A/N: I hear you guys. I'm sorry for letting you wait for like ever. But listen, this fanfic is hard okay like I don't know what I'm doing. Because god forbid planning this on forehand. That's way too much work. I don't plan ahead or read over afterwards. Recipe for something awesome, or a disaster, you decide.

I love you all. I am trying, but whatever might happen I will only continue doing this as long as it brings me happiness, so maybe it won't last forever. I don't know how it will evolve, but I can tell my brain wanted a small break from writing for a while. Not because I don't like it, but I just didn't want to and have been instead spending time doing other stuff like drawing.

Also, fun fact I'm still posting on my other stories. shameless plug. Home is where the heart is lol go look at it if you want some more reading material from me.

I hope you are all okay and until next time, make it a great day and week, and I'll catch you soon.

Red/ S-B (yup. Changed my username so yeah….)

Maybe Natasha was the injured, hurt, damaged one, but she gave no shits about following the rules or letting anyone push her around. Maybe it was different when she was in the actual tower with her actual team, but here nobody was her boss, clearly. If anything, she was the one running the show letting none of them even try to get a word in.

All of the higher-ranked agents, May, Coulson and Hill had all stopped even trying to take charge, and the smaller younger agents only kept their mouth shut knowing they had no say in whatever this really was.

Coulson and May went back to the tower two days later, while the rest of them stayed at the Barton farm. Skye thought about joining them, but she would feel even more left out if she didn't stay back with Natasha. Not that she felt like she was talking to the woman at all. The woman spent a lot of the time with the kids or Laura. And if she wasn't doing that she was training with Bobbi or Clint.

Everything between 6am – 8pm was non-work-related time. If any of them even tried to bring it up it was a big chance Natasha would kick them out of the room. She had absolute zero tolerance and at worst she would stand up and plain leave the room. It didn't matter if Coulson called or Jemma had found something that probably could count as a breakthrough in their search, Natasha would not care, and you would just have to wait it out.

Everyone found it frustrating, everyone beside Maria, and Laura if you wanted to count her as well. They were the only two that didn't seem to be bothered by Natasha literally shutting everyone's mouth by threatening them to kill them. Clint seemed to be slightly okay with it as well, which was to be expected. He knew Natasha so this was probably not a new territory for him.

Skye didn't really know what do to. She was trying to look around at some work Fitz has sent her and such, but her head was at the wrong place and it was hard to concentrate.

Skye was sitting with her pc in her lap inside looking out the window while she tried to work. Outside she could see Bobbi with Natasha. It was dusk, but the two of them were out doing some sort of training. Bobbi was copying Natasha's stand while Natasha was coaching her. They had been outside for a while, and technically it was work hours and they were supposed to be inside working on this case trying to figure out HYDRA and this crazy man who fucked with their head.

Skye looked down at her pc again with a loud sigh. They had tried to track this guy for a solid week, and they had nothing. It was frustrating. Skye's program had gotten a clear picture of a face, but the real problem was now to understand who he was. They had a name. A really generic as name. James Johansson. And according to every filing system ever it was like a million of those. And yes, of course, they had gone down the list, matched it with the face and looked at every single detail about his life. But it was nothing interesting there.

This James, he was just an ordinary guy. He was just a few years older than Natasha and looked to be a very normal man. The only thing was a few years ago he started to take a step back. But nothing more than just lay a bit low it seemed. He liked to travel and was moving all over the world exploring. It didn't seem like he was hiding according to Fitz. It was just a man who likes to see the world.

Skye lifted her head when she saw a movement outside. It was Bobbi who made a small run before she flipped gracefully in a kind of front flip thingy with Natasha watching her from the side. She watched as Natasha nodded softly before she walked over to the blond and changed her stance slightly with a soft, careful movement.

Even trough the window, Skye could see Bobbi's eyes widen as Natasha moved her arms slowly. Skye wasn't surprised Bobbi and Natasha had a natural connection. They were both great spies with a lot of similar traits. Bobbi was the less experience of the two, but she had such a love for learning. And Natasha was such a great teacher as well, so it was only a matter of time really.

"Don't tell me, you feel left out." Skye felt it through her whole body as she froze and could literally feel the fear go from her toes up to her head when Maria snuck up on her.

"Holy shit" Skye mumbled, still feeling her spine vibrate as Maria slowly moved around to face her.

"You would think you would have gotten less jumpy by now," Maria said with a small smile making Skye wanting to literally evaporate and just never ever be seen again.

"I don't think left out is the word I would use…" Skye mumbled trying to get the burning in her cheeks under control still feeling her heart pound in her chest.

"Though I would like to actually try to find this guy. And staying here and having only a few hours working together is not helping… Especially when they aren't even here when we are supposed to work." Skye muttered the last part as she scrolled down on her pc not really paying attention to what she was doing or looking at.

"Well, if you haven't noticed, Natasha's head is far from the black widow when she is here. It's wonderful to see."

"It's really annoying." Skye stopped and looked at Maria who gave her a surprised look as she tried to finish her sentence.

"Not as in, I don't think she deserves a life, but I don't even recognize her. She is nothing like she was before, and I don't like it. And I don't like how she isn't spending her time actually trying to get control over this dude when he literally made her suffer for years!" Skye let out a small sigh before she closed her laptop after a fast save.

The older agent looked at the girl with a look in her eyes that Skye wasn't sure meant she wanted to kick her out the door or if she agreed.

Maybe she was being really childish, but that was how she felt right now. And at least she finally got it out of her system, because she was just so frustrated.

"You sound like you haven't changed at all the last few years?" Maria said with a calm voice leaning back in her chair smiling at the younger woman. Immediately Skye felt like she was in therapy. But now the therapist was also a world-class agent who could probably beat her ass in 50 different ways. Or more. And it was something about the look in Maria's eyes it was hard to disagree or argue with her.

"Point taken." Skye only mumbled back lowering her head not wanting to start something really dumb now.

"Natasha was at the absolute lowest without you Skye. I know it feels like everything have changed between you two, but I want you to know, Natasha needs you. You just need time to figure it all out again. And she needs time. To heal. This is her process. And I know it feels really weird and maybe a bit distant. But I promise you this is what she needs now. And she will come to you when the time is right." Maria said with a small smile before she stood up and walked over to the kitchen leaving her behind.

Maybe Maria was right, and they needed time. But time was the last thing she wanted now. She wanted progress. She wanted to do something. Anything.

Skye turned her head when she heard steps from outside the living room. Laura walked in with Jemma behind her with a soft smile on her face as she listened to Jemma talk to her with a calm voice. The two of them had hit it off extremely well, and again while Skye didn't want to be the jealous type it just felt like everyone for some reason really clicked with each other and she didn't.

Why wouldn't Jemma and Laura hit it off really? They were so similar in so many ways. And Skye was basically the opposite of Jemma.

"So, I am guessing the kids are actually in bed now?" Maria said as she lifted her glass of water to slip on watching as the two entered the room together.

"Something like that," Laura said with a small almost mischievous smile. "Clint is with them. So, we'll see how it goes" Laura continued as she sat down to join them. Her voice was so kind in every way, and Skye could definitely see why Natasha felt drawn and save around her. It was like she was just radiating kindness

"Are they still going? Haven't they been doing this for hours now?" Jemma said as she turned to the window to watch Bobbi launch herself into yet another flip while Natasha continued to instruct her.

"Yes, and I am starting to wonder if we will ever get back to work!" Skye let out frustrated. Her tone was maybe a bit angrier than she had planned, earning an annoyed look from Maria and a confused one from Laura.

"I just mean we haven't really gotten anywhere the last few days" Skye tried, giving Maria a small look that certainly did not help the case at all. The senior agent glared back at her and Skye, who already felt beyond stupid turned her head away from her.

"You know what… I'm just going to shut up I think." Skye mumbled turning her head back to her pc. Whatever she said something it always seemed to come out the wrong way, and she didn't need to make everyone mad at her. She also didn't need to make herself look like a fool.

They sat there for at least a good 20 minutes before they all turned their head to the staircase as Clint finally joined them downstairs. By then it was actually dark outside, and Skye didn't really see the point of training outside in the dark. But Natasha and Bobbi hadn't joined them inside yet, the group finally decided to start looking into some of the work alone even without the two agents.

May and Coulson had already sent them lots of materials together with Fitz, so it was no shortage of work to be done. But since none of them wanted to take charge, the work speed was way slower than Skye would have wanted. The whole group was clearly in this unmotivated, and a lot more playful mood, instead of focused, and it was driving her insane.

For the second time, the whole group lifted their heads when they heard a muffled scream outside followed by a grunt and a thud. Laura was already on her feet and almost out the backdoor before Skye got herself up on her feet to follow the sound. The look on the mother's face already told Skye this was Natasha even though she herself had not even had a chance to identify the sound as something the spy would ever have made.

While she knew she didn't have to follow Laura and Clint she felt she had too. Even though she probably would not be helpful at all, and Jemma and Maria who held back would be a lot more helpful if anything had or were to happen.

It was pitch black outside. Where Skye knew Bobbi and Natasha and been training earlier were now just an empty space with none of them in shight. But the sound had been so clear it had to be at least close. Skye just didn't understand from where. Unless she screamed louder than Skye originally thought. And if so, that would be bad.

Shit.

She was getting a bit scared now.

Thankfully both Clint and Laura seemed to know exactly where they were headed as they both took a sharp turn around a corner only exchanging one look before they moved towards where Skye knew the barn house was. It took them only a few seconds and another corner before they saw some dimmed lights.

"Hey, it's okay." Skye almost walked straight into Clint as he came to an abrupt halt in front of what was just two shadows, barely getting lit up by the nearby light.

Bobbi was leaning over Natasha's body breathing heavily as she spoke softly to the redhead. The avenger was squeezed up against the wall and between the blond, and for a moment it didn't even seem like she was breathing.

Skye could feel her own heart staring to race in her chest. Unsure of what to do and what was going on in front of her. She couldn't see anything other than Bobbi's back. She was shielding off most of Natasha with her own body, but Skye could see part of the red hair spread across the ground. And with her beating, scared, heart, she felt herself tense up even more as she watched Bobbi slowly help Natasha to move to get up from the ground.

The redhead spent a worrying amount of time getting herself up into a sitting position, closing her eyes as Bobbi leaned her up against the wall.

Physically she looked fine. Of course, they knew she was injured from her previous mission but looking past that Skye couldn't see anything wrong with her. She looked fine. Or at least as fine as she could look. But she was still mostly hidden behind the bigger woman and Skye was struggling to really understand what was going on in front of her as Natasha kept letting out small groans.

"It's okay, it's okay." Bobbi continued to talk with a low voice still covering most of the girl with her own body. It was hard to tell what was happening. With both the dark and the fact that Bobbi wasn't letting them close to her they had no idea what had happened nor what was happening. And the one guess Skye had was not a pleasant one. She really hoped she was wrong.

"Natasha. Look at me. It's going to be okay. Trust me." Bobbi continued this not as soft but a more almost strict voice. As if she tried to wake the woman up with her tone of voice "Trust me, trust yourself." She whispered leaning forward when the woman didn't show any sign of response.

Skye couldn't see exactly what the woman was doing but only a few seconds later Bobbi moved her head and for the first time giving Skye a good view of Natasha's face. She was completely white, and her eyes were drained with all life. It looked like she had been thrown off a building or something with both stressed and clearly in pain look in her eyes. She had some dirt on her face and her hair was messy. She really didn't look well. With shaking, hands and the tired look made an awful combination.

"Oh, honey," Laura whispered as she too got a look at the girl, moving forward slowly to get a better look at her. To everyone's surprised the small movement from the woman seemed to completely throw the woman off as she threw herself away from the woman, not getting far only slamming into the wall behind her with a loud groan.

Skye watched as Laura's eyes lit up in fear before she backed up. They all knew how close Laura and Natasha was, so the fact Natasha now were clearly scared of her was really an indication of how bad this was.

Bobbi turned her head towards the small group with one both confused and scared look before she turned her head back towards Natasha. "Natasha, it's only Laura," Bobbi mumbled as she slowly let her hand glide over Natasha's shaking arm.

Skye felt so bad for even getting mad at the two earlier now. Natasha was a mess. They both were. And the fact that she had gotten annoyed at the redhead when she clearly needed to break off from this case was so unfair. She had been selfish, not being able to look past her own anger. When Natasha just a few days ago had literally talked to her about this exact topic.

Natasha was still shaking as she closed her eyes leaning back on the wall she had just crashed into, trying to collect herself as her shaking only got increasingly worse. It was hard to even focus on anything other than Natasha. Both the way she was moving, and breathing was so awful to look at and listen too, but impossible to look away from. She was so clearly in discomfort even if it wasn't physical pain.

Skye watched as the woman brought both her hands to her head coving her eyes with a small sigh trying to take a deep breath. Forcing her hands still by her head resulted in her legs starting to shake. And while the woman tried to calm down it was not a successful attempt. It anything it seemed to get worse. A lot worse.

"Hey. Hey, it's okay." Bobbi tried again this time moving even closer to the woman only a few inches from the redhead.

Even if Natasha was squeezed up against the wall right now, Skye knew very well that if Natasha, for some reason tried, or something triggered her to do so, she could snap Bobbi's neck in an instant. And if she did. None of them would be close enough, and not even remotely fast or strong enough to stop her.

While the present Natasha wasn't a fan of killing, the woman had not held back in the past. And while she normally always could control herself, always aiming to injure rather than kill, her training in the red room had made her instinct to always go for the fatal result and nothing in between. What the red room had done to her had always been Natasha's biggest fear as well as her biggest talent. And Skye was well aware that the scars were so deep and integrated into the woman's system, reflexes and instincts, a lot of the time not even she was aware of her own actions before the damage was done.

But still, Bobbi, who was too aware of how strong and very dangerous this action was, continued to move closer to the woman before finally touching the woman's face.

It was like the woman melted in front of them. The second Bobbi finally got to her the body shut off. Her eyes rolled back into her head and Bobbi had to physically throw herself forward to catch the woman before she ended up on the ground again.

"Shit" Skye watched as the blond in shock held around the now completely unconscious woman, scrambling with her hands to feel after her pulse.

"Her heart. It's dangerously fast." Bobbi turned to them with a look that screamed panic. "She is struggling to breathe. She needs oxygen." Bobbi continued, trying to keep her voice as steady as possible even though she sounded more desperate by the second.

"I'm getting Maria and Simmons." Skye turned around the second Clint ran off. Feeling compactly helpless at the moment. The woman could only stand there as Laura for the second time tried to move over to Bobbi to help her. She wasn't able to move a limb.

The blond held the woman still as Laura was now leaning over her inspecting the redhead. She could see the emotions in Laura's eyes as she held around the woman's face and neck trying to stabilize her head. "come on Nat. please." Laura whispered as the woman let out a small, chocked gasp.

The mother didn't turn around before they could hear Jemma, Maria and Clint run over to them. And it was then Skye saw how horrified Laura really was. She had seemed so calm but when she turned around her face was lit up in fear.

Clint was the first one by them and instead of going after Natasha he instead grabbed Laura dragging her into his arms and away from the redhead just before Maria and Jemma reached her seconds later.

"What the hell happened to her?" Maria fell to the ground but didn't get a reply before Jemma shoved what seemed like an Ambu mag into her hands. Maria looked back at Jemma for a second but still not getting an answer as the doctor focused her eyes on the woman in front of them instead of her.

"She is really struggling," Jemma whispered not moving from her spot only holding a hand on the redhead's chest as Maria tried to get the resuscitator going.

"Then why hell aren't you doing something?!" Clint snapped holding around Laura tightly as he looked horrified at the doctor.

Instead of replying, Jemma stayed silent letting them watch as Maria helped Natasha take the first deep breath. The gasp was desperate and her whole upper body arched in desperation when she finally seemed to get back her breath. With her whole body shaking in Bobbi's strong arms, they all watched as the woman continued to gasp.

"How are you even still alive?" Jemma mumbled as she slowly lifted the shirt away from the redhead's chest letting her hand rest on her body.

The comment made Sky's skin tighten. If Jemma was questioning the ability of the woman's body to keep her alive that could not be good at all.

She had finally stopped to gasp, and her body seemed to finally start to relax. Occasionally Skye could see her face twitch, but it seemed better. Or at least more stable than her previous gasping for oxygen.

"let's move her inside," Jemma said finally, lifting her hand from her chest and standing up slowly. Maria looked at her for a second before she slowly, hesitantly, moved then Ambu mag away from the redhead and followed Jemma's lead to stand up.

Thankfully Natasha's body seemed stable and strong enough to run on its own now. But clearly, Jemma already knew that.

Bobbi looked down at the woman on her lap before she carefully slipped her arm under her leg slowly lifting her up from the ground, standing up slowly.

As the blond carried Natasha away Skye looked at her in silence not even moving from her spot before Clint put a hand on her shoulder snapping her out of her trance.

She was shaking. She could feel her body shaking as she tried to force herself to follow them. She felt paralyzed.

The second they got inside, and Natasha settled on the big couch supported by Bobbi in her arms, they went directly to Shield.

"What the hell happened?!" it was May who picked up and her voice was already on edge as she leaned closer to the hologram. Clearly even before she had gotten a clear picture in front of her, she had known something was wrong. But the second her eyes landed on Natasha Skye watched her face change into a more scared look.

"Is that Natasha?!" Skye could hear Phil's stressed voice enter the call before he only a second later walked into the frame.

"We don't know. We weren't there, only Bobbi" Clint starter trying to get the conversation going clearly not wanting to have to look at Natasha's unconscious body for much longer.

"Morse?" May asked with both sharp and confused voice as she turned her head towards the Mockingbird.

"I don't know what happened." Bobbi started slowly letting her hand glide through the red hair. She had one hand on the redhead's chest to feel it rise and fall under her fingers while playing with her hair with the other. She didn't look up at May as she spoke. Only keeping her eyes at the redhead.

"We were training. And after putting away some equipment in the barn she just… something happened. It wasn't like last time when she seemed to get this vision. She just. Switched. She jumped at me. I… I threw her down on the ground with me. I thought it would snap her out of it. And if not, at least I could keep her down. But she got the upper hand before I even registered what happened. She was only a few seconds away from my neck before I kicked her off me into the wall." Bobbi whispered. This time she did lift her face to meet the group. But mainly she looked at Laura. Almost as she was apologizing.

"She attacked you?" Coulson asked looking at the woman who was now sleeping in the blonde's arms. His voice sounded like it was in unbelief.

"Well, she got scared of Laura too, so I guess we don't know what to expect anymore," Skye said with a half sarcastic voice earning a very sharp and angry look from all of the veteran agents.

"Hey, I'm just saying. It happened. I don't know what really happened back there, but it looked like she was genuinely scared of her." Skye said throwing a look at Laura who only nodded slowly. None of them replied to her. but Skye hadn't really expected them to.

After a very awkward minute of silence May finally broke it again. "How bad was it?" her voice was low, but Skye still noticed a lot more emotion in it than she had heard her use around in the bus. Both her voice and her face showed she was clearly very concerned, just like she had been when she had arrived at the farm earlier when Natasha had had the first episode.

"Bad. But she pushed through. As always. Sometimes part of me wonders how she does it. The other part wishes she didn't." Maria mumbled.

Skye felt her whole body stop for a second. What had Maria just said? Surely, she had heard that wrong. Or maybe her brain interpreted it wrong. She couldn't mean…?

She lifted her head to see a shocked face from May. She looked just as shocked as she felt. So, she hadn't heard wrong then. But that meant that Maria… "Maria how can you say that?! You know we-" the woman got cut off when Laura stood up. Her eyes were upset, and Skye watched as the tears pushed on her.

"I need to go." Laura turned around and even before she got out of the room the tears were streaming down her face. Skye turned in her seat so confused about what was going on. Natasha had said something back in the quinjet but…

"Well, I don't know what you were expecting Hill, but there you go!" May was already on her feet as if she was going to punch Maria through the hologram

"You know what I meant!" Maria was shaking in her chair.

"I am never letting you touch her ever again if that is the way you are going to treat her." May's voice was only a growl back and Skye could clearly see the anger in her eyes ride.

"Well, you weren't here feeling her heart beating out of her chest!" Maria screamed back when Clint finally raised his voice.

"We ALL know what you meant Maria and as much as I know she wished that upon herself that is not the answer. And I know you will never go there either, but I do not want to hear anyone mention anything like that ever. Even if part of me really agrees with you after witnessing this." Clint looked between the two women before they finally nodded.

"We just need to focus. So, we can find this man and stop whatever he is doing and end her suffering. Have I made myself clear?" Clint looked at all of them meeting Skye's eyes for a second forcing a nod out of her.

A/N: I am not a medic. Obviously. And I know nothing about medicine or anything. I do this for fun. that's all. And I know you know this but putting a disclaimer here anyways.

It was actually surprisingly fun writing this chapter. So maybe I'll do this as a side thing when I need a break from HIWTHI. I know people want me to finish this one as well so it a win for everyone xD