Dallas, Texas

"…so it sounds like what your mama was saying last night is correct, and I don't see why it wouldn't be. Lucy adores John Ross and when you really get to know her she's a very sensitive girl, so I don't doubt that she noticed your daddy's lack of involvement just like the rest of us did, she was just bold enough to say something, and it worked. I'm sure you probably have a better idea of your daddy's thoughts than I do, but it sounds like he didn't want to fail at being a grandfather so he just didn't even try; Lucy coached him through it though and I think he's finally begun to realise making any effort better than making none at all. Nobody gets everything right at first, but it's not like John Ross is judging anyone, he just likes it when you show him positive attention and he's not reserved with his feelings like the rest of us are, if you show him love, he will return that love, I think Jock's now realised that. I imagine that's what the dinner invitation and request for more weekend visits is about, he's realised that he enjoys not just the way it sounds to say he has a big, happy family, but the way it feels too. With that in mind, I'm feeling more confident about those visits now than I usually would be, especially after some of the disagreements I've had with your daddy before. As long as he sticks to his role as a grandfather and doesn't try to weasel his way in and pretend he has parental rights to tell us how to raise our son, and as long as he doesn't try to push John Ross the way he did you, then I'm supportive of this change. I want John Ross to have a good relationship with his grandparents and I know your mama wants that too, but so far she's the only one whose approach to making that happen I actually support. She made mistakes with her children, she admits that, but she regrets them and I honestly believe she wants the best for John Ross now and if she could go back and change the past, she would. I trust your mama and I love your mama and if your daddy and my mother made even half the effort Miss Ellie does then I think John Ross would truly have the absolute best of everything. Life is what it is though and I'm not interested in trying to change my mother anymore, I am interested in encouraging John Ross to bond with the family he has here in Dallas though and for the first time in a while I feel very positive about that".

Nodding as he listened to Sue Ellen explaining much the same information as his mother had explained the previous evening and what he already knew from experience, JR's ears pricked up as she began to speak about his mother. He knew she loved his mother and at times in the past she had been her only real support, but he hadn't realised how deeply connected they were and he had no idea at what point in their relationship they had begun to discuss her mistakes and regrets. What he did know was that the idea of his mother and wife discussing parenting mistakes and regrets made him a little uncomfortable; it wasn't like discussing parenting with Doctor Williams in that Sue Ellen received unbiased feedback, with his mother he was sure whenever she responded to Sue Ellen's concerns, she was reflecting on what could've been with Gary. To him, at this point in his life, it seemed unbelievable that it would be any other way; his mother had dropped most involvement and interest in his life the moment Gary had appeared and in the decade since Gary had been away she hadn't exactly tried to reconnect with him. Sure, there had been a couple of times they had had honest, caring conversations regarding his relationship with Sue Ellen, and he didn't hate her, but they weren't close and he highly doubted she had even thought about their relationship enough to have regrets about it.

Sitting quietly eating his dinner as he considered his wife's words, JR finally spoke just as he could see Sue Ellen beginning to get antsy, "mm, I agree. It's good for John Ross to have family in his life, but only if that family have his best interests at heart". If he never had to deal with Patricia Shepard again it would still be too soon, but too with his father, he understood where Sue Ellen was coming from and he had no intention of allowing him to control how John Ross was raised now just because he had taken an interest in him. "I'm afraid I don't quite understand why you're so supportive of mama though. Don't get me wrong, I love my mama too, and I see it too, she loves John Ross and she loves being a grandmother again, but I don't understand why her mistakes with Gary would have anything to do with John Ross. Is she afraid of coddling John Ross like she did Gary? If she is, I don't think she needs to be, just like daddy, she's not his mother, she doesn't have to do anything but act like a grandmother; and if that's not it, then what is it? You said she has regrets and she would change things if she could, but where and how? She worships Gary, I highly doubt she sees anything wrong with the way she parented him, other than that she couldn't keep him here I suppose; again though, I don't see why that would affect her relationship with John Ross". Voicing a few of his confused thoughts, he grew even more puzzled as Sue Ellen crinkled her forehead and grew silent; she was either hiding something from him or he was missing a huge, obvious point. Watching her sit silently for a moment and then take a drink, he wasn't too surprised when she did eventually speak, though he would be lying if he said her words didn't fill him with dread; "ehm, I think we need to talk". Of course they needed to talk, the talk they were having now had left him with more questions than he had initially had and he was in no mental place to just drop the conversation and move on to other activities. "We're talking now… what is it you wanted to discuss? Before that though, can you please answer my questions, because I am thoroughly confused"; finishing his final bite of food, he placed his knife and fork next to each other, folded his napkin and took a drink, he didn't know what Sue Ellen was getting at right now, but something told him he might need another drink later.

To be continued…