Hi again all! Sorry for the wait. I had a little writers block up I'm back. And I've already seen Civil War twice. How great is it! Bucky made me so sad. Which reminds me (great segway) that his chapter got me a little teary but that my just be how tired I currently am. Please tell me your reactions, I'd love to hear them.

Chapter 31

"Sorry about the clouds Cap," Clint sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked up at the covered sky.

Steve didn't show any sign of hearing him as stood in front of a marble stone slab that was neatly engraved in elegant letters:

Annie Rogers

Let love and faithfulness never leave you.

Write them on the tablet of your heart.

Proverbs 3:3 NIV

He gently lent down to softly place a bouquet of white snow bells in front of the grave stone. Steve had searched for hours before finding a bouquet of Annie's favourite flowers, not commonly used in floristry. The florist had been hesitant about making a bouquet out of only the lanky flowers but a heartfelt request from Captain America had convinced them in the end.

He pulled himself back up but was reluctant to stray too far from the symbolic resting place of his late sister. Finally turning to Hawkeye he responded, "It's okay Clint. Annie liked the clouds anyway. She used to say the sky seemed bare without them filling it up. She had been 12 when she said it though."

He had chosen a nice spot. A vast tree spread its leaves over the row of graves and the green grass around the stone sprouted with little yellow flowers. Annie would have liked it.

"Not to be rude or anything but is this all the people who showed up. I thought Annie was supposed to be the normal, friendly one," Clint spat, making no attempt to hide his distaste at the lack of company with crossed arms. Natasha jabbed him in the exposed part of his ribs earning a pained grunt from the marksman. He seemed more irritated than upset about the situation but Steve supposed they all dealt with loss differently. Steve was reasonably sure he had gone through all the stages of loss. His anger had settled after Widow and Sam set him straight and now he just painfully felt her absence.

"No these are all the people I invited," Steve explained glancing at Sharon Carter who was still to the left. The notification of Annie's funeral had been awkward with Sharon but she had gotten on along quite well with Annie when they had been neighbours and deserved the chance to say goodbye. The attendance also consisted of Natasha, Clint, Falcon and himself. All respectively dressed they stood stationary around the grave.

"Annie never really had a lot of friends. I guess it started because I was always too sick to keep up with the other kids so Annie stayed back with me. We were each other's best friend and then Bucky joined. I think Annie thought the two of us idiots were enough and never really made any other close friends until she met Peggy."

It was difficult for the others to remember that Steve had once been quite sickly having never known him when he was.

"Annie wouldn't have wanted a large funeral. She would have just wanted the people she cared about here."

Steve let out a deep breath as his shoulders sagged. Seeing her grave stone made her death real. He had put off the event up until this point foolishly hoping it was another one of HYDRA's schemes but in all of their HYDRA raids not one person had mentioned Annie. Natasha said he needed to do this for closure but he wasn't sure he wanted it. If he accepted that Annie was really gone then he would really be alone. Everyone would see him as Captain America first, Steve second. He was sure she and Bucky had been the only ones that preferred Steve to the historic hero. Now he wasn't sure that Bucky liked or remembered any version of him.

To be honest Steve was terrified. He didn't know what to do without his sister. She had provided him an anchor when the whole world refused to make sense. She had given him comfort, companionship and most importantly understanding. She had been the only constant in the radical events of his life.

He hated coming home now. The empty silence of the apartment a painful reminder of his loss. He would enter through the green door and instantly notice the absence of humming and the jumble of mix-matched herbs as Annie attempted to spice up her bland food. The house had now fallen into clutter, Steve hoping the mess could stop everything from reminding him of when she'd been alive. Natasha had come over and tided up the house with a certain level of inexperience. She cooked him a homemade meal, demanding he have a normal dinner. Despite the flawed cleaning, the meal was perfectly cooked with all the herbs pleasantly balanced.

He hated it.

It wasn't hers and he couldn't pretend it was for a moment of comfort.

He had thanked her as he was always did and when she left the emptiness returned.

Now that he was staring at the smoothed stone that read her name in past tense he didn't know what to feel. He had felt so much anger, fear, sadness and guilt in the past weeks that he felt drained.

Steve was surprised when Natasha spoke up in the most nostalgic tone he had heard from the reserved woman. "Annie was the first person in a long time that had wanted my company more than my skills. I was sure that she had ulterior motives. She knew who I was and what I had done, thanks to Clint," She sent a little glare to the embarrassed looking archer, "And she still wanted to get to know me more. Annie is one of the rare people in the world that see us for who we are, good or bad and not what we can offer. For some of us it's a shock but it's what we need."

Steve noticed Natasha continue to focus on maintaining her steely expression but it broke as she looked to the grave. As if Annie were standing where the stone penetrated the ground Natasha looked to it warmly. The woman uncomfortable with feelings, smiled weakly and with an uncertain tug of her shoulders uttered a "Thank you."

Steve supposed it was his turn to speak yet he struggled to find where to begin. He searched his mind for how best to sum up Annie for his unprepared eulogy. As he searched he came to a realisation, "There isn't a long list of inspirational moments with Annie. Anyone with a few well-placed words can motivate but Annie… Annie was there. She was there believing in us, loving us and accepting us when there was no reason for her to." Steve had hoped his shoulders and voice remained strong but both had softened in recalling the woman with ridiculously tangled hair.

This wasn't supposed a speech. This was him saying goodbye to his sister who repeatedly sacrificed her own happiness for his. His sister who he could never truly thank. As he spoke again he didn't steel his voice or harden his face but let his friends see him as he truly was, grateful and yet completely lost.

"When I was younger I was sick a lot. I would have to stay in bed for weeks sometimes. I would cough and wheeze so much it would drive anyone insane. But every time I got sick Annie would refuse to go to school and stay with me the whole time. She would sing until I fell asleep and would always be there when I woke up. I was her big brother but she was the one looking after me. From that I knew I could depend on her through anything and I wanted her to be able to depend on me. I guess I failed." His head hung and he had no motivation to lift it.

No one spoke after that. What needed to be said had been said and what couldn't had been buried down. Gradually they left, giving a last glance at the stone grave and a reassuring pat on Steve's shoulder. Natasha was the last to give him a sad smile before returning to her car, leaving him alone.

He was unsure how long he stood staring at the stone as if it would change something. Eventually he took the last six steps to the grave stone and laid his palm on the cold marble. "Annie, I'm going to find Bucky. You're not here anymore but I can still help him. I'm not going to fail him like I failed you. I promise", Steve vowed to stone.

At the homestead the following two weeks pasted with only a few incidences much to Annie's relief. Bucky continued to remain alert when in company that expended beyond just him and Annie. He also continued to insist on having her in sight. The two continued to share Annie's room both finding comfort in the presence of the other. Annie almost every morning without fail found her body tightly wrapped around Bucky. Bucky was unaware of this fact because as much as he hated it, he was not a morning person. And Annie most definitely was according to Bucky's standards. This is the cause of the first incident.

Bucky woke as he usually did, alone in a warm bed not remembering when he had fallen asleep. He frowned looking at the spot Annie usually occupied. He wished for once that she would still be there when he woke. He dragged himself out of bed and travelled through the now familiar house to the kitchen that Annie usually occupied at this time. Annie was not the best cook but she really loved breakfast. A pang of worry shot through him when he heard no singing or humming or even whistling. The pang turning into the frenzy of anxiety when he found the kitchen empty and unused. "Annie?!" he yelled anxiously once again searching the room and those adjoining it. The only out-of-place items were a plate of lukewarm pancakes and a piece of folded paper. His eyes darted around the room for any signs of HYDRA, very conscious of the gun that was tucked into his belt and hidden by his shirt.

Bucky cautiously tread to the paper hoping to whatever powerful being that would hear him that it was not another letter from HYDRA. He relaxed slightly seeing his name in Annie's handwriting.

He was able to slow himself down enough to read the cursive, 'Bucky. I have not been taken by HYDRA. Calm down. I just went with Laura about 20 minutes down the road to get some groceries. We will be back before 11:30. Please eat some pancakes.' –Annie

Bucky looked to the painted wooden clock that hung on the wall, 10:40am. He still had almost an hour until they returned. He then sheepishly noticed that in his panic he had completely crushed the corner of the stone bench with his metal hand.

He spent the rest of the time waiting on the front stairs grumpily eating the now cold pancakes. He had not been happy when the two woman pulled up in the dirtied grey car but brought in the groceries none the less. Laura was also not happy with the destruction of her pristine counter.

The second incident was of the more serious kind. As Bucky had taken to following Annie around the homestead so had another. Lila Barton as most young girls would be was intrigued by the interesting and strange new occupants of her home. Shy at first, Lila had slowly grown bold enough to approach the curious woman with the long golden curls that she had been dying to play with. To her delight Annie, though slightly awkward at first, was more than willing to participate in her games. She had coerced the young woman into a tirade of games and pretend. Bucky was happy to simply watch Lila tug on Annie's hand, instructing her on the rules of her latest game.

Annie grew confident in the world of pretend under Lila's assertive guidance. The roles also reversed as Lila insisted on helping Annie with the washing. More than once Laura spotted the blonde carrying a basket of damp clothing followed by Bucky who held another and little Lila who marched happily behind with the little bucket of pegs. The incident occurred in one of the rare moments that Bucky was separated from Annie. Lila had challenged the (biologically) 25 year old woman to tag by poking her arm as she sat with Bucky, branding her as "it".

The young girl with two bouncing plaits ran from the two in a fit of giggles. Bucky rolled his eyes as Annie leapt from her sit to chase after Lila. Annie chased after the young girl who clumsily crawled under the table and popped up on the other side using it as a barrier between her and Annie. Both darted side to side in an intimidation game, the constant laughter of the small girl clearly wearing her out. A wicked grin grew on Annie's face knowing she simply had to play the long game. She choose one side of the table to run around, Lila choosing the opposing side. The two chased from room to room until Lila lost her pursuer. The giggles faded as she searched the last room she had run through, her twin plaits swinging with every side glance. Before the young girl knew it two feminine arms wrapped tightly around her torso and she was lifted up.

She had fallen into Annie's trap. Her own laughter mixed with the surprised squeals resonating from the gap-toothed mouth of Lila. "Get go!" Lila continued to squeal at a deafening volume.

The light hearted atmosphere dropped as abruptly as Bucky entered the room with wild eyes and a gun held ready in his outstretched arms. Annie could feel Lila stiffen like lead in her arms. The young girl knew what it was. Annie, careful not to spook Bucky, slowly lowered and released Lila, quietly telling her to go to her mother.

Bucky's gun stayed trained on her but his alert eyes followed Lila's panicked exit. As Annie took a hesitant step towards Bucky his eyes were instantly trained on her once again, the gun unsteady in his grip. Annie's eyebrows bunched together at his frenzied eyes and shallow breath. It was just like his nightmares, perceiving a different time and place than the one before him.

She took another step towards him calmly calling, "Bucky."

She noticed his entire body tense at the movement. He hurriedly cocked the gun warning in a shaky voice, "Don't come any closer." She could see him riotously breathing in and out, frantically trying to get some air into his lungs.

"Bucky please. It's Annie," she attempted to sooth but her wavering tone betrayed her fear. She didn't like the look in his eyes. But she continued closer reaching her hand to the loaded gun that followed her every movement. She was sure he did not blink until she laid her hand on the firearm.

She eased the gun down. His frantic eyes landing on her before returning to their common wary gaze. He seemed to regain himself as his eyes darted around the formal dining area in confusion. When his head dropped to glance at the gun that was still firmly wrapped in his calloused hands with Annie's much smaller hands cautiously on top his eyes widened. His face painted with horror at the realisation that he had almost shot Annie as well as a child.

Bucky ripped his hands away from Annie's, shoving the weapon back into his belt. Before she processed this he had already stormed out of the room. Annie knew if she didn't catch him he would distance himself from her. All those weeks of progress in their friendship lost. Or worse.

She desperately chased after his impossibly fast retreat; shaming into walls to order to turn, too afraid to slow down.

She finally caught up to him, finding the distraught man stuffing clothing into his back pack. "Bucky what are you doing?" Annie called internally begging for him to answer.

"Bucky!" She called again when he ignored her presence continuing his packing.

"Are you just going to leave then?!" She shouted resentfully. Her fear disguised by anger.

He finally acknowledged her turning to the enraged woman with his own chaos of emotions. "Annie I almost killed you! Again. I'm not safe for you to be around," he started heatedly but lost sharpness along the way.

This did not cool down Annie was she continued to argue bitterly, "So you're just going to leave because of a few mistakes!" Annie knew she was being harsh but the sudden fear that Bucky would leave her once again had made her terrified. He made her care about him again to just leave at the first sign of trouble.

"It wasn't just a few mistakes. I almost shot you," The ex-assassin argued determinedly. Annie noticed him shove the notebook she gave him into his bag before making his way to the door.

She obstructed his exit just in time. He stared down at her threateningly, "Move".

She stared up at hi with the same unbreakable determination common to all Rogers, "I'm not letting you leave."

He sighed at her hindrance and set his jaw. He easily moved her from the door frame, careful not to harm her. She continued to follow him as he travelled through to the front door of the two story house. She knew any physical attempt would be fruitless. She was no match for Bucky strength-wise but she persisted with her arguing. She was not going to let him leave. He thought he was being noble in protecting her but she didn't need this protection, she needed Bucky. Her friend. The guy who made horrible first impressions but made up for them in the end. The guy who motivated her to be better. And she wanted him to be the guy who stuck with her no matter what.

He strode in long steps, which she struggled to keep up with, to their getaway car. His bag was carelessly thrown in the back seat before he positioned himself in the driver's seat. When he felt the familiar sift in the car he sighed tiredly and turned to his passenger. "Please go out," he almost begged to Annie who sat unwaveringly in the seat beside him.

"No," She responded stubbornly with crossed arms.

Another tired sigh excreted from his mouth, "Then I'll make you."

"Then I'll follow you," the blonde countered. Sometimes he wished she wasn't so stubborn but then again then she wouldn't be Annie. "Like it or not you're stuck with me."

He wearily rested his head on the back of the car seat before looking to her defeated, "Annie you're safe here but if I'm here you and everyone else is in danger. I can't be trusted. HYDRA's after me and I can't even control my own mind. I'm not safe."

She knew what he was trying to do. It was what he always did, look after her safety at the risk of his. Her anger subsided and she confessed, "I don't want to be safe if it means losing you. I know you're doing this for me but this isn't the way. You can't just run away." She ignored the little voice telling her that that was exactly what she was doing to Steve.

He growled in frustration exiting the small car with a violent slam of the door. Annie quickly followed suit. "You don't get it. I'm not safe! I've killed women, children, families. I looked them in the eyes and killed them with my bare hands. I keep remembering more and more of them. I shot a little girl because HYDRA told me to. What's going to stop me from reverting back and trying to kill you? It's already happened once!" His voice lost its fury, dying away as his features softened. "I-I can't handle that Annie. I can't hurt you again." He seemed desperate and frail in that moment. A man pleading because he has no other options.

Annie softened, her shoulders slouched, "HYDRA made you do those things."

"But I still did them," Bucky immediately responded.

She had now walked around the front of the car and rested against the curved hood, "What if I had gone on that mission and fallen off that train? What if I became the Winter Soldier and did all those things? If I wanted to run away on my own for your safety, would you let me?"

Bucky's head tilted to the side ever so slightly as he considered the scenario. "No."

"Would you blame me for what I did under HYDRA's control?"

She was answered with another hesitant "No".

Annie pushed herself off the car and approached the confused Bucky. "I know you've done some things in the past but I know I would have done it too if I had gone through that. Bucky I trust you even if you don't trust yourself yet. I promised to help you remember and I'm not letting you run off halfway. You're stuck with me Buck."

His frown lightened somewhat but he still seemed confused. "Why do you trust me? I'm not that guy you knew. I don't think I can be."

Annie smiled sadly, "You don't have to be Buck. I trust you because you look after me, you always have and you still do. When I was a kid I had to learn how to look after myself as well as Steve. You were the first person to look after me. You knew I could protect myself but you still wanted to. Now you still look after me even though you didn't know me at first. You came back for me at HYDRA. You refuse to sleep to make sure I'm safe even though I wish you would get some sleep." She was right in front of him now with a wide smile slapped on her face.

"You've got my back and I've got yours. That's what we do," she said.

He liked that. No one had ever 'had his back' before. Bucky watched the determined woman in front of him in wonder but he was quickly plagued by another worry. "What if I hurt someone?"

Annie reached around him and pulled the gun from its secured place in his belt. She held the firearm in his view announcing, "Then I'll stop you. I don't think you will but in a worst case scenario I'll have this."

Bucky wasn't sure if Annie would pull the trigger on him if the time came but he liked this alternative. Annie could defend herself against him and he was able to stay with her. Even though he was sure Annie was completely serious about following him. The woman from his knowledge had fierce loyalty.

"So you'll stay?" Annie asked hopefully.

Bucky gave her a rare smile, "You said it, I'm stuck with you remember. And you're stuck with me."

Afterwards to two had faced a terrifying Laura. They offered to leave if she didn't want them in her house. Laura the clever woman that she was knew the signs that Bucky was exhibiting and couldn't bring herself to cause more pain for the troubled man. She forgave the incident but gave a stern warning before leaving them, "But if you threaten one of my kids again I'll take you out.

"You still haven't found them!?" Rumlow screamed impatiently at a generic HYDRA member who had the unfortunate task of informing their violent leader about their failed attempts to locate the asset and the girl.

"He has a metal arm for God's sake! He shouldn't be that hard to find," Rumlow lectured as he aggressively hauled the HYDRA agent uncomfortably close by his tight grip on his shirt.

"Rumlow" the voice of the head science officer called making the HYDRA commander release the startled agent.

"This better be good news" The aggravated leader warned.

"It's certainly something," the officer baffled. "I almost didn't believe it but look at these readings."

Rumlow tried to interpret the flocculating graphs that were projected on the tablet the science officer held to him. The small video of events he knew too well down in the right hand corner of the screen as well as a name he and all of HYDRA knew very well hinted him to the meaning of the science officer's astonishment.

"Is this saying what I think its saying?" Rumlow questioned pointing at the compact screen.

"I believe it is sir. It fluctuates but these readings suggest that the energy rises with adrenaline or trauma."

Rumlow grew excited, "Can we track this?"

"The readings are subtle but if you are in a close enough proximity we can exactly locate it," the officer answered.

"I want the satellite scanning the whole country!" Rumlow shouted out the orders loud enough for every occupant of the room to hear. "This is high priority!"

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