xXx
Aang used his chopsticks to pick at his fried rice. All was quiet as the Gaang ate their dinner in the kitchen. It wasn't a complete silence, there was the clinking of bowls and the occasional overdramatic screams from Sokka when Momo stole his food. But there wasn't any talking, no conversations. Nobody knew what to say. They ate their food and occasionally made awkward eye contact before hurriedly turning their attention elsewhere. Like watching Toph pick her feet (actually - not a fun thing to watch while eating).
The rhythmic scraping of stone on metal was the most prominent noise. Zuko had already finished his food and was currently occupied with sharpening his dao swords (and Sokka's boomerang, he gave up protesting after the endless nagging). The rest of the Gaang would sneak hurried glances at the firebender when he wasn't looking. Aang knew that his friends were thinking of a way to get Zuko to talk. He already decided that he wasn't going to help them - but he wasn't going to stop them either. Maybe Zuko really did need a reminder that he could confide in them. But there was a part of Aang that really didn't want to know how Zuko got his scars.
It was pretty easy to forget that Zuko was related to Azula and Ozai. He was nothing like them. And then he would talk to them and say "my sister" or "my father" and then things would get awkward. Because they knew that Zuko hated his family just like the rest of them, but they were his family. He was fighting his family. Aang would have to fight and defeat his father. That's mega-awkward to talk about in front of him. That was already bad enough, but if his father physically abused Zuko too- that scared Aang. He was going to have to fight a man who had no problem with scarring his own son.
Aang was startled out of his thoughts when Katara broke the silence.
xXx
Katara looked around at her taciturn friends and frowned. If they weren't going to start this, then she would.
"Sokka," She started. For some reason Aang jumped about a foot in the air when she spoke. "Do you miss the South Pole?"
Sokka clearly didn't know where she was going with this, but he went along after a stern look from her. "Umm, yeah, I guess. I miss Gran-gran, and I miss the blubbered seal jerky, and I miss the authority that I had as the only warrior" (Katara rolled her eyes at this). "But at the same time, I'm glad we left. I would never have known what the world was like outside of the poles, or been able to bash some firebender's heads in, or meet Suki" (His girlfriend planted a kiss on his cheek after he said that).
"I don't really miss Kyoshi Island," Suki mused. "I miss the Kyoshi Warriors. They're still in prison, and I don't even know where. They were my family, and now we're separated."
"Don't worry," Sokka reassured. "We'll find them. And they can take care of themselves, they have a great teacher." Katara grinned as Suki gave her brother a grateful smile. They were honestly the cutest couple.
"Well I don't miss my parents," Toph declared in a loud voice. Katara knew that Toph loved her parents and even missed them a little, but the tough earthbender would never admit that. "And I certainly don't miss pretending to be bad at earthbending. Being able to whoop your guy's butts whenever I want is the best thing ever!" To emphasize this, Toph stomped her foot and sent Sokka flying into the air. He landed with an "oomf" on the floor.
"Why do you feel the need to do that," Sokka groaned, lying dramatically on the ground.
"Oh relax, Snoozles. It's to keep you on your toes. You'll thank me later." Toph was not making any efforts to hide her amusement.
Katara felt that the current discussion was getting off topic. Zuko hadn't said anything, and was now (very reluctantly) sharpening Sokka's boomerang.
"Zuko," she asked. "What was it like growing up in a Fire Nation palace?
The firebender looked up and shrugged. "It was okay I guess…" They all stared at him until he understood that they expected more details. "Well, there were servants everywhere and the food was good. I was always exploring the palace. It was so big that by the time I left, there were still places I haven't been in."
"Why did you leave?" Suki inquired. Zuko looked very uncomfortable.
"I was… well… My father... ordered me to find the Avatar- I mean Aang." He seemed very fidgety. But they were getting somewhere, Katara wasn't going to stop now.
"But why?" Sokka asked, before Katara even opened her mouth. "Aang hadn't been seen for a hundred years. Why did Ozai send you to find someone that everyone thought was dead?"
Zuko shifted on the ground, obviously not happy with this discussion. "It was a punishment. When I was thirteen I spoke out of term at a war meeting, so I was banished and sent to capture the Avatar."
Toph let out a low whistle. "Wow, that's pretty harsh."
Zuko nodded. "He's not a very pleasant person."
"Understatement of the century," Suki snorted.
They still hadn't got to what they wanted to discuss. Zuko was doing his best to dodge their questions, but he didn't know that they had planned this. They weren't going to change the subject. Katara tried a different approach. "So what was it like growing up with Ozai and Azula as your family?"
"It wasn't bad at first. Azula was pretty normal until she started firebending." He replied quickly. Maybe he thought that they were done with the previous topic, but Katara knew that they were just warming up. "I didn't start until I was six, but she started lessons when she was five. Azula was a natural, and father started giving her private lessons after she mastered the basics. She was always a bit," Zuko paused as he thought of an appropriate word to describe his insane sister. "A bit odd back then, but after a while the lessons rubbed off on her I guess. That's when things got a little crazy between us."
"What did she do?" Aang asked. Katara raised an eyebrow at him. He already told her that he wasn't going to be a part of this conversation, but that was obviously thrown out of the window. His grey eyes were shining with curiosity. But they widened in horror with Zuko's answer.
"Well, that's when she started to try and kill me all the time."
Sokka choked on his food. Toph and Suki looked stunned. Aang stared at Zuko in disbelief while Katara gasped. Zuko looked amused.
"She would WHAT?" Sokka exclaimed, after he stopped coughing.
"Well, I don't think she actually meant to kill me," Zuko tried to reassure them. "It was more of a game for her. Anytime I was seriously hurt she would freak out."
"Right," said Sokka sardonically. "She was trying to kill you in a totally normal and joking way."
Zuko started to look a little embarrassed. He ran a hand through his hair, cheeks tinged a light pink. "I know it sounds weird, but I really don't think she meant it," he insisted.
Katara couldn't believe this. Azula would try and kill her brother? And how could you try to kill someone and not actually mean it? That didn't make any sense. Toph seemed to agree with her on this, and voiced their thoughts out loud.
Zuko played with his sharpening stone in his hands. "Since I was the oldest, I was automatically the heir to the throne. But Azula always thought that she deserved it more. Father was always comparing us and pushing us to compete. With me out of the way then she would be the heir. But I don't think she ever actually wanted me dead."
Aang looked beyond confused. "So what you're saying is that Azula would try to kill you, sometimes even seriously injuring you, but never actually meant any of it?" Zuko nodded.
"What would she do?" Suki asked, looking a little sickened.
Zuko looked way too casual for someone explaining how their sister constantly tried to kill him. "One time she pushed me into a pond when I was wearing ceremonial armor. I almost drowned, but she got a servant to help pull me back out. And another time she set my room on fire and locked the door when I was sleeping. My uncle broke down the door, but I inhaled a lot of smoke and couldn't stop coughing for weeks after that."
Aang made a squeaky noise. "Did she ever get punished for that?"
"Sometimes. She was always father's favorite and could get away with a lot of things. I think that father actually encouraged it. It's okay though, I got used to it."
Nobody knew what to say to that. Katara was stunned. What kind of sick person would encourage their children to try and kill each other? And how could Zuko possibly think that this was okay? That this was normal? Katara never thought of ways to kill her brother (okay, this was false. There were several times where she thought about killing her brother- but those were just thoughts. Not actual attempts. No matter how ridiculous her brother is, she would always love him). This discussion was already getting dark, and they hadn't even talked about the scars yet. She decided that this was the perfect time to ask. If Zuko was comfortable with talking about his sister's assassination attempts, he would surely be able to talk to them about his scars. Katara took a deep breath.
She was going to have to be blunt with this, so Zuko couldn't change the subject.
"What about Ozai? Did he ever hurt you?"
Zuko looked stunned. "W- What?"
Everyone turned to look at the very uncomfortable firebender. They were going to have to tread carefully from now on. Zuko tends to set things on fire or yell when he is under pressure, and they didn't want either of those things to happen.
"Did Ozai ever physically hurt you?" Sokka repeated. "Zuko, we all know that he must have done something to you."
"Zuko, it's okay, you can tell us." Katara said gently.
They have never seen Zuko like this. His eyes were wide and his knuckles were white from holding the sharpening stone so tightly. He looked utterly miserable and scared at the same time.
"I don't know what you're talking about," he said shakily.
"Yes you do," She prodded. "You have scars on your chest that you've been hiding from us" (Aang pointedly fiddled with his chopsticks to avoid Zuko's glare), "and you've never told us how you got the one on your face. You're part of our family now Zuko, and family tells each other everything."
Zuko didn't answer. Taking deep breaths, he avoided everyone's concerned gazes.
Suki tried to help. "Zuko. We want to help you, I'm sure you'll feel better if you tell us. We'll understand, we won't-"
"No! You won't understand!" Zuko snapped. "How could any of you understand? You all grew up with families that loved you, you never had to deal with knowing that your own father hated you!" He threw the sharpening stone down on the table. They were stunned into silence.
"I'm sure he didn't hate you," Aang said hesitantly, but this just made Zuko angrier.
He stood up and shouted furiously: "He didn't even try to hide it! I worked my ass off everyday, I trained until I couldn't move anymore, but nothing I did ever pleased him. He thinks I'm a pathetic failure, that I'm lucky to be born, and he would say it right to my face! How could that be misinterpreted? He wants me dead, he's tried to kill me twice already!"
The enraged firebender was breathing heavily and his fists were clenched. Katara felt horrible. He was right, they couldn't understand that. Even if their mom was dead, at least Sokka and her had a loving father. The only person who could relate a little bit to parent trouble was Toph, but it was an entirely different situation. Toph's parents loved her fiercely, they just didn't understand her. But none of them have a parent who was actively trying to kill them. And did Zuko say that his father already tried to kill him, twice?
"So he did hurt you. He gave you those scars." Toph said in a trembling voice.
"What- no that's not what I-" Zuko stammered.
Katara stood up and stepped towards Zuko. "It's okay. You're right, we don't understand. But we can still help you, Zuko. Ozai isn't your family anymore, we are. We're here to support you. But we can't help you if you lock your feelings inside. You can tell us."
Zuko was starting to edge towards the door now. Katara moved closer. She was so close, they were almost there.
"Zuko, did Ozai give you those scars?"
Something in Zuko's eyes shattered. His face flashed different emotions: rage, confusion, pain, loss, sadness. His hands were trembling. He stared at the floor to avoid her gaze. Katara glanced around at her friends. All of them were looking at the panicking firebender with concern.
Katara softly whispered his name, and Zuko's eyes met hers. She held her breath, and by the sounds of it, the rest of the Gaang were holding theirs too.
So when Zuko whispered that one word, it was heard by all as it traveled through the silent room.
"Yes."
Katara exhaled slowly as Zuko stared dejectedly at his feet. She started towards him, meaning to give him a much-needed hug, but the banished prince backed away from her.
"N-No, don't. Not now- I just-" And before anyone could say anything else, he fled the room.
xXx
Zuko ran. He was running from his friends, his fears, his past. But you can't run away from your memories. They are always there to haunt you when you lie in bed alone, night after night. Always there in your dreams where you can't escape them. He couldn't run from them, he's tried before.
"You're pathetic, the royal family doesn't show weaknesses."
Fighting back the tears, fighting against remembering- he stumbled onto the beach, collapsing on his hands and knees in the sand. This was the same beach where he would make sand castles with Azula and Lu Ten. The same beach where he would draw pictures in the sand with his mother. The same beach where he first realized that something was wrong with his family, with him.
"Embrace the pain, let it make you stronger."
He couldn't fight it anymore. The memories were swirling around, they were demanding to be noticed, to be remembered. He grit his teeth, grabbed fistfuls of sand, anything to distract him from them. But the memorie's demands were too strong, too recent to ignore. Zuko raised his hands to his face as he started to sob.
xXx
The room was filled with the sickly stench of burned flesh. His father grinned as he snapped his fiery whip against Zuko's back once again. He was holding back his tears, his screams. But it was so hard. Father said he was doing this to make him stronger. It's just a test, a test to prove himself. He repeated this in his mind, over and over again, trying to force himself to believe it. But the overwhelming pain did not agree with him, and a long groan escaped from his lips.
"You're pathetic." His father's voice was filled with contempt. "The royal family doesn't show weaknesses." Ozai lifted the whip again and cracked it down forcefully. The impact brought Zuko to his hands and knees. It tore through his skin while simultaneously cauterizing the wounds.
He heard screaming, and it took him awhile to realize that it was coming from him. His back was aching, pounding, pulsing in time with his erratic heartbeat. His chest felt tight, like the skin had shrunk. But the firewhips were far more painful than an open flame. The rest of his body numb, he was so tired and hot and cold all at the same time. It was a familiar feeling.
Three years ago. Three years since his father burned a mark of shame and dishonor on his face. Nothing would ever hurt more than that day. Not the pain- that hadn't changed. But the betrayal that ripped through his heart, that was what hurt the most. The knowledge that his father, his father did that to him, it was excruciating. But now Zuko knew what his father was capable of. He knew what to expect.
"Embrace the pain, let it make you stronger, Prince Zuko." Prince Zuko. That was all his father ever called him. He bit his tongue in a desperate attempt to stem his screams. He couldn't fail. He had to do this, to prove to his father that he was worthy. He had to pass this test. The Day of Black Sun was close, less than a month away. Father wanted to be sure that he was prepared, that he was truly a prince of the Fire Nation.
Or at least that's what Zuko kept telling himself.
Another crack. Zuko flinched as it made contact, but it wasn't as painful as the last ones were. Father was talking. But it was like he was under water- Zuko couldn't make out the words. His vision was getting blurry, he felt dizzy. His mind seemed to separate from his body, from the pain- it was all slowly ebbing away. His body jolted again as the whip struck for the thirteenth time (Zuko knew this for sure). But he couldn't feel it. He couldn't feel anything anymore. As he slumped onto the ground with one last moan, he thought he could hear something. But that was ridiculous- he hadn't heard that sound in years.
Ozai was laughing.
xXx
Zuko blinked. Tears were streaming down his face, and he hastily wiped them off. This was just embarrassing. He was crying on a beach for Agni's sake. If father saw this- he shuddered. He's never had a flashback when he was awake before. That was strange. But he did just confirm his friend's suspicions. Maybe that's what happens when you confess stuff like that?
Oh. He just told everyone. This was not good. Now they were going to do what the entire crew did back on his ship. They were going to be overly-nice to him, talk to him in hushed voices, cast him pitying glances. Zuko groaned. Just when he thought he found some friends who accepted him for who he was, this happened. They all knew. They were all going to treat him differently now. He really was pathetic.
Zuko had felt cornered back at dinner. He had a feeling that they planned this. How else would the conversation turn the way it did? They said that he was a part of their family, and that family told each other everything. Zuko didn't know how he felt about that. Maybe that was normal for them. But it was so foreign to Zuko's own experiences. After mom disappeared his views on the term family drastically changed.
You absolutely can not show weakness in front of your family. You cannot disobey your father, or there would be dire consequences. Be the best, conquer the weak. Show no mercy. Avoid Azula. Stay submissive, don't provoke or challenge them. Don't trust or, Agni forbid, love your family. And definitely do not talk about emotions with your family.
The idea telling his family about how he feels, about his weaknesses, was bizarre and terrifying to Zuko. But his friends were different. They never poked at his insecurities. They never were manipulative or hostile towards him after he joined them. They cared. They really cared about him, just like Uncle.
xXx
Nobody moved after Zuko left. They were all in shock. Katara felt numb. Now that she knows for sure, she doesn't know what to do. Zuko fled when she tried to comfort him. That hurt a little, but she understood why he did it. They just forced him to relive his own father abusing him, so of course he wouldn't want anybody touching him for a while. But Katara felt that he shouldn't be alone after what he had said.
Toph seemed to agree with her on this, because she stood up and said (very shakily, which worried Katara): "Let's go after him. He needs us right now." All of them followed her out the door.
They checked the house first, since none of them had seen which direction Zuko went after he left. The search spread outside after they didn't find him inside. Toph tried to use her earthbending to find him, but she couldn't detect his vibrations anywhere. This left them a little confused; but then Sokka declared that he must be on the beach, because Toph couldn't feel the vibrations as well on sand.
xXx
Zuko had been crying. There weren't any tears on his face, but his eyes gave it away ‒ shiny and red-rimmed. He was hugging his legs while his head rested on his knees. Katara knelt next to him while the rest of the Gaang gathered around, and hesitantly touched his shoulder. When he didn't react, she gathered him into a fierce hug. At first he stiffened, but then he slowly relaxed into her.
Katara felt tears prick her eyes. She blinked them back as Zuko pulled out of the hug and looked at them. He ducked his head, looking a little embarrassed, and muttered "Sorry I ran away like that."
"It's fine, Zuko, we understand," Sokka said firmly. "And we're sorry too. We shouldn't have forced you to tell us." He glanced at Katara as he said this, and she flushed. He was right. They really did force Zuko to tell them ‒ or at least she did. She got so carried away with trying to help him that she didn't stop when he refused to talk. Katara did that a lot, she would be so intent on helping someone that she wouldn't listen when they refused.
"No, it's okay." Zuko said. "It's just… I've never talked to anybody about… that before. Not even with Uncle."
Suki reached out and touched Zuko's shoulder reassuringly. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. We just wanted you to know that you're a part of our family now, and we're here for you."
"Yeah, you don't have to tell us if you don't want to, Sparky," Toph said softly.
"No- It's fine, guys. I'll tell you. It's just- I've never done it before. But you guys deserve to know. I've never had any friends before," he added. "So I guess I'm not used to, well… this." He used his hands to gesture at them, who were all in various states of cuddling in the sand.
"Are you sure?" Katara asked hesitatingly. "We're not forcing you to." She felt guilty about this whole situation. Making Zuko feel forced to confide in them was definitely not her goal. She just wanted him to know that they could help him.
He nodded and whispered: "Yeah, I'm sure." They huddled closer around him.
xXx
Is this what having a family is like? Cuddling on the beach? Talking about your feelings without worrying about the consequences? This whole situation was very odd for Zuko. He wanted to tell them, but there was still a part of him that expected something to happen afterwards.
They were all staring at him. But they didn't say anything, and for that Zuko was grateful. He just needed some time to collect his thoughts. He was scared. Scared of being vulnerable. Scared of being rejected. But they were his friends- they cared about him. He had to tell them, but Zuko didn't even know where to begin. How could he even start to tell them? How could he explain what it was like when his father hurt him? He couldn't think of a way, so he decided to start with the war meeting.
xXx
Zuko had been silent for a while, but none of the Gaang said anything. He looked a little confused, like he couldn't quite believe that they wanted to know. Katara grabbed his hand and squeezed it reassuringly. Okay, she was already hugging him and practically on his lap, but she felt like he needed this- maybe she needed it a little too. What he was about to do was going to be very hard for him, and she wanted to be supportive. So that naturally meant lots of cuddles and hand-holding. Zuko didn't seem to notice this, however. He looked a little grim as he took a deep breath and started to talk.
"My father… well you could say that he never… approved of me. So I was always looking for ways to impress him. When I was thirteen there was this war meeting. I thought that if I couldn't be as good as Azula in firebending, then I could at least be a great general. So I convinced my Uncle to let me in a war meeting.
"Uncle told me not to speak during the meeting, and I agreed. But I ended up speaking anyway. There was this horrible plan that a general presented. He suggested sending a regiment of new recruits to distract an experienced Earth Kingdom army while another regiment came in from behind. The general knew that the new recruits would be slaughtered, but he wanted to go through with the plan anyway. I thought that the new recruits didn't deserve that, and I protested against the plan.
"My father was furious. I had disrespected the general by interrupting him, so he ordered me to fight an Agni Kai. The general was old and I knew that I could take him, but when I faced my opponent in the courtyard, the general wasn't there." Zuko closed his eyes for a moment and took a shaky breath.
"What's an Agni Kai?" Asked Toph in a small voice.
"A fire duel," Aang whispered, looking at Zuko with wide eyes. Zuko nodded.
Katara thought that she knew where this was going, and was dreading what he would say next.
"By speaking out in the war chamber, I hadn't only disrespected the general, but my father as well. So it was my father I had to fight. I hadn't meant to disrespect him, so I knelt down and told him that I was his loyal son and I wouldn't fight him. He ordered me to rise and fight, but I refused." Shaking his head, Zuko sighed. "It's treason to attack the Fire Lord. I was going to be punished either way. I remember pleading with him, asking for mercy, but instead he lit my face on fire."
Zuko clenched his hands into fists and stared at the ground, blinking hard in a desperate attempt to hold back tears. Katara felt sick to her stomach. She had no idea- how could anybody do that to a child? Their own child? She felt a small hand creep into her own, and she was very surprised to see that it's owner was Toph. The little earthbender's eyes were wide and sad. Aang looked like he was in shock. His face was pale, and he had somehow wriggled in between Sokka and Suki during the story, who didn't seem to notice. They were holding hands and staring at Zuko in a stunned silence. But Zuko continued talking before they could think of something to say.
"And the next thing I knew, I was in the infirmary. I was only there for an hour, but my father had already sent me a note telling me that I was banished. I had lost my honor when I refused to fight. The only way I could get it back was to capture the Avatar. He sent me off on a ship the next day. I spent three years looking, and that's when I found you guys at the South Pole." A guilty look passed over Zuko's face. "I know that I was a brat back then, but I really just wanted to get home. I didn't care about the war. That's why I… did what I did in Ba Sing Se. I was homesick for three years, and I finally had the opportunity to go home." He looked apologetically at Katara as he said this.
"When I finally got back to the palace, it seemed so different to me. Now I know that I was the one who changed. I had seen what the Fire Nation did to the other nations, and I couldn't get that out of my mind. The only thing that was still the same was Azula and Ozai. Even though I helped defeat the Avatar, or they thought I did, they still hated me. They didn't trust me either. That's when father started these… tests. He thought I was too weak, so he would… test my pain tolerance."
Katara felt tears drip down her face. Ozai sickened her. He was a horrible, despicable man. She grabbed Zuko's hand again, but she wasn't sure if it was to reassure him or herself.
"At first he would just use fire. He would tell me not to show any signs of weaknesses and then… burn me. If I made any noise then he would make the flames hotter. After that he would use fire whips." Zuko let out a low, humorless chuckle. "He told me it was to make me stronger, but I think it was more of a game to him."
Zuko paused again, but by the look on his face he wasn't going to continue. His eyes were closed, and his face looked pale and drained.
xXx
Relief. That was the feeling washing over him. He felt lighter, almost, like he was carrying that baggage on his back for three years, and now it was a lighter. It was a strange feeling.
Exhaustion. He was so tired. If he didn't get up soon he would fall asleep for sure. His eyes watered. Why was crying so tiring?
xXx
"Hey," Sokka exclaimed unexpectedly. "Aang, when did you get here?" Startled, everybody looked at the indignant Sokka and the sheepish Avatar, who was practically in Sokka's lap at the moment. Leave it to her brother to provide comic relief to break the tension. It also gave Zuko a moment to collect himself while the others were distracted. She felt a flash of concern for him.
The firebender hastily wiped away a rogue tear while the others watched Sokka dramatically shove Aang off his lap. She held her breath as he turned to look at her. Their eyes met, and smiled reassuringly at him. There really wasn't anything else she could say. They could insult and denounce Ozai until they were blue in the face, but that wasn't what Zuko needed right now. He needs them to be there for him.
Their little moment was ruined by Toph; who, to everybody's surprise, tackled Zuko to the ground and sat on his chest. Toph had tears in her eyes. Katara knew that Zuko and her had become close- it must have hurt her a lot to hear what Zuko's own family did to him.
"Listen to me, Zuko," Toph yelled, poking Zuko in the chest. "Ozai is a frickin bastard who doesn't deserve to be related to you. In fact, as far as I'm concerned he isn't related to you at all. You're a part of our family now."
"Thanks, Toph." Zuko looked a little baffled at this situation- like he's never been tackled, sat on, and yelled at by a tiny blind earthbender before. He grinned and ruffled Toph's hair. Toph stayed in his lap when he sat up. (Katara had to contain the "awww" that was trying to come out).
Suki reached out and clasped Zuko's shoulder. "Are you okay?"
Zuko nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine."
"So… You're not mad at us for… bringing it up?" Katara asked.
"No, no, guys it's okay. I probably should have told you anyway, but... I guess you guys already know that I'm not used to this sort of stuff. So, thanks for… you know, listening."
"We're here for you, Zuko. But be a pal next time and just tell us so we don't have to force it out of you," Sokka joked. Zuko nodded again, but this time he was smiling.
It was starting to get late. Aang had dozed off on Sokka's lap ("How did he get on my lap again?!) and Toph yawned widely. Katara decided that this unplanned beach party was over. "Alright!" She exclaimed, startling Aang awake. "It's way past Toph and Aang's bed time. Let's head back."
So they trudged back to the house (Sokka had to carry Aang back because he fell asleep again).
xXx
"Please father, I meant you no disrespect. I am your loyal son."
Zuko couldn't believe it. He was kneeling again, kneeling on the ground in front of him. No- He was feeling better! He had talked to his friends, his new family- was that not enough to keep these nightmares away? His father loomed above him, nothing but a dark silhouette- a monster. He knew what was coming, but he couldn't do anything about it. No, not again, please, I can't do this again!
"Rise and fight, Prince Zuko." No, he couldn't- not against his Fire Lord, his father. He couldn't fight his family-
"You will learn respect, and suffering will be your teacher." His fist was blazing with fire, hot white flames. Zuko couldn't move, he was paralyzed with fear, he knew what was coming, he couldn't stop it- no! Father, please-
xXx
Katara woke up suddenly. She was sure that she heard something, somebody in her sleep. She slid out of bed and padded across the room. Opening the door, Katara listened carefully. Nothing. That was odd. She thought she had heard somethi- There! It sounded like a groan.
Katara tiptoed into the hallway, keeping alert for any more noises. There it was again- coming from the room across from her. It was Zuko's room. She quickly crossed the hallway and knocked his door lightly. "Zuko? Are you okay?"
He didn't answer. Katara pressed her ear against the door and heard another moan coming from inside. Very carefully easing the door open, she peered inside. It was very dark, but she could see the outline of Zuko on his bed. He was asleep. She moved to close the door when she heard him whimper: "No! Father, please!"
Zuko started to thrash around on the bed. Katara rushed into the room and was at his side in seconds. She tried shaking him awake, but that seemed to make it worse. Zuko jerked away from her and cried out wildly. Not knowing what else to do, Katara eased herself gently onto the bed and rubbed soothing circles on Zuko's back. When he calmed down Katara laid down beside him and grabbed his hand. She started to murmur encouraging words, things you would normally say to comfort somebody. "Shhh, it's okay. You're going to be fine, I'm here. Everything is okay."
Katara knew what he was dreaming about. He was with that bastard (as Toph had said), and she was determined to help him.
"Zuko, he's not your father, he never was."
xXx
It was coming- his father's fist, lit like a torch, was arching down. Time slowed. Zuko couldn't close his eyes, he was forced to watch as it inched towards his face. And just as he braced himself for the excruciating pain that he knew so well, it stopped.
His father had frozen in time, as still as a statue. Everything was bathed in a soft blue light. Zuko could hear a voice, a beautiful, soothing voice. It flowed through the room like water, and although he couldn't understand what she was saying, he felt at peace. He could listen to that voice for the rest of eternity and be content.
Water. Rushing water. It surged into the room and parted around Zuko, surrounding his father. Encasing him in a block of ice. Suddenly, Katara's voice rose above the sound of the roaring water.
"He's not your father, he never was."
His father- no, Ozai- exploded.
xXx
Katara felt Zuko's entire body relax with a sigh. She smiled. Reaching over, she brushed his bangs out of his face. Her hand hovered over his scar. She hesitated for a moment before very gently stroked his left cheek. The scar was rough and warm under her fingers. He was a child when that monster did this to him. And even when the wound had healed, Zuko was still haunted by it. Katara knew that Zuko couldn't stop the nightmares, but she could. She would do it every night if she had to. He didn't deserve this.
There was a creaking noise behind her, and she whirled around to see Sokka, Suki, Toph, and Aang enter the room. They wordlessly climbed into the bed with her and Zuko. Toph settled herself next to Zuko, wrapping her arms around him. Aang snuggled close to Katara, falling asleep instantly. Sokka and Suki squeezed onto the end of the bed. They were a big tangle of limbs and blankets. The bed was clearly not made for six people, and it was uncomfortably warm, but they weren't going anywhere.
Surrounded by his new family, Zuko slept peacefully for the first time in three years.
xXx
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