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General trigger warnings for this story: Language, smut, mentions of rape, abuse, drug use/overdose, violence/death.
CHAPTER 25: FROSTED GLASS
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Sydney fidgeted in her seat as she tried to pull the hem of her cropped hoodie top down to cover her bulletproof vest as discreetly as possible while she watched in the side mirror as none other than David Hale approached her vehicle with a pep in his step.
"Miss... Harding, was it?" The deputy recalled with a smug raise of his brow as he leaned down into the window of the visibly angry woman who he had undoubtedly delayed from getting somewhere that she clearly had wanted to get quickly.
"Oh, Davy… You say that like I'm easy to forget. I'm a little offended." She mock-pouted with a hand over her heart, hoping that a little bit of flirting was all that it would take for errand boy to let her get on her way.
He chortled. "You in a hurry?" His blue eyes flicked back up to meet her pale green ones which were even more captivating under the enhancement of the sun.
"Why? You wanna take me out?" She asked playfully, dropping the facade when all she got in return was a discerning smirk. "I guess I'm just not used to the speed limits around here yet. You know - big city girl, small town." She shrugged. She had initially hoped to talk her way out of it, but now all she wanted was for him to give her the damn ticket so that she could make it there before shit went too far south.
"Well, something to learn about small towns is that we struggle to meet our quotas. Now that you're here, it seems we won't have a problem with that." He quipped with a wink, strolling back to his wagon to write her up.
Sydney's playful expression fell. She liked being challenged, but not when she was destined to lose. Bastard.
As Hale pulled up the newcomer's information for the speeding ticket, he noticed a flag on her file for two more traffic offenses from the week prior - scowling when he realized that they weren't automotive traffic offenses, but rather motorcycle ones. The crease in his forehead deepened as he began running through all the information he had on the mysterious woman: moved from San Bernardino, working at Teller-Morrow, cozying up with SAMCRO, committed multiple heinous traffic offenses in the same day, and now rode a motorcycle? A blurry picture was starting to form, but it was a blurry picture that he knew he wouldn't be able to clarify with the constant interference of SAMCRO and his corrupt superior. He unflagged her file, burying the lead to ensure that he would be the only one who possessed that precious intel - something was up with the blonde girl, and he was determined to find out what.
Sydney tapped her nails against the outside of her car door impatiently while waiting for the man who she was sure was taking his sweet time on purpose before finally he leisurely waltzed back up to her window.
"Drive safe." He told her as he passed her the folded up warning. "And I would recommend that you don't get any more tickets." His voice was firm as his jaw twitched under the pressure of his teeth being mashed together.
She hesitated before she realized what he was getting. grinning at as she put her car into gear and drove off - even with the dumb haircut and big ears, he wasn't as stupid as he looked.
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Clay, Tig, and Half-Sack started to worry as they continued shredding up the highway - as they had been doing for over thirty minutes - and there was still no sign of Sydney. As much as they wanted to avoid the thought - they all worried in the back of their minds that maybe the Nevada Mayans had informed their California hermanos of their updated standing with the Sons.
Sydney sighed in relief when she spotted the familiar eyes of the reaper staring back at her from up ahead, leaning forward and propelling herself toward them. As soon as she had gotten home and had been able to make sure that she hadn't been tailed, she'd stuffed her glock into her waistband and jumped out of the car - bolting to her garage from where she'd parked on the street. She hadn't even bothered with a change of clothes - throwing a black riding jacket over the bulky layers that she'd already been adorned with before firing up her Ninja, yanking her helmet over her head, and praying that she wouldn't lay down her bike and scar up her bare legs in the time sensitive mission.
"Should I ride up?" She flipped her visor up, yelling as she pulled in between Clay and Half-Sack - her voice carrying over the roaring machines as they soared across the pavement.
Tig felt his ears beginning to ring as everything rushed back to him - everything from the memory that he had spent years running from, just for a similar scenario to present itself: high speed, a bike, the highway, the woman he loved… And this time, there was a threat present.
"Go-"
"No!" Tig yelled at the same time as his President, his eyes widening slightly when he realized what he'd done.
Clay glared at the dark haired man, silently reminding him that no matter whose dick she sucked - she obeyed the orders of the President, not the Sergeant. "They shouldn't be too far." He nodded up the highway.
Sydney's nerves shorted out when Tig answered in place of their President - and with the wrong answer at that. She exhaled a cleansing breath as she willed herself to brush it off, hoping that it was just a one time slip up in the heat of the moment. The last thing that she needed was Tig starting to get protective, and the second last thing that she needed was their relationship to land on Clay's radar and potentially jeopardize her seat at the table.
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Jax and Bobby raced down the empty highway as the chase continued. Even though bullets were flying and lives were at risk - Jax was pleased with the decision that he'd made. If the Nevada Mayans were willing to chase two lone reapers for this long, he could only imagine what they would do to Jury and the rest of Indian Hills. Now that the bait was set, he would be able to help them clear the threat. And his satisfaction only grew when he saw his backup arriving as Clay, Tig, and Half-Sack - who had somehow managed to borrow a bike - cutting across the dirt median that divided the two directions of traffic to join their convoy.
Clay snarled in frustration when Sydney drove right past their target. He thought about chasing after her, but decided against it - he couldn't focus on whatever second thoughts she'd let spook her, he had a crew to bring home safely.
"How the hell do we wanna handle this?" Jax yelled to Clay as he pulled up alongside his President. Before Clay could answer, he was startled by the sound of rapid fire behind him.
Tig pulled out his Jericho and turned around to begin firing off retaliation shots, but froze with his finger on the trigger - a crease forming above his brow when he realized that the gunfire wasn't coming from the Mayans.
Clay whipped his head around in frustration when Tig didn't fire back, wondering what the fuck had gotten into his Sergeant today - but he soon realized that he wasn't firing back because there was no need to.
Sydney swerved around the fallen Mayans with her glock in hand and a wicked grin on her face underneath the tinted visor of her helmet. She had managed to successfully shoot out one of each of the enemy's tires, bringing them to the ground and ending the chase without spilling blood - something she hoped would earn points with her VP because it definitely hadn't been her first choice.
Glee spread across the faces of the men once they realized what'd happened, honking their horns in cheer as Sydney sped past them and led them home. "So much for 'low profile'!" Bobby yelled to his brothers with a hearty chuckle.
Sydney reached the compound with the rescued Sons in tow, parking her bike along the rail where she killed her engine and lifted her helmet off of her head before she was immediately scooped into Tig's arms.
"That was so fucking sexy." He growled, carnal need inhabiting every cell of his body for the extraordinary woman before him.
She laughed as he spun her around, feeling the warmth of his neck beneath her palms before curling her delicate fingers into his hair with a grin that he copied, looking up at her with awestruck eyes before pulling her towards his lips.
Clay sat against the seat of his bike as he waited for the makeout session to die down, his lips pursing together harder and harder together with each second that passed when it didn't.
The entangled pair was startled by a loud honking, whipping their heads in the direction of the offending noise to see Clay wailing on his horn. "Think the rest of us can thank our Princess?" He asked with a sly grin.
Tig chuckled nervously before setting Sydney back down to the pavement. "Wanna talk some more shit about my Ninja?" The cocky blonde bragged the second that her feet were on the ground. "They didn't have a fucking clue that I was with you guys.
"You been holdin onto that?" Clay chuckled.
"Sure have." She nodded with a smug smile.
"You did good." He nodded. "And you make the vest look good." He added with a wink.
"I'd make a kutte look better." She quipped with a smirk.
"I never thought I'd be saved by a slanter in short-shorts." Jax grinned as he threw his arm around the shoulders of his unlikely hero.
Sydney smiled, accepting whatever praise that she could get from the VP, which reminded her… "Y'aint got anything to say about how I took down their whole crew without spilling blood? You know, the Jackson Teller way." She mused.
Jax responded with a discerning smirk before he caught the warning glare that he was getting from Tig when his arm lingered around her shoulders, pulling away smugly.
"Get everyone here, you can fill us in." Clay's disappointment towards Jax quickly resurfaced as he turned toward the clubhouse.
Jax bit the inside of his cheek - knowing that his angry stepfather was already onto him and that he would have to come up with a damn good explanation if he wanted to get his way. "Let surrounding charters know." The VP clapped Tig on the shoulder, successfully busying the Sergeant so that he could get some face time with the one person that he knew could help him. The question now was if she would or not…
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Tig was seated on top of a picnic table with his elbow resting on his knee and his hand propped under his chin. He squinted in the bright afternoon sun, holding the burner to his ear as he informed all surrounding charters of the recent breakthrough with the Mayans so that they could err on the side of caution with their Mexican rivals. He felt his heartbeat pick up, taking a few seconds to register the cause as his brain tried to comprehend the sight of Sydney emerging from the clubhouse after shedding her heavy bulletproof vest and riding jacket. She walked past him with a wink, swinging those perfect hips back and forth - eventually arriving at his bike where she bent right over it, giving him a show as she rifled through the saddlebag.
"Hey, baby." The curly haired man blinked a few times, snapping out of his daydream to see that she was now standing in front of him, smoothing her hands up his thighs. "Have you seen my sunglasses?"
"Nah." He answered quickly, pulling his eyes away from where she was dangling herself in front of him - not letting himself subscribe to the ideas that he knew she was trying to plant in his mind.
"You wanna come help me find em?" She sing-songed as she tilted her head with crazy eyes and a suggestive smirk, leaning her full weight onto her hands that rested on his lap.
"You know I'm busy babe..." He whined with a grimace, hoping that she would have some mercy on him when she knew full well just how riled up he already was.
"Okay..." She relented, letting her expression fall to a pout as she turned away from him.
"Hey." His large hand swallowed her bicep as he pulled her back to him. "Later." He raised his brows and narrowed his eyes.
"Sure." She replied quickly with a nod.
His jaw clenched as the mock-understanding in her tone let him know that she intended to make him pay for this, grinding his teeth as he pulled his gaze from her to return to his task, only for it to be pulled right back as she waltzed over to his bike and laid back against the seat and kicking her feet up.
"Hey Princess, you c'mere for a sec? Need to make an order." Jax nodded from the doorway of the office, stopping her from lighting the joint she'd intended to smoke while soaking up some sun in an attempt to calm the adrenaline she was still harboring.
Tig snarled when she perked up at Jax's request, the sight only adding to his frustration when the exact man drooling over his woman was the same one who had busied him to the point where he couldn't properly take care of her.
"What d'you need to ord-" Sydney's question was cut off as Jax came out from behind the open door and attempted to shut it before she stopped it with her boot.
"If you close that door you are going to have a very angry Sergeant on your hands." She mused with a slow shake of her head. "And I'm guessing that you've already got those hands full..."
"I need your help." Jax shook his head, wiping the 'deer in the headlights' look off of his face.
Sydney's amusement quickly faded as she made her way across the office, shaking her head and sinking into the chair. "You fucking provoked them, didn't you?" She exhaled with her head down.
"You don't understand-"
"You have a very small window of time to make me understand." Her sharp statements and clenched jaw had Jax thinking that perhaps he had bitten off more than he could chew in thinking that the aspiring Son would be on his side.
"Jury was my dad's best friend." He pleaded with the angry woman. "Clay slapped a reaper over their backs out of nowhere - he lost half his club and if I didn't do something to get him protection, he was gonna lose the other half."
"Old history doesn't mean you can go behind the club's back. Did you think any further than the one thing you wanted to accomplish?" He winced as she began spitting the harsh truths at him. "What if Bobby died? What if they went and torched Jury's clubhouse, just like they did the warehouse? What if they called up Alvarez and ordered a hit on your mother? On Tara? On your fucking child, Jackson!" She slammed her hand down on the desk. "These are things you have to think about."
"You really do deserve a spot at that table." He chuckled humorlessly. If there was anything he had learned about her - it was that flattery was his best bet, and they didn't call him Prince Charming for nothing.
"Why are you putting this burden on me?" She growled. "I don't want to know your secrets." Knowing Jax's secrets meant that she would have to either betray him, or the club - and there was no way that she would choose the latter.
"I just need you to back me." He sighed. "Clay won't listen to me right now, his head is too clouded with all this bullshit." He shook his head.
" His head is too clouded?" She barked out a laugh.
Jax clenched his jaw when she laughed in his face, his patience running out and his anger building towards the cocky little girl on the other side of the desk.
Sydney raised a brow and narrowed her eyes in challenge at his change of expression, shocked by the audacity of the man who was practically begging at her feet. "You want my help? You better pack away that big boy temper." She sneered as she began rising to her feet, slowly leaning across the desk. "If you can pull your head out of your ass long enough to tell me exactly what it is that you need me to do, real nicely?" She cocked her head. "Maybe I'll consider it."
"You help me, I'll help you get patched." The Vice President stared back into the smoky green gaze that never faltered, matching her intensity.
Sydney was taken aback by his proposal. Yes - she wanted to get patched, and she would be lying if she denied that she considered it for a second, but she wanted to get patched the right way, for the right reason. "You tryin to bribe me now?" She squinted in offense.
"The club needs people who think smart and quick like you do." His head shook with sincerity.
Sydney ran her tongue under her top lip, not letting up on her harsh expression as she pondered the true depth of his words. "I'm not lying for you." She put her terms in place.
"I don't need you to, just back whatever I say to Clay."
She turned to leave, saying nothing - deciding that she would see how things played out at church before she made any commitments. "Bring me a beer. You ruined my mood." She called behind her, bringing a smirk to Jax's face as she passed through the door.
Tig watched Sydney emerge from the office looking significantly less eager than she did when she'd entered, which helped the twinge of jealousy in the back of his mind. What happened next though, had his eyes bugging out of his head as he watched his old lady strip her top off for not the first, but the second time today - retaking her stretched out position over his bike, only adding insult to injury.
Jax was surprised when he returned from the bar to see Sydney laid out on Tig's bike once again - and with her shirt off this time. He smirked, she must really be going for a reaction.. .
"You're already on his radar, I'd suggest you stop staring." She deadpanned without opening her eyes, reaching out her hand to receive her requested beverage. Jax snorted, handing off the cold bottle and sauntering back to the garage.
The next thirty minutes of the soothing rays, cold beer, and soundtrack of members trickling in on their Harleys had successfully calmed Sydney down after the exciting chase - and the bogus request of her VP.
"Think she's got like, magic pussy?" Juice asked Bobby as they gazed upon Sydney defiling Tig's bike while he glared at her from across the compound.
"She's gotta have somethin magic to whip him." Bobby surmised with wide eyes and raised brows.
Sydney smirked when a shadow cast over her, knowing that it was Tig even as her eyes remained closed behind the dark lenses of her aviators. "Just the other day you wanted me to wash your bike in a bikini..." She reminded him, flinching when he ghosted a fingertip across her collarbone, down her cleavage, and over her belly button.
"Yeah..." Tig answered disapprovingly.
"Church!" Clay barked from the clubhouse, providing a distraction that Sydney was thankful for. She swung her legs down off the handlebars, sitting up and shaking her hair out before pulling the distressed top back over the black lace of her bralette.
"Come on, Tiggy." She eagerly held her hand out to the distraught man who took it haphazardly.
Once they entered the chapel, Sydney took the liberty of sitting in Chibs' usual seat - which just happened to be right next to Tig, brushing her fingers over his thigh.
Clay, Jax, Juice, and Bobby all took their respective seats, but Sydney saw that a new face was sitting at the table today as Half-Sack walked in, getting a nod from the President and sitting in front of the reaper for the first time. She grinned at her friend, sharing in his excitement for the significant moment.
Clay looked to Jax expectantly as he waited for an explanation, the VP immediately shaking his head in an attempt to display his innocence. "They were waitin for us man, stopped to take a piss just over the border and they ambushed us."
Sydney struggled to withhold the urge to roll her eyes at Jax's horrible delivery of what would've been a half decent lie. She channeled the restlessness elsewhere, hoistering her jittery legs over Tig's lap - taking full advantage of Chibs' absence.
Clay looked to Bobby for confirmation but he stayed silent with his lips pursed - a reaction that did not satisfy the club's President. "You promised this would be under the radar! Now I got Mayan beef beyond the borders to worry about when our customer base is already shaky to begin with?"
"We need a bigger presence in Nevada if this is gonna work out." Jax shrugged, effectively sending any effort that Sydney had conjured up to help out the window with extreme force as he made absolutely no attempt to try and hide what his true intentions had been from the beginning.
"I barely had enough manpower to come escort your asses home and you want me to send help to another charter? Indian Hills needs to learn to protect themselves!"
Jax looked to Sydney, silently begging her before continuing to plead his case. "They need our help or there aint gonna be an Indian Hills!" The VP raised his voice considerably in frustration when his green eyed insurance policy seemingly fell through.
"Vegas." Sydney stated - if she was going to get Jax what he wanted, she was going to do it her way.
"What?" Clay shook his head in confusion.
"Have Vegas head to Indian Hills for back up until we can gather a group big enough to head out and pitch the guns. When we get up there, we let them know that they'll be fending for themselves from then on, and that the only way they'll be able to do that is with our guns. Jack up the price since they don't know any better, lower it back down to our usual profit after a year - let them think they're getting a deal from their charitable brothers."
Even though the solution benefitted Clay, he still gave Jax a menacing glance - knowing that he had done something to push them to this conclusion. "Send them up." He ordered Juice.
"What about Mayan retaliation?" Tig asked.
"Yeah, I bet them wetbacks are all thirsty for blood after your little stunt today." Bobby looked to Sydney.
"Excuse me?" The words bellowed from deep in her chest as she dropped any precious patience that she'd managed to get her hands on. "' My little stunt' ?" She spat with a sour expression, swinging her legs down from their propped up position across Tig's lap.
Clay squeezed his eyes shut and exhaled sharply through his nose while Jax and Bobby both sat back, bracing themselves for what they had just provoked. Half-Sack pushed his chair back slowly as Sydney grew angrier and angrier while Tig squeezed her thigh in an attempt to calm her down.
"'My little stunt', saved your asses today. 'My little stunt', was to get you out of whatever the fuck you stirred up in Nevada!" She waved her hands about as Tig's ring adorned hand kept her in her seat. "You want me to throw you to the wolves next time? Leave you lying dead in a ditch? I will."
"Alright, alright." Clay sighed. "Princess' got a point." He nodded, glaring at the occupants to his left. "It don't look like we got much to worry about but just in case, I want you on guard, and you on the compound." He pointed to Tig, then to Sydney. "And when I say guard, I mean guard . No pussy." He looked between the couple like a cop scolding a pair of teenagers caught making out in a car.
Sydney smirked as more ideas came to her mind about how she could torture Tig throughout the night if he had direct orders not to touch her. Tig took the opposite approach, making to whine in protest but deciding against it when he saw the warning gaze from his President - the same warning gaze that he'd already earned himself once today - hanging his head and nodding his confirmation.
"We gonna talk about that $200k?" Juice floated the idea cautiously, knowing that they were on a time crunch to come up with the cash.
"Not now." Clay shook his head as it rested in his hands, not wanting to worry about the hefty debt while he had so many other things weighing on his mind that he clearly couldn't offload onto his VP - as he should've been able to. "Start thinking up ideas, pulling together what we have. We'll discuss it tomorrow."
Tig hurried out of the chapel to begin stockpiling the weapons around the clubhouse while Clay and Bobby quickly filed out as well, hoping to avoid Sydney's wrath.
"What the hell was that?" Jax sneered quietly once the two blondes were alone, his face twitching as he seethed. "Threatening and blackmailing them wasn't part of our deal."
"You should've been more clear with your terms." Her lips curled up as she crossed her arms over her chest.
"This is bullshi-"
She took a step forward, then another, then another - not stopping until she was just inches away from him. "You would be sitting pretty with shit all if it wasn't for me, so the only words that I should be hearing from your mouth are 'thank' and 'you'." He stared stoically, holding his ground as she got in his face. "It's the power of negotiation Jaxy - it would do you some good to learn it, especially if you want to be President one day." Her eyes narrowed before she backed away.
Tig dropped an armload of various guns from the security surplus onto the pool table when Jax stormed out of the chapel, shoving the clubhouse door open and kicking it shut behind him. The confused Sergeant turned toward the chapel with a scowl as Sydney emerged with a smirk. "The hell was that about?" He questioned with a raised brow, wondering why his old lady whispering in the shadows with Jax was something that he'd now seen multiple times today.
"The Prince aint too happy about my idea to threaten Indian Hills." She answered as she stared at the door, rubbing his shoulder reassuringly before hopping up onto the pool table. "Looks like that means we got the clubhouse all to ourselves tonight." She mused suggestively.
"You heard what-" Tig began, stuttering regrettably as he shook his head, unable to believe what was about to come out of his mouth. "You heard what Clay said, no pussy." He tried to say with as much conviction as possible.
"Who said anything about pussy?" She tilted her head to the side, feigning confusion - letting Tig know that he was in for a night full of temptation.
Tig stared her down with a hint of warning in his blue gaze - determined to wipe the smug look off of that pretty face, but all he got was a smile as she beamed back at him, making him jerk his eyes away and return his attention to the pile of iron in front of him.
Sydney's lips curled up when he cowered under her gaze, reminding her of the days not long ago where neither of them would give into the pressure - which was going to be the theme of her game tonight.
"Alright, well-" She jumped down and began her strut to the door. "If I'm quarantined here for the night, I'm going home to get supplies."
"Woah woah." He grabbed her elbow, pulling her back. "Nah, you stay put." He narrowed his eyes as he looked down on her, shaking his head.
"You really think I can't handle mysel-"
"You wanna be a good old lady?" He cut off the beginning of her smug protest, pressing a hand to her chest as he began walking her backwards, her face falling as his carefully chosen words placed a seriousness on the encounter that she hadn't expected. " Good old ladies do as they're told. Good old ladies don't tease other men." Her back hit the edge of the bar right as the fierce words left his mouth, his eyes burning holes into her as he reminded her of her place verbally since he couldn't do it physically. "Good old ladies don't disrespect their old man's ride." The fire returned to her eyes when he finished off strong. "Surely your daddy taught you that?" He squinted.
"Maybe my daddy needs to teach me." She rasped with the same challenging squint.
Tig let out a dark chuckle at her clever response, pulling away. "You aint leavin." He scolded, walking back to the pool table to finish his original task.
"You gonna keep me entertained?" She crossed her arms, huffing in frustration.
"We'll see. Drop the attitude." He dismissed her, smirking discreetly when he heard her stomping away.
Sydney stormed down the hallway, slamming the door to his room where she ripped her clothes off - pulling one of his t-shirts over her naked form before walking back out to the bar.
Tig looked up from the guns when he heard her footsteps, much quieter now than they had been earlier - his eyes trailing down her form that was clothed in nothing but his shirt to see that she was barefoot. "What the hell are you wearing?" He raised a brow.
Sydney bit the inside of her cheek to try and contain the laugh that she was fighting as he grew more and more annoyed."A shirt?"
"And?" He motioned to her clearly bare lower half where the black S.O.A. monogrammed shirt barely covered her ass.
"Well you won't let me leave, so I have to improvise." She shrugged.
"You have stuff in my dresser." He shook his head as she began sauntering up to him, swaying her body slowly with every step.
"I told you the other day that I needed to bring more..." She countered with a pout. "And this is comfy, baby." She widened her eyes as she rounded the pool table, looking up at him innocently.
"God, you are such a pain in my ass." He growled playfully, lifting her to sit on the table while he sorted through the various weapons.
"I'm just keeping you on your toes." She smirked as she leant back, pressing her foot to his chest.
Tig looked down at the blood red toenails against the leather of his kutte, his eyes trailing down to where she was spread in front of him: pantiless. He quickly snapped her legs shut, not allowing his mind to even begin on the path where she wanted it. "What if someone shows up, huh? Then what?" He nodded to her naked lower half.
"Well then I guess that would mean that you're doing a shitty job keeping guard." She smirked as he chuckled. "Why don't you just set up a tripwire? That way you don't even have to pay attention to what might be going on out there, and you can focus on what's really going on right here." She spoke with a rasp as she spread her legs slowly.
"Jax might come back." He kept his eyes averted.
"Would that really be the worst thing?" She snorted, hopping off the table to grab a drink when she realized that he wasn't giving in.
Tig's forehead creased when she spoke ill of Jax, reigniting the curiosity that he'd had earlier. "What was he talking to you about?" He followed her over to the table that she and her bottle of Jack had claimed. "When I was on the phone.
"Needed help ordering a specialty part for that old Roadster - didn't have the code." She spoke casually as she twisted the cap off of the bottle and rested her bare legs on the table top, leaning back and fiddling with her necklace.
"You're not tellin me somethin." Tig hadn't lied at the beach when he'd told her that he'd learned her body language. He knew by the way that she flicked the gold chain around, that she wasn't being honest with him.
"You sayin I'm a liar?" She challenged with a raised brow.
"Bold move for someone who's blatantly lying." Tig scoffed - catching himself quickly as he reigned in his temper. "I'm saying that I don't want secrets between us." He surprised himself by the patience that he had with the mouthy woman, a tender explanation being the last thing that anyone - including himself - would've expected in that moment.
Sydney took a deep breath, feeling the guilt punching her in the stomach. "There are things that I can't tell you, and I know there are things you can't tell me. Let's just agree to turn a blind eye." She finally understood why relationships in this life only seemed to work when old ladies took the 'ignorance is bliss' approach - but she needed it to go both ways.
"I don't wanna be lied to by the woman I love." Tig shook his head honestly. He had been through the ringer when it came to the toll that lying took in relationships. He had only ever lied to his exes about things regarding the club, but Colleen had taken the sin and ran to the hills with it - using it as an excuse to cheat, drink, and poison the minds of their daughters. Sydney was his last chance to do things right - the first and only woman that he didn't have to lie to.
"You think that love equals transparency?" She scoffed. "I think you'd still be married if that was the case." She mused playfully.
"I wouldn't go that far." He chuckled half heartedly.
She returned the meaningless smile, thinking on the words that she'd spoken; transparency - the one thing that Gemma had told her she needed to keep the spot in Tig's heart. She felt a bitter hatred bubbling behind her belly button as she thought back to her days in San Bernardino when the club would only tell her what she needed to know - and only if it benefited them. It was a hatred that she never wanted to reflect on again, and maybe Tig was the key to that. Maybe ignorance wasn't the only way that this worked - maybe Gemma was right, maybe transparency with a man willing to see through her was. Of course there would be times where transparency wasn't an option - secrets and denial were how she survived in this life as a woman, but those tactics would only do the opposite in a relationship. Sticking to her comfort zone wouldn't work if the situations that she continued to place herself in resided elsewhere. If she really wanted to be with Tig, she had to make the effort.
"If I'm gonna be transparent with you, it has to go both ways." She met his eyes with a soft, emerald gaze.
"I never thought I could be transparent with someone, before I met you." Tig nodded, his eyes falling to the wood grain on the table.
"He provoked the Mayans - insists on getting Jury protection and thought I could help sway the club in his favor."
"Why would he go to you?" He scowled bitterly.
"Knows I'm persuasive, I guess." She forced a chuckle as she tried to ignore the accusation in his tone in an attempt to lighten the dreary conversation.
"You are persuasive." He grinned suggestively, glad that she hadn't gone on the defense over his temporary, insecurity-fueled slip.
"Not persuasive enough, apparently." She scoffed. "I'm not sure what's going on with him, but I know it's bad for the club. The closer I get to him, the better I can protect us."
"It aint your job to protect us, you're not a member." Tig hadn't meant to put his foot in his mouth as he blindly reacted to the irrational worry that her statement provoked, but if it kept her away from Jax - and from putting her life at risk for him - he could live with it.
"I don't give a shit what my job is. The club is family, they protect their own." She snapped, unable to ignore the sting of his words this time.
"He doesn't wanna rebuild." He used the valuable piece of information to change the subject.
"What?" Sydney wasn't exactly surprised , this had been her suspicion all along - but what she was surprised by, was his confirmation.
"Fourth of July party - suggested we take the money and put it into somethin else."
"Jesus Christ…" She shook her head. "Do you think it's just a phase? Some kind of identity crisis now that he has Abel?"
"He aint a teenager, Syd - he's a grown man."
"Could've fooled me." She snorted.
"I don't know what the right move is, but he worries the shit out of me." He nodded earnestly.
"What does Clay think?" Sydney knew that Jax had set up a permanent residence on Clay's radar, but she wondered if he'd confided in his Sergeant with his concerns, more than he had her.
"I think he hopes it'll pass, but... I wasn't kidding when I said that crossing Clay wasn't something that you want to do." He stared at her hard - trying to tell her with his eyes, what he couldn't with his words.
"Then what was that shit today on the escort?" She questioned with a hint of playfulness in her voice that went completely ignored.
"You could've been hurt." He shook his head bitterly as she brought up the incident that he kept trying to forget.
Normally, Sydney would've spouted off something about how everything she did in this life could get her hurt. But Tig had always known that - had always been okay with that, ever since… "Does this have anything to do with what happened in Santa Cru-"
"No." Tig cut her off, knowing that if he even thought about entertaining her theory, he would snap. "I don't wanna see you lying on the side of the highway." He finished with as much of the truth as he could will himself to give, standing from his chair and swiping the bottle from her hands - guzzling down the numbing liquid in an attempt to silence the thoughts before they could start.
Sydney let her eyes fall closed when he wouldn't give her the truth, even after he was the one who had said that he wanted transparency. She took a deep breath before pushing her chair back, the wood scraping loudly against the waxed floors of the bar.
"It's like I said." Her voice got his attention from across the room. "There are things that we can't tell eachother." She nodded softly before disappearing down the hallway.
;
