Oahu, Hawaii

Listening to the sound of water lapping against the side of the boat, the lightly creaking wooden deck, and the gentle flapping of sails as Bobby rubbed tanning oil on her back, Pam let out a contented sigh and murmured, "can we stay like this forever?"

Brushing her hair to one side with the back of his hand, he leaned down and kissed her cheek, whispering in her ear, "sure, that could be arranged".

"I wish. I've never been happier or more relaxed than I am right now", turning and lifting her head slightly, she raised her sunglasses to look at him, telling him exactly how she felt. She'd lived a long life, full of ups and downs, but never more pleasant than their time together recently. Besides being struck down by a mystery illness in the middle of their vacation, one she'd self-diagnosed as heat exhaustion and recovered reasonably quickly from, the honeymoon experience had been a dream come true thus far and she wasn't looking forward to returning to Dallas and real life anytime soon. Right now, long, lingering mornings in bed followed by long, relaxing days in the tropical sun were their reality and she loved it.

"So, being Mrs Ewing isn't so bad after all?" smirking, Bobby had her there, she couldn't see herself relying solely her husband's wealth to breeze through life forever, it wasn't who she was, however, when she did give in and let herself enjoy what he could provide them, it was far from a bad experience. She'd dated men of means before but Bobby was the first man who'd completely swept her off her feet and she could see herself relaxing her personal boundaries when it came to letting him indulge her. Their honeymoon was a first class experience and the extravagance only served to add to how perfect it was.

"I never said it was", defending herself, she couldn't help but smile back at him; it was easier to admit to herself now that she'd been a little premature in casting judgement on her new life. She still had no real desire to give up everything she knew to sit around Southfork all day waiting for him to come home, however, spending her days like they had been, enjoying the fun and intimacy of their new marriage, that she could get used to.

"No, just that it wasn't enough", reminding her of their previous discussions, Bobby seemed more serious this time. She knew he wanted her to consider being his wife and the mother of their future children on a tier above her other priorities, but she couldn't do that; she wasn't solely his wife and while someday she planned to have children, as far as her plans went, it wasn't in her immediate future. She loved him and she loved being his wife, but she was more than that, she was her own person too.

Turning over and sitting up, she matched Bobby's tone in her response, "it's not, I'm not Sue Ellen. As much as I absolutely love this and right now I wish we didn't have to leave tomorrow, I know I'd eventually be looking for something else to do all day, and so would you". Answering him, she caught herself and frowned, just a moment ago she had been considering how nice it would be living the way they had been for the last little while, like a vacation, but he was making her think, think about real life and she didn't like it.

"I don't know, me, you, sun, sand, surf one day, exploring the rainforest the next, island hopping for a few weeks, then on to another destination. We could explore the world", turning their serious discussion into one of fantasy, she didn't understand him; she would have loved to have had him say that exact comment a few moments ago, but now he had her thinking.

"I'd love that, in an ideal world, but we don't live in an ideal world, we have to go home sometime", arguing the opposite point, she couldn't believe herself; why she couldn't have just gone along with the imaginary, wonderful future, free from day-to-day drudgery, she didn't know, but she hadn't and now they were continuing a serious discussion.

"We'd visit", optimistic, Bobby seemed confident that it could work and she wished she felt the same way. A lifetime vacation sounded wonderful, but she found it hard to believe it was a real possibility.

"Yeah, and our visits would get longer and longer when life got in the way, then one day you'd find yourself back working for Ewing Oil, I'd be stuck diffusing a family crisis and Hawaii is just a distant memory", countering his comments again, she hated that she felt the need to say something. They were supposed to be having fun, not arguing.

"Don't be so negative. Our lives will be great, you'll see", taking her hand, squeezing it gently, Bobby did his best to change her perspective, which she appreciated considering she didn't want to seem like a pessimist but somehow that minor trait was getting the better of her.

"Our lives are pretty great now", reminding him that she wasn't all doom and gloom she smiled and squeezed his hand. If they could stay on their honeymoon forever then she would elect to do that, but it was just an imaginary concept, not a real option.

"Tell me again why we're going back then?" clearly joking, Bobby smirked as he questioned her insistence that they couldn't have everything they wanted, especially since she'd admitted she wanted what he wanted, she was just more of a realist about it actually happening.

"You know why, we have to. I don't want to, but we have to. I want us, but so does everyone back in Dallas", thinking mostly of her daddy and Cliff, it suddenly occurred to her that they had different priorities and therefore different perspectives on returning home. Bobby was family oriented, but he wasn't a caretaker, he did as his parents wished because it was respectful, not because their lives would crumble without him, whereas although her daddy wasn't talking to her right now and Cliff was a grown man, she felt responsible for making sure they were ok and that meant being present in their lives.

"I know, I know. I hope you'll remember that you want us when we're back home", unaware of her concerns, Bobby focused on the other part of what she'd said, making sure their relationship was a priority.

"I will. I have no intention of forgetting about you, or us", meaning exactly what she said, she knew it would be difficult when they returned home but she was confident they could and would make it. He had a new job, she planned to get a new job, they both had friends and family, and at some point they were going to have to deal with his grad school acceptance, but they had each other and she hoped they could maintain a focus on the good of their relationship when making decisions about everything else.

"Good, I'll hold you to that", kissing their joined hands, Bobby's smile charmed her; they didn't always agree on everything, but he was handsome and caring and she loved him.

"I expect you will", returning his smile she answered him jokingly, though Bobby didn't seem to take her comments that way.

"I want you to be happy too", appearing concerned, his sympathetic expression was just as attractive to her as his charming smile, though if given the option she'd much rather see him smiling.

"I am happy", touching his face, she held eye contact, willing him to see she was telling him the truth. She'd expressed earlier how wonderful and relaxed she felt and somewhere along the way things had turned serious in their discussion, however, she was still just as happy with him and that wasn't going to change if she had any say in the situation.

"I'm glad, so am I", visibly reassured by her comments, Bobby smiled and mirrored her hand movement, touching her face gently before leaning forward and closing the gap between them.

Welcoming his kiss, she was reminded of the obvious; she was highly attracted to and in love with her husband and it would take a lot more than work and family to make her forget about everything they had together. Their honeymoon was probably the most consistent time alone they'd have together for a while, but when it inevitably ended it didn't mean their relationship had to suffer; they were more and had more than their finite time in Hawaii.

To be continued…