"Welcome to another chapter of this fic where we try as hard as we can to crush the naruto cliches, wether fanmade or canonical! With different degrees of success."

Illusion exclaims smiling at the readers who have too much free time and nothing to do in their lives better than watching this page.

And yes I'm being more sassy and sarcastic, deal with it.

"And again, possible OOCness, 4th wall break, and the usual warnings apply. And does anybody have a problem using images in this site? This story's image is being problematic currently and can't work for some reason (maybe because it's 'inappropriate'?), so I'll just put a link to the picture later in the profile. Now let's start!"

the "'KiLl mE' oRaNgE" "not-ninja-like" outfit

"No! I'll tell you again. That's not a good outfit for ninjas to wear!"

"Yes it is! BELIEVE IT!"

Kurenai rubbed her forehead in frustration, looking in annoyance at her student Naruto.

(the cliche naru-hina-shino combination happened in this omake, because naruto will probably ignore kurenai's opinion about HIS fashion if she wasn't at least a friend to him, duh!)

Naruto glared at her, his hands hugging his apparently not ninja-like clothes as if they will vanish if he didn't.

"Naruto! Ninja require stealth!"

"Oh yeah!?"

Naruto and Kurenai kept looking at each other while the third and fourth wheels that are hinata and shino got completely forgotten.

"Fine! I'll change it! but I warn you, you won't like it!"

He quickly left after the training in a furious and vengeful mode.

Kurenai huffed, hoping that her student would now change that abomination of an outfit to something better and more suited.

Unfortunately...

"Naruto, what the hell are you wearing?"

Kurenai askeded incredulously, her eyes (along with hinata's) glued to the sight of what her student was wearing.

Somehow, Naruto managed in one day to find a goddamn ANBU outfit, he wore black t-shirt, black pants, and black trench coat, along with... wait, how did he get black steel-toed boots?! Those weren't a public piece of clothings!

"MY NEW CLOTHES OF COURSE!"

The fact he was a blond, and very excited, and his loud voice didn't make him look like an edgelord at least, but it made the contrast between his ridiculously edgy outfit and his childish and gentle nature all the more clear and disturbing.

'Oh Kami (they're japanese, so use Kami, I guess?), his new look looks not only worse but more out of place!' Kurenai thought with a little horror.

Hinata blushed at seeing her crush in a different outfit while Shino's expression was unreadable due to his outfit.

"Uh, don't you think you overdid it in stealth?" Kurenai asked with hesitation.

"Of course not! I need to take being stealthy seriously so black is the best of course!" Okay, she definitely heard the sarcasm in his tone here, and it's pretty clear he is being petty on purpose to her.

Damn, what did she do?! Not only did she end up being a target for her prankster of a student, but she can't tell him to stop now because some of the better ninja she saw wear clothes like that in public!

She sighed.

"Just, let's just train."

Naruto's innocent smile had her nearly groan.

She can only hope he stops this prank soon.

Unfortunately, the training session for some reason felt way longer than it for Kurenai, who was trying to not think of the situation she unknowingly caused.

Naruto's smirk was not helping.

After the session, Naruto returned to his apartment proud of his prank.

He was very annoyed at her yesterday when she told him that his clothes are 'not stealthy'.

He understood her idea, but it was dumb for her to think that she has the authority to tell him what to wear, especially when she wears what looks like a freaking bondage, those two Taijutsu weirdoes wear green spandex with orange leg warmers (yeah I know it's a jumpsuit actually but meh), most of his classmates wear ridiculous outfits such as sakura's red/pink outfit, Ino who looks like she is in a party, and even shino who looked like a sleeping bag.

'Now, what should I wear tomorrow to make the lesson stick?'

Needless to say, after a week of ridiculous 'stealthy' outfits Kurenai never bothered telling him what to wear unless it's needed for missions or if his clothes were borderline improper to wear in front of others.

"Geez, and people think Naruto will like a black edgy outfit." Illusion states in a monotone voice while munching on some popcorn she probably brought from her breastspace, because she is a cliche self-insert of the author.

"Look, people, maybe it's fine for him to wear black, but not to the degree he becomes edgy, and no, his "'kill me' orange" outfit is quite practical when needing to not appear threatening, helps him hide among the population. Not to mention, half the cast are looking like they are going to a house party more than going to kill/sabotage, etc..."

She was now drinking some cola.

"And if you still think orange isn't a cool color, I should remind you that Naruto's SOSP/KCM say "screw the coolness I have Ultimate Power!" so get it, naruto doesn't have to be cool to be strong. Anyways, what's next?"

Paperwork

Naruto was, once again, in the hokage's office after another D-rank mission that they somehow failed.

Naruto looked at the huge amount of paperwork intensely, and in what he thought a brilliant idea.

"Hey, jiji, why don't you just make a shadow clone to deal with paperwork?"

Hiruzen looked at him and rolled his eyes.

"Naruto, that idea," Naruto beamed, thinking of the briliant idea he proposed.

"is stupid and pointless. But I appreciate you trying to help."

Naruto blinked, not understanding what he said, and then he looked baffled.

"Naruto," Hiruzen sighed "I am not stupid, I tried it before, and my clones also didn't like dealing with paperwork and dispelled themselves or injured themselves enough to dispel. If it worked, then I would have been using it already."

"Oh."

Naruto said lamely.

In hindsight, he should have thought that if he can think of that, then the hokage can.

"Hmm, Hiruzen here knows how dumb the idea of shadow clones dealing with paperwork really is. Geez, maybe the fandom really underestimates the genius of the "professor" or think that a clone that is essentially you will enjoy sitting for hours reading papers while even a papercut can dispel them?"

Illusion looked boredly at the audience.

Female Kyubi

Naruto, the 5-years old kyubi jinchuriki awoke and looked at where he is now after getting beaten by a bunch of civilains and him begging for them to stop, because having supernatural powers is useless against a mob apparently.

He can't understand exactly where he is, but he can see that he is probably locked in some weird place. There is water on the ground and he is very confused and scared.

'Where am I?'

He asked no one as he started to walk on the path with no plan at all.

It was after what felt like hours that he started to hear something.

A faint sound of what seemed to be, a sob?

He didn't understand it clearly but he went to check it out.

After looking around for a few minutes, he stood in front of what looked to be some gate with bars, and beyond it, the sobs that he heard earlier became stronger, and he saw a figure behind it.

The figure was a female who was obviously crying because, well, he doesn't know.

But apparently, being tormented makes you a big softie instead of a distrustful and a loner person, he naturally went toward the crying girl behind the bars to comfort her.

He entered between the bars, and the last thing he had recognized was the girl's form that turned red and seemingly exploded into energy, obliterating him.

A few seconds later, the kyubi looked around it after killing that pesky host, seeing the gate disappearing.

It chuckled.

"Hm, it seems females look more sympathetic then men? You'd think that in a world of killers such notions will be thrown away. Well, time to get out of this body."

And it went to exit the dying body and to revive once more in the physical world.

A day later, the village was completely massacred.

And then, Kurama transformed into a human-like form and decided to hide for a few years in the oceans since he doesn't need food or air to live, being a chakra entity and all that.

And since the Akatsuki couldn't find the kyubi, the organisation fell apart on it's own after long years of fruitless waiting.

"Female or not, kurama is still a thousands of years old demon(or nigh-immortal being). If you think that just because kurama has a pair of tits, she is gentle, you better not bash sakura in your fics. Equality people."

Santa claus Kyubi

"What do you want, brat?"

Kurama looked down at the nuisance that dared to interrupt his nap.

Some guy called Madaka or something.

Not that he cared so much.

Kurama's eyes, red with rings and tomoes looked at the pest who smugly smirked at him.

One second later, the guy was set on black fire, and quickly Kurama smashed his arm on him.

What remained was a puddle of blood.

It also burned, until nothing remained.

Kurama then yawned and returned to sleep.

"Oh god, how can't people see this." Illusion muttered as she looked disappointed. "If kurama can modify the body of others to give them bloodlines, he might as well change his own body and be done with it."

"Now, nex-" Illusion's voice was cut and she blinked.

"Well, guys, it seems that unfortunately, our time is over for now."

She shrugged.

"Apparently the author wanted to make multiple cliches in the same chapter, but sadly, due to time and other problems, they decided that it's too tiring to write multiple cliches at once in the very same chapter."

She looked at you.

"So while this story will live on, like the rest of the stories (although the updates will most likely be irregular), we will only focus on one cliche/trope at a time."

And with that, she bowed.

You can now enjoy the quick sight of her not naked breasts as she bows, readers.

"Hope you will be understanding, and goodbye for now."

And with a smile, the world turns black.