[that damn southern hospitality]

You make me a jumbled mess.

You have the prettiest smile.

I like how quick you are to laugh and smile.

I like you.

I've liked you for a while.

Jasper said all these things to her. Did he mean it? He seemed like he meant it, so maybe he did. He was earnest. He looked truthful. He held her fabric - insisted on it, really - and hadn't let her leave until he was sure she understood his sincerity.

But can she trust what he said? Alice wants to, because she desperately likes this boy, but he's also proven himself to be the fickle sort. A fickle sort that fixates, too.

Is he only just fixating on Alice now? Will someone better come along later? Maybe. But then, isn't that also the gamble with all love? The real question is whether she will gamble for him. Granny would call it a fool's bet.

Maybe Alice is just a fool. She's certainly proven herself to be one lately. She hopes she's grown from that, gotten a little wiser and wilier.

Jasper
I have a triple shot
And a surprise for you

Alice
Where are you?

Jasper
Outside

Alice puts aside the skirt she's working on, mindful of the pins keeping the hemline straight, and knee-walks to the window in her room. Sure enough, she can peer down and see Jasper Whitlock standing in front of Roble Hall, coffee in one hand and...something large in a box at his feet. She can't quite see him clearly from here, but she does admire the way he sunlight plays in his hair and the way his tall, lean frame cuts a neat figure in the foliage around him, which is already starting to turn to the warm hues of autumn.

"Where are you going?" Rose asks when Alice passes through the common room. Two weeks into the semester and Rose's desk is already a mess of notebooks and textbooks, her scientific calculator in one hand and no less than three wooden pencils shoved into the bun in her hair. Rose is absorbed enough in her studying that she doesn't even look up.

Alice vaguely wonders where Bella and Leah are, and then recalls the time. Mid-afternoon means classes for both of them. Maybe that's a good thing. While things with Bella have slotted seamlessly into place - largely due to Bella's nature, she knows - things with Leah haven't quite returned to normal. There seems to be - or maybe it only just feels like there is - a faint sort of leeriness about Leah. Overall, Leah treats her as usual, always a little mean because that's just the way she is, but then there are times when Alice can sense the way Leah watches her. Alice doesn't know what Leah is searching for or what she sees, but she does know that Leah has a particular way of viewing the world, almost always in the role of spectator or commentator. Leah surely has an opinion about all of this, but she keeps mum about it overall.

Still, Alice can just imagine what Bella or Leah would say if they were here. Probably something similar to what Rose thinks, honestly…

"Jasper is downstairs," Alice answers, slipping her feet into the nearest shoes. She's pretty sure they aren't hers, but it hardly matters, not for a quick trip outside and back.

Alice hadn't spoken very loudly, but Rose's head snaps up anyway. Rose looks at her with that shrewd gaze of hers, the one that sees through all the nonsense and cuts right to the bottom line, the quick of an issue, the common denominator. Rose's blue eyes are cold when she says, "Oh, that asshole. What does he want?"

Alice presses her lips together. "He says he has a surprise," Alice says. And coffee, she doesn't add. Jasper seems to think that Alice needs a constant supply of coffee. He isn't wrong. She thinks it's sweet, if not a little misguided.

Does he...only think she'll see him if she can get something out of it? She hopes not, but it does seem that way, doesn't it?

She thinks, not for the first time, the Jasper seems a little green in the world, hardly aware of his own feelings and not seeming to recognize others. She had thought, before, that it was simply because he's a little young. But now, there seems to be something awfully sheltered about him. He has a clumsy temperament, one she hopes he'll grow out of. That's what he's trying to do, she thinks. It's just unfortunate that she has to be part of his growing pains.

Rose clicks her tongue. "Is his surprise going to be that he's not a going to be an asshole anymore? Because that's the only acceptable surprise."

"Rose."

"Am I wrong?"

"Yes," Alice says emphatically. "At least give him the benefit of the doubt."

Rose arches a brow. "Is that what you're doing? How's that working out?"

Alice sighs. "Don't be so negative."

"Don't be so naïve."

"I'm not," Alice insists. She doesn't think second chances are naïve. She thinks second chances are something that everyone deserves because everyone makes mistakes and everyone deserves the chance to make up for them, however they can.

She thinks Bella is the only one who understands this.

"That damn Southern hospitality..." Rose shakes her head, turning back to her desk.

Yeah, Alice laments. That damn Southern hospitality, indeed.

Alice goes downstairs, floating between hope and confusion and anticipation. She squeezes against a wall when a few coeds pass her on the way down, shooting them strained smiles. She tries to temper her expectations because expecting things out of people only leads to heartache, but she has trouble doing it.

Maybe Jasper is destined to give her heartache, like a test. Maybe Rose is right and Alice should have a smaller heart. Maybe Bella is right and Alice is just giving part of herself away because she's too tender, too timid. Maybe Leah was right and Alice needs to be watched to ward off further mistakes. Maybe Alice should leave right now and not look back and forget about Jasper altogether.

But then she gets downstairs and the cool crisp of the fall greets her and Jasper is standing there, toeing his foot on the ground and licking his lips.

He looks nervous. Alice tries to take that as a good sign.

"Jasper…"

He lights up when he sees her. There's no other way to describe it. "Alice!" he says with feeling. "Ah, here, your coffee. I hope it's still hot."

It is still hot, a pleasant warmth in her palms. "Thank you," she says softly, taking a careful sip. It's strong and sweet, a generous layer of whip cream on top.

Jasper looks down, quietly pleased.

Alice looks down too, rooting through a fissure of awkwardness, her eyes landing on the large box. There is plastic over the top as the contents are too misshapen for the box to close. Jasper said this was for her, didn't he? Her curiosity peaks. "What is this?"

Jasper laughs, rubbing at the back of his neck. "It's…silly. It was impulsive, but when I saw it…"

Alice crouches down and lifts the thick plastic off the top. She almost drops the coffee at the sight of what is inside.

Now, Alice is a lover of fashion, and any decent aficionado knows the history of fashion, right back to the start. Alice has a particular affection for sewing machines, so she knows immediately that what is inside the box is a true antique. Even separated into pieces, the ironwork, the elegantly shaped pedal, the size of the bobbin, and the hand-painted flowers on the lacquered pale blue surface are dead ringers for a genuine sewing machine from the early 1900s.

"Where did you get this?" she breathes, turning wide, round eyes up to Jasper.

"Oh." Jasper goes pink in the cheeks. "I was at this antique store and I saw it and thought of you," he says simply.

Alice blinks, trying to slot all this information together. The one thing her mind focuses on is the idea of Jasper Whitlock at an antique store.

"It's a hobby," he says to her silent question.

It's an interesting hobby for a nineteen-year-old boy, but then again, he is studying history isn't he? Anthropology? Alice can hardly judge. She spends a huge chunk of time every week searching for deals and inspiration online. She even runs a fashion blog to answer fashion-related questions. Alice's hobby is more of a lifestyle, whereas Jasper…

Belatedly, it occurs to her that antiques are expensive. She should know. Half of Granny's things have been appraised for value and the Brandons have a modest collection of heirloom pieces that, if sold, would net a pretty penny. Not that any of them would even think of selling parts of their family history. But still - this antique sewing machine is surely more than Jasper can afford, right?

"Jasper, you bought this…for me? I can't accept this," she tells him, shaking her head and standing from her crouch. "It must have been so expensive"

Jasper coughs. "It's nothing. The ranch is doing well…and you're worth it," he adds shyly.

Warmth spreads through Alice, a pleasant feeling accompanied by an urge to smile. She tramps it down, just barely. "Really, I can't. It's too much," Alice says firmly, trying to draw a line because she has to, for the sake of her own heart. If she gives in now, then surely that's sending a message, right?

She doesn't want Jasper to misunderstand.

She doesn't want to misunderstand.

Jasper appears crestfallen. "Ah. I see…" He looks down at the box, nudging the glasses on his nose, his mouth the tiniest bit downturned. "It's fine. I'll just store it, then," he decides haltingly.

"Okay."

"Yeah."

Alice tucks the coffee closer to her chest, the wind rustling a few leaves off the trees. She feels decidedly awkward, knowing that she has obviously disappointed him but not sure what she can do…It's not like she can actually accept such an expensive gift, right? It really is too much. "Well, then…if that's all…" she trails off.

Jasper jerks his head around. "It is!" he says abruptly, then winces. "It's - you can go back to whatever you were doing before I bothered you."

Before he bothered her. He keeps saying things like this, as if his company is a burden to her. It's not. Not really. He makes her uncertain and confused, but she's never bothered by his presence. She's…not exactly comforted by it, either, though and maybe that matters more than possibly hurting his feelings. She isn't sure, anymore. She isn't sure about a lot of things.

"Alright," she says after a beat, taking a step back. "I'll, uh, see you later then. Thank you. For the coffee."

"Okay, yeah. Great!" Jasper returns. "You're welcome. Um. Anytime. For the coffee, I mean."

Why is it so awkward? Alice thinks as she turns away. She doesn't want it to be awkward, but she doesn't know how to fix it, either. She does know - or she thinks, maybe - that she wants to fix it, because Jasper is, for all his flaws, still fundamentally a good person. Or he could be. He can be so heart-wrenchingly sweet, like now, buying an antique sewing machine for her out of the blue, simply because he saw it and she was on his mind. For all he'd done in his ill-fated pursuit of Bella, Alice knows that Jasper had never been so…like this.

He's trying so hard. Every day, every time they talk or cross paths, Alice can only think about how hard he's trying. Because he likes her. Because he thinks she's worth the effort of earning her forgiveness. Because…he must be sincere about it all. There's no other explanation. What kind of man continually sets himself up for rejection? He's letting her decide everything, and in doing that, he's giving Alice time - but is time what she needs?

Maybe she needs to be bold, instead.

Alice only gets a few steps away before she's turning around, the guilt of being the cause for that crestfallen expression on his face getting to her. Granny always said it's the thought that counts - and Alice can recognize how much thought Jasper is putting into all of this.

It's the final push she needs.

"You could ship it!" she calls back.

Jasper's attention darts back to her, away from the box he was frowning at. He furrows his brows. "Wha - ship it?"

"To Mississippi," Alice clarifies, clutching the coffee to hide her hand-shaking nerves.

"You want me to…send it to your home in Mississippi?" he checks hesitantly.

"Yes," she answers plainly. She steels her resolve. "I…it's too large for the dorm room and I already have a machine here. But I don't have one in Mississippi. So. You could ship it there."

It takes a moment for her acceptance to sink in, and then Jasper smiles broadly, dipping his head like an old gentleman. "Yes, ma'am. I'll ship it right away, then."

Alice smiles too and walks away and hopes she isn't making a mistake.

It doesn't feel like a mistake. But Alice has been wrong before. Maybe this time she's right.

Jasper
Here's the tracking information

Alice
Okay
I'll let Granny know
Thank you

Jasper
You're welcome

Alice
I'll talk to you later then

Jasper
I'll be around

And the thing is, Alice is starting to believe Jasper when he says he'll be around. He meets her the next morning with a fresh cup of coffee and insists on walking her to her class clear across campus, even though it means he has to book it to be on time to his own class. But he's there, waiting for her outside when her class is over, his cheeks red from the chilled air and his hair askew, still panting. He asks about studying together in the library some time and Alice agrees, warmed by the entire morning.

Alice is starting to believe in Jasper. She doesn't think it's a bad thing, either. But she does want her best friends on board, ready to steer her straight if she starts to veer off course again. So later that evening when she and her roommates are all gathering together to drag their feet to the nearest dining hall, Alice brings the topic up, feeling her face get hotter and hotter and she describes the, well, sweetness of the whole thing.

"So, he bought you an old sewing machine?" Rose reiterates.

Alice really thinks that Rose is underselling it. However… "Yes," Alice says. "He bought me an old sewing machine. And shipped it to Mississippi for me."

"Huh." Rose narrows her eyes thoughtfully, looking up at the trees as they pass underneath.

Bella snags her hand and squeezes, gifting Alice with a beatific smile. "It's kind of romantic isn't it?"

Bella gets it. Alice knew she would.

On Bella's other side, Leah snorts. "Some kid throwing his money around is romantic?"

Bella rolls her eyes. "No," she tells her sister. "It's romantic that he went out of his way to get her something he knows she's interested in. He said he saw it and thought of her. Don't you think that's romantic?"

"I think it's trying too hard," Rose says bluntly.

"I'm going with our Rosey Posey here -"

"Don't call me that!" Rose snaps

Leah blithely ignores her, leaning around Bella to pin Alice with a hard stare. "You aren't even dating and he's dropping, what, three or four hundred dollars on you?" There's a protective edge in Leah's voice that's been missing lately, but it's heard loud and clear now. Even though Leah is trying to discredit Jasper, Alice still feels warmed by Leah's attitude.

Even Bella falters at that. She looks at Alice with thinly-veiled shock. "Wait, it's how much?"

Alice titters sheepishly, ducking her head. "Probably about that amount. Maybe more…."

"So, what, is he trying to buy you?" Rose demands, coming to a full stop, her hands on her hips.

"I'm not okay with that," Bella says with a frown.

"Yeah, me either," Leah agrees, resting her chin on Bella's shoulder. "This isn't Pretty Woman, for fuck's sake. Money doesn't buy anything here."

Alice shakes her head, looking at each of them earnestly. "I don't think it's that! I think…he isn't sure how to express himself," she decides.

"You can say that again!" Leah says loudly, elbowing Bella.

Rose throws back her head with a hard laugh. "Let's see. Basically stalking one girl, trying to buy the love of another. Yeah, that strikes me as someone who doesn't know how to use his words."

Bella bites her lip, probably thinking back to her own interactions with Jasper, limited as they might be. "Ah, I see what you're saying," she says with a sympathetic smile. "But that doesn't make it okay."

"Well, no…But he's trying, right?" Alice looks at her friends hopefully.

Can they see what she sees? Or is she looking for validation that she won't find? Do they maybe see something that Alice can't see, being so close and emotionally invested in the situation?

Her friends all look at her, each of them with varying levels of thought and caution and fondness.

"You really like this guy, huh?" Leah says first, her tone somewhat resigned.

"I do," Alice confirms. "Does that make me stupid? Am I total idiot?"

Bella steps forward, pulling Alice into a comforting hug. "You're our Alice. You aren't stupid."

"Besides," Leah adds baldly. "The guy did buy you some old ass sewing machine. That means something, right?"

Rose purses her lips. "Trying too hard is still trying, so he gets credit for that."

A tremulous well of hope springs inside Alice, a faint thing with gossamer edges. "So…then it's okay if I…?"

"What? Date him?" Rose scoffs, reaching forward to pinch Alice's cheek. "Babes, it's your own damn life. We're not going to stop you. But we'll give him the worst sort of hell if he missteps again."

Bella and Leah agree, albeit Leah a bit more enthusiastically than Bella, which is to be expected given their personalities.

Alice smiles at them, her lungs expanding as the hesitancy rolls of her back, like water off a duck. She really loves her friends, for their wisdom and their support and their protectiveness. With them at her side, Alice knows she can face anything - which is something she should have remembered over the summer.

But Alice won't forget. Not again. Not when she has this friendship in her corner.

Alice can be brave.

A/N: Jasper is trying to learn his love language and Alice is just like, "He gets an A for effort!" So, what do you guys think? Is Jasper redeeming himself? Is Alice being too soft-hearted? Are they truly destined for each other after all?

As always, be brutally honest. I can take it. Stay safe, stay inside, and stay smart. If you have the urge to, oh, I don't know, go to a bar or a pool party or any other large gathering where people aren't wearing masks, please resist the urge. Looking at you, certain states in America. Looking at you and very concerned about your people. But, to that end, there is a lot of definitive proof on the masks-are-effective front. Did you guys hear about the Missouri hairstylists? The COVID positive hairstylists wore masks while they worked on like 139 clients, also all wearing masks, and guess what happened? Nobody new contracted the virus. That right there is a real-time experiment to prove, unequivocally, that masks do work. So, wear a mask! And don't get hostile at service workers who ask you to wear masks in stores/places of business - they might be making your coffee or restocking the shelves, but their lives are just as important as yours. Additionally, pulling a gun on a store worker trying to enforce a mask rule? Not cool. All you're doing is proving that, in addition to being a selfish asshole, you also shouldn't be allowed to own a gun in the first place since you obviously aren't responsible with the usage of it. Notice where that Venn diagram overlaps? Yeah, me too.

Anyway! There is one more update this week, because work has been very demanding. But at least I still have work.

~Rae