She slowly made her way in to the front room and was relieved to find it was only Jill and Matron in there
"Are you alright" said Jill moving over to her and placing one hand on her forehead while the other took her wrist
"Yes, I'm fine stop fussing" replied Ash trying to wriggle away but it was no good Jill just tightened her grip
"You will tell me if not, wont you" replied Jill
"Yes, mum, I'm fine really, just felt a little cold I promise" replied Ash sitting at the coffee table and opening to the sketch she was doing upstairs and taking a sip of her tea
Jill made herself comfy on the sofa behind her and was sat talking to matron but Ash could tell she was keeping a close eye on her she knew she had really scared her back in the woods earlier in the day what she didn't know was that matron had told them about what she had said on the stairs
Twenty minutes later and Ash had started another sketch this one was of the three of them at the table having dinner from her perceptive so she wasn't actually in it but it was how she saw it. The others had slowly made their way in it was getting really cold out there now
"Would anyone like another drink" asked Jill
Every replied yes Gordon and the others had just started a game
"Would you like a hand" asked matron
"You are our guest, Ash will help me won't you Ash" replied Jill
"Of course, happy to" replied Ash putting her pencil down and going out to the kitchen and putting the kettle on she also started drying some of the plates and cups that Jill had already washed up it was then she realised that Jill hadn't followed her in making her way back into the front room
"Mum" Ash queried she then saw what they were looking at she made her way back to the kitchen
Why had she left it on the table, why she knew they were looking at everything she did at the moment, did she want them to find it
The kettle flicked off, Ash quickly wiped away the tears and told herself to man up she made her way over and filled the tea pot and then refilled the kettle to make some coffee. While she was waiting for the kettle she got the tray ready with cups and saucers, sugar and milk.
Meanwhile Jill, matron and Gordon were looking at her pictures, there were the three that she had done of today some of the plants in the garden and then there were the last two the two they were all talking about the ones from her nightmares
"Gordon these are of her nightmares, they seem so real" said Jill
"What a vivid imagination" said Matron
"Gordon" said Jill seeing the look on his face seeing the cliff brought all those memories flooding back
"If only I could've done more" he muttered
"Gordon it was not your fault" replied Jill
"I know" he replied but before he could say anymore they were interrupted
Ash had come in with one tray with the cups and teapot and placed it on the table near to where they were she kept her head down
"Coffee is just coming" she said while walking back out the door
"Stupid, stupid, stupid" Ash muttered to herself walking back to the kitchen, she then swore to herself she would never draw another picture again as long as she lived she would finish her parents present and that was it.
Ash then filled the coffee pot and turned around to see Jill in the doorway watching, she felt a twinge in her side and tried to hide the pain
"Sorry it's just here" Ash said picking up the coffee pot and making her way towards the door trying not to make eye contact with Jill
"It's not that" replied Jill
"I'm sorry you weren't suppose to see them" replied Ash trying to get past Jill
"We need to talk" said Jill seriously
"All we do is talk" replied Ash "Plus they are waiting for this" she added
"This is not going away" replied Jill taking the coffee pot from her and taking it to the front room she was surprised to find Ash hadn't followed her she poked her head around the door she could see Ash busying herself in the kitchen
Jill picked up the sketch pad, her and Ash's drinks and took them to the kitchen and placed them on the table
"Sit down" Jill said
"Sorry" mumbled Ash biting her nail
Jill passed her drink over
"Thank-you" said Ash
"Sweetheart you are not in trouble" said Jill
"Yeah right" said Ash
"What's that supposed to mean" Asked Jill
"Well all I seem to be is in trouble" replied Ash
"Sweetheart, really you are not" said Jill
"I just wanted to ask about these" said Jill showing the two pictures
"What are they" she continued
"They are my nightmares" replied Ash
"Why did you draw them" asked Jill
"I don't know, it was all I could think of so I guess I drew them hoping it would help" replied Ash
"Did anyone tell you to draw this one" said Jill pointing at the one of the cliff
"No I swear" replied Ash "Why" she queried
"No reason" replied Jill
"Have I done something wrong, have I upset you" Ash asked panicked
"No sweetheart, you've done nothing wrong" replied Jill
"I have haven't I" said Ash getting up
"I'm so sorry" she made to leave
"Ash" said Jill grabbing her arm stopping her from leaving, Jill got up and pulled her into a hug
"You have done nothing wrong I promise I just want to talk that's all" she added
Once Jill had let her go Ash sat down again
"When did you do these" Jill asked
"Well that one I did today" said Ash pointing at the one of Sister Brigid pulling her away from a group of people who Jill now saw two of which were her and Gordon
"And the other one I don't know about nine, ten weeks ago when I first started having the dream" said Ash truthfully
They sat in silence for a few minutes
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you" said Ash
"It's alright it was just a shock seeing it again" said Jill
"What do you mean again" queried Ash
They had secretly hoped this day would never come but it was here at last they were going to have to tell her the truth about what had happened that day. Jill was about to begin when matron came in to say her goodbyes
"Right well I will be off now, thank you very much for a lovely day" said Matron
"Ohh gosh is that the time, yes thank you matron, goodbye and thank you again" said Jill getting up and giving her a peck on the cheek
"Bye matron" said Ash giving her a kiss as well
Matron turned back to Jill
"Don't be too hard on her" she said to Jill
"And that goes for you to" she added to Ash
"Promise" they both replied together
Gordon was giving her a lift home and was already in the car, Jill and Ash stood by the front door and waved her off
"Right where were we" said Jill turning back inside Ash followed
In between the others coming in and saying goodnight Jill started telling her about what had happened that day, she thought she was old enough now to understand the whole truth, when she had finished they sat in silence for a few minutes Jill was close to tears
"I'm so sorry, I didn't know if I had I never would have drawn it" said Ash starting to cry
"It's alright sweetheart, you weren't to know" said Jill getting up to sooth her
"I'm sorry" sobbed Ash
Jill was going to say something when they heard the front door close Gordon had come back from dropping Matron off
Ash ran over to him and said "I'm so sorry"
"I'm sorry to" he said giving her a cuddle looking over at Jill stood in the doorway
"Right young lady time for bed it's really late" said Jill
"Night Dad" said Ash giving him a kiss
"Night" he replied letting her go
"Night mum" Ash said while giving her a kiss Jill pulled her into a hug
"Night sweetheart" Jill replied
They watched her go up stairs, then they both went to say something
"No you go first" said Gordon following Jill who was tidying up after everyone again
"Gordon I'm sorry" she started
"No I'm sorry, I should never have put you in that situation" he interrupted
"I told her everything about that day" Jill started
"Gordon are you listening" she asked when he hadn't replied
"Yes, yes, sorry it just brought back some ugly memories" he replied following Jill into the kitchen
Jill put the cups down on the side and turned around to face Gordon
"I do love you" she said and gave him a hug
"I love you too"
"Let's leave this I will help you in the morning it's been a long day" Gordon added taking her hand and leading her upstairs