"Ash, how is your ache now" asked Jill, she was sat watching Ash pack away the board and she could see how pale she had become
"It's about the same as earlier, in fact do you mind if I go on up to bed" asked Ash, putting the game back on the shelf
"Well, you know where we are" replied Jill
"Night, mum, love you" replied Ash, going to leave the room
"Night, sweetheart" replied Jill, she didn't want to let Ash out of her sight, all she wanted was a cuddle, but how could she tell Ash this
"Drinks" said Gordon, coming through the door, carrying a tray
"Thanks dad, night dad" said Ash grabbing a drink and carrying on to her room
"Night" said a rather bemused Gordon
"Is everything okay" asked Gordon setting the tray down
"No, yes I mean no" said Jill
Gordon didn't say anything he knew Jill would continue when she found the right words
"I guess, I'm just worried about dad" said Jill
Gordon knew there was more to this, so just put his arm around Jill and waited
"And then of course there is the fact that if we give her the space everyone says, we should that we lose her, I know it sounds silly, but we don't get to see the others very much, even when they are staying here" added Jill
"Well, that won't happen" said Gordon
"Don't go saying things like that, you can't know for sure" replied Jill
"No, but what I do know for sure is that you and Ash have a great friendship, you are more than just her mother, you are her friend as well and nothing can come between that, and I don't think Ash could bare to be away from you for too long either, in fact I don't think I know and you know something else I have always been slightly jealous of how close you two really are" replied Gordon
"I hope you are right" replied Jill
Ash had stayed on the stairs and heard most of that conversation, she felt slightly better knowing she had the same fears as Jill, now she just had to find the right time to tell them she had remembered all of what had happened Ash carried on to her room and placed her cup down on her bedside table, she then pulled out her notebook and started jotting down her fears, thoughts and memories
Jill and Gordon stayed downstairs for about an hour, they had watched the news and then were making their way upstairs, there was still no sign of the others
Meanwhile Ash had fallen asleep and was having a nightmare
"Mum, please wake up" mumbled Ash
"Gordon" said Jill as they walked past Ash's room, checking to see if he had heard it too
Gordon nodded, he slowly opened the door, they could see Ash was asleep
"Please look after mum" mumbled Ash
"Sshhh, sweetheart, it's alright" said Gordon
Jill went to say something but before she could Ash woke with a start
"Mum" said Ash looking at both of them
"It's alright, we are here" said Jill soothingly, she sat on Ash's bed
"Please, don't leave me" said Ash
"we're not" started Jill but before she could finish Ash had wrapped her arms around her
"Sweetheart, what's wrong" asked Jill, not able to move, she looked at Gordon
Ash didn't say anything, but she didn't let go either
"Ash, sweetheart" said Gordon,
"Sorry, I'm so sorry" said Ash letting Jill go, she brought her knees up and wrapped her arms around them
"It's alright" replied Jill, rubbing Ash's arm
"What's wrong" asked Gordon
"Nothing, it's fine, I was just being silly over reacting" said Ash, stifling a yawn
"Night, sweet dreams" said Gordon, knowing there was no point in pushing Ash in to talk when she was tired she would tell them when she was ready
"I'm so sorry" replied Ash
"Don't be silly, that's what we are here for" replied Jill
"Night" replied Ash
"Night, sweet dreams" said Jill, tucking Ash in and giving her a kiss on her forehead
Jill and Gordon left shutting the door and carried on to their room
Gordon looked at Jill
"Don't say it" said Jill
"Twice in one day, you won't doubt me again" replied Gordon
"I will give it to you, but you were wrong about the others having learnt their lesson" replied Jill
Jill and Gordon slept soundly they woke to their alarm clock they hadn't even heard the others come in at about three in the morning
While Gordon was getting ready, Jill went off to see how Ash and the others were doing, Jill tapped on Ash's door, when there was no answer she let herself in, she found the room empty, she checked in on the others she could tell it had been late, they were all sound asleep in Toms room, they hadn't even been bothered to get changed into their pyjamas, she shut the door and left them to it
Jill was making her way back to her room, when she heard noises downstairs, she made her way down, she could see the others had just kicked their shoes off and left them strewn across the floor, she walked to the kitchen where she could hear the noise
"Ash" said Jill
"Sorry, did I wake you" asked Ash, it looked like she was trying to tidy the mess
Jill was trying to figure out if Ash had made all this mess, or if she was trying to cover up for the others
"Are, you alright, what are you doing" asked Jill
"I'm fine, I couldn't sleep so was going to make a drink" started Ash, she then looked at Jill, she was deciding on whether to tell the truth, or make up a lie to protect the others, but Jill looked so tired, so she decided on the truth
"The kitchen was a mess, and I know you and dad are sick of tidying up behind us" said Ash
"So, you thought you would help" replied Jill giving Ash a cuddle
"Yes, sorry" replied Ash
"You have nothing to be sorry for, if only the others were more considerate" replied Jill
"The kettles just boiled if you want a drink" asked Ash
"Yes, I think I will" replied Jill, making a drink for both of them, and helping Ash tidy up before Gordon came down and kicked off about the mess
They had just sat down when they could hear Gordon coming down the stairs
"So, do you want to talk about last night" asked Jill
Ash shook her head
"It was just me being silly, I'm so sorry" replied Ash
"I see the others, made it back" said Gordon
"Yes, I don't know what time, but they were their usual tidy selves" replied Jill
"I think it was about three" said Ash
"What, where you doing up at three" asked Jill concerned, even Gordon stopped what he was doing
"I wasn't awake, I don't know how to explain" said Ash, Jill looked at Gordon
"Can you try" asked Gordon
"Ever since, I can't it sounds stupid" started Ash
"No, it won't, just try for us" replied Jill, taking Ash's hand
Ash nodded
"Ever, since the accident, any loud bang makes me jump, see I told you it was stupid" said Ash quickly
"It's not stupid, it's a natural reaction, especially after what you have been through" replied Gordon
"Yes, dad's right" added Jill
"But, how come you are not so jumpy" asked Ash
"Because I didn't go through, what you did, and I'm so sorry for that" replied Jill
"Wait, so when the others banged the window, that's what made you jump" asked Gordon, now starting to piece things together
"Yes, that was the first time, I had heard a loud bang after, I'm so sorry" replied Ash
"And then when Rob found you in the storeroom, he knocked on the door" said Jill
"Yes, I said sorry straight away, I'll apologise again next time I see him" said Ash
"There's no need, he knows how sorry you are" replied Jill
Just then there was a loud knock at the front door Jill and Gordon got to see the look on Ash's face and how she jumped when it happened
"It's alright sweetheart" said Jill, squeezing her hand
"I'll get it" said Gordon
"What's wrong with me" asked Ash
"Nothing" replied Jill
Gordon opened the door it was the postman he had a letter that was too big for the letterbox
"Thank you" said Gordon taking the post and shutting the door before making his way back
"It, was the postman" said Gordon putting the post on the table
"Gordon, will you tell her there is nothing wrong with her, she won't listen to me" replied Jill
"Ash, there is nothing wrong with you, what you are experiencing is perfectly normal" replied Gordon
"So, what is it, that you are feeling every time you hear the bang" asked Jill, she wasn't sure if Ash would open up and talk about it but while they were all talking she thought it was a risk worth taking
Ash looked at her parents then at the clock
"We, haven't got time for me to explain it now, you will be late, but I will meet you for lunch and will tell you then" replied Ash
Jill wanted to say something, she didn't care if she was late she just wanted to help her baby, but Gordon said something first
"Ash, you are right, I will come and pick you up at lunch time" said Gordon
Ash got up and left before they could change their minds
"Gordon, what did you do that for, so what if we were a little late, she was going to trust us and let us in" said Jill
"And she will, later, it will give us a little more time to discuss this properly, without it being so rushed and it also gives us time to come up with ways to help in the meantime" replied Gordon
Jill knew he was right, but it didn't mean she liked it, she didn't like seeing Ash like that and she didn't know how she was supposed to concentrate knowing this
"Right so, what mess did the others leave" asked Gordon, changing the subject
"Just the usual" replied Jill
"Right well, I'm going to have words with them right now" replied Gordon going upstairs
"They were all in Tom's room" said Jill following Gordon upstairs but she carried on to their room to get ready
"Wakey, wakey" shouted Gordon
"Dad, what time is it" asked Jonathon
"Time to get up" replied Gordon
"Tom, Katie up you get" added Gordon
"Dad, it's too early" replied Tom groggily
"No, it's not" replied Gordon
"What's going on" asked Katie
"What's going on, is you are going to get up, you are going to do your packing, and no arguments" said Gordon
"Yeah, we will do it later" said Tom going back to sleep
"No, you will do it now" shouted Gordon
"Okay, okay, I'm up" replied Tom
"Why, are you being like this" asked Katie
"Because you have had your fun, now it's time to get your work done" said Gordon
"Can't we sleep and do it later" asked Jonathon
"No, you can't, did you think about us when you came in last night" replied Gordon
"It, was more like this morning" replied Tom, cheekily, that was a bad mistake
"Right, that is it all of you up now" shouted Gordon
"You are all going to pack your own bags, you are then going to clean the house, because we have all had enough of clearing up behind you and god forbid that it is not done by the time I come back at lunch time" said Gordon
"Are you listening" asked Gordon when they hadn't replied
"Yes dad" they all replied
"You are not going to get Ash to do any of it for you, because from what I understand she has already tidied up after you this morning and that it wasn't the first time" said Gordon
"But what if" started Jonathon
"She is not well, she is not helping" stated Gordon
"Why, what's wrong" asked Katie
"Dad" said Ash from behind him
"Ash, what's wrong" asked Katie
"Nothing, I don't want everyone to know, please dad" pleaded Ash
"It's nothing to be ashamed of" replied Gordon
"Please" pleaded Ash
"Right you are not to help, this lot" replied Gordon
"Please dad, don't single me out" said Ash Jill had now joined them, this was taking longer than he had thought
"Yeah dad, if she wants to help let her" said Tom
"Right, Ash you are coming with us now, go and get ready" said Gordon
"Gordon" said Jill
"No, they will get her to do everything and go back to bed, this way they have to do it themselves" replied Gordon
Jill knew he was right, but she also knew Ash was feeling singled out, she kept being treated differently to the others and it was starting to cause a rift
"Right I will leave a list, and I want it all done when I get back" said Gordon
Ash was busy getting ready go, Katie stormed past Jill and Gordon to go to her room, she slammed her door
Jill and Gordon looked at each other
"Nooo" shouted Ash
"Ash, it's alright, everything is alright" said Jill
"Ash" said Katie
"What's wrong" asked Katie as she was the first there
"Just go away" said Ash
"It's alright Katie, we can take it from here" said Jill
"Katie, we need to talk" said Gordon
"Dad, please" said Ash shaking her head
"Okay" said Gordon, he had to respect her wishes, but he didn't understand why she was ashamed, if the others knew then they could help
"Let's just go" said Ash
"Did, you hurt yourself" asked Jill
Ash didn't want anyone apart from Jill to know, so she looked at Jill and then at the others who were now all in the doorway
"Is that blood" asked Jonathon
"Mum" said Ash
"Right all of you out, Gordon can you get my bag please" stated Jill
"Yes, let's give them some space" said Gordon
"Ash, sit on the bed please" said Jill
Ash moved over to the bed, she winced as she tried to lift up her top for Jill to see
"It's alright I'll do that" said Jill
"I'm so sorry" said Ash
"I've done it again, haven't I" added Ash
"You have nothing to be sorry for, but yes it looks like you have pulled your stitches out" said Jill
"Ouch" said Ash as Jill tried to take the plaster off
"Sorry, baby" said Jill
Gordon knocked on the door
"Come in" said Jill Ash tried to cover herself up
"It's alright, it's just dad" said Jill
"So, here you go" said Gordon handing over the bag
"Thank you" said Jill taking the bag and getting a few things out
"Right, Ash this is going to sting" said Jill
"Okay, just do it" said Ash
"Arggh" said Ash
"Sorry, baby" said Jill
"Right, I'm just going to put a temporary plaster on it, when we get to the royal we will take a closer look at it" said Jill
"No, just do it now" said Ash
"It's not that easy" said Gordon, who had also taken a look at it
"Right let's get this top back on, I will get a clean one for after" said Jill, helping Ash with her top and then getting a clean one out of the draw
"I'm so sorry" said Ash
"You are alright and that is all that matters" said Gordon
"Right, lets get going" said Jill
"Take it easy" said Gordon helping Ash up
"Try and keep pressure on it" he added Ash did as she was told
Gordon and Ash made their way downstairs and towards the door
"What shoes do you want" asked Gordon
"My trainers, please" said Ash
"These" said Gordon holding a pair of trainers up
"Those aren't Ash's there Katie's" said Jill
"Well, they all look the same to me" said Gordon Ash and Jill laughed
"ouch" said Ash
"Don't make me laugh it hurts" added Ash
"Sorry" said Gordon
"Here let me, why don't you go on and get things ready, we'll catch you up" said Jill
"Yes, good idea" said Gordon, sometimes he felt so useless
"Here you go baby, left foot first" said Jill helping Ash into her shoes
"Right foot now" said Jill, Ash nearly fell over
"Carefully" said Jill
"Sorry" replied Ash
"Do, you need any help or anyone to go with you" asked Katie, both her and Jonathon had gotten changed
"It's up to Ash" said Jill
They all looked at Ash
"No, you had better not, dad will go mad if you don't do his list" said Ash
"Don't worry about dad he will understand" said Katie
"No, just do what he has asked, I don't want to cause more arguments" said Ash
"Right, lets get going" said Jill, having put her shoes on and picked up her bag
"See, you later" said Jill
"Bye mum, Ash" said Katie and Jonathon
"Where's Tom" asked Katie
"He, went back to bed when dad left" replied Jonathon
"Let's take a look at the list" said Jonathon wanting to take his mind off what had just happened
"I don't think I can concentrate on it" replied Katie
"I know what you mean, but it's what she wants" replied Jonathon
They looked for the list, but there wasn't one, Gordon had not done one in all the panic
"Dad, must not have done one in all the confusion" said Jonathon
"Perfect" said Katie
"What, do you mean" asked Jonathon
"If there is no list then we have done it, we can get the next bus and surprise them" said Katie
"What about dad" asked Jonathon
"If he asks, we are checking on Ash, and we came to get the list at the same time" replied Katie
"Okay, let's go" said Jonathon
They looked at the clock they had half an hour before it arrived
"We could always, have a quick tidy up, put the washing out and run the hoover around" said Jonathon
"Yeah, let's do that" said Katie
Katie put the washing out while Jonathon tidied their shoes and the mess in the front room that they had made, they were lucky their parents hadn't gone in there this morning, it was bad enough as it was, they only had time to hoover downstairs, but at least it was a start
"Shall, we get Tom" asked Jonathon
"No, he's made his choice, let him deal with dad later" said Katie
"Right, then let's go" said Jonathon, They walked down to the bus stop
"So, what do you think is wrong with Ash" asked Jonathon
"I don't know, but it cant be good, otherwise she would let us know" said Katie
"I don't know, I mean we have been pretty mean, we haven't spent a lot of time with her without mum or dad around" said Jonathon
"Yeah, they have kept her pretty close" said Katie
They got on the bus
"Maybe we should try to make it up to her" said Jonathon
"How" asked Katie
"I don't know, but I know someone who might" said Jonathon
"I suppose, we could always ask Mum" said Katie
"I was thinking more matron" said Jonathon
"But mum is as good" he added
"What ever it is we have to get it sorted today to do tomorrow" said Katie
"Yeah, that's if dad doesn't ground us" replied Jonathon
"We, will have to make sure he doesn't" replied Katie
"Are we going to include Tom" asked Jonathon
"Well, you know as well as I do that will all depend on Tom" replied Katie
Meanwhile at the Royal
"Right Ash, I'm just going to numb the area, so we can take a closer look" said Gordon
"Okay" replied Ash
Gordon injected the numbing agent
"You are doing really well baby" said Jill
"Okay, can you feel this" asked Gordon
"No" said Ash
"Good, right, now that it's numb, I'm just going to clean it up a little bit" said Gordon
"So, what we were talking about earlier, we have time now" said Jill
Ash knew, her mum couldn't rest until she knew
"Okay, so after I found you and Rob had come and I begged him to look after you, I went to get the bags, only there was a loud bang, and I turn around I'm on my own and trapped, there is this big beam blocking the way, then there is this creaking noise and I fall through the floor" said Ash
"Ohh, baby girl" said Jill, clearly upset
"I'm sorry" said Ash
"So, every time you hear a bang" started Gordon
"I'm back there, and I feel like I'm waiting to fall into the darkness" said Ash
"Right, Ash I'm going to have to put some more sutures in, try to keep still" said Gordon
"I know it sounds silly, when I say it aloud, it's just I can't stop thinking it" said Ash
"It's not silly at all, sometimes it sounds and smells that help bring back memories like that, that you had tried to stop because they are painful" said Jill
"So, how can I stop it, because I can't keep on like this" asked Ash
"That is something we are going to have to look into, just give us a little time" said Gordon
"But sometimes, talking is the best way" said Jill
"Right, that is you all patched up, you are going to have to take it easy for the next couple of days, it is going to be very tender" said Gordon
"Katie, Jonathon" said Ash, she had seen them through the doorway
"I thought they were supposed to be at home" said Jill
"I don't want them to see" said Ash, trying to grab her top to cover herself up
"Hey, what have we just said" replied Jill
"I'll go and see what they want" said Gordon
"Right young lady, let's sit you up, easy does it" said Jill
Gordon left Jill to get Ash dressed, while he took Jonathon and Katie to his office