn't all there. Even though the very thought of what happened earlier sobered him up, he wasn't thinking clearly, his mind heavy with sleep. Which was probably why he accused,
"This wouldn't have happened if you were on the pill."
She frowned, not happy that he brought up this topic, and she strongly said, "I told you, I don't want to take it."
"Yeah, but we are both in this relationship. It's not just about you. It's about us. We're both affected by your decision, and it's not fair. You shouldn't be the one and only making that decision.
And … it makes me feel like you don't trust me. It makes me feel like you think I'm going to dip it elsewhere the first chance I get and bring home some disease, so you need to protect yourself."
"You're really not making sense, Christian. You're being paranoid. I never thought you'd go elsewhere. I trust you. Now come to bed," She scolded him, but he was on a rant.
"You trust me? If you trusted me, you would take the pill. Because it would mean you would trust me with your health the same way I would trust you not to get pregnant behind my back."
"Is that how you feel?" She asked, and when he nodded, he saw something that made him feel even worse than before if it was possible. Something died in her eyes. He couldn't exactly say what it was, but a light died in her eyes as she said, her voice barely louder than a whisper,
"I'll take the pill if it matters so much to you, Christian."
"Babe …"
"Please come to bed. I'm tired, and I want to enjoy a bit of Christmas night in your arms."
He did as she asked, not saying another word, but it took him forever to find sleep. Ana almost immediately fell asleep, like she always did, and even though she asked for him to take her in his arms, and she was cuddled against him, she had never felt so far away.
❌PLEASE DO NOT COPY, DOWNLOAD OR SHARE THIS ANYWHERE OTHER THAN HERE❌
.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.
💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚
💚 So, Ana received a diary. I will put entries of that diary in exclusivity in the FB group. They're like little bonuses. So, if you're interested in them, stay tuned in Mina's broccolis
💚 And I don't think you're going to like Christian a lot in those next couple of chapters. Though I'm pretty sure he could kill someone in the most gruesome way, and some of you would still be okay with him, XD
💚Now question time,
1. Okay, let's tackle the heavy first. Christian immediately stopped, and he does feel like shit for what happened. It's a thin line I am playing with because she did express that she didn't want to go further, but he did stop as soon as he felt that she wasn't in it with him. I know how it can come across, and this is exactly how he feels at the moment. So, without you guys attacking me, how do you feel about that moment?
2. What did you think of Ana's present to Christian? And what do you think is in the Thanksgiving box? Just a stupid deck of cards?
3. And the condom conversation came back, and did something to their relationship … I think it's obvious, but can you tell?
4. And Jin is coming for New Year, whilst Grace is invited to Hong Kong for Chinese New Year. Isn't it just cute?
5. And how do you think Christian handled that whole chickenpox thing? And he also has someone else who works with him ...
6. As per usual, what was your favourite part? Mine was Jamie and Ros's reaction to the picture.
7. And what do you think will happen next?
💚 E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, Everything else is mine (including the mistakes and grammar errors).
Love, Mina 💚💚💚